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The Debt of Grace: Why Generosity Should Start at Home · Doing Marriage Well

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  Doing Marriage Well for June 21, 2026 The Debt of Grace Why Generosity Should
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  Start at Home For over two decades, Lori and I wrote and spoke as the generous
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  husband and the generous wife.
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  This week, I want to go back to those roots.
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  A Bible-based definition of generosity would be something such as this.
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  Generosity is defined as the joyful, sacrificial, and willing practice of sharing
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  time, talents, and material wealth with others.
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  It is rooted in the character of God, who gave the ultimate gift of salvation
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  through Jesus Christ and the forgiveness of our sins.
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  There are dozens of verses that command us to be generous.
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  But as the definition above says, we should do it because we have been the recipient
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  of generosity beyond measure or comprehension.
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  I think the parable of the unmerciful servant, found in Matthew 18,
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  21-35, is relevant here.
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  A king forgave a debt equal to billions of dollars to a servant.
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  Then that same man had a fellow servant thrown into jail for a debt of about $10,000.
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  When the king learned about this, it ended very badly for the first servant.
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  If we apply this to marriage, God is not amused with us when we fail to show our spouse generosity.
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  In fact, there is good reason to suspect he is less generous to us when we act this way.
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  Generosity from the heart is far better than doing it out of concern about how
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  God may deal with us, but I think we do well to understand what's at stake.
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  If you follow Jesus, generosity is not actually optional And the closer someone
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  is to you, the more generous you need to be with them This means generosity
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  starts at home, with your spouse and your kids,
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  This is exactly what Lori realized when she decided to become generous about
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  four decades ago Being generous to others would be easy Being generous at home
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  was going to be difficult,
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  But she did it, and it changed our marriage, our family, and in time,
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  many other lives and marriages Are you ready to change your marriage?
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  Spend a bit of time thinking about where you are and are not generous,
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  and come back tomorrow to be challenged to do better.
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  This is Paul, and generosity is very much doing marriage well.