Latest / The Daily Sarcast / July 17th, 2026: The Wildfires, Successfully Going Off Grid And My Mom Waving At A Catcaller

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July 17th, 2026: The Wildfires, Successfully Going Off Grid And My Mom Waving At A Catcaller · The Daily Sarcast

• 0:00
  Today's episode is brought to you by LinkedIn, where every post begins with,
• 0:05
  I'm excited to announce, like, no you're not, sternly staring at inflation until
• 0:10
  it melts before our withering gaze is not an option.
• 0:14
  The Federal Reserve Governor, Christopher Waller.
• 0:18
  Insert theme song here. This is the Daily Starcast. I give you the news and me be a laugh.
• 0:22
  I'm Lindsay Vernick, and today is July 17th, 2026.
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  What's going on? I'm coming to you live today from Ventnor, New Jersey.
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  I am down the shore for a few days. Since I'm working remote,
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  figured I'd try to get in some pool time, more beach time.
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  Yeah, so my updates will be about being down the shore.
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  So in real news, if you have frozen blueberries in your freezer because you're
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  trying to like be healthy or something, you should probably check the bag before
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  you make your smoothie this morning.
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  So there's this brand of frozen organic blueberries, and they've been recalled
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  after they found out that they might be contaminated with E. coli.
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  The berries have been sold in multiple states, and they're warning people not
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  to eat them, even if they look and smell perfectly fine, because they're not.
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  The CDC says E. coli can cause severe stomach cramps, diarrhea,
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  vomiting, and in some cases, serious kidney complications, especially for kids and older people.
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  So this morning, if your breakfast plan was blueberries, yogurt,
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  and like feeling super healthy, it might accidentally become Gatorade crackers
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  and texting your boss from the bathroom.
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  If you're looking outside and you're like, why does New York and the rest of
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  the East Coast look like it's being filmed through a Snapchat filter from 2016, you're not wrong.
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  Smoke from Canada's wildfires have drifted into New York and much of the Northeast,
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  and it's giving a lot of hazy skies and really bad air quality.
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  They're saying it's not supposed to be as severe as the orange sky apocalypse
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  that we had a few summers ago, but if you have asthma or anything like that,
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  you probably don't want to be outside.
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  Canada really has an interesting export strategy. We get maple syrup,
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  Ryan Reynolds, and now annual wildfire smoke.
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  The smoke will probably stick around through the rest of the day today and is going to turn into wind,
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  which kind of feels like the whole northeast has turned into a giant smoker's
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  patio new york of course is taking it in stride most of the city kind of just
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  looked up yesterday and was like hmm weird and then just kept going about their day outside.
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  And if you think that you're having a normal week, or maybe you're not,
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  let me tell you about these people in Pearl River County, Mississippi,
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  where people are trying to track down a loose emu.
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  So a full-grown emu has been wandering around the area, just casually strolling
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  down roads and through neighborhoods, while animal control tries to figure out who owns this guy.
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  There was a bird caught on video by a local resident and as of right now they
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  still don't know where it came from they're asking everyone to call if they
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  recognize the email or know who it belongs to,
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  it's kind of one of the most strangest public service announcements ever it's
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  like everyone's just getting this phone call hey quick question are you like
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  missing a giant australian bird maybe i don't know,
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  but also like who wakes up looks out the window and is like oh wait, my emu is gone.
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  That's not exactly the kind of pet that you misplace between your couch cushions.
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  But like every state has their own kind of animal, right? Like Florida has their
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  alligators, California has bears, New York has their rats, and Mississippi, I guess, are emus.
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  Hopefully they find the owner of this bird soon, because if not, congrats to the emu.
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  It has successfully become the newest resident of Mississippi in Lindsay life.
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  So last night I was walking down the street to dinner with my sister and my
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  mom and this like random ass car like beeped at us. Like this guy just like beeped at us.
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  Like, you know, and my mom just like, look kind of confused.
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  And then she waves at him. And I was like, no, no, no, mom. Like we don't, we don't wave at them.
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  She's like, what do you mean? I was like, mom, he was calling us.
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  We don't just like wave back. that's not what we do here.
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  So then I had to explain to my mom what catcalling was.
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  I guess my mom has just like been waving at these guys her whole life,
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  like no idea, thinking that she knows them, which like.
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  I guess not really doesn't fall far from the tree, does it?
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  So MVP of this week goes to this guy, Michael Hewitt.
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  He's a 65-year-old England soccer fan, and he went missing during his trip to
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  Barcelona to watch the World Cup.
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  And his family was like so worried, and the police got involved,
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  and then they started an international search.
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  But the whole thing was that Michael actually wasn't missing he was just having
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  a great vacation and like forgot to let his family know,
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  so michael just kind of lost his phone and he didn't contact anyone because
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  he didn't know anyone's numbers,
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  and so for 10 days his whole family and like all of his friends and like the
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  public thought that something really bad happened to this guy but he was just
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  like in barcelona watching soccer at a pub completely unaware.
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  I mean, that takes like incredible commitment to actually get off the grid.
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  People can't really go 10 minutes without checking their phone.
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  This man disappeared for 10 days and accidentally achieved the dream of every dad.
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  No emails, no responsibilities, and no one bothering him.
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  So Michael gets MVP this week because he was actually able to achieve what everybody hopes to do.
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  And while everyone was searching for him, he was actually just doing better
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  than everybody else in the world.
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  Cooking tip of the day. If you put some lettuce on a pan with some olive oil,
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  it sounds really good, but you also need to look up how to cook it.
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  Feedback, comments, questions, and a Jewish boy looking for a date,
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  email me at lindsay at thedailystarcast.com.
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  Thank you so much for listening. Have a great weekend, and I will talk to you guys tomorrow.