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Hypnosis to Release Shame and Activate an Inner Voice of Encouragement · The Hypnotist

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Welcome to The Hypnotist, the show that gives you inside
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access to cutting edge hypnosis with real clients facing genuine
0:07
issues. Brought to you by the
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hypnotherapist, demanded by celebrities, CEOs and even
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royalty. Adam Cox.
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These recordings took place live from Adam's clinic in London's
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world famous Harley Street. This podcast features powerful
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hypnosis, so do not listen while driving or operating machinery.
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This recording is not suitable for those with epilepsy or
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severe mental health issues, so get yourself comfortable and
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enjoy today's episode of The Hypnotist.
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Hi, it's Adam here, and you're about to listen to a hypnosis
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session all about releasing shame.
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And I think a lot of people carry shame from their past.
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Sometimes their childhood depends on the value system and
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the upbringing. But the client that I was
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working with had a very religious upbringing and a lot
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of the time there was an attempt to use shame as a.
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Way to use? Power dynamics and and keep
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someone feeling of low self worth because then they could.
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Be easier. To manipulate or control.
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And that can happen either consciously and maliciously or
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unconsciously and unintentionally.
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But however it comes from, sometimes people can have that
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kind of critical or judgmental voice from a parent or maybe a
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teacher, and then they internalize it and they're
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almost that way to themselves because they've learned how to
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use shame or judgment as a way to punish themselves.
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But the real function of shame is not to punish, it's to change
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future behaviour. So actually what you're going to
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hear in this session is a way of manipulating that critical
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judgmental in a voice and turning it into something much
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more positive and encouraging and supportive.
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There's also a distinction here because not all shame is
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deserved. If you've got certain rules, for
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example, and those rules are very strict and in fact
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impossible to adhere to, some people could break those rules
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and feel incredible amounts of shame, even though what that
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person did isn't particularly serious.
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And I can remember, I'm an atheist now, but I grew up in a
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in a Catholic religion. And I remember not sharing some
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money with my brother and I was told to and I didn't have to.
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But I remember going to confession in the church and
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just feeling all of this shame and guilt.
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And the priest looked at me and he was confused.
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He's like, I don't understand what you've done here.
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And that gave me a reference point that sometimes you can
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have real emotions like guilt and shame, even if what's that
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is actually linked to is not anything wrong.
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And that was certainly the case with this particular client.
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They were carrying a lot of shame.
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And, you know, it took a lot of indoctrination or belief systems
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instead of at a very young age for that person to feel shame.
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Whereas someone else with a different upbringing would have
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done exactly the same things and not had any shame at all.
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So there is this metaphor of letting go of undeserved shame
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and then allowing the deserved shame to influence future
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behaviour so they get the best of both worlds.
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But in all cases, it's about releasing the shame and
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activating a kinder, more encouraging and supportive inner
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voice. And here's the interesting
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thing. Sometimes perfectionism can be a
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cause of shame because if the standards are so high, failure
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is inevitable. When people fail, they feel low
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and they feel ashamed sometimes. And while they're in that lower
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shame state, quite often they'll do things that are the complete
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opposite of living at a high standard.
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It gives them permission to do things way below their standards
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because they feel shitty about themselves anyway, if that makes
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sense. So if you are carrying a lot of
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shame or you are very critical to yourself, I think you'll
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benefit from this session. It was created for an individual
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and on that basis, some of the suggestions would have been
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highly relevant to the client that I'm working with and not
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perhaps relevant to you at all. So if you like the idea of
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working with me directly, there will be a link in the in the
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description where you can schedule a completely free
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consultation call and we can explore the idea of working
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together. For now, though, find a quiet,
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comfortable place where you won't be.
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Disturbed. Relax.
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And enjoy the session. Take a deep.
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Breath in. And as you breathe in, in,
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breathe in that slow, long, relaxing breath.
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And as you exhale, just allow any feelings of stress or
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tension, particularly around the eyelids, to feel like they're
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just melting away. And just allow with your eyes
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closed yourself to focus on the sound of my voice as you
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continue to breathe in that relaxation and to exhale any
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feelings of tension, stress or worries that's in enabling you
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to drift deeper and deeper, relaxed.
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And maybe you can scan your body for any clues of tension, maybe
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around the jaw, the neck or the shoulders.
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And as you find yourself in that comfortable position, notice
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even more so than before, your breathing, inhaling gently and
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exhaling slowly, and with every breath just a little deeper and
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longer. And as you focus on your breath,
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I wonder if you can notice the rhythm of your heartbeat or
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maybe a pulse. And maybe you can notice it
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expanding with a feeling of calm, like ripples in
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Stillwater. And just allow yourself, give
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yourself permission with each exhale to allow tension to be
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released. Just allowing your whole body to
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loosen and relax and allowing mind to quieten.
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And maybe it feels as if you're descending into a calm, safe
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place within. Deeper, calmer and more at ease
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with each passing moment. And I want you to use the power
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of your imagination to imagine the children's slide, maybe a
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water slide or maybe a recreational slide that used to
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play with as a child. And maybe it was a straight
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line, or maybe it curved and twisted.
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But I want you to imagine something strange about this
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slide. It starts up in a cloud and ends
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at the top of a mountain. And as I countdown from 12:50,
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you will imagine with each descending number what it would
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feel like to slide down that very long slide.
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And you will imagine what it would feel like when I arrive at
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1:00. But when you finish the slide,
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you end up at the top of a particular mountain, a mountain
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with an incredible view of the town, of nature, maybe of other
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things that you recognize. But for now you're up there in
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that cloud. Maybe you can notice the colour
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of that slide, the material. Maybe it's made of plastic or
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aluminium. 10 starting to slide down that slide.
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And nine, as you slide down the slide, just feel your whole body
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relax. 8 continuing to descend down, deeper down, and seven,
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unleashing a sense of fun, of lightness.
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And six, just feel the exhilaration of sliding down
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that slide, almost like you're reminded of that childhood
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moment where you had all that fun sliding down a slide And a
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six turns to five, just feel your arms and legs feel limp,
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loose and heavy. And four, your internal organs
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will start to relax, your heart, lungs, even your gut, relaxing
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as your breathing slows down even more.
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And then three. So relax as you get closer to
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the mountaintop, 2. Feeling completely calm and
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relaxed and one feeling a ripple of relaxation from your toes to
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the top of your heads, all the way down to the tips of your
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fingers. And 0, you're no longer on the
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slide and you are now at the peak, the pinnacle, the summit
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of a mountain. And I want you to imagine
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feeling that sense of peace, perhaps even a feeling of awe
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there on that mountaintop, and lean into that feeling, the
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feeling of being aligned with yourself, feeling connected to
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you and to nature. And I want you to imagine.
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I want you to imagine there is now someone from your past
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talking into one of your ears, and this is a critical,
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judgmental voice reminding you of things from your past as if
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you're still guilty now. And maybe it starts as their
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voice and then turns into your voice, but their tone, saying
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all those things that you did wrong, that you messed up, that
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you're bad or unworthy. And just notice when you hear
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those words. Maybe you can find the location
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where shame takes place within you.
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Maybe your torso, your solar plexus, your heart.
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And maybe it's a heavy feeling or an unsettled, uncomfortable
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feeling. I don't want you to get a sense
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then. Not all shame is useful.
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There are places in the world where people are shamed for
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being a different gender, a different religion, a different
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age. People can be shamed by people
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projecting values and judgement onto other people.
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And we can consider that unuseful shame.
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Shame built on false foundations.
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And I want you to start thinking of just how much of your shame
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is that type of shame. Not because you did something
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bad or wrong, just because people were projecting their
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standards, sometimes hypocritical standards, onto
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you. And for all that shame, I want
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you to feel like it's a heavy rock that you've been carrying
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that doesn't belong to you. And I want you to imagine that
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heavy rock somewhere near the summit of that mountain and feel
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how good it would feel to just release that weight, to let it
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go, to roll it down safely to a place in the mountain where it's
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out of harm's way. That you don't need to carry
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that shame anymore because it was never yours to begin with.
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And when you've released that shame, just let me know by
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nodding your head. That's in.
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But I want you to get a sense that there is useful shame.
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And useful shame is the shame that comes from not living up to
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your own reasonable standards, falling short of your own
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expectations, doing something that doesn't align with your
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integrity or your values. That shame we want to learn
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from, not discarded. And I wonder, I wonder if you
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could imagine that judgmental voice, that critical voice
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morphing into the tone of someone more helpful and kind
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and compassionate. I wonder if you could imagine
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someone that deeply cares for you talking about that moment
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from your past in such a way that it inspires you to do
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something different in your future.
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Maybe to hold yourself to a higher standard, to learn from
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the past, to feel wiser than you've ever felt before and
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start to change that voice into your own voice, but keeping the
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tonality and the intention the same.
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Some people see as shame as a form of punishment for doing
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something bad or wrong. But I want you to start to
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embrace a new belief that the real benefit of shame is to
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encourage you to hold yourself to a higher standard, to change
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future behaviour. You'll be punished by your past.
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And every time you hear this kind, encouraging, supportive
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voice telling you that you are capable of change, that you can
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live up to that higher standard, that you can and will make
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progress in your life, I want you to feel that shame disappear
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and be replaced with a much more wonderful sensation.
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Maybe hope, optimism, a sense of tenacity or determination.
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And when you can start to feel then new, useful, resourceful
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emotion, perhaps in the same place or a different place that
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shame used to be, just let me know by nodding your head.
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That's it. And I want you to thank the part
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responsible for shame, not the false shame, the real shame.
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Because it wants you to be better than ever before, to
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grow, to evolve, to become the best version of you.
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And that intention is a wonderful intention.
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But I want that part to embrace that new, kind, encouraging,
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supportive voice. And rather than telling you what
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you did wrong, it will encourage you to make incremental progress
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and changes in your future. Every time it does that, you are
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releasing the shame and embracing the very resources
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that can enhance the quality of your life.
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And many people don't do this. They hold themselves up to a
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standard of perfection, such a high standard it can never be
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attained. And when they fall short, they
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feel ashamed or unworthy. But when they feel ashamed or
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unworthy, that gives them permission to do other things
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that are below their standards, which leads to more shame and
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more unworthiness, which lowers the standards even more.
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Because many people feel that if the game is not winnable, they
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don't want to play. And perfectionism.
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Is not a winnable game. It's a game of shame.
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And if you're willing to play a new game because the highest
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standard you could have is better than you've been before,
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you can't do the impossible. But you can replicate your past
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and enhance it even more. And I want you to feel that
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every time you set a new standard, every time you make
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progress, every time you do something better than ever
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before, you will feel the opposite of shame.
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And that is a sense of personal pride.
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For years, shame has tried to motivate you by beating you with
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a stick, but personal pride can motivate you with encouragement,
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inspiration and feelings of constant improvement.
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And if your unconscious is now willing to help you raise your
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standards higher than ever before, but using encouragement,
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kindness, support and pride rather than criticism, judgement
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and shame, let me know by nodding your head.
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And the more you think about that, the truer it becomes.
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And the more you hear that voice being kind to yourself and
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encouraging, the more personal pride you will feel and the more
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motivated you are to make even more progress, which gives you
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even more personal pride. I want you to get this wonderful
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sense that this game is always winnable.
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And I want you to imagine that whenever that old critical voice
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comes back, I want you to get a sense that it's like an old
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radio that is on the wrong station.
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And you can just imagine tuning it to that new voice, the kind,
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encouraging, compassionate, understanding, supportive voice.
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That's something you can just do and hear that voice now telling
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you you've got this, you're capable.
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Of course, you can make lots of tiny changes to enhance the
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quality of your life. That will be good for you, good
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for your partner. You become a better role model
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for your children. I want you to feel that that
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once judgmental, critical voice is now a coach, a mentor, a
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cheerleader, a guide on your journey.
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So let any old shame feel that it can dissolve now, because you
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can take all of the wisdom learned from that shame and feed
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it to that now encouraging voice to help you enhance the quality
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of your life and the quality of your standards.
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But only when shame is reasonable.
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It's not a prison, but a teacher, not a chain, but a
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signpost. You're not afraid of shame.
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I'm just keen to learn from it and turn that shame into a
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resolution, a resolve, a plan to make progress with that
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encouraging support from within. And there on the top of that
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mountain, I wonder if you could imagine a giant hologram there
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in the sky. And I want you to see yourself
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in the days, weeks, or perhaps months ahead.
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See yourself with that new inner voice.
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A voice that is compassionate when you stumble.
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A voice that encourages you when you hesitate.
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A voice that knows how to lead you into stimulating ways of
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enhancing your life when you're bored or have time in your
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hands. I want you to get a sense then
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time is a resource, and the willingness to make progress
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means that you can put that time to use.
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So I want you to see yourself in a future situation where once
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you might have felt shame, and notice that instead how you
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respond with a different quality, a different expression,
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perhaps a quiet determination to improve.
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But you are improving without criticism or cruelty.
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And I want you to see yourself building your life on the
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wonderful compounding principle of incremental progress, knowing
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that perfection is not the goal, but growth, consistency, and
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becoming more of who you truly are meant to be.
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And step into that future version of you with less shame
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and more desire to make progress.
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And notice how that future feels, with all that shame
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fading away and feeling more self respect, self compassion,
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kindness for yourself, but also that drive to improve, to be the
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best version of you and to keep becoming that version of you.
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And when you think of that future now, you can feel a sense
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of optimism, resilience and encouragement, knowing that
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critical voice is now an encouraging voice.
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And if the critical voice comes back, you can just re tune it to
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that encouraging voice, supporting you, believing in you
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every step of the way. And here's the thing, making
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progress doesn't require you to be perfect.
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Because even learning from a set back or a mistake is still
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progress so long as you implement that lesson.
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And I want you to imagine it's time to leave this mountain, but
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you leave all the shame behind. And instead you take that kind
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encouraging voice and that burning desire to make progress.
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I don't want you to. Imagine jumping up on that slide
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and climbing up the slide in the reverse way that you slid down
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all the way back up to the cloud.
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And when you get to the cloud, imagine taking a deep breath in
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through your nose and out through your nose.
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Just wiggle your fingers and wiggle your toes.
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Start to connect and calibrate into the here and the now.
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As I now count from 1:00 to 10:00 to awaken you.
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You will imagine floating from that cloud back into your
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physical body, feeling the shame is now in your past and progress
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is now in your future. Starting to count to awaken you.
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123 waking up. 456 more alert 7 eights.
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Open your eyes. Open your eyes 910 Wide awake,
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Wide awake. Wide awake.
29:14
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