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The Baseline of Grace: Generosity When You Least Feel Like It · Doing Marriage Well

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  Doing Marriage Well for June 22, 2026 The Baseline of Grace Being Generous When
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  You Least Feel Like It Generosity is one of the best things you can do for your marriage.
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  It can also be exceptionally difficult.
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  The key to doing it well is being consistent. Just being generous when things
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  are going well and you feel good about life isn't worth much.
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  It's nice, but it's not marriage changing.
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  But being generous when you feel tired, stressed, or just blah is hard.
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  Giving when you want to receive and reaching out when you want to be left alone
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  takes substantial effort and commitment.
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  Of course, your mood and other things will influence how generous you are. This can't be avoided.
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  But you can set a minimum and fight to meet that regardless.
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  Then, when life is great, you can be even more generous. Doing this requires
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  making a commitment to do it.
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  The other struggle is being generous to your spouse when what they deserve,
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  based on their words and behavior, is not generosity.
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  Being generous when they have been rude, selfish, or distant isn't just difficult. It feels wrong.
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  It feels like you're rewarding their bad behavior. Why would you want to do that?
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  The Bible tells us God loved us when we were unlovable. I realize He's God and
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  we're not, but we are still called to be like Him, and we are promised He will
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  help us if we call out to Him.
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  I suspect we sometimes don't seek God's help because we really don't want to do it.
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  We don't want to be generous when our spouse has been selfish.
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  We don't want to give anything to them when they refuse to give to us what we want and need.
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  Again, it takes commitment. We
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  must decide our spouse deserves generosity because we have said they do.
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  It's not a reward for what they do. It's not a quid pro quo.
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  It's what we have decided to do. It's not about them. It's about us.
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  Of course, you have to protect yourself and not give more than you can handle.
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  But with God's help, you can choose to walk in abundant generosity for your
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  spouse, and that will bring about amazing things.
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  This is Paul reminding you that doing marriage well looks different for every couple.