Latest / Evolutionary Men / Men's Group Experience
Transcript
- 0:00All right, and welcome back. So this is a turbo episode where I just want to announce and talk
- 0:06about men's group experience, the new offering I've put out into the world that I think is the
- 0:12simplest and easiest way for any man to experience the power of a men's group. Now, if you follow
- 0:17me, if you follow evolutionary men, you know that's important because I do believe every man should be
- 0:23in a men's group, and that's part of my mission. I think it is the most potent leverage point we have
- 0:29for quite frankly, changing the planet, changing humanity, and improving the level of suffering
- 0:35in the world. And if you've also heard me on the show, you know with men's groups in particular,
- 0:42I believe we can only grow them fast enough through a decentralized model. What that means is they're
- 0:49peer-led. We're not paying someone else to facilitate them. We're actually co-leading them and co-creating
- 0:57them. That's a huge shift, which takes us from consuming someone else's group to co-creating
- 1:03the group we want to be part of. And why that's important is it creates more commitment and
- 1:10ownership in the men that are part of it. The groups I'm in that are the most durable and still going
- 1:16are all these peer-led decentralized groups because they're ours. Nobody can take them away from us.
- 1:24And men's group experience, while it is a program and an offering, what it really is, is a framework
- 1:29for how to launch a group like that yourself. And so it's a 12-week experience you'll go through with
- 1:36five other men. And each week, you get to experience getting embodied, getting connected to the guys,
- 1:42facing edges, and building real skills and capacities to deal with the stresses of your life.
- 1:49I give you the tools. I give you the framework. But you got to show up.
- 1:53Now, the way it works in terms of creating the shared leadership is I'm not just going to throw
- 2:00you in the circle and say, go. So for the first six sessions, I facilitate virtually, right? There's a
- 2:07pre-recorded session for each of the first six meetings. You just hit play on, and I will guide you guys
- 2:13through a really potent meeting. But then, and this is really important for the six at the back half of the
- 2:20program, you're each going to have a turn to lead. I will still give you the structure and what to do in
- 2:27the meeting, and you'll know exactly how to lead the other men. But you'll have the experience of being
- 2:34the men's group facilitator and really holding the presence for the circle and the group. And that is a
- 2:40deeply empowering thing if you've never done it before. And by the end of that 12 sessions, your group
- 2:47will have a framework and skills and capacities that if you guys won, there is absolutely nothing
- 2:53stopping you from beating, frankly, for the rest of your lives.
- 2:57You may also choose to just do the 12-week experience and let it go from there. That's totally
- 3:03okay. But what's important is you will have experienced the power of a group that if you then want,
- 3:09you can take it offline. I love, love virtual groups, and I've been astounded at how powerful they are.
- 3:16I'm part of three of them at this point that meet at various times throughout the year. And I cannot
- 3:22imagine my life without these men in it. And the truth is, they wouldn't be in my life in quite the
- 3:28same way if we didn't meet virtually. Now that said, I'm also part of a physical meet space group,
- 3:35right? Where we actually get in the room and there's something really special about that. But for some men,
- 3:41they live in an area where they can't connect with guys like that, or there just aren't men who are
- 3:44interested in the work. That's where virtual can be a really huge win. But if you do want to take your
- 3:51group offline, so to speak, and start one, you'll have lived the experience and know how to do so
- 3:57thanks to men's group experience. And if you really want to take that framework and run with it,
- 4:02creating your own virtual groups or creating your own offline groups, peer-led, or frankly,
- 4:08yeah, ones people pay you for, you can also sign up for my program, Men's Group Mastery, which is
- 4:15another 12-week program, but it's all about the facilitation side of things. It's about giving you
- 4:21the tools, the structures, and the knowledge base so you feel rock-solid leading groups or deepening
- 4:28existing groups, whichever one works for you. Now, you can do mastery on its own if you're like,
- 4:34yeah, I just want to lead. But what I recommend is actually doing them both together. So doing the
- 4:40bundle, which means first you walk the walk, you experience this 12-week transformational mechanism
- 4:47I've created. And then inside of mastery, you learn all the tools to really feel confident about taking
- 4:53it out in the world. You can do a men's group experience alone if you just want to participate.
- 4:58You can do mastery alone if you just want to lead. But like I'm saying, the best way is to do them both
- 5:05together, where you'll have lived the experience. So then you can lead from authenticity and integrity
- 5:12and an embodied knowing of what you're taking the other men through, even if they're guys you've been
- 5:18sitting in circle with for a long time. And for those of you that are really pumped about men's groups,
- 5:23I do have a mentorship track as well where you can work closely with me and I'll help guide you
- 5:29through your group and you can even get listed on my website. Again, the whole point of men's group
- 5:35experience and all these offerings is this work needs to scale. You are not the only man that's
- 5:42struggling in your life. If you're listening to this podcast, if you found it, you're quite honestly,
- 5:47probably ahead of the curve in terms of getting support and help and examining yourself as a man.
- 5:53But there are a lot of guys out there who are totally lost, totally disconnected, and do not know
- 6:00where to start and do not know how to go deeper than that surface level. So many of us guys default
- 6:06to of talking about the game or talking about the woman or whatever that might be, even though inside
- 6:12we're totally suffering, but we're just ashamed or don't have the skills or have just been hammered
- 6:20over the head about what a real man is and that he should never share these things. But I can tell you,
- 6:24I've been in men's groups now for 20 years. I've been leading groups since about 2017. And when you
- 6:31give a man a safe, deep space, every man has something they need to share and bring forward
- 6:38that they will be better off for, for doing so. And men's group, the men's group experience
- 6:45is a way to support other men in doing this. You go through it, you're going to be with other guys.
- 6:53You will then have a tool set and skills that you can take out into the world, whether you do
- 6:59mastery or not. And frankly, you might bond so deeply with the five other men in your group,
- 7:05you just keep meeting every other week, every week, every month, every quarter, whatever it is
- 7:11that works for you guys. I consider men's group to be my heartbeat, right? My life might get crazy.
- 7:19I might drop out of presents. I might get frazzled or stress, but I know in my life, at least every other week,
- 7:26I'm dropping in with men who expect me to show up fully and to get in touch with what's most important
- 7:35in my life and speak to it. It has transformed my being more than anything else I've done. I've done coaching,
- 7:44I've done workshops, I've done plant medicines, I've done therapies, and they're all great and they're
- 7:50really important. You can think of men's group as the space with which you can integrate all that work
- 7:57into. You're going to live it and you have to build skills and capacities to effectively be part of a group,
- 8:04right? You have to learn to bring your inner experience out and you have to learn to be present
- 8:11with other men's inner experiences. And this is a really big deal, particularly in this day and age.
- 8:17One of the most important things you can do as a man is learn to stay connected even when things are
- 8:27intense, even when you don't agree with something. And while oftentimes men's groups will bring together
- 8:33like-minded men, it can be very different than the type of men you might experience otherwise.
- 8:39There might be guys in your group you don't see eye to eye with politically, culturally, spiritually.
- 8:46There might be guys in your group that trigger you, that make you upset for some reason.
- 8:51And guess what? That friction is what you need to grow as a man. Learning to stay connected, see below the surface,
- 9:00that's the skill and capacity we need now more than ever. It can be overwhelming to do that in the outer world.
- 9:13There's so many people and so many agendas, but a men's group will give you a container to go deeper
- 9:20and to get real with other guys and allow you to get real. So many of us men just hold too much inside.
- 9:31And we suffer for it. We disconnect for it. And then we have to numb ourselves or try to achieve our way out of it.
- 9:39And frankly, it doesn't work. I've worked with hundreds of men at this point.
- 9:43And whether you're a man who's on the painful end of the spectrum where life's just not working,
- 9:48can't quite get the job you want, or you're always broke, or maybe you're struggling dating.
- 9:53And then you look over at the other side and you see the guy that's incredibly successful, has a lot of money.
- 9:59Maybe he has a wife and kids and family. Guess what?
- 10:02That guy suffers too in ways you might be shocked by. All men are suffering. And all of us men tend to hide it inside.
- 10:10And it doesn't make us a victim to start to talk about that. What a men's group does is it allows us
- 10:18to take responsibility for our pain and work with it. Right? A victim doesn't take responsibility for their pain.
- 10:28They point that responsibility out everywhere else. And there are times that is entirely appropriate,
- 10:34but it's not always appropriate. And a men's group is going to help you see
- 10:39what do you have agency and control over on your side of the court? What can you take ownership of?
- 10:46And I can tell you in my life and in many men I've worked with,
- 10:51it feels so much better when we realize and build the skills and capacities for,
- 10:58oh, I have agency. I can influence the outcome of my life. I'm not helpless. Right? I can take
- 11:07responsibility. And the second I take responsibility, it means I can start to change things. And men's
- 11:13groups are one of the most powerful ways to do that. We are not meant to do it alone. We are social
- 11:20creatures. And even as men, the way we bond, I've talked about, is through vasopressin. Right? It's
- 11:28dealing with stressful things together. Whether that's the war, whether that's the hunt, whether that's
- 11:34building something. All the old platitudes you can think about from times before. The game's starting to
- 11:40change now where, just as important, is dealing with the stresses of the inner world and learning
- 11:47how do we orient in this incredibly complex day and age. A men's group is going to get you more
- 11:53connected to yourself and your body, more able to stay relationally open with other people, and far
- 12:01more clear about where your attention should be in any moment of your life. And when those three things
- 12:08are really happening, it's just way better. So again, in short, men's group experience is enrolling now.
- 12:18It's a 12-week virtual journey. You'll meet over Zoom, and you'll meet with five other guys. Half of the
- 12:25sessions will be pre-recorded videos where I'll be facilitating, and half the sessions will be led by you
- 12:32guys. So you're actually going to get the power and take some responsibility for your group.
- 12:38So it's a great opportunity to step up and step out. At the end of the 12-week experience, your group will
- 12:45have all the tools you want to either continue in perpetuity together or go off and create your own
- 12:51things. And if you really want to deepen your capacity as a facilitator and leader of men's groups,
- 12:56you can also do the mastery program where I'm going to teach you everything I've learned about how to
- 13:01create groups, how to connect them, how to find the right men, you name it. Practices you can do,
- 13:07it's all there in mastery. And if you really want to go even deeper, I do have a mentorship track where
- 13:14you're going to meet with me, and I will help you create your group, get it out there, and even show up
- 13:19when I can. And so you can do all these things independently. You can do them all together if you
- 13:26really want to walk the walk. But this is it. Men need help. You likely are struggling with something
- 13:33in your life. And here's the thing: your willingness to step in and handle that in connection and community
- 13:39with other men. That is leadership. Because that starts to show them the way out. And the more you
- 13:46step into your journey of getting support, the more easily you're making it, the more easy you're making
- 13:52it for other men to do the same. We all have this fantasy that someone else is going to fix the world.
- 13:59But the truth is, it's on us. One man at a time. Grabbing another brother and taking him deeper.
- 14:07That is really what the power of the men's group is about. And it's really what you can experience now
- 14:14through the men's group experience. So easiest way to learn more and follow up if you have any questions
- 14:20with me is just go to mens.group and it'll take you to the page with everything you need to know about
- 14:26the program. We start the first week of June, so definitely check it out now and sign up. And I'm
- 14:32going to get you into a potent group with some kick-ass men. And you're going to have what I hope will be
- 14:36one of the experiences of a lifetime and have built some skills and capacities that are going to impact
- 14:42every area of your life. All right. Until next time.