Latest / Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot / Facing Giants 6/7: Learn How to Find Rest in the Middle of the Battle: Self-Care Saturday Strategies.

Transcript

Facing Giants 6/7: Learn How to Find Rest in the Middle of the Battle: Self-Care Saturday Strategies. · Dr. Derek H. Suite MD - The SuiteSpot

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Well, all right now, you made it.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: You made it to Self-Care Saturday here on the Sweet Spot.
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Beautiful souls, warriors, sweet spotters yes, you've been going in all week with me, dr Derek Sweet here, your board-certified psychiatrist who specializes in high performance.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: You've been going in all week with me.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: You've been digging in here at the sweet spot where neuroscience and ancient wisdom and real life courage is colliding here to help us rise and find our deeper selves.
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: You've been moving heavy all week with me in this whole thing about facing giants.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: We've been looking at the story of David and Goliath and drawing wisdom from everything that happened there, because this story about David facing Goliath isn't just about these two beings.
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: It's about everything in life that we face that's bigger than us.
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: It's about the obstacle that's in the way.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: It's about the challenges that come that seem impossible, and it provides us hope, it gives us direction, it gives us a pathway to deal with whatever giant you're facing.
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: And remember, all week long we've said, yes, there's some giants out there.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: You just got to look in the news or listen to the news and you can understand.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: There are giants in the world.
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: But at the end of the day, there's some giants inside of us too.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Sometimes a giant is a bad habit, a really bad habit, and we've got to slay it.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: And all week long we've looked at how you face and handle and tackle your giants.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: We talked about the idea that you've got to name that giant.
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: Remember that that was Making Moves Monday.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: It seems so long ago that we talked about that and, if you forgot, go back and listen to Making Moves Monday because it will give you the strategy of naming and identifying and circumscribing this giant so that you can handle that giant.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: On Tuesday, take Action.
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: Tuesday we talked about dropping what's not fitting, getting rid of the things that don't fit.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: Don't wear armor that's not yours.
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: Don't try to fight like somebody else, because you don't have to fight like somebody else to win like you.
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: Remember Wednesday we talked about you've got to take aim somebody else, because you don't have to fight like somebody else to win like you.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Remember wednesday we talked about you've got to take aim and then you've got to fight and you've got to hit it.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: You got to hit that.
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: Forehead of the giant.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Aim with focus was our whole talk on win it all wednesday, oh man.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: And then we charge forward by trusting ourselves on Thursday, trusting the higher power in us, having self-trust.
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: Remember, on the Trust Yourself Thursday, we talked about this whole idea of like look, david trusted God, he trusted himself and that was enough.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: God plus you is enough.
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: That's a whole army right there, you and God, you and your higher power.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: And then we finished strong on Friday.
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: But now, oh boy, it's time to rest, and rest on purpose.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: David found rest.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: He wrote this in Psalm 4.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: In peace I will lie down and sleep for you alone, lord, make me dwell in safety.
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: I'll repeat that.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: In peace I will lie down and sleep for you alone, lord, make me dwell in safety.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: David wrote that.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: And you know what's wild?
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: David didn't rest.
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: After all, the giants were gone.
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: That's the thing he learned to rest while the battles were still going on.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: His piece wasn't about the absence of pressure.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: It came from presence, god's presence and his own presence.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: That's the idea, that's the piece that sometimes gets a little lost, in that we think every giant has to be slayed and things have to be all good before we can rest.
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: The real trick from the ancient wisdom is to find your rest in him, find your rest in the middle of the battle, find a way to recover.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: Do the recovery work while the battle is going on.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: Don't just fight, fight, fight, fight and come back to fight the next day.
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: Do the recovery, get some restoration and come back.
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: And sometimes that's in your mind that you have to do that.
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: And the neuroscience you know I'll never not share some neuroscience with you From a neuroscience lens true, rest doesn't mean sleep or vacation.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: No, rest happens when your nervous system shifts out of the survival mode, the fight or flight, into repair and recovery mode, what we call the parasympathetic state.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: When you allow yourself to get into the parasympathetic state, a shift happens and you're able to sleep, you're able to rest, you're able to recover.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: And that shift happens not only in sleep but through other modalities that we teach, things like deep breathing, mindfulness, emotional processing, prayer, meditation, real connection with nature, going for a walk a simple thing like going for a walk or sitting and talking with somebody you really love and care about, reconnect you with others.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: Rest is a lot more than just slowing down.
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: It's about resetting your inner world so you're ready for what's next.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: So there's a quote that I remember the peace of the world is not about the removal of the threat, it's about the presence of God in the middle of the threat.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: And that's what David did.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: David didn't rest because he was done fighting.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: He rested because he trusted in something.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: And you've got to find that thing you trust in the middle of facing your giant, because you have got to care for you in the middle of the fight.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: Whatever you're fighting, if it's pressure, if it's criticism and let me tell you, david faced all of that they criticized him, they thought he couldn't beat this giant.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: But here's the thing Don't worry about what other people think, it has nothing to do with you.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: Whatever you're facing, find a place to care for you.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: David rested because he trusted, not because he just needed to rest.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: He trusted, he grounded himself in God's faithfulness, he reflected on past victories and he surrounded himself with the right people.
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: And all three of those things, my friend, you can do too.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: You can ground yourself in the Most High, your higher power, your God.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: You can reflect on past victories Very important.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: A lot of us don't do that.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: We just write off the victory and we move on.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: No reflect.
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: That's what David did, you remember?
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: He talked about the bear and the lions.
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: He talked about how he was prepared in the field to fight the giant.
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: You have been prepared to fight the giant you're facing right now.
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: Just reflect on the things that you've done, on all the accomplishments that you've made, on the wins that you've had of what you've overcome.
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: And then he surrounded himself with the right people.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: You have to do the same thing.
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: Don't talk to naysayers.
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: Don't get yourself tangled up with worry, warts and people who only have the statistics of what's wrong.
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Don't listen to that stuff.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Give yourself spiritual rest, and that kind of rest strengthens your soul so the next fight doesn't break you.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: Real talk.
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: Self-care is not soft.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: It's not a reward for slaying the giant.
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: It's part of your training and survival.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: You have to rest so that you can gather your strength to deal with the pressure, to deal with the problem, to deal with the challenge.
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: To come back at it again, david didn't just recover from the battle.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: He reflected.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: That's a skill.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: What are you reflecting on today?
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: Reflect on something good.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: He remembered the lines in the beers.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: He strengthened himself in the Lord, the bears.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: He strengthened himself in the Lord.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: He meditated, he wept, he worshipped and then he came back stronger.
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: That's you, it's not David.
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: Don't just look out there and think that it's David out there.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: That's you on the battlefield.
• 9:39
  Speaker 1: That's you facing Goliath.
• 9:41
  Speaker 1: That's what you have to do.
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: What lions and bears did you overcome in your life?
• 9:46
  Speaker 1: How are you strengthening yourself in God?
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: How are you meditating?
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: How are you praying?
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: Are you weeping?
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: Are you worshiping?
• 9:54
  Speaker 1: How are you taking care of yourself?
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what this is about.
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: So today, don't just crash.
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: I want you to recover, I want you to reflect and I want you to restore.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: That's the challenge on Self-Care Saturday.
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: Right now.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: Take a deep breath.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: I bet you haven't taken a deep breath all day.
• 10:19
  Speaker 1: Now is the time we're going to do it right here, right now.
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: Deep breath in and then out slowly.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: That's what we do when we're teaching mindfulness with athletes and performers.
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: We practice breathing.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: We practice making the exhale longer than the inhale.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: We start right there.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: They're all different types of breathing and that's a whole separate episode.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: So breathe, and I want you to journal one win that you had this week.
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: I don't care how small it is.
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: Say it out loud, reflect on it, write it down if you can.
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: Where did you show up?
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: Where did you see your strength?
• 11:14
  Speaker 1: Because you've got to put your prefrontal cortex on that.
• 11:17
  Speaker 1: You've got to put your thoughts on what's working and then spend 10 minutes okay, 5 minutes in silence, prayer or stillness, meditation.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: Let God meet you there.
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: In stillness we find our true selves.
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: In stillness we find our truest self, the word.
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: The ancient wisdom puts it differently Be still and know who is God.
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: But the world tells you the opposite.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: The world says keep it moving, pick up your cell phone, let's go.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: But real warriors know that rest is part of the strategy and you, my friend, are a warrior.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: I'm Dr Derek Sweet.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening to me today on Self-Care Saturday.
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: Tomorrow, on Slow Down Sunday, we'll zoom all the way out.
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: We will look at how giants, even the hardest, biggest ones, become part of a bigger victory story when we learn to slow down and see things with perspective.
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining me this entire week on Facing Giants.
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: Very important that we have this conversation with each other.
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: I'm so glad I had the privilege to have it with you and I believe in you.
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: I really do, if you're listening to this.
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: I believe in you.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: I know you've got this, I know you do.
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: So I challenge you make sure you take that five minutes to take care of yourself, to do the deep breathing, to sit with yourself, to trust what's in you, so that you're ready to take on this giant, refreshed love and blessings.
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: See you tomorrow.