Latest / The Sharon Francisco Show / Decide to Make Your Life Easy

Transcript

Decide to Make Your Life Easy · The Sharon Francisco Show

• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Hello and welcome to the Sharon Francisco show.
• 0:05
  SPEAKER_00: Today we're going to talk about how to decide to make your life easy.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: Now, I came up with this because I have a lot of conversations with a lot of women and I've done it for a long, long time.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't know if it's because I grew up in the country and growing up in the country, and maybe because of the mum and dad that I had, I don't know, but I'm a very practical thinker about a lot of things.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: And I hear what a lot of women worry about around their house and around their kids and around the way that they kind of like with dinner and cleaning and all of that kind of stuff.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I honestly don't understand it sometimes.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: So what I thought I would do is share a little bit of information about how my little Sharon Francisco brain works.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_00: And if it doesn't work for you, just flush the stuff that doesn't work.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: And if some of it does, just cherry pick that down and start applying it.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: And remember, I'm particularly black and white when it comes to this stuff.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_00: So if a little bit is jarring, please excuse me because this is how my little brain works.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to share some ideas with you around this.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_00: So here we go.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: If you sometimes feel like, you know, it's groundhog day every day, every week, every month, and you're feeling like you're a little bit over it, like you've had enough.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm probably guessing if you feel like that, you might be on the other side of maybe 40 or 45 because you've probably raised kids, um, you might have teenage kids at home, and you might sort of start feeling like, huh, when's when's life going to start getting good for me?
• 1:59
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm gonna share with you, share with you some ideas on how you can make that happen for you.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: So I often do talk with women about being sick of the routine of life and not feeling excited because I naively I I kind of feel excited most of the time about life.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: And to be honest with you, to begin with, uh for many, many years when I was younger, that just came very naturally to me.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then life started happening when I had kids and life and a divorce and all that kind of stuff.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: And I didn't automatically feel excited about life, and I had to make it kind of a decision to get back to that happy, boppy, excited Sharon.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_00: And I I strive to be doing that more and more as I get older.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_00: And when I make that decision, and I do make it often, that I find that it's easier to tap into.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: So I think it's the first thing is to decide that life is fantastic.
• 3:03
  SPEAKER_00: Make a decision because sometimes it's not, and it can be hard, and you're feeling like you're walking through quicksand and it feels a bit heavy, and that's just life.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: But if you're glass half full and you start to try and see the good in situations, usually it makes you feel brighter and lighter and happier.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: So choose to feel positive, even about the crappy things.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_00: I try to see the crappy things as all right, well, that's a lesson.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'll learn from that one.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: And rather than kind of feel down on yourself or feel like, oh, it's all just hopeless or whatever.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so that brings me to this.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: Why are we still cleaning?
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand it.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you own your own business, and hopefully you do or you're about to if you listen to this podcast, just get another client and pay for the cleaner.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I've heard this before too, but Sharon, they don't do it the way I like.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: Like you're talking to me, right?
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: I don't care.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: I the kids were growing up.
• 4:01
  SPEAKER_00: We had a cleaner every fortnight.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: I did not sweep or clean or do anything in between the cleaner coming and the next time.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: I just like whatever happened, happened.
• 4:13
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, a little bit of like dirt is not going to kill every anyone.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: And it's actually good for you.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: You've got to have a little bit like it cannot, and it's a whole other podcast, but any sort of chemical stuff, like spray and wipe, anything you get from the supermarket that's just commercial stuff, you are spraying chemicals everywhere.
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's actually not good for you.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_00: And that's not what this podcast is about.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're cleaning, get a cleaner.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: If you can't afford the cleaner, get an extra client to pay for the cleaner.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: And and in your head, if you have to justify that, choose the next client that you sign up is to pay for the cleaner.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_00: And if you think that the cleaner doesn't do a good enough job, still get the cleaner for two hours a fortnight or two hours a week or whatever it is.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: And while it may not be up to your standard, and usually that's going to be around the shower or the toilet or something, you can just go in afterwards and do the quick little clean, which will take you 10 or 15 minutes instead of two hours consistently.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: So the cleaner is going to free up a lot of your time.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Get the cleaner.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're doing the mowing or somebody in the house is doing the mowing, get the mower.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: And again, the next client after the cleaner one is the mower client because doing those sort of chores for me personally slowly eats my soul.
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: I can't like I was not born to clean.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: I just I don't want to clean.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: I like a clean house.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: I like it to be, I like the shower to not have any mold.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: I like everything to be pristine.
• 5:54
  SPEAKER_00: My husband Pierre loves a clean house.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: So he's got, we bought a Dyson the other day, and he gets the Dyson out and Dyson's in between, not all the time, but I I don't, I don't have the need to pick the Dyson up and to do the in-between stuff because the cleaner's coming.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: What no need to do that.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_00: So um the other thing that you can get the cleaner to do to make your life feel a little bit like a bit easier is ask them to do things that you may not want to do.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_00: And even if you do love doing it, sometimes it's nice to have other people to do it.
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_00: So chores that are consistent can tend to sometimes get a little bit boring.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: So things like maybe changing the sheets, putting the sheets in the washing, putting new sheets on your bed, um, the kitty litter, getting them to change the kitty litter and put the new kitty litter on.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: I had when we were up at the mountain, the tambourine mountain, we had a cleaner up there and she didn't like to um do the uh kitty litter.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_00: So, and that's fine.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: She didn't want to do that.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: It was like, oh, it's all right, I'll do it, no problem.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: So emptying the dishwasher, if you're sick, I mean, I don't know about you, but when you do things every day, you feel like I know for me with emptying the dishwasher, I just feel like getting the glasses out and it's like done.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: I I've had enough.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: I just don't, I get sick of doing the same thing over and over.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: So having them to clean the dish, it doesn't have to be every time.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: But getting them to do some of the things that you don't want to do anymore, or you're sick of that routine.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: The other thing is if you're sick of cooking or sick of coming up with ideas for food, get something to make your life easier.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, there's things out there now like HelloFresh and things like that that make your life easier.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_00: Like they send the little packs every week and it makes it quicker for you to do it.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: It makes it easier for the kids.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you've got teenage kids to start cooking and making them responsible, I've got more to say on that later in this podcast.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we get something called dinner ladies, which is awesome.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's food that's already cooked, it's frozen, and you just order it.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, it's expensive.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: It's probably not for families.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's probably if you just if it's just a few of you at home.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_00: But I tell you, it is the most delicious food, easy, quick.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: And we just buy vegetables and salad to accompany the dinner ladies' food.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's wonderful.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's all cooked and it's easy.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: Getting your hair done.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_00: Do you remember years ago when the old ducks would go and get their hair set every Friday?
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: They'd you'd see all the old ducks down at the I don't know if that was just in the country, but I loved it.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: I absolutely love that they went and got their hair washed and set and looked beautiful every week.
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_00: I go, I decided to go and get my hair.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I I did it as a special occasion to get my hair washed and straightened.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: Well, it's like a bouncy blow wave, I get.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: I I I'm addicted.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: I can't not do it now.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: I have to get it done every week.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: So I go and get my hair, like the old ducks, I just go and get my hair done every week.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: And it's wonderful.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have to, I used to wash my hair every day.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: I was when I used to do running, I used to wash my hair every day.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_00: I don't, I get it washed every week now.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: And judge me if you want, but I just get I just get it done.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_00: Somebody else washes my hair.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: They give me the most amazing head massage.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: It just feels sensational.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_00: And they do a bouncy blow wave.
• 9:03
  SPEAKER_00: And the amount of comments that I get on my hair, I went to when I went to your mundi in my previous podcast, I talked about that.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_00: I had three people at the Yamundi market say, oh, I love your hair.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, I don't do it, I don't say that, but don't do it.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: Somebody else does it, somebody else washes it, somebody else makes it look great.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_00: And honestly, it's the best thing.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: I also believe that your house is to live in.
• 9:27
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know when this started changing to you have to have a display home to make to make you feel good.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: I think we need to lower our standards around the house.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: I really do.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_00: I think a house is for living.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: When you walk into it, it should have a little bit of stuff on the kitchen table or it should be livable.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_00: I hate going into homes that I feel like I don't like going to homes that are just perfect.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: I don't, I never know where to sit, I don't feel comfortable, I don't feel like I can have a drink.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_00: And if I do have a drink, I hold it because I don't know where I can put it.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: Because I know a lot of people have a lot of rules around that stuff that I don't I had to learn that other people have rules around it.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I just don't.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: And if this is helpful, you can take a little leaf out of my book.
• 10:21
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know why I'm like that.
• 10:23
  SPEAKER_00: And I do think it's probably because I was brought up in the country and that we didn't put a lot of emphasis on having the display home type thing.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: We put a lot of emphasis on going out, working hard, coming home and enjoying life and just making sure that you could enjoy your home.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: And your home is for the conversations, it's for the gathering around the kitchen table and the chats that you have with your children and your husband.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_00: I just believe a home should be a home.
• 10:52
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, get it cleaned every few weeks and make it look nice and tidy it up at the end of the day, but don't make, don't be a slave to your home.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't need to be.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so all that to say, we're gonna go a little bit deeper now.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: I think a lot of people do these things because they think they should.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_00: They think they should be the person that does everything, the go-to person, the person that has it all together.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_00: I used to work years ago with a lady, beautiful lady.
• 11:28
  SPEAKER_00: She had, she was like the the matriarch of the family.
• 11:33
  SPEAKER_00: She organized everything.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_00: She had everything perfect.
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_00: Her house was perfect.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_00: She had all the, she had a book with, I'll never forget this.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_00: This was probably 25 years ago.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: She had a book with every single like where the keys were hidden, where the passwords were, what were like all the details, everything.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_00: She said, Sharon, you've got to have that.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: That should go to for people if you have a fire, if you've got this.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_00: And I thought, wow, what a great idea.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_00: But my head just doesn't think like that.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: I may, I think it's a great idea, and I may do it once, but I'd never keep that kind of thing up.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that women, especially mothers, feel like they have to have all these balls in the air just in case something happens, like a fire or something happens, they're the go-to person.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_00: They've got all the ducks in a row because they're the person, the go-to person.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: I just don't think you need to be the go-to person.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you're the go-to person, what do other people do?
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: They let you be the go-to person.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm I I don't know if this resonates, but if you're not the go-to person, somebody else has to step up, don't they, to do the work and to think and to be the person that does that.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: And it might inconvenience you because they may not do it the same way as you want.
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_00: And you know what?
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_00: I reckon you've got to get over yourself with that.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: If they're not packing the dishwasher the way you want, if they're not folding the closure the way you want, whatever it is, the way you like to do it, I would strongly suggest to let go of that.
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_00: I think that's what keeps us trapped because we've got this whole little thing about the way things should be.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: And you know what?
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_00: There's a million ways that you should or could or way that you can fold your washing or empty the dishwasher and pack the dishwasher or whatever it is.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because the go-to person books the appointments for the school, for the doctors, for the whatever.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_00: They're the go-to person.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_00: What about the person that does the grocery shopping?
• 13:34
  SPEAKER_00: Are you the go-to person for that?
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: With what you know, what you're going to eat, what you're going to have in the cupboard for the kids, what you're going to have ready for if in case somebody comes over.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: What about the driving outs for the kids?
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: Who's the person that does that?
• 13:48
  SPEAKER_00: What about the teacher interviews?
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: And again, the washing, the ironing, the chores.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_00: Who is that person in your life?
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm guessing if you're listening to my podcast, you're it's possibly you.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_00: And if it is you, I reckon it's time to start questioning whether it needs to be you.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe, just maybe, you could lower your standards around the way things should be.
• 14:16
  SPEAKER_00: Because the freedom that comes with that is so much more important than a particular way that a dishwasher needs to be packed or unpacked or clothes folded or whatever.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: I just think lowering your standards and not being that person, you're going to open up a whole bunch of cool things that'll happen when everyone around you go, Why aren't you doing that anymore?
• 14:40
  SPEAKER_00: And you go, Oh no, I just thought you'd be able to do that once or twice, or maybe you could give it a go.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_00: And it'll be a little bit of a shift and a little bit of a change.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_00: But hopefully the others will step up.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: And if they don't, and there's no food in the fridge, and they go to get it and they go, Mom, where's the food?
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: You go, at the supermarket.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_00: They go, Oh, when are you going?
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: Not you go.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: And maybe if their teenage kids are with a job, they might actually put their hand in their pocket and buy a few groceries themselves.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this gets me on to the next thing because again, I don't know where this has come from, but because I have lots of conversations with lots of women, I'm going to talk about this.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: I reckon it's time for your kids to leave home.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Now, if they've got full-time work and they are making money and they're still at home, I reckon you're doing them a disservice.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: Now, this is personal opinion.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: So if you don't agree, let your kids stay at home and do the washing and cleaning and ironing and cooking for them and continue on.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: Or if they're just at home and you're not doing all that, fair enough.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: But I actually think selfishly, I think it's very good for the woman of the house to get the kids gone after they've finished school and they're, you know, maybe even finished uni and they got a full-time job.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_00: I think it's not only good for you, but I think it's good for them.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: Your kids need to stand on their own two feet.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_00: And before you say it, I know what you're thinking, but Sharon, house prices, rent prices.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: You know what?
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_00: If you just put your thinking cap on and think about how this might work, have they got mates?
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, I'm sure they do.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: And if they don't, I'm sure there's other people out there that are in the same situation.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: You can get two or three mates together in a two or three or four bedroom home, and you could all split the rent.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_00: What a novel idea.
• 16:47
  SPEAKER_00: And guess what?
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: What happens when they move out of home?
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, they realize there's electricity costs.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_00: They realize somebody's got to go and get the groceries, somebody's got to cook.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, and somebody's got to wash the clothes.
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_00: And what happens generally is, and part of what I used to say to my kids is that you've got to die on your own sword.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: What does that mean?
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_00: They've got to realize what it's like to do the things that you've been doing for years.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: So if there's no food in their fridge, they think, oh, I've got to go down and buy some food.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: And then they get home with that food and then they've got to cook their dinner.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_00: And to begin with, yeah, they're going to buy takeout and they're not going to clean their clothes, wash their clothes, and they're not going to iron it.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then they're going to go out and possibly start dating somebody.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: And they're going to realize that they're going to need to wash the clothes if they want to be attractive to the opposite sex.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: And they're going to start having to do some of the things that you've been doing where they realize that they've got to grow up.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I really think, I don't know if this is controversial or not, but this is the way I've always thought.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: And definitely with my kids, I was ready for them to move out when they moved out because I think it's good for them.
• 18:08
  SPEAKER_00: I really do.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_00: Both of my sons um live overseas now.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_00: Um, Zachy lives in San Francisco.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_00: He's been over there for nine years.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_00: He runs a very tight chip of a house.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_00: It's beautiful.
• 18:18
  SPEAKER_00: It's I went to visit him last year.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_00: It was chip shape.
• 18:22
  SPEAKER_00: It was wonderful.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_00: He had he runs a beautiful house.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: He's does a cookup once a week, and he's got all that sorted.
• 18:28
  SPEAKER_00: My other son moved to Barcelona last year.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_00: And he's honestly the way that he's done his little unit up and how it looks, it's just incredible.
• 18:37
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't know if they would have done that easily, as easily overseas if they didn't have to get out here and live for themselves and do their own thing.
• 18:47
  SPEAKER_00: So I think it's not only great for you because you're no longer having to keep all those balls in the air and make sure everything's in the fridge and washed and cleaned and set up, but it's good for them because they get their independence and they understand what needs to be done and they they get that they need to put some money aside, they need to pay for their rent, they need to pay for the groceries, and they need to look after themselves.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_00: So, why does this matter?
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: Again, I think it's very good for you, and I think it's very good for your children and for your adult children.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: And it might even sound like it's being a bit selfish.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_00: And you know what?
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_00: Good, good, because you know what?
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: The business lesson is with this is that you're always available.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: Think about it.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_00: If you're always available for your kids, for your partner, for everyone in your household, it usually spills over to your business.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: Think about that.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_00: How often are you the go-to person at any given time in your business without setting boundaries for yourself?
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: Think about the boundaries.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_00: When are they communicating with you?
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: Are they communicating with you out of hours and you're answering?
• 20:02
  SPEAKER_00: Think about scope creep.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, just do that a little bit more because I know it needs to be done and I know that they need it, and they're really good people, and I'll just do it anyway, and I won't charge for it.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: Think about invoicing.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_00: How often do you invoice your clients?
• 20:16
  SPEAKER_00: I know a lot of people don't invoice regularly because there's some sort of thing going on in your head around value and should I or could I be selfish.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: You did the work, you owe them, they owe you the money.
• 20:29
  SPEAKER_00: You deserve it.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where I think it comes back.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_00: This business, the way that we do business, I think is a bit of a reflection of the way that we do life in our house.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_00: Being available anywhere, anytime, on weekends, on holidays, the amount of women that I talk to that do not have holidays, proper holidays with a break.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_00: They take their laptop because they've got, if they're bookkeepers, they're doing payroll.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_00: They might just answer some quick messages.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_00: If they've got messages, they're always on.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_00: You know what?
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_00: It does not have to be that way.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to be available all the time.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_00: People get it.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_00: You need a holiday.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_00: And if you say to your clients, I need a holiday, I need a break, they'll go, Yeah, I get it.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: I understand.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, sure.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: I off you go, enjoy yourself.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: If you say it in a way that they understand, they'll get it.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: Selfish or a better word might be control of your own time and the way that you play the game makes a much more profitable, calmer, nicer entrepreneur, much more relaxed.
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_00: I really think you taking back your own power, putting boundaries around the way that you do things makes you a much better person for yourself, not for other people, for yourself, so that you feel like you have.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: Got control of things and that you don't feel like you're on all the time.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_00: Right, let's talk about the research and the evidence.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: There is a book called The Lazy Genius, and it was written by Kedra, Kendra Adachi.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to say that again.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_00: Kendra Adachi.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_00: It's going to be in the show notes if you want to read it.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_00: It helps you stop trying to do everything perfectly.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_00: It also shows you how to decide what genuinely matters in your life.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's practical ways to reduce that mental load of all the things that you're carrying in your head.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: It helps you make everyday life easier and less overwhelming for yourself.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: And it reinforces that life does not have to be as hard as what we make it.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: If there was anything that I said about the way that I run my life and you think, yeah, no, that's not me, flush that.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_00: Don't do it.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: But cherry pick some of the things that might, you might go, maybe I'll order some of that HelloFresh or dinner ladies and give it a bit of a go.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: Or I might give a cleaner a go.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_00: I know that the last time I got a cleaner, you know, it wasn't really, they didn't do it the way that I wanted it.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe pay a little bit more, or just to make a decision to clean up after them.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_00: And while it won't take you two hours to do it, it might take you 15 minutes, half an hour.
• 23:14
  SPEAKER_00: So at least you've reduced the amount of time that you're doing it.
• 23:18
  SPEAKER_00: So the practical takeaways: book the cleaner, or get the cleaner to change the sheets, maybe for you, with all the sheets that need to be cleaned and put it in the washing machine before they go.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_00: So then all you have to do is hang them out, put them back on the bed.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_00: So the question sometimes comes up around this that I can't afford it.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: I find that if this comes up for you, the person listening to this podcast is usually the person that needs it the most.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I bet if the kids wanted$80 for something new, you'd go and get it for them.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_00: If they said, Mom, I need this, you'd go, Yeah, sure.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: What is it?
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_00: You need a new basketball, you need a new outfit for the sport, you need a new whatever a fuel for the car, you would put your hand into your pocket and you'd give them the money for that.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_00: Give the money to yourself.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: Book the cleaner, book the mower, get the food that's easier to prepare for yourself.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: Or if this is a business purchase, you would make the justification for a business purchase.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_00: Or if it's for somebody else, you'd make it happen.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: Do it for you.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_00: You will love yourself so much more when you're not running around for everyone else.
• 24:39
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to close with this.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_00: You are in control of this.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to be everyone else's go-to person.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_00: You can still say no and still be a good mum and a good wife and feel fantastic about yourself.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: Actually, you'll be a better version of yourself because you won't be so tired and running around for everyone else and feeling like you have to keep all those balls in the air.
• 25:06
  SPEAKER_00: No, with a full stop.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's a full sentence.
• 25:10
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: No explanation, no over-explaining why.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: Just nope, can't do it.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry, you'll have to do that.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: That's it.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Don't have to explain it.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_00: No.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: And just watch how much you turn into a lighter, more fun, carefree version of yourself.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: It works, guys.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_00: You do not have to keep all those balls in the air.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_00: Start thinking about ways that you can delegate and get things off your plate.
• 25:40
  SPEAKER_00: That book sounds fantastic.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't read it.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: But if you need any sort of practical backup to this message and you want to learn more about how you can actually apply it, The Lazy Genius Way by Kendra Adachi is the book that I refer to, and it'll be in the show notes.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_00: Hopefully, this has been helpful.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_00: Again, I'd love to hear your feedback on my new version because it's just me riffing and chatting about things that I kind of are interested in.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_00: And hopefully it's helpful.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_00: Love your feedback.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_00: Sharon at sharanfrancisco.com and talk to you soon.
• 26:12
  SPEAKER_00: Bye.