Latest / Notes to Her / Note 28: You Are the 1, Not the 2 — Stop Acting Like You’re Replaceable

Transcript

Note 28: You Are the 1, Not the 2 — Stop Acting Like You’re Replaceable · Notes to Her

• 0:19
  Hey,
• 0:19
  girl.
• 0:19
  Hey.
• 0:20
  Welcome
• 0:20
  back
• 0:20
  to
• 0:20
  Notes
• 0:21
  to
• 0:21
  her,
• 0:21
  the
• 0:21
  daily
• 0:21
  pep
• 0:22
  talk.
• 0:22
  I'm
• 0:22
  Yaya
• 0:23
  your
• 0:23
  confidence
• 0:23
  in
• 0:24
  mindset
• 0:24
  hoes.
• 0:24
  Here
• 0:25
  to
• 0:25
  help
• 0:25
  you
• 0:25
  stop
• 0:25
  settling.
• 0:26
  Stop.
• 0:26
  Stop
• 0:26
  shrinking,
• 0:27
  and
• 0:27
  finally
• 0:28
  show
• 0:28
  up
• 0:28
  like
• 0:28
  the
• 0:28
  woman
• 0:29
  that
• 0:29
  you
• 0:29
  were
• 0:29
  always
• 0:29
  meant
• 0:30
  to
• 0:30
  be.
• 0:31
  Now,
• 0:31
  today's
• 0:31
  note.
• 0:32
  Oh,
• 0:32
  this
• 0:32
  one
• 0:33
  comes
• 0:33
  straight
• 0:33
  from
• 0:33
  the
• 0:34
  conversations
• 0:34
  that
• 0:34
  I've
• 0:35
  been
• 0:35
  having
• 0:35
  with
• 0:35
  my
• 0:35
  girls
• 0:36
  lately.
• 0:37
  Conversations
• 0:38
  about
• 0:38
  love
• 0:39
  worth
• 0:40
  settling,
• 0:41
  and
• 0:41
  the
• 0:41
  way
• 0:41
  women
• 0:42
  bend
• 0:42
  themselves
• 0:42
  for
• 0:43
  partners
• 0:43
  who
• 0:43
  wouldn't
• 0:44
  even
• 0:44
  bend
• 0:44
  an
• 0:44
  inch
• 0:45
  for
• 0:45
  them.
• 0:45
  And
• 0:46
  I
• 0:46
  felt
• 0:46
  like
• 0:46
  you
• 0:47
  needed
• 0:47
  this
• 0:47
  message
• 0:47
  too,
• 0:48
  because
• 0:48
  I've
• 0:48
  been
• 0:48
  seeing
• 0:49
  a
• 0:49
  lot
• 0:49
  of
• 0:49
  women
• 0:50
  acting
• 0:50
  out
• 0:51
  in
• 0:51
  desperation
• 0:52
  and.
• 0:52
  And
• 0:52
  giving
• 0:53
  their
• 0:53
  all
• 0:53
  when
• 0:53
  it's
• 0:54
  really
• 0:54
  undeserving.
• 0:56
  Now,
• 0:56
  the
• 0:56
  funny
• 0:57
  thing
• 0:57
  is,
• 0:57
  I
• 0:57
  actually
• 0:57
  recorded
• 0:58
  this
• 0:58
  episode
• 0:59
  two
• 0:59
  weeks
• 0:59
  ago,
• 0:59
  but
• 1:00
  I
• 1:00
  had
• 1:00
  to
• 1:00
  come
• 1:00
  back
• 1:00
  and
• 1:01
  rerecord
• 1:01
  it
• 1:02
  because
• 1:02
  the
• 1:02
  conversations
• 1:02
  that
• 1:03
  I
• 1:03
  was
• 1:03
  having
• 1:03
  was
• 1:03
  getting
• 1:04
  so
• 1:04
  good.
• 1:05
  There
• 1:05
  was
• 1:05
  more
• 1:05
  that
• 1:06
  I
• 1:06
  wanted
• 1:06
  to
• 1:06
  add
• 1:06
  to
• 1:07
  this
• 1:07
  note
• 1:08
  because
• 1:08
  before
• 1:08
  you
• 1:08
  give
• 1:09
  your
• 1:09
  heart,
• 1:10
  your
• 1:10
  energy,
• 1:11
  and
• 1:11
  your
• 1:11
  loyalty
• 1:12
  to
• 1:12
  somebody,
• 1:13
  you
• 1:13
  really
• 1:13
  need
• 1:14
  to
• 1:14
  remember
• 1:14
  who
• 1:14
  you
• 1:15
  are.
• 1:15
  So
• 1:16
  this
• 1:16
  note
• 1:16
  is
• 1:16
  about
• 1:17
  knowing
• 1:17
  your
• 1:17
  place
• 1:18
  in
• 1:18
  your
• 1:18
  own
• 1:19
  life
• 1:19
  and
• 1:20
  refusing
• 1:20
  to
• 1:20
  be
• 1:21
  anybody's
• 1:22
  backup
• 1:22
  plan.
• 1:32
  Now,
• 1:32
  before
• 1:33
  we
• 1:33
  really
• 1:33
  get
• 1:33
  into
• 1:33
  it,
• 1:34
  I
• 1:34
  need
• 1:34
  you
• 1:34
  to
• 1:34
  do
• 1:34
  something
• 1:35
  for
• 1:35
  me.
• 1:36
  If
• 1:36
  you're
• 1:36
  multitasking
• 1:37
  right
• 1:37
  now,
• 1:38
  cooking,
• 1:39
  driving.
• 1:39
  Okay,
• 1:40
  maybe
• 1:40
  not
• 1:40
  driving,
• 1:40
  because
• 1:41
  I
• 1:41
  need
• 1:41
  you
• 1:41
  to
• 1:41
  focus
• 1:41
  on
• 1:41
  the
• 1:41
  road
• 1:42
  and
• 1:42
  be
• 1:42
  safe.
• 1:43
  But
• 1:43
  if
• 1:43
  you're
• 1:43
  folding
• 1:44
  laundry,
• 1:45
  scrolling,
• 1:46
  half
• 1:46
  listening,
• 1:47
  I
• 1:47
  want
• 1:48
  you
• 1:48
  to
• 1:48
  pause,
• 1:49
  sit
• 1:49
  down
• 1:49
  if
• 1:50
  you
• 1:50
  can,
• 1:51
  unclench
• 1:51
  your
• 1:51
  jaw,
• 1:53
  take
• 1:53
  a
• 1:53
  deep
• 1:53
  breath,
• 1:54
  and
• 1:55
  then
• 1:55
  let
• 1:55
  out
• 1:55
  a
• 1:55
  good
• 1:56
  sigh
• 1:58
  and
• 1:58
  give
• 1:58
  me
• 1:58
  the
• 1:59
  next
• 1:59
  12
• 1:59
  to
• 1:59
  13
• 2:00
  minutes
• 2:00
  of
• 2:00
  your
• 2:00
  full,
• 2:01
  undivided
• 2:01
  attention.
• 2:02
  This
• 2:03
  one
• 2:03
  is
• 2:03
  a
• 2:03
  little
• 2:03
  bit
• 2:04
  longer
• 2:04
  than
• 2:04
  the
• 2:04
  others
• 2:05
  because
• 2:05
  this
• 2:05
  is
• 2:06
  not
• 2:06
  a
• 2:06
  play
• 2:06
  in
• 2:07
  the
• 2:07
  background
• 2:07
  or
• 2:07
  listen
• 2:08
  while
• 2:08
  you
• 2:08
  scroll
• 2:09
  kind
• 2:09
  of
• 2:09
  note.
• 2:10
  This
• 2:10
  is
• 2:10
  a
• 2:11
  real
• 2:11
  conversation.
• 2:12
  The
• 2:12
  con
• 2:12
  you
• 2:13
  have
• 2:13
  with
• 2:13
  your
• 2:13
  closest
• 2:13
  friend
• 2:14
  when
• 2:14
  she
• 2:14
  looks
• 2:14
  you
• 2:14
  dead
• 2:15
  in
• 2:15
  the
• 2:15
  eyes
• 2:15
  and
• 2:15
  says,
• 2:16
  I
• 2:17
  love
• 2:17
  you
• 2:17
  too
• 2:17
  much
• 2:17
  to
• 2:18
  keep
• 2:18
  letting
• 2:18
  you
• 2:18
  do
• 2:18
  this
• 2:18
  to
• 2:19
  yourself.
• 2:20
  We're
• 2:20
  about
• 2:20
  to
• 2:21
  talk
• 2:21
  about
• 2:21
  the
• 2:21
  energy
• 2:21
  that
• 2:22
  you
• 2:22
  are
• 2:22
  not
• 2:22
  taking
• 2:22
  into
• 2:23
  the
• 2:23
  new
• 2:23
  year
• 2:24
  because
• 2:24
  you
• 2:24
  cannot
• 2:24
  carry
• 2:25
  the
• 2:25
  same
• 2:25
  standards,
• 2:26
  the
• 2:26
  same
• 2:26
  excuses,
• 2:27
  the
• 2:27
  same
• 2:27
  self
• 2:28
  abandonment
• 2:28
  into
• 2:29
  a
• 2:29
  new
• 2:29
  chapter
• 2:29
  and
• 2:30
  expect
• 2:30
  a
• 2:30
  different
• 2:31
  life.
• 2:32
  And
• 2:32
  if
• 2:32
  that
• 2:32
  makes
• 2:33
  you
• 2:33
  uncomfortable
• 2:33
  already,
• 2:34
  that's
• 2:34
  okay,
• 2:35
  because
• 2:35
  growth
• 2:35
  usually
• 2:36
  is.
• 2:39
  Now,
• 2:39
  before
• 2:39
  we
• 2:40
  go
• 2:40
  any
• 2:40
  further,
• 2:40
  I
• 2:41
  want
• 2:41
  to
• 2:41
  say
• 2:41
  this
• 2:41
  note
• 2:42
  is
• 2:42
  not
• 2:42
  about
• 2:43
  shaming
• 2:43
  you.
• 2:44
  It's
• 2:44
  not
• 2:44
  about
• 2:44
  blaming
• 2:45
  you
• 2:45
  for
• 2:45
  your
• 2:45
  past
• 2:46
  choices.
• 2:46
  It's
• 2:46
  not
• 2:47
  about
• 2:47
  making
• 2:47
  you
• 2:47
  feel
• 2:48
  behind
• 2:48
  or
• 2:48
  foolish.
• 2:49
  If
• 2:50
  you
• 2:50
  love
• 2:50
  deeply,
• 2:51
  that
• 2:51
  doesn't
• 2:51
  make
• 2:51
  you
• 2:52
  weak.
• 2:52
  If
• 2:53
  you
• 2:53
  want
• 2:53
  partnership,
• 2:54
  that
• 2:54
  doesn't
• 2:54
  make
• 2:55
  you
• 2:55
  desperate.
• 2:56
  And
• 2:56
  if
• 2:56
  you've
• 2:56
  stayed
• 2:57
  too
• 2:57
  long
• 2:57
  before,
• 2:58
  that
• 2:58
  doesn't
• 2:58
  make
• 2:59
  you
• 2:59
  stupid.
• 3:00
  It
• 3:00
  just
• 3:00
  makes
• 3:00
  you
• 3:00
  human.
• 3:02
  But
• 3:02
  loving
• 3:02
  hard
• 3:03
  without
• 3:03
  boundaries
• 3:04
  will
• 3:04
  drain
• 3:04
  you.
• 3:05
  And
• 3:06
  wanting
• 3:06
  love
• 3:06
  without
• 3:07
  self
• 3:07
  worth
• 3:08
  will
• 3:08
  cost
• 3:09
  you.
• 3:10
  So
• 3:10
  I'm
• 3:10
  here
• 3:10
  to
• 3:11
  remind
• 3:11
  you
• 3:11
  about
• 3:11
  loving
• 3:12
  yourself
• 3:12
  enough
• 3:13
  to
• 3:13
  stop
• 3:13
  settling.
• 3:15
  It's
• 3:15
  about
• 3:15
  deciding
• 3:16
  right
• 3:16
  now
• 3:16
  that
• 3:17
  you
• 3:17
  are
• 3:17
  no
• 3:17
  longer
• 3:18
  available
• 3:18
  for
• 3:18
  relationships,
• 3:19
  situationships
• 3:21
  or
• 3:21
  dynamics
• 3:22
  that
• 3:22
  drain
• 3:22
  you,
• 3:23
  confuse
• 3:23
  you,
• 3:24
  or
• 3:24
  make
• 3:24
  you
• 3:25
  question
• 3:25
  your
• 3:25
  worth.
• 3:27
  You
• 3:27
  don't
• 3:27
  have
• 3:27
  to
• 3:27
  have
• 3:27
  it
• 3:28
  all
• 3:28
  figured
• 3:28
  out.
• 3:29
  You
• 3:29
  don't
• 3:29
  have
• 3:29
  to
• 3:29
  know
• 3:30
  who
• 3:30
  you're
• 3:30
  becoming
• 3:30
  yet.
• 3:32
  But
• 3:32
  you
• 3:32
  do
• 3:32
  have
• 3:32
  to
• 3:33
  decide
• 3:33
  what
• 3:34
  you're
• 3:34
  done
• 3:34
  tolerating.
• 3:37
  Now,
• 3:37
  what
• 3:37
  I
• 3:37
  say
• 3:37
  next
• 3:38
  might
• 3:38
  sting
• 3:38
  you
• 3:38
  a
• 3:39
  little
• 3:39
  bit,
• 3:39
  but
• 3:39
  it's
• 3:39
  said
• 3:39
  with
• 3:40
  love.
• 3:41
  I
• 3:41
  see
• 3:41
  a
• 3:42
  lot
• 3:42
  of
• 3:42
  women
• 3:43
  who
• 3:43
  are
• 3:43
  forgetting
• 3:44
  who
• 3:45
  they
• 3:45
  are
• 3:45
  lately.
• 3:46
  Forgetting
• 3:46
  their
• 3:47
  worth,
• 3:47
  forgetting
• 3:48
  their
• 3:48
  value.
• 3:49
  And
• 3:49
  a
• 3:49
  lot
• 3:49
  of
• 3:50
  that
• 3:50
  comes
• 3:50
  from
• 3:50
  low
• 3:51
  self
• 3:51
  esteem
• 3:51
  and
• 3:52
  shaky
• 3:52
  confidence.
• 3:53
  Even
• 3:54
  when
• 3:54
  it
• 3:54
  looks
• 3:54
  like
• 3:55
  they
• 3:55
  have
• 3:55
  it
• 3:55
  all
• 3:55
  together,
• 3:57
  they
• 3:57
  start
• 3:57
  believing
• 3:58
  a
• 3:58
  man
• 3:58
  has
• 3:58
  to
• 3:58
  choose
• 3:59
  them
• 3:59
  for
• 3:59
  them
• 4:00
  to
• 4:00
  feel
• 4:00
  worthy.
• 4:01
  They
• 4:01
  lower
• 4:02
  their
• 4:02
  standards
• 4:03
  just
• 4:03
  to
• 4:03
  keep
• 4:03
  someone
• 4:04
  who
• 4:04
  barely
• 4:05
  shows
• 4:05
  up.
• 4:06
  They
• 4:07
  accept
• 4:07
  crumbs
• 4:08
  because
• 4:08
  rejection
• 4:09
  feels
• 4:09
  scarier
• 4:09
  than
• 4:10
  loneliness.
• 4:12
  And
• 4:12
  before
• 4:12
  you
• 4:12
  think
• 4:13
  that's
• 4:13
  not
• 4:13
  me,
• 4:14
  let
• 4:14
  me
• 4:15
  be
• 4:15
  honest
• 4:15
  with
• 4:15
  you.
• 4:16
  I
• 4:17
  love
• 4:17
  hard.
• 4:19
  I
• 4:19
  used
• 4:20
  to
• 4:20
  believe
• 4:20
  that
• 4:20
  if
• 4:20
  I
• 4:20
  love
• 4:21
  somebody
• 4:21
  deeply
• 4:21
  enough,
• 4:22
  if
• 4:22
  I
• 4:23
  showed
• 4:23
  up
• 4:23
  enough,
• 4:24
  if
• 4:24
  I
• 4:24
  was
• 4:24
  patient
• 4:25
  enough,
• 4:25
  forgiving
• 4:26
  enough,
• 4:27
  understanding
• 4:27
  enough,
• 4:28
  he
• 4:28
  would
• 4:29
  finally
• 4:29
  see
• 4:29
  how
• 4:29
  worthy
• 4:30
  I
• 4:30
  was
• 4:31
  and
• 4:31
  step
• 4:31
  up
• 4:32
  to
• 4:32
  be
• 4:32
  the
• 4:32
  man
• 4:32
  that
• 4:32
  I
• 4:32
  needed
• 4:33
  him
• 4:33
  to
• 4:33
  be.
• 4:34
  I
• 4:34
  thought
• 4:34
  that
• 4:35
  love
• 4:35
  was
• 4:35
  something
• 4:35
  that
• 4:35
  you
• 4:35
  had
• 4:36
  to
• 4:36
  earn,
• 4:36
  something
• 4:37
  that
• 4:37
  you
• 4:37
  had
• 4:37
  to
• 4:37
  prove.
• 4:40
  But
• 4:40
  here's
• 4:40
  what
• 4:40
  I
• 4:40
  learned
• 4:41
  the
• 4:41
  hard
• 4:41
  way.
• 4:42
  Loving
• 4:42
  someone
• 4:43
  else
• 4:43
  harder
• 4:43
  does
• 4:44
  not
• 4:44
  fix
• 4:45
  anything.
• 4:46
  It
• 4:47
  taught
• 4:47
  me
• 4:47
  how
• 4:47
  much
• 4:48
  I
• 4:48
  was
• 4:49
  willing
• 4:49
  to
• 4:49
  abandon
• 4:50
  myself
• 4:50
  to
• 4:50
  keep
• 4:51
  someone.
• 4:52
  And
• 4:53
  when
• 4:53
  I
• 4:53
  truly
• 4:54
  learned
• 4:54
  to
• 4:54
  love
• 4:54
  myself,
• 4:55
  I
• 4:55
  learned
• 4:56
  how
• 4:56
  to
• 4:56
  set
• 4:56
  boundaries.
• 4:57
  And
• 4:58
  once
• 4:58
  I
• 4:58
  had
• 4:58
  boundaries,
• 4:59
  everything
• 4:59
  became
• 5:00
  clear.
• 5:01
  If
• 5:01
  a
• 5:02
  man
• 5:02
  couldn't
• 5:02
  treat
• 5:03
  me
• 5:03
  the
• 5:03
  way
• 5:03
  that
• 5:03
  I
• 5:04
  deserved,
• 5:04
  he
• 5:04
  could
• 5:05
  not
• 5:05
  be
• 5:05
  my
• 5:05
  man.
• 5:06
  Not
• 5:07
  because
• 5:07
  I
• 5:07
  love
• 5:07
  deeply,
• 5:08
  not
• 5:08
  because
• 5:08
  I'm
• 5:09
  cold
• 5:09
  or
• 5:09
  guarded,
• 5:10
  but
• 5:10
  because
• 5:10
  I
• 5:11
  refuse
• 5:11
  to
• 5:11
  make
• 5:11
  space
• 5:12
  for
• 5:12
  someone
• 5:12
  who
• 5:13
  only
• 5:13
  shows
• 5:13
  up
• 5:13
  halfway.
• 5:15
  And
• 5:15
  if
• 5:15
  someone
• 5:15
  can't
• 5:16
  treat
• 5:16
  you
• 5:16
  the
• 5:16
  way
• 5:16
  that
• 5:16
  you
• 5:17
  deserve,
• 5:17
  they
• 5:18
  shouldn't
• 5:18
  get
• 5:18
  access
• 5:18
  to
• 5:19
  you.
• 5:19
  Period.
• 5:22
  So
• 5:22
  you
• 5:22
  might
• 5:22
  be
• 5:22
  asking,
• 5:22
  why
• 5:23
  does
• 5:23
  this
• 5:23
  cycle
• 5:23
  happen
• 5:24
  so
• 5:24
  much?
• 5:25
  First,
• 5:26
  you've
• 5:26
  probably
• 5:27
  been
• 5:27
  taught
• 5:27
  to
• 5:27
  prove
• 5:28
  that
• 5:28
  you're
• 5:28
  worthy.
• 5:29
  Be
• 5:29
  agreeable,
• 5:30
  be
• 5:31
  patient,
• 5:32
  Be
• 5:32
  understanding.
• 5:33
  Be
• 5:33
  right
• 5:33
  or
• 5:34
  die.
• 5:34
  Meanwhile,
• 5:35
  who's
• 5:35
  writing
• 5:36
  for
• 5:36
  you?
• 5:38
  Now?
• 5:38
  This
• 5:38
  next
• 5:39
  one
• 5:39
  I
• 5:39
  also
• 5:39
  see
• 5:40
  a
• 5:40
  lot.
• 5:42
  Women
• 5:42
  confuse
• 5:43
  attention
• 5:44
  with
• 5:44
  affection.
• 5:45
  And
• 5:46
  this
• 5:46
  one
• 5:46
  runs
• 5:47
  deep.
• 5:48
  Because
• 5:48
  when
• 5:48
  you've
• 5:49
  gone
• 5:49
  years
• 5:49
  without
• 5:50
  feeling
• 5:51
  truly
• 5:51
  seen,
• 5:53
  when
• 5:53
  you've
• 5:53
  been
• 5:54
  emotionally
• 5:54
  neglected
• 5:55
  in
• 5:55
  childhood
• 5:56
  or
• 5:56
  past
• 5:56
  relationships,
• 5:58
  when
• 5:58
  you're
• 5:59
  used
• 5:59
  to
• 5:59
  crumbs,
• 6:00
  the
• 6:00
  bare
• 6:01
  minimum
• 6:01
  can
• 6:02
  feel
• 6:02
  like
• 6:02
  a
• 6:02
  feast.
• 6:04
  Well,
• 6:04
  let
• 6:04
  me
• 6:04
  be
• 6:05
  real
• 6:05
  with
• 6:05
  you.
• 6:05
  A
• 6:06
  good
• 6:06
  morning
• 6:06
  text
• 6:06
  should
• 6:07
  not
• 6:07
  feel
• 6:07
  like
• 6:08
  a
• 6:08
  miracle.
• 6:09
  When
• 6:09
  you've
• 6:10
  been
• 6:10
  emotionally
• 6:11
  starving,
• 6:12
  anything
• 6:12
  looks
• 6:12
  like
• 6:13
  a
• 6:13
  meal.
• 6:15
  Third,
• 6:16
  you
• 6:16
  start
• 6:16
  believing
• 6:17
  that
• 6:17
  being
• 6:17
  chosen
• 6:18
  is
• 6:18
  the
• 6:18
  prize,
• 6:19
  but
• 6:20
  choosing
• 6:20
  yourself
• 6:21
  will
• 6:21
  always
• 6:22
  be
• 6:22
  the
• 6:23
  real
• 6:23
  flex.
• 6:24
  Now,
• 6:24
  I'm
• 6:25
  not
• 6:25
  telling
• 6:25
  you
• 6:25
  to
• 6:25
  be
• 6:25
  single
• 6:25
  forever.
• 6:26
  That
• 6:26
  is
• 6:26
  not
• 6:26
  the
• 6:27
  assignment.
• 6:27
  Because
• 6:27
  most
• 6:28
  of
• 6:28
  us
• 6:28
  want
• 6:28
  partnership.
• 6:30
  But
• 6:30
  choose
• 6:30
  a
• 6:30
  partner
• 6:31
  who
• 6:31
  treats
• 6:31
  you
• 6:31
  like
• 6:31
  a
• 6:32
  queen.
• 6:33
  Someone
• 6:33
  who
• 6:33
  cherishes
• 6:34
  you,
• 6:35
  someone
• 6:35
  who
• 6:35
  invests
• 6:36
  in
• 6:36
  you,
• 6:36
  someone
• 6:37
  who
• 6:37
  actually
• 6:37
  wants
• 6:37
  to
• 6:38
  learn
• 6:38
  you
• 6:38
  and
• 6:38
  continue
• 6:39
  doing
• 6:40
  it.
• 6:41
  Now,
• 6:41
  I
• 6:41
  saw
• 6:41
  a
• 6:41
  thread
• 6:42
  recently
• 6:42
  that
• 6:42
  warms
• 6:43
  my
• 6:43
  heart,
• 6:43
  and
• 6:44
  it
• 6:44
  was
• 6:44
  about
• 6:44
  people,
• 6:44
  men
• 6:45
  and
• 6:45
  women,
• 6:45
  sharing
• 6:45
  notes
• 6:46
  that
• 6:46
  they
• 6:46
  kept
• 6:46
  in
• 6:46
  their
• 6:46
  phone
• 6:47
  of
• 6:47
  their
• 6:47
  partners
• 6:48
  for
• 6:48
  their
• 6:48
  partners,
• 6:49
  likes
• 6:49
  and
• 6:49
  dislikes,
• 6:50
  allergies,
• 6:50
  favorite
• 6:51
  foods,
• 6:51
  places
• 6:52
  to
• 6:52
  go.
• 6:53
  Like
• 6:53
  that
• 6:54
  is
• 6:54
  true
• 6:55
  effort.
• 6:56
  So
• 6:56
  do
• 6:56
  not
• 6:57
  settle
• 6:57
  for
• 6:57
  scraps
• 6:58
  just
• 6:58
  for
• 6:58
  the
• 6:58
  sake
• 6:58
  of
• 6:58
  being
• 6:59
  alone.
• 7:01
  Because,
• 7:01
  listen,
• 7:02
  you
• 7:02
  can
• 7:02
  be
• 7:02
  miserable
• 7:03
  by
• 7:03
  yourself,
• 7:04
  but
• 7:04
  being
• 7:04
  miserable
• 7:05
  with
• 7:05
  somebody
• 7:06
  else
• 7:06
  is
• 7:06
  10
• 7:07
  times
• 7:08
  worse.
• 7:10
  Now,
• 7:10
  the
• 7:10
  last
• 7:11
  thing
• 7:11
  you
• 7:11
  might
• 7:11
  be
• 7:11
  saying
• 7:11
  is,
• 7:12
  well,
• 7:12
  I'm
• 7:12
  scared
• 7:13
  because
• 7:13
  if
• 7:13
  I
• 7:13
  walk
• 7:13
  away,
• 7:14
  that
• 7:14
  means
• 7:14
  that
• 7:14
  I'm
• 7:14
  starting
• 7:15
  over.
• 7:16
  Starting
• 7:16
  over
• 7:17
  is
• 7:17
  scary.
• 7:17
  I'm
• 7:17
  not
• 7:17
  even
• 7:18
  gonna
• 7:18
  lie
• 7:18
  to
• 7:18
  you
• 7:18
  about
• 7:18
  that.
• 7:19
  But
• 7:19
  being
• 7:19
  at
• 7:20
  war
• 7:20
  with
• 7:20
  someone
• 7:20
  who
• 7:21
  claims
• 7:21
  to
• 7:22
  love
• 7:22
  you,
• 7:23
  that
• 7:23
  will
• 7:24
  destroy
• 7:24
  your
• 7:24
  peace,
• 7:25
  your
• 7:25
  mental
• 7:26
  health,
• 7:27
  your
• 7:27
  confidence,
• 7:29
  and
• 7:29
  your
• 7:29
  spirit.
• 7:31
  And
• 7:31
  the
• 7:31
  crazy
• 7:31
  thing
• 7:31
  is,
• 7:32
  you
• 7:32
  may
• 7:32
  not
• 7:32
  even
• 7:33
  realize
• 7:33
  it,
• 7:34
  but
• 7:35
  starting
• 7:35
  over
• 7:35
  with
• 7:36
  your
• 7:36
  self
• 7:36
  respect
• 7:37
  intact
• 7:38
  is
• 7:39
  always
• 7:39
  better
• 7:39
  than
• 7:40
  staying
• 7:40
  with
• 7:40
  someone
• 7:41
  who
• 7:41
  chips
• 7:41
  it
• 7:42
  away.
• 7:43
  Trust
• 7:43
  me
• 7:43
  on
• 7:43
  this
• 7:44
  one.
• 7:46
  Based
• 7:46
  on
• 7:47
  conversations
• 7:47
  that
• 7:47
  I've
• 7:48
  had
• 7:48
  with
• 7:48
  clients,
• 7:49
  friends,
• 7:49
  and
• 7:49
  women
• 7:50
  that
• 7:50
  I've
• 7:50
  mentored,
• 7:51
  here's
• 7:51
  what
• 7:51
  I
• 7:51
  see.
• 7:53
  Women
• 7:53
  aren't
• 7:53
  settling
• 7:54
  because
• 7:54
  they
• 7:54
  don't
• 7:55
  know
• 7:55
  better.
• 7:55
  They're
• 7:56
  settling
• 7:56
  because
• 7:56
  they
• 7:57
  hope
• 7:57
  better
• 7:57
  will
• 7:58
  come
• 7:58
  from
• 7:58
  the
• 7:58
  person
• 7:58
  they've
• 7:59
  chosen.
• 8:00
  Some
• 8:01
  feel
• 8:01
  like
• 8:01
  their
• 8:01
  time
• 8:02
  is
• 8:02
  running
• 8:02
  out.
• 8:03
  Some
• 8:03
  feel
• 8:03
  like,
• 8:04
  well,
• 8:04
  this
• 8:04
  is
• 8:04
  the
• 8:04
  best
• 8:05
  that
• 8:05
  I
• 8:05
  can
• 8:05
  do.
• 8:06
  Some
• 8:07
  feel
• 8:07
  like
• 8:07
  they
• 8:07
  should
• 8:07
  be
• 8:08
  grateful
• 8:08
  that
• 8:08
  someone
• 8:09
  wants
• 8:09
  them
• 8:09
  at
• 8:10
  all.
• 8:11
  And
• 8:11
  that
• 8:12
  right
• 8:12
  there,
• 8:13
  that
• 8:13
  is
• 8:13
  the
• 8:14
  womb.
• 8:15
  I
• 8:15
  see
• 8:16
  women
• 8:16
  pour
• 8:16
  into
• 8:16
  men
• 8:17
  who
• 8:17
  gave
• 8:17
  them
• 8:18
  half
• 8:18
  effort,
• 8:19
  give
• 8:20
  loyalty
• 8:20
  to
• 8:20
  men
• 8:20
  who
• 8:21
  couldn't
• 8:21
  even
• 8:21
  spell
• 8:22
  commitments,
• 8:23
  and
• 8:24
  build
• 8:24
  with
• 8:24
  men
• 8:24
  who
• 8:25
  weren't
• 8:25
  even
• 8:25
  building
• 8:26
  themselves.
• 8:27
  And
• 8:28
  every
• 8:28
  time
• 8:28
  the
• 8:28
  woman
• 8:29
  says,
• 8:29
  I
• 8:30
  just
• 8:30
  thought
• 8:30
  if
• 8:30
  I
• 8:30
  loved
• 8:30
  him
• 8:31
  harder,
• 8:31
  he'd
• 8:31
  love
• 8:32
  me
• 8:32
  better.
• 8:34
  Girl,
• 8:34
  listen.
• 8:35
  Loving
• 8:36
  someone
• 8:36
  harder
• 8:37
  does
• 8:37
  not
• 8:37
  heal
• 8:38
  what
• 8:38
  they
• 8:38
  refuse
• 8:39
  to
• 8:39
  fix.
• 8:41
  It
• 8:41
  does
• 8:41
  not
• 8:41
  make
• 8:42
  a
• 8:42
  broken
• 8:42
  man
• 8:42
  whole.
• 8:43
  It
• 8:44
  does
• 8:44
  not
• 8:44
  make
• 8:44
  a
• 8:44
  detached
• 8:45
  man
• 8:45
  present.
• 8:47
  And
• 8:47
  it
• 8:47
  does
• 8:47
  not
• 8:47
  make
• 8:47
  an
• 8:48
  inconsistent
• 8:48
  man
• 8:49
  consistent.
• 8:51
  Your
• 8:51
  love
• 8:51
  doesn't
• 8:52
  cure
• 8:52
  wounds.
• 8:52
  Someone
• 8:53
  refuses
• 8:53
  to
• 8:53
  acknowledge.
• 8:55
  And
• 8:55
  then
• 8:55
  there's
• 8:55
  that
• 8:55
  woman
• 8:56
  that
• 8:56
  convinces
• 8:56
  herself,
• 8:57
  well,
• 8:57
  at
• 8:57
  least
• 8:57
  he
• 8:58
  talks
• 8:58
  to
• 8:58
  me.
• 8:58
  At
• 8:58
  least
• 8:58
  he
• 8:59
  comes
• 8:59
  back.
• 9:00
  Sis.
• 9:01
  Crumbs
• 9:02
  are
• 9:02
  Not
• 9:02
  a
• 9:02
  meal.
• 9:03
  You
• 9:03
  deserve
• 9:04
  consistency.
• 9:05
  You
• 9:05
  deserve
• 9:06
  clarity.
• 9:07
  You
• 9:07
  deserve
• 9:08
  reciprocity.
• 9:10
  You
• 9:10
  deserve
• 9:10
  someone
• 9:11
  who
• 9:11
  chooses
• 9:11
  you
• 9:12
  without
• 9:13
  hesitation.
• 9:14
  And
• 9:14
  if
• 9:14
  he
• 9:14
  can't
• 9:14
  do
• 9:15
  that,
• 9:15
  he
• 9:16
  has
• 9:16
  already
• 9:16
  shown
• 9:17
  you
• 9:17
  his
• 9:17
  capacity.
• 9:18
  So
• 9:18
  believe
• 9:18
  him.
• 9:20
  Though
• 9:21
  somewhere
• 9:21
  deep
• 9:21
  down,
• 9:22
  there's
• 9:22
  a
• 9:22
  part
• 9:22
  of
• 9:22
  you
• 9:23
  that
• 9:23
  doesn't
• 9:23
  fully
• 9:23
  believe
• 9:24
  that
• 9:24
  you
• 9:24
  are
• 9:24
  the
• 9:24
  prize.
• 9:25
  There's
• 9:26
  a
• 9:26
  part
• 9:26
  of
• 9:26
  you
• 9:26
  that
• 9:26
  thinks
• 9:27
  that
• 9:27
  love
• 9:27
  has
• 9:27
  to
• 9:28
  be
• 9:28
  earned.
• 9:29
  Where
• 9:29
  does
• 9:30
  that
• 9:30
  come
• 9:30
  from?
• 9:31
  Maybe
• 9:31
  the
• 9:31
  woman
• 9:32
  who
• 9:32
  raised
• 9:33
  you
• 9:33
  stayed
• 9:33
  with
• 9:34
  men
• 9:34
  who
• 9:34
  treated
• 9:34
  them
• 9:34
  badly.
• 9:35
  Maybe
• 9:36
  you
• 9:36
  watched
• 9:36
  your
• 9:36
  mother
• 9:36
  or
• 9:37
  grandmother
• 9:37
  make
• 9:37
  themselves
• 9:38
  feel
• 9:38
  small.
• 9:39
  Maybe
• 9:40
  you
• 9:40
  were
• 9:40
  taught
• 9:40
  to
• 9:41
  sacrifice
• 9:42
  and
• 9:42
  survive,
• 9:44
  to
• 9:44
  be
• 9:44
  strong,
• 9:45
  to
• 9:45
  hold
• 9:45
  everything
• 9:46
  together.
• 9:47
  Maybe
• 9:47
  you
• 9:47
  grew
• 9:48
  up
• 9:48
  seeing
• 9:48
  women
• 9:48
  love
• 9:49
  men
• 9:49
  who
• 9:49
  didn't
• 9:50
  love
• 9:50
  them
• 9:50
  the
• 9:50
  same.
• 9:52
  And
• 9:52
  whether
• 9:52
  you
• 9:52
  realized
• 9:53
  it
• 9:53
  or
• 9:53
  not,
• 9:53
  you
• 9:54
  learned.
• 9:55
  Loving
• 9:55
  means
• 9:55
  proving
• 9:56
  myself.
• 9:57
  Loving
• 9:57
  means
• 9:58
  surviving
• 9:59
  pain.
• 10:00
  Loving
• 10:00
  means
• 10:00
  staying
• 10:01
  even
• 10:01
  when
• 10:01
  it
• 10:02
  hurts.
• 10:03
  But
• 10:03
  please
• 10:04
  hear
• 10:04
  me
• 10:04
  clearly
• 10:04
  when
• 10:05
  I
• 10:05
  say
• 10:05
  this.
• 10:06
  Healthy
• 10:07
  love
• 10:07
  is
• 10:07
  not
• 10:07
  earned.
• 10:08
  Healthy
• 10:09
  love
• 10:09
  is
• 10:09
  received.
• 10:11
  And
• 10:11
  here's
• 10:12
  a
• 10:12
  plot
• 10:12
  twist.
• 10:12
  If
• 10:13
  a
• 10:13
  boundary
• 10:14
  makes
• 10:14
  someone
• 10:14
  leave,
• 10:15
  that's
• 10:16
  not
• 10:16
  loss,
• 10:17
  that's
• 10:17
  protection.
• 10:19
  You're
• 10:19
  not
• 10:19
  asking
• 10:19
  too
• 10:20
  much.
• 10:21
  You're
• 10:21
  just
• 10:21
  asking
• 10:22
  the
• 10:22
  wrong
• 10:22
  person.
• 10:24
  Now
• 10:24
  here's
• 10:25
  where
• 10:25
  everything
• 10:25
  shifts
• 10:26
  and
• 10:27
  how
• 10:27
  you
• 10:27
  step
• 10:27
  into
• 10:28
  the
• 10:28
  identity
• 10:28
  of
• 10:28
  a
• 10:29
  woman
• 10:29
  who
• 10:29
  is
• 10:29
  worthy
• 10:30
  of
• 10:30
  healthy,
• 10:31
  steady,
• 10:31
  steady,
• 10:31
  consistent
• 10:32
  love.
• 10:34
  Stop
• 10:35
  auditioning
• 10:35
  for
• 10:35
  roles
• 10:36
  that
• 10:36
  you
• 10:36
  already
• 10:37
  qualify
• 10:37
  for.
• 10:38
  You
• 10:38
  don't
• 10:38
  have
• 10:39
  to
• 10:39
  prove
• 10:39
  your
• 10:39
  partner
• 10:40
  material.
• 10:40
  You
• 10:41
  already
• 10:41
  are.
• 10:42
  The
• 10:42
  right
• 10:42
  man
• 10:43
  will
• 10:43
  see
• 10:43
  that
• 10:43
  without
• 10:44
  you
• 10:44
  performing.
• 10:46
  Stop
• 10:46
  personalizing
• 10:47
  someone
• 10:47
  else's
• 10:48
  lack.
• 10:49
  His
• 10:49
  inconsistency
• 10:50
  is
• 10:50
  not
• 10:50
  about
• 10:51
  your
• 10:51
  worth.
• 10:51
  It's
• 10:52
  about
• 10:52
  his
• 10:52
  capacity.
• 10:54
  Make
• 10:55
  your
• 10:55
  self
• 10:55
  respect
• 10:56
  non
• 10:56
  negotiable.
• 10:58
  If
• 10:58
  something
• 10:58
  costs
• 10:59
  you
• 10:59
  your
• 10:59
  peace,
• 10:59
  your
• 11:00
  self
• 11:00
  esteem,
• 11:00
  your
• 11:01
  identity,
• 11:01
  it's
• 11:02
  too
• 11:02
  expensive.
• 11:02
  Put
• 11:03
  it
• 11:03
  back
• 11:05
  and
• 11:05
  then
• 11:05
  walk
• 11:05
  away.
• 11:06
  The
• 11:06
  first
• 11:06
  time
• 11:07
  your
• 11:07
  soul
• 11:07
  whispers,
• 11:08
  this
• 11:08
  ain't
• 11:08
  it.
• 11:09
  Not
• 11:10
  the
• 11:10
  seventh
• 11:10
  time,
• 11:10
  not
• 11:11
  after
• 11:11
  the
• 11:11
  ninth
• 11:11
  apology,
• 11:12
  not
• 11:12
  after
• 11:12
  the
• 11:13
  third.
• 11:13
  I
• 11:13
  promise
• 11:14
  I
• 11:14
  will
• 11:14
  change.
• 11:15
  Because
• 11:15
  your
• 11:16
  intuition
• 11:16
  never
• 11:17
  lies.
• 11:17
  You
• 11:18
  just
• 11:18
  stop
• 11:18
  listening
• 11:18
  to
• 11:19
  it.
• 11:20
  Now
• 11:21
  one
• 11:21
  more
• 11:21
  thing
• 11:21
  before
• 11:21
  I
• 11:21
  close
• 11:22
  this
• 11:22
  out.
• 11:22
  A
• 11:23
  man
• 11:23
  might
• 11:24
  replace
• 11:24
  your
• 11:24
  presence,
• 11:25
  but
• 11:25
  remember,
• 11:25
  he
• 11:25
  will
• 11:26
  never
• 11:26
  replace
• 11:27
  your
• 11:27
  essence.
• 11:28
  There's
• 11:28
  only
• 11:28
  one
• 11:29
  you.
• 11:29
  There's
• 11:30
  only
• 11:30
  one
• 11:30
  woman
• 11:31
  with
• 11:31
  your
• 11:31
  softness,
• 11:32
  your
• 11:32
  strength,
• 11:32
  your
• 11:33
  spirit,
• 11:33
  your
• 11:34
  mind.
• 11:35
  So
• 11:35
  if
• 11:35
  he
• 11:35
  fumbles
• 11:36
  that,
• 11:36
  that's
• 11:37
  his
• 11:37
  story,
• 11:38
  not
• 11:38
  yours.
• 11:39
  And
• 11:39
  another
• 11:39
  thing.
• 11:40
  A
• 11:40
  man
• 11:40
  being
• 11:40
  interested
• 11:41
  in
• 11:41
  someone
• 11:41
  else
• 11:42
  does
• 11:42
  not
• 11:42
  make
• 11:42
  you
• 11:43
  less.
• 11:43
  It
• 11:44
  just
• 11:44
  means
• 11:44
  that
• 11:44
  he
• 11:44
  was
• 11:44
  never
• 11:45
  your
• 11:45
  equal
• 11:45
  and
• 11:46
  God
• 11:46
  removed
• 11:46
  him
• 11:47
  so
• 11:47
  that
• 11:47
  you
• 11:47
  wouldn't
• 11:47
  have
• 11:47
  to
• 11:47
  shrink
• 11:48
  to
• 11:48
  fit
• 11:48
  someone
• 11:49
  too
• 11:49
  small.
• 11:51
  Now,
• 11:51
  here's
• 11:51
  the
• 11:51
  energy
• 11:52
  that
• 11:52
  I
• 11:52
  want
• 11:52
  you
• 11:52
  to
• 11:52
  carry
• 11:53
  into
• 11:53
  the
• 11:53
  new
• 11:53
  year.
• 11:54
  Remember
• 11:54
  that
• 11:54
  you
• 11:54
  are
• 11:55
  the
• 11:55
  one.
• 11:55
  Not
• 11:56
  the
• 11:56
  two.
• 11:56
  Not
• 11:56
  the
• 11:57
  backup
• 11:57
  plan,
• 11:57
  not
• 11:58
  the
• 11:58
  secret,
• 11:58
  not
• 11:58
  the
• 11:58
  almost,
• 11:59
  not
• 12:00
  the
• 12:00
  option,
• 12:00
  but
• 12:01
  the
• 12:01
  one
• 12:01
  and
• 12:01
  only.
• 12:02
  And
• 12:02
  when
• 12:03
  you
• 12:03
  finally
• 12:03
  start
• 12:03
  living
• 12:04
  your
• 12:04
  life
• 12:04
  like
• 12:04
  that,
• 12:05
  your
• 12:05
  entire
• 12:06
  life
• 12:06
  shifts.
• 12:08
  Remember,
• 12:08
  loving
• 12:08
  yourself
• 12:09
  more
• 12:10
  in
• 12:10
  the
• 12:10
  New
• 12:10
  Year
• 12:10
  does
• 12:11
  not
• 12:11
  mean
• 12:11
  becoming
• 12:12
  cold.
• 12:12
  It
• 12:13
  does
• 12:13
  not
• 12:13
  mean
• 12:13
  shutting
• 12:14
  down
• 12:14
  your
• 12:14
  heart.
• 12:15
  It
• 12:15
  does
• 12:15
  not
• 12:15
  mean
• 12:16
  pretending
• 12:16
  that
• 12:16
  you
• 12:17
  don't
• 12:17
  want
• 12:17
  to
• 12:17
  love,
• 12:18
  partnership
• 12:18
  or
• 12:19
  connection.
• 12:20
  It
• 12:20
  means
• 12:21
  you
• 12:21
  stop
• 12:21
  auditioning
• 12:22
  for
• 12:22
  people
• 12:22
  who
• 12:22
  should
• 12:22
  already
• 12:22
  be
• 12:23
  showing
• 12:23
  up.
• 12:24
  It
• 12:24
  means
• 12:24
  you
• 12:24
  stop
• 12:25
  explaining
• 12:25
  your
• 12:25
  worth.
• 12:26
  It
• 12:26
  means
• 12:26
  you
• 12:26
  stop
• 12:27
  shrinking
• 12:27
  to
• 12:27
  be
• 12:28
  chosen.
• 12:29
  And
• 12:29
  if
• 12:29
  this
• 12:30
  all
• 12:30
  started
• 12:30
  something
• 12:30
  up
• 12:31
  in
• 12:31
  you,
• 12:31
  if
• 12:31
  it
• 12:31
  made
• 12:32
  you
• 12:32
  feel
• 12:32
  seen,
• 12:33
  called
• 12:33
  out,
• 12:34
  emotional,
• 12:34
  or
• 12:35
  quietly
• 12:35
  determined,
• 12:36
  I
• 12:36
  need
• 12:36
  you
• 12:36
  to
• 12:36
  do
• 12:37
  two
• 12:37
  things
• 12:37
  for
• 12:37
  me.
• 12:37
  First,
• 12:38
  make
• 12:38
  sure
• 12:38
  that
• 12:38
  you
• 12:38
  are
• 12:39
  subscribed
• 12:39
  to
• 12:39
  this
• 12:39
  podcast
• 12:40
  because
• 12:40
  the
• 12:40
  next
• 12:40
  two
• 12:41
  notes
• 12:41
  before
• 12:41
  the
• 12:41
  New
• 12:41
  Year,
• 12:42
  they
• 12:42
  are
• 12:43
  a
• 12:43
  must
• 12:43
  hear
• 12:43
  if
• 12:44
  you
• 12:44
  want
• 12:44
  to
• 12:44
  enter
• 12:44
  the
• 12:45
  New
• 12:45
  Year
• 12:45
  with
• 12:45
  confidence.
• 12:46
  Because
• 12:46
  we're
• 12:46
  going
• 12:46
  to
• 12:46
  be
• 12:46
  talking
• 12:47
  about
• 12:47
  reflection,
• 12:48
  identity
• 12:48
  and
• 12:48
  who
• 12:49
  you
• 12:49
  are
• 12:49
  choosing
• 12:49
  to
• 12:49
  be
• 12:50
  moving
• 12:50
  forward
• 12:50
  and
• 12:51
  I
• 12:51
  don't
• 12:51
  want
• 12:51
  you
• 12:51
  to
• 12:51
  miss
• 12:52
  out
• 12:52
  on
• 12:52
  those
• 12:52
  conversations.
• 12:53
  And
• 12:53
  secondly,
• 12:54
  promise
• 12:55
  yourself
• 12:55
  this.
• 12:56
  You
• 12:56
  are
• 12:56
  not
• 12:57
  walking
• 12:57
  into
• 12:57
  the
• 12:57
  New
• 12:57
  Year
• 12:58
  still
• 12:58
  accepting
• 12:58
  less
• 12:58
  than
• 12:59
  you
• 12:59
  deserve.
• 13:00
  Not
• 13:00
  in
• 13:00
  love,
• 13:01
  not
• 13:01
  in
• 13:01
  how
• 13:01
  you're
• 13:02
  treated,
• 13:02
  and
• 13:02
  not
• 13:03
  in
• 13:03
  how
• 13:03
  you
• 13:03
  speak
• 13:03
  to
• 13:03
  yourself.
• 13:04
  This
• 13:05
  year
• 13:05
  may
• 13:05
  not
• 13:05
  have
• 13:05
  gone
• 13:06
  how
• 13:06
  you
• 13:06
  planned,
• 13:06
  but
• 13:06
  the
• 13:07
  next
• 13:07
  one
• 13:07
  will
• 13:07
  not
• 13:08
  be
• 13:08
  built
• 13:08
  on.
• 13:08
  Suddenly
• 13:09
  you
• 13:09
  deserve
• 13:10
  better
• 13:10
  and
• 13:10
  you
• 13:11
  are
• 13:11
  finally
• 13:11
  ready
• 13:12
  to
• 13:12
  demand
• 13:12
  it.
• 13:13
  So
• 13:13
  if
• 13:13
  this
• 13:13
  no
• 13:14
  hit
• 13:14
  home
• 13:14
  for
• 13:14
  you,
• 13:14
  make
• 13:14
  sure
• 13:15
  you
• 13:15
  share
• 13:15
  it
• 13:15
  with
• 13:15
  another
• 13:16
  woman
• 13:16
  who
• 13:16
  needs
• 13:16
  this
• 13:16
  reminder
• 13:17
  too.
• 13:17
  Because
• 13:18
  none
• 13:18
  of
• 13:18
  us
• 13:18
  are
• 13:18
  meant
• 13:18
  to
• 13:18
  shrink
• 13:19
  our
• 13:19
  way
• 13:19
  into
• 13:20
  love.