Latest / The Daily Reset Podcast / Stop drifting. Start living on Purpose - the audiobook. Chapter 6

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Stop drifting. Start living on Purpose - the audiobook. Chapter 6 · The Daily Reset Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: chapter six the daily loop people often ask me
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: so what do you actually do every day not occasionally not
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: when life falls apart every day the answer is surprisingly simple i don't try
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: to control my life i simply keep returning to awareness
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_00: because awareness creates choice choice creates different actions
• 0:19
  SPEAKER_00: and different actions create a different life
• 0:22
  SPEAKER_00: for years i thought changing my life required big decisions a new job a new planner
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  SPEAKER_00: a new course a new goal
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  SPEAKER_00: a new version of me i was wrong my life changed
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: because i started changing ordinary days not perfectly consistently i call
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: the rhythm i live by the sage loop state action grow evaluate
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_00: and evolve four beats one day and running through all of it one thread notice
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: everything you need for this is a notebook and a pen let me walk you through
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  SPEAKER_00: a day state before i touch my phone i check in with myself not my inbox myself
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: because if i don't choose my state something else will this takes
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  SPEAKER_00: about five minutes i make a coffee i sit quietly sometimes i meditate for 10
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  SPEAKER_00: or 15 minutes sometimes it's only a couple of minutes of breathing
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  SPEAKER_00: then i ask myself three simple questions
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  SPEAKER_00: how do i feel not how i think i should feel how i actually feel calm anxious flat
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  SPEAKER_00: excited overwhelmed hopeful i simply notice what's contributing
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  SPEAKER_00: to this feeling did i sleep badly am i worried about money am i carrying resentment
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  SPEAKER_00: from yesterday am i avoiding something the goal isn't to fix it
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  SPEAKER_00: the goal is awareness what state do i want to create today
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: maybe today needs courage maybe patience maybe compassion maybe focus i choose it
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  SPEAKER_00: deliberately because my state will influence every decision i make often i write
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  SPEAKER_00: that one word at the top of the page a single intention for my brain to return
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  SPEAKER_00: to whenever i drift then i take the four pillars you met in
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: the reset mind body relationships purpose and i score each one quickly one
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  SPEAKER_00: to five you did the deep audit in the last chapter
• 2:08
  SPEAKER_00: this is the daily pulse 30 seconds some days purpose is high
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_00: and body is low some days relationships are struggling while mind feels strong not
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_00: to judge myself simply to notice where i'm starting from because you cannot decide
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  SPEAKER_00: from there from where you wish you were or
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  SPEAKER_00: where you were last week you can only decide from here
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  SPEAKER_00: the morning check-in is how you find out where here is action once i know where i am
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  SPEAKER_00: and who i'm being today i decide what matters not 20 things one
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  SPEAKER_00: i ask what's the most important thing i can do today that moves my life forward not
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_00: the easiest not the loudest
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  SPEAKER_00: the most meaningful sometimes that's writing sometimes it's making
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_00: the call i've been avoiding sometimes it's resting because my body is asking
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  SPEAKER_00: for recovery rather than productivity the action depends entirely on my state
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  SPEAKER_00: which is why state always comes first then i look at my calendar and ask
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  SPEAKER_00: an uncomfortable question does this day reflect the life i'm trying to build
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  SPEAKER_00: or everyone else's priorities if something needs to move i move it
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  SPEAKER_00: if something needs a no i say no this is where i remind myself daily
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  SPEAKER_00: that being busy is not the same
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  SPEAKER_00: as making progress one meaningful action actually done beats 10 things half attended
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: and let me clear something up while we're here because the name
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  SPEAKER_00: of my company invites the misunderstanding this is not about balance not the kind
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  SPEAKER_00: where every area of your life gets equal hours and you feel guilty whenever
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  SPEAKER_00: the scales tip
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  SPEAKER_00: intentional living is
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  SPEAKER_00: about conscious trade-offs some days i still work 12 hours some days i give
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  SPEAKER_00: a whole afternoon to the people i love both can be intentional the difference isn't
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  SPEAKER_00: the calendar it's whether you chose it or it chose you i choose it
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  SPEAKER_00: then i begin grow growth isn't something i schedule
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  SPEAKER_00: for next month it's something i practice today maybe i read 10 pages of
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  SPEAKER_00: a book maybe i learned something new
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  SPEAKER_00: about ai maybe i practice listening more deeply instead of waiting for my turn
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  SPEAKER_00: to speak
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  SPEAKER_00: maybe i have the difficult conversation i've been avoiding maybe i simply notice one
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  SPEAKER_00: of my old patterns appearing and respond differently than i did yesterday
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  SPEAKER_00: that last one matters more
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  SPEAKER_00: than it sounds growth doesn't always look like achievement sometimes
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  SPEAKER_00: the bravest thing i do all day is pause
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  SPEAKER_00: before reacting whatever i'm currently working on a habit i'm building
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  SPEAKER_00: a boundary i'm practicing a pattern i'm unlearning gets
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  SPEAKER_00: a small daily action tiny actions repeated become transformation
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  SPEAKER_00: you already know i believe that the whole book is
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  SPEAKER_00: that sentence wearing different outfits now here's the part that separates this
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  SPEAKER_00: from every morning routine you've ever tried and abandoned life happens
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  SPEAKER_00: after breakfast someone sends an email that lands badly
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  SPEAKER_00: a meeting goes sideways someone criticizes you the overwhelm starts to rise and
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  SPEAKER_00: an old pattern you met yours in chapter four steps forward to handle it for you
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  SPEAKER_00: the way it has for decades this is where the loop earns its name
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  SPEAKER_00: because the operating system doesn't only run in the morning it's 11 17 on a tuesday
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  SPEAKER_00: and you notice you've drifted that noticing is everything
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  SPEAKER_00: so you reset not tomorrow now stop one breath what am i feeling what story am i
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  SPEAKER_00: telling myself
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  SPEAKER_00: which pattern is showing up fear control people pleasing perfectionism resentment
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  SPEAKER_00: say hello to it by name what am i trying to protect
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  SPEAKER_00: remember the loop from
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  SPEAKER_00: the last chapter focus meaning action this pause is you catching the loop at
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  SPEAKER_00: the meaning point the event has happened the story about it is still being written
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: and for once you're holding the pen instead of the pattern then ask the question
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  SPEAKER_00: that has changed my life more than any other what would responding through the lens
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  SPEAKER_00: of love look like or kindness or compassion take the email that feels unfair
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  SPEAKER_00: five years ago i'd have reacted
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  SPEAKER_00: within minutes defensive hours spent proving i was right resentment carried all day
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  SPEAKER_00: now maybe i don't reply immediately maybe i ask a question instead of making
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  SPEAKER_00: an accusation maybe i assume positive intent maybe i decide
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  SPEAKER_00: the email simply doesn't deserve
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  SPEAKER_00: the emotional energy i've been giving it nothing outside has changed everything
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  SPEAKER_00: inside has that tiny pause 30 seconds at 11 17 unseen by anyone is
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  SPEAKER_00: the actual mechanism of a changed life not the breakthrough
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  SPEAKER_00: not the retreat thousands of small interrupts each one weakening the old pattern
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  SPEAKER_00: and strengthening the person you're becoming one more practice belongs in the day
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  SPEAKER_00: and i learned it in recovery life becomes surprisingly small
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  SPEAKER_00: when everything revolves around me so every day i ask one more question
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  SPEAKER_00: who can i help today sometimes that's a client sometimes
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  SPEAKER_00: a friend sometimes someone i don't know sometimes it's simply listening properly
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  SPEAKER_00: instead of waiting to speak
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  SPEAKER_00: service reminds me that meaning doesn't grow
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  SPEAKER_00: from constantly asking what can i get it grows
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  SPEAKER_00: from asking what can i give it became one of the foundations of balance
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  SPEAKER_00: and eventually one of my seven s's
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  SPEAKER_00: because purpose isn't something we discover it's something we practice evaluate
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  SPEAKER_00: and evolve at the end of the day i don't measure success
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  SPEAKER_00: by how much i got done i measure awareness i sit with the notebook for a few minutes
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  SPEAKER_00: and review the day how was it overall
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  SPEAKER_00: what was my energy like how stressed did i feel how much joy did i experience then
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  SPEAKER_00: a little deeper which emotions showed up today what am i grateful
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  SPEAKER_00: for what challenged me and if i could replay
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  SPEAKER_00: that moment what would i choose instead what did i learn what am i looking forward
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  SPEAKER_00: to tomorrow and then one final question the one that tells me more
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  SPEAKER_00: than any productivity metric ever could was i kind and loving today not perfect kind
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  SPEAKER_00: there's no judgment in any
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  SPEAKER_00: of this only curiosity every evening becomes data every day teaches me something
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  SPEAKER_00: and that's why the e isn't just evaluate it's evolve this isn't
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  SPEAKER_00: a performance review it's asking what did today teach me
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  SPEAKER_00: and how will i use it tomorrow then tomorrow i start again not
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  SPEAKER_00: because i failed today
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  SPEAKER_00: because conscious living isn't something you achieve it's something you practice one
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  SPEAKER_00: day at a time
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  SPEAKER_00: these days i run all of this inside the balance app i built it
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  SPEAKER_00: to hold exactly this practice but for before that it was a notebook and
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  SPEAKER_00: a notebook is all you need and i want to name what this chapter is really claiming
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  SPEAKER_00: because it's the boldest claim in the book most people believe life changes
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  SPEAKER_00: through massive breakthroughs the dramatic decision the rock bottom the retreat
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  SPEAKER_00: that changes everything i don't
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  SPEAKER_00: i believe life changes through thousands of tiny moments where you interrupt
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  SPEAKER_00: the old operating system and choose again at 7am with a coffee and three questions
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  SPEAKER_00: at 11 17 with one breath at 9pm with a notebook and
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  SPEAKER_00: a little honesty days repeated become seasons seasons become a life and
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  SPEAKER_00: the practice feels almost too small to matter
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  SPEAKER_00: right up until the day life hands you a moment
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  SPEAKER_00: that tests everything your days have quietly built i know exactly when that day came
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  SPEAKER_00: for me it started in a birthing pool