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Does Narcissistic Abuse Impact Your Health? · Soma Wellness

1:01
SPEAKER_00: Today's
1:01
SPEAKER_00: topic
1:02
SPEAKER_00: is
1:02
SPEAKER_00: near
1:03
SPEAKER_00: and
1:03
SPEAKER_00: dear
1:04
SPEAKER_00: to
1:04
SPEAKER_00: my
1:05
SPEAKER_00: soul.
1:05
SPEAKER_00: We
1:06
SPEAKER_00: are
1:06
SPEAKER_00: talking
1:07
SPEAKER_00: about
1:07
SPEAKER_00: the
1:07
SPEAKER_00: somatic
1:08
SPEAKER_00: aftermath
1:09
SPEAKER_00: of
1:09
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
1:10
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
1:12
SPEAKER_00: You
1:12
SPEAKER_00: see,
1:13
SPEAKER_00: in
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SPEAKER_00: 2020,
1:15
SPEAKER_00: I
1:16
SPEAKER_00: really
1:18
SPEAKER_00: started
1:18
SPEAKER_00: to
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SPEAKER_00: notice
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SPEAKER_00: the
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SPEAKER_00: correlation
1:22
SPEAKER_00: between
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SPEAKER_00: pain
1:23
SPEAKER_00: in
1:23
SPEAKER_00: the
1:23
SPEAKER_00: body
1:24
SPEAKER_00: and
1:25
SPEAKER_00: pain
1:25
SPEAKER_00: in
1:25
SPEAKER_00: the
1:26
SPEAKER_00: mind
1:26
SPEAKER_00: and
1:26
SPEAKER_00: pain
1:27
SPEAKER_00: in
1:27
SPEAKER_00: the
1:28
SPEAKER_00: emotions
1:29
SPEAKER_00: and
1:30
SPEAKER_00: pain
1:30
SPEAKER_00: in
1:30
SPEAKER_00: the
1:30
SPEAKER_00: soul.
1:31
SPEAKER_00: I
1:32
SPEAKER_00: started
1:32
SPEAKER_00: reading
1:33
SPEAKER_00: a
1:33
SPEAKER_00: book
1:34
SPEAKER_00: called
1:34
SPEAKER_00: Your
1:34
SPEAKER_00: Body
1:35
SPEAKER_00: Keeps
1:35
SPEAKER_00: the
1:35
SPEAKER_00: Score
1:36
SPEAKER_00: because
1:36
SPEAKER_00: I
1:36
SPEAKER_00: noticed
1:37
SPEAKER_00: that
1:37
SPEAKER_00: a
1:38
SPEAKER_00: lot
1:38
SPEAKER_00: of
1:38
SPEAKER_00: my
1:38
SPEAKER_00: clients
1:40
SPEAKER_00: in
1:40
SPEAKER_00: my
1:40
SPEAKER_00: massage
1:41
SPEAKER_00: clinic
1:42
SPEAKER_00: were
1:42
SPEAKER_00: coming
1:42
SPEAKER_00: in
1:43
SPEAKER_00: with
1:43
SPEAKER_00: a
1:44
SPEAKER_00: lot
1:44
SPEAKER_00: of
1:44
SPEAKER_00: trauma
1:45
SPEAKER_00: from
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SPEAKER_00: COVID.
1:46
SPEAKER_00: And
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SPEAKER_00: they
1:47
SPEAKER_00: were
1:47
SPEAKER_00: having
1:48
SPEAKER_00: a
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SPEAKER_00: very
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SPEAKER_00: hard
1:49
SPEAKER_00: time
1:50
SPEAKER_00: reintegrating.
1:51
SPEAKER_00: There
1:52
SPEAKER_00: wasn't
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SPEAKER_00: a
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SPEAKER_00: lot
1:52
SPEAKER_00: of
1:52
SPEAKER_00: help
1:53
SPEAKER_00: for
1:53
SPEAKER_00: them.
1:54
SPEAKER_00: Therapists
1:55
SPEAKER_00: were
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SPEAKER_00: booked
1:56
SPEAKER_00: out
1:56
SPEAKER_00: nine
1:56
SPEAKER_00: months
1:57
SPEAKER_00: ahead
1:57
SPEAKER_00: of
1:58
SPEAKER_00: time.
1:58
SPEAKER_00: And
1:59
SPEAKER_00: I
1:59
SPEAKER_00: knew
2:00
SPEAKER_00: that
2:00
SPEAKER_00: massage
2:01
SPEAKER_00: therapists,
2:02
SPEAKER_00: hairdressers,
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SPEAKER_00: people
2:03
SPEAKER_00: who
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SPEAKER_00: talk
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SPEAKER_00: to
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SPEAKER_00: people
2:05
SPEAKER_00: were
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SPEAKER_00: kind
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SPEAKER_00: of
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SPEAKER_00: the
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SPEAKER_00: frontline
2:07
SPEAKER_00: workers
2:07
SPEAKER_00: of
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SPEAKER_00: trauma.
2:09
SPEAKER_00: So
2:09
SPEAKER_00: I
2:09
SPEAKER_00: started
2:10
SPEAKER_00: studying
2:11
SPEAKER_00: trauma
2:12
SPEAKER_00: and
2:13
SPEAKER_00: getting
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SPEAKER_00: more
2:14
SPEAKER_00: into
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SPEAKER_00: working
2:15
SPEAKER_00: directly
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SPEAKER_00: with
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SPEAKER_00: trauma
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SPEAKER_00: instead
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SPEAKER_00: of
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SPEAKER_00: saying,
2:18
SPEAKER_00: have
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SPEAKER_00: a
2:18
SPEAKER_00: nice
2:19
SPEAKER_00: day,
2:19
SPEAKER_00: go
2:19
SPEAKER_00: take
2:20
SPEAKER_00: that
2:20
SPEAKER_00: emotional
2:20
SPEAKER_00: release
2:21
SPEAKER_00: to
2:21
SPEAKER_00: someone
2:21
SPEAKER_00: else.
2:22
SPEAKER_00: Because
2:23
SPEAKER_00: I
2:23
SPEAKER_00: just
2:23
SPEAKER_00: felt
2:24
SPEAKER_00: like
2:24
SPEAKER_00: that
2:24
SPEAKER_00: was
2:24
SPEAKER_00: irresponsible.
2:25
SPEAKER_00: And
2:26
SPEAKER_00: also,
2:27
SPEAKER_00: as
2:27
SPEAKER_00: I
2:27
SPEAKER_00: was
2:27
SPEAKER_00: reading
2:28
SPEAKER_00: Your
2:28
SPEAKER_00: Body
2:28
SPEAKER_00: Keeps
2:28
SPEAKER_00: the
2:29
SPEAKER_00: Score,
2:29
SPEAKER_00: I
2:29
SPEAKER_00: started
2:29
SPEAKER_00: realizing
2:30
SPEAKER_00: probably
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SPEAKER_00: that
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SPEAKER_00: I
2:31
SPEAKER_00: had
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SPEAKER_00: my
2:32
SPEAKER_00: own
2:32
SPEAKER_00: unprocessed
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SPEAKER_00: trauma.
2:33
SPEAKER_00: I
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SPEAKER_00: mean,
2:34
SPEAKER_00: I
2:34
SPEAKER_00: was
2:35
SPEAKER_00: at
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SPEAKER_00: that
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SPEAKER_00: time
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SPEAKER_00: living
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SPEAKER_00: with
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SPEAKER_00: and
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SPEAKER_00: actively
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SPEAKER_00: engaged
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SPEAKER_00: with
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SPEAKER_00: a
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SPEAKER_00: narcissist,
2:40
SPEAKER_00: a
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SPEAKER_00: very,
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SPEAKER_00: very
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SPEAKER_00: out-of-control
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SPEAKER_00: narcissist
2:43
SPEAKER_00: who
2:44
SPEAKER_00: at
2:44
SPEAKER_00: the
2:44
SPEAKER_00: time
2:44
SPEAKER_00: I
2:45
SPEAKER_00: really
2:45
SPEAKER_00: didn't
2:45
SPEAKER_00: fully
2:46
SPEAKER_00: understand
2:47
SPEAKER_00: narcissism.
2:48
SPEAKER_00: I
2:48
SPEAKER_00: didn't
2:49
SPEAKER_00: understand
2:49
SPEAKER_00: what
2:49
SPEAKER_00: it
2:49
SPEAKER_00: was.
2:50
SPEAKER_00: I
2:50
SPEAKER_00: didn't
2:50
SPEAKER_00: think
2:51
SPEAKER_00: that
2:51
SPEAKER_00: I
2:51
SPEAKER_00: was
2:52
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
2:52
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
2:53
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
2:54
SPEAKER_00: I
2:54
SPEAKER_00: literally
2:55
SPEAKER_00: had
2:55
SPEAKER_00: no
2:55
SPEAKER_00: clue.
2:56
SPEAKER_00: And
2:56
SPEAKER_00: so
2:57
SPEAKER_00: what
2:57
SPEAKER_00: I
2:58
SPEAKER_00: really
2:58
SPEAKER_00: want
2:58
SPEAKER_00: to
2:58
SPEAKER_00: talk
2:58
SPEAKER_00: about
2:59
SPEAKER_00: is
2:59
SPEAKER_00: how
2:59
SPEAKER_00: the
3:00
SPEAKER_00: body
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SPEAKER_00: communicates
3:01
SPEAKER_00: what
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SPEAKER_00: the
3:01
SPEAKER_00: mind
3:02
SPEAKER_00: does
3:02
SPEAKER_00: not
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SPEAKER_00: understand
3:03
SPEAKER_00: or
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SPEAKER_00: does
3:04
SPEAKER_00: not
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SPEAKER_00: have
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SPEAKER_00: language
3:05
SPEAKER_00: for.
3:27
SPEAKER_00: And
3:27
SPEAKER_00: then
3:27
SPEAKER_00: he
3:27
SPEAKER_00: can
3:27
SPEAKER_00: see
3:28
SPEAKER_00: the
3:28
SPEAKER_00: matrix.
3:29
SPEAKER_00: That's
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SPEAKER_00: what
3:29
SPEAKER_00: it
3:30
SPEAKER_00: felt
3:30
SPEAKER_00: like.
3:31
SPEAKER_00: Like
3:32
SPEAKER_00: I
3:32
SPEAKER_00: was
3:33
SPEAKER_00: um
3:34
SPEAKER_00: looking
3:34
SPEAKER_00: at
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SPEAKER_00: the
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SPEAKER_00: world
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SPEAKER_00: completely
3:36
SPEAKER_00: differently,
3:37
SPEAKER_00: and
3:37
SPEAKER_00: I
3:37
SPEAKER_00: had
3:37
SPEAKER_00: no
3:38
SPEAKER_00: idea
3:38
SPEAKER_00: that
3:38
SPEAKER_00: I
3:39
SPEAKER_00: was
3:39
SPEAKER_00: in
3:39
SPEAKER_00: a
3:39
SPEAKER_00: prison.
3:40
SPEAKER_00: And
3:40
SPEAKER_00: it
3:41
SPEAKER_00: was
3:41
SPEAKER_00: a
3:41
SPEAKER_00: prison
3:42
SPEAKER_00: of
3:43
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
3:44
SPEAKER_00: abuse,
3:45
SPEAKER_00: and
3:45
SPEAKER_00: it
3:45
SPEAKER_00: was
3:45
SPEAKER_00: literally
3:46
SPEAKER_00: draining
3:47
SPEAKER_00: my
3:48
SPEAKER_00: soul.
3:49
SPEAKER_00: And
3:49
SPEAKER_00: I
3:50
SPEAKER_00: didn't
3:50
SPEAKER_00: really
3:50
SPEAKER_00: understand
3:51
SPEAKER_00: what
3:51
SPEAKER_00: that
3:51
SPEAKER_00: meant.
3:52
SPEAKER_00: And
3:52
SPEAKER_00: if
3:52
SPEAKER_00: you
3:52
SPEAKER_00: don't
3:52
SPEAKER_00: know
3:52
SPEAKER_00: what
3:53
SPEAKER_00: that
3:53
SPEAKER_00: means,
3:53
SPEAKER_00: hold
3:54
SPEAKER_00: on,
3:54
SPEAKER_00: I'm
3:54
SPEAKER_00: gonna
3:54
SPEAKER_00: explain
3:55
SPEAKER_00: it
3:55
SPEAKER_00: in
3:55
SPEAKER_00: just
3:56
SPEAKER_00: a
3:56
SPEAKER_00: second.
3:57
SPEAKER_00: So
3:58
SPEAKER_00: one
3:59
SPEAKER_00: of
3:59
SPEAKER_00: the
3:59
SPEAKER_00: most
4:00
SPEAKER_00: perplexing
4:00
SPEAKER_00: realities
4:01
SPEAKER_00: that
4:02
SPEAKER_00: survivors
4:02
SPEAKER_00: of
4:03
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
4:04
SPEAKER_00: abuse
4:04
SPEAKER_00: um
4:06
SPEAKER_00: uncover
4:07
SPEAKER_00: is
4:08
SPEAKER_00: the
4:08
SPEAKER_00: bodies,
4:09
SPEAKER_00: their
4:09
SPEAKER_00: body
4:10
SPEAKER_00: carries
4:10
SPEAKER_00: the
4:11
SPEAKER_00: trace
4:11
SPEAKER_00: of
4:11
SPEAKER_00: trauma
4:12
SPEAKER_00: as
4:12
SPEAKER_00: profoundly,
4:13
SPEAKER_00: if
4:14
SPEAKER_00: not
4:14
SPEAKER_00: more
4:14
SPEAKER_00: so,
4:14
SPEAKER_00: than
4:14
SPEAKER_00: their
4:15
SPEAKER_00: minds.
4:16
SPEAKER_00: We
4:16
SPEAKER_00: tend
4:16
SPEAKER_00: to
4:17
SPEAKER_00: conceptualize
4:17
SPEAKER_00: trauma
4:18
SPEAKER_00: as
4:18
SPEAKER_00: primarily
4:19
SPEAKER_00: a
4:19
SPEAKER_00: psychological
4:20
SPEAKER_00: phenomenon,
4:22
SPEAKER_00: but
4:22
SPEAKER_00: new
4:22
SPEAKER_00: research,
4:23
SPEAKER_00: um,
4:23
SPEAKER_00: like
4:24
SPEAKER_00: such
4:24
SPEAKER_00: as
4:24
SPEAKER_00: the
4:24
SPEAKER_00: groundbreaking
4:25
SPEAKER_00: book,
4:26
SPEAKER_00: you
4:26
SPEAKER_00: know,
4:26
SPEAKER_00: Your
4:26
SPEAKER_00: Body
4:26
SPEAKER_00: Keeps
4:27
SPEAKER_00: the
4:27
SPEAKER_00: Score,
4:28
SPEAKER_00: um,
4:28
SPEAKER_00: helps
4:29
SPEAKER_00: us
4:29
SPEAKER_00: understand
4:31
SPEAKER_00: that
4:33
SPEAKER_00: the
4:34
SPEAKER_00: body
4:35
SPEAKER_00: is
4:35
SPEAKER_00: actually
4:36
SPEAKER_00: communicating
4:37
SPEAKER_00: with
4:37
SPEAKER_00: you
4:37
SPEAKER_00: about
4:38
SPEAKER_00: your
4:38
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
4:38
SPEAKER_00: Um,
4:38
SPEAKER_00: in
4:39
SPEAKER_00: massage
4:39
SPEAKER_00: school,
4:40
SPEAKER_00: we're
4:40
SPEAKER_00: taught
4:40
SPEAKER_00: about
4:40
SPEAKER_00: like
4:40
SPEAKER_00: emotional
4:41
SPEAKER_00: release
4:41
SPEAKER_00: and
4:41
SPEAKER_00: how
4:42
SPEAKER_00: when
4:42
SPEAKER_00: you
4:42
SPEAKER_00: work
4:43
SPEAKER_00: on
4:43
SPEAKER_00: somebody,
4:43
SPEAKER_00: they
4:43
SPEAKER_00: might
4:44
SPEAKER_00: start
4:44
SPEAKER_00: crying
4:45
SPEAKER_00: and
4:45
SPEAKER_00: that's
4:45
SPEAKER_00: like
4:45
SPEAKER_00: an
4:45
SPEAKER_00: old
4:46
SPEAKER_00: unprocessed
4:47
SPEAKER_00: memory
4:47
SPEAKER_00: coming
4:48
SPEAKER_00: up.
4:48
SPEAKER_00: But
4:48
SPEAKER_00: these
4:49
SPEAKER_00: like
4:49
SPEAKER_00: um
4:50
SPEAKER_00: traumatic
4:51
SPEAKER_00: experiences
4:52
SPEAKER_00: are
4:52
SPEAKER_00: bigger
4:53
SPEAKER_00: than
4:53
SPEAKER_00: that.
4:53
SPEAKER_00: Because
4:54
SPEAKER_00: if
4:54
SPEAKER_00: you
4:54
SPEAKER_00: have
4:55
SPEAKER_00: somebody
4:55
SPEAKER_00: that
4:56
SPEAKER_00: has
4:56
SPEAKER_00: endured
4:57
SPEAKER_00: a
4:58
SPEAKER_00: long,
4:58
SPEAKER_00: a
4:59
SPEAKER_00: long-standing
5:00
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
5:01
SPEAKER_00: abuse,
5:01
SPEAKER_00: for
5:01
SPEAKER_00: instance,
5:02
SPEAKER_00: if
5:02
SPEAKER_00: they
5:02
SPEAKER_00: were
5:02
SPEAKER_00: married
5:03
SPEAKER_00: to
5:03
SPEAKER_00: a
5:03
SPEAKER_00: narcissist,
5:04
SPEAKER_00: if
5:04
SPEAKER_00: they
5:04
SPEAKER_00: dated
5:05
SPEAKER_00: one,
5:06
SPEAKER_00: if
5:06
SPEAKER_00: they
5:07
SPEAKER_00: uh
5:07
SPEAKER_00: were
5:08
SPEAKER_00: raised
5:09
SPEAKER_00: in
5:09
SPEAKER_00: a
5:09
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
5:10
SPEAKER_00: household.
5:11
SPEAKER_00: And
5:11
SPEAKER_00: uh
5:11
SPEAKER_00: just
5:12
SPEAKER_00: for
5:12
SPEAKER_00: clarity
5:12
SPEAKER_00: here,
5:13
SPEAKER_00: when
5:13
SPEAKER_00: I
5:14
SPEAKER_00: say
5:14
SPEAKER_00: narcissist
5:15
SPEAKER_00: or
5:15
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic,
5:16
SPEAKER_00: I
5:16
SPEAKER_00: am
5:16
SPEAKER_00: not
5:17
SPEAKER_00: talking
5:17
SPEAKER_00: only
5:17
SPEAKER_00: about
5:18
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
5:19
SPEAKER_00: personality
5:19
SPEAKER_00: disorder,
5:20
SPEAKER_00: which
5:20
SPEAKER_00: can
5:20
SPEAKER_00: be
5:21
SPEAKER_00: diagnosed
5:22
SPEAKER_00: by
5:22
SPEAKER_00: a
5:22
SPEAKER_00: mental
5:22
SPEAKER_00: health
5:22
SPEAKER_00: practitioner.
5:23
SPEAKER_00: I'm
5:24
SPEAKER_00: talking
5:24
SPEAKER_00: about
5:24
SPEAKER_00: the
5:25
SPEAKER_00: tools
5:25
SPEAKER_00: and
5:25
SPEAKER_00: strategies
5:26
SPEAKER_00: that
5:26
SPEAKER_00: somebody
5:27
SPEAKER_00: uses
5:27
SPEAKER_00: to
5:28
SPEAKER_00: control
5:28
SPEAKER_00: and
5:28
SPEAKER_00: manipulate
5:29
SPEAKER_00: another
5:29
SPEAKER_00: person.
5:30
SPEAKER_00: So
5:31
SPEAKER_00: for
5:31
SPEAKER_00: ease
5:31
SPEAKER_00: of
5:32
SPEAKER_00: use,
5:32
SPEAKER_00: we're
5:32
SPEAKER_00: just
5:32
SPEAKER_00: going
5:33
SPEAKER_00: to
5:33
SPEAKER_00: call
5:33
SPEAKER_00: it
5:33
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
5:34
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
5:35
SPEAKER_00: The
5:35
SPEAKER_00: abuser
5:36
SPEAKER_00: does
5:37
SPEAKER_00: not
5:37
SPEAKER_00: necessarily
5:38
SPEAKER_00: have
5:38
SPEAKER_00: to
5:38
SPEAKER_00: be
5:38
SPEAKER_00: a
5:39
SPEAKER_00: narcissist.
5:40
SPEAKER_00: They
5:40
SPEAKER_00: could
5:40
SPEAKER_00: be
5:40
SPEAKER_00: somebody
5:41
SPEAKER_00: struggling
5:41
SPEAKER_00: with
5:41
SPEAKER_00: addiction
5:42
SPEAKER_00: because
5:42
SPEAKER_00: the
5:42
SPEAKER_00: strategies
5:43
SPEAKER_00: are
5:43
SPEAKER_00: exactly
5:44
SPEAKER_00: the
5:44
SPEAKER_00: same.
5:44
SPEAKER_00: They
5:45
SPEAKER_00: could
5:45
SPEAKER_00: be
5:45
SPEAKER_00: somebody
5:46
SPEAKER_00: who
5:46
SPEAKER_00: just
5:47
SPEAKER_00: has
5:47
SPEAKER_00: a
5:47
SPEAKER_00: really
5:48
SPEAKER_00: um
5:48
SPEAKER_00: dominating
5:49
SPEAKER_00: or
5:49
SPEAKER_00: controlling
5:49
SPEAKER_00: personality.
5:50
SPEAKER_00: Um,
5:50
SPEAKER_00: there's
5:51
SPEAKER_00: many
5:51
SPEAKER_00: different
5:52
SPEAKER_00: types
5:52
SPEAKER_00: of
5:52
SPEAKER_00: people
5:53
SPEAKER_00: who
5:53
SPEAKER_00: use
5:53
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
5:54
SPEAKER_00: strategies
5:55
SPEAKER_00: to
5:56
SPEAKER_00: control
5:56
SPEAKER_00: your
5:56
SPEAKER_00: mind,
5:57
SPEAKER_00: emotions,
5:58
SPEAKER_00: your
5:58
SPEAKER_00: thoughts,
5:59
SPEAKER_00: your
5:59
SPEAKER_00: behavior,
6:00
SPEAKER_00: and
6:01
SPEAKER_00: basically
6:02
SPEAKER_00: your
6:02
SPEAKER_00: soul.
6:02
SPEAKER_00: And
6:03
SPEAKER_00: I
6:03
SPEAKER_00: know
6:03
SPEAKER_00: that's
6:03
SPEAKER_00: a
6:04
SPEAKER_00: really
6:04
SPEAKER_00: um
6:04
SPEAKER_00: intense
6:05
SPEAKER_00: statement,
6:06
SPEAKER_00: but
6:06
SPEAKER_00: it's
6:06
SPEAKER_00: true.
6:07
SPEAKER_00: So,
6:08
SPEAKER_00: what
6:08
SPEAKER_00: we're
6:09
SPEAKER_00: gonna
6:09
SPEAKER_00: talk
6:09
SPEAKER_00: about
6:09
SPEAKER_00: tonight
6:10
SPEAKER_00: is
6:10
SPEAKER_00: how
6:10
SPEAKER_00: the
6:10
SPEAKER_00: body
6:11
SPEAKER_00: is
6:11
SPEAKER_00: communicating
6:12
SPEAKER_00: it
6:13
SPEAKER_00: to
6:13
SPEAKER_00: the
6:14
SPEAKER_00: person
6:14
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
6:15
SPEAKER_00: it.
6:16
SPEAKER_00: So
6:16
SPEAKER_00: back
6:17
SPEAKER_00: in
6:17
SPEAKER_00: 2020,
6:18
SPEAKER_00: I
6:18
SPEAKER_00: started
6:18
SPEAKER_00: just
6:18
SPEAKER_00: seeing
6:19
SPEAKER_00: people
6:19
SPEAKER_00: come
6:20
SPEAKER_00: in.
6:20
SPEAKER_00: And
6:21
SPEAKER_00: I
6:21
SPEAKER_00: think
6:21
SPEAKER_00: 2020
6:22
SPEAKER_00: was
6:22
SPEAKER_00: like
6:22
SPEAKER_00: a
6:22
SPEAKER_00: mass
6:23
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
6:24
SPEAKER_00: trauma
6:25
SPEAKER_00: because
6:25
SPEAKER_00: of
6:25
SPEAKER_00: all
6:25
SPEAKER_00: the
6:26
SPEAKER_00: gaslighting
6:27
SPEAKER_00: and
6:27
SPEAKER_00: like
6:28
SPEAKER_00: basically
6:28
SPEAKER_00: the
6:29
SPEAKER_00: prison
6:29
SPEAKER_00: state.
6:29
SPEAKER_00: You
6:30
SPEAKER_00: know,
6:30
SPEAKER_00: we
6:30
SPEAKER_00: were
6:30
SPEAKER_00: like
6:30
SPEAKER_00: locked
6:31
SPEAKER_00: in
6:31
SPEAKER_00: our
6:31
SPEAKER_00: homes
6:31
SPEAKER_00: and
6:31
SPEAKER_00: able
6:32
SPEAKER_00: to
6:32
SPEAKER_00: connect
6:33
SPEAKER_00: with
6:33
SPEAKER_00: other
6:33
SPEAKER_00: people,
6:34
SPEAKER_00: isolated.
6:35
SPEAKER_00: All
6:35
SPEAKER_00: of
6:35
SPEAKER_00: these
6:35
SPEAKER_00: are
6:36
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
6:36
SPEAKER_00: strategies.
6:37
SPEAKER_00: Now,
6:38
SPEAKER_00: I'm
6:38
SPEAKER_00: not
6:38
SPEAKER_00: making
6:39
SPEAKER_00: any
6:39
SPEAKER_00: commentary
6:40
SPEAKER_00: about
6:40
SPEAKER_00: government
6:41
SPEAKER_00: or
6:41
SPEAKER_00: anything,
6:42
SPEAKER_00: I'm
6:42
SPEAKER_00: just
6:42
SPEAKER_00: talking
6:43
SPEAKER_00: about
6:43
SPEAKER_00: the
6:43
SPEAKER_00: experience.
6:44
SPEAKER_00: We
6:45
SPEAKER_00: went
6:45
SPEAKER_00: into
6:45
SPEAKER_00: full-blown
6:46
SPEAKER_00: scarcity.
6:47
SPEAKER_00: There
6:47
SPEAKER_00: wasn't
6:48
SPEAKER_00: enough
6:48
SPEAKER_00: uh
6:49
SPEAKER_00: like
6:49
SPEAKER_00: toilet
6:50
SPEAKER_00: paper.
6:50
SPEAKER_00: And
6:50
SPEAKER_00: I
6:50
SPEAKER_00: know
6:50
SPEAKER_00: that
6:51
SPEAKER_00: sounds
6:51
SPEAKER_00: like
6:51
SPEAKER_00: a
6:51
SPEAKER_00: random
6:51
SPEAKER_00: thing
6:52
SPEAKER_00: to
6:52
SPEAKER_00: think
6:52
SPEAKER_00: that
6:52
SPEAKER_00: was
6:52
SPEAKER_00: scarce,
6:53
SPEAKER_00: but
6:53
SPEAKER_00: I
6:53
SPEAKER_00: remember
6:54
SPEAKER_00: being
6:54
SPEAKER_00: panicked
6:54
SPEAKER_00: about
6:55
SPEAKER_00: it
6:55
SPEAKER_00: because
6:55
SPEAKER_00: it
6:56
SPEAKER_00: was
6:56
SPEAKER_00: my
6:56
SPEAKER_00: what
6:57
SPEAKER_00: my
6:57
SPEAKER_00: normal
6:57
SPEAKER_00: way
6:58
SPEAKER_00: of
6:58
SPEAKER_00: life
6:58
SPEAKER_00: was
6:58
SPEAKER_00: using
6:59
SPEAKER_00: toilet
6:59
SPEAKER_00: paper,
7:00
SPEAKER_00: right?
7:00
SPEAKER_00: Uh,
7:00
SPEAKER_00: we
7:00
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
7:01
SPEAKER_00: get
7:01
SPEAKER_00: pasta
7:02
SPEAKER_00: for
7:02
SPEAKER_00: a
7:02
SPEAKER_00: while,
7:02
SPEAKER_00: we
7:02
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
7:03
SPEAKER_00: get
7:04
SPEAKER_00: um
7:04
SPEAKER_00: access
7:05
SPEAKER_00: to
7:05
SPEAKER_00: money,
7:05
SPEAKER_00: especially
7:06
SPEAKER_00: for
7:06
SPEAKER_00: those
7:06
SPEAKER_00: of
7:06
SPEAKER_00: us
7:06
SPEAKER_00: who
7:07
SPEAKER_00: worked
7:07
SPEAKER_00: for
7:07
SPEAKER_00: ourselves
7:08
SPEAKER_00: and
7:08
SPEAKER_00: our
7:08
SPEAKER_00: businesses
7:09
SPEAKER_00: were
7:09
SPEAKER_00: closed
7:09
SPEAKER_00: down.
7:10
SPEAKER_00: It
7:10
SPEAKER_00: basically
7:11
SPEAKER_00: sent
7:12
SPEAKER_00: people
7:12
SPEAKER_00: into
7:13
SPEAKER_00: a
7:13
SPEAKER_00: global
7:14
SPEAKER_00: state
7:14
SPEAKER_00: of
7:15
SPEAKER_00: scarcity.
7:16
SPEAKER_00: One
7:16
SPEAKER_00: I
7:16
SPEAKER_00: don't
7:17
SPEAKER_00: think
7:17
SPEAKER_00: we
7:17
SPEAKER_00: have
7:17
SPEAKER_00: fully
7:18
SPEAKER_00: recovered
7:18
SPEAKER_00: from
7:18
SPEAKER_00: as
7:19
SPEAKER_00: a
7:19
SPEAKER_00: society,
7:20
SPEAKER_00: but
7:20
SPEAKER_00: I
7:20
SPEAKER_00: want
7:20
SPEAKER_00: to
7:20
SPEAKER_00: stay
7:21
SPEAKER_00: on
7:21
SPEAKER_00: the
7:21
SPEAKER_00: body
7:21
SPEAKER_00: for
7:21
SPEAKER_00: a
7:22
SPEAKER_00: moment.
7:22
SPEAKER_00: So
7:22
SPEAKER_00: when
7:22
SPEAKER_00: I
7:23
SPEAKER_00: started
7:23
SPEAKER_00: going
7:23
SPEAKER_00: back
7:23
SPEAKER_00: to
7:23
SPEAKER_00: work
7:24
SPEAKER_00: and
7:24
SPEAKER_00: I
7:24
SPEAKER_00: started
7:24
SPEAKER_00: seeing
7:25
SPEAKER_00: all
7:25
SPEAKER_00: of
7:25
SPEAKER_00: these
7:26
SPEAKER_00: people
7:26
SPEAKER_00: coming
7:26
SPEAKER_00: in
7:26
SPEAKER_00: in
7:27
SPEAKER_00: this
7:27
SPEAKER_00: state,
7:28
SPEAKER_00: uh
7:28
SPEAKER_00: their
7:28
SPEAKER_00: pain
7:29
SPEAKER_00: was
7:29
SPEAKER_00: worse,
7:30
SPEAKER_00: uh,
7:30
SPEAKER_00: their
7:31
SPEAKER_00: mental
7:31
SPEAKER_00: health
7:32
SPEAKER_00: was
7:32
SPEAKER_00: declining,
7:32
SPEAKER_00: emotional
7:33
SPEAKER_00: health
7:33
SPEAKER_00: was
7:33
SPEAKER_00: declining,
7:35
SPEAKER_00: and
7:35
SPEAKER_00: it
7:35
SPEAKER_00: it
7:36
SPEAKER_00: was
7:36
SPEAKER_00: scary
7:36
SPEAKER_00: and
7:37
SPEAKER_00: there
7:37
SPEAKER_00: wasn't
7:37
SPEAKER_00: enough
7:37
SPEAKER_00: help.
7:38
SPEAKER_00: And
7:38
SPEAKER_00: so
7:39
SPEAKER_00: we
7:39
SPEAKER_00: would
7:39
SPEAKER_00: start
7:40
SPEAKER_00: working
7:40
SPEAKER_00: on
7:41
SPEAKER_00: pain.
7:42
SPEAKER_00: And,
7:42
SPEAKER_00: you
7:43
SPEAKER_00: know,
7:43
SPEAKER_00: there
7:43
SPEAKER_00: were
7:43
SPEAKER_00: certain
7:44
SPEAKER_00: patterns
7:44
SPEAKER_00: of
7:44
SPEAKER_00: pain
7:45
SPEAKER_00: that
7:45
SPEAKER_00: were
7:45
SPEAKER_00: coming
7:46
SPEAKER_00: up
7:46
SPEAKER_00: that
7:47
SPEAKER_00: are
7:47
SPEAKER_00: what
7:48
SPEAKER_00: we're
7:48
SPEAKER_00: gonna
7:48
SPEAKER_00: talk
7:49
SPEAKER_00: about
7:49
SPEAKER_00: today,
7:50
SPEAKER_00: and
7:50
SPEAKER_00: that
7:50
SPEAKER_00: is
7:50
SPEAKER_00: like
7:50
SPEAKER_00: this
7:51
SPEAKER_00: somatic
7:52
SPEAKER_00: dimension
7:52
SPEAKER_00: of
7:53
SPEAKER_00: trauma,
7:53
SPEAKER_00: and
7:53
SPEAKER_00: it's
7:54
SPEAKER_00: minimized.
7:55
SPEAKER_00: And
7:55
SPEAKER_00: that
7:56
SPEAKER_00: I
7:56
SPEAKER_00: think
7:56
SPEAKER_00: is
7:56
SPEAKER_00: what
7:56
SPEAKER_00: frustrates
7:57
SPEAKER_00: me
7:58
SPEAKER_00: because
7:58
SPEAKER_00: people
7:58
SPEAKER_00: aren't
7:59
SPEAKER_00: talking
7:59
SPEAKER_00: about
8:00
SPEAKER_00: the
8:00
SPEAKER_00: root
8:00
SPEAKER_00: cause
8:01
SPEAKER_00: of
8:01
SPEAKER_00: a
8:01
SPEAKER_00: lot
8:01
SPEAKER_00: of
8:01
SPEAKER_00: illnesses.
8:03
SPEAKER_00: And
8:04
SPEAKER_00: when
8:04
SPEAKER_00: I
8:04
SPEAKER_00: started
8:05
SPEAKER_00: realizing
8:06
SPEAKER_00: that,
8:06
SPEAKER_00: you
8:07
SPEAKER_00: know,
8:07
SPEAKER_00: I
8:07
SPEAKER_00: was
8:08
SPEAKER_00: really
8:08
SPEAKER_00: dealing
8:08
SPEAKER_00: with
8:08
SPEAKER_00: something
8:09
SPEAKER_00: a
8:09
SPEAKER_00: lot
8:09
SPEAKER_00: bigger
8:10
SPEAKER_00: than
8:10
SPEAKER_00: I,
8:10
SPEAKER_00: a
8:11
SPEAKER_00: lot
8:11
SPEAKER_00: bigger
8:11
SPEAKER_00: than
8:11
SPEAKER_00: I
8:11
SPEAKER_00: knew
8:12
SPEAKER_00: I
8:12
SPEAKER_00: was
8:12
SPEAKER_00: gonna,
8:12
SPEAKER_00: like,
8:13
SPEAKER_00: uh
8:13
SPEAKER_00: than
8:13
SPEAKER_00: I
8:14
SPEAKER_00: than
8:14
SPEAKER_00: I
8:14
SPEAKER_00: knew
8:14
SPEAKER_00: I
8:14
SPEAKER_00: was.
8:15
SPEAKER_00: I
8:16
SPEAKER_00: just
8:16
SPEAKER_00: started
8:16
SPEAKER_00: reading
8:17
SPEAKER_00: up
8:17
SPEAKER_00: on
8:17
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
8:18
SPEAKER_00: abuse
8:18
SPEAKER_00: and
8:18
SPEAKER_00: I
8:18
SPEAKER_00: started
8:19
SPEAKER_00: gaining
8:19
SPEAKER_00: an
8:19
SPEAKER_00: understanding,
8:20
SPEAKER_00: and
8:20
SPEAKER_00: then
8:20
SPEAKER_00: the
8:20
SPEAKER_00: universe
8:21
SPEAKER_00: responded
8:22
SPEAKER_00: by
8:22
SPEAKER_00: sending
8:22
SPEAKER_00: me
8:23
SPEAKER_00: helpers.
8:23
SPEAKER_00: Um,
8:24
SPEAKER_00: like
8:24
SPEAKER_00: a
8:24
SPEAKER_00: client
8:24
SPEAKER_00: would
8:25
SPEAKER_00: come
8:25
SPEAKER_00: in
8:25
SPEAKER_00: and
8:25
SPEAKER_00: explain
8:26
SPEAKER_00: what
8:26
SPEAKER_00: triangulation
8:27
SPEAKER_00: was,
8:27
SPEAKER_00: and
8:27
SPEAKER_00: I
8:27
SPEAKER_00: was
8:27
SPEAKER_00: like,
8:27
SPEAKER_00: well,
8:28
SPEAKER_00: I
8:28
SPEAKER_00: don't
8:28
SPEAKER_00: even
8:28
SPEAKER_00: know
8:28
SPEAKER_00: what
8:28
SPEAKER_00: that
8:28
SPEAKER_00: is.
8:29
SPEAKER_00: I've
8:29
SPEAKER_00: never
8:29
SPEAKER_00: heard
8:29
SPEAKER_00: of
8:29
SPEAKER_00: it.
8:30
SPEAKER_00: Turns
8:30
SPEAKER_00: out
8:30
SPEAKER_00: I
8:31
SPEAKER_00: had
8:31
SPEAKER_00: lived
8:31
SPEAKER_00: my
8:31
SPEAKER_00: whole
8:32
SPEAKER_00: life
8:32
SPEAKER_00: in
8:32
SPEAKER_00: a
8:32
SPEAKER_00: drama
8:33
SPEAKER_00: triangle
8:33
SPEAKER_00: without
8:33
SPEAKER_00: even
8:34
SPEAKER_00: noticing
8:34
SPEAKER_00: it.
8:35
SPEAKER_00: Um,
8:36
SPEAKER_00: I
8:36
SPEAKER_00: uh
8:37
SPEAKER_00: started
8:37
SPEAKER_00: reading
8:38
SPEAKER_00: other
8:38
SPEAKER_00: books
8:39
SPEAKER_00: like
8:39
SPEAKER_00: uh
8:39
SPEAKER_00: The
8:39
SPEAKER_00: Human
8:40
SPEAKER_00: Magnet
8:40
SPEAKER_00: Syndrome,
8:41
SPEAKER_00: which
8:41
SPEAKER_00: talks
8:41
SPEAKER_00: about
8:42
SPEAKER_00: the
8:42
SPEAKER_00: polarity
8:42
SPEAKER_00: between
8:43
SPEAKER_00: the
8:43
SPEAKER_00: narcissist
8:44
SPEAKER_00: and
8:44
SPEAKER_00: the
8:44
SPEAKER_00: empath
8:45
SPEAKER_00: or
8:45
SPEAKER_00: the
8:45
SPEAKER_00: codependent.
8:46
SPEAKER_00: You'll
8:47
SPEAKER_00: hear
8:47
SPEAKER_00: me
8:47
SPEAKER_00: use
8:48
SPEAKER_00: the
8:48
SPEAKER_00: term
8:48
SPEAKER_00: codependent
8:49
SPEAKER_00: or
8:49
SPEAKER_00: empath
8:50
SPEAKER_00: interchangeably.
8:51
SPEAKER_00: Um,
8:51
SPEAKER_00: I
8:51
SPEAKER_00: think
8:52
SPEAKER_00: they're
8:52
SPEAKER_00: very
8:52
SPEAKER_00: similar.
8:53
SPEAKER_00: I
8:53
SPEAKER_00: don't
8:53
SPEAKER_00: know
8:53
SPEAKER_00: the
8:53
SPEAKER_00: exact
8:54
SPEAKER_00: like
8:54
SPEAKER_00: difference
8:55
SPEAKER_00: between
8:55
SPEAKER_00: the
8:56
SPEAKER_00: two.
8:56
SPEAKER_00: Um,
8:56
SPEAKER_00: I'll
8:57
SPEAKER_00: just
8:57
SPEAKER_00: say
8:58
SPEAKER_00: I
8:58
SPEAKER_00: had
8:58
SPEAKER_00: an
8:58
SPEAKER_00: anxious
8:59
SPEAKER_00: attachment
8:59
SPEAKER_00: style,
9:00
SPEAKER_00: I
9:00
SPEAKER_00: was
9:00
SPEAKER_00: a
9:00
SPEAKER_00: raging
9:01
SPEAKER_00: codependent,
9:02
SPEAKER_00: and
9:02
SPEAKER_00: I'm
9:02
SPEAKER_00: definitely
9:02
SPEAKER_00: an
9:03
SPEAKER_00: empath.
9:04
SPEAKER_00: So
9:05
SPEAKER_00: what
9:06
SPEAKER_00: I
9:06
SPEAKER_00: saw
9:07
SPEAKER_00: in
9:08
SPEAKER_00: my
9:08
SPEAKER_00: own
9:09
SPEAKER_00: unraveling
9:10
SPEAKER_00: was
9:10
SPEAKER_00: my
9:11
SPEAKER_00: body
9:11
SPEAKER_00: put
9:11
SPEAKER_00: weight
9:12
SPEAKER_00: on
9:12
SPEAKER_00: when
9:13
SPEAKER_00: I
9:13
SPEAKER_00: was
9:13
SPEAKER_00: around
9:13
SPEAKER_00: someone
9:14
SPEAKER_00: who
9:14
SPEAKER_00: was
9:14
SPEAKER_00: a
9:14
SPEAKER_00: narcissist
9:15
SPEAKER_00: as
9:15
SPEAKER_00: a
9:16
SPEAKER_00: protection
9:16
SPEAKER_00: mechanism.
9:18
SPEAKER_00: So
9:18
SPEAKER_00: as
9:18
SPEAKER_00: soon
9:19
SPEAKER_00: as
9:19
SPEAKER_00: I
9:19
SPEAKER_00: took
9:19
SPEAKER_00: my
9:20
SPEAKER_00: ex
9:20
SPEAKER_00: back,
9:20
SPEAKER_00: who
9:20
SPEAKER_00: was
9:21
SPEAKER_00: very
9:21
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic,
9:22
SPEAKER_00: I
9:22
SPEAKER_00: started
9:22
SPEAKER_00: gaining
9:23
SPEAKER_00: weight
9:23
SPEAKER_00: and
9:24
SPEAKER_00: I
9:24
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
9:24
SPEAKER_00: figure
9:25
SPEAKER_00: out
9:25
SPEAKER_00: why.
9:26
SPEAKER_00: Now,
9:26
SPEAKER_00: part
9:26
SPEAKER_00: of
9:26
SPEAKER_00: it
9:26
SPEAKER_00: was
9:27
SPEAKER_00: unconscious
9:27
SPEAKER_00: eating
9:28
SPEAKER_00: patterns,
9:28
SPEAKER_00: over
9:28
SPEAKER_00: drinking
9:29
SPEAKER_00: because
9:29
SPEAKER_00: it
9:29
SPEAKER_00: was
9:29
SPEAKER_00: COVID
9:30
SPEAKER_00: and
9:31
SPEAKER_00: um
9:31
SPEAKER_00: also
9:32
SPEAKER_00: getting
9:32
SPEAKER_00: less
9:32
SPEAKER_00: movement
9:33
SPEAKER_00: because
9:33
SPEAKER_00: it
9:33
SPEAKER_00: was
9:33
SPEAKER_00: COVID,
9:34
SPEAKER_00: but
9:34
SPEAKER_00: also
9:34
SPEAKER_00: because
9:35
SPEAKER_00: my
9:35
SPEAKER_00: body
9:35
SPEAKER_00: was
9:35
SPEAKER_00: literally
9:36
SPEAKER_00: saying,
9:37
SPEAKER_00: this
9:37
SPEAKER_00: person
9:37
SPEAKER_00: is
9:38
SPEAKER_00: not
9:38
SPEAKER_00: safe.
9:39
SPEAKER_00: I'm
9:39
SPEAKER_00: putting
9:40
SPEAKER_00: the
9:40
SPEAKER_00: protection
9:41
SPEAKER_00: back
9:42
SPEAKER_00: up.
9:43
SPEAKER_00: And
9:44
SPEAKER_00: it
9:44
SPEAKER_00: was
9:44
SPEAKER_00: frustrating
9:45
SPEAKER_00: to
9:45
SPEAKER_00: me
9:45
SPEAKER_00: because
9:45
SPEAKER_00: I
9:46
SPEAKER_00: didn't
9:46
SPEAKER_00: have
9:46
SPEAKER_00: context
9:47
SPEAKER_00: or
9:47
SPEAKER_00: understanding
9:47
SPEAKER_00: for
9:48
SPEAKER_00: it
9:48
SPEAKER_00: at
9:48
SPEAKER_00: the
9:48
SPEAKER_00: time.
9:48
SPEAKER_00: I
9:49
SPEAKER_00: also
9:49
SPEAKER_00: didn't
9:49
SPEAKER_00: know
9:49
SPEAKER_00: about
9:50
SPEAKER_00: protector
9:50
SPEAKER_00: controller
9:51
SPEAKER_00: parts
9:51
SPEAKER_00: of
9:51
SPEAKER_00: our
9:52
SPEAKER_00: unconscious
9:52
SPEAKER_00: mind,
9:53
SPEAKER_00: which
9:53
SPEAKER_00: we'll
9:53
SPEAKER_00: talk
9:53
SPEAKER_00: about
9:53
SPEAKER_00: more
9:54
SPEAKER_00: in
9:54
SPEAKER_00: another
9:54
SPEAKER_00: episode.
9:55
SPEAKER_00: But
9:56
SPEAKER_00: I
9:56
SPEAKER_00: I
9:56
SPEAKER_00: just
9:57
SPEAKER_00: didn't
9:57
SPEAKER_00: know
9:57
SPEAKER_00: what
9:58
SPEAKER_00: I
9:58
SPEAKER_00: didn't
9:58
SPEAKER_00: know.
9:59
SPEAKER_00: So
10:00
SPEAKER_00: as
10:00
SPEAKER_00: I'm
10:00
SPEAKER_00: starting
10:01
SPEAKER_00: to
10:01
SPEAKER_00: like
10:01
SPEAKER_00: put
10:01
SPEAKER_00: the
10:01
SPEAKER_00: pieces
10:02
SPEAKER_00: together,
10:02
SPEAKER_00: I'm
10:02
SPEAKER_00: looking
10:03
SPEAKER_00: at
10:03
SPEAKER_00: my
10:03
SPEAKER_00: own
10:03
SPEAKER_00: family
10:04
SPEAKER_00: dynamics
10:04
SPEAKER_00: and
10:04
SPEAKER_00: thinking,
10:05
SPEAKER_00: holy
10:06
SPEAKER_00: smokes,
10:06
SPEAKER_00: like
10:07
SPEAKER_00: I
10:07
SPEAKER_00: think
10:08
SPEAKER_00: my
10:08
SPEAKER_00: mom's
10:08
SPEAKER_00: a
10:08
SPEAKER_00: narcissist.
10:10
SPEAKER_00: And,
10:10
SPEAKER_00: you
10:10
SPEAKER_00: know,
10:11
SPEAKER_00: without
10:11
SPEAKER_00: diagnosing
10:12
SPEAKER_00: her,
10:13
SPEAKER_00: she
10:13
SPEAKER_00: definitely
10:13
SPEAKER_00: has
10:14
SPEAKER_00: strong
10:14
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
10:15
SPEAKER_00: control
10:16
SPEAKER_00: qualities.
10:17
SPEAKER_00: Like
10:17
SPEAKER_00: that's
10:18
SPEAKER_00: how
10:19
SPEAKER_00: she
10:20
SPEAKER_00: operates
10:21
SPEAKER_00: in
10:21
SPEAKER_00: the
10:21
SPEAKER_00: world,
10:22
SPEAKER_00: lose
10:22
SPEAKER_00: using
10:23
SPEAKER_00: a
10:23
SPEAKER_00: lot
10:23
SPEAKER_00: of
10:23
SPEAKER_00: lying,
10:24
SPEAKER_00: a
10:24
SPEAKER_00: lot
10:25
SPEAKER_00: of
10:25
SPEAKER_00: mind
10:26
SPEAKER_00: control,
10:27
SPEAKER_00: emotional
10:27
SPEAKER_00: manipulation,
10:29
SPEAKER_00: shame-based
10:30
SPEAKER_00: tactics,
10:31
SPEAKER_00: and
10:31
SPEAKER_00: triangulation
10:33
SPEAKER_00: to
10:33
SPEAKER_00: control
10:33
SPEAKER_00: everyone
10:34
SPEAKER_00: around
10:35
SPEAKER_00: her.
10:35
SPEAKER_00: And
10:36
SPEAKER_00: it's
10:36
SPEAKER_00: really
10:36
SPEAKER_00: to
10:37
SPEAKER_00: keep
10:37
SPEAKER_00: herself
10:38
SPEAKER_00: in
10:38
SPEAKER_00: the
10:38
SPEAKER_00: hero
10:39
SPEAKER_00: role
10:39
SPEAKER_00: of
10:40
SPEAKER_00: her
10:41
SPEAKER_00: reality,
10:42
SPEAKER_00: her
10:42
SPEAKER_00: very
10:44
SPEAKER_00: interesting
10:44
SPEAKER_00: and
10:45
SPEAKER_00: twisted
10:45
SPEAKER_00: reality.
10:46
SPEAKER_00: Now,
10:47
SPEAKER_00: um
10:48
SPEAKER_00: what
10:50
SPEAKER_00: I
10:50
SPEAKER_00: noticed
10:51
SPEAKER_00: when
10:52
SPEAKER_00: I
10:52
SPEAKER_00: was
10:52
SPEAKER_00: looking
10:53
SPEAKER_00: at
10:53
SPEAKER_00: the
10:53
SPEAKER_00: clients
10:54
SPEAKER_00: that
10:54
SPEAKER_00: I
10:54
SPEAKER_00: was
10:54
SPEAKER_00: working
10:55
SPEAKER_00: on,
10:56
SPEAKER_00: a
10:56
SPEAKER_00: lot
10:56
SPEAKER_00: of
10:57
SPEAKER_00: them
10:57
SPEAKER_00: were
10:57
SPEAKER_00: coming
10:58
SPEAKER_00: in
10:59
SPEAKER_00: with
10:59
SPEAKER_00: unique
11:00
SPEAKER_00: pain
11:00
SPEAKER_00: patterns,
11:01
SPEAKER_00: meaning
11:02
SPEAKER_00: um
11:03
SPEAKER_00: their
11:03
SPEAKER_00: trigger
11:04
SPEAKER_00: points
11:05
SPEAKER_00: did
11:05
SPEAKER_00: not
11:06
SPEAKER_00: match
11:06
SPEAKER_00: the
11:07
SPEAKER_00: norm.
11:07
SPEAKER_00: They
11:07
SPEAKER_00: were
11:07
SPEAKER_00: in
11:08
SPEAKER_00: a
11:08
SPEAKER_00: completely
11:09
SPEAKER_00: different
11:09
SPEAKER_00: wiring
11:10
SPEAKER_00: system.
11:11
SPEAKER_00: And
11:11
SPEAKER_00: they
11:12
SPEAKER_00: also
11:12
SPEAKER_00: had
11:13
SPEAKER_00: some
11:14
SPEAKER_00: unconscious
11:15
SPEAKER_00: strategies
11:17
SPEAKER_00: for
11:18
SPEAKER_00: protecting
11:18
SPEAKER_00: themselves.
11:20
SPEAKER_00: And
11:20
SPEAKER_00: those
11:21
SPEAKER_00: were
11:21
SPEAKER_00: the
11:21
SPEAKER_00: reasons
11:22
SPEAKER_00: these
11:22
SPEAKER_00: health
11:22
SPEAKER_00: conditions
11:23
SPEAKER_00: could
11:23
SPEAKER_00: not
11:24
SPEAKER_00: shift.
11:25
SPEAKER_00: Or
11:25
SPEAKER_00: they
11:25
SPEAKER_00: had
11:25
SPEAKER_00: a
11:26
SPEAKER_00: lot
11:26
SPEAKER_00: of
11:26
SPEAKER_00: idiopathic
11:27
SPEAKER_00: health
11:27
SPEAKER_00: conditions
11:28
SPEAKER_00: like
11:29
SPEAKER_00: fibromyalgia,
11:30
SPEAKER_00: um,
11:31
SPEAKER_00: migraines,
11:32
SPEAKER_00: they
11:33
SPEAKER_00: had
11:33
SPEAKER_00: um
11:34
SPEAKER_00: always
11:34
SPEAKER_00: digestive
11:35
SPEAKER_00: problems,
11:36
SPEAKER_00: uh
11:36
SPEAKER_00: IBS,
11:37
SPEAKER_00: ulcerative
11:38
SPEAKER_00: colitis,
11:39
SPEAKER_00: uh,
11:40
SPEAKER_00: really
11:40
SPEAKER_00: intense
11:41
SPEAKER_00: things
11:41
SPEAKER_00: that
11:41
SPEAKER_00: caused
11:42
SPEAKER_00: them
11:42
SPEAKER_00: a
11:42
SPEAKER_00: lot
11:42
SPEAKER_00: of
11:43
SPEAKER_00: pain
11:44
SPEAKER_00: and
11:44
SPEAKER_00: a
11:45
SPEAKER_00: lot
11:45
SPEAKER_00: of
11:46
SPEAKER_00: issues
11:47
SPEAKER_00: with
11:48
SPEAKER_00: their
11:48
SPEAKER_00: health.
11:49
SPEAKER_00: And
11:49
SPEAKER_00: they
11:49
SPEAKER_00: were
11:50
SPEAKER_00: not
11:51
SPEAKER_00: getting
11:51
SPEAKER_00: the
11:52
SPEAKER_00: help
11:52
SPEAKER_00: that
11:52
SPEAKER_00: they
11:52
SPEAKER_00: needed.
11:53
SPEAKER_00: And
11:53
SPEAKER_00: so
11:53
SPEAKER_00: I
11:54
SPEAKER_00: knew
11:54
SPEAKER_00: like
11:54
SPEAKER_00: there
11:54
SPEAKER_00: was
11:55
SPEAKER_00: a
11:55
SPEAKER_00: there
11:55
SPEAKER_00: was
11:55
SPEAKER_00: that
11:56
SPEAKER_00: moment
11:56
SPEAKER_00: where
11:56
SPEAKER_00: I
11:56
SPEAKER_00: knew
11:56
SPEAKER_00: this
11:57
SPEAKER_00: was
11:57
SPEAKER_00: the
11:57
SPEAKER_00: thing
11:57
SPEAKER_00: that
11:58
SPEAKER_00: I
11:58
SPEAKER_00: was
11:58
SPEAKER_00: here
11:59
SPEAKER_00: to
11:59
SPEAKER_00: unravel.
12:00
SPEAKER_00: Like
12:00
SPEAKER_00: I
12:00
SPEAKER_00: knew
12:01
SPEAKER_00: this
12:01
SPEAKER_00: was
12:01
SPEAKER_00: a
12:01
SPEAKER_00: mystery
12:02
SPEAKER_00: that
12:02
SPEAKER_00: my
12:03
SPEAKER_00: soul
12:03
SPEAKER_00: was
12:03
SPEAKER_00: like
12:04
SPEAKER_00: leading
12:04
SPEAKER_00: me
12:04
SPEAKER_00: towards
12:05
SPEAKER_00: because
12:05
SPEAKER_00: it
12:06
SPEAKER_00: felt
12:06
SPEAKER_00: like
12:06
SPEAKER_00: suddenly
12:07
SPEAKER_00: like
12:07
SPEAKER_00: the
12:07
SPEAKER_00: invisible
12:08
SPEAKER_00: forces
12:08
SPEAKER_00: of
12:08
SPEAKER_00: the
12:09
SPEAKER_00: universe
12:09
SPEAKER_00: just
12:09
SPEAKER_00: started
12:10
SPEAKER_00: pulling
12:10
SPEAKER_00: me
12:10
SPEAKER_00: forward
12:11
SPEAKER_00: and
12:12
SPEAKER_00: I
12:12
SPEAKER_00: started
12:13
SPEAKER_00: learning
12:13
SPEAKER_00: at
12:13
SPEAKER_00: like
12:14
SPEAKER_00: this
12:14
SPEAKER_00: rapid
12:14
SPEAKER_00: pace.
12:15
SPEAKER_00: And
12:16
SPEAKER_00: it
12:16
SPEAKER_00: was
12:16
SPEAKER_00: as
12:16
SPEAKER_00: if
12:17
SPEAKER_00: I
12:17
SPEAKER_00: was
12:17
SPEAKER_00: remembering
12:18
SPEAKER_00: what
12:18
SPEAKER_00: I
12:18
SPEAKER_00: came
12:19
SPEAKER_00: to
12:19
SPEAKER_00: earth
12:19
SPEAKER_00: to
12:19
SPEAKER_00: do,
12:20
SPEAKER_00: right?
12:20
SPEAKER_00: Like
12:20
SPEAKER_00: I
12:20
SPEAKER_00: think
12:20
SPEAKER_00: we
12:21
SPEAKER_00: all
12:21
SPEAKER_00: have
12:21
SPEAKER_00: a
12:21
SPEAKER_00: purpose,
12:21
SPEAKER_00: and
12:21
SPEAKER_00: it
12:22
SPEAKER_00: it
12:22
SPEAKER_00: felt
12:22
SPEAKER_00: like
12:22
SPEAKER_00: this
12:22
SPEAKER_00: is
12:23
SPEAKER_00: this
12:23
SPEAKER_00: is
12:23
SPEAKER_00: what
12:24
SPEAKER_00: it
12:25
SPEAKER_00: was.
12:30
SPEAKER_00: So
12:31
SPEAKER_00: to
12:31
SPEAKER_00: understand
12:32
SPEAKER_00: why
12:32
SPEAKER_00: the
12:32
SPEAKER_00: body
12:33
SPEAKER_00: carries
12:33
SPEAKER_00: this
12:34
SPEAKER_00: trauma,
12:34
SPEAKER_00: first
12:35
SPEAKER_00: we
12:35
SPEAKER_00: have
12:35
SPEAKER_00: to
12:35
SPEAKER_00: understand
12:36
SPEAKER_00: the
12:36
SPEAKER_00: difference
12:36
SPEAKER_00: between
12:37
SPEAKER_00: an
12:37
SPEAKER_00: explicit
12:38
SPEAKER_00: memory
12:38
SPEAKER_00: and
12:39
SPEAKER_00: an
12:39
SPEAKER_00: implicit
12:40
SPEAKER_00: memory.
12:41
SPEAKER_00: Explicit
12:42
SPEAKER_00: memory
12:42
SPEAKER_00: is
12:43
SPEAKER_00: that
12:43
SPEAKER_00: which
12:43
SPEAKER_00: we
12:43
SPEAKER_00: are
12:44
SPEAKER_00: aware
12:44
SPEAKER_00: of.
12:45
SPEAKER_00: It's
12:45
SPEAKER_00: a
12:45
SPEAKER_00: memory
12:46
SPEAKER_00: that
12:46
SPEAKER_00: you
12:46
SPEAKER_00: can
12:46
SPEAKER_00: recount.
12:48
SPEAKER_00: For
12:48
SPEAKER_00: instance,
12:49
SPEAKER_00: I
12:49
SPEAKER_00: can
12:49
SPEAKER_00: remember
12:50
SPEAKER_00: August
12:50
SPEAKER_00: 5th,
12:51
SPEAKER_00: 2005,
12:52
SPEAKER_00: at
12:52
SPEAKER_00: 12.06
12:53
SPEAKER_00: a.m.,
12:54
SPEAKER_00: my
12:54
SPEAKER_00: daughter
12:54
SPEAKER_00: entered
12:55
SPEAKER_00: the
12:55
SPEAKER_00: world.
12:55
SPEAKER_00: I
12:56
SPEAKER_00: can
12:56
SPEAKER_00: remember
12:56
SPEAKER_00: it
12:57
SPEAKER_00: very,
12:57
SPEAKER_00: very
12:58
SPEAKER_00: clearly.
12:59
SPEAKER_00: This
12:59
SPEAKER_00: memory
13:00
SPEAKER_00: is
13:00
SPEAKER_00: primarily
13:00
SPEAKER_00: stored
13:01
SPEAKER_00: in
13:01
SPEAKER_00: the
13:01
SPEAKER_00: hippocampus
13:02
SPEAKER_00: and
13:02
SPEAKER_00: can
13:02
SPEAKER_00: be
13:03
SPEAKER_00: verbalized.
13:04
SPEAKER_00: But
13:04
SPEAKER_00: there's
13:04
SPEAKER_00: another
13:05
SPEAKER_00: form
13:05
SPEAKER_00: of
13:06
SPEAKER_00: memory
13:06
SPEAKER_00: called
13:07
SPEAKER_00: implicit
13:07
SPEAKER_00: memory,
13:08
SPEAKER_00: which
13:09
SPEAKER_00: operates
13:09
SPEAKER_00: outside
13:10
SPEAKER_00: of
13:10
SPEAKER_00: our
13:10
SPEAKER_00: consciousness.
13:12
SPEAKER_00: This
13:12
SPEAKER_00: memory
13:12
SPEAKER_00: is
13:13
SPEAKER_00: stored
13:13
SPEAKER_00: in
13:13
SPEAKER_00: older,
13:14
SPEAKER_00: more
13:14
SPEAKER_00: primitive
13:15
SPEAKER_00: brain
13:15
SPEAKER_00: structures,
13:16
SPEAKER_00: the
13:16
SPEAKER_00: amygdala,
13:17
SPEAKER_00: brainstem,
13:18
SPEAKER_00: cerebellum,
13:19
SPEAKER_00: and
13:20
SPEAKER_00: importantly
13:20
SPEAKER_00: within
13:21
SPEAKER_00: the
13:21
SPEAKER_00: body
13:21
SPEAKER_00: itself.
13:22
SPEAKER_00: It
13:22
SPEAKER_00: encodes
13:23
SPEAKER_00: not
13:23
SPEAKER_00: the
13:23
SPEAKER_00: narrative
13:24
SPEAKER_00: facts
13:24
SPEAKER_00: of
13:24
SPEAKER_00: the
13:25
SPEAKER_00: trauma,
13:25
SPEAKER_00: but
13:25
SPEAKER_00: the
13:25
SPEAKER_00: sensations,
13:26
SPEAKER_00: the
13:26
SPEAKER_00: emotions,
13:27
SPEAKER_00: and
13:27
SPEAKER_00: the
13:27
SPEAKER_00: physiological
13:28
SPEAKER_00: responses
13:30
SPEAKER_00: that
13:30
SPEAKER_00: accompanied
13:31
SPEAKER_00: it.
13:32
SPEAKER_00: For
13:32
SPEAKER_00: instance,
13:33
SPEAKER_00: when
13:33
SPEAKER_00: I
13:34
SPEAKER_00: was
13:34
SPEAKER_00: in
13:35
SPEAKER_00: uh
13:35
SPEAKER_00: Florida
13:36
SPEAKER_00: at
13:36
SPEAKER_00: Podfest,
13:38
SPEAKER_00: I
13:39
SPEAKER_00: was
13:39
SPEAKER_00: traveling
13:40
SPEAKER_00: alone
13:41
SPEAKER_00: and
13:41
SPEAKER_00: I
13:41
SPEAKER_00: had
13:42
SPEAKER_00: some
13:42
SPEAKER_00: trauma
13:42
SPEAKER_00: happen
13:42
SPEAKER_00: to
13:43
SPEAKER_00: me
13:43
SPEAKER_00: when
13:43
SPEAKER_00: I
13:43
SPEAKER_00: was
13:43
SPEAKER_00: traveling
13:45
SPEAKER_00: within
13:46
SPEAKER_00: the
13:46
SPEAKER_00: last
13:46
SPEAKER_00: five
13:47
SPEAKER_00: years,
13:48
SPEAKER_00: and
13:48
SPEAKER_00: I
13:49
SPEAKER_00: had
13:50
SPEAKER_00: to
13:50
SPEAKER_00: really
13:50
SPEAKER_00: work
13:50
SPEAKER_00: through
13:51
SPEAKER_00: it.
13:51
SPEAKER_00: Now,
13:52
SPEAKER_00: when
13:52
SPEAKER_00: I
13:53
SPEAKER_00: got
13:53
SPEAKER_00: to
13:53
SPEAKER_00: Florida
13:54
SPEAKER_00: and
13:54
SPEAKER_00: I
13:54
SPEAKER_00: got
13:54
SPEAKER_00: to
13:54
SPEAKER_00: my
13:55
SPEAKER_00: hotel,
13:55
SPEAKER_00: it
13:56
SPEAKER_00: was
13:56
SPEAKER_00: a
13:56
SPEAKER_00: very
13:56
SPEAKER_00: similar-looking
13:57
SPEAKER_00: environment
13:58
SPEAKER_00: to
13:58
SPEAKER_00: the
13:59
SPEAKER_00: one
13:59
SPEAKER_00: where
14:00
SPEAKER_00: I
14:00
SPEAKER_00: had
14:00
SPEAKER_00: uh
14:01
SPEAKER_00: been
14:01
SPEAKER_00: drugged.
14:02
SPEAKER_00: And
14:03
SPEAKER_00: I
14:03
SPEAKER_00: didn't
14:04
SPEAKER_00: know
14:04
SPEAKER_00: this
14:05
SPEAKER_00: was
14:05
SPEAKER_00: still
14:05
SPEAKER_00: bothering
14:06
SPEAKER_00: me
14:06
SPEAKER_00: and
14:07
SPEAKER_00: it
14:07
SPEAKER_00: was
14:07
SPEAKER_00: still
14:07
SPEAKER_00: impacting
14:08
SPEAKER_00: the
14:08
SPEAKER_00: way
14:08
SPEAKER_00: that
14:09
SPEAKER_00: I
14:09
SPEAKER_00: make
14:09
SPEAKER_00: decisions.
14:10
SPEAKER_00: Because
14:11
SPEAKER_00: once
14:11
SPEAKER_00: I
14:12
SPEAKER_00: got
14:12
SPEAKER_00: to
14:12
SPEAKER_00: the
14:12
SPEAKER_00: hotel,
14:12
SPEAKER_00: I
14:13
SPEAKER_00: suddenly
14:13
SPEAKER_00: just
14:13
SPEAKER_00: started
14:14
SPEAKER_00: having
14:14
SPEAKER_00: trauma
14:15
SPEAKER_00: tremors
14:17
SPEAKER_00: and
14:18
SPEAKER_00: somatic
14:19
SPEAKER_00: responses
14:20
SPEAKER_00: to
14:20
SPEAKER_00: terror
14:21
SPEAKER_00: that
14:21
SPEAKER_00: I
14:21
SPEAKER_00: wasn't
14:22
SPEAKER_00: having
14:22
SPEAKER_00: a
14:22
SPEAKER_00: memory
14:23
SPEAKER_00: for.
14:23
SPEAKER_00: I
14:23
SPEAKER_00: didn't
14:24
SPEAKER_00: not
14:24
SPEAKER_00: have
14:24
SPEAKER_00: any
14:24
SPEAKER_00: memories.
14:25
SPEAKER_00: I
14:25
SPEAKER_00: was
14:25
SPEAKER_00: not
14:25
SPEAKER_00: hearing
14:26
SPEAKER_00: anything,
14:27
SPEAKER_00: I
14:27
SPEAKER_00: was
14:27
SPEAKER_00: not
14:27
SPEAKER_00: seeing
14:28
SPEAKER_00: anything.
14:28
SPEAKER_00: I
14:29
SPEAKER_00: was
14:29
SPEAKER_00: totally
14:29
SPEAKER_00: unaware
14:31
SPEAKER_00: that
14:31
SPEAKER_00: I
14:32
SPEAKER_00: that
14:32
SPEAKER_00: I
14:33
SPEAKER_00: was
14:33
SPEAKER_00: having
14:33
SPEAKER_00: a
14:33
SPEAKER_00: trauma
14:34
SPEAKER_00: response,
14:34
SPEAKER_00: except
14:35
SPEAKER_00: for
14:35
SPEAKER_00: the
14:35
SPEAKER_00: fact
14:35
SPEAKER_00: that
14:35
SPEAKER_00: I
14:35
SPEAKER_00: treat
14:36
SPEAKER_00: trauma
14:36
SPEAKER_00: and
14:36
SPEAKER_00: I
14:36
SPEAKER_00: knew
14:36
SPEAKER_00: what
14:36
SPEAKER_00: my
14:37
SPEAKER_00: body
14:37
SPEAKER_00: was
14:37
SPEAKER_00: doing.
14:38
SPEAKER_00: And
14:38
SPEAKER_00: so
14:40
SPEAKER_00: I
14:40
SPEAKER_00: was
14:40
SPEAKER_00: having
14:41
SPEAKER_00: a
14:42
SPEAKER_00: felt
14:43
SPEAKER_00: sense
14:44
SPEAKER_00: of
14:45
SPEAKER_00: terror,
14:46
SPEAKER_00: even
14:46
SPEAKER_00: though
14:46
SPEAKER_00: I
14:47
SPEAKER_00: was
14:47
SPEAKER_00: not
14:47
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
14:48
SPEAKER_00: it.
14:49
SPEAKER_00: So
14:50
SPEAKER_00: what
14:51
SPEAKER_00: that
14:51
SPEAKER_00: means
14:52
SPEAKER_00: is
14:53
SPEAKER_00: you
14:53
SPEAKER_00: might
14:53
SPEAKER_00: have
14:54
SPEAKER_00: a
14:54
SPEAKER_00: memory
14:54
SPEAKER_00: in
14:55
SPEAKER_00: your
14:55
SPEAKER_00: field
14:55
SPEAKER_00: of
14:55
SPEAKER_00: awareness
14:56
SPEAKER_00: that
14:57
SPEAKER_00: creates
14:57
SPEAKER_00: a
14:58
SPEAKER_00: physiological
14:59
SPEAKER_00: response,
15:00
SPEAKER_00: but
15:01
SPEAKER_00: you
15:02
SPEAKER_00: might
15:02
SPEAKER_00: not
15:02
SPEAKER_00: remember
15:02
SPEAKER_00: a
15:03
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
15:03
SPEAKER_00: You
15:04
SPEAKER_00: might
15:04
SPEAKER_00: not
15:04
SPEAKER_00: have
15:05
SPEAKER_00: any
15:05
SPEAKER_00: kind
15:06
SPEAKER_00: of
15:07
SPEAKER_00: experience
15:08
SPEAKER_00: of
15:08
SPEAKER_00: a
15:08
SPEAKER_00: trauma
15:09
SPEAKER_00: event.
15:10
SPEAKER_00: Now,
15:10
SPEAKER_00: I
15:11
SPEAKER_00: don't
15:11
SPEAKER_00: want
15:11
SPEAKER_00: to
15:11
SPEAKER_00: make
15:11
SPEAKER_00: this
15:11
SPEAKER_00: too
15:12
SPEAKER_00: complicated,
15:12
SPEAKER_00: but
15:12
SPEAKER_00: we
15:13
SPEAKER_00: can
15:13
SPEAKER_00: also
15:13
SPEAKER_00: inherit
15:14
SPEAKER_00: our
15:14
SPEAKER_00: parents'
15:15
SPEAKER_00: trauma,
15:16
SPEAKER_00: their
15:16
SPEAKER_00: parents
15:17
SPEAKER_00: eight
15:17
SPEAKER_00: generations
15:18
SPEAKER_00: back.
15:18
SPEAKER_00: So
15:19
SPEAKER_00: you
15:19
SPEAKER_00: might
15:19
SPEAKER_00: even
15:20
SPEAKER_00: have
15:20
SPEAKER_00: a
15:20
SPEAKER_00: visceral
15:21
SPEAKER_00: reaction
15:21
SPEAKER_00: to
15:21
SPEAKER_00: something
15:22
SPEAKER_00: that's
15:22
SPEAKER_00: like
15:22
SPEAKER_00: your
15:22
SPEAKER_00: great-great-grandma's.
15:23
SPEAKER_00: So
15:24
SPEAKER_00: we're
15:24
SPEAKER_00: just
15:24
SPEAKER_00: gonna
15:24
SPEAKER_00: put
15:24
SPEAKER_00: a
15:24
SPEAKER_00: pin
15:24
SPEAKER_00: in
15:25
SPEAKER_00: that
15:25
SPEAKER_00: one.
15:25
SPEAKER_00: We'll
15:25
SPEAKER_00: talk
15:25
SPEAKER_00: about
15:26
SPEAKER_00: that
15:26
SPEAKER_00: one
15:26
SPEAKER_00: later.
15:26
SPEAKER_00: But
15:27
SPEAKER_00: I
15:27
SPEAKER_00: just
15:27
SPEAKER_00: wanted
15:27
SPEAKER_00: to
15:27
SPEAKER_00: make
15:28
SPEAKER_00: you
15:28
SPEAKER_00: aware
15:28
SPEAKER_00: that
15:28
SPEAKER_00: your
15:29
SPEAKER_00: body
15:29
SPEAKER_00: might
15:29
SPEAKER_00: be
15:29
SPEAKER_00: remembering
15:30
SPEAKER_00: something
15:30
SPEAKER_00: you
15:30
SPEAKER_00: never
15:31
SPEAKER_00: even
15:31
SPEAKER_00: experienced.
15:33
SPEAKER_00: So
15:33
SPEAKER_00: simultaneously,
15:35
SPEAKER_00: our
15:35
SPEAKER_00: body
15:36
SPEAKER_00: recorded
15:37
SPEAKER_00: something
15:38
SPEAKER_00: else,
15:39
SPEAKER_00: maybe
15:39
SPEAKER_00: like
15:39
SPEAKER_00: a
15:40
SPEAKER_00: terror
15:40
SPEAKER_00: event.
15:41
SPEAKER_00: And
15:41
SPEAKER_00: for
15:41
SPEAKER_00: me,
15:41
SPEAKER_00: it
15:42
SPEAKER_00: was
15:42
SPEAKER_00: very
15:42
SPEAKER_00: terror.
15:43
SPEAKER_00: It
15:43
SPEAKER_00: was
15:43
SPEAKER_00: a
15:44
SPEAKER_00: terror
15:44
SPEAKER_00: event.
15:45
SPEAKER_00: Um,
15:46
SPEAKER_00: and
15:47
SPEAKER_00: so
15:47
SPEAKER_00: I
15:47
SPEAKER_00: would
15:48
SPEAKER_00: have
15:48
SPEAKER_00: panic
15:48
SPEAKER_00: attacks.
15:49
SPEAKER_00: I
15:49
SPEAKER_00: had
15:49
SPEAKER_00: um,
15:50
SPEAKER_00: I
15:50
SPEAKER_00: used
15:50
SPEAKER_00: to
15:50
SPEAKER_00: have
15:50
SPEAKER_00: like
15:51
SPEAKER_00: trauma
15:51
SPEAKER_00: seizures
15:52
SPEAKER_00: and
15:52
SPEAKER_00: I
15:52
SPEAKER_00: used
15:52
SPEAKER_00: to
15:52
SPEAKER_00: have
15:52
SPEAKER_00: ticks
15:53
SPEAKER_00: and
15:53
SPEAKER_00: all
15:53
SPEAKER_00: kinds
15:54
SPEAKER_00: of
15:54
SPEAKER_00: weird
15:54
SPEAKER_00: things
15:55
SPEAKER_00: uh
15:55
SPEAKER_00: after
15:56
SPEAKER_00: I
15:56
SPEAKER_00: had
15:57
SPEAKER_00: these
15:57
SPEAKER_00: this
15:57
SPEAKER_00: big
15:58
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
15:58
SPEAKER_00: And
15:59
SPEAKER_00: I
16:00
SPEAKER_00: and
16:00
SPEAKER_00: I
16:00
SPEAKER_00: was
16:00
SPEAKER_00: having
16:01
SPEAKER_00: them
16:01
SPEAKER_00: come
16:01
SPEAKER_00: up
16:01
SPEAKER_00: again,
16:02
SPEAKER_00: and
16:02
SPEAKER_00: I
16:02
SPEAKER_00: was
16:02
SPEAKER_00: like,
16:02
SPEAKER_00: oh
16:03
SPEAKER_00: no,
16:03
SPEAKER_00: not
16:03
SPEAKER_00: this
16:03
SPEAKER_00: again.
16:04
SPEAKER_00: Like
16:04
SPEAKER_00: I
16:04
SPEAKER_00: were,
16:04
SPEAKER_00: I
16:04
SPEAKER_00: recoded
16:05
SPEAKER_00: the
16:05
SPEAKER_00: heck
16:06
SPEAKER_00: out
16:06
SPEAKER_00: of
16:06
SPEAKER_00: this.
16:07
SPEAKER_00: But
16:07
SPEAKER_00: my
16:07
SPEAKER_00: body
16:08
SPEAKER_00: was
16:08
SPEAKER_00: re-experiencing
16:09
SPEAKER_00: it
16:10
SPEAKER_00: like
16:11
SPEAKER_00: it
16:11
SPEAKER_00: was
16:11
SPEAKER_00: happening
16:12
SPEAKER_00: in
16:12
SPEAKER_00: the
16:12
SPEAKER_00: present
16:12
SPEAKER_00: moment,
16:13
SPEAKER_00: but
16:13
SPEAKER_00: I
16:13
SPEAKER_00: was
16:13
SPEAKER_00: very
16:14
SPEAKER_00: present.
16:14
SPEAKER_00: So
16:15
SPEAKER_00: these
16:15
SPEAKER_00: bodily
16:16
SPEAKER_00: sensations,
16:16
SPEAKER_00: repeated
16:17
SPEAKER_00: dozens
16:18
SPEAKER_00: or
16:18
SPEAKER_00: hundreds
16:18
SPEAKER_00: of
16:18
SPEAKER_00: times
16:19
SPEAKER_00: throughout
16:19
SPEAKER_00: uh,
16:20
SPEAKER_00: like
16:20
SPEAKER_00: let's
16:20
SPEAKER_00: say
16:20
SPEAKER_00: a
16:21
SPEAKER_00: toxic
16:21
SPEAKER_00: relationship,
16:22
SPEAKER_00: toxic
16:23
SPEAKER_00: workplace,
16:24
SPEAKER_00: or
16:24
SPEAKER_00: you
16:24
SPEAKER_00: know,
16:24
SPEAKER_00: even
16:25
SPEAKER_00: in
16:25
SPEAKER_00: your
16:25
SPEAKER_00: family
16:25
SPEAKER_00: of
16:26
SPEAKER_00: origin,
16:26
SPEAKER_00: they
16:26
SPEAKER_00: create
16:27
SPEAKER_00: somatic
16:28
SPEAKER_00: imprints.
16:29
SPEAKER_00: The
16:30
SPEAKER_00: body
16:30
SPEAKER_00: learns
16:30
SPEAKER_00: to
16:31
SPEAKER_00: hold
16:31
SPEAKER_00: itself
16:31
SPEAKER_00: in
16:32
SPEAKER_00: a
16:32
SPEAKER_00: certain
16:32
SPEAKER_00: way,
16:32
SPEAKER_00: to
16:32
SPEAKER_00: breathe
16:33
SPEAKER_00: in
16:33
SPEAKER_00: a
16:33
SPEAKER_00: certain
16:33
SPEAKER_00: way,
16:34
SPEAKER_00: to
16:34
SPEAKER_00: react
16:34
SPEAKER_00: in
16:34
SPEAKER_00: a
16:34
SPEAKER_00: certain
16:35
SPEAKER_00: way.
16:35
SPEAKER_00: And
16:36
SPEAKER_00: these
16:36
SPEAKER_00: patterns
16:36
SPEAKER_00: become
16:37
SPEAKER_00: automatic,
16:38
SPEAKER_00: unconscious,
16:39
SPEAKER_00: and
16:39
SPEAKER_00: they
16:39
SPEAKER_00: persist
16:40
SPEAKER_00: even
16:41
SPEAKER_00: when
16:41
SPEAKER_00: the
16:41
SPEAKER_00: dangerous
16:42
SPEAKER_00: environment
16:43
SPEAKER_00: has
16:43
SPEAKER_00: disappeared.
16:44
SPEAKER_00: At
16:44
SPEAKER_00: the
16:45
SPEAKER_00: core
16:45
SPEAKER_00: of
16:46
SPEAKER_00: somatic
16:46
SPEAKER_00: after
16:47
SPEAKER_00: effects
16:47
SPEAKER_00: lays
16:48
SPEAKER_00: a
16:48
SPEAKER_00: deep
16:48
SPEAKER_00: dysregulation
16:49
SPEAKER_00: of
16:49
SPEAKER_00: the
16:50
SPEAKER_00: automatic
16:51
SPEAKER_00: nervous
16:51
SPEAKER_00: system.
16:52
SPEAKER_00: This
16:52
SPEAKER_00: system,
16:53
SPEAKER_00: which
16:54
SPEAKER_00: regulates
16:54
SPEAKER_00: all
16:55
SPEAKER_00: involuntary
16:56
SPEAKER_00: bodily
16:56
SPEAKER_00: functions,
16:57
SPEAKER_00: your
16:57
SPEAKER_00: heart
16:57
SPEAKER_00: rate,
16:58
SPEAKER_00: respiration,
16:59
SPEAKER_00: digestion,
17:00
SPEAKER_00: temperature,
17:01
SPEAKER_00: immune
17:01
SPEAKER_00: response,
17:02
SPEAKER_00: it
17:02
SPEAKER_00: operates
17:03
SPEAKER_00: in
17:03
SPEAKER_00: two
17:04
SPEAKER_00: main
17:04
SPEAKER_00: modes,
17:04
SPEAKER_00: the
17:04
SPEAKER_00: sympathetic
17:05
SPEAKER_00: system,
17:06
SPEAKER_00: activation,
17:07
SPEAKER_00: mobilization,
17:08
SPEAKER_00: fight
17:08
SPEAKER_00: or
17:08
SPEAKER_00: flight,
17:09
SPEAKER_00: and
17:09
SPEAKER_00: the
17:09
SPEAKER_00: parasympathetic
17:10
SPEAKER_00: system,
17:11
SPEAKER_00: rest,
17:11
SPEAKER_00: digest,
17:12
SPEAKER_00: recovery.
17:13
SPEAKER_00: In
17:14
SPEAKER_00: healthy
17:14
SPEAKER_00: functioning,
17:15
SPEAKER_00: these
17:16
SPEAKER_00: two
17:16
SPEAKER_00: branches
17:17
SPEAKER_00: of
17:17
SPEAKER_00: the
17:17
SPEAKER_00: ANS
17:18
SPEAKER_00: balance
17:19
SPEAKER_00: each
17:19
SPEAKER_00: other
17:20
SPEAKER_00: out.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: The
17:20
SPEAKER_00: sympathetic
17:21
SPEAKER_00: system
17:22
SPEAKER_00: activates
17:22
SPEAKER_00: in
17:22
SPEAKER_00: response
17:23
SPEAKER_00: to
17:23
SPEAKER_00: a
17:23
SPEAKER_00: challenge
17:24
SPEAKER_00: or
17:24
SPEAKER_00: danger,
17:25
SPEAKER_00: mobilizing
17:26
SPEAKER_00: the
17:26
SPEAKER_00: body's
17:26
SPEAKER_00: resources.
17:27
SPEAKER_00: Once
17:28
SPEAKER_00: the
17:28
SPEAKER_00: challenge
17:28
SPEAKER_00: is
17:28
SPEAKER_00: met
17:29
SPEAKER_00: or
17:29
SPEAKER_00: the
17:29
SPEAKER_00: danger
17:30
SPEAKER_00: has
17:30
SPEAKER_00: passed,
17:30
SPEAKER_00: the
17:31
SPEAKER_00: parasympathetic
17:32
SPEAKER_00: system
17:32
SPEAKER_00: should
17:33
SPEAKER_00: take
17:33
SPEAKER_00: over,
17:33
SPEAKER_00: allowing
17:34
SPEAKER_00: the
17:34
SPEAKER_00: body
17:34
SPEAKER_00: to
17:35
SPEAKER_00: rest
17:35
SPEAKER_00: and
17:35
SPEAKER_00: recover.
17:36
SPEAKER_00: This
17:36
SPEAKER_00: cycle
17:36
SPEAKER_00: of
17:37
SPEAKER_00: activation
17:37
SPEAKER_00: and
17:37
SPEAKER_00: recovery
17:38
SPEAKER_00: is
17:38
SPEAKER_00: natural
17:39
SPEAKER_00: and
17:39
SPEAKER_00: healthy.
17:40
SPEAKER_00: But
17:41
SPEAKER_00: in
17:41
SPEAKER_00: the
17:41
SPEAKER_00: context
17:42
SPEAKER_00: of
17:42
SPEAKER_00: prolonged
17:43
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
17:44
SPEAKER_00: abuse,
17:45
SPEAKER_00: this
17:45
SPEAKER_00: cycle
17:46
SPEAKER_00: is
17:46
SPEAKER_00: deeply
17:47
SPEAKER_00: disrupted.
17:48
SPEAKER_00: The
17:48
SPEAKER_00: sympathetic
17:49
SPEAKER_00: system
17:49
SPEAKER_00: remains
17:49
SPEAKER_00: chronically
17:50
SPEAKER_00: activated,
17:51
SPEAKER_00: keeping
17:51
SPEAKER_00: the
17:51
SPEAKER_00: body
17:52
SPEAKER_00: in
17:52
SPEAKER_00: a
17:52
SPEAKER_00: state
17:52
SPEAKER_00: of
17:53
SPEAKER_00: constant
17:53
SPEAKER_00: alert,
17:54
SPEAKER_00: even
17:55
SPEAKER_00: when
17:55
SPEAKER_00: there
17:55
SPEAKER_00: is
17:55
SPEAKER_00: no
17:55
SPEAKER_00: immediate
17:56
SPEAKER_00: danger.
17:59
SPEAKER_00: The
17:59
SPEAKER_00: nervous
18:00
SPEAKER_00: system
18:00
SPEAKER_00: cannot
18:00
SPEAKER_00: return
18:01
SPEAKER_00: to
18:01
SPEAKER_00: a
18:01
SPEAKER_00: state
18:02
SPEAKER_00: of
18:02
SPEAKER_00: rest.
18:03
SPEAKER_00: It's
18:03
SPEAKER_00: as
18:04
SPEAKER_00: if
18:04
SPEAKER_00: the
18:04
SPEAKER_00: accelerator
18:05
SPEAKER_00: is
18:05
SPEAKER_00: constantly
18:06
SPEAKER_00: pressed
18:06
SPEAKER_00: down
18:07
SPEAKER_00: with
18:08
SPEAKER_00: no
18:08
SPEAKER_00: possibility
18:08
SPEAKER_00: of
18:08
SPEAKER_00: hitting
18:09
SPEAKER_00: the
18:09
SPEAKER_00: brakes.
18:11
SPEAKER_00: So
18:11
SPEAKER_00: if
18:11
SPEAKER_00: you've
18:12
SPEAKER_00: ever
18:12
SPEAKER_00: met
18:12
SPEAKER_00: someone
18:13
SPEAKER_00: who's
18:13
SPEAKER_00: constantly
18:14
SPEAKER_00: tense,
18:15
SPEAKER_00: looks
18:15
SPEAKER_00: like
18:15
SPEAKER_00: they're
18:16
SPEAKER_00: always
18:16
SPEAKER_00: ready
18:17
SPEAKER_00: for
18:17
SPEAKER_00: a
18:17
SPEAKER_00: fight
18:18
SPEAKER_00: or
18:18
SPEAKER_00: to
18:18
SPEAKER_00: be
18:18
SPEAKER_00: attacked,
18:19
SPEAKER_00: the
18:19
SPEAKER_00: heart
18:20
SPEAKER_00: beats
18:20
SPEAKER_00: faster.
18:21
SPEAKER_00: I
18:21
SPEAKER_00: usually
18:22
SPEAKER_00: see
18:22
SPEAKER_00: them
18:22
SPEAKER_00: because
18:22
SPEAKER_00: their
18:23
SPEAKER_00: jaw
18:23
SPEAKER_00: is
18:24
SPEAKER_00: clenched,
18:25
SPEAKER_00: they're
18:25
SPEAKER_00: they
18:26
SPEAKER_00: tend
18:26
SPEAKER_00: to
18:26
SPEAKER_00: breathe
18:26
SPEAKER_00: out
18:27
SPEAKER_00: of
18:27
SPEAKER_00: their
18:27
SPEAKER_00: neck,
18:28
SPEAKER_00: and
18:29
SPEAKER_00: um
18:29
SPEAKER_00: they
18:30
SPEAKER_00: they
18:30
SPEAKER_00: they
18:31
SPEAKER_00: look
18:31
SPEAKER_00: like
18:32
SPEAKER_00: they're
18:33
SPEAKER_00: uh
18:34
SPEAKER_00: very
18:35
SPEAKER_00: unhappy,
18:36
SPEAKER_00: not
18:36
SPEAKER_00: unhappy
18:37
SPEAKER_00: because
18:37
SPEAKER_00: a
18:37
SPEAKER_00: lot
18:37
SPEAKER_00: of
18:37
SPEAKER_00: them
18:38
SPEAKER_00: smile,
18:38
SPEAKER_00: but
18:38
SPEAKER_00: there's
18:39
SPEAKER_00: just
18:39
SPEAKER_00: this
18:39
SPEAKER_00: kind
18:39
SPEAKER_00: of
18:40
SPEAKER_00: deep
18:41
SPEAKER_00: um
18:42
SPEAKER_00: sense
18:42
SPEAKER_00: of
18:43
SPEAKER_00: I'm
18:43
SPEAKER_00: not
18:44
SPEAKER_00: hypervigilance,
18:45
SPEAKER_00: like
18:45
SPEAKER_00: they're
18:45
SPEAKER_00: looking
18:45
SPEAKER_00: for
18:46
SPEAKER_00: danger
18:46
SPEAKER_00: all
18:46
SPEAKER_00: of
18:47
SPEAKER_00: the
18:47
SPEAKER_00: time.
18:48
SPEAKER_00: They
18:48
SPEAKER_00: might
18:48
SPEAKER_00: even
18:48
SPEAKER_00: kind
18:49
SPEAKER_00: of
18:49
SPEAKER_00: react
18:49
SPEAKER_00: that
18:50
SPEAKER_00: way
18:50
SPEAKER_00: in
18:50
SPEAKER_00: the
18:50
SPEAKER_00: way
18:51
SPEAKER_00: that
18:51
SPEAKER_00: they
18:51
SPEAKER_00: talk
18:51
SPEAKER_00: to
18:51
SPEAKER_00: you,
18:52
SPEAKER_00: a
18:52
SPEAKER_00: little
18:52
SPEAKER_00: bit
18:52
SPEAKER_00: defensive
18:53
SPEAKER_00: or
18:54
SPEAKER_00: hypercritical.
18:55
SPEAKER_00: This
18:56
SPEAKER_00: chronic
18:56
SPEAKER_00: sympathetic
18:57
SPEAKER_00: activation
18:58
SPEAKER_00: has
18:58
SPEAKER_00: cascading
18:59
SPEAKER_00: consequences
19:00
SPEAKER_00: for
19:00
SPEAKER_00: all
19:00
SPEAKER_00: body
19:01
SPEAKER_00: systems.
19:01
SPEAKER_00: The
19:02
SPEAKER_00: cardiovascular
19:03
SPEAKER_00: system
19:03
SPEAKER_00: is
19:03
SPEAKER_00: overworked,
19:04
SPEAKER_00: creating
19:05
SPEAKER_00: an
19:05
SPEAKER_00: increased
19:05
SPEAKER_00: risk
19:06
SPEAKER_00: of
19:06
SPEAKER_00: hypertension
19:06
SPEAKER_00: and
19:07
SPEAKER_00: heart
19:07
SPEAKER_00: problems.
19:08
SPEAKER_00: The
19:08
SPEAKER_00: digestive
19:09
SPEAKER_00: system,
19:09
SPEAKER_00: which
19:09
SPEAKER_00: functions
19:10
SPEAKER_00: optimally
19:10
SPEAKER_00: in
19:11
SPEAKER_00: parasympathetic
19:12
SPEAKER_00: mode,
19:12
SPEAKER_00: is
19:12
SPEAKER_00: constantly
19:13
SPEAKER_00: disrupted.
19:14
SPEAKER_00: This
19:14
SPEAKER_00: is
19:14
SPEAKER_00: why
19:15
SPEAKER_00: I
19:15
SPEAKER_00: had
19:15
SPEAKER_00: horrific
19:16
SPEAKER_00: ulcerative
19:17
SPEAKER_00: colitis,
19:18
SPEAKER_00: I
19:18
SPEAKER_00: believe,
19:19
SPEAKER_00: because
19:19
SPEAKER_00: I
19:19
SPEAKER_00: had
19:20
SPEAKER_00: this
19:21
SPEAKER_00: chronic
19:21
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
19:23
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
19:24
SPEAKER_00: The
19:24
SPEAKER_00: immune
19:24
SPEAKER_00: system
19:25
SPEAKER_00: is
19:25
SPEAKER_00: completely
19:26
SPEAKER_00: weakened
19:27
SPEAKER_00: by
19:27
SPEAKER_00: chronic
19:28
SPEAKER_00: stress,
19:28
SPEAKER_00: and
19:28
SPEAKER_00: that
19:29
SPEAKER_00: makes
19:29
SPEAKER_00: the
19:29
SPEAKER_00: person
19:29
SPEAKER_00: more
19:30
SPEAKER_00: vulnerable
19:30
SPEAKER_00: to
19:30
SPEAKER_00: infections
19:31
SPEAKER_00: and
19:31
SPEAKER_00: illnesses.
19:32
SPEAKER_00: And
19:32
SPEAKER_00: the
19:32
SPEAKER_00: endocrine
19:33
SPEAKER_00: system
19:34
SPEAKER_00: produces
19:34
SPEAKER_00: abnormally
19:35
SPEAKER_00: high
19:35
SPEAKER_00: levels
19:35
SPEAKER_00: of
19:36
SPEAKER_00: cortisol,
19:37
SPEAKER_00: the
19:37
SPEAKER_00: stress
19:37
SPEAKER_00: hormone,
19:38
SPEAKER_00: creating
19:38
SPEAKER_00: widespread
19:39
SPEAKER_00: hormonal
19:40
SPEAKER_00: imbalance.
19:41
SPEAKER_00: The
19:42
SPEAKER_00: somatic
19:42
SPEAKER_00: after
19:43
SPEAKER_00: effects
19:43
SPEAKER_00: of
19:43
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
19:44
SPEAKER_00: abuse
19:45
SPEAKER_00: are
19:45
SPEAKER_00: not
19:45
SPEAKER_00: abstract
19:46
SPEAKER_00: or
19:46
SPEAKER_00: theoretical.
19:47
SPEAKER_00: They
19:47
SPEAKER_00: manifest
19:48
SPEAKER_00: as
19:48
SPEAKER_00: concrete
19:49
SPEAKER_00: and
19:49
SPEAKER_00: often
19:50
SPEAKER_00: debilitating
19:51
SPEAKER_00: physical
19:51
SPEAKER_00: symptoms
19:52
SPEAKER_00: that
19:53
SPEAKER_00: significantly
19:53
SPEAKER_00: affect
19:54
SPEAKER_00: the
19:54
SPEAKER_00: survivor's
19:55
SPEAKER_00: daily
19:55
SPEAKER_00: life.
19:56
SPEAKER_00: One
19:57
SPEAKER_00: of
19:57
SPEAKER_00: the
19:57
SPEAKER_00: most
19:57
SPEAKER_00: common
19:58
SPEAKER_00: and
19:58
SPEAKER_00: frustrating
19:58
SPEAKER_00: manifestations
19:59
SPEAKER_00: is
20:00
SPEAKER_00: the
20:00
SPEAKER_00: development
20:00
SPEAKER_00: of
20:01
SPEAKER_00: chronic
20:01
SPEAKER_00: pain.
20:02
SPEAKER_00: Now,
20:03
SPEAKER_00: this
20:03
SPEAKER_00: is
20:04
SPEAKER_00: what
20:04
SPEAKER_00: led
20:05
SPEAKER_00: me
20:05
SPEAKER_00: to
20:06
SPEAKER_00: working
20:06
SPEAKER_00: with
20:06
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
20:07
SPEAKER_00: abuse
20:08
SPEAKER_00: because
20:08
SPEAKER_00: I
20:09
SPEAKER_00: saw
20:09
SPEAKER_00: that
20:09
SPEAKER_00: chronic
20:10
SPEAKER_00: pain
20:10
SPEAKER_00: sufferers
20:12
SPEAKER_00: had
20:13
SPEAKER_00: in
20:13
SPEAKER_00: some
20:13
SPEAKER_00: place
20:14
SPEAKER_00: in
20:14
SPEAKER_00: their
20:14
SPEAKER_00: life
20:15
SPEAKER_00: some
20:15
SPEAKER_00: form
20:16
SPEAKER_00: of
20:16
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
20:17
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
20:18
SPEAKER_00: This
20:18
SPEAKER_00: does
20:18
SPEAKER_00: not
20:18
SPEAKER_00: have
20:19
SPEAKER_00: to
20:19
SPEAKER_00: be
20:19
SPEAKER_00: in
20:19
SPEAKER_00: the
20:19
SPEAKER_00: home.
20:20
SPEAKER_00: This
20:21
SPEAKER_00: can
20:21
SPEAKER_00: be
20:21
SPEAKER_00: in
20:21
SPEAKER_00: your
20:22
SPEAKER_00: workplace.
20:22
SPEAKER_00: It
20:23
SPEAKER_00: could
20:23
SPEAKER_00: be
20:24
SPEAKER_00: from
20:25
SPEAKER_00: your
20:26
SPEAKER_00: medical
20:26
SPEAKER_00: system,
20:27
SPEAKER_00: a
20:27
SPEAKER_00: school
20:28
SPEAKER_00: system.
20:28
SPEAKER_00: It
20:28
SPEAKER_00: could
20:28
SPEAKER_00: be
20:29
SPEAKER_00: from
20:29
SPEAKER_00: the
20:29
SPEAKER_00: PTA,
20:30
SPEAKER_00: a
20:30
SPEAKER_00: mom's
20:30
SPEAKER_00: group.
20:31
SPEAKER_00: It
20:32
SPEAKER_00: can
20:32
SPEAKER_00: be
20:32
SPEAKER_00: anywhere.
20:33
SPEAKER_00: So
20:33
SPEAKER_00: don't
20:34
SPEAKER_00: be
20:34
SPEAKER_00: closed-minded
20:35
SPEAKER_00: when
20:36
SPEAKER_00: you're
20:36
SPEAKER_00: thinking,
20:37
SPEAKER_00: oh,
20:37
SPEAKER_00: I
20:37
SPEAKER_00: do
20:37
SPEAKER_00: have
20:38
SPEAKER_00: this,
20:38
SPEAKER_00: but
20:39
SPEAKER_00: I
20:39
SPEAKER_00: don't
20:39
SPEAKER_00: have,
20:40
SPEAKER_00: I'm
20:40
SPEAKER_00: not
20:40
SPEAKER_00: married
20:40
SPEAKER_00: to
20:40
SPEAKER_00: a
20:41
SPEAKER_00: narcissist.
20:41
SPEAKER_00: My
20:41
SPEAKER_00: parents
20:42
SPEAKER_00: are
20:42
SPEAKER_00: lovely
20:43
SPEAKER_00: people.
20:43
SPEAKER_00: You
20:44
SPEAKER_00: could
20:44
SPEAKER_00: be
20:44
SPEAKER_00: receiving
20:45
SPEAKER_00: it
20:45
SPEAKER_00: somewhere
20:46
SPEAKER_00: else.
20:46
SPEAKER_00: So
20:47
SPEAKER_00: if
20:47
SPEAKER_00: this
20:47
SPEAKER_00: is
20:47
SPEAKER_00: you,
20:48
SPEAKER_00: I'm
20:48
SPEAKER_00: just
20:48
SPEAKER_00: inviting
20:49
SPEAKER_00: you
20:49
SPEAKER_00: to
20:49
SPEAKER_00: think
20:50
SPEAKER_00: about
20:50
SPEAKER_00: other
20:51
SPEAKER_00: places
20:52
SPEAKER_00: you
20:52
SPEAKER_00: might
20:52
SPEAKER_00: be
20:52
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
20:53
SPEAKER_00: it.
20:54
SPEAKER_00: Because
20:54
SPEAKER_00: chronic
20:55
SPEAKER_00: pain
20:55
SPEAKER_00: without
20:56
SPEAKER_00: an
20:56
SPEAKER_00: unidentifiable
20:57
SPEAKER_00: medical
20:58
SPEAKER_00: cause
20:58
SPEAKER_00: is
20:58
SPEAKER_00: often
20:59
SPEAKER_00: linked
21:00
SPEAKER_00: to
21:00
SPEAKER_00: some
21:01
SPEAKER_00: form
21:01
SPEAKER_00: of
21:01
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
21:03
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
21:04
SPEAKER_00: So
21:04
SPEAKER_00: this
21:04
SPEAKER_00: pain
21:05
SPEAKER_00: is
21:05
SPEAKER_00: very
21:05
SPEAKER_00: real,
21:06
SPEAKER_00: it's
21:06
SPEAKER_00: not
21:07
SPEAKER_00: imaginary,
21:08
SPEAKER_00: but
21:08
SPEAKER_00: it
21:09
SPEAKER_00: does
21:09
SPEAKER_00: not
21:10
SPEAKER_00: result
21:10
SPEAKER_00: from
21:10
SPEAKER_00: a
21:10
SPEAKER_00: tissue
21:11
SPEAKER_00: injury
21:11
SPEAKER_00: or
21:12
SPEAKER_00: detectable
21:12
SPEAKER_00: organic
21:13
SPEAKER_00: pathology.
21:14
SPEAKER_00: It
21:14
SPEAKER_00: is
21:14
SPEAKER_00: the
21:14
SPEAKER_00: somatic
21:15
SPEAKER_00: expression
21:16
SPEAKER_00: of
21:16
SPEAKER_00: unresolved
21:16
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
21:17
SPEAKER_00: I
21:18
SPEAKER_00: have
21:18
SPEAKER_00: many
21:18
SPEAKER_00: books
21:19
SPEAKER_00: that
21:19
SPEAKER_00: will
21:20
SPEAKER_00: help
21:20
SPEAKER_00: you
21:20
SPEAKER_00: communicate
21:21
SPEAKER_00: to
21:21
SPEAKER_00: the
21:22
SPEAKER_00: part
21:22
SPEAKER_00: of
21:22
SPEAKER_00: the
21:22
SPEAKER_00: body
21:23
SPEAKER_00: so
21:23
SPEAKER_00: that
21:23
SPEAKER_00: you
21:24
SPEAKER_00: can
21:24
SPEAKER_00: see
21:24
SPEAKER_00: what
21:25
SPEAKER_00: the
21:25
SPEAKER_00: body
21:26
SPEAKER_00: is
21:26
SPEAKER_00: holding
21:26
SPEAKER_00: in
21:27
SPEAKER_00: that
21:27
SPEAKER_00: area.
21:28
SPEAKER_00: And
21:28
SPEAKER_00: it
21:28
SPEAKER_00: helps
21:29
SPEAKER_00: you
21:29
SPEAKER_00: understand
21:30
SPEAKER_00: the
21:30
SPEAKER_00: trauma
21:30
SPEAKER_00: behind
21:31
SPEAKER_00: the
21:31
SPEAKER_00: disease.
21:32
SPEAKER_00: And
21:32
SPEAKER_00: um
21:33
SPEAKER_00: I
21:33
SPEAKER_00: have,
21:34
SPEAKER_00: oh,
21:34
SPEAKER_00: I
21:34
SPEAKER_00: think
21:35
SPEAKER_00: the
21:35
SPEAKER_00: there's
21:35
SPEAKER_00: like
21:35
SPEAKER_00: the
21:36
SPEAKER_00: healing
21:36
SPEAKER_00: questions
21:37
SPEAKER_00: guide.
21:37
SPEAKER_00: There's
21:38
SPEAKER_00: another
21:38
SPEAKER_00: book
21:39
SPEAKER_00: about
21:39
SPEAKER_00: chronic
21:39
SPEAKER_00: illness,
21:40
SPEAKER_00: but
21:40
SPEAKER_00: there's
21:40
SPEAKER_00: a
21:40
SPEAKER_00: there's
21:41
SPEAKER_00: a
21:41
SPEAKER_00: lot
21:41
SPEAKER_00: of
21:41
SPEAKER_00: books
21:41
SPEAKER_00: out
21:42
SPEAKER_00: there,
21:42
SPEAKER_00: and
21:42
SPEAKER_00: I
21:42
SPEAKER_00: can
21:42
SPEAKER_00: put
21:42
SPEAKER_00: some
21:43
SPEAKER_00: links
21:43
SPEAKER_00: down
21:43
SPEAKER_00: below
21:44
SPEAKER_00: that
21:44
SPEAKER_00: will
21:44
SPEAKER_00: help
21:45
SPEAKER_00: you
21:45
SPEAKER_00: understand,
21:46
SPEAKER_00: like,
21:46
SPEAKER_00: oh,
21:47
SPEAKER_00: okay,
21:47
SPEAKER_00: so
21:47
SPEAKER_00: these
21:48
SPEAKER_00: are
21:48
SPEAKER_00: questions
21:48
SPEAKER_00: I
21:48
SPEAKER_00: can
21:49
SPEAKER_00: ask
21:49
SPEAKER_00: myself
21:50
SPEAKER_00: to
21:50
SPEAKER_00: understand
21:51
SPEAKER_00: what
21:51
SPEAKER_00: my
21:51
SPEAKER_00: body's
21:52
SPEAKER_00: trying
21:52
SPEAKER_00: to
21:52
SPEAKER_00: tell
21:53
SPEAKER_00: me.
21:53
SPEAKER_00: Chronic
21:54
SPEAKER_00: muscle
21:55
SPEAKER_00: tension
21:55
SPEAKER_00: in
21:55
SPEAKER_00: particular
21:56
SPEAKER_00: is
21:56
SPEAKER_00: very
21:57
SPEAKER_00: common.
21:57
SPEAKER_00: Shoulders
21:58
SPEAKER_00: rise
21:58
SPEAKER_00: and
21:58
SPEAKER_00: stiffen
21:59
SPEAKER_00: into
21:59
SPEAKER_00: a
22:00
SPEAKER_00: defensive
22:00
SPEAKER_00: position,
22:01
SPEAKER_00: the
22:01
SPEAKER_00: neck
22:01
SPEAKER_00: tightens,
22:02
SPEAKER_00: creating
22:02
SPEAKER_00: persistent
22:03
SPEAKER_00: tension
22:03
SPEAKER_00: headaches,
22:04
SPEAKER_00: the
22:04
SPEAKER_00: jaw
22:05
SPEAKER_00: clenches,
22:05
SPEAKER_00: sometimes
22:06
SPEAKER_00: to
22:06
SPEAKER_00: the
22:06
SPEAKER_00: point
22:06
SPEAKER_00: of
22:07
SPEAKER_00: developing
22:07
SPEAKER_00: uh
22:08
SPEAKER_00: TMJD
22:09
SPEAKER_00: or
22:10
SPEAKER_00: temporomandibular
22:11
SPEAKER_00: joint
22:11
SPEAKER_00: disorders,
22:12
SPEAKER_00: the
22:12
SPEAKER_00: lower
22:13
SPEAKER_00: back
22:13
SPEAKER_00: tightens,
22:14
SPEAKER_00: literally
22:15
SPEAKER_00: carrying
22:15
SPEAKER_00: the
22:15
SPEAKER_00: weight
22:16
SPEAKER_00: of
22:16
SPEAKER_00: emotional
22:16
SPEAKER_00: stress.
22:17
SPEAKER_00: I
22:17
SPEAKER_00: see
22:17
SPEAKER_00: a
22:17
SPEAKER_00: lot
22:18
SPEAKER_00: of
22:18
SPEAKER_00: hip
22:18
SPEAKER_00: pain,
22:19
SPEAKER_00: I
22:19
SPEAKER_00: see
22:20
SPEAKER_00: a
22:20
SPEAKER_00: lot
22:20
SPEAKER_00: of
22:20
SPEAKER_00: shoulder
22:21
SPEAKER_00: pain
22:22
SPEAKER_00: because
22:22
SPEAKER_00: they're
22:22
SPEAKER_00: like
22:22
SPEAKER_00: carrying
22:23
SPEAKER_00: the
22:23
SPEAKER_00: burden.
22:24
SPEAKER_00: Uh,
22:25
SPEAKER_00: and
22:25
SPEAKER_00: it's
22:26
SPEAKER_00: it's
22:26
SPEAKER_00: no
22:27
SPEAKER_00: joke
22:28
SPEAKER_00: what
22:28
SPEAKER_00: people
22:28
SPEAKER_00: with
22:29
SPEAKER_00: chronic
22:30
SPEAKER_00: pain
22:31
SPEAKER_00: are
22:31
SPEAKER_00: going
22:32
SPEAKER_00: through
22:32
SPEAKER_00: because
22:33
SPEAKER_00: they
22:33
SPEAKER_00: feel
22:34
SPEAKER_00: crazy,
22:34
SPEAKER_00: because
22:35
SPEAKER_00: they're
22:35
SPEAKER_00: like,
22:35
SPEAKER_00: I
22:35
SPEAKER_00: can't,
22:36
SPEAKER_00: I
22:36
SPEAKER_00: know
22:36
SPEAKER_00: I
22:36
SPEAKER_00: have
22:37
SPEAKER_00: pain,
22:37
SPEAKER_00: but
22:38
SPEAKER_00: nobody
22:38
SPEAKER_00: seems
22:38
SPEAKER_00: to
22:39
SPEAKER_00: be
22:39
SPEAKER_00: able
22:39
SPEAKER_00: to
22:39
SPEAKER_00: help
22:40
SPEAKER_00: me
22:40
SPEAKER_00: get
22:41
SPEAKER_00: to
22:41
SPEAKER_00: the
22:41
SPEAKER_00: bottom
22:42
SPEAKER_00: of
22:42
SPEAKER_00: it.
22:42
SPEAKER_00: And
22:43
SPEAKER_00: I'll
22:44
SPEAKER_00: just
22:44
SPEAKER_00: say
22:44
SPEAKER_00: that
22:44
SPEAKER_00: the
22:44
SPEAKER_00: pain
22:45
SPEAKER_00: serves
22:45
SPEAKER_00: as
22:46
SPEAKER_00: a
22:46
SPEAKER_00: psychological
22:47
SPEAKER_00: function.
22:48
SPEAKER_00: Now,
22:48
SPEAKER_00: I'm
22:48
SPEAKER_00: not
22:48
SPEAKER_00: saying
22:49
SPEAKER_00: all
22:49
SPEAKER_00: pain
22:49
SPEAKER_00: is
22:49
SPEAKER_00: like
22:49
SPEAKER_00: this
22:50
SPEAKER_00: because
22:50
SPEAKER_00: I
22:50
SPEAKER_00: treat
22:50
SPEAKER_00: a
22:50
SPEAKER_00: lot
22:51
SPEAKER_00: of
22:51
SPEAKER_00: low
22:51
SPEAKER_00: back
22:51
SPEAKER_00: pain
22:52
SPEAKER_00: where
22:52
SPEAKER_00: somebody
22:52
SPEAKER_00: was
22:53
SPEAKER_00: just
22:53
SPEAKER_00: doing
22:53
SPEAKER_00: something
22:53
SPEAKER_00: stupid
22:54
SPEAKER_00: at
22:54
SPEAKER_00: the
22:54
SPEAKER_00: gym
22:54
SPEAKER_00: and
22:54
SPEAKER_00: they
22:54
SPEAKER_00: threw
22:55
SPEAKER_00: their
22:55
SPEAKER_00: back
22:55
SPEAKER_00: out.
22:56
SPEAKER_00: So,
22:56
SPEAKER_00: you
22:56
SPEAKER_00: know,
22:57
SPEAKER_00: that's
22:57
SPEAKER_00: common
22:58
SPEAKER_00: too.
22:58
SPEAKER_00: But
22:58
SPEAKER_00: if
22:59
SPEAKER_00: it's
22:59
SPEAKER_00: a
22:59
SPEAKER_00: chronic
23:00
SPEAKER_00: repetitive
23:01
SPEAKER_00: Issue,
23:02
SPEAKER_00: we
23:02
SPEAKER_00: cannot
23:03
SPEAKER_00: ignore
23:04
SPEAKER_00: the
23:05
SPEAKER_00: psychological,
23:06
SPEAKER_00: emotional,
23:06
SPEAKER_00: and
23:06
SPEAKER_00: energetic
23:07
SPEAKER_00: imprint
23:09
SPEAKER_00: that
23:09
SPEAKER_00: the
23:10
SPEAKER_00: body
23:10
SPEAKER_00: is
23:10
SPEAKER_00: trying
23:10
SPEAKER_00: to
23:11
SPEAKER_00: communicate,
23:11
SPEAKER_00: the
23:12
SPEAKER_00: only
23:12
SPEAKER_00: way
23:12
SPEAKER_00: it
23:13
SPEAKER_00: knows
23:13
SPEAKER_00: how.
23:14
SPEAKER_00: So
23:15
SPEAKER_00: oftentimes
23:15
SPEAKER_00: the
23:16
SPEAKER_00: body
23:16
SPEAKER_00: will
23:16
SPEAKER_00: communicate
23:17
SPEAKER_00: something
23:17
SPEAKER_00: that
23:17
SPEAKER_00: the
23:18
SPEAKER_00: mind
23:18
SPEAKER_00: cannot
23:19
SPEAKER_00: or
23:19
SPEAKER_00: does
23:19
SPEAKER_00: not
23:20
SPEAKER_00: want
23:20
SPEAKER_00: to
23:20
SPEAKER_00: acknowledge.
23:21
SPEAKER_00: For
23:22
SPEAKER_00: instance,
23:23
SPEAKER_00: my
23:23
SPEAKER_00: um
23:24
SPEAKER_00: intuition
23:24
SPEAKER_00: keeps
23:25
SPEAKER_00: telling
23:26
SPEAKER_00: me
23:26
SPEAKER_00: to
23:27
SPEAKER_00: talk
23:27
SPEAKER_00: more
23:27
SPEAKER_00: about
23:28
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
23:29
SPEAKER_00: abuse
23:29
SPEAKER_00: and
23:30
SPEAKER_00: to
23:30
SPEAKER_00: launch
23:31
SPEAKER_00: a
23:31
SPEAKER_00: coaching
23:32
SPEAKER_00: program
23:32
SPEAKER_00: specifically
23:33
SPEAKER_00: designed
23:33
SPEAKER_00: to
23:34
SPEAKER_00: help
23:34
SPEAKER_00: people
23:34
SPEAKER_00: break
23:34
SPEAKER_00: free
23:35
SPEAKER_00: from
23:35
SPEAKER_00: the
23:35
SPEAKER_00: prison
23:35
SPEAKER_00: of
23:36
SPEAKER_00: narcissism.
23:37
SPEAKER_00: And
23:37
SPEAKER_00: I
23:37
SPEAKER_00: have
23:38
SPEAKER_00: not
23:38
SPEAKER_00: wanted
23:38
SPEAKER_00: to
23:38
SPEAKER_00: do
23:38
SPEAKER_00: it.
23:39
SPEAKER_00: I
23:39
SPEAKER_00: have
23:39
SPEAKER_00: been
23:39
SPEAKER_00: stubborn.
23:40
SPEAKER_00: Like,
23:41
SPEAKER_00: but
23:41
SPEAKER_00: what
23:41
SPEAKER_00: I
23:42
SPEAKER_00: realized
23:42
SPEAKER_00: was
23:42
SPEAKER_00: that
23:43
SPEAKER_00: it
23:43
SPEAKER_00: was
23:43
SPEAKER_00: a
23:43
SPEAKER_00: somatic
23:44
SPEAKER_00: response
23:45
SPEAKER_00: to
23:45
SPEAKER_00: not
23:46
SPEAKER_00: confronting
23:47
SPEAKER_00: narcissists.
23:48
SPEAKER_00: It
23:48
SPEAKER_00: was
23:48
SPEAKER_00: a
23:48
SPEAKER_00: defense
23:49
SPEAKER_00: strategy
23:50
SPEAKER_00: to
23:50
SPEAKER_00: keep
23:51
SPEAKER_00: me
23:51
SPEAKER_00: safe.
23:52
SPEAKER_00: So
23:52
SPEAKER_00: as
23:52
SPEAKER_00: I'm
23:53
SPEAKER_00: going
23:53
SPEAKER_00: through
23:53
SPEAKER_00: my
23:54
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
23:55
SPEAKER_00: abuse
23:55
SPEAKER_00: recovery
23:56
SPEAKER_00: certification
23:57
SPEAKER_00: program,
23:57
SPEAKER_00: I'm
23:58
SPEAKER_00: listening
23:58
SPEAKER_00: to
23:58
SPEAKER_00: this
23:59
SPEAKER_00: and
23:59
SPEAKER_00: I'm
23:59
SPEAKER_00: getting
23:59
SPEAKER_00: triggered
24:00
SPEAKER_00: because,
24:00
SPEAKER_00: and
24:01
SPEAKER_00: I
24:01
SPEAKER_00: don't
24:01
SPEAKER_00: like
24:01
SPEAKER_00: saying
24:01
SPEAKER_00: triggered,
24:02
SPEAKER_00: I'll
24:02
SPEAKER_00: say
24:02
SPEAKER_00: activated.
24:03
SPEAKER_00: I
24:03
SPEAKER_00: think
24:04
SPEAKER_00: triggered
24:04
SPEAKER_00: is
24:04
SPEAKER_00: overused.
24:05
SPEAKER_00: Um,
24:06
SPEAKER_00: but
24:06
SPEAKER_00: I'm
24:07
SPEAKER_00: having
24:08
SPEAKER_00: a
24:08
SPEAKER_00: somatic
24:09
SPEAKER_00: reaction
24:10
SPEAKER_00: to
24:10
SPEAKER_00: it.
24:10
SPEAKER_00: Like
24:11
SPEAKER_00: last
24:11
SPEAKER_00: night,
24:12
SPEAKER_00: it
24:13
SPEAKER_00: was
24:13
SPEAKER_00: the
24:13
SPEAKER_00: section
24:14
SPEAKER_00: on,
24:14
SPEAKER_00: you
24:14
SPEAKER_00: know,
24:14
SPEAKER_00: helping
24:15
SPEAKER_00: them
24:15
SPEAKER_00: prepare
24:15
SPEAKER_00: to
24:16
SPEAKER_00: leave.
24:16
SPEAKER_00: And
24:16
SPEAKER_00: I
24:17
SPEAKER_00: was
24:17
SPEAKER_00: remembering
24:18
SPEAKER_00: the
24:19
SPEAKER_00: whole
24:19
SPEAKER_00: like
24:20
SPEAKER_00: last
24:20
SPEAKER_00: year
24:20
SPEAKER_00: of
24:21
SPEAKER_00: my
24:21
SPEAKER_00: marriage
24:22
SPEAKER_00: to
24:22
SPEAKER_00: my
24:22
SPEAKER_00: kids'
24:23
SPEAKER_00: dad.
24:24
SPEAKER_00: And
24:25
SPEAKER_00: it
24:26
SPEAKER_00: was
24:26
SPEAKER_00: awful.
24:26
SPEAKER_00: Like
24:27
SPEAKER_00: I
24:27
SPEAKER_00: was,
24:27
SPEAKER_00: you
24:27
SPEAKER_00: know,
24:28
SPEAKER_00: secretly
24:28
SPEAKER_00: hoarding
24:29
SPEAKER_00: money
24:30
SPEAKER_00: to
24:30
SPEAKER_00: get
24:30
SPEAKER_00: out.
24:31
SPEAKER_00: I
24:31
SPEAKER_00: was
24:31
SPEAKER_00: um
24:32
SPEAKER_00: building
24:32
SPEAKER_00: a
24:32
SPEAKER_00: business
24:33
SPEAKER_00: so
24:33
SPEAKER_00: that
24:33
SPEAKER_00: I
24:34
SPEAKER_00: could
24:34
SPEAKER_00: support
24:34
SPEAKER_00: my
24:34
SPEAKER_00: kids.
24:35
SPEAKER_00: I
24:35
SPEAKER_00: knew
24:35
SPEAKER_00: I
24:35
SPEAKER_00: wouldn't
24:35
SPEAKER_00: get
24:35
SPEAKER_00: any
24:36
SPEAKER_00: financial
24:36
SPEAKER_00: support.
24:36
SPEAKER_00: I
24:36
SPEAKER_00: knew
24:37
SPEAKER_00: he'd
24:37
SPEAKER_00: come
24:37
SPEAKER_00: after
24:37
SPEAKER_00: me
24:37
SPEAKER_00: for
24:38
SPEAKER_00: everything
24:38
SPEAKER_00: I
24:38
SPEAKER_00: had.
24:39
SPEAKER_00: I
24:39
SPEAKER_00: knew
24:39
SPEAKER_00: he
24:40
SPEAKER_00: would
24:40
SPEAKER_00: try
24:40
SPEAKER_00: to
24:40
SPEAKER_00: destroy
24:41
SPEAKER_00: me
24:41
SPEAKER_00: the
24:41
SPEAKER_00: second
24:42
SPEAKER_00: I
24:42
SPEAKER_00: asked
24:42
SPEAKER_00: for
24:43
SPEAKER_00: divorce.
24:44
SPEAKER_00: And
24:45
SPEAKER_00: I
24:45
SPEAKER_00: was
24:45
SPEAKER_00: scared
24:46
SPEAKER_00: and
24:46
SPEAKER_00: I
24:47
SPEAKER_00: forgot
24:48
SPEAKER_00: how
24:48
SPEAKER_00: bad
24:49
SPEAKER_00: it
24:49
SPEAKER_00: was.
24:49
SPEAKER_00: I
24:50
SPEAKER_00: forgot
24:51
SPEAKER_00: the,
24:52
SPEAKER_00: you
24:52
SPEAKER_00: know,
24:52
SPEAKER_00: the
24:52
SPEAKER_00: reason
24:53
SPEAKER_00: I
24:53
SPEAKER_00: left
24:53
SPEAKER_00: was
24:54
SPEAKER_00: because
24:54
SPEAKER_00: the
24:54
SPEAKER_00: police
24:54
SPEAKER_00: showed
24:55
SPEAKER_00: up
24:55
SPEAKER_00: and
24:55
SPEAKER_00: gave
24:56
SPEAKER_00: me
24:56
SPEAKER_00: a
24:56
SPEAKER_00: long
24:57
SPEAKER_00: talk,
24:57
SPEAKER_00: actually,
24:57
SPEAKER_00: a
24:58
SPEAKER_00: short
24:58
SPEAKER_00: talk
24:58
SPEAKER_00: with
24:59
SPEAKER_00: a
24:59
SPEAKER_00: very
24:59
SPEAKER_00: long
24:59
SPEAKER_00: message.
25:00
SPEAKER_00: It
25:01
SPEAKER_00: they
25:01
SPEAKER_00: basically
25:01
SPEAKER_00: just
25:02
SPEAKER_00: said,
25:02
SPEAKER_00: man,
25:02
SPEAKER_00: there
25:02
SPEAKER_00: comes
25:03
SPEAKER_00: a
25:03
SPEAKER_00: time
25:03
SPEAKER_00: in
25:03
SPEAKER_00: everybody's
25:04
SPEAKER_00: life
25:04
SPEAKER_00: where
25:04
SPEAKER_00: you
25:04
SPEAKER_00: have
25:05
SPEAKER_00: to
25:05
SPEAKER_00: make
25:05
SPEAKER_00: some
25:05
SPEAKER_00: hard
25:05
SPEAKER_00: choices.
25:06
SPEAKER_00: And
25:06
SPEAKER_00: today
25:06
SPEAKER_00: is
25:06
SPEAKER_00: that
25:07
SPEAKER_00: choice
25:07
SPEAKER_00: for
25:07
SPEAKER_00: you
25:07
SPEAKER_00: because
25:08
SPEAKER_00: we
25:08
SPEAKER_00: cannot
25:08
SPEAKER_00: protect
25:08
SPEAKER_00: you
25:09
SPEAKER_00: from
25:09
SPEAKER_00: him.
25:10
SPEAKER_00: And
25:10
SPEAKER_00: I
25:11
SPEAKER_00: I
25:11
SPEAKER_00: remember
25:12
SPEAKER_00: um
25:13
SPEAKER_00: knowing
25:14
SPEAKER_00: deep
25:14
SPEAKER_00: inside
25:15
SPEAKER_00: that
25:15
SPEAKER_00: that
25:16
SPEAKER_00: that
25:16
SPEAKER_00: that
25:16
SPEAKER_00: was
25:16
SPEAKER_00: a
25:16
SPEAKER_00: message
25:17
SPEAKER_00: from
25:17
SPEAKER_00: the
25:17
SPEAKER_00: universe
25:18
SPEAKER_00: that
25:18
SPEAKER_00: I'd
25:18
SPEAKER_00: better,
25:19
SPEAKER_00: I
25:19
SPEAKER_00: better
25:20
SPEAKER_00: listen
25:20
SPEAKER_00: to.
25:21
SPEAKER_00: And
25:21
SPEAKER_00: so
25:22
SPEAKER_00: going
25:22
SPEAKER_00: through
25:23
SPEAKER_00: the
25:24
SPEAKER_00: program
25:25
SPEAKER_00: brought
25:25
SPEAKER_00: up
25:26
SPEAKER_00: a
25:26
SPEAKER_00: lot
25:26
SPEAKER_00: of
25:26
SPEAKER_00: stuff
25:27
SPEAKER_00: that
25:28
SPEAKER_00: I
25:28
SPEAKER_00: thought
25:28
SPEAKER_00: had
25:29
SPEAKER_00: been
25:29
SPEAKER_00: healed,
25:30
SPEAKER_00: I
25:30
SPEAKER_00: thought
25:30
SPEAKER_00: had
25:31
SPEAKER_00: been
25:32
SPEAKER_00: um,
25:32
SPEAKER_00: you
25:33
SPEAKER_00: know,
25:33
SPEAKER_00: worked
25:33
SPEAKER_00: through.
25:34
SPEAKER_00: And
25:35
SPEAKER_00: it
25:35
SPEAKER_00: luckily,
25:36
SPEAKER_00: I
25:36
SPEAKER_00: mean,
25:36
SPEAKER_00: I
25:36
SPEAKER_00: have
25:36
SPEAKER_00: a
25:37
SPEAKER_00: whole
25:37
SPEAKER_00: library
25:37
SPEAKER_00: of
25:37
SPEAKER_00: healing
25:38
SPEAKER_00: tools
25:38
SPEAKER_00: that
25:38
SPEAKER_00: I
25:38
SPEAKER_00: teach
25:39
SPEAKER_00: in
25:39
SPEAKER_00: Soma
25:39
SPEAKER_00: Tribe
25:40
SPEAKER_00: that
25:40
SPEAKER_00: are
25:40
SPEAKER_00: basically
25:41
SPEAKER_00: also
25:41
SPEAKER_00: designed
25:42
SPEAKER_00: to
25:42
SPEAKER_00: help
25:42
SPEAKER_00: you
25:42
SPEAKER_00: heal
25:43
SPEAKER_00: from
25:43
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
25:44
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
25:44
SPEAKER_00: I
25:44
SPEAKER_00: don't
25:45
SPEAKER_00: talk
25:45
SPEAKER_00: about
25:45
SPEAKER_00: straight
25:46
SPEAKER_00: narcissism
25:47
SPEAKER_00: as
25:47
SPEAKER_00: much
25:47
SPEAKER_00: in
25:47
SPEAKER_00: Soma
25:48
SPEAKER_00: Tribe
25:48
SPEAKER_00: because
25:49
SPEAKER_00: for
25:49
SPEAKER_00: me,
25:49
SPEAKER_00: that
25:50
SPEAKER_00: product,
25:50
SPEAKER_00: that
25:51
SPEAKER_00: program,
25:51
SPEAKER_00: that
25:51
SPEAKER_00: membership
25:52
SPEAKER_00: is
25:52
SPEAKER_00: there
25:52
SPEAKER_00: to
25:52
SPEAKER_00: help
25:53
SPEAKER_00: you
25:53
SPEAKER_00: create
25:53
SPEAKER_00: your
25:53
SPEAKER_00: new
25:54
SPEAKER_00: identity.
25:55
SPEAKER_00: Um,
25:56
SPEAKER_00: but
25:56
SPEAKER_00: I
25:56
SPEAKER_00: have
25:57
SPEAKER_00: been
25:57
SPEAKER_00: talking
25:57
SPEAKER_00: about
25:58
SPEAKER_00: it
25:58
SPEAKER_00: more
25:59
SPEAKER_00: as
25:59
SPEAKER_00: I'm
26:00
SPEAKER_00: realizing
26:00
SPEAKER_00: a
26:00
SPEAKER_00: lot
26:00
SPEAKER_00: of
26:01
SPEAKER_00: the
26:01
SPEAKER_00: people
26:01
SPEAKER_00: that
26:01
SPEAKER_00: just
26:02
SPEAKER_00: come
26:02
SPEAKER_00: into
26:02
SPEAKER_00: my
26:03
SPEAKER_00: world
26:04
SPEAKER_00: are
26:04
SPEAKER_00: people
26:05
SPEAKER_00: recovering
26:06
SPEAKER_00: from
26:06
SPEAKER_00: some
26:06
SPEAKER_00: form
26:07
SPEAKER_00: of
26:07
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
26:08
SPEAKER_00: abuse
26:08
SPEAKER_00: in
26:08
SPEAKER_00: their
26:09
SPEAKER_00: life.
26:09
SPEAKER_00: And
26:10
SPEAKER_00: they
26:10
SPEAKER_00: don't
26:10
SPEAKER_00: want
26:11
SPEAKER_00: to
26:11
SPEAKER_00: go
26:11
SPEAKER_00: to
26:11
SPEAKER_00: therapy
26:12
SPEAKER_00: and
26:12
SPEAKER_00: talk
26:12
SPEAKER_00: about
26:12
SPEAKER_00: it
26:13
SPEAKER_00: for
26:13
SPEAKER_00: the
26:13
SPEAKER_00: next
26:13
SPEAKER_00: 20
26:14
SPEAKER_00: years.
26:14
SPEAKER_00: They
26:15
SPEAKER_00: just
26:15
SPEAKER_00: want
26:15
SPEAKER_00: fast
26:15
SPEAKER_00: solutions.
26:16
SPEAKER_00: And
26:16
SPEAKER_00: I'm
26:17
SPEAKER_00: I'm
26:17
SPEAKER_00: a
26:17
SPEAKER_00: seven
26:18
SPEAKER_00: on
26:18
SPEAKER_00: the
26:18
SPEAKER_00: Enneagram.
26:19
SPEAKER_00: I
26:19
SPEAKER_00: came
26:19
SPEAKER_00: up
26:19
SPEAKER_00: with
26:19
SPEAKER_00: the
26:19
SPEAKER_00: fastest
26:20
SPEAKER_00: solutions.
26:21
SPEAKER_00: So
26:21
SPEAKER_00: here
26:21
SPEAKER_00: I
26:22
SPEAKER_00: am.
26:22
SPEAKER_00: And
26:22
SPEAKER_00: so
26:22
SPEAKER_00: it,
26:23
SPEAKER_00: but
26:23
SPEAKER_00: as
26:23
SPEAKER_00: I'm
26:23
SPEAKER_00: like
26:24
SPEAKER_00: going
26:24
SPEAKER_00: through
26:26
SPEAKER_00: the
26:26
SPEAKER_00: recovery
26:27
SPEAKER_00: certification
26:28
SPEAKER_00: program,
26:29
SPEAKER_00: I'm
26:29
SPEAKER_00: remembering
26:29
SPEAKER_00: a
26:30
SPEAKER_00: lot
26:30
SPEAKER_00: of
26:30
SPEAKER_00: the
26:30
SPEAKER_00: things
26:30
SPEAKER_00: that
26:30
SPEAKER_00: I
26:31
SPEAKER_00: went
26:31
SPEAKER_00: through
26:32
SPEAKER_00: that
26:32
SPEAKER_00: I
26:32
SPEAKER_00: had
26:33
SPEAKER_00: dissociated
26:33
SPEAKER_00: from,
26:34
SPEAKER_00: that
26:34
SPEAKER_00: I
26:34
SPEAKER_00: had
26:34
SPEAKER_00: forgotten
26:35
SPEAKER_00: about,
26:35
SPEAKER_00: um,
26:36
SPEAKER_00: that
26:36
SPEAKER_00: I
26:36
SPEAKER_00: just
26:37
SPEAKER_00: wasn't
26:37
SPEAKER_00: paying
26:38
SPEAKER_00: attention
26:38
SPEAKER_00: to
26:38
SPEAKER_00: anymore
26:39
SPEAKER_00: because
26:39
SPEAKER_00: I
26:39
SPEAKER_00: was
26:39
SPEAKER_00: moving
26:40
SPEAKER_00: forward.
26:41
SPEAKER_00: But
26:41
SPEAKER_00: my
26:41
SPEAKER_00: body
26:42
SPEAKER_00: last
26:42
SPEAKER_00: night
26:43
SPEAKER_00: started
26:44
SPEAKER_00: remembering
26:44
SPEAKER_00: and
26:45
SPEAKER_00: it
26:45
SPEAKER_00: started
26:45
SPEAKER_00: doing
26:46
SPEAKER_00: very
26:46
SPEAKER_00: similar
26:47
SPEAKER_00: things
26:47
SPEAKER_00: that
26:47
SPEAKER_00: it
26:48
SPEAKER_00: that
26:48
SPEAKER_00: it
26:48
SPEAKER_00: used
26:48
SPEAKER_00: to
26:49
SPEAKER_00: do.
26:49
SPEAKER_00: And
26:50
SPEAKER_00: I
26:50
SPEAKER_00: was
26:50
SPEAKER_00: immediately
26:51
SPEAKER_00: wanting
26:52
SPEAKER_00: to
26:52
SPEAKER_00: stuff
26:52
SPEAKER_00: my
26:52
SPEAKER_00: face
26:53
SPEAKER_00: with
26:53
SPEAKER_00: chocolate,
26:53
SPEAKER_00: and
26:54
SPEAKER_00: I
26:54
SPEAKER_00: was
26:54
SPEAKER_00: immediately
26:55
SPEAKER_00: felt
26:56
SPEAKER_00: like
26:56
SPEAKER_00: I
26:57
SPEAKER_00: was
26:57
SPEAKER_00: standing
26:58
SPEAKER_00: in
26:58
SPEAKER_00: the
26:58
SPEAKER_00: middle
26:58
SPEAKER_00: of
26:59
SPEAKER_00: my
26:59
SPEAKER_00: mind
27:00
SPEAKER_00: screaming,
27:01
SPEAKER_00: and
27:01
SPEAKER_00: everything
27:02
SPEAKER_00: around
27:02
SPEAKER_00: me
27:02
SPEAKER_00: was
27:02
SPEAKER_00: shaking,
27:03
SPEAKER_00: but
27:03
SPEAKER_00: nobody
27:03
SPEAKER_00: could
27:04
SPEAKER_00: hear
27:04
SPEAKER_00: me.
27:04
SPEAKER_00: And
27:04
SPEAKER_00: I
27:04
SPEAKER_00: don't
27:04
SPEAKER_00: know
27:05
SPEAKER_00: if
27:05
SPEAKER_00: you
27:05
SPEAKER_00: know
27:05
SPEAKER_00: what
27:05
SPEAKER_00: that
27:05
SPEAKER_00: feels
27:06
SPEAKER_00: like,
27:07
SPEAKER_00: but
27:08
SPEAKER_00: I
27:08
SPEAKER_00: I
27:08
SPEAKER_00: explain
27:09
SPEAKER_00: it
27:09
SPEAKER_00: like
27:09
SPEAKER_00: this
27:10
SPEAKER_00: when
27:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm
27:10
SPEAKER_00: working
27:10
SPEAKER_00: with
27:10
SPEAKER_00: people
27:10
SPEAKER_00: who've
27:11
SPEAKER_00: had
27:11
SPEAKER_00: a
27:11
SPEAKER_00: stroke
27:12
SPEAKER_00: or
27:12
SPEAKER_00: who
27:12
SPEAKER_00: have
27:13
SPEAKER_00: had
27:13
SPEAKER_00: a
27:13
SPEAKER_00: big
27:13
SPEAKER_00: trauma,
27:14
SPEAKER_00: where
27:14
SPEAKER_00: it's
27:15
SPEAKER_00: like
27:15
SPEAKER_00: the
27:15
SPEAKER_00: real
27:16
SPEAKER_00: you
27:16
SPEAKER_00: is
27:16
SPEAKER_00: inside
27:17
SPEAKER_00: of
27:17
SPEAKER_00: you
27:18
SPEAKER_00: and
27:18
SPEAKER_00: everything
27:18
SPEAKER_00: is
27:19
SPEAKER_00: moving
27:19
SPEAKER_00: fast
27:20
SPEAKER_00: around
27:20
SPEAKER_00: you
27:20
SPEAKER_00: and
27:21
SPEAKER_00: it's
27:21
SPEAKER_00: screaming,
27:22
SPEAKER_00: but
27:22
SPEAKER_00: like
27:23
SPEAKER_00: nobody
27:23
SPEAKER_00: can
27:23
SPEAKER_00: hear
27:24
SPEAKER_00: it.
27:24
SPEAKER_00: It's
27:24
SPEAKER_00: almost
27:24
SPEAKER_00: like
27:24
SPEAKER_00: someone
27:25
SPEAKER_00: put
27:25
SPEAKER_00: the
27:25
SPEAKER_00: mute
27:26
SPEAKER_00: button
27:26
SPEAKER_00: on.
27:27
SPEAKER_00: And
27:27
SPEAKER_00: it's
27:28
SPEAKER_00: an
27:28
SPEAKER_00: awful
27:28
SPEAKER_00: feeling
27:29
SPEAKER_00: to
27:29
SPEAKER_00: feel
27:30
SPEAKER_00: that
27:30
SPEAKER_00: way.
27:31
SPEAKER_00: Um,
27:32
SPEAKER_00: but
27:32
SPEAKER_00: when
27:32
SPEAKER_00: we
27:32
SPEAKER_00: look
27:33
SPEAKER_00: at
27:33
SPEAKER_00: like,
27:33
SPEAKER_00: let's
27:33
SPEAKER_00: just
27:33
SPEAKER_00: talk
27:34
SPEAKER_00: about
27:34
SPEAKER_00: some
27:34
SPEAKER_00: specific
27:34
SPEAKER_00: types
27:35
SPEAKER_00: of
27:35
SPEAKER_00: tension
27:36
SPEAKER_00: in
27:36
SPEAKER_00: the
27:36
SPEAKER_00: body.
27:37
SPEAKER_00: Um,
27:37
SPEAKER_00: like
27:37
SPEAKER_00: I
27:38
SPEAKER_00: said
27:38
SPEAKER_00: before,
27:38
SPEAKER_00: the
27:38
SPEAKER_00: shoulders
27:39
SPEAKER_00: often
27:39
SPEAKER_00: say
27:39
SPEAKER_00: I'm
27:40
SPEAKER_00: carrying
27:40
SPEAKER_00: too
27:40
SPEAKER_00: heavy
27:41
SPEAKER_00: a
27:41
SPEAKER_00: burden.
27:41
SPEAKER_00: Um,
27:42
SPEAKER_00: the
27:42
SPEAKER_00: pain
27:42
SPEAKER_00: in
27:42
SPEAKER_00: the
27:42
SPEAKER_00: jaw
27:43
SPEAKER_00: says
27:43
SPEAKER_00: there
27:43
SPEAKER_00: are
27:43
SPEAKER_00: things
27:44
SPEAKER_00: I
27:44
SPEAKER_00: can't
27:44
SPEAKER_00: say,
27:45
SPEAKER_00: screams
27:45
SPEAKER_00: I
27:45
SPEAKER_00: had
27:46
SPEAKER_00: to
27:46
SPEAKER_00: hold
27:46
SPEAKER_00: back.
27:47
SPEAKER_00: My
27:47
SPEAKER_00: truth
27:48
SPEAKER_00: is
27:48
SPEAKER_00: not
27:48
SPEAKER_00: gonna
27:48
SPEAKER_00: ever
27:49
SPEAKER_00: be
27:49
SPEAKER_00: heard.
27:49
SPEAKER_00: So
27:49
SPEAKER_00: I'm
27:50
SPEAKER_00: gonna
27:50
SPEAKER_00: choke
27:50
SPEAKER_00: it
27:50
SPEAKER_00: back
27:51
SPEAKER_00: and
27:51
SPEAKER_00: make
27:51
SPEAKER_00: sure
27:52
SPEAKER_00: that
27:52
SPEAKER_00: however
27:53
SPEAKER_00: whatever
27:53
SPEAKER_00: I
27:54
SPEAKER_00: say
27:54
SPEAKER_00: is
27:54
SPEAKER_00: going
27:55
SPEAKER_00: to
27:55
SPEAKER_00: be
27:55
SPEAKER_00: formulated
27:56
SPEAKER_00: in
27:56
SPEAKER_00: a
27:56
SPEAKER_00: way
27:56
SPEAKER_00: that
27:57
SPEAKER_00: prevents
27:57
SPEAKER_00: some
27:58
SPEAKER_00: kind
27:58
SPEAKER_00: of
27:58
SPEAKER_00: like
27:59
SPEAKER_00: meanness
27:59
SPEAKER_00: from
28:00
SPEAKER_00: the
28:00
SPEAKER_00: other
28:00
SPEAKER_00: person.
28:01
SPEAKER_00: Um,
28:01
SPEAKER_00: the
28:01
SPEAKER_00: pain
28:02
SPEAKER_00: in
28:02
SPEAKER_00: the
28:02
SPEAKER_00: lower
28:02
SPEAKER_00: back
28:03
SPEAKER_00: basically
28:04
SPEAKER_00: says
28:04
SPEAKER_00: I
28:04
SPEAKER_00: do
28:04
SPEAKER_00: not
28:04
SPEAKER_00: feel
28:05
SPEAKER_00: supported
28:05
SPEAKER_00: and
28:05
SPEAKER_00: I
28:05
SPEAKER_00: have
28:06
SPEAKER_00: to
28:06
SPEAKER_00: carry
28:06
SPEAKER_00: everything
28:07
SPEAKER_00: alone.
28:08
SPEAKER_00: Some
28:08
SPEAKER_00: survivors
28:09
SPEAKER_00: also
28:10
SPEAKER_00: develop
28:10
SPEAKER_00: complex
28:11
SPEAKER_00: pain
28:11
SPEAKER_00: syndromes,
28:12
SPEAKER_00: like
28:12
SPEAKER_00: I
28:12
SPEAKER_00: mentioned
28:12
SPEAKER_00: before,
28:12
SPEAKER_00: like
28:13
SPEAKER_00: fibromyalgia,
28:14
SPEAKER_00: uh,
28:14
SPEAKER_00: which
28:15
SPEAKER_00: is
28:15
SPEAKER_00: like
28:15
SPEAKER_00: this
28:16
SPEAKER_00: diffuse
28:16
SPEAKER_00: pain
28:16
SPEAKER_00: throughout
28:17
SPEAKER_00: the
28:17
SPEAKER_00: body,
28:18
SPEAKER_00: extreme
28:18
SPEAKER_00: fatigue,
28:19
SPEAKER_00: sleep
28:19
SPEAKER_00: disturbances.
28:20
SPEAKER_00: Fibromyalgia
28:21
SPEAKER_00: is
28:21
SPEAKER_00: legitimate.
28:22
SPEAKER_00: So
28:22
SPEAKER_00: when
28:23
SPEAKER_00: I
28:23
SPEAKER_00: talk
28:23
SPEAKER_00: about
28:24
SPEAKER_00: these
28:24
SPEAKER_00: things,
28:25
SPEAKER_00: I'm
28:25
SPEAKER_00: not
28:25
SPEAKER_00: saying
28:26
SPEAKER_00: that
28:26
SPEAKER_00: this
28:26
SPEAKER_00: is
28:27
SPEAKER_00: the
28:27
SPEAKER_00: answer
28:27
SPEAKER_00: to
28:28
SPEAKER_00: all
28:28
SPEAKER_00: of
28:28
SPEAKER_00: it,
28:29
SPEAKER_00: because
28:29
SPEAKER_00: I
28:29
SPEAKER_00: think
28:30
SPEAKER_00: a
28:30
SPEAKER_00: very
28:30
SPEAKER_00: holistic
28:31
SPEAKER_00: approach
28:32
SPEAKER_00: is
28:32
SPEAKER_00: needed.
28:32
SPEAKER_00: But
28:33
SPEAKER_00: if
28:33
SPEAKER_00: you're
28:33
SPEAKER_00: getting
28:34
SPEAKER_00: treatment
28:34
SPEAKER_00: for
28:34
SPEAKER_00: fibro
28:35
SPEAKER_00: and
28:36
SPEAKER_00: you're
28:36
SPEAKER_00: getting
28:36
SPEAKER_00: treatment
28:37
SPEAKER_00: for
28:37
SPEAKER_00: low
28:37
SPEAKER_00: back
28:38
SPEAKER_00: and
28:38
SPEAKER_00: shoulder
28:38
SPEAKER_00: pain
28:39
SPEAKER_00: and
28:39
SPEAKER_00: things
28:39
SPEAKER_00: like
28:39
SPEAKER_00: that,
28:39
SPEAKER_00: and
28:40
SPEAKER_00: it's
28:40
SPEAKER_00: not
28:40
SPEAKER_00: resolving
28:41
SPEAKER_00: itself,
28:42
SPEAKER_00: I'm
28:42
SPEAKER_00: gonna
28:42
SPEAKER_00: invite
28:43
SPEAKER_00: you
28:43
SPEAKER_00: to
28:43
SPEAKER_00: take
28:44
SPEAKER_00: a
28:44
SPEAKER_00: look
28:45
SPEAKER_00: deeper.
28:46
SPEAKER_00: Because
28:46
SPEAKER_00: I
28:47
SPEAKER_00: was
28:47
SPEAKER_00: terrified
28:47
SPEAKER_00: at
28:48
SPEAKER_00: looking
28:48
SPEAKER_00: at
28:48
SPEAKER_00: my
28:49
SPEAKER_00: trauma
28:49
SPEAKER_00: because
28:49
SPEAKER_00: I
28:49
SPEAKER_00: didn't
28:50
SPEAKER_00: want
28:50
SPEAKER_00: to
28:50
SPEAKER_00: open
28:50
SPEAKER_00: Pandora's
28:51
SPEAKER_00: box.
28:52
SPEAKER_00: And
28:52
SPEAKER_00: I
28:52
SPEAKER_00: thought
28:53
SPEAKER_00: that
28:53
SPEAKER_00: it
28:53
SPEAKER_00: meant
28:53
SPEAKER_00: me
28:54
SPEAKER_00: going
28:54
SPEAKER_00: and
28:54
SPEAKER_00: sitting
28:54
SPEAKER_00: and
28:54
SPEAKER_00: talking
28:55
SPEAKER_00: to
28:55
SPEAKER_00: a
28:55
SPEAKER_00: therapist,
28:56
SPEAKER_00: unpacking
28:56
SPEAKER_00: all
28:56
SPEAKER_00: my
28:56
SPEAKER_00: mommy
28:57
SPEAKER_00: and
28:57
SPEAKER_00: daddy
28:57
SPEAKER_00: issues.
28:58
SPEAKER_00: And
28:58
SPEAKER_00: I
28:58
SPEAKER_00: didn't
28:59
SPEAKER_00: want
28:59
SPEAKER_00: to
28:59
SPEAKER_00: do
28:59
SPEAKER_00: that.
29:00
SPEAKER_00: Um,
29:00
SPEAKER_00: I
29:00
SPEAKER_00: I
29:01
SPEAKER_00: guess
29:01
SPEAKER_00: most
29:01
SPEAKER_00: people
29:02
SPEAKER_00: probably
29:02
SPEAKER_00: don't
29:02
SPEAKER_00: want
29:02
SPEAKER_00: to
29:02
SPEAKER_00: do
29:03
SPEAKER_00: that,
29:03
SPEAKER_00: but
29:03
SPEAKER_00: I
29:03
SPEAKER_00: really
29:03
SPEAKER_00: didn't
29:04
SPEAKER_00: want
29:04
SPEAKER_00: to
29:04
SPEAKER_00: do
29:04
SPEAKER_00: that.
29:04
SPEAKER_00: I
29:04
SPEAKER_00: was
29:04
SPEAKER_00: like,
29:05
SPEAKER_00: I
29:05
SPEAKER_00: ain't
29:05
SPEAKER_00: got
29:05
SPEAKER_00: no
29:05
SPEAKER_00: time
29:05
SPEAKER_00: for
29:06
SPEAKER_00: that.
29:06
SPEAKER_00: I'm
29:06
SPEAKER_00: a
29:06
SPEAKER_00: single
29:07
SPEAKER_00: mom,
29:07
SPEAKER_00: I'm
29:07
SPEAKER_00: running
29:08
SPEAKER_00: a
29:08
SPEAKER_00: business,
29:08
SPEAKER_00: and
29:09
SPEAKER_00: my
29:09
SPEAKER_00: soul
29:09
SPEAKER_00: has
29:09
SPEAKER_00: a
29:09
SPEAKER_00: mission.
29:10
SPEAKER_00: And
29:10
SPEAKER_00: who
29:11
SPEAKER_00: has
29:11
SPEAKER_00: time
29:11
SPEAKER_00: for
29:11
SPEAKER_00: that?
29:11
SPEAKER_00: I
29:12
SPEAKER_00: don't.
29:12
SPEAKER_00: And
29:12
SPEAKER_00: I
29:13
SPEAKER_00: went
29:13
SPEAKER_00: down
29:13
SPEAKER_00: the
29:13
SPEAKER_00: path
29:13
SPEAKER_00: of
29:14
SPEAKER_00: working
29:14
SPEAKER_00: with
29:14
SPEAKER_00: coaching
29:15
SPEAKER_00: and
29:15
SPEAKER_00: superconscious
29:16
SPEAKER_00: work.
29:17
SPEAKER_00: And
29:18
SPEAKER_00: that
29:19
SPEAKER_00: was
29:19
SPEAKER_00: the
29:20
SPEAKER_00: path
29:20
SPEAKER_00: that
29:20
SPEAKER_00: worked
29:21
SPEAKER_00: fastest
29:22
SPEAKER_00: for
29:22
SPEAKER_00: me.
29:22
SPEAKER_00: And
29:22
SPEAKER_00: I'm
29:23
SPEAKER_00: not
29:23
SPEAKER_00: dismissing
29:23
SPEAKER_00: any
29:24
SPEAKER_00: of
29:24
SPEAKER_00: the
29:24
SPEAKER_00: other
29:24
SPEAKER_00: tools.
29:24
SPEAKER_00: I
29:25
SPEAKER_00: think
29:25
SPEAKER_00: any
29:26
SPEAKER_00: kind
29:26
SPEAKER_00: of
29:26
SPEAKER_00: help
29:27
SPEAKER_00: is
29:27
SPEAKER_00: going
29:27
SPEAKER_00: to
29:28
SPEAKER_00: be
29:28
SPEAKER_00: the
29:28
SPEAKER_00: step
29:29
SPEAKER_00: in
29:29
SPEAKER_00: the
29:29
SPEAKER_00: right
29:29
SPEAKER_00: direction.
29:30
SPEAKER_00: But
29:30
SPEAKER_00: if
29:31
SPEAKER_00: I'm
29:31
SPEAKER_00: inviting
29:31
SPEAKER_00: you,
29:31
SPEAKER_00: if
29:32
SPEAKER_00: you
29:32
SPEAKER_00: have
29:32
SPEAKER_00: chronic
29:33
SPEAKER_00: pain,
29:34
SPEAKER_00: if
29:34
SPEAKER_00: you
29:34
SPEAKER_00: have
29:34
SPEAKER_00: unresolved
29:35
SPEAKER_00: health
29:35
SPEAKER_00: issues,
29:36
SPEAKER_00: please
29:38
SPEAKER_00: empower
29:39
SPEAKER_00: yourself
29:40
SPEAKER_00: with
29:40
SPEAKER_00: the
29:40
SPEAKER_00: knowledge
29:41
SPEAKER_00: that
29:41
SPEAKER_00: it
29:42
SPEAKER_00: could
29:42
SPEAKER_00: be
29:43
SPEAKER_00: something
29:44
SPEAKER_00: more.
29:45
SPEAKER_00: And
29:45
SPEAKER_00: I
29:45
SPEAKER_00: just
29:45
SPEAKER_00: think
29:46
SPEAKER_00: we're
29:46
SPEAKER_00: not
29:46
SPEAKER_00: talking
29:47
SPEAKER_00: about
29:47
SPEAKER_00: this
29:47
SPEAKER_00: enough.
29:48
SPEAKER_00: I'm
29:48
SPEAKER_00: not
29:48
SPEAKER_00: sure
29:48
SPEAKER_00: that
29:49
SPEAKER_00: people,
29:49
SPEAKER_00: I
29:49
SPEAKER_00: mean,
29:49
SPEAKER_00: in
29:50
SPEAKER_00: my
29:50
SPEAKER_00: world
29:50
SPEAKER_00: we
29:50
SPEAKER_00: do,
29:51
SPEAKER_00: but
29:51
SPEAKER_00: then
29:51
SPEAKER_00: I
29:51
SPEAKER_00: realize
29:52
SPEAKER_00: I
29:52
SPEAKER_00: live
29:52
SPEAKER_00: in
29:52
SPEAKER_00: a
29:52
SPEAKER_00: very
29:53
SPEAKER_00: small
29:53
SPEAKER_00: world,
29:53
SPEAKER_00: right?
29:54
SPEAKER_00: Like
29:54
SPEAKER_00: I
29:54
SPEAKER_00: live
29:54
SPEAKER_00: in
29:54
SPEAKER_00: a
29:55
SPEAKER_00: world
29:55
SPEAKER_00: of
29:55
SPEAKER_00: people
29:56
SPEAKER_00: who
29:56
SPEAKER_00: inquire
29:57
SPEAKER_00: about
29:58
SPEAKER_00: their
29:58
SPEAKER_00: health
29:58
SPEAKER_00: and
29:59
SPEAKER_00: who,
29:59
SPEAKER_00: you
30:00
SPEAKER_00: know,
30:00
SPEAKER_00: take
30:00
SPEAKER_00: responsibility
30:01
SPEAKER_00: for
30:01
SPEAKER_00: it
30:02
SPEAKER_00: and
30:02
SPEAKER_00: you
30:02
SPEAKER_00: know,
30:03
SPEAKER_00: they
30:03
SPEAKER_00: find
30:03
SPEAKER_00: alternative
30:04
SPEAKER_00: health
30:04
SPEAKER_00: practitioners.
30:05
SPEAKER_00: So
30:05
SPEAKER_00: that's
30:05
SPEAKER_00: the
30:06
SPEAKER_00: world
30:06
SPEAKER_00: I
30:06
SPEAKER_00: live
30:06
SPEAKER_00: in.
30:06
SPEAKER_00: I
30:06
SPEAKER_00: forget
30:07
SPEAKER_00: every
30:07
SPEAKER_00: well,
30:07
SPEAKER_00: not
30:08
SPEAKER_00: everyone
30:08
SPEAKER_00: lives
30:08
SPEAKER_00: in
30:08
SPEAKER_00: that
30:08
SPEAKER_00: little
30:09
SPEAKER_00: world.
30:09
SPEAKER_00: So
30:10
SPEAKER_00: um
30:11
SPEAKER_00: I
30:12
SPEAKER_00: also
30:12
SPEAKER_00: want
30:12
SPEAKER_00: to
30:12
SPEAKER_00: talk
30:13
SPEAKER_00: about
30:13
SPEAKER_00: um
30:14
SPEAKER_00: why
30:14
SPEAKER_00: digestive
30:15
SPEAKER_00: digestive
30:17
SPEAKER_00: disorders
30:18
SPEAKER_00: are
30:19
SPEAKER_00: also
30:21
SPEAKER_00: really
30:21
SPEAKER_00: high
30:23
SPEAKER_00: for
30:23
SPEAKER_00: people
30:23
SPEAKER_00: who
30:24
SPEAKER_00: are
30:24
SPEAKER_00: recovering
30:24
SPEAKER_00: from
30:24
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
30:25
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
30:26
SPEAKER_00: The
30:27
SPEAKER_00: distressed
30:28
SPEAKER_00: second
30:29
SPEAKER_00: brain,
30:29
SPEAKER_00: basically.
30:30
SPEAKER_00: The
30:30
SPEAKER_00: digestive
30:31
SPEAKER_00: system,
30:31
SPEAKER_00: often
30:32
SPEAKER_00: referred
30:32
SPEAKER_00: to
30:32
SPEAKER_00: as
30:32
SPEAKER_00: the
30:33
SPEAKER_00: second
30:33
SPEAKER_00: brain,
30:33
SPEAKER_00: due
30:34
SPEAKER_00: to
30:34
SPEAKER_00: its
30:34
SPEAKER_00: dense
30:34
SPEAKER_00: neural
30:35
SPEAKER_00: network
30:35
SPEAKER_00: and
30:35
SPEAKER_00: its
30:36
SPEAKER_00: intimate
30:36
SPEAKER_00: connection
30:37
SPEAKER_00: with
30:37
SPEAKER_00: the
30:37
SPEAKER_00: main
30:38
SPEAKER_00: brain,
30:38
SPEAKER_00: is
30:38
SPEAKER_00: particularly
30:39
SPEAKER_00: vulnerable
30:40
SPEAKER_00: to
30:41
SPEAKER_00: the
30:41
SPEAKER_00: effects
30:41
SPEAKER_00: of
30:41
SPEAKER_00: chronic
30:42
SPEAKER_00: stress
30:42
SPEAKER_00: and
30:42
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
30:43
SPEAKER_00: Digestive
30:44
SPEAKER_00: disorders
30:45
SPEAKER_00: are
30:45
SPEAKER_00: extremely
30:46
SPEAKER_00: common
30:46
SPEAKER_00: among
30:46
SPEAKER_00: survivors
30:47
SPEAKER_00: of
30:47
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
30:48
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
30:49
SPEAKER_00: Irritable
30:50
SPEAKER_00: bowel
30:50
SPEAKER_00: syndrome
30:51
SPEAKER_00: is
30:51
SPEAKER_00: one
30:52
SPEAKER_00: of
30:52
SPEAKER_00: the
30:52
SPEAKER_00: most
30:53
SPEAKER_00: common
30:53
SPEAKER_00: manifestations
30:55
SPEAKER_00: of
30:55
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
30:56
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
30:57
SPEAKER_00: Basically,
30:57
SPEAKER_00: it
30:58
SPEAKER_00: alternates
30:58
SPEAKER_00: between
30:59
SPEAKER_00: constipation
30:59
SPEAKER_00: and
30:59
SPEAKER_00: diarrhea,
31:00
SPEAKER_00: abdominal
31:01
SPEAKER_00: cramps,
31:01
SPEAKER_00: bloating,
31:02
SPEAKER_00: nausea.
31:03
SPEAKER_00: These
31:03
SPEAKER_00: symptoms
31:04
SPEAKER_00: can
31:04
SPEAKER_00: be
31:04
SPEAKER_00: constant
31:05
SPEAKER_00: or
31:05
SPEAKER_00: triggered
31:06
SPEAKER_00: in
31:06
SPEAKER_00: stressful
31:07
SPEAKER_00: situations.
31:08
SPEAKER_00: For
31:08
SPEAKER_00: many
31:08
SPEAKER_00: survivors,
31:09
SPEAKER_00: the
31:09
SPEAKER_00: digestive
31:10
SPEAKER_00: system
31:10
SPEAKER_00: becomes
31:11
SPEAKER_00: an
31:11
SPEAKER_00: emotional
31:12
SPEAKER_00: barometer,
31:13
SPEAKER_00: reacting
31:13
SPEAKER_00: immediately
31:15
SPEAKER_00: to
31:15
SPEAKER_00: any
31:15
SPEAKER_00: anxiety,
31:16
SPEAKER_00: trigger,
31:17
SPEAKER_00: or
31:17
SPEAKER_00: trauma-related
31:18
SPEAKER_00: thought.
31:20
SPEAKER_00: I
31:21
SPEAKER_00: can't
31:21
SPEAKER_00: even
31:21
SPEAKER_00: tell
31:21
SPEAKER_00: you
31:22
SPEAKER_00: how
31:22
SPEAKER_00: bad
31:22
SPEAKER_00: my
31:22
SPEAKER_00: ulcerative
31:23
SPEAKER_00: partitis
31:24
SPEAKER_00: was.
31:24
SPEAKER_00: It
31:24
SPEAKER_00: was
31:24
SPEAKER_00: the
31:24
SPEAKER_00: most
31:25
SPEAKER_00: uncomfortable
31:26
SPEAKER_00: thing
31:26
SPEAKER_00: of
31:26
SPEAKER_00: all
31:27
SPEAKER_00: of
31:27
SPEAKER_00: the
31:27
SPEAKER_00: health
31:27
SPEAKER_00: conditions
31:28
SPEAKER_00: I've
31:28
SPEAKER_00: had.
31:28
SPEAKER_00: That
31:28
SPEAKER_00: was
31:29
SPEAKER_00: one
31:29
SPEAKER_00: of
31:29
SPEAKER_00: the
31:29
SPEAKER_00: most
31:29
SPEAKER_00: humiliating.
31:30
SPEAKER_00: I
31:31
SPEAKER_00: remember
31:31
SPEAKER_00: even
31:31
SPEAKER_00: just
31:31
SPEAKER_00: trying
31:32
SPEAKER_00: to
31:32
SPEAKER_00: go
31:32
SPEAKER_00: on
31:32
SPEAKER_00: a
31:32
SPEAKER_00: hike
31:32
SPEAKER_00: with
31:33
SPEAKER_00: my
31:33
SPEAKER_00: daughter
31:34
SPEAKER_00: at
31:34
SPEAKER_00: Silver
31:35
SPEAKER_00: Falls,
31:35
SPEAKER_00: and
31:36
SPEAKER_00: I
31:36
SPEAKER_00: was
31:36
SPEAKER_00: like
31:37
SPEAKER_00: 280
31:37
SPEAKER_00: pounds
31:38
SPEAKER_00: at
31:38
SPEAKER_00: the
31:38
SPEAKER_00: time,
31:39
SPEAKER_00: and
31:39
SPEAKER_00: I
31:40
SPEAKER_00: had
31:40
SPEAKER_00: back
31:40
SPEAKER_00: pain
31:41
SPEAKER_00: and
31:41
SPEAKER_00: foot
31:41
SPEAKER_00: pain
31:42
SPEAKER_00: and
31:42
SPEAKER_00: neck
31:42
SPEAKER_00: pain,
31:42
SPEAKER_00: and
31:43
SPEAKER_00: it
31:43
SPEAKER_00: I
31:43
SPEAKER_00: was
31:43
SPEAKER_00: constantly
31:44
SPEAKER_00: in
31:44
SPEAKER_00: pain.
31:45
SPEAKER_00: And
31:45
SPEAKER_00: it
31:46
SPEAKER_00: made
31:46
SPEAKER_00: it
31:46
SPEAKER_00: worse
31:47
SPEAKER_00: because
31:48
SPEAKER_00: every
31:48
SPEAKER_00: time
31:48
SPEAKER_00: I
31:48
SPEAKER_00: tried
31:49
SPEAKER_00: to
31:49
SPEAKER_00: go
31:49
SPEAKER_00: for
31:49
SPEAKER_00: a
31:50
SPEAKER_00: walk,
31:51
SPEAKER_00: I'd
31:51
SPEAKER_00: like
31:52
SPEAKER_00: have
31:52
SPEAKER_00: diarrhea.
31:54
SPEAKER_00: Yeah,
31:54
SPEAKER_00: and
31:55
SPEAKER_00: it
31:55
SPEAKER_00: didn't
31:55
SPEAKER_00: always
31:56
SPEAKER_00: make
31:56
SPEAKER_00: it
31:56
SPEAKER_00: to
31:56
SPEAKER_00: the
31:56
SPEAKER_00: toilet.
31:57
SPEAKER_00: So
31:57
SPEAKER_00: um,
31:58
SPEAKER_00: it
31:58
SPEAKER_00: was
31:59
SPEAKER_00: awful
32:00
SPEAKER_00: because
32:00
SPEAKER_00: it
32:00
SPEAKER_00: was
32:01
SPEAKER_00: humiliating,
32:02
SPEAKER_00: and
32:03
SPEAKER_00: it
32:03
SPEAKER_00: also
32:04
SPEAKER_00: put
32:05
SPEAKER_00: a
32:05
SPEAKER_00: huge
32:05
SPEAKER_00: wedge
32:06
SPEAKER_00: between
32:07
SPEAKER_00: you
32:08
SPEAKER_00: know
32:08
SPEAKER_00: how
32:09
SPEAKER_00: I
32:09
SPEAKER_00: wanted
32:09
SPEAKER_00: to
32:10
SPEAKER_00: live
32:10
SPEAKER_00: my
32:10
SPEAKER_00: life.
32:11
SPEAKER_00: This
32:12
SPEAKER_00: connection
32:12
SPEAKER_00: between
32:13
SPEAKER_00: brain
32:13
SPEAKER_00: and
32:13
SPEAKER_00: gut
32:14
SPEAKER_00: is
32:14
SPEAKER_00: not
32:14
SPEAKER_00: metaphorical
32:15
SPEAKER_00: at
32:15
SPEAKER_00: all.
32:16
SPEAKER_00: The
32:16
SPEAKER_00: gut-brain
32:17
SPEAKER_00: access
32:17
SPEAKER_00: is
32:17
SPEAKER_00: a
32:18
SPEAKER_00: real
32:18
SPEAKER_00: bidirectional
32:19
SPEAKER_00: communication
32:19
SPEAKER_00: pathway.
32:20
SPEAKER_00: Stress
32:21
SPEAKER_00: and
32:21
SPEAKER_00: trauma
32:21
SPEAKER_00: affect
32:22
SPEAKER_00: intestinal
32:23
SPEAKER_00: motility,
32:24
SPEAKER_00: the
32:24
SPEAKER_00: secretion
32:25
SPEAKER_00: of
32:25
SPEAKER_00: digestive
32:26
SPEAKER_00: enzymes,
32:27
SPEAKER_00: the
32:27
SPEAKER_00: composition
32:28
SPEAKER_00: of
32:28
SPEAKER_00: the
32:28
SPEAKER_00: gut
32:29
SPEAKER_00: microbiome,
32:30
SPEAKER_00: and
32:30
SPEAKER_00: even
32:30
SPEAKER_00: the
32:30
SPEAKER_00: permeability
32:31
SPEAKER_00: of
32:31
SPEAKER_00: the
32:32
SPEAKER_00: intestinal
32:32
SPEAKER_00: wall.
32:33
SPEAKER_00: These
32:34
SPEAKER_00: physiological
32:34
SPEAKER_00: changes
32:35
SPEAKER_00: create
32:36
SPEAKER_00: real
32:36
SPEAKER_00: and
32:36
SPEAKER_00: persistent
32:37
SPEAKER_00: digestive
32:38
SPEAKER_00: symptoms.
32:39
SPEAKER_00: Many
32:40
SPEAKER_00: survivors
32:41
SPEAKER_00: develop
32:42
SPEAKER_00: problematic
32:43
SPEAKER_00: relationships
32:44
SPEAKER_00: with
32:44
SPEAKER_00: food.
32:45
SPEAKER_00: Some
32:46
SPEAKER_00: completely
32:46
SPEAKER_00: lose
32:47
SPEAKER_00: their
32:47
SPEAKER_00: appetite
32:48
SPEAKER_00: with
32:48
SPEAKER_00: food
32:49
SPEAKER_00: becoming
32:49
SPEAKER_00: tasteless
32:50
SPEAKER_00: or
32:50
SPEAKER_00: even
32:50
SPEAKER_00: repulsive.
32:51
SPEAKER_00: This
32:51
SPEAKER_00: happened
32:52
SPEAKER_00: to
32:52
SPEAKER_00: me
32:52
SPEAKER_00: after
32:53
SPEAKER_00: I
32:54
SPEAKER_00: um
32:54
SPEAKER_00: was
32:55
SPEAKER_00: dumped
32:55
SPEAKER_00: by
32:56
SPEAKER_00: the
32:56
SPEAKER_00: narcissist
32:56
SPEAKER_00: in
32:57
SPEAKER_00: 2019.
32:58
SPEAKER_00: I
32:58
SPEAKER_00: literally
32:59
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
32:59
SPEAKER_00: eat.
32:59
SPEAKER_00: I
33:00
SPEAKER_00: I
33:00
SPEAKER_00: went
33:01
SPEAKER_00: the
33:01
SPEAKER_00: complete
33:02
SPEAKER_00: opposite
33:02
SPEAKER_00: where
33:03
SPEAKER_00: food
33:03
SPEAKER_00: was
33:03
SPEAKER_00: repulsive.
33:04
SPEAKER_00: I
33:04
SPEAKER_00: would
33:04
SPEAKER_00: look
33:05
SPEAKER_00: at
33:05
SPEAKER_00: food
33:05
SPEAKER_00: and
33:05
SPEAKER_00: I
33:05
SPEAKER_00: felt
33:06
SPEAKER_00: like
33:06
SPEAKER_00: it
33:06
SPEAKER_00: would
33:06
SPEAKER_00: kill
33:06
SPEAKER_00: me
33:06
SPEAKER_00: if
33:07
SPEAKER_00: I
33:07
SPEAKER_00: ate
33:07
SPEAKER_00: it.
33:08
SPEAKER_00: Now,
33:08
SPEAKER_00: I
33:08
SPEAKER_00: have
33:09
SPEAKER_00: had
33:09
SPEAKER_00: emotional
33:10
SPEAKER_00: eating
33:10
SPEAKER_00: issues
33:11
SPEAKER_00: my
33:11
SPEAKER_00: entire
33:12
SPEAKER_00: life.
33:12
SPEAKER_00: This
33:13
SPEAKER_00: was
33:13
SPEAKER_00: not
33:13
SPEAKER_00: something
33:14
SPEAKER_00: that
33:14
SPEAKER_00: I
33:14
SPEAKER_00: was
33:14
SPEAKER_00: accustomed
33:15
SPEAKER_00: to.
33:16
SPEAKER_00: Uh,
33:16
SPEAKER_00: others
33:16
SPEAKER_00: develop
33:17
SPEAKER_00: compulsive
33:18
SPEAKER_00: eating
33:18
SPEAKER_00: behaviors.
33:18
SPEAKER_00: That's
33:19
SPEAKER_00: usually
33:19
SPEAKER_00: what
33:20
SPEAKER_00: I
33:20
SPEAKER_00: um
33:20
SPEAKER_00: leaned
33:21
SPEAKER_00: on
33:21
SPEAKER_00: when
33:21
SPEAKER_00: dealing
33:21
SPEAKER_00: with
33:21
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
33:22
SPEAKER_00: abuse,
33:23
SPEAKER_00: using
33:23
SPEAKER_00: food
33:23
SPEAKER_00: as
33:24
SPEAKER_00: a
33:24
SPEAKER_00: means
33:24
SPEAKER_00: of
33:24
SPEAKER_00: emotional
33:25
SPEAKER_00: regulation,
33:25
SPEAKER_00: comfort,
33:26
SPEAKER_00: or
33:26
SPEAKER_00: filling
33:27
SPEAKER_00: an
33:27
SPEAKER_00: internal
33:27
SPEAKER_00: void.
33:28
SPEAKER_00: These
33:28
SPEAKER_00: dysfunctional
33:29
SPEAKER_00: eating
33:29
SPEAKER_00: patterns
33:29
SPEAKER_00: can
33:30
SPEAKER_00: lead
33:30
SPEAKER_00: to
33:30
SPEAKER_00: clinical
33:30
SPEAKER_00: eating
33:31
SPEAKER_00: disorders
33:31
SPEAKER_00: requiring
33:32
SPEAKER_00: specialized
33:32
SPEAKER_00: treatment.
33:33
SPEAKER_00: Now,
33:33
SPEAKER_00: I
33:34
SPEAKER_00: have
33:34
SPEAKER_00: a
33:34
SPEAKER_00: lot
33:34
SPEAKER_00: of
33:34
SPEAKER_00: processes
33:35
SPEAKER_00: in
33:35
SPEAKER_00: the
33:35
SPEAKER_00: tribe
33:36
SPEAKER_00: that
33:37
SPEAKER_00: address
33:38
SPEAKER_00: emotional
33:38
SPEAKER_00: eating
33:39
SPEAKER_00: at
33:39
SPEAKER_00: the
33:39
SPEAKER_00: root
33:40
SPEAKER_00: and
33:41
SPEAKER_00: help
33:41
SPEAKER_00: people
33:41
SPEAKER_00: overcome
33:42
SPEAKER_00: that
33:43
SPEAKER_00: because
33:43
SPEAKER_00: I
33:43
SPEAKER_00: think
33:44
SPEAKER_00: that
33:44
SPEAKER_00: it's
33:45
SPEAKER_00: part
33:45
SPEAKER_00: of
33:45
SPEAKER_00: living
33:46
SPEAKER_00: in
33:46
SPEAKER_00: an
33:47
SPEAKER_00: alignment
33:48
SPEAKER_00: with
33:48
SPEAKER_00: your
33:48
SPEAKER_00: higher
33:48
SPEAKER_00: self,
33:49
SPEAKER_00: is
33:49
SPEAKER_00: eating
33:49
SPEAKER_00: healthier.
33:50
SPEAKER_00: And
33:51
SPEAKER_00: it
33:51
SPEAKER_00: is
33:51
SPEAKER_00: part
33:52
SPEAKER_00: of
33:52
SPEAKER_00: learning
33:53
SPEAKER_00: to,
33:53
SPEAKER_00: you
33:54
SPEAKER_00: know,
33:54
SPEAKER_00: recognize,
33:55
SPEAKER_00: especially
33:55
SPEAKER_00: for
33:55
SPEAKER_00: empaths,
33:56
SPEAKER_00: when
33:56
SPEAKER_00: you're
33:56
SPEAKER_00: taking
33:57
SPEAKER_00: on
33:57
SPEAKER_00: other
33:57
SPEAKER_00: people's
33:58
SPEAKER_00: emotions
33:59
SPEAKER_00: as
33:59
SPEAKER_00: your
33:59
SPEAKER_00: own.
34:00
SPEAKER_00: I
34:00
SPEAKER_00: feel
34:00
SPEAKER_00: like
34:00
SPEAKER_00: we
34:00
SPEAKER_00: we
34:01
SPEAKER_00: carry
34:01
SPEAKER_00: it
34:01
SPEAKER_00: around
34:02
SPEAKER_00: with
34:02
SPEAKER_00: us,
34:02
SPEAKER_00: and
34:02
SPEAKER_00: that
34:02
SPEAKER_00: can
34:03
SPEAKER_00: look
34:03
SPEAKER_00: like
34:03
SPEAKER_00: an
34:03
SPEAKER_00: extra
34:03
SPEAKER_00: 20
34:04
SPEAKER_00: pounds.
34:05
SPEAKER_00: Um,
34:06
SPEAKER_00: we
34:06
SPEAKER_00: also
34:06
SPEAKER_00: need
34:07
SPEAKER_00: to
34:07
SPEAKER_00: look
34:07
SPEAKER_00: at
34:08
SPEAKER_00: chronic
34:08
SPEAKER_00: fatigue.
34:09
SPEAKER_00: I
34:09
SPEAKER_00: remember
34:10
SPEAKER_00: when
34:10
SPEAKER_00: I
34:10
SPEAKER_00: had
34:10
SPEAKER_00: chronic
34:10
SPEAKER_00: fatigue
34:11
SPEAKER_00: syndrome,
34:12
SPEAKER_00: it
34:12
SPEAKER_00: feels
34:12
SPEAKER_00: like
34:12
SPEAKER_00: forever
34:12
SPEAKER_00: now,
34:13
SPEAKER_00: but
34:13
SPEAKER_00: this
34:13
SPEAKER_00: is
34:14
SPEAKER_00: exhaustion
34:14
SPEAKER_00: at
34:14
SPEAKER_00: like
34:15
SPEAKER_00: the
34:15
SPEAKER_00: cellular
34:16
SPEAKER_00: level.
34:16
SPEAKER_00: We've
34:17
SPEAKER_00: already
34:17
SPEAKER_00: like
34:17
SPEAKER_00: mentioned
34:18
SPEAKER_00: fatigue
34:18
SPEAKER_00: in
34:19
SPEAKER_00: the
34:19
SPEAKER_00: in
34:19
SPEAKER_00: the
34:19
SPEAKER_00: context
34:19
SPEAKER_00: of
34:20
SPEAKER_00: like
34:20
SPEAKER_00: depression,
34:21
SPEAKER_00: but
34:21
SPEAKER_00: it
34:21
SPEAKER_00: deserves
34:22
SPEAKER_00: a
34:22
SPEAKER_00: deeper
34:22
SPEAKER_00: exploration
34:23
SPEAKER_00: in
34:23
SPEAKER_00: its
34:23
SPEAKER_00: somatic
34:24
SPEAKER_00: dimension.
34:25
SPEAKER_00: The
34:25
SPEAKER_00: chronic
34:26
SPEAKER_00: fatigue
34:26
SPEAKER_00: experienced
34:27
SPEAKER_00: by
34:27
SPEAKER_00: survivors
34:28
SPEAKER_00: of
34:28
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
34:29
SPEAKER_00: abuse
34:29
SPEAKER_00: is
34:29
SPEAKER_00: not
34:30
SPEAKER_00: simply
34:30
SPEAKER_00: a
34:30
SPEAKER_00: desire
34:31
SPEAKER_00: to
34:31
SPEAKER_00: sleep
34:32
SPEAKER_00: or
34:32
SPEAKER_00: a
34:32
SPEAKER_00: lack
34:32
SPEAKER_00: of
34:33
SPEAKER_00: motivation,
34:34
SPEAKER_00: it
34:34
SPEAKER_00: is
34:34
SPEAKER_00: a
34:34
SPEAKER_00: deep
34:35
SPEAKER_00: exhaustion
34:36
SPEAKER_00: at
34:36
SPEAKER_00: the
34:37
SPEAKER_00: cellular
34:37
SPEAKER_00: level,
34:38
SPEAKER_00: a
34:38
SPEAKER_00: depletion
34:39
SPEAKER_00: of
34:39
SPEAKER_00: the
34:39
SPEAKER_00: body's
34:39
SPEAKER_00: energy
34:40
SPEAKER_00: resources
34:41
SPEAKER_00: that
34:41
SPEAKER_00: can
34:41
SPEAKER_00: be
34:41
SPEAKER_00: biologically
34:42
SPEAKER_00: measured.
34:43
SPEAKER_00: Chronic
34:44
SPEAKER_00: stress
34:44
SPEAKER_00: affects
34:45
SPEAKER_00: the
34:45
SPEAKER_00: mitochondria
34:46
SPEAKER_00: or
34:46
SPEAKER_00: the
34:46
SPEAKER_00: powerhouses
34:47
SPEAKER_00: of
34:48
SPEAKER_00: cells.
34:48
SPEAKER_00: Under
34:49
SPEAKER_00: prolonged
34:49
SPEAKER_00: stress,
34:50
SPEAKER_00: mitochondrial
34:51
SPEAKER_00: function
34:52
SPEAKER_00: deteriorates,
34:52
SPEAKER_00: reducing
34:53
SPEAKER_00: the
34:53
SPEAKER_00: cell's
34:54
SPEAKER_00: ability
34:54
SPEAKER_00: to
34:54
SPEAKER_00: produce
34:55
SPEAKER_00: energy.
34:55
SPEAKER_00: Simultaneously,
34:56
SPEAKER_00: the
34:57
SPEAKER_00: adrenal
34:57
SPEAKER_00: glands,
34:58
SPEAKER_00: which
34:58
SPEAKER_00: produce
34:58
SPEAKER_00: cortisol
34:59
SPEAKER_00: and
34:59
SPEAKER_00: other
34:59
SPEAKER_00: stress
35:00
SPEAKER_00: hormones,
35:01
SPEAKER_00: can
35:01
SPEAKER_00: become
35:01
SPEAKER_00: exhausted
35:02
SPEAKER_00: after
35:03
SPEAKER_00: months
35:03
SPEAKER_00: or
35:03
SPEAKER_00: years
35:04
SPEAKER_00: of
35:04
SPEAKER_00: overactivity,
35:06
SPEAKER_00: leading
35:06
SPEAKER_00: to
35:06
SPEAKER_00: what
35:07
SPEAKER_00: is
35:07
SPEAKER_00: sometimes
35:07
SPEAKER_00: called
35:08
SPEAKER_00: adrenal
35:09
SPEAKER_00: fatigue.
35:15
SPEAKER_00: And
35:15
SPEAKER_00: there's
35:15
SPEAKER_00: like
35:15
SPEAKER_00: a
35:16
SPEAKER_00: specific
35:16
SPEAKER_00: muscle
35:17
SPEAKER_00: sequence
35:17
SPEAKER_00: that
35:18
SPEAKER_00: when
35:18
SPEAKER_00: I'm
35:18
SPEAKER_00: working
35:18
SPEAKER_00: on
35:18
SPEAKER_00: someone,
35:19
SPEAKER_00: I
35:19
SPEAKER_00: can
35:19
SPEAKER_00: always
35:19
SPEAKER_00: tell
35:19
SPEAKER_00: when
35:19
SPEAKER_00: their
35:20
SPEAKER_00: adrenal
35:20
SPEAKER_00: glands
35:20
SPEAKER_00: are
35:20
SPEAKER_00: being
35:21
SPEAKER_00: taxed.
35:22
SPEAKER_00: And
35:23
SPEAKER_00: I'll
35:23
SPEAKER_00: just
35:23
SPEAKER_00: say
35:24
SPEAKER_00: ashwagandha
35:25
SPEAKER_00: is
35:25
SPEAKER_00: a
35:25
SPEAKER_00: really
35:26
SPEAKER_00: helpful
35:26
SPEAKER_00: herb
35:27
SPEAKER_00: for
35:27
SPEAKER_00: this
35:28
SPEAKER_00: and
35:28
SPEAKER_00: restoring
35:29
SPEAKER_00: healthy
35:29
SPEAKER_00: adrenal
35:30
SPEAKER_00: function.
35:31
SPEAKER_00: Um,
35:32
SPEAKER_00: if
35:32
SPEAKER_00: you
35:33
SPEAKER_00: know,
35:33
SPEAKER_00: if
35:33
SPEAKER_00: you've
35:34
SPEAKER_00: been
35:34
SPEAKER_00: told
35:34
SPEAKER_00: you
35:34
SPEAKER_00: have
35:35
SPEAKER_00: adrenal
35:35
SPEAKER_00: fatigue,
35:36
SPEAKER_00: you
35:36
SPEAKER_00: definitely
35:37
SPEAKER_00: want
35:37
SPEAKER_00: to
35:38
SPEAKER_00: look
35:38
SPEAKER_00: at
35:39
SPEAKER_00: like
35:39
SPEAKER_00: long-term
35:40
SPEAKER_00: stress
35:40
SPEAKER_00: on
35:41
SPEAKER_00: the
35:41
SPEAKER_00: body
35:42
SPEAKER_00: and
35:42
SPEAKER_00: the
35:42
SPEAKER_00: real
35:43
SPEAKER_00: cost
35:43
SPEAKER_00: of
35:44
SPEAKER_00: it
35:44
SPEAKER_00: because
35:44
SPEAKER_00: it's
35:45
SPEAKER_00: it's
35:45
SPEAKER_00: real
35:46
SPEAKER_00: and
35:46
SPEAKER_00: it's
35:47
SPEAKER_00: it's
35:48
SPEAKER_00: hard
35:49
SPEAKER_00: to
35:50
SPEAKER_00: understand
35:50
SPEAKER_00: when
35:51
SPEAKER_00: you're
35:51
SPEAKER_00: in
35:51
SPEAKER_00: it
35:52
SPEAKER_00: because
35:53
SPEAKER_00: it's
35:53
SPEAKER_00: just
35:54
SPEAKER_00: feels
35:54
SPEAKER_00: like
35:54
SPEAKER_00: uh
35:54
SPEAKER_00: you're
35:55
SPEAKER_00: too
35:55
SPEAKER_00: tired
35:55
SPEAKER_00: to
35:55
SPEAKER_00: even
35:56
SPEAKER_00: figure
35:56
SPEAKER_00: it
35:56
SPEAKER_00: out.
35:57
SPEAKER_00: Uh,
35:57
SPEAKER_00: you
35:57
SPEAKER_00: wake
35:58
SPEAKER_00: up
35:58
SPEAKER_00: exhausted,
35:59
SPEAKER_00: you
36:00
SPEAKER_00: um
36:00
SPEAKER_00: feel
36:01
SPEAKER_00: like
36:01
SPEAKER_00: maybe
36:01
SPEAKER_00: taking
36:02
SPEAKER_00: a
36:02
SPEAKER_00: shower
36:02
SPEAKER_00: might
36:02
SPEAKER_00: be
36:03
SPEAKER_00: too
36:03
SPEAKER_00: too
36:03
SPEAKER_00: much
36:03
SPEAKER_00: of
36:03
SPEAKER_00: an
36:04
SPEAKER_00: effort.
36:04
SPEAKER_00: Climbing
36:05
SPEAKER_00: stairs
36:05
SPEAKER_00: leaves
36:05
SPEAKER_00: you
36:06
SPEAKER_00: breathless,
36:06
SPEAKER_00: your
36:06
SPEAKER_00: body
36:07
SPEAKER_00: feels
36:07
SPEAKER_00: heavy
36:07
SPEAKER_00: as
36:08
SPEAKER_00: if
36:08
SPEAKER_00: you're
36:08
SPEAKER_00: walking
36:08
SPEAKER_00: through
36:08
SPEAKER_00: molasses,
36:10
SPEAKER_00: and
36:10
SPEAKER_00: it's
36:11
SPEAKER_00: just
36:11
SPEAKER_00: like
36:11
SPEAKER_00: you
36:11
SPEAKER_00: didn't
36:12
SPEAKER_00: get
36:12
SPEAKER_00: enough
36:12
SPEAKER_00: sleep,
36:12
SPEAKER_00: but
36:13
SPEAKER_00: it
36:13
SPEAKER_00: doesn't
36:13
SPEAKER_00: matter
36:13
SPEAKER_00: how
36:14
SPEAKER_00: much
36:14
SPEAKER_00: sleep
36:14
SPEAKER_00: you
36:14
SPEAKER_00: get,
36:14
SPEAKER_00: you're
36:15
SPEAKER_00: just
36:15
SPEAKER_00: not
36:15
SPEAKER_00: getting
36:15
SPEAKER_00: enough
36:16
SPEAKER_00: sleep
36:17
SPEAKER_00: ever.
36:17
SPEAKER_00: Um,
36:18
SPEAKER_00: your
36:19
SPEAKER_00: muscles
36:19
SPEAKER_00: feel
36:20
SPEAKER_00: tired.
36:20
SPEAKER_00: Every
36:21
SPEAKER_00: cell
36:22
SPEAKER_00: of
36:22
SPEAKER_00: your
36:22
SPEAKER_00: body
36:23
SPEAKER_00: feels
36:24
SPEAKER_00: exhausted.
36:24
SPEAKER_00: It
36:24
SPEAKER_00: feels
36:25
SPEAKER_00: like
36:25
SPEAKER_00: your
36:25
SPEAKER_00: bones
36:26
SPEAKER_00: just
36:26
SPEAKER_00: can't
36:26
SPEAKER_00: hold
36:27
SPEAKER_00: you
36:27
SPEAKER_00: up.
36:28
SPEAKER_00: This
36:28
SPEAKER_00: fatigue
36:29
SPEAKER_00: has
36:29
SPEAKER_00: cascading
36:30
SPEAKER_00: consequences.
36:31
SPEAKER_00: It
36:31
SPEAKER_00: makes
36:31
SPEAKER_00: physical
36:32
SPEAKER_00: exercise
36:32
SPEAKER_00: difficult,
36:33
SPEAKER_00: which
36:33
SPEAKER_00: could
36:33
SPEAKER_00: otherwise
36:34
SPEAKER_00: aid
36:34
SPEAKER_00: in
36:34
SPEAKER_00: recovery.
36:35
SPEAKER_00: It
36:35
SPEAKER_00: affects
36:35
SPEAKER_00: the
36:35
SPEAKER_00: ability
36:36
SPEAKER_00: to
36:36
SPEAKER_00: work,
36:36
SPEAKER_00: socialize,
36:37
SPEAKER_00: and
36:37
SPEAKER_00: take
36:37
SPEAKER_00: care
36:37
SPEAKER_00: of
36:37
SPEAKER_00: oneself.
36:38
SPEAKER_00: It
36:38
SPEAKER_00: creates
36:39
SPEAKER_00: a
36:39
SPEAKER_00: vicious
36:39
SPEAKER_00: cycle.
36:40
SPEAKER_00: Fatigue
36:41
SPEAKER_00: leads
36:41
SPEAKER_00: to
36:41
SPEAKER_00: inactivity,
36:42
SPEAKER_00: which
36:42
SPEAKER_00: leads
36:42
SPEAKER_00: to
36:43
SPEAKER_00: more
36:43
SPEAKER_00: fatigue,
36:43
SPEAKER_00: which
36:44
SPEAKER_00: leads
36:44
SPEAKER_00: to
36:44
SPEAKER_00: more
36:44
SPEAKER_00: inactivity.
36:46
SPEAKER_00: The
36:46
SPEAKER_00: chronic
36:47
SPEAKER_00: fatigue
36:48
SPEAKER_00: is
36:48
SPEAKER_00: often
36:48
SPEAKER_00: misunderstood
36:49
SPEAKER_00: by
36:49
SPEAKER_00: other
36:49
SPEAKER_00: people.
36:50
SPEAKER_00: Loved
36:50
SPEAKER_00: ones
36:50
SPEAKER_00: may
36:51
SPEAKER_00: perceive
36:51
SPEAKER_00: it
36:51
SPEAKER_00: as
36:51
SPEAKER_00: laziness
36:52
SPEAKER_00: or
36:52
SPEAKER_00: a
36:52
SPEAKER_00: lack
36:52
SPEAKER_00: of
36:53
SPEAKER_00: willpower.
36:54
SPEAKER_00: You
36:54
SPEAKER_00: might
36:55
SPEAKER_00: think
36:55
SPEAKER_00: that
36:55
SPEAKER_00: you
36:55
SPEAKER_00: have
36:56
SPEAKER_00: that
36:56
SPEAKER_00: you
36:56
SPEAKER_00: have
36:56
SPEAKER_00: a
36:56
SPEAKER_00: chronic
36:57
SPEAKER_00: case
36:57
SPEAKER_00: of
36:57
SPEAKER_00: laziness
36:58
SPEAKER_00: or
36:58
SPEAKER_00: lack
36:58
SPEAKER_00: of
36:59
SPEAKER_00: willpower,
36:59
SPEAKER_00: that
37:00
SPEAKER_00: you
37:00
SPEAKER_00: should
37:00
SPEAKER_00: just
37:00
SPEAKER_00: push
37:00
SPEAKER_00: yourself
37:01
SPEAKER_00: harder.
37:01
SPEAKER_00: Maybe
37:01
SPEAKER_00: you're
37:02
SPEAKER_00: just
37:02
SPEAKER_00: getting
37:02
SPEAKER_00: old.
37:03
SPEAKER_00: Maybe
37:03
SPEAKER_00: if
37:03
SPEAKER_00: you
37:04
SPEAKER_00: exercised
37:04
SPEAKER_00: more
37:05
SPEAKER_00: or
37:05
SPEAKER_00: you
37:05
SPEAKER_00: had
37:05
SPEAKER_00: you'd
37:06
SPEAKER_00: you'd
37:06
SPEAKER_00: have
37:06
SPEAKER_00: more
37:06
SPEAKER_00: energy.
37:08
SPEAKER_00: Or
37:08
SPEAKER_00: maybe,
37:08
SPEAKER_00: you
37:09
SPEAKER_00: know,
37:09
SPEAKER_00: you
37:09
SPEAKER_00: just
37:09
SPEAKER_00: can't
37:10
SPEAKER_00: figure
37:10
SPEAKER_00: out
37:10
SPEAKER_00: what's
37:10
SPEAKER_00: wrong.
37:11
SPEAKER_00: Your
37:11
SPEAKER_00: body
37:12
SPEAKER_00: just
37:12
SPEAKER_00: won't
37:13
SPEAKER_00: move.
37:13
SPEAKER_00: Well,
37:14
SPEAKER_00: what
37:14
SPEAKER_00: happens
37:15
SPEAKER_00: is,
37:16
SPEAKER_00: well-intentioned
37:18
SPEAKER_00: as
37:18
SPEAKER_00: they
37:18
SPEAKER_00: may
37:18
SPEAKER_00: be,
37:19
SPEAKER_00: um,
37:20
SPEAKER_00: these
37:20
SPEAKER_00: ignorant
37:20
SPEAKER_00: comments
37:21
SPEAKER_00: add
37:21
SPEAKER_00: shame
37:21
SPEAKER_00: and
37:22
SPEAKER_00: isolation
37:22
SPEAKER_00: to
37:22
SPEAKER_00: the
37:23
SPEAKER_00: already
37:23
SPEAKER_00: overwhelming
37:24
SPEAKER_00: exhaustion.
37:25
SPEAKER_00: And
37:25
SPEAKER_00: I
37:25
SPEAKER_00: don't
37:26
SPEAKER_00: know
37:26
SPEAKER_00: if
37:26
SPEAKER_00: you
37:26
SPEAKER_00: know
37:27
SPEAKER_00: this,
37:27
SPEAKER_00: but
37:27
SPEAKER_00: shame
37:28
SPEAKER_00: acts
37:28
SPEAKER_00: like
37:29
SPEAKER_00: a
37:29
SPEAKER_00: bigger
37:30
SPEAKER_00: chain
37:30
SPEAKER_00: to
37:31
SPEAKER_00: the
37:31
SPEAKER_00: prison
37:31
SPEAKER_00: of
37:31
SPEAKER_00: narcissism
37:33
SPEAKER_00: because
37:33
SPEAKER_00: shame
37:34
SPEAKER_00: is
37:34
SPEAKER_00: basically
37:35
SPEAKER_00: what
37:35
SPEAKER_00: they
37:36
SPEAKER_00: keep
37:36
SPEAKER_00: you
37:36
SPEAKER_00: in
37:37
SPEAKER_00: to
37:37
SPEAKER_00: control
37:38
SPEAKER_00: you
37:38
SPEAKER_00: so
37:38
SPEAKER_00: that
37:39
SPEAKER_00: you
37:39
SPEAKER_00: never
37:40
SPEAKER_00: leave.
37:41
SPEAKER_00: Because
37:41
SPEAKER_00: shame
37:41
SPEAKER_00: is
37:42
SPEAKER_00: heavy.
37:42
SPEAKER_00: I
37:43
SPEAKER_00: don't
37:43
SPEAKER_00: care
37:43
SPEAKER_00: how
37:43
SPEAKER_00: much
37:43
SPEAKER_00: you
37:44
SPEAKER_00: weigh,
37:44
SPEAKER_00: shame
37:44
SPEAKER_00: is
37:45
SPEAKER_00: heavy.
37:47
SPEAKER_00: A
37:47
SPEAKER_00: lot
37:48
SPEAKER_00: of
37:48
SPEAKER_00: people
37:48
SPEAKER_00: will
37:49
SPEAKER_00: also
37:49
SPEAKER_00: experience
37:50
SPEAKER_00: sleep
37:50
SPEAKER_00: disorders,
37:51
SPEAKER_00: and
37:52
SPEAKER_00: sleep
37:52
SPEAKER_00: is
37:52
SPEAKER_00: an
37:53
SPEAKER_00: essential
37:53
SPEAKER_00: restorative
37:54
SPEAKER_00: function,
37:55
SPEAKER_00: and
37:55
SPEAKER_00: it
37:56
SPEAKER_00: is
37:56
SPEAKER_00: profoundly
37:57
SPEAKER_00: disrupted
37:57
SPEAKER_00: in
37:58
SPEAKER_00: most
37:58
SPEAKER_00: survivors
37:58
SPEAKER_00: of
37:59
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
38:00
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
38:00
SPEAKER_00: Sleep
38:01
SPEAKER_00: disorders
38:01
SPEAKER_00: take
38:01
SPEAKER_00: multiple
38:02
SPEAKER_00: forms
38:02
SPEAKER_00: and
38:02
SPEAKER_00: have
38:03
SPEAKER_00: multiple
38:03
SPEAKER_00: causes,
38:04
SPEAKER_00: all
38:04
SPEAKER_00: related
38:05
SPEAKER_00: to
38:05
SPEAKER_00: the
38:05
SPEAKER_00: dysregulation
38:06
SPEAKER_00: of
38:06
SPEAKER_00: the
38:06
SPEAKER_00: nervous
38:07
SPEAKER_00: system
38:07
SPEAKER_00: and
38:07
SPEAKER_00: the
38:07
SPEAKER_00: persistence
38:08
SPEAKER_00: of
38:08
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
38:09
SPEAKER_00: Insomnia
38:10
SPEAKER_00: is
38:10
SPEAKER_00: common,
38:11
SPEAKER_00: laying
38:12
SPEAKER_00: awake
38:12
SPEAKER_00: at
38:12
SPEAKER_00: night.
38:12
SPEAKER_00: I
38:13
SPEAKER_00: remember
38:13
SPEAKER_00: after
38:14
SPEAKER_00: my
38:14
SPEAKER_00: um
38:14
SPEAKER_00: big,
38:15
SPEAKER_00: big
38:15
SPEAKER_00: heartbreak
38:16
SPEAKER_00: in
38:16
SPEAKER_00: 2019,
38:18
SPEAKER_00: I
38:18
SPEAKER_00: would
38:18
SPEAKER_00: lay
38:19
SPEAKER_00: there
38:20
SPEAKER_00: ruminating
38:21
SPEAKER_00: all
38:22
SPEAKER_00: night
38:23
SPEAKER_00: long.
38:24
SPEAKER_00: And
38:24
SPEAKER_00: I
38:24
SPEAKER_00: could
38:25
SPEAKER_00: not
38:25
SPEAKER_00: get
38:25
SPEAKER_00: my
38:26
SPEAKER_00: mind
38:26
SPEAKER_00: to
38:26
SPEAKER_00: stop
38:27
SPEAKER_00: racing.
38:28
SPEAKER_00: It
38:28
SPEAKER_00: only
38:29
SPEAKER_00: made
38:29
SPEAKER_00: it
38:30
SPEAKER_00: worse.
38:31
SPEAKER_00: And
38:31
SPEAKER_00: that's
38:31
SPEAKER_00: why
38:32
SPEAKER_00: one
38:32
SPEAKER_00: of
38:32
SPEAKER_00: the
38:32
SPEAKER_00: first
38:33
SPEAKER_00: tools
38:33
SPEAKER_00: that
38:33
SPEAKER_00: I
38:33
SPEAKER_00: teach
38:34
SPEAKER_00: is
38:34
SPEAKER_00: to
38:34
SPEAKER_00: how
38:34
SPEAKER_00: to
38:35
SPEAKER_00: break
38:35
SPEAKER_00: the
38:35
SPEAKER_00: rumination
38:36
SPEAKER_00: patterns
38:37
SPEAKER_00: because
38:38
SPEAKER_00: it
38:38
SPEAKER_00: is
38:39
SPEAKER_00: crazy
38:39
SPEAKER_00: making,
38:40
SPEAKER_00: and
38:40
SPEAKER_00: you're
38:41
SPEAKER_00: only
38:41
SPEAKER_00: creating
38:42
SPEAKER_00: deeper
38:42
SPEAKER_00: grooves
38:43
SPEAKER_00: in
38:43
SPEAKER_00: your
38:43
SPEAKER_00: brain
38:44
SPEAKER_00: that
38:45
SPEAKER_00: make
38:45
SPEAKER_00: this
38:46
SPEAKER_00: person
38:46
SPEAKER_00: feel
38:47
SPEAKER_00: like
38:47
SPEAKER_00: the
38:47
SPEAKER_00: only
38:48
SPEAKER_00: solution
38:49
SPEAKER_00: is
38:49
SPEAKER_00: them.
38:50
SPEAKER_00: It's
38:50
SPEAKER_00: the
38:50
SPEAKER_00: same
38:51
SPEAKER_00: as
38:51
SPEAKER_00: quitting
38:52
SPEAKER_00: cigarettes,
38:52
SPEAKER_00: it's
38:53
SPEAKER_00: the
38:53
SPEAKER_00: same
38:53
SPEAKER_00: as
38:54
SPEAKER_00: coming
38:54
SPEAKER_00: off
38:54
SPEAKER_00: of
38:54
SPEAKER_00: sugar,
38:55
SPEAKER_00: you
38:55
SPEAKER_00: know,
38:56
SPEAKER_00: quitting
38:56
SPEAKER_00: drinking
38:56
SPEAKER_00: if
38:57
SPEAKER_00: you
38:57
SPEAKER_00: have
38:57
SPEAKER_00: a
38:57
SPEAKER_00: drinking
38:58
SPEAKER_00: problem.
38:58
SPEAKER_00: Um,
38:59
SPEAKER_00: it's
39:00
SPEAKER_00: the
39:00
SPEAKER_00: same
39:00
SPEAKER_00: as
39:00
SPEAKER_00: getting
39:01
SPEAKER_00: off
39:01
SPEAKER_00: of
39:01
SPEAKER_00: drugs
39:02
SPEAKER_00: because
39:02
SPEAKER_00: it
39:02
SPEAKER_00: creates
39:03
SPEAKER_00: a
39:03
SPEAKER_00: drug
39:03
SPEAKER_00: loop
39:04
SPEAKER_00: in
39:04
SPEAKER_00: your
39:04
SPEAKER_00: brain.
39:04
SPEAKER_00: You
39:05
SPEAKER_00: become
39:05
SPEAKER_00: literally
39:06
SPEAKER_00: addicted
39:08
SPEAKER_00: to
39:08
SPEAKER_00: the
39:08
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
39:09
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
39:11
SPEAKER_00: You
39:11
SPEAKER_00: might
39:12
SPEAKER_00: not
39:12
SPEAKER_00: know
39:12
SPEAKER_00: it,
39:13
SPEAKER_00: but
39:13
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
39:14
SPEAKER_00: abuse
39:15
SPEAKER_00: is
39:15
SPEAKER_00: highly
39:17
SPEAKER_00: addictive.
39:19
SPEAKER_00: I
39:19
SPEAKER_00: know
39:21
SPEAKER_00: that
39:22
SPEAKER_00: sounds
39:23
SPEAKER_00: a
39:23
SPEAKER_00: little
39:24
SPEAKER_00: out
39:24
SPEAKER_00: there,
39:24
SPEAKER_00: but
39:24
SPEAKER_00: it's
39:25
SPEAKER_00: true.
39:25
SPEAKER_00: And
39:26
SPEAKER_00: they've
39:26
SPEAKER_00: done
39:26
SPEAKER_00: research.
39:27
SPEAKER_00: Um,
39:28
SPEAKER_00: think
39:28
SPEAKER_00: of
39:28
SPEAKER_00: heroin,
39:29
SPEAKER_00: right?
39:30
SPEAKER_00: Like
39:31
SPEAKER_00: heroin
39:32
SPEAKER_00: makes
39:32
SPEAKER_00: you
39:32
SPEAKER_00: feel
39:33
SPEAKER_00: euphoric.
39:34
SPEAKER_00: I
39:34
SPEAKER_00: don't
39:34
SPEAKER_00: know,
39:34
SPEAKER_00: I've
39:34
SPEAKER_00: never
39:34
SPEAKER_00: done
39:34
SPEAKER_00: it,
39:35
SPEAKER_00: but
39:35
SPEAKER_00: I
39:35
SPEAKER_00: hear
39:35
SPEAKER_00: it
39:35
SPEAKER_00: makes
39:35
SPEAKER_00: you
39:36
SPEAKER_00: feel
39:36
SPEAKER_00: euphoric.
39:37
SPEAKER_00: Coming
39:37
SPEAKER_00: off
39:37
SPEAKER_00: of
39:38
SPEAKER_00: heroin
39:38
SPEAKER_00: makes
39:39
SPEAKER_00: you
39:39
SPEAKER_00: feel
39:39
SPEAKER_00: like
39:39
SPEAKER_00: you're
39:39
SPEAKER_00: gonna
39:40
SPEAKER_00: die.
39:41
SPEAKER_00: A
39:41
SPEAKER_00: narcissist,
39:42
SPEAKER_00: when
39:42
SPEAKER_00: they
39:42
SPEAKER_00: love
39:43
SPEAKER_00: bomb
39:43
SPEAKER_00: you,
39:44
SPEAKER_00: it
39:44
SPEAKER_00: makes
39:44
SPEAKER_00: you
39:44
SPEAKER_00: feel
39:45
SPEAKER_00: euphoric.
39:46
SPEAKER_00: When
39:47
SPEAKER_00: they
39:47
SPEAKER_00: start
39:48
SPEAKER_00: to
39:48
SPEAKER_00: pull
39:48
SPEAKER_00: away,
39:49
SPEAKER_00: it
39:49
SPEAKER_00: makes
39:49
SPEAKER_00: you
39:49
SPEAKER_00: feel
39:49
SPEAKER_00: like
39:50
SPEAKER_00: you're
39:50
SPEAKER_00: gonna
39:50
SPEAKER_00: die.
39:51
SPEAKER_00: It's
39:52
SPEAKER_00: the
39:52
SPEAKER_00: same
39:52
SPEAKER_00: loop.
39:53
SPEAKER_00: Different
39:54
SPEAKER_00: drug.
39:56
SPEAKER_00: Nighttime
39:57
SPEAKER_00: awakenings
39:58
SPEAKER_00: are
39:58
SPEAKER_00: also
39:58
SPEAKER_00: characteristic.
39:59
SPEAKER_00: Uh
40:00
SPEAKER_00: the
40:00
SPEAKER_00: survivors
40:01
SPEAKER_00: may
40:01
SPEAKER_00: fall
40:01
SPEAKER_00: asleep
40:01
SPEAKER_00: but
40:02
SPEAKER_00: wake
40:02
SPEAKER_00: up
40:02
SPEAKER_00: several
40:02
SPEAKER_00: times
40:02
SPEAKER_00: during
40:03
SPEAKER_00: the
40:03
SPEAKER_00: night,
40:03
SPEAKER_00: often
40:04
SPEAKER_00: suddenly
40:05
SPEAKER_00: with
40:05
SPEAKER_00: a
40:05
SPEAKER_00: racco,
40:07
SPEAKER_00: sweating,
40:08
SPEAKER_00: um,
40:08
SPEAKER_00: nightmares,
40:09
SPEAKER_00: uh,
40:10
SPEAKER_00: just
40:11
SPEAKER_00: really
40:11
SPEAKER_00: not
40:11
SPEAKER_00: feeling
40:12
SPEAKER_00: safe
40:12
SPEAKER_00: in
40:13
SPEAKER_00: bed.
40:13
SPEAKER_00: Uh,
40:14
SPEAKER_00: nightmares
40:15
SPEAKER_00: uh
40:15
SPEAKER_00: are
40:16
SPEAKER_00: really
40:16
SPEAKER_00: prevalent,
40:17
SPEAKER_00: and
40:18
SPEAKER_00: they
40:18
SPEAKER_00: are
40:18
SPEAKER_00: often
40:19
SPEAKER_00: the
40:19
SPEAKER_00: somatic
40:19
SPEAKER_00: manifestation
40:20
SPEAKER_00: of
40:20
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
40:21
SPEAKER_00: I
40:21
SPEAKER_00: used
40:21
SPEAKER_00: to
40:21
SPEAKER_00: have
40:21
SPEAKER_00: horrific
40:22
SPEAKER_00: nightmares
40:23
SPEAKER_00: all
40:23
SPEAKER_00: of
40:23
SPEAKER_00: the
40:23
SPEAKER_00: time,
40:24
SPEAKER_00: and
40:24
SPEAKER_00: I
40:24
SPEAKER_00: did
40:25
SPEAKER_00: not
40:25
SPEAKER_00: understand
40:25
SPEAKER_00: why.
40:26
SPEAKER_00: I
40:26
SPEAKER_00: very
40:26
SPEAKER_00: rarely
40:27
SPEAKER_00: get
40:27
SPEAKER_00: them
40:27
SPEAKER_00: anymore
40:27
SPEAKER_00: unless
40:28
SPEAKER_00: I'm
40:28
SPEAKER_00: doing
40:28
SPEAKER_00: lucid
40:29
SPEAKER_00: dreaming
40:29
SPEAKER_00: intentionally
40:30
SPEAKER_00: to
40:30
SPEAKER_00: shift
40:30
SPEAKER_00: trauma.
40:31
SPEAKER_00: Um,
40:32
SPEAKER_00: but
40:32
SPEAKER_00: they
40:32
SPEAKER_00: they
40:33
SPEAKER_00: are
40:33
SPEAKER_00: literally
40:33
SPEAKER_00: replays
40:34
SPEAKER_00: of
40:34
SPEAKER_00: trauma
40:34
SPEAKER_00: when
40:35
SPEAKER_00: you're
40:35
SPEAKER_00: sleep,
40:35
SPEAKER_00: when
40:36
SPEAKER_00: you're
40:36
SPEAKER_00: sleeping.
40:37
SPEAKER_00: And
40:37
SPEAKER_00: the
40:37
SPEAKER_00: brain
40:37
SPEAKER_00: is
40:37
SPEAKER_00: attempting
40:38
SPEAKER_00: to
40:38
SPEAKER_00: process
40:38
SPEAKER_00: and
40:38
SPEAKER_00: integrate
40:39
SPEAKER_00: traumatic
40:40
SPEAKER_00: experiences.
40:41
SPEAKER_00: And,
40:42
SPEAKER_00: you
40:42
SPEAKER_00: know,
40:43
SPEAKER_00: sometimes
40:44
SPEAKER_00: we
40:44
SPEAKER_00: just
40:44
SPEAKER_00: don't
40:45
SPEAKER_00: want
40:45
SPEAKER_00: to
40:45
SPEAKER_00: go
40:45
SPEAKER_00: to
40:45
SPEAKER_00: sleep
40:46
SPEAKER_00: because
40:46
SPEAKER_00: we
40:46
SPEAKER_00: don't
40:47
SPEAKER_00: want
40:47
SPEAKER_00: to
40:47
SPEAKER_00: experience
40:48
SPEAKER_00: terror
40:48
SPEAKER_00: in
40:48
SPEAKER_00: our
40:49
SPEAKER_00: sleep,
40:49
SPEAKER_00: especially
40:50
SPEAKER_00: when
40:50
SPEAKER_00: we've
40:50
SPEAKER_00: had
40:50
SPEAKER_00: to
40:50
SPEAKER_00: endure
40:51
SPEAKER_00: it
40:51
SPEAKER_00: in
40:51
SPEAKER_00: our
40:51
SPEAKER_00: daily
40:51
SPEAKER_00: life.
40:52
SPEAKER_00: And
40:52
SPEAKER_00: you
40:52
SPEAKER_00: might
40:53
SPEAKER_00: not
40:53
SPEAKER_00: equate
40:54
SPEAKER_00: your
40:54
SPEAKER_00: narcissist,
40:56
SPEAKER_00: whoever
40:56
SPEAKER_00: they
40:56
SPEAKER_00: are,
40:57
SPEAKER_00: um,
40:57
SPEAKER_00: or
40:57
SPEAKER_00: whatever
40:58
SPEAKER_00: system
40:58
SPEAKER_00: it
40:58
SPEAKER_00: is,
40:59
SPEAKER_00: because
40:59
SPEAKER_00: this
40:59
SPEAKER_00: can
40:59
SPEAKER_00: also
41:00
SPEAKER_00: come
41:00
SPEAKER_00: from
41:00
SPEAKER_00: religious
41:01
SPEAKER_00: organizations.
41:02
SPEAKER_00: Um,
41:03
SPEAKER_00: but
41:04
SPEAKER_00: it
41:04
SPEAKER_00: you
41:05
SPEAKER_00: probably
41:05
SPEAKER_00: don't
41:06
SPEAKER_00: want
41:06
SPEAKER_00: to
41:06
SPEAKER_00: keep
41:06
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
41:07
SPEAKER_00: it
41:07
SPEAKER_00: at
41:08
SPEAKER_00: night.
41:08
SPEAKER_00: It's
41:09
SPEAKER_00: like,
41:09
SPEAKER_00: you
41:09
SPEAKER_00: know,
41:09
SPEAKER_00: at
41:10
SPEAKER_00: least
41:10
SPEAKER_00: during
41:10
SPEAKER_00: the
41:10
SPEAKER_00: day
41:10
SPEAKER_00: you
41:11
SPEAKER_00: know
41:11
SPEAKER_00: what
41:11
SPEAKER_00: to
41:11
SPEAKER_00: expect,
41:11
SPEAKER_00: but
41:12
SPEAKER_00: in
41:12
SPEAKER_00: your
41:12
SPEAKER_00: nightmares,
41:12
SPEAKER_00: you
41:12
SPEAKER_00: never
41:13
SPEAKER_00: know
41:13
SPEAKER_00: what's
41:14
SPEAKER_00: gonna
41:14
SPEAKER_00: come
41:14
SPEAKER_00: through.
41:15
SPEAKER_00: It's
41:15
SPEAKER_00: it's
41:16
SPEAKER_00: a
41:16
SPEAKER_00: it's
41:16
SPEAKER_00: hard.
41:17
SPEAKER_00: So
41:17
SPEAKER_00: if
41:17
SPEAKER_00: you're
41:18
SPEAKER_00: going
41:18
SPEAKER_00: through
41:18
SPEAKER_00: that,
41:19
SPEAKER_00: I
41:19
SPEAKER_00: just
41:19
SPEAKER_00: want
41:19
SPEAKER_00: you
41:20
SPEAKER_00: to
41:20
SPEAKER_00: know
41:20
SPEAKER_00: that
41:20
SPEAKER_00: I
41:20
SPEAKER_00: I
41:21
SPEAKER_00: get
41:21
SPEAKER_00: it
41:21
SPEAKER_00: and
41:21
SPEAKER_00: it's
41:22
SPEAKER_00: hard.
41:22
SPEAKER_00: And
41:23
SPEAKER_00: um
41:23
SPEAKER_00: I'm
41:24
SPEAKER_00: sorry
41:24
SPEAKER_00: that
41:24
SPEAKER_00: you're
41:25
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
41:25
SPEAKER_00: it.
41:26
SPEAKER_00: And
41:26
SPEAKER_00: I
41:26
SPEAKER_00: and
41:26
SPEAKER_00: I
41:26
SPEAKER_00: want
41:27
SPEAKER_00: you
41:27
SPEAKER_00: to
41:27
SPEAKER_00: know
41:28
SPEAKER_00: that
41:28
SPEAKER_00: there's
41:29
SPEAKER_00: a
41:29
SPEAKER_00: solution.
41:30
SPEAKER_00: There
41:30
SPEAKER_00: is
41:30
SPEAKER_00: a
41:30
SPEAKER_00: solution,
41:32
SPEAKER_00: and
41:33
SPEAKER_00: it's
41:34
SPEAKER_00: faster
41:35
SPEAKER_00: than
41:36
SPEAKER_00: you
41:36
SPEAKER_00: know.
41:37
SPEAKER_00: It
41:37
SPEAKER_00: does
41:37
SPEAKER_00: take
41:38
SPEAKER_00: commitment
41:39
SPEAKER_00: because
41:40
SPEAKER_00: narcissism
41:41
SPEAKER_00: is
41:41
SPEAKER_00: coming
41:41
SPEAKER_00: out
41:42
SPEAKER_00: of
41:42
SPEAKER_00: an
41:42
SPEAKER_00: addictive
41:43
SPEAKER_00: prison,
41:44
SPEAKER_00: it
41:44
SPEAKER_00: it
41:44
SPEAKER_00: does
41:44
SPEAKER_00: take
41:45
SPEAKER_00: a
41:45
SPEAKER_00: commitment
41:46
SPEAKER_00: to
41:46
SPEAKER_00: your
41:46
SPEAKER_00: future
41:46
SPEAKER_00: self
41:47
SPEAKER_00: because
41:47
SPEAKER_00: it
41:48
SPEAKER_00: collapses
41:49
SPEAKER_00: the
41:49
SPEAKER_00: identity
41:50
SPEAKER_00: that
41:50
SPEAKER_00: they
41:50
SPEAKER_00: created.
41:51
SPEAKER_00: So
41:52
SPEAKER_00: let's
41:53
SPEAKER_00: say,
41:53
SPEAKER_00: for
41:53
SPEAKER_00: instance,
41:53
SPEAKER_00: that
41:53
SPEAKER_00: you
41:54
SPEAKER_00: had
41:54
SPEAKER_00: a
41:54
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
41:55
SPEAKER_00: parent,
41:57
SPEAKER_00: they
41:57
SPEAKER_00: created
41:58
SPEAKER_00: an
41:58
SPEAKER_00: identity
41:58
SPEAKER_00: for
41:59
SPEAKER_00: you.
42:00
SPEAKER_00: And
42:00
SPEAKER_00: when
42:01
SPEAKER_00: you
42:01
SPEAKER_00: begin
42:01
SPEAKER_00: to
42:02
SPEAKER_00: heal,
42:03
SPEAKER_00: that
42:03
SPEAKER_00: identity
42:04
SPEAKER_00: collapses
42:05
SPEAKER_00: because
42:06
SPEAKER_00: it
42:06
SPEAKER_00: was
42:06
SPEAKER_00: one
42:06
SPEAKER_00: built
42:07
SPEAKER_00: on
42:07
SPEAKER_00: fear
42:07
SPEAKER_00: and
42:07
SPEAKER_00: shame
42:08
SPEAKER_00: and
42:08
SPEAKER_00: scarcity,
42:09
SPEAKER_00: and
42:09
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:09
SPEAKER_00: not
42:09
SPEAKER_00: enough,
42:10
SPEAKER_00: and
42:10
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:10
SPEAKER_00: not
42:10
SPEAKER_00: worthy,
42:11
SPEAKER_00: and
42:11
SPEAKER_00: this
42:11
SPEAKER_00: is
42:12
SPEAKER_00: all
42:12
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:12
SPEAKER_00: ever
42:12
SPEAKER_00: gonna
42:13
SPEAKER_00: get
42:13
SPEAKER_00: out
42:13
SPEAKER_00: of
42:13
SPEAKER_00: life.
42:14
SPEAKER_00: And
42:14
SPEAKER_00: then
42:14
SPEAKER_00: your
42:14
SPEAKER_00: higher
42:15
SPEAKER_00: self
42:15
SPEAKER_00: is
42:15
SPEAKER_00: gonna
42:16
SPEAKER_00: come
42:16
SPEAKER_00: in
42:16
SPEAKER_00: and
42:16
SPEAKER_00: they're
42:17
SPEAKER_00: like
42:17
SPEAKER_00: pure,
42:18
SPEAKER_00: unconditional
42:19
SPEAKER_00: love.
42:19
SPEAKER_00: And
42:20
SPEAKER_00: they're
42:20
SPEAKER_00: like,
42:20
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:20
SPEAKER_00: totally
42:21
SPEAKER_00: worthy.
42:21
SPEAKER_00: You
42:21
SPEAKER_00: don't,
42:22
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:22
SPEAKER_00: not
42:22
SPEAKER_00: broken,
42:23
SPEAKER_00: like
42:23
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:24
SPEAKER_00: perfect,
42:25
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:25
SPEAKER_00: beautiful,
42:25
SPEAKER_00: you're
42:26
SPEAKER_00: exactly
42:26
SPEAKER_00: who
42:26
SPEAKER_00: I
42:26
SPEAKER_00: hoped
42:27
SPEAKER_00: you
42:27
SPEAKER_00: would
42:28
SPEAKER_00: be.
42:28
SPEAKER_00: That
42:29
SPEAKER_00: identity
42:30
SPEAKER_00: is
42:30
SPEAKER_00: in
42:30
SPEAKER_00: direct
42:31
SPEAKER_00: conflict
42:31
SPEAKER_00: with
42:31
SPEAKER_00: the
42:32
SPEAKER_00: identity
42:32
SPEAKER_00: that
42:32
SPEAKER_00: the
42:33
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
42:34
SPEAKER_00: system
42:34
SPEAKER_00: created
42:35
SPEAKER_00: for
42:36
SPEAKER_00: you,
42:37
SPEAKER_00: so
42:37
SPEAKER_00: you'll
42:37
SPEAKER_00: clash
42:38
SPEAKER_00: with
42:38
SPEAKER_00: your
42:38
SPEAKER_00: higher
42:39
SPEAKER_00: self
42:40
SPEAKER_00: because
42:40
SPEAKER_00: the
42:40
SPEAKER_00: opposing
42:41
SPEAKER_00: identities
42:42
SPEAKER_00: need
42:42
SPEAKER_00: to
42:43
SPEAKER_00: be
42:43
SPEAKER_00: resolved.
42:44
SPEAKER_00: And
42:44
SPEAKER_00: that's
42:45
SPEAKER_00: where
42:45
SPEAKER_00: getting
42:46
SPEAKER_00: help
42:46
SPEAKER_00: from
42:46
SPEAKER_00: someone
42:47
SPEAKER_00: who
42:47
SPEAKER_00: can
42:47
SPEAKER_00: see
42:47
SPEAKER_00: the
42:47
SPEAKER_00: real
42:48
SPEAKER_00: you,
42:48
SPEAKER_00: the
42:48
SPEAKER_00: real,
42:49
SPEAKER_00: real
42:49
SPEAKER_00: you,
42:50
SPEAKER_00: not
42:50
SPEAKER_00: the
42:50
SPEAKER_00: one
42:50
SPEAKER_00: that
42:50
SPEAKER_00: they
42:51
SPEAKER_00: made
42:51
SPEAKER_00: you
42:51
SPEAKER_00: believe
42:51
SPEAKER_00: you
42:51
SPEAKER_00: were,
42:52
SPEAKER_00: but
42:52
SPEAKER_00: the
42:52
SPEAKER_00: real
42:52
SPEAKER_00: you.
42:53
SPEAKER_00: And
42:54
SPEAKER_00: in
42:54
SPEAKER_00: community.
42:55
SPEAKER_00: Because
42:56
SPEAKER_00: now,
42:56
SPEAKER_00: whenever
42:56
SPEAKER_00: I
42:57
SPEAKER_00: go
42:57
SPEAKER_00: into
42:57
SPEAKER_00: a
42:57
SPEAKER_00: little
42:57
SPEAKER_00: shame
42:58
SPEAKER_00: spiral,
42:59
SPEAKER_00: I
42:59
SPEAKER_00: call
43:00
SPEAKER_00: someone
43:00
SPEAKER_00: and
43:00
SPEAKER_00: I
43:01
SPEAKER_00: say,
43:01
SPEAKER_00: okay,
43:01
SPEAKER_00: I'm
43:02
SPEAKER_00: having
43:02
SPEAKER_00: a
43:02
SPEAKER_00: shame
43:02
SPEAKER_00: spiral,
43:03
SPEAKER_00: and
43:03
SPEAKER_00: this
43:03
SPEAKER_00: is
43:03
SPEAKER_00: what
43:04
SPEAKER_00: it
43:04
SPEAKER_00: feels
43:04
SPEAKER_00: like
43:04
SPEAKER_00: in
43:04
SPEAKER_00: my
43:05
SPEAKER_00: body,
43:05
SPEAKER_00: and
43:06
SPEAKER_00: I
43:06
SPEAKER_00: need
43:06
SPEAKER_00: to
43:06
SPEAKER_00: just
43:07
SPEAKER_00: say
43:07
SPEAKER_00: it
43:07
SPEAKER_00: out
43:07
SPEAKER_00: loud
43:08
SPEAKER_00: so
43:08
SPEAKER_00: that
43:08
SPEAKER_00: somebody
43:09
SPEAKER_00: outside
43:09
SPEAKER_00: of
43:10
SPEAKER_00: me
43:10
SPEAKER_00: is
43:10
SPEAKER_00: witness
43:11
SPEAKER_00: to
43:11
SPEAKER_00: it,
43:11
SPEAKER_00: and
43:11
SPEAKER_00: then
43:12
SPEAKER_00: all
43:12
SPEAKER_00: of
43:12
SPEAKER_00: a
43:12
SPEAKER_00: sudden
43:12
SPEAKER_00: it
43:13
SPEAKER_00: just
43:13
SPEAKER_00: goes
43:13
SPEAKER_00: away.
43:14
SPEAKER_00: Because
43:14
SPEAKER_00: shame
43:15
SPEAKER_00: can
43:15
SPEAKER_00: only
43:15
SPEAKER_00: grow
43:16
SPEAKER_00: in
43:16
SPEAKER_00: silence,
43:17
SPEAKER_00: right?
43:17
SPEAKER_00: It
43:17
SPEAKER_00: only
43:18
SPEAKER_00: anchors
43:18
SPEAKER_00: into
43:19
SPEAKER_00: your
43:19
SPEAKER_00: identity
43:20
SPEAKER_00: without
43:20
SPEAKER_00: expressing
43:21
SPEAKER_00: it
43:21
SPEAKER_00: to
43:21
SPEAKER_00: another
43:22
SPEAKER_00: person.
43:23
SPEAKER_00: Shame
43:23
SPEAKER_00: will
43:24
SPEAKER_00: make
43:24
SPEAKER_00: you
43:25
SPEAKER_00: sick.
43:26
SPEAKER_00: Do
43:26
SPEAKER_00: not
43:27
SPEAKER_00: underestimate
43:29
SPEAKER_00: the
43:30
SPEAKER_00: cost
43:30
SPEAKER_00: of
43:30
SPEAKER_00: shame
43:31
SPEAKER_00: on
43:31
SPEAKER_00: your
43:32
SPEAKER_00: health.
43:33
SPEAKER_00: We
43:34
SPEAKER_00: were
43:34
SPEAKER_00: in
43:34
SPEAKER_00: a
43:34
SPEAKER_00: um
43:35
SPEAKER_00: uh
43:35
SPEAKER_00: a
43:36
SPEAKER_00: class
43:36
SPEAKER_00: the
43:36
SPEAKER_00: other
43:37
SPEAKER_00: day,
43:37
SPEAKER_00: and
43:37
SPEAKER_00: I
43:38
SPEAKER_00: said,
43:38
SPEAKER_00: I
43:38
SPEAKER_00: don't
43:39
SPEAKER_00: know
43:39
SPEAKER_00: how
43:39
SPEAKER_00: to
43:39
SPEAKER_00: put
43:39
SPEAKER_00: a
43:40
SPEAKER_00: value
43:40
SPEAKER_00: on
43:40
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
43:41
SPEAKER_00: abuse
43:42
SPEAKER_00: recovery.
43:42
SPEAKER_00: I
43:42
SPEAKER_00: don't
43:42
SPEAKER_00: know
43:43
SPEAKER_00: how
43:43
SPEAKER_00: to
43:43
SPEAKER_00: give
43:43
SPEAKER_00: it
43:43
SPEAKER_00: a
43:43
SPEAKER_00: dollar
43:44
SPEAKER_00: value.
43:45
SPEAKER_00: And
43:46
SPEAKER_00: the
43:46
SPEAKER_00: coach
43:46
SPEAKER_00: asked
43:47
SPEAKER_00: me,
43:47
SPEAKER_00: Well,
43:47
SPEAKER_00: how
43:47
SPEAKER_00: much
43:48
SPEAKER_00: did
43:48
SPEAKER_00: you
43:48
SPEAKER_00: pay?
43:48
SPEAKER_00: And
43:48
SPEAKER_00: I'm
43:49
SPEAKER_00: like,
43:50
SPEAKER_00: to
43:50
SPEAKER_00: be
43:51
SPEAKER_00: honest,
43:51
SPEAKER_00: I've
43:52
SPEAKER_00: probably
43:52
SPEAKER_00: paid
43:53
SPEAKER_00: about
43:53
SPEAKER_00: $300,000
43:54
SPEAKER_00: to
43:55
SPEAKER_00: get
43:55
SPEAKER_00: outfit.
43:56
SPEAKER_00: And
43:57
SPEAKER_00: there's
43:58
SPEAKER_00: no
43:58
SPEAKER_00: way
43:58
SPEAKER_00: I'm
43:58
SPEAKER_00: gonna
43:58
SPEAKER_00: ever
43:59
SPEAKER_00: charge
43:59
SPEAKER_00: anyone
43:59
SPEAKER_00: that
44:00
SPEAKER_00: because
44:00
SPEAKER_00: I
44:00
SPEAKER_00: think
44:00
SPEAKER_00: that
44:00
SPEAKER_00: it
44:01
SPEAKER_00: should
44:01
SPEAKER_00: be
44:01
SPEAKER_00: free,
44:01
SPEAKER_00: number
44:02
SPEAKER_00: one.
44:02
SPEAKER_00: And
44:02
SPEAKER_00: I
44:03
SPEAKER_00: I
44:03
SPEAKER_00: don't
44:03
SPEAKER_00: think
44:04
SPEAKER_00: that,
44:04
SPEAKER_00: like,
44:05
SPEAKER_00: had
44:05
SPEAKER_00: I
44:06
SPEAKER_00: known
44:06
SPEAKER_00: it
44:06
SPEAKER_00: was
44:06
SPEAKER_00: gonna
44:07
SPEAKER_00: cost
44:07
SPEAKER_00: me
44:07
SPEAKER_00: that
44:07
SPEAKER_00: much
44:07
SPEAKER_00: money
44:08
SPEAKER_00: when
44:08
SPEAKER_00: I
44:08
SPEAKER_00: started
44:09
SPEAKER_00: it,
44:09
SPEAKER_00: if
44:09
SPEAKER_00: I
44:09
SPEAKER_00: had
44:10
SPEAKER_00: known
44:10
SPEAKER_00: how
44:10
SPEAKER_00: messy
44:10
SPEAKER_00: it
44:11
SPEAKER_00: was
44:11
SPEAKER_00: gonna
44:11
SPEAKER_00: be
44:12
SPEAKER_00: and
44:12
SPEAKER_00: how
44:12
SPEAKER_00: many
44:12
SPEAKER_00: different
44:13
SPEAKER_00: professionals
44:14
SPEAKER_00: I
44:14
SPEAKER_00: would
44:14
SPEAKER_00: seek
44:14
SPEAKER_00: out
44:14
SPEAKER_00: that
44:15
SPEAKER_00: were
44:15
SPEAKER_00: selling
44:16
SPEAKER_00: a
44:17
SPEAKER_00: promise
44:17
SPEAKER_00: that
44:17
SPEAKER_00: they
44:18
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
44:18
SPEAKER_00: deliver
44:19
SPEAKER_00: on,
44:19
SPEAKER_00: um,
44:20
SPEAKER_00: which
44:20
SPEAKER_00: just
44:20
SPEAKER_00: left
44:20
SPEAKER_00: me
44:21
SPEAKER_00: feeling
44:21
SPEAKER_00: more
44:21
SPEAKER_00: broken
44:21
SPEAKER_00: and
44:22
SPEAKER_00: more
44:22
SPEAKER_00: frustrated.
44:23
SPEAKER_00: If
44:23
SPEAKER_00: I
44:23
SPEAKER_00: had
44:24
SPEAKER_00: known
44:24
SPEAKER_00: then
44:24
SPEAKER_00: that
44:25
SPEAKER_00: the
44:25
SPEAKER_00: cost,
44:25
SPEAKER_00: I
44:26
SPEAKER_00: wouldn't
44:26
SPEAKER_00: have
44:26
SPEAKER_00: started
44:27
SPEAKER_00: the
44:27
SPEAKER_00: journey.
44:28
SPEAKER_00: So
44:28
SPEAKER_00: I'm
44:29
SPEAKER_00: gonna
44:29
SPEAKER_00: tell
44:30
SPEAKER_00: you
44:30
SPEAKER_00: right
44:30
SPEAKER_00: now
44:31
SPEAKER_00: that
44:32
SPEAKER_00: um
44:33
SPEAKER_00: when
44:33
SPEAKER_00: you
44:34
SPEAKER_00: work
44:34
SPEAKER_00: with
44:34
SPEAKER_00: me,
44:34
SPEAKER_00: the
44:34
SPEAKER_00: cost
44:35
SPEAKER_00: is
44:35
SPEAKER_00: nowhere
44:35
SPEAKER_00: near
44:35
SPEAKER_00: $300,000,
44:37
SPEAKER_00: even
44:37
SPEAKER_00: though
44:37
SPEAKER_00: that
44:37
SPEAKER_00: was
44:38
SPEAKER_00: my
44:38
SPEAKER_00: investment.
44:39
SPEAKER_00: I
44:39
SPEAKER_00: want
44:39
SPEAKER_00: you
44:39
SPEAKER_00: to
44:40
SPEAKER_00: know
44:40
SPEAKER_00: though
44:40
SPEAKER_00: that
44:40
SPEAKER_00: it
44:41
SPEAKER_00: costs
44:41
SPEAKER_00: you
44:41
SPEAKER_00: a
44:42
SPEAKER_00: lot
44:42
SPEAKER_00: of
44:42
SPEAKER_00: money
44:43
SPEAKER_00: because
44:43
SPEAKER_00: if
44:44
SPEAKER_00: you're
44:44
SPEAKER_00: physically
44:44
SPEAKER_00: sick
44:45
SPEAKER_00: all
44:45
SPEAKER_00: of
44:45
SPEAKER_00: the
44:45
SPEAKER_00: time,
44:46
SPEAKER_00: like
44:46
SPEAKER_00: your
44:46
SPEAKER_00: back
44:47
SPEAKER_00: is
44:47
SPEAKER_00: always
44:47
SPEAKER_00: going
44:48
SPEAKER_00: out,
44:48
SPEAKER_00: or
44:48
SPEAKER_00: you're
44:48
SPEAKER_00: you're
44:49
SPEAKER_00: having
44:49
SPEAKER_00: migraines,
44:50
SPEAKER_00: you're
44:51
SPEAKER_00: having
44:51
SPEAKER_00: chronic
44:52
SPEAKER_00: fatigue
44:52
SPEAKER_00: issues,
44:53
SPEAKER_00: um,
44:54
SPEAKER_00: you're
44:54
SPEAKER_00: not
44:54
SPEAKER_00: able
44:55
SPEAKER_00: to
44:55
SPEAKER_00: make
44:55
SPEAKER_00: the
44:55
SPEAKER_00: kind
44:56
SPEAKER_00: of
44:56
SPEAKER_00: money
44:57
SPEAKER_00: that
44:57
SPEAKER_00: you
44:57
SPEAKER_00: would
44:58
SPEAKER_00: if
44:58
SPEAKER_00: those
44:58
SPEAKER_00: things
44:59
SPEAKER_00: were
44:59
SPEAKER_00: not
45:00
SPEAKER_00: blocking
45:00
SPEAKER_00: you.
45:01
SPEAKER_00: And
45:01
SPEAKER_00: if
45:02
SPEAKER_00: you've
45:02
SPEAKER_00: ever
45:02
SPEAKER_00: said
45:02
SPEAKER_00: to
45:02
SPEAKER_00: yourself,
45:03
SPEAKER_00: well,
45:03
SPEAKER_00: I'm
45:03
SPEAKER_00: just
45:03
SPEAKER_00: lazy,
45:04
SPEAKER_00: that's
45:04
SPEAKER_00: why
45:04
SPEAKER_00: I
45:04
SPEAKER_00: can't
45:04
SPEAKER_00: stick
45:05
SPEAKER_00: to
45:05
SPEAKER_00: a
45:05
SPEAKER_00: gym
45:05
SPEAKER_00: routine,
45:06
SPEAKER_00: that's
45:07
SPEAKER_00: not
45:07
SPEAKER_00: true.
45:09
SPEAKER_00: Your
45:09
SPEAKER_00: nervous
45:10
SPEAKER_00: system
45:11
SPEAKER_00: is
45:12
SPEAKER_00: not
45:12
SPEAKER_00: calibrating
45:13
SPEAKER_00: correctly.
45:14
SPEAKER_00: And
45:14
SPEAKER_00: that's
45:15
SPEAKER_00: when
45:15
SPEAKER_00: we
45:15
SPEAKER_00: have
45:16
SPEAKER_00: to
45:16
SPEAKER_00: identify
45:17
SPEAKER_00: the
45:17
SPEAKER_00: block
45:18
SPEAKER_00: in
45:18
SPEAKER_00: your
45:18
SPEAKER_00: system
45:20
SPEAKER_00: that
45:20
SPEAKER_00: is
45:20
SPEAKER_00: preventing
45:21
SPEAKER_00: you
45:21
SPEAKER_00: from
45:21
SPEAKER_00: taking
45:22
SPEAKER_00: action
45:22
SPEAKER_00: with
45:22
SPEAKER_00: the
45:22
SPEAKER_00: person
45:23
SPEAKER_00: you
45:23
SPEAKER_00: were
45:23
SPEAKER_00: meant
45:23
SPEAKER_00: to
45:23
SPEAKER_00: become.
45:24
SPEAKER_00: Now,
45:25
SPEAKER_00: that's
45:25
SPEAKER_00: what
45:25
SPEAKER_00: I
45:25
SPEAKER_00: have
45:25
SPEAKER_00: developed
45:26
SPEAKER_00: in
45:26
SPEAKER_00: Soma
45:27
SPEAKER_00: Tribe.
45:27
SPEAKER_00: Um,
45:27
SPEAKER_00: and
45:27
SPEAKER_00: I
45:28
SPEAKER_00: am
45:28
SPEAKER_00: also,
45:28
SPEAKER_00: if
45:28
SPEAKER_00: you're
45:29
SPEAKER_00: interested,
45:30
SPEAKER_00: I
45:30
SPEAKER_00: am
45:30
SPEAKER_00: going
45:30
SPEAKER_00: to
45:31
SPEAKER_00: be
45:31
SPEAKER_00: launching
45:31
SPEAKER_00: a
45:32
SPEAKER_00: new
45:32
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
45:34
SPEAKER_00: healing
45:34
SPEAKER_00: program
45:35
SPEAKER_00: that's
45:36
SPEAKER_00: just
45:36
SPEAKER_00: focused
45:37
SPEAKER_00: on
45:37
SPEAKER_00: education
45:38
SPEAKER_00: and
45:39
SPEAKER_00: um
45:39
SPEAKER_00: healing
45:40
SPEAKER_00: for
45:40
SPEAKER_00: people
45:41
SPEAKER_00: who've
45:41
SPEAKER_00: endured
45:42
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
45:42
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
45:43
SPEAKER_00: It's
45:43
SPEAKER_00: going
45:43
SPEAKER_00: to
45:43
SPEAKER_00: be
45:44
SPEAKER_00: a
45:44
SPEAKER_00: three-month
45:44
SPEAKER_00: container,
45:46
SPEAKER_00: and
45:46
SPEAKER_00: it's
45:46
SPEAKER_00: going
45:47
SPEAKER_00: to
45:47
SPEAKER_00: be
45:47
SPEAKER_00: like
45:48
SPEAKER_00: very
45:49
SPEAKER_00: interactive
45:50
SPEAKER_00: and
45:50
SPEAKER_00: heavily
45:51
SPEAKER_00: supported.
45:52
SPEAKER_00: Because
45:52
SPEAKER_00: looking
45:53
SPEAKER_00: back
45:54
SPEAKER_00: at
45:54
SPEAKER_00: the
45:54
SPEAKER_00: beginning
45:55
SPEAKER_00: of
45:55
SPEAKER_00: the
45:55
SPEAKER_00: journey,
45:56
SPEAKER_00: I
45:57
SPEAKER_00: think
45:57
SPEAKER_00: if
45:57
SPEAKER_00: I
45:57
SPEAKER_00: had
45:57
SPEAKER_00: been
45:58
SPEAKER_00: in
45:58
SPEAKER_00: a
45:58
SPEAKER_00: container
45:59
SPEAKER_00: like
45:59
SPEAKER_00: that,
45:59
SPEAKER_00: it
46:00
SPEAKER_00: would
46:00
SPEAKER_00: have
46:00
SPEAKER_00: been
46:00
SPEAKER_00: a
46:00
SPEAKER_00: lot
46:01
SPEAKER_00: smoother.
46:02
SPEAKER_00: Um,
46:02
SPEAKER_00: but
46:02
SPEAKER_00: I
46:03
SPEAKER_00: kept
46:03
SPEAKER_00: denying
46:04
SPEAKER_00: and
46:04
SPEAKER_00: and
46:05
SPEAKER_00: denying
46:05
SPEAKER_00: and
46:05
SPEAKER_00: denying.
46:06
SPEAKER_00: And
46:06
SPEAKER_00: I
46:06
SPEAKER_00: looked
46:07
SPEAKER_00: and
46:07
SPEAKER_00: I
46:07
SPEAKER_00: looked
46:07
SPEAKER_00: and
46:08
SPEAKER_00: I
46:08
SPEAKER_00: looked,
46:09
SPEAKER_00: and
46:09
SPEAKER_00: I
46:09
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
46:09
SPEAKER_00: find
46:10
SPEAKER_00: something
46:10
SPEAKER_00: like
46:10
SPEAKER_00: what
46:10
SPEAKER_00: I'm
46:11
SPEAKER_00: creating
46:11
SPEAKER_00: right
46:11
SPEAKER_00: now.
46:12
SPEAKER_00: And
46:12
SPEAKER_00: I'm
46:12
SPEAKER_00: pretty
46:12
SPEAKER_00: sure
46:13
SPEAKER_00: that's
46:13
SPEAKER_00: why
46:13
SPEAKER_00: I'm
46:14
SPEAKER_00: creating
46:14
SPEAKER_00: it.
46:14
SPEAKER_00: Because
46:15
SPEAKER_00: I'm
46:15
SPEAKER_00: creating
46:15
SPEAKER_00: the
46:16
SPEAKER_00: program
46:16
SPEAKER_00: that
46:16
SPEAKER_00: me
46:16
SPEAKER_00: in
46:17
SPEAKER_00: 2019
46:17
SPEAKER_00: needed,
46:18
SPEAKER_00: that
46:18
SPEAKER_00: me
46:18
SPEAKER_00: in
46:18
SPEAKER_00: 2014
46:19
SPEAKER_00: needed,
46:20
SPEAKER_00: that
46:20
SPEAKER_00: me
46:20
SPEAKER_00: in
46:21
SPEAKER_00: 1993
46:23
SPEAKER_00: needed.
46:23
SPEAKER_00: I'm
46:24
SPEAKER_00: creating
46:25
SPEAKER_00: the
46:25
SPEAKER_00: program
46:26
SPEAKER_00: that
46:26
SPEAKER_00: my
46:26
SPEAKER_00: younger
46:27
SPEAKER_00: self
46:27
SPEAKER_00: is
46:27
SPEAKER_00: begging
46:28
SPEAKER_00: me
46:28
SPEAKER_00: to
46:29
SPEAKER_00: create
46:29
SPEAKER_00: so
46:30
SPEAKER_00: that
46:30
SPEAKER_00: other
46:31
SPEAKER_00: people
46:32
SPEAKER_00: don't
46:32
SPEAKER_00: have
46:32
SPEAKER_00: to
46:33
SPEAKER_00: live
46:34
SPEAKER_00: this
46:35
SPEAKER_00: prison
46:36
SPEAKER_00: sentence.
46:36
SPEAKER_00: And
46:37
SPEAKER_00: I
46:37
SPEAKER_00: I've
46:37
SPEAKER_00: said
46:37
SPEAKER_00: this
46:38
SPEAKER_00: to
46:38
SPEAKER_00: a
46:38
SPEAKER_00: lot
46:38
SPEAKER_00: of
46:38
SPEAKER_00: people
46:38
SPEAKER_00: where
46:38
SPEAKER_00: I'm
46:39
SPEAKER_00: like,
46:39
SPEAKER_00: I
46:39
SPEAKER_00: feel
46:40
SPEAKER_00: like
46:40
SPEAKER_00: it's
46:40
SPEAKER_00: not
46:41
SPEAKER_00: fair
46:41
SPEAKER_00: because
46:42
SPEAKER_00: coming
46:42
SPEAKER_00: out
46:42
SPEAKER_00: of
46:43
SPEAKER_00: that
46:43
SPEAKER_00: imprisonment
46:44
SPEAKER_00: of
46:44
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
46:45
SPEAKER_00: abuse
46:46
SPEAKER_00: is
46:46
SPEAKER_00: hard.
46:47
SPEAKER_00: And
46:47
SPEAKER_00: it's
46:48
SPEAKER_00: like
46:48
SPEAKER_00: it's
46:49
SPEAKER_00: probably
46:49
SPEAKER_00: the
46:49
SPEAKER_00: hardest
46:50
SPEAKER_00: thing
46:50
SPEAKER_00: I've
46:50
SPEAKER_00: ever
46:50
SPEAKER_00: had
46:51
SPEAKER_00: to
46:51
SPEAKER_00: do.
46:52
SPEAKER_00: And
46:52
SPEAKER_00: people
46:53
SPEAKER_00: will
46:53
SPEAKER_00: ask,
46:53
SPEAKER_00: like,
46:54
SPEAKER_00: why
46:54
SPEAKER_00: I
46:54
SPEAKER_00: did
46:55
SPEAKER_00: it,
46:55
SPEAKER_00: why
46:55
SPEAKER_00: what
46:55
SPEAKER_00: kept
46:56
SPEAKER_00: me
46:56
SPEAKER_00: focused
46:56
SPEAKER_00: and
46:56
SPEAKER_00: committed.
46:57
SPEAKER_00: And
46:58
SPEAKER_00: it's
46:58
SPEAKER_00: because
46:58
SPEAKER_00: of
46:59
SPEAKER_00: my
46:59
SPEAKER_00: my
46:59
SPEAKER_00: daughter
47:00
SPEAKER_00: and
47:00
SPEAKER_00: my
47:00
SPEAKER_00: son.
47:02
SPEAKER_00: Because
47:02
SPEAKER_00: when
47:03
SPEAKER_00: I
47:03
SPEAKER_00: started
47:04
SPEAKER_00: understanding
47:05
SPEAKER_00: energy,
47:05
SPEAKER_00: epigenetics,
47:07
SPEAKER_00: and
47:07
SPEAKER_00: um
47:08
SPEAKER_00: familial
47:09
SPEAKER_00: patterns,
47:10
SPEAKER_00: not
47:10
SPEAKER_00: only
47:11
SPEAKER_00: through
47:11
SPEAKER_00: learned
47:12
SPEAKER_00: behavior
47:13
SPEAKER_00: and
47:14
SPEAKER_00: um
47:15
SPEAKER_00: you
47:15
SPEAKER_00: know
47:16
SPEAKER_00: beliefs,
47:17
SPEAKER_00: but
47:17
SPEAKER_00: from
47:17
SPEAKER_00: energy,
47:18
SPEAKER_00: I
47:19
SPEAKER_00: realized
47:19
SPEAKER_00: that
47:19
SPEAKER_00: if
47:20
SPEAKER_00: I
47:20
SPEAKER_00: healed,
47:21
SPEAKER_00: they
47:21
SPEAKER_00: would
47:21
SPEAKER_00: heal.
47:22
SPEAKER_00: And
47:22
SPEAKER_00: that
47:22
SPEAKER_00: the
47:23
SPEAKER_00: more
47:23
SPEAKER_00: I
47:23
SPEAKER_00: worked
47:23
SPEAKER_00: on
47:24
SPEAKER_00: myself,
47:24
SPEAKER_00: they
47:25
SPEAKER_00: didn't
47:25
SPEAKER_00: even
47:25
SPEAKER_00: have
47:25
SPEAKER_00: to
47:25
SPEAKER_00: go
47:25
SPEAKER_00: to
47:26
SPEAKER_00: therapy.
47:26
SPEAKER_00: They
47:27
SPEAKER_00: just
47:27
SPEAKER_00: received
47:28
SPEAKER_00: the
47:28
SPEAKER_00: benefit.
47:29
SPEAKER_00: Now,
47:30
SPEAKER_00: I
47:30
SPEAKER_00: think
47:31
SPEAKER_00: that's
47:31
SPEAKER_00: partly
47:32
SPEAKER_00: because
47:32
SPEAKER_00: I
47:32
SPEAKER_00: show
47:32
SPEAKER_00: up
47:32
SPEAKER_00: as
47:33
SPEAKER_00: a
47:33
SPEAKER_00: different
47:33
SPEAKER_00: mom.
47:34
SPEAKER_00: Um,
47:34
SPEAKER_00: I'm
47:35
SPEAKER_00: very
47:35
SPEAKER_00: uh
47:36
SPEAKER_00: self-aware
47:37
SPEAKER_00: and
47:37
SPEAKER_00: I
47:37
SPEAKER_00: am
47:38
SPEAKER_00: very
47:38
SPEAKER_00: self-reflective.
47:39
SPEAKER_00: So
47:39
SPEAKER_00: if
47:39
SPEAKER_00: my
47:39
SPEAKER_00: kids
47:40
SPEAKER_00: make
47:40
SPEAKER_00: a
47:40
SPEAKER_00: complaint,
47:41
SPEAKER_00: or
47:41
SPEAKER_00: you
47:41
SPEAKER_00: know,
47:42
SPEAKER_00: they're
47:42
SPEAKER_00: teenagers,
47:42
SPEAKER_00: they
47:42
SPEAKER_00: should
47:43
SPEAKER_00: make
47:43
SPEAKER_00: complaints.
47:43
SPEAKER_00: So
47:43
SPEAKER_00: no,
47:44
SPEAKER_00: that's
47:44
SPEAKER_00: their
47:45
SPEAKER_00: job,
47:45
SPEAKER_00: right?
47:46
SPEAKER_00: But
47:46
SPEAKER_00: I
47:46
SPEAKER_00: mean,
47:46
SPEAKER_00: I
47:46
SPEAKER_00: don't,
47:47
SPEAKER_00: my
47:47
SPEAKER_00: daughter's
47:47
SPEAKER_00: not
47:48
SPEAKER_00: a
47:48
SPEAKER_00: teenager
47:48
SPEAKER_00: anymore.
47:49
SPEAKER_00: Oh
47:49
SPEAKER_00: my
47:49
SPEAKER_00: God,
47:49
SPEAKER_00: she
47:49
SPEAKER_00: is
47:50
SPEAKER_00: now
47:50
SPEAKER_00: 20.
47:50
SPEAKER_00: Okay,
47:51
SPEAKER_00: so
47:51
SPEAKER_00: um
47:52
SPEAKER_00: if
47:53
SPEAKER_00: if
47:54
SPEAKER_00: you
47:54
SPEAKER_00: know
47:54
SPEAKER_00: they
47:55
SPEAKER_00: if
47:55
SPEAKER_00: they're
47:55
SPEAKER_00: complaining
47:56
SPEAKER_00: and
47:56
SPEAKER_00: stuff
47:56
SPEAKER_00: like
47:56
SPEAKER_00: that,
47:57
SPEAKER_00: I
47:57
SPEAKER_00: like
47:57
SPEAKER_00: to
47:57
SPEAKER_00: be
47:57
SPEAKER_00: self-aware
47:58
SPEAKER_00: enough
47:58
SPEAKER_00: to
47:58
SPEAKER_00: go,
47:59
SPEAKER_00: okay,
47:59
SPEAKER_00: is
47:59
SPEAKER_00: that
48:00
SPEAKER_00: from
48:00
SPEAKER_00: me?
48:00
SPEAKER_00: Is
48:01
SPEAKER_00: that
48:01
SPEAKER_00: because
48:02
SPEAKER_00: of,
48:03
SPEAKER_00: you
48:03
SPEAKER_00: know,
48:04
SPEAKER_00: my
48:04
SPEAKER_00: old
48:04
SPEAKER_00: codependent
48:05
SPEAKER_00: strategies?
48:06
SPEAKER_00: Um,
48:06
SPEAKER_00: or,
48:07
SPEAKER_00: you
48:07
SPEAKER_00: know,
48:07
SPEAKER_00: do
48:08
SPEAKER_00: I
48:08
SPEAKER_00: try
48:08
SPEAKER_00: to
48:09
SPEAKER_00: take
48:09
SPEAKER_00: it
48:09
SPEAKER_00: into
48:09
SPEAKER_00: account
48:10
SPEAKER_00: and
48:10
SPEAKER_00: and
48:10
SPEAKER_00: question
48:10
SPEAKER_00: it.
48:11
SPEAKER_00: I'm
48:11
SPEAKER_00: always
48:11
SPEAKER_00: in
48:11
SPEAKER_00: inquiry
48:12
SPEAKER_00: with
48:12
SPEAKER_00: myself
48:13
SPEAKER_00: about
48:13
SPEAKER_00: my
48:13
SPEAKER_00: own
48:14
SPEAKER_00: behavior
48:15
SPEAKER_00: because
48:15
SPEAKER_00: I
48:16
SPEAKER_00: think
48:16
SPEAKER_00: it's
48:16
SPEAKER_00: really,
48:16
SPEAKER_00: really
48:17
SPEAKER_00: important,
48:18
SPEAKER_00: especially
48:19
SPEAKER_00: being
48:19
SPEAKER_00: someone
48:20
SPEAKER_00: who
48:20
SPEAKER_00: came
48:20
SPEAKER_00: out
48:20
SPEAKER_00: of
48:20
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
48:21
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
48:22
SPEAKER_00: Um,
48:23
SPEAKER_00: because
48:24
SPEAKER_00: I
48:24
SPEAKER_00: did
48:25
SPEAKER_00: not
48:25
SPEAKER_00: question
48:26
SPEAKER_00: other
48:26
SPEAKER_00: people
48:26
SPEAKER_00: enough.
48:27
SPEAKER_00: I
48:27
SPEAKER_00: always
48:27
SPEAKER_00: self-blamed.
48:28
SPEAKER_00: And
48:28
SPEAKER_00: self-inquiry
48:29
SPEAKER_00: is
48:30
SPEAKER_00: not
48:30
SPEAKER_00: the
48:30
SPEAKER_00: same
48:30
SPEAKER_00: thing
48:30
SPEAKER_00: as
48:30
SPEAKER_00: self-blaming.
48:31
SPEAKER_00: So
48:31
SPEAKER_00: we'll
48:32
SPEAKER_00: talk
48:32
SPEAKER_00: about
48:32
SPEAKER_00: that
48:32
SPEAKER_00: on
48:32
SPEAKER_00: another
48:33
SPEAKER_00: episode.
48:33
SPEAKER_00: But
48:34
SPEAKER_00: for
48:34
SPEAKER_00: today,
48:34
SPEAKER_00: I
48:34
SPEAKER_00: feel
48:34
SPEAKER_00: like
48:35
SPEAKER_00: this
48:35
SPEAKER_00: is
48:35
SPEAKER_00: a
48:35
SPEAKER_00: good
48:35
SPEAKER_00: stopping
48:36
SPEAKER_00: point.
48:37
SPEAKER_00: And
48:37
SPEAKER_00: um,
48:38
SPEAKER_00: I'd
48:38
SPEAKER_00: like
48:39
SPEAKER_00: to
48:39
SPEAKER_00: know
48:40
SPEAKER_00: like
48:40
SPEAKER_00: what
48:40
SPEAKER_00: kind
48:41
SPEAKER_00: of
48:41
SPEAKER_00: somatic
48:42
SPEAKER_00: experiences,
48:43
SPEAKER_00: and
48:43
SPEAKER_00: when
48:43
SPEAKER_00: I
48:43
SPEAKER_00: say
48:43
SPEAKER_00: somatic,
48:44
SPEAKER_00: that's
48:44
SPEAKER_00: like
48:44
SPEAKER_00: in
48:44
SPEAKER_00: the
48:45
SPEAKER_00: body,
48:45
SPEAKER_00: um,
48:46
SPEAKER_00: you
48:46
SPEAKER_00: experience
48:47
SPEAKER_00: that
48:47
SPEAKER_00: maybe
48:47
SPEAKER_00: you
48:48
SPEAKER_00: haven't
48:48
SPEAKER_00: been
48:48
SPEAKER_00: able
48:49
SPEAKER_00: to
48:49
SPEAKER_00: resolve.
48:50
SPEAKER_00: And
48:51
SPEAKER_00: have
48:51
SPEAKER_00: you
48:52
SPEAKER_00: sought
48:52
SPEAKER_00: like
48:53
SPEAKER_00: solutions
48:54
SPEAKER_00: and
48:54
SPEAKER_00: haven't
48:55
SPEAKER_00: been
48:55
SPEAKER_00: able
48:55
SPEAKER_00: to
48:55
SPEAKER_00: figure
48:56
SPEAKER_00: it
48:56
SPEAKER_00: out,
48:56
SPEAKER_00: but
48:56
SPEAKER_00: you
48:56
SPEAKER_00: know
48:57
SPEAKER_00: there's
48:57
SPEAKER_00: something
48:58
SPEAKER_00: out
48:58
SPEAKER_00: there
48:58
SPEAKER_00: that
48:58
SPEAKER_00: you
48:59
SPEAKER_00: just
48:59
SPEAKER_00: can't
48:59
SPEAKER_00: quite
48:59
SPEAKER_00: put
48:59
SPEAKER_00: your
49:00
SPEAKER_00: finger
49:00
SPEAKER_00: on
49:00
SPEAKER_00: it.
49:01
SPEAKER_00: Now
49:01
SPEAKER_00: it
49:01
SPEAKER_00: might
49:02
SPEAKER_00: be
49:02
SPEAKER_00: like,
49:02
SPEAKER_00: you
49:02
SPEAKER_00: know,
49:02
SPEAKER_00: trying
49:03
SPEAKER_00: to
49:03
SPEAKER_00: lose
49:03
SPEAKER_00: weight
49:04
SPEAKER_00: and
49:04
SPEAKER_00: and
49:04
SPEAKER_00: you're
49:04
SPEAKER_00: chasing
49:05
SPEAKER_00: symptoms.
49:05
SPEAKER_00: It
49:05
SPEAKER_00: could
49:06
SPEAKER_00: be
49:06
SPEAKER_00: menopause
49:06
SPEAKER_00: or
49:07
SPEAKER_00: perimenopause,
49:08
SPEAKER_00: because
49:08
SPEAKER_00: I'm
49:08
SPEAKER_00: gonna
49:08
SPEAKER_00: tell
49:08
SPEAKER_00: you
49:08
SPEAKER_00: right
49:09
SPEAKER_00: now,
49:09
SPEAKER_00: I
49:09
SPEAKER_00: did
49:09
SPEAKER_00: not
49:10
SPEAKER_00: have
49:10
SPEAKER_00: menopause
49:10
SPEAKER_00: or
49:11
SPEAKER_00: perimenopause,
49:12
SPEAKER_00: and
49:12
SPEAKER_00: I'm
49:12
SPEAKER_00: pretty
49:12
SPEAKER_00: sure
49:13
SPEAKER_00: it's
49:13
SPEAKER_00: because
49:14
SPEAKER_00: I
49:14
SPEAKER_00: went
49:15
SPEAKER_00: through
49:15
SPEAKER_00: the
49:16
SPEAKER_00: process
49:17
SPEAKER_00: of
49:18
SPEAKER_00: healing
49:19
SPEAKER_00: my
49:19
SPEAKER_00: energy,
49:20
SPEAKER_00: my
49:20
SPEAKER_00: body,
49:21
SPEAKER_00: my
49:21
SPEAKER_00: mind,
49:21
SPEAKER_00: and
49:22
SPEAKER_00: my
49:22
SPEAKER_00: emotional
49:23
SPEAKER_00: state.
49:24
SPEAKER_00: And
49:24
SPEAKER_00: I
49:24
SPEAKER_00: believe
49:25
SPEAKER_00: I
49:25
SPEAKER_00: the
49:26
SPEAKER_00: releasing
49:26
SPEAKER_00: of
49:26
SPEAKER_00: my
49:27
SPEAKER_00: baggage
49:28
SPEAKER_00: is
49:28
SPEAKER_00: why
49:28
SPEAKER_00: I
49:28
SPEAKER_00: didn't
49:29
SPEAKER_00: experience
49:30
SPEAKER_00: menopause
49:30
SPEAKER_00: the
49:31
SPEAKER_00: way
49:31
SPEAKER_00: that
49:31
SPEAKER_00: other
49:31
SPEAKER_00: people
49:31
SPEAKER_00: are
49:32
SPEAKER_00: saying
49:32
SPEAKER_00: they're
49:32
SPEAKER_00: experiencing
49:33
SPEAKER_00: now.
49:34
SPEAKER_00: And
49:34
SPEAKER_00: I'm
49:34
SPEAKER_00: also
49:34
SPEAKER_00: sure
49:34
SPEAKER_00: that's
49:35
SPEAKER_00: why
49:35
SPEAKER_00: my
49:35
SPEAKER_00: body,
49:36
SPEAKER_00: you
49:36
SPEAKER_00: know,
49:36
SPEAKER_00: healed
49:37
SPEAKER_00: the
49:37
SPEAKER_00: IBS
49:38
SPEAKER_00: and
49:39
SPEAKER_00: why
49:39
SPEAKER_00: a
49:39
SPEAKER_00: lot
49:40
SPEAKER_00: of
49:40
SPEAKER_00: the
49:40
SPEAKER_00: chronic
49:40
SPEAKER_00: pain
49:40
SPEAKER_00: that
49:41
SPEAKER_00: I
49:41
SPEAKER_00: used
49:41
SPEAKER_00: to
49:41
SPEAKER_00: have
49:42
SPEAKER_00: has
49:42
SPEAKER_00: also
49:42
SPEAKER_00: resolved
49:43
SPEAKER_00: itself.
49:44
SPEAKER_00: So
49:44
SPEAKER_00: if
49:45
SPEAKER_00: you're
49:45
SPEAKER_00: interested
49:45
SPEAKER_00: in
49:46
SPEAKER_00: learning
49:46
SPEAKER_00: more,
49:46
SPEAKER_00: uh,
49:46
SPEAKER_00: what
49:46
SPEAKER_00: I'm
49:47
SPEAKER_00: gonna
49:47
SPEAKER_00: do
49:47
SPEAKER_00: is
49:47
SPEAKER_00: I'm
49:47
SPEAKER_00: gonna
49:48
SPEAKER_00: put
49:48
SPEAKER_00: a
49:48
SPEAKER_00: link
49:48
SPEAKER_00: below
49:49
SPEAKER_00: into
49:50
SPEAKER_00: a
49:50
SPEAKER_00: free
49:51
SPEAKER_00: clearing
49:51
SPEAKER_00: loop.
49:51
SPEAKER_00: It's
49:52
SPEAKER_00: the
49:52
SPEAKER_00: trauma
49:52
SPEAKER_00: bond
49:53
SPEAKER_00: clearing
49:53
SPEAKER_00: loop,
49:54
SPEAKER_00: and
49:54
SPEAKER_00: it
49:54
SPEAKER_00: basically
49:55
SPEAKER_00: clears
49:56
SPEAKER_00: your
49:57
SPEAKER_00: um
49:57
SPEAKER_00: unconscious
49:58
SPEAKER_00: mind
49:59
SPEAKER_00: of
49:59
SPEAKER_00: all
49:59
SPEAKER_00: trauma
50:00
SPEAKER_00: bonds
50:00
SPEAKER_00: from
50:01
SPEAKER_00: the
50:01
SPEAKER_00: past.
50:01
SPEAKER_00: Now,
50:01
SPEAKER_00: it
50:02
SPEAKER_00: could
50:02
SPEAKER_00: even
50:02
SPEAKER_00: be
50:02
SPEAKER_00: a
50:02
SPEAKER_00: past
50:02
SPEAKER_00: lifetime,
50:03
SPEAKER_00: you
50:03
SPEAKER_00: never
50:03
SPEAKER_00: know.
50:04
SPEAKER_00: Um,
50:04
SPEAKER_00: it's
50:04
SPEAKER_00: in
50:05
SPEAKER_00: there.
50:05
SPEAKER_00: So
50:05
SPEAKER_00: I'm
50:05
SPEAKER_00: gonna
50:05
SPEAKER_00: put
50:06
SPEAKER_00: a
50:06
SPEAKER_00: link
50:06
SPEAKER_00: down.
50:06
SPEAKER_00: You
50:06
SPEAKER_00: can
50:06
SPEAKER_00: just
50:07
SPEAKER_00: sign
50:07
SPEAKER_00: up
50:07
SPEAKER_00: for
50:07
SPEAKER_00: it,
50:07
SPEAKER_00: and
50:07
SPEAKER_00: then
50:07
SPEAKER_00: you'll
50:08
SPEAKER_00: get
50:08
SPEAKER_00: um
50:09
SPEAKER_00: a
50:09
SPEAKER_00: little
50:09
SPEAKER_00: mini
50:10
SPEAKER_00: course
50:10
SPEAKER_00: on
50:10
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
50:11
SPEAKER_00: abuse
50:11
SPEAKER_00: recovery.
50:12
SPEAKER_00: Um,
50:13
SPEAKER_00: but
50:13
SPEAKER_00: then
50:14
SPEAKER_00: the
50:14
SPEAKER_00: just
50:14
SPEAKER_00: the
50:14
SPEAKER_00: trauma
50:15
SPEAKER_00: bond
50:16
SPEAKER_00: is
50:16
SPEAKER_00: the
50:16
SPEAKER_00: thing
50:16
SPEAKER_00: that
50:16
SPEAKER_00: you're
50:17
SPEAKER_00: gonna
50:17
SPEAKER_00: want
50:17
SPEAKER_00: to
50:17
SPEAKER_00: listen
50:17
SPEAKER_00: to.
50:18
SPEAKER_00: So
50:18
SPEAKER_00: I
50:19
SPEAKER_00: listen
50:19
SPEAKER_00: to
50:19
SPEAKER_00: it
50:20
SPEAKER_00: at
50:20
SPEAKER_00: night.
50:20
SPEAKER_00: It
50:21
SPEAKER_00: helps
50:21
SPEAKER_00: untangle
50:22
SPEAKER_00: the
50:22
SPEAKER_00: unconscious
50:24
SPEAKER_00: programming
50:25
SPEAKER_00: that
50:25
SPEAKER_00: is
50:25
SPEAKER_00: installed
50:26
SPEAKER_00: during
50:26
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
50:27
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
50:27
SPEAKER_00: Now,
50:28
SPEAKER_00: this
50:28
SPEAKER_00: is
50:28
SPEAKER_00: going
50:28
SPEAKER_00: to
50:29
SPEAKER_00: work
50:29
SPEAKER_00: for
50:29
SPEAKER_00: you
50:29
SPEAKER_00: if
50:29
SPEAKER_00: you
50:29
SPEAKER_00: were
50:30
SPEAKER_00: in
50:30
SPEAKER_00: a
50:30
SPEAKER_00: cult,
50:31
SPEAKER_00: if
50:31
SPEAKER_00: you
50:32
SPEAKER_00: were
50:32
SPEAKER_00: in
50:32
SPEAKER_00: a
50:33
SPEAKER_00: community
50:34
SPEAKER_00: that
50:34
SPEAKER_00: had
50:34
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
50:35
SPEAKER_00: abuse,
50:36
SPEAKER_00: this
50:36
SPEAKER_00: is
50:36
SPEAKER_00: gonna
50:36
SPEAKER_00: work
50:37
SPEAKER_00: if
50:37
SPEAKER_00: you
50:37
SPEAKER_00: were
50:38
SPEAKER_00: in
50:38
SPEAKER_00: a
50:38
SPEAKER_00: um
50:39
SPEAKER_00: work
50:40
SPEAKER_00: or
50:40
SPEAKER_00: school
50:40
SPEAKER_00: environment
50:41
SPEAKER_00: that
50:41
SPEAKER_00: had
50:42
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
50:42
SPEAKER_00: abuse.
50:43
SPEAKER_00: Um,
50:44
SPEAKER_00: the
50:44
SPEAKER_00: PTA,
50:45
SPEAKER_00: I'm
50:45
SPEAKER_00: just
50:45
SPEAKER_00: saying.
50:46
SPEAKER_00: Um,
50:47
SPEAKER_00: if
50:47
SPEAKER_00: you
50:47
SPEAKER_00: were
50:48
SPEAKER_00: in
50:48
SPEAKER_00: um,
50:49
SPEAKER_00: you
50:50
SPEAKER_00: know,
50:50
SPEAKER_00: uh
50:50
SPEAKER_00: just
50:51
SPEAKER_00: a
50:51
SPEAKER_00: friend
50:51
SPEAKER_00: group
50:52
SPEAKER_00: where
50:52
SPEAKER_00: you
50:52
SPEAKER_00: were
50:52
SPEAKER_00: targeted
50:53
SPEAKER_00: and
50:53
SPEAKER_00: you
50:54
SPEAKER_00: maybe
50:54
SPEAKER_00: didn't
50:55
SPEAKER_00: know,
50:55
SPEAKER_00: um,
50:55
SPEAKER_00: it
50:56
SPEAKER_00: could
50:56
SPEAKER_00: also
50:57
SPEAKER_00: be
50:57
SPEAKER_00: from
50:58
SPEAKER_00: loved
50:58
SPEAKER_00: ones
50:59
SPEAKER_00: like
50:59
SPEAKER_00: a
50:59
SPEAKER_00: parent.
51:00
SPEAKER_00: You
51:00
SPEAKER_00: don't
51:01
SPEAKER_00: have
51:01
SPEAKER_00: to
51:02
SPEAKER_00: know
51:02
SPEAKER_00: who
51:02
SPEAKER_00: it
51:03
SPEAKER_00: was
51:03
SPEAKER_00: for
51:03
SPEAKER_00: the
51:04
SPEAKER_00: energetic
51:04
SPEAKER_00: imprint
51:05
SPEAKER_00: to
51:05
SPEAKER_00: have
51:05
SPEAKER_00: been
51:06
SPEAKER_00: to
51:06
SPEAKER_00: have
51:06
SPEAKER_00: impacted
51:07
SPEAKER_00: you.
51:07
SPEAKER_00: I've
51:08
SPEAKER_00: had
51:08
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
51:09
SPEAKER_00: clients
51:10
SPEAKER_00: that
51:10
SPEAKER_00: I
51:10
SPEAKER_00: had
51:11
SPEAKER_00: to
51:11
SPEAKER_00: remove
51:12
SPEAKER_00: from
51:12
SPEAKER_00: my
51:13
SPEAKER_00: care
51:13
SPEAKER_00: because
51:14
SPEAKER_00: they
51:14
SPEAKER_00: were
51:14
SPEAKER_00: so
51:15
SPEAKER_00: abusive
51:15
SPEAKER_00: and
51:15
SPEAKER_00: I
51:15
SPEAKER_00: couldn't
51:16
SPEAKER_00: see
51:16
SPEAKER_00: it
51:16
SPEAKER_00: at
51:16
SPEAKER_00: the
51:17
SPEAKER_00: time.
51:17
SPEAKER_00: So
51:18
SPEAKER_00: there's
51:19
SPEAKER_00: there
51:19
SPEAKER_00: is
51:19
SPEAKER_00: a
51:20
SPEAKER_00: tangled
51:21
SPEAKER_00: web
51:21
SPEAKER_00: of
51:23
SPEAKER_00: very,
51:24
SPEAKER_00: you
51:24
SPEAKER_00: know,
51:24
SPEAKER_00: tactical
51:25
SPEAKER_00: narcissistic
51:26
SPEAKER_00: people
51:26
SPEAKER_00: out
51:27
SPEAKER_00: there.
51:27
SPEAKER_00: So
51:28
SPEAKER_00: you
51:28
SPEAKER_00: might
51:28
SPEAKER_00: not
51:29
SPEAKER_00: even
51:29
SPEAKER_00: know
51:29
SPEAKER_00: you
51:29
SPEAKER_00: have
51:29
SPEAKER_00: one,
51:30
SPEAKER_00: but
51:30
SPEAKER_00: maybe
51:30
SPEAKER_00: some
51:30
SPEAKER_00: of
51:30
SPEAKER_00: these
51:31
SPEAKER_00: symptoms
51:32
SPEAKER_00: resonate
51:32
SPEAKER_00: with
51:33
SPEAKER_00: you.
51:33
SPEAKER_00: So,
51:34
SPEAKER_00: like
51:34
SPEAKER_00: I
51:34
SPEAKER_00: said,
51:35
SPEAKER_00: you
51:35
SPEAKER_00: don't
51:35
SPEAKER_00: have
51:35
SPEAKER_00: to
51:35
SPEAKER_00: know
51:35
SPEAKER_00: who
51:36
SPEAKER_00: it
51:36
SPEAKER_00: is,
51:36
SPEAKER_00: you
51:36
SPEAKER_00: don't
51:36
SPEAKER_00: have
51:36
SPEAKER_00: to
51:37
SPEAKER_00: know
51:37
SPEAKER_00: where
51:37
SPEAKER_00: it
51:37
SPEAKER_00: came
51:37
SPEAKER_00: from.
51:38
SPEAKER_00: The
51:38
SPEAKER_00: trauma
51:38
SPEAKER_00: bond
51:39
SPEAKER_00: will
51:39
SPEAKER_00: break
51:39
SPEAKER_00: it
51:40
SPEAKER_00: using
51:40
SPEAKER_00: the
51:40
SPEAKER_00: superconscious
51:41
SPEAKER_00: recode
51:42
SPEAKER_00: and
51:42
SPEAKER_00: clearing
51:43
SPEAKER_00: loops,
51:44
SPEAKER_00: um,
51:45
SPEAKER_00: which
51:45
SPEAKER_00: help
51:46
SPEAKER_00: restore
51:47
SPEAKER_00: your
51:47
SPEAKER_00: true
51:48
SPEAKER_00: higher
51:48
SPEAKER_00: self
51:49
SPEAKER_00: as
51:49
SPEAKER_00: the
51:49
SPEAKER_00: authority
51:50
SPEAKER_00: of
51:50
SPEAKER_00: your
51:50
SPEAKER_00: mind.
51:51
SPEAKER_00: And
51:52
SPEAKER_00: that
51:52
SPEAKER_00: is
51:52
SPEAKER_00: what
51:52
SPEAKER_00: I
51:52
SPEAKER_00: want
51:53
SPEAKER_00: for
51:53
SPEAKER_00: people,
51:53
SPEAKER_00: and
51:53
SPEAKER_00: that's
51:54
SPEAKER_00: what
51:54
SPEAKER_00: I
51:54
SPEAKER_00: want
51:54
SPEAKER_00: for
51:54
SPEAKER_00: the
51:54
SPEAKER_00: planet.
51:55
SPEAKER_00: Uh,
51:55
SPEAKER_00: because
51:56
SPEAKER_00: when
51:56
SPEAKER_00: you're
51:56
SPEAKER_00: in
51:56
SPEAKER_00: alignment
51:57
SPEAKER_00: with
51:57
SPEAKER_00: your
51:57
SPEAKER_00: higher
51:57
SPEAKER_00: self,
51:59
SPEAKER_00: you
51:59
SPEAKER_00: heal
51:59
SPEAKER_00: faster,
52:00
SPEAKER_00: you
52:00
SPEAKER_00: create
52:01
SPEAKER_00: faster,
52:01
SPEAKER_00: and
52:01
SPEAKER_00: you
52:02
SPEAKER_00: get
52:02
SPEAKER_00: back
52:02
SPEAKER_00: to
52:02
SPEAKER_00: creating
52:03
SPEAKER_00: what
52:03
SPEAKER_00: your
52:03
SPEAKER_00: soul
52:03
SPEAKER_00: came
52:03
SPEAKER_00: here
52:04
SPEAKER_00: to
52:04
SPEAKER_00: create
52:04
SPEAKER_00: instead
52:05
SPEAKER_00: of
52:05
SPEAKER_00: getting
52:06
SPEAKER_00: lost
52:06
SPEAKER_00: in
52:07
SPEAKER_00: uh
52:07
SPEAKER_00: trauma
52:08
SPEAKER_00: and
52:09
SPEAKER_00: comfort
52:10
SPEAKER_00: and
52:10
SPEAKER_00: illusions
52:11
SPEAKER_00: that
52:11
SPEAKER_00: are
52:11
SPEAKER_00: not
52:12
SPEAKER_00: supporting
52:12
SPEAKER_00: you.