Latest / Questionable Detour / Lifting 900 hamsters, Highway fatalities by a dog driving a car, and pulling objects from your underwear

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Lifting 900 hamsters, Highway fatalities by a dog driving a car, and pulling objects from your underwear · Questionable Detour

• 0:00
  Excuse me, what is going on here?
• 0:04
  But first we're gonna make a little detour.
• 0:09
  So absurd, so questionable.
• 0:12
  Yeah, I guess we're just the weirdos.
• 0:15
  Expect the detour.
• 0:25
  What's too much underwear? Like before, like what's too little underwear?
• 0:28
  So not a, not a quantity of how many pairs of underwear are too much for you to wear.
• 0:33
  Quantities too, you can answer that question.
• 0:35
  But like, we have such specific types of underwear.
• 0:39
  And all of them are relatively sociable acceptable.
• 0:42
  Where does it stop?
• 0:43
  I think the, the fast food bag is probably where it stops.
• 0:47
  I don't, I think everybody can agree that that one's frowned upon.
• 0:52
  Don't use that.
• 0:53
  Do you have like the extra fries in there?
• 0:55
  Or keep them warm?
• 0:57
  Yeah.
• 0:59
  Imagine, imagine, just like, man, I am famished.
• 1:03
  And you go dig it, rooting around like a truffle pig.
• 1:07
  And you pull out a fry.
• 1:08
  Get you a tank fry.
• 1:10
  Pop that bad boy in.
• 1:12
  Oh man.
• 1:14
  Someone's like, I'm, I'm hungry.
• 1:16
  I haven't eaten.
• 1:17
  And then they just see you searching for gold and you give them a fry.
• 1:21
  Like what's their reaction to that?
• 1:23
  Nobody's like wants you to pull fries out of your, or any food really out of your underwear.
• 1:29
  It's not limited to fries.
• 1:30
  I think you, you see somebody digging and it goes straight to your mouth.
• 1:33
  Your immediate thought is disgust.
• 1:34
  You're probably not thinking, oh, that's a fry.
• 1:36
  That's a, that's a secondary thought.
• 1:39
  Once you realize what's going on.
• 1:41
  The thing is too, how are you ensuring that the fries aren't falling out?
• 1:45
  Cause you could just be leaving a handle and Gretel trail like back to your house.
• 1:50
  So I can just like picking up breadcrumbs and find you.
• 1:53
  That's the only thing preventing you from having fries in your underpants is a
• 1:57
  possibility that somebody could track you.
• 1:59
  Yeah.
• 1:59
  I like to keep a certain level of stealth about me.
• 2:03
  And the crunching of the bag as you move your legs and the frot, your taint fries
• 2:08
  falling out is too much.
• 2:10
  Isn't that stealthy enough?
• 2:11
  Evan's worried about a cartoon detective following him around.
• 2:15
  With a double-sided hat.
• 2:16
  And the, uh, the big magnifying glass.
• 2:19
  Like why does he need a magnifying glass of fries?
• 2:21
  Aren't microscopic, you know, like they're probably, you get to look at them.
• 2:25
  He's just a detective with bad eyesight at that point.
• 2:27
  What's the second weirdest thing if we're, we'll say, okay, fries, number one
• 2:33
  weirdest thing to pull out of your underpants, right?
• 2:35
  Just in public.
• 2:37
  What's the second weird?
• 2:37
  I mean, other than your genitals, that, that should be number one.
• 2:40
  I let me go back.
• 2:42
  There's an asterisk there.
• 2:43
  Let me go back.
• 2:43
  It's, it's just, yeah.
• 2:45
  Obviously that's number one.
• 2:46
  So fries are number two.
• 2:47
  What's number three?
• 2:48
  Like what's the third weirdest thing that you're like, ah, I just pulled this out of his pants.
• 2:53
  And I guess we're excluding prison rules, right?
• 2:56
  Cause prison's a different game and that storage, you know,
• 3:02
  So in prison, somebody pull out like, you know, a key fob to a Toyota Corolla.
• 3:06
  And you're like, yeah, obviously that would be in there.
• 3:10
  Yeah.
• 3:12
  That's where his cubby is.
• 3:13
  That's just where he stores his things.
• 3:15
  If you're in prison, it's like a kangaroo.
• 3:17
  It's much more normal, I think for somebody to probably carry things in their underwear in prison,
• 3:23
  then it would be out and about.
• 3:25
  Okay.
• 3:25
  Well then let's, let's exclude prison rules.
• 3:27
  Then I didn't realize those are had such an impact on this discussion.
• 3:31
  Astric to Astric now.
• 3:33
  Okay.
• 3:33
  So yeah, yeah.
• 3:34
  Number one, Astric next to general's number one thing.
• 3:36
  You can't pull that out in public and then prison rules.
• 3:38
  Yeah.
• 3:39
  Okay.
• 3:39
  Okay.
• 3:40
  I'm glad we said the prayer.
• 3:41
  The parameters to this discussion.
• 3:43
  Then what's the third thing?
• 3:44
  Like what's the next weirdest thing?
• 3:46
  I think a hedgehog.
• 3:47
  I think that honestly, that would be a very weird thing to kind of pull out of your pants to be like,
• 3:52
  Hey, I found this.
• 3:56
  Like you were confused.
• 3:56
  Like you didn't put it there.
• 3:58
  You just found it there.
• 3:59
  Like Alan, why are you walking like that?
• 4:02
  And you're like, hold on, let me investigate.
• 4:05
  But you get the guy, you get the cartoon investigator to come investigate for you.
• 4:09
  You know, root around there with a magnifying glass.
• 4:13
  And he's like, Oh, there's a hedgehog in here.
• 4:14
  That would be weird.
• 4:15
  You're looking at uncomfortable, but also very much alive.
• 4:20
  So a lot of movement.
• 4:22
  Weird on two levels there.
• 4:23
  I would think it would be something like a portable fan.
• 4:26
  You would get an amusement park because you pull it out.
• 4:28
  Yeah.
• 4:29
  What was it doing down there in the first place?
• 4:32
  Second of all, when you turn that on, you're just blowing your crotch fumes into your face.
• 4:36
  Let's see.
• 4:37
  It's a July day here in the South.
• 4:39
  I mean, if you've got a portable fan down there, you're probably thinking smart.
• 4:43
  Yeah.
• 4:43
  Yeah.
• 4:43
  But to immediately go to your face and be like, maybe you're blowing some loose hairs
• 4:48
  in your face.
• 4:49
  Oh, some sweat that got on it.
• 4:52
  You know, thanks.
• 4:54
  Is that what we're happy with?
• 4:55
  I mean, we're okay with it.
• 4:57
  It's weird, but it is the weirdest.
• 4:59
  No, I think we were saying taint fries were definitely number one.
• 5:02
  Yeah.
• 5:02
  Where we go hedgehog versus pet.
• 5:05
  We go hedgehog versus portable fan.
• 5:07
  I do say it's weird to have any animal in your pants.
• 5:11
  I don't think it's specific to hedgehogs, but also weird to have machinery in your pants.
• 5:15
  Another layer with the hedgehog is when you're saying, I got that hog in my pants.
• 5:23
  There's going to be confusion as to which one you're talking about.
• 5:25
  Yeah.
• 5:26
  Yeah.
• 5:26
  Yeah.
• 5:26
  So, but what if you're like a famous pop star and you're like, I have fans in my pants all the time.
• 5:33
  Oh, yeah.
• 5:34
  Okay.
• 5:34
  Then you just look like a common street whore.
• 5:39
  You say that like an old Baptist pastor, like just any woman that wears leggings.
• 5:45
  What about some fireworks?
• 5:47
  Just like a roaming candle.
• 5:51
  Like a whole sleeve of firecrackers.
• 5:53
  Yeah.
• 5:54
  Those little balls that just pop when you throw them on the ground.
• 5:56
  You never know when it's going to go off.
• 5:59
  I mean, that would be kind of a crazy situation.
• 6:01
  You see somebody rooting around in their nether regions and they just pull out one of those
• 6:06
  little pop balls and throw it on the ground like a magician.
• 6:11
  You just get like a Roman candle out and just start spraying into people's chests, you know,
• 6:17
  as it whizzes by their face.
• 6:19
  They're like, oh, that's not the weirdest thing.
• 6:20
  This is violent.
• 6:21
  Yeah.
• 6:22
  That's that.
• 6:23
  That is the equivalent of being like, what if you took out a switchblade knife and just stab somebody?
• 6:28
  What's weirder in that situation?
• 6:30
  You think stabbing is the equivalent of light harassment?
• 6:34
  I think I'm just saying, I can just say the weirdest part is that the pants,
• 6:39
  the weirdest part is the violence.
• 6:41
  When they when they take a knife out, they've got one thing in mind.
• 6:44
  They're they're going to to inflict pain.
• 6:47
  They're not going to like cut an apple or something like there's nothing shocking
• 6:50
  about them stabbing somebody.
• 6:51
  What a twist though, is they pull out a knife.
• 6:54
  You think they're about to stab you.
• 6:56
  They go back in.
• 6:57
  They go back into the pants.
• 6:58
  Pull out an apple.
• 6:59
  Yikes.
• 6:59
  And they're eating off a taint blade.
• 7:03
  I think at that point, would you call that a circumcising the apple?
• 7:07
  If you pulled it from your pants?
• 7:08
  Yeah, I think so.
• 7:10
  That's fair.
• 7:11
  You know, I don't I don't think it's any.
• 7:12
  I don't think it's.
• 7:13
  Have we also have we hit our taint quota of how many times we can use the word taint?
• 7:18
  Yeah.
• 7:18
  In one episode or is this total?
• 7:20
  I think I want to say our contract says per episode.
• 7:24
  Okay, good.
• 7:25
  Is that like we had to say it this many times?
• 7:27
  Yeah.
• 7:28
  Yeah.
• 7:29
  We've been falling woefully behind.
• 7:30
  We're catching up now, though.
• 7:32
  For sure.
• 7:32
  We're putting it all in one episode.
• 7:34
  We're really bag weigh in this.
• 7:36
  It's kind of an annual thing.
• 7:39
  So this is the taint episode.
• 7:42
  Welcome to Questions Will Detour.
• 7:44
  Let's do a hypothetical.
• 7:45
  Dave, can I pose a somewhat abstract, purely hypothetical question?
• 7:50
  I guess I want to apologize for asking a hypothetical question.
• 7:54
  Well, that's a hypothetical question.
• 7:56
  So they say dogs are man's best friends and people love their dogs almost or more so than
• 8:03
  their children.
• 8:04
  So when you hire a dog walker, you are putting your trust in somebody to take care of your
• 8:11
  four legged companion.
• 8:12
  And as the three most trustworthy people in the world, we are constantly, I mean,
• 8:18
  constantly getting people asking us, can you walk our dog?
• 8:22
  So what do y'all do as a professional, experienced dog walker?
• 8:28
  For me personally.
• 8:29
  Well, I asked you the question, so it's always you personally, Evan.
• 8:33
  You don't have to preface your questions with this.
• 8:36
  Me personally.
• 8:39
  And I don't want to speak for you guys.
• 8:40
  OK.
• 8:41
  Thank you.
• 8:41
  Thank you.
• 8:42
  This is just a me thing, but I'm sure you guys will agree.
• 8:46
  And I'm going to go ahead and speak for you guys and say you agree with me.
• 8:49
  OK.
• 8:49
  One thing we always preach on this podcast is efficiency.
• 8:54
  So that's kind of the name of the game when I get into dog walking.
• 8:57
  It's about what can the dogs do for me?
• 9:00
  Right.
• 9:01
  Is this efficiency or selfishness?
• 9:04
  Well, I don't want to waste my time in the day walking some dogs when I could be what,
• 9:10
  you know, peddling some bikes, bikes or black market jackets that I get from the local stores.
• 9:17
  You're taking people jacket right off of them, aren't you?
• 9:21
  Like you're just coming up behind people just yanking on it and just.
• 9:24
  I have a reputable business and I will not be undermined here today,
• 9:29
  but I want to get paid for it, of course.
• 9:30
  Yeah, I mean, yeah.
• 9:31
  So what I like to do is take the dogs back to my house and I use them as sort of a hamster wheel.
• 9:39
  I don't like to pay for electricity, so I like to have a dog running on the hamster
• 9:44
  wheel in my basement at all times to kind of just keep energy pumping through my house.
• 9:48
  They're not good at it, but if they don't do it, who will?
• 9:51
  Let me ask you this.
• 9:52
  How long were you a hamster wheel person to create electricity before you switch the dogs?
• 9:58
  So I assume you started out with the hamster, right?
• 10:00
  Like you were like you put a thousand little hamster wheels in your basement.
• 10:04
  See, that's a different way than where I was going.
• 10:06
  I thought Evan was the person on the wheel.
• 10:08
  Yeah, I was the person on the wheel for God's sake.
• 10:11
  OK, you can look at my calves.
• 10:13
  But you were holding hamster.
• 10:15
  See that you're holding hamsters, though.
• 10:18
  Like you're like, the hamster wheel.
• 10:20
  Yeah, they're like crawled over my back and on my shoulders and stuff.
• 10:22
  I just wanted the extra weight on there
• 10:25
  just to kind of keep the wheel pushing.
• 10:27
  You chose the weighty, the heaviest animal you could think of.
• 10:32
  I didn't want that much weight, just like that one or two pounds.
• 10:36
  It just really pushed me over the weight.
• 10:37
  One or two pound hamster.
• 10:39
  No, that's a big hamster.
• 10:41
  Yeah, multiple hamsters.
• 10:41
  Oh, OK, so like, OK, adding up.
• 10:43
  So it was about 16 hamsters on my back.
• 10:45
  I assume you just threw them in a trash bag and just kind of over your shoulder.
• 10:49
  It was a mesh bag and they kind of bounced around the whole time.
• 10:54
  They had fun.
• 10:54
  And you gauge this by how dead they were.
• 10:58
  How much they were squeaking the entire time.
• 11:00
  So anytime you hear a squeak, you think that that's something that thing is expressing joy?
• 11:06
  They wouldn't make the noise if they weren't happy.
• 11:08
  So if we open a door and the door squeaks,
• 11:11
  you think that door is enjoying being opened?
• 11:13
  Jubilant.
• 11:14
  It is doing what it's supposed to, you know.
• 11:15
  Fair enough.
• 11:16
  And according to Evan, hamsters are supposed to be thrown in a bag and then used as weights.
• 11:21
  Serving its purpose.
• 11:22
  Let me ask you this.
• 11:22
  In your basement, since you consider hamsters to be weights,
• 11:27
  do you have a whole home gym based around lifting hamsters?
• 11:30
  I do have a whole fitness routine that centralizes around hamster weight.
• 11:36
  And I've been trying to do squats lately.
• 11:38
  Sure. Yeah.
• 11:38
  I mean, really work on the tight.
• 11:41
  Yeah, just the gripping thighs that I have.
• 11:46
  The tight glutes.
• 11:51
  God, if you don't, they can't see right now.
• 11:52
  Evan's just standing up, squeezing his glutes.
• 11:56
  He's creating diamonds with the amount of pressure.
• 11:59
  He's got one leg on the ground, one on the table.
• 12:03
  It's absolute flexing.
• 12:05
  Oh, man, he's sweating too.
• 12:06
  I oiled up for this, boys.
• 12:09
  Yeah, we can tell.
• 12:12
  Don't disappoint.
• 12:14
  You didn't even open the door all the way.
• 12:15
  You just kind of squeeze through the crack.
• 12:19
  So you've been you've been working on your squats.
• 12:22
  Yeah. How do you do that with hamster weight?
• 12:24
  Well, you know, I've been squatting about close to three hundred these days.
• 12:29
  Three hundred hamsters or three hundred pounds?
• 12:31
  What's the difference?
• 12:32
  You know, what is the difference?
• 12:34
  Hey, the producer we have here that's total here.
• 12:37
  Look up how much a hamster weighs.
• 12:40
  Three point five to five point three ounces.
• 12:42
  Thank you.
• 12:43
  The producer that sounds exactly like Evan.
• 12:48
  So can you the producer that sounds exactly Evan,
• 12:51
  how many hamsters would it take to get three hundred pounds?
• 12:54
  Sixteen ounces and a pound.
• 12:55
  Sure. OK.
• 12:56
  You don't have to walk me through the math.
• 12:57
  You just.
• 12:57
  So that's three hamsters a pound.
• 12:59
  So that's and don't don't like try and correct us
• 13:03
  or try to prove us wrong on this math.
• 13:05
  It's 100 percent right.
• 13:06
  You don't have to go check it.
• 13:07
  This is an educational podcast.
• 13:09
  Professors want to talk board in here.
• 13:12
  A large hamster is five point three ounces.
• 13:16
  It's so solid.
• 13:17
  Sixteen ounces in a pound.
• 13:19
  So we're assuming three hamsters per pound.
• 13:24
  If we're talking three hundred pounds, that's nine hundred hamsters.
• 13:28
  It's like watching Goodwill Hunting.
• 13:30
  It's like the janitor that's just doing some crazy math.
• 13:33
  You and how many how many bushels is that?
• 13:38
  So right now, logistically for you to squat three hundred pounds with a hamster,
• 13:43
  so you would somehow have to contain nine hundred hamsters.
• 13:47
  Yes.
• 13:47
  How are you going about this logistically?
• 13:49
  You know, the rolling balls that hamsters have.
• 13:52
  Absolutely.
• 13:53
  Imagine that, but about five times the size.
• 13:56
  I put about four hundred and fifty hamsters in each one.
• 14:00
  I kind of let them roll through the house and just kind of get a feel for the ball.
• 14:03
  It's like the ball from Indiana Jones when he's running away from it.
• 14:07
  Yeah.
• 14:08
  Four hundred and fifty answers in a plastic ball.
• 14:11
  Yeah.
• 14:12
  I want them to get a feel for the ball so they can get comfortable.
• 14:14
  So when I start lifting, they don't get freaked out because they're not alive anymore.
• 14:19
  Listen, I don't want them to freak out.
• 14:21
  So eventually, you know, they roll themselves out
• 14:24
  and then I hook them on to the end of my bars and I start lifting.
• 14:28
  You just start squatting.
• 14:29
  Just start going to town.
• 14:32
  I say, hammies, look at these gluteus, you know?
• 14:37
  You're talking to your muscles with a hamster pun.
• 14:40
  Yeah.
• 14:40
  Now, you brought us a show and tell situation here.
• 14:43
  Go to put that dumbbell, the hamster dumbbell on the table.
• 14:46
  Go to do that for us.
• 14:48
  Wow. God, that's super heavy.
• 14:50
  Man, this right here in front of this is dumbbell is not a dumbbell attached
• 14:56
  to a couple of hamster balls and there's a piece of iron rod that has been sharpened
• 15:00
  on both ends and you've just just about about seven hamsters on each side.
• 15:05
  So explain.
• 15:08
  You got to get them on there somehow.
• 15:10
  They're quick, but you're quicker.
• 15:15
  Are you running around your house with just I assume loose hamsters?
• 15:19
  There's no way if you have as many hamsters as you do, they're not loose.
• 15:22
  You're just going around, just kind of like stabbing at the floor.
• 15:25
  It's about the ethics for the hamster.
• 15:27
  You're big on ethics as you as you skewer answers onto your barbell.
• 15:32
  I don't want these hamsters to be used for anything, you know,
• 15:38
  that they wouldn't want to be used for.
• 15:39
  Right, right, right.
• 15:41
  So I lift weight with their dead bodies and that's it.
• 15:46
  Big consent guy.
• 15:48
  Yeah.
• 15:48
  I asked each one of them.
• 15:51
  He lays on his floor on his belly with his legs kicked over, you know,
• 15:54
  like he's a girl talking on the phone.
• 15:56
  He's just got my finger to my chair.
• 15:58
  Yeah.
• 15:59
  And he just picks one up and was like, are you OK with this?
• 16:01
  And he goes, the next one, are you OK with this?
• 16:03
  We're having such a good time.
• 16:05
  It just goes from hamster on the right picks it up.
• 16:09
  Are you OK with this?
• 16:10
  The hamster obviously is not, but does not have the capabilities of speaking the language.
• 16:15
  It squeaks.
• 16:15
  It's happy.
• 16:16
  And then you just stick it on a skewer right to the left.
• 16:19
  Right.
• 16:19
  Is that how that works?
• 16:20
  Pretty much.
• 16:21
  Yeah.
• 16:21
  I don't know how I got here.
• 16:23
  I imagine your workouts are just like a montage, like an 80s montage.
• 16:27
  I assume it's like a Dolph Lundgren workout where he's just like, you're just shirt off.
• 16:33
  You don't look like Dolph Lundgren, so it's kind of gross.
• 16:36
  And like you're sweaty and you're just like lifting different things.
• 16:40
  And like you have a bunch of hamsters in a trash bag.
• 16:43
  Like if I pull you with those pulleys and it's just lifting the bag up over a bar
• 16:48
  over and over and you're just like listening to like 80s, like upbeat 80s music.
• 16:53
  What's Evan's workout song while he's doing this?
• 16:56
  I have the tiger, but every time the tiger, like that lyric comes up in the song,
• 17:02
  it's Evan that he has pre-recorded over that same hamsters.
• 17:05
  I record it.
• 17:06
  I distribute it.
• 17:09
  You wear many hats in the business industry.
• 17:12
  I've been saying it's economy has been tough.
• 17:14
  You got to find your footing somewhere from a dog walker.
• 17:17
  I thought to bring you back around to the dog walking was what was the original question.
• 17:25
  This is about dog walking for about three seconds.
• 17:27
  Yeah.
• 17:27
  I do want to say none of this is my fault.
• 17:31
  The amount of animal abuse that you've committed.
• 17:35
  Yeah.
• 17:35
  Starting to look a little dumber and I don't like it.
• 17:39
  Don't like the look of my past.
• 17:41
  Got to say doesn't reflect well in my dog walking business.
• 17:44
  Hey, here, we're not going to define you from your past.
• 17:47
  Only what you're becoming.
• 17:49
  Yeah.
• 17:49
  But my good work is a 10 to 15 lifer for animal abuse.
• 17:55
  Just doesn't look good for my dog walking business.
• 17:57
  I will say don't write the dog walking business.
• 18:00
  God, because I will be ruined in the dog walking space.
• 18:05
  Yeah.
• 18:05
  You're so well liked.
• 18:06
  All right, Alan, let's answer this question.
• 18:08
  I'd love to.
• 18:10
  How are you revolutionizing the dog walking industry?
• 18:14
  Yeah.
• 18:15
  So I'm in the dog walking industry, but to be honest with you, I'm pretty lazy.
• 18:19
  Sure.
• 18:20
  I'm looking for any way that I can do my job without actually doing it.
• 18:25
  So instead of dogs walking, I would rather put a dog behind the wheel of a car.
• 18:31
  And let it drive me.
• 18:35
  I think that's revolutionary.
• 18:36
  You're not underselling what dogs can do.
• 18:39
  Yeah, I think they've got the ability.
• 18:40
  I think they've just been pretending not to.
• 18:42
  Yeah.
• 18:43
  Yeah.
• 18:43
  Just so they don't have to.
• 18:44
  You take floofy, which we mentioned earlier, which is just a full blooded shih tzu.
• 18:50
  And then you take the Pontiac Sunfire.
• 18:53
  Yes.
• 18:54
  And you put that little dog in the front seat.
• 18:58
  I guess you just put the dog in the front seat.
• 19:00
  In the front seat, I guess you just want to put a brick on the gas pedal.
• 19:03
  I'm thinking that maybe you have one on the floorboard working the pedals.
• 19:07
  Oh, OK.
• 19:08
  Yeah.
• 19:08
  And then maybe another one or two, depending on sizes, working the wheel.
• 19:14
  That's it.
• 19:15
  So I know you've run a bunch of tests.
• 19:17
  You've done a bunch of clinical trials because you're a learned man.
• 19:22
  You don't do anything on a whim.
• 19:24
  So what have you seen in your research?
• 19:28
  You know, we've seen a lot of death.
• 19:29
  Um, and that's apart from the car accidents.
• 19:34
  Yeah.
• 19:35
  Yeah.
• 19:35
  We we have as we've been driving down the road, there's just the streets are littered
• 19:40
  with dead people.
• 19:42
  That's the death that we're seeing.
• 19:45
  Is it because we hit them?
• 19:46
  I don't I don't know.
• 19:47
  I'm in the back seat kind of doing my own thing.
• 19:51
  Well, I may be lazy, but I'm still responsible.
• 19:54
  And I've got a leash, you know, attached to these dogs as they're
• 20:00
  as they're driving the car.
• 20:01
  So I'm technically still walking the dog.
• 20:04
  It's just Alan in the back seat of a car.
• 20:06
  And that car is running side swiping a wall is just rough.
• 20:11
  He's just like bouncing around.
• 20:12
  It's like, man, this is so first socks.
• 20:17
  As he sees a lady go over the windshield and up the back.
• 20:21
  The last thing that lady sees while she's rolling on the ground behind the car is your
• 20:26
  I love my shit zoo sticker on the back.
• 20:30
  Yeah, she's going to think finally done it.
• 20:33
  The dogs are taking over.
• 20:34
  She's going to think this is a Planet of the Apes style thing, but just with dogs.
• 20:41
  She's probably ready to go.
• 20:42
  If that's what she thinks society's turned into, she didn't want to stick around.
• 20:45
  Yeah, she's like, God, I'm glad I'm about to hit my head.
• 20:47
  I hope one of these brittle bones punctures along.
• 20:55
  That has to be the most chaotic scene as you put somebody's boxer in the front seat
• 21:00
  of a PT Cruiser and they just back out right into somebody's house.
• 21:05
  Yeah, it doesn't always work.
• 21:07
  You just get the dog out and like, we got to find you another car.
• 21:09
  We just try again.
• 21:13
  And thankfully, what's cool about living in a neighborhood is that you're really never
• 21:16
  in any shortage of vehicles.
• 21:18
  That's true.
• 21:20
  Or families that you can ruin.
• 21:22
  Or families that you can ruin.
• 21:25
  One quick question for you.
• 21:27
  Are any of your dogs governmentally licensed drivers?
• 21:30
  Do you have their CDL?
• 21:32
  Oh, yeah.
• 21:33
  AT Wheeler.
• 21:34
  The long haulers.
• 21:35
  Yeah.
• 21:36
  Yeah.
• 21:36
  So we usually give big trucks to the big dogs.
• 21:41
  What is CDL?
• 21:41
  The same Bernards, you know.
• 21:43
  Portuguese water dog.
• 21:44
  What does CDL stand for in this context?
• 21:48
  Um, a cool dog license.
• 21:51
  There you go.
• 21:52
  Yeah.
• 21:52
  When you when you get your your cool dog license CDL, you get a collar that just says CDL on
• 21:58
  it and then a pair of sunglasses.
• 22:01
  Those are cool dogs is that 18 Wheeler hauling bricks tears through an intersection
• 22:08
  and just takes out about 27 cars.
• 22:13
  But it's like it's like anything that you do as long as you look cool doing it.
• 22:18
  Nobody's going to ask who's going to care.
• 22:20
  Think about that dog kind of arm hanging out the window of that truck.
• 22:25
  Marlboro, you know, red in between his paws.
• 22:29
  Cool as can be.
• 22:31
  As he T-bones a little old lady just trying to make it to goodwill.
• 22:40
  People are angry at him.
• 22:41
  He gets out and like he gets out of that car after he just destroys the old lady's car
• 22:46
  is a mangled mess.
• 22:48
  He gets out and people are like, you know what?
• 22:51
  Never mind.
• 22:52
  They kind of see the confidence that he walks with as he has that chain that goes from his
• 22:58
  his belt to his wallet.
• 23:00
  You know, like he's they see he's a cool guy.
• 23:02
  He's not wearing pants.
• 23:03
  He's dragging on the ground.
• 23:04
  He walks into the car and puts his cigarette out on the destroyed vehicle,
• 23:08
  but it lights up because gas is leaking.
• 23:11
  So now there's explosions.
• 23:14
  He has like a cool catchphrase when he walks off or when he views the accident, like a
• 23:19
  good boy's bad intentions.
• 23:25
  Oh, man.
• 23:26
  How about airplanes?
• 23:27
  Are you planning on putting canisters in the car?
• 23:32
  Are you planning on putting canines in control of airplanes and was your first test in 2001?
• 23:44
  We have not gotten dogs into the air yet.
• 23:47
  Those dogs back in one was not my responsibility.
• 23:52
  You can say they are dogs, though.
• 23:55
  They may have been.
• 23:55
  They probably were.
• 23:56
  I mean, it was a crash, you know, it wasn't successful or was it?
• 24:04
  It's all about relativity.
• 24:08
  Point is, that was not on me.
• 24:10
  I was in the second grade.
• 24:13
  So no no planes for you.
• 24:15
  No, not yet.
• 24:16
  Not yet.
• 24:16
  When you get air travel involved, it's a whole new ballgame.
• 24:20
  You got to kind of start hot air balloon.
• 24:22
  OK, yeah.
• 24:23
  You just you just send in dogs off into the atmosphere.
• 24:26
  Yeah, strap them to a weather balloon.
• 24:30
  I mean, NASA already kind of did that with just sending chimpanzees into space, right?
• 24:35
  Like they were they were ahead of the game there.
• 24:37
  Yeah, but they look kind of stupid doing it.
• 24:40
  We don't see any chimps driving cars.
• 24:43
  So apparently they failed.
• 24:44
  Whereas for you, you succeeded in dogs driving.
• 24:48
  I succeeded where the primates failed and I'm OK with that.
• 24:52
  Yeah, I think it's great.
• 24:53
  I think dog chauffeurs instead of dog walking is great.
• 24:57
  I think that's going to help out a lot of the elderly trying to get to their final resting place.
• 25:03
  Yeah, yeah, I mean, it'll send them on to old glory pretty quickly as that dog rolls the
• 25:11
  that Lincoln town car down Main Street and Mercury Marquis never saw it coming.
• 25:20
  That's good.
• 25:20
  Make them drive.
• 25:21
  Make them drive. Don't walk them.
• 25:23
  OK, well, here's here's me as the professional dog walker.
• 25:26
  I also don't want dogs to walk.
• 25:28
  I am also relatively lazy, not as lazy as you, but lazy.
• 25:33
  So I have hired my man Lewis, who is a Vietnam veteran, a Vietnam pilot.
• 25:44
  And me and me and Lewis are close because I let him I let him sleep.
• 25:47
  I let him sleep on an air mattress in my garage.
• 25:51
  The car's in there. He's really squished.
• 25:54
  He's really squished over to the left, but he doesn't have high standards because he has PTSD
• 25:59
  and he wakes up in a cold sweat most of the time.
• 26:02
  So what I have done is me and Lewis have devised a plan where I'll walk up to this
• 26:07
  upper middle class suburbian house and this old lady gives me this ugly little crusty white dog
• 26:15
  and I give her the pleasantries that you might think.
• 26:19
  I take the dog and I hook a very sturdy vest to it.
• 26:24
  She's like, excuse me, sir, why do you need this very sturdy vest?
• 26:29
  I say, ma'am, give me one second.
• 26:31
  And she starts hearing those Chinook helicopter blades coming above her house.
• 26:36
  And she looks off to the left and there's this hook just
• 26:41
  coming from the Chinook helicopter.
• 26:44
  He Lewis forgot to wheel it in.
• 26:47
  So it's just hanging and just banging off a light poles and off of people's cars
• 26:52
  going through people's roofs.
• 26:54
  But but I I eventually catch this Chinook hook and I hook it to this dog.
• 27:02
  And then Lewis takes off with this dog just hanging from this helicopter.
• 27:08
  Sometimes he gets high enough.
• 27:09
  Other times he kind of misjudges how low he is.
• 27:13
  And this dog, sometimes the dog becomes like a wrecking ball.
• 27:21
  As we send a boxer through somebody's front window, toppling trash cans.
• 27:29
  You had to topple trash cans and it was trash day.
• 27:32
  It's always trash day.
• 27:37
  And and we just go to each client that we have.
• 27:41
  And I go to the next house on down the road.
• 27:44
  Here comes Lewis and that 1960s Chinook with an already dog just hanging off and freaked out.
• 27:49
  Dogs freaked out. Lewis is freaked out.
• 27:51
  He didn't know what he was getting into.
• 27:52
  I then hooked the next dog a little bit bigger lab to the helicopter.
• 27:57
  Lewis takes off a few few dogs down.
• 28:02
  You know, we've got five or six dogs on that hook.
• 28:05
  The final house, I put the final dog on and I stand on the edge of the hook
• 28:09
  and I just get lifted off like Mary Poppins often to the sunset over the horizon with these dogs.
• 28:18
  You and a bunch of dead dogs.
• 28:20
  A bunch of battered dogs.
• 28:27
  They're not all dead.
• 28:28
  No, no.
• 28:29
  The first couple are.
• 28:30
  He had to gauge the distance.
• 28:32
  But by the third one, he had figured it out.
• 28:35
  Right.
• 28:35
  Like he had gotten higher and he got higher than the roofs.
• 28:38
  Now, Lewis was was he a Chinook.
• 28:42
  Lieutenant Lewis, the people that don't know him.
• 28:44
  Was was Lieutenant Lewis actually a Chinook pilot in Vietnam?
• 28:49
  Or was he just a soldier in Vietnam?
• 28:52
  He was a cook that got burnt and got a VA pass on going to war.
• 28:58
  We just found the Chinook.
• 29:03
  So in the end, it's you and these battered dogs on this chain just looking like an ASPCA commercial
• 29:11
  because they're just beating them bruised and some of them are dead.
• 29:14
  They all look so sad.
• 29:16
  It's just in the arms of the angel and it's just like you with the hook on your back and your head just like hunched over.
• 29:23
  But I have angel wings on.
• 29:26
  I'm the angel whose arms are around the dog.
• 29:29
  Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 29:31
  Yeah, it's like a whole like Nativity scene situation.
• 29:34
  Like we we we find shepherds.
• 29:37
  So when Lewis pulls up in his Chinook helicopter, you hook the dog on the chain.
• 29:41
  You do your little hand signal.
• 29:43
  Lieutenant Lewis, by the way.
• 29:44
  Lieutenant Lewis pulls up.
• 29:46
  You do your little circular hand signal, tell him good to go.
• 29:49
  All good.
• 29:50
  Does Lewis ever get any PTSD flashbacks?
• 29:54
  Does he have any PTSD episodes while he's piloting this helicopter?
• 29:58
  They ever start firing into houses?
• 30:01
  So yeah, he'll get some PTSD flashbacks.
• 30:05
  Really, the ones where he's thinking a missile has locked on to him.
• 30:11
  So he'll yank that you.
• 30:13
  Yank that yoke really hard back.
• 30:17
  He'll incoming, incoming, incoming.
• 30:20
  Those dogs from ground level just.
• 30:24
  Blink up in the air.
• 30:28
  And around and like he'll stop.
• 30:29
  He'll come out of it.
• 30:30
  Those dogs are still just kind of swinging.
• 30:34
  Pulling some serious G's up there on that line.
• 30:37
  Cord you're getting chopped by the blades of the helicopter as it goes around.
• 30:41
  I am.
• 30:42
  Yeah, the cord gets chopped and those dogs just fly.
• 30:46
  They're just gone.
• 30:46
  He turns on a turns on flight of the Valkyries like it's like he's Duval in Apocalypse now.
• 30:55
  Oh, yeah.
• 30:56
  Oh, yeah.
• 30:57
  Yeah, the dogs go fly and we don't go look for him.
• 30:59
  So like at the end of our shift, we call it a shift.
• 31:02
  I get to the landing pad about the same time as Lieutenant Lewis does.
• 31:06
  And we just kind of he gets out of the helicopter.
• 31:08
  We just kind of look at each other or like, oh, well, no dogs have made it out.
• 31:15
  So like a good soldier, we pack it up and do it the next day
• 31:19
  because I mean, it's a game of numbers.
• 31:21
  Eventually, eventually, we get it right.
• 31:23
  Do you work for Lewis or does Lewis work for you?
• 31:25
  We both work for God.
• 31:30
  I think part of a higher calling.
• 31:31
  I mean, yeah, Lewis has like the old like Catholic Presbyterian priest collar on,
• 31:38
  you know, the little light square.
• 31:41
  But it's just the collar.
• 31:42
  Everything else is whatever he wears in his normal day to day.
• 31:45
  And you know, it's just the white collar.
• 31:47
  He'll wear like his normal like camo, but just he'll just have the white collar on.
• 31:52
  And you know, Lewis has really taken to the Lord.
• 31:55
  Oh, but of the dogs that we did walk successfully,
• 32:00
  we'll do like the old school like landing that you see in Vietnam back at the owner's house,
• 32:06
  you know, where Lieutenant Lewis will land that 20, 30 foot Chinook helicopter
• 32:12
  right in the front yard.
• 32:13
  And we'll I'll be in the back of the yellow go, go, go, go.
• 32:17
  And just tossing the dog out.
• 32:18
  Yeah.
• 32:19
  Ducking as you exit the.
• 32:20
  Yeah, you know.
• 32:21
  Yeah, you know, jumping on the ground with my 1960s M16,
• 32:25
  but just firing around to the house, just providing cover for the dogs.
• 32:30
  You know, of course you want them to get to the house safely.
• 32:35
  Just press the fire is obviously necessary.
• 32:38
  Necessary dog walking.
• 32:42
  There you go.
• 32:42
  Dog walking.
• 32:43
  If you want us to walk your dog, let him get some exercise.
• 32:47
  Come to us.
• 32:48
  We'll let your dog drive a motor vehicle, operate heavy machinery,
• 32:53
  or we'll attach your dog to an old Vietnam helicopter.
• 32:57
  And just I think just fly him around town.
• 33:01
  I think or maybe Evan will take them.
• 33:05
  It'll be questionable what happens to him because he'll take him into a house of horrors.
• 33:09
  Horrors.
• 33:10
  I need to make sure that is clear.
• 33:11
  It's horrors, horrors, horrors.
• 33:12
  Not just horrors.
• 33:14
  I mean, I don't know.
• 33:15
  I don't know the prostitute situation in your house.
• 33:18
  There's both.
• 33:19
  Okay.
• 33:21
  So you don't have to specify.
• 33:22
  Send us a picture of your dog.
• 33:24
  We'll get them hooked up too much in a helicopter.
• 33:27
  But a lot of people come to the Quest for Detour podcast for a lot of things,
• 33:31
  whether it be advice, facts, you know, just overall wisdom and health.
• 33:37
  But one thing that people come to is our vast knowledge about movies
• 33:44
  and movies that maybe a lot of people don't know.
• 33:47
  So we're about to we're about to tell you about some movies.
• 33:50
  So sit back, get some corn and let's have movie time.
• 34:00
  All right.
• 34:00
  The next segment is movie time.
• 34:02
  For those of you who do not remember, we're going to run through some old movies
• 34:06
  and we're just going to guess what we think these movies are about
• 34:09
  based solely on their strange titles.
• 34:12
  So these movies are going to be from the 60s.
• 34:16
  First one we got here, A Man for All Seasons,
• 34:20
  which is something that we've been called many times.
• 34:23
  It sounds like a movie about a a winch, just a whore.
• 34:32
  Someone that has a man every different season of the year,
• 34:36
  four men throughout the year, one for winter, one for summer, one for spring.
• 34:41
  He just trades she trades them out like their shifts.
• 34:43
  Like, I can think I got the next shift.
• 34:46
  Summer Solstice comes and she's like, get out of here.
• 34:50
  You bring me the next.
• 34:52
  I think this movie is about men that just are carrying seasonings in their pockets.
• 35:01
  And, you know, just it's about a chef that is just is struggling to make his restaurant
• 35:06
  productive and profitable, so he's just he's found these men that just carry around some oregano
• 35:14
  in their in their pockets, just loose.
• 35:17
  Oh, there's a man for Rosemary, too.
• 35:19
  There he is. He has him in his cargo shorts.
• 35:22
  Lots of Rosemary.
• 35:25
  And they just carry seasons around.
• 35:28
  I think this movie is about a weatherman looking for love.
• 35:32
  He he's there during every season.
• 35:35
  And he knows all about the seasons.
• 35:37
  He knows when those cold fronts are coming in.
• 35:41
  He knows when it's hot outside.
• 35:43
  You know, I mean, he knows what is hot inside.
• 35:46
  He knows when it's hot inside.
• 35:48
  He's got those seasons down pat.
• 35:50
  Only four of them.
• 35:51
  Not not a lot to memorize, but he knows them is the point.
• 35:56
  He just knows the seasons.
• 35:58
  It's summer.
• 35:58
  It's winter.
• 35:59
  It's summer. It's winter.
• 36:03
  Next one we have is the spy who came in from the cold.
• 36:08
  I think this is about a spy, obviously.
• 36:11
  He's also a hypochondriac.
• 36:14
  Any little thing ends him up in the hospital.
• 36:16
  So he falls in love with this nurse on one of his routine hospital visits
• 36:21
  when he was in there for just the common cold.
• 36:25
  Very lightweight when it comes to pushing through pain.
• 36:28
  Strong, strong in love, weak in immune system.
• 36:31
  Right. Exactly.
• 36:34
  She was pumping morphine through his veins for this common cold.
• 36:37
  Getting him addicted.
• 36:39
  And yeah, he kind of fell in love in the midst of the morphine.
• 36:43
  Yeah, let's say did he fall in love with a girl or the morphine?
• 36:46
  Yes.
• 36:46
  Yes.
• 36:49
  I think this movie is about a very bad spy.
• 36:53
  Like he's not good at it.
• 36:54
  And he couldn't stand how cold it was when he was
• 36:57
  like watching somebody's house gaining intel and it got so cold.
• 37:01
  He just kind of walked in their house.
• 37:03
  He was like, I can't be out there anymore.
• 37:06
  It's too cold.
• 37:07
  He just kind of blew up his position.
• 37:09
  He didn't bring in big enough jacket.
• 37:10
  Yeah, didn't prepare.
• 37:12
  He came in with binoculars and radar dish.
• 37:16
  What a spy's ass.
• 37:18
  I think that this is about a spy who, similar to a man for all seasons,
• 37:25
  he's only active during the summer.
• 37:28
  He will not.
• 37:29
  He came in from the cold and he will not go back.
• 37:32
  You will only use this spy if you have a mission in the Bahamas.
• 37:38
  A little South American trip.
• 37:41
  He's okay with the humidity.
• 37:42
  He just, he won't work in the cold.
• 37:44
  Between June and September.
• 37:45
  Yeah.
• 37:47
  If the temperature dips below 44, he's.
• 37:50
  He's like, you pack enough, I'm going home.
• 37:52
  He's pretty iffy.
• 37:53
  All right.
• 37:55
  The next one is they shoot horses, don't they?
• 37:58
  I think this movie is about a farmer who's being plagued with demon horses.
• 38:05
  And, you know, it's, it starts out as a horror film, very scary.
• 38:09
  And he, he starts shooting these horses.
• 38:12
  He's, he's conquering his demons, so to speak.
• 38:15
  And the twist at the end is just kids playing in horse costumes, one at the butt, one at the head.
• 38:22
  And they're running around in his yard.
• 38:25
  It turns out he's just been kind of sniping them from the crow's nest the whole time.
• 38:30
  Comedy.
• 38:31
  Depends on you ask.
• 38:34
  I think this is an adventure film.
• 38:35
  Uh, I think it's about kind of like an evil, can evil-esque type guy who gets shot out of cannons.
• 38:42
  Does some flips, you know, just does death defying stuff, but a lot of it
• 38:47
  involves getting shot out of bigger and bigger cannons.
• 38:49
  So eventually he goes to another larger circus and sees a gigantic cannon.
• 38:56
  And he's like, what in the world is that for?
• 39:00
  So, you know, he kind of, the day goes on and eventually he gets to the night show
• 39:04
  and he just sees just a bunch of horses next to the cannon.
• 39:07
  And it finally dawns on them.
• 39:10
  They shoot horses, don't they?
• 39:13
  Very good.
• 39:13
  I think this one is about a farmer whose horses recently passed away.
• 39:18
  Um, died of pneumonia and he's interested.
• 39:20
  This one did.
• 39:24
  It might be a horse costume.
• 39:28
  And, uh, he's getting this horse stuffed by local taxidermists, but that's not enough.
• 39:34
  He wants pictures of this horse.
• 39:35
  So he's, it's about him going around town to local photography joints and saying,
• 39:41
  Hey, do you guys shoot horses?
• 39:43
  The next one is wait until dark.
• 39:46
  This is about some rednecks that just don't want to play by the rules.
• 39:55
  They think normal deer hunting is just too boring.
• 39:58
  So one day they're out and I mean, they've gotten normal deer hunting all their lives,
• 40:03
  but, you know, it just, it's starting to get boring for them.
• 40:06
  So one day they were out hunting and guy sees a deer.
• 40:09
  He's about to shoot him.
• 40:10
  The field and his buddy leans over, he says, wait, hold on.
• 40:17
  Wait until dark.
• 40:19
  We can see too much.
• 40:21
  We can see too much.
• 40:22
  We can see the deer.
• 40:23
  This is too legal.
• 40:26
  Let's wait till it's dark when I don't know, maybe the game warden might come up.
• 40:31
  Here's a gunshot.
• 40:33
  I think this is about a few astronomers that probably aren't the sharpest tools in the
• 40:40
  shed and they're trying to look for the moon.
• 40:42
  They keep going out, out during the day.
• 40:45
  They're like, that moon's really bright.
• 40:48
  And slowly they're becoming blind until like one person's like, oh, you want to see the moon?
• 40:56
  You should wait until dark.
• 41:01
  Up next, we have the brain that wouldn't die.
• 41:03
  I think this is about a guy named Brian who's wearing a bulletproof vest and assassins keep
• 41:15
  trying to kill him, but keep on hitting the bulletproof vest and he's just not dying.
• 41:20
  And one of the assassins, who's a poor speller, writes back to the boss.
• 41:25
  He goes, the brain that won't die.
• 41:29
  It was a short story.
• 41:33
  The brain that won't die by assassin one.
• 41:38
  Yeah, but he misspelt Brian.
• 41:39
  You know, I think this is about a seventh grade biology class that they started learning
• 41:48
  about human anatomy and they're on the topic of the brain.
• 41:51
  Well, they were making model figurines in class of the brain, kind of sculpting what
• 41:56
  it would look like.
• 41:57
  And you don't want it to be this white clay.
• 42:00
  Your brains aren't white.
• 42:01
  So they were trying to dye in pink and all but one of them would die.
• 42:06
  And that just that one brain wouldn't die.
• 42:12
  It sounds like a riveting movie of just confused school children.
• 42:15
  Yeah, it's quite literally watching paint dry.
• 42:22
  Next, we have two thousand maniacs.
• 42:25
  Maniacs. This is a movie all about the voices inside of Zach said it's just constant
• 42:32
  screaming, just two thousand of just constant screaming.
• 42:36
  Who's in Maniac?
• 42:38
  They don't even speak English until it's literally just high pitch screaming.
• 42:43
  It's mostly just French.
• 42:49
  Long cigarettes.
• 42:52
  I'm glad I got to star in a movie.
• 42:54
  Yes, I love you.
• 42:55
  All right.
• 42:56
  And the last one is Panic in Year Zero.
• 43:00
  I think this movie is about a family of cavemen.
• 43:04
  Well, there's women there, too.
• 43:08
  Not just men.
• 43:09
  It's a family of early humans.
• 43:13
  And, you know, it's a mirror image of what goes on in the modern world.
• 43:18
  They were just like us.
• 43:19
  They were thousands of dollars or rocks and debt, whatever they used for currency.
• 43:27
  The husband is stressed out and the wife is mad at the husband for not paying her any attention.
• 43:36
  And she goes out and has an affair with a brontosaurus and the family just can't recover.
• 43:43
  There's no orphanage in year one.
• 43:46
  They just kind of toss the kids off a cliff in a bag.
• 43:50
  You know, it's a panic in year zero.
• 43:53
  I think this movie is about just some prehistoric cooking.
• 43:57
  They're trying to cook, but there's just a little bit of it on the pan.
• 44:01
  They just can't quite get it off.
• 44:04
  So it's just dirty all the time and they can't deal with it.
• 44:09
  How are they supposed to cook their food if their pan has it on it all the time?
• 44:13
  It's year zero.
• 44:14
  They haven't been a dished on soap yet.
• 44:16
  Don dish soap yet.
• 44:18
  What are they supposed to do about this?
• 44:19
  All the panic.
• 44:21
  Just so much.
• 44:23
  They don't have don dish soap.
• 44:24
  They have pans.
• 44:25
  Yeah.
• 44:26
  I think this movie is a war film that takes place in the Flintstones universe
• 44:34
  where Fred Flintstone is the equivalent of a B-52 bomber pilot.
• 44:41
  But he's just piloting a pterodactyl.
• 44:46
  And it's about him infiltrating a base, his enemy cavemen, and rescuing his family.
• 44:53
  I don't know why the family was involved in the war.
• 44:56
  Why was the family involved?
• 44:59
  I think if I'm, and I'm flipping through the script now,
• 45:02
  I'm seeing that Fred Flintstone is actually a, he's a pillar of the community.
• 45:10
  He's the leader of a terrorist group.
• 45:12
  The enemies.
• 45:15
  He's running a bombing raid.
• 45:18
  They said that if we steal his family, boy will that get to him.
• 45:23
  It'll turn their organization upside down.
• 45:26
  His family was at the equivalent of Guantanamo Bay.
• 45:30
  Very good movies.
• 45:32
  Again, Hollywood hire us.
• 45:35
  But as we end it, if you have a hypothetical you want us to answer advice you need from
• 45:40
  the three wisest people you know, or just facts about anything on this planet, write
• 45:46
  us in question with detour podcast at gmail.com.
• 45:49
  But as we end it, guys, you'll want to give the Saturday workers a one-liner wisdom.
• 45:54
  Sure.
• 45:55
  Thank you for your concern.
• 45:56
  You can cook and eat pork shoulder, but it's more important to give pork a shoulder to
• 46:02
  lean on.
• 46:02
  Like have a pig cry on you.
• 46:06
  Yeah.
• 46:07
  They go through tough times.
• 46:09
  Yeah, they do.
• 46:09
  If your pipes are clogged up, don't call a plumber.
• 46:13
  Just mix gasoline and vinegar and pour it down the drain and see what happens.
• 46:18
  Does that have to be gasoline and vinegar?
• 46:26
  Could it just be like anything you have on your sink?
• 46:30
  Scientifically, that's the mix.
• 46:31
  I didn't, I didn't make this up.
• 46:33
  This is just a piece of wisdom passed down from generation to generation in my family.
• 46:38
  I thought you were going to say don't call a plum hurt, call plum him.
• 46:42
  Well, I would never trust a plum hurt.
• 46:46
  Oh man.
• 46:47
  But very good.
• 46:49
  You ought to be done.
• 46:51
  Yes.
• 46:51
  Expect the detour.