Latest / MIDDLE GROUND - Real Conversations on Faith, Identity & Becoming — Through Brynne's LDS Lens of Curiosity, Love and Doubt / Honoring Where You Are: Why Small Steps and Self Compassion Beat Forcing It Every Time
Transcript
- Brynne Erickson (00:00.898) Hello, welcome to the first Walk and Talk with Brynn. A big part of this podcast is me trying to show up as authentically and real as possible. Not just on this podcast, but in the world. And I have this thought today, I'm gonna hop on the treadmill and got some things on my mind that I wanted to share. You're gonna hear my treadmill in the back. Probably gonna be huffing and puffing a little bit, because usually when I'm not a community exerciser in the facts, like if I go for a run, I can't talk. If I'm going on a hill walk with my kids in the stroller and I'm pushing almost 100 pounds of all of them in the stroller together. and I can't breathe and they're like talking to me. I have to tell them, wait till we're done with the walk because I cannot do this. I can't talk to you right now. I'm just trying to breathe and focus. So I can walk and talk, but if I'm doing anything more strenuous, game over. I'm focused, trying to do what I need to do and just breathe. Talking is not doable for me. I always love seeing people who can do that. But on my mind today, is embracing where you are, especially getting on the treadmill, exercise. That has been a thing that has been a battle for me. I've had three babies. So being pregnant and postpartum and just not feeling like exercising, but thinking that I am supposed to. thinking that I should. And then the times when I actually wanted to exercise, but making a way to do that with three little kids around. And their wake schedules and how much they need me. I mean, I'm in the phase where if I get on the treadmill, Brynne Erickson (02:15.584) I have two older ones, a six-year-old and a three-year-old that are getting better and not needing me relentlessly. But I also have a 10-month-old who cannot be around my treadmill while I'm on it. So I have to take in all these factors and it gets overwhelming and stressful and discouraging, quite frankly. And your circumstance might not be... kids or pregnancy but your schedule your what your body is doing at the moment the aches the pains the limitations it's it's disheartening and can get really frustrating but what i have learned is to honor where i'm at and hold fast to my goals and the things I actually want to achieve and just constantly try one small thing to move me closer to making that goal happen. So I was really wanting with this last baby, my third son, I had him in August of 2024 and between my first child and this one I've fluctuated between what 40 pounds and I go in and out of moments of feeling that desperation to lose the weight but as I am trying to love myself as I am no matter my weight and size and shape the more I don't stress so much about the weight as my motive for quote unquote getting in shape. In fact, I don't really use that term anymore. I'm just trying to create a body that allows me to do and live the way I want to and do the things that I want to do. So weight is great, but Brynne Erickson (04:38.478) For me, strength and energy are so much more important now. I had to get really clear on what I wanted my body to be able to support me in doing in this life. And then I realized, okay, what do really want to accomplish? What do really need this body to help me do? And hiking, biking, kayaking, running around with my kids. doing what they're doing. We're going boating. I want to be able to wake surf or wakeboard without completely injuring myself. Running. I would love to do a Spartan race one day. So, oh, and then just simple things. Be able to bend over, go up the stairs without feeling winded, being able to shave my legs. comfortably bending over in that position and seeing my legs. Those are the ones that come off the top of my head, just simple life skills to doing them with ease rather than, Oh, getting up off the floor. Oh my gosh. Who'd have thought that that one gets hard. Right. So I've been wanting to focus on my strength and my energy, not being tired all the time, but coming out of this pregnancy, I was totally tired. and not energized and having a hard time getting up off the floor. And instead of resisting it, I allowed it and it kinda, I kinda had to, I didn't have to, but I worked out super hard for like three weeks trying to do what I could do before, which was HIIT workouts every day. Brynne Erickson (06:42.658) with some walking, some restricted eating, and I did that for maybe a week or two, and then I was just shot. I completely depleted my energy sources, probably shot my adrenals, and for like three weeks, I could hardly function. I was exhausted and needed to nap all the time. And it completely backfired, it became a moment for me to sit with that and be like, okay, well, I thought this is what my body needed to do. And clearly it's telling me that it's not. So what do I need right now? And instead of going extreme and hard, I got creative and that's what's awesome when we realize that there's something important to us and we need to solve it. We start getting creative and we don't shame ourselves about it. So that's the main thing. When we start shaming ourselves, I should be able to do this workout. This should be easy. Why can't I do this? That's all shame. And guess what? That just keeps you stuck. and creates more resistance. So I try and stay away from that as much as possible. And if I fall into those thoughts, I give them a second, I'm like, okay, that's not really what I think and those thoughts really don't support me. So what do I actually want to think? And what's one small thing that I can do to make this happen for me? What I really want for myself. And so then I started getting creative. Going hard like I would before didn't work. So what can I do? All right. Walking. I bet I can go on a walk. My dog could use some exercise too. Take him for a walk. I'll load up the kids. At this time, my oldest one was still in school. So I just had the two other ones and the weather was nice. It was springtime. So I loaded up my double stroller. Brynne Erickson (09:09.28) And then we went on a 15 minute walk, just whenever I felt like it. And that was great. And I swore off hard dieting, never doing that again. And at least you know what, for now, I'm not saying it's a bad thing. It works for people. And if that's what you want to do, then do it because you want to, not because you feel like you should. So that's where I'm at. If I ever want to do that, that's fine. But for right now, I was like, no, I'm not doing any fad diets, anything crazy, no huge lifestyle changes. That's not going to be what I want to do this round. I've done that before. Started my first diet when I was 14, been off and on ever since. And I decided I was just going to continue to pay attention to my hunger cues and walk. And that was enough. And you know, the craziest thing when I gave myself permission to just honor what I wanted to do and what my body felt like I wanted to do. Incrementally, I've wanted to do a little bit more without even like intentionally being like, okay, tomorrow is the day that I do a HIIT workout. I've not once woken up thinking that. or pre and like premeditated what I'm going to do. I'm going to do harder the next day. I haven't had that moment yet. Most of the time it's I'm going to do something tomorrow. How can I move my body in some way to get me closer to that strength and energy, overall strength and energy that I really want? So I wake up, I know I'm going to move. I'm like, what do I want to do today? And I honor that. So today it was walking. Last two days it was nothing. I was so tired. The day before that was Pilates. And the day before that was the three mile hike. Like, it's just so interesting. And I will look at my schedule and also see what I'm able to do. Do I need to work out during nap time? Can it be something that I do while the kids are upstairs playing? I'm gonna take them with me. Brynne Erickson (11:29.678) And there's that problem solving, right? Because I'm trying to accomplish a goal, but my goal is kind of broad. But I know that I'm going to move my body in some way to get there. And I honor what I want and what I need in the moment. And just naturally, I've wanted to do a little bit more. And there's no shame involved. I'm not in this as a race. I'm in this for the long game. I know that urgency certainly helps people at times, but when it doesn't, think that's when you really need to honor where you are. Especially if you're experiencing a lot of stress or grief, those really heavy emotions, that's not the time to be taking care of yourself in the way of exercise and dieting. That's when you need to show up for yourself in love and compassion and doing just making sure you're taking care of your basic needs. And it might take a while. I don't know why we have to put end dates of when our grief needs to end or the things that are whatever that thing is that's hard and heavy in your life. Obviously we don't want to stay stuck there forever. And I think it's important to honor where you are, but also honor where you want to be. Brynne Erickson (13:10.188) So making sure that we keep that end where you really want to be in mind. And checking in with yourself each day. Okay, what's one small thing that I can do to help me get closer to that? All right, today maybe it's drinking one liter of water. It seems small, but for someone who's never done that, that's a big deal. And that's the whole point. To something that seems small. and do it and incrementally you'll want to do more. Cause we just naturally want to grow and become more in small ways and it looks different for everyone. So don't compare yourself to anyone else's goals and their path of becoming who they want to be. We can see other people's and be inspired by them, but we don't need to compare and judge ourselves. So I hope this walk and talk was sure fun for me. I hope it was fun for you. I'll probably do it again. And remember small, simple steps. Honor where you are. Show yourself grace. How can you support yourself where you are and honor more of what you want? And it really does work out. Have a great day.