Latest / The Art of Love With Lucia / Episode 649: The Key Sign Your Ex Is Hurting

Transcript

Episode 649: The Key Sign Your Ex Is Hurting · The Art of Love With Lucia

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  If you're in no contact and haven't heard from your ex,
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  you're probably thinking that they don't care about you
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  anymore and that they are doing just fine without you.
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  But are they? Well, there's one way to know
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  whether they're actually hurting, even though you haven't
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  heard from them. What is it?
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  Stay tuned and you'll find out. Hi, this is Lucia.
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  I'm a dating and relationship expert specializing in helping
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  you get your ex back. And welcome back, my beautiful
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  no contact army. Have you been a good little
• 0:26
  soldier or a bad little soldier? If you've been a good soldier,
• 0:29
  then you have downloaded my app Silencio to help you stay in no
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  contact and the link is underneath every single video
• 0:35
  and podcast. And if you too would like to
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  join our no contact army, all you have to do is hit the
• 0:41
  subscribe button and the Bell notification and you're in.
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  And to read our manual, go to nocontactsecrets.com where you
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  can read 2 free chapters before you purchase the book.
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  So you're in no contact and you're in a lot of pain.
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  And you need a sign that your ex is also in pain, because that
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  would actually, strangely enough, make no contact easier
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  for you, since that actually gives you hope.
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  And one of my clients is actually going through this
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  right now. And I can't give a lot of
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  details as the situation is still ongoing, but he was the
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  dumpy and he left a message recently in which he was crying
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  and I got mad. Nobody makes my clients cry.
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  I didn't know that his situation was as bad as it was until he
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  told me. And so I'm like, that's it.
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  We're going to war her. So I had to make a few key
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  moves. And in literally two days, we
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  found out that his ex is actually in pain.
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  So what is the key sign? Well, that is that she's angry.
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  She went off on him after we made our moves and she told him
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  how mad she was, etcetera, etcetera.
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  Again, I cannot say it too much right now.
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  I wish I could because it's a great story, because I have to
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  respect my client's privacy obviously.
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  So this tells me he has a very good chance of getting her back
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  because to her he seems to be moving on and now by getting
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  angry she wants a reaction, which would be her reassurance
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  that if she changes her mind he'll take her back.
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  However, as per my instructions, he's very calm and cool and non
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  reactive. Because remember our slogan, We
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  don't react. We do no contact.
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  So while you're in no contact, here are some messages, some
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  types of messages that your ex may send you when they are
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  hurting. The first one is that they may
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  send messages that are rude, disrespectful, they yell at you,
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  they're sarcastic. May they may say something like,
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  eh, you're not talking to me now as one person got that message.
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  And of course you want to respond with, excuse me, you're
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  the one who wanted me out of your life.
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  Of course I'm not talking to you now, but of course you're not
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  going to send that message, you're not going to react
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  because if they sent this type of message, it's obviously
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  because there's they still care. And behind that anger is fear.
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  Fear that if they change their mind, you won't take them back.
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  And I always say not to respond to messages unless they are
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  apologetic and humble. So you don't need to respond to
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  those type of messages unless of course you cheated or took them
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  for granted. And if you did take them for
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  granted, I've done a video on that and I'll put the link in
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  the upper right hand corner on YouTube.
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  Another type of message that they may send is that they will
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  actually tell you that they're in pain and that they're hurting
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  over the breakup. But they don't say they want to
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  get back together. And in fact, they may actually
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  say that they don't want to get back together.
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  So don't get sucked in by the fact that they say that they're
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  hurting. That doesn't necessarily mean
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  that they're ready to get back together, at least not right
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  now. So again, they're looking for
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  that reassurance that if they change their mind, you'll still
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  be there. So in this case, they are being
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  humble. They're being real and you can
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  respond to this type of message and you can say something like,
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  well, I'm sorry to hear that. However, I respect your decision
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  and I wish you nothing but the best.
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  Sounds like HR high firing someone.
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  So you want to be, you know, polite, but you don't want to
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  reassure them that you're still there for them.
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  And if anything, when you send that type of message, it looks
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  like you're moving on because you're saying that you respected
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  their decision, which means you're not going to fight it,
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  which implies that you're moving on.
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  So I know it may freak you out to hear me say that, but it's
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  actually a good thing for your ex to think that you're moving
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  on. And in fact, I did a whole video
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  on that. And yes, I will put the link in
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  the upper right hand corner on YouTube.
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  And before I give the final type of text you may receive from
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  your ex, if they're hurting, be sure to subscribe so you don't
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  miss out on any future videos. It's free, so why not?
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  OK. And then finally, the third type
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  of text is that they will send a very long message where they
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  blame you for everything and don't take ownership of
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  anything. And no, you're not going to
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  respond to that message. If you don't respond to these
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  messages, they're either going to continue to send them or
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  they'll eventually realize that you're not going to respond and
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  either change their tune and approach you more respectfully
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  or leave you alone, at least for now because they want to regroup
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  and figure out how to get a reaction since their messages
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  are obviously not doing the job of getting a reaction from you.
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  But rest assured that they are hurting and they are looking for
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  reassurance from you. So now I want to hear from you.
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  Have you gotten that angry message or text from an ex?
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  What did it say? We want to know.
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  Drop it in the comments below and in the meantime, if you
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  would like my help to get your ex back, you can contact me at
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  theartoflove.net and we will send you the rates.
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  They are not on the website. The direct link to that is
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  underneath every single video and podcast.
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  If you found this video helpful, please like, subscribe and
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  share. If you're listening to this as a
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  podcast, please rate and review. And finally, remember that love
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  inspires, empowers, uplifts and enlightens.