Latest / Grounded Growth / How to Plan When You Feel Emotionally or Mentally Depleted
Transcript
- Nicole Ghirardi: Hi, welcome to Grounded Growth Podcast. I'm Nicole Girardi. And I'm Stephanie Petry. We believe that grounded growth comes from being intentional about compassionate connections that are beautifully balanced while flourishing in faithfulness. Each week we will share real conversations, encouragement, and simple systems to help build a life that feels steady, aligned, and grounded. So sit back, maybe grab a coffee, and join us where clarity meets calm and growth feels intentional. Steph Mic: Hi guys, welcome back to Grounded Growth. I'm Stephanie Petrie. And we are here for this episode talking about depletion. Stephanie Petry: And I'm Stephanie Petry. We believe that grounded growth comes from being intentional about compassionate connections that are beautifully balanced while flourishing in faithfulness. Each week we will share real conversations, encouragement, and simple systems to help build a life that feels steady, aligned, and grounded. So sit back, maybe grab a coffee, and join us where clarity meets calm and growth feels intentional. Before we dive in, if you want to make sure you never miss a conversation, hit that subscribe or follow button. Nicole Mic: Stephanie Petrie. I'm Nicole Girardi. And we are here for this episode talking about depletion. It's not really the funnest thing to talk about, but it happens to all of us. ⁓ just how do we plan when we feel emotionally or mentally depleted? ⁓ Because can. It is about intentionality and choice, but it is also just being honest with where you are ⁓ and you're feeling ⁓ and Steph Mic: Not really the funnest thing to talk about, but it happens to all of us. ⁓ so just how do we plan when we feel emotionally or mentally depleted? ⁓ you can. It is about intentionality and choice, but it is also just being honest with where you are ⁓ how you're feeling and knowing and having things place in order to continue moving forward. ⁓ Nicole Ghirardi: Before we dive in, if you want to make sure you never miss a conversation, hit that subscribe or follow button right now on whatever app you're listening on. Stephanie Petry: right now on whatever app you're listening on. Steph Mic: want our depletion or these seasons of tough times to just have a stop in our tracks. okay to take a pause but we're going to be just talking through just even our own personal experience with that and things that we have learned. Nicole Mic: Absolutely. And I think that this is a really good timing because a lot of people get in the stage where, okay, January's done. Steph Mic: where, okay, January's done, February's done, now we're in March, and the excitement of the new year has kind of exhausted, and okay, I planned for two months, okay, now I don't need to be doing it anymore. So it's really helping rein it back in for you so that way planning stays consistent for you, so then that way when you did have your good January and February months, it was because you were planning and you're keeping up with it. Nicole Mic: February is done, now we're in March and the excitement of the new year has like kind of exhausted and okay I planned for two months okay now I don't need to be doing it anymore. So it's really helping rein it back in for you so that way planning stays consistent for you so then that way when you did have your good January and February months it was because you were planning and you're keeping up with it ⁓ because I know that that's a big thing is is that it's the end of the quarter Nicole Ghirardi: you for joining us for another episode of Grounded Growth. We hope today brought you clarity, encouragement, and a gentle reminder that you're not walking this journey alone. If this episode spoke to you, we'd love for you to share it, subscribe, and leave a review. We'll see you next week. Until then, Stephanie Petry: Thank you joining us for another episode of Grounded Growth. ⁓ We hope brought you clarity, encouragement, and a gentle reminder that you're not walking this journey alone. If this episode spoke to you, we'd love for you to share it, subscribe, and leave a review. We'll see you next week. Until then, Nicole Mic: It's the third month of the year and things can just feel super, super heavy. Nicole Ghirardi: stay grounded and keep growing. Stephanie Petry: stay grounded keep growing. Steph Mic: And I know that one of the things that consistently works for me is going back to the basics. ⁓ And so I just have to remind myself of what those basics are for me. A lot of times it is my personal habits. And so if I am not getting up and getting in God's word first thing, if I am not working out at least three times a week, ⁓ those are basic things. ⁓ talk about drinking water ⁓ on the podcast, but it's because it really does make a difference. just going back to those basic simple. ⁓ intentional habits tend to help me allow some space for grace for myself during those hard times. knowing when I feel drained. like, do you even know that that's what's wrong? Like, do you even think about or even feel what your body's telling you? Do you pause enough to even know that? So we talked about that with ⁓ as well. ⁓ the same goes for your emotional and mental capacity. ⁓ so being able to know Nicole Mic: drink. do even know that that's what's wrong? Like do you even think about or... Steph Mic: and have the signs of when you are feeling drained and then knowing that's not the week for you to accomplish all the things. So you might need to pull the reins a little bit when you know that you have been spent. Nicole Mic: Yeah, and so I guess the big thing is is like Steph so what do you feel is your key factors or triggers knowing that you feel depleted and you just are done for the week? Steph Mic: So my biggest one is isolate myself So ⁓ I a very relational person and I love to have conversations with others and check in on others and pray for others and all those things So when don't hear from me It's usually because I am Emotionally and mentally drained and I tend to isolate and seclude myself ⁓ And so that's a sign for me that I need to pause and I need to kind of reflect on why am I feeling this way? What's really going on? Am I keeping up with my regular habits? Do I need to have a little change in my routine? Those of things. So mine is isolation. What's yours? ⁓ Nicole Mic: So mine is isolation. What's yours? I mean it kind of works two different ways so like Procrastination comes into play because I'm not planning. I'm not doing my weekly reset So I don't know what's ahead of me So I'm literally looking the night before of what's going on the next day and then I'm like, oh I have a presentation I got to do so procrastination comes into play and then for outward wise I get super crabby if I'm not into my routine and I'm not sticking to my planner. I hate to say it, James and the kids reap kind of the consequences of it because I just don't have my, and it's really is my morning. Like if I don't start my morning, it completely shuts down my whole day and ⁓ ⁓ I over sleep. sleep as much as I possibly can cause I'm just so exhausted. You know, and I'm a lot ⁓ of mentally exhausted more than physically exhausted there's so much going on in my head of all of the things that I need to do because I didn't do my weekly reset and write all of my to-do list and like schedule it out it gets overwhelming and I have the anxiety that I try to keep away from ⁓ ⁓ then just completely shuts me down so ⁓ my big thing yeah ⁓ Steph Mic: to keep away from and it then just completely shuts me down. That is really real. And I can even tell you that this morning I did not do my morning routine. And I felt it all day long. And I was so frustrated with myself too. ⁓ But I ended up, ⁓ I got home, I ended up cleaning, like fast paced cleaning for like an hour ⁓ I didn't get my workout in this morning. And also I may not have done my Roots morning journal this Nicole Mic: I felt it all day long and I was so frustrated with myself too. But I ended up, when I got home, I ended up cleaning, like fast-paced cleaning for like an hour. I didn't get my workout in the first. Steph Mic: But for lunch I ended up listening to to like this devotional ⁓ I was eating lunch just to try to get something in for the day ⁓ Nicole Mic: get something in for day. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, at least you're moving forward. You realize you didn't do your morning, so then that way then you can. It's the ones that we were like, oh, OK, this is day two. This is day three. This is where we're just giving up completely. And you were able to at least realize what your depletion was and then fill it back in in the afternoon, which is always a good thing. Steph Mic: ⁓ okay, this is day two, this is day three, this is where we're just giving up completely. And you were able to at least realize what your depletion was and then fill it back in in the afternoon, which is always a good The other ⁓ tip and trick that I like to do is... You know, I tend to, we tend to have cycles too. And so if I know I'm coming off of a really busy week, I'll try to lighten that load the following week just to kind of give myself a little more space to be. And so I might simple. Nicole Mic: Yeah. So I might simplify some things like meals or cleaning routine. Maybe I'm not doing as much deep cleaning and I'm just doing spot cleaning that week or whatever it might be. But just kind of whatever I can lighten Steph Mic: So I might simplify some things like meals or my cleaning routine. Maybe I'm not doing as much deep cleaning and I'm just doing spot cleaning that week or whatever it might be. But just kind of whatever I can lighten the load with, I try to do that too. Nicole Mic: That's smart. That's what I did this past weekend. So Jojo, of course, had competition all weekend was super exhausting which I love that she loves doing it and it's so fun But on Sunday, we actually had a mommy and me hip-hop class ⁓ So which course I burned tons of calories. I turned my watch on so I got my workout for the day Steph Mic: Because it doesn't count unless it Gotta close those rings ⁓ Nicole Mic: It doesn't count unless my Apple Watch tells me that I burned those calories. Yes. But I had planned to take Monday of an easy day. So then that way I knew that all of the socialness and all of the running around and driving back and forth, I planned for that day. then because I knew that I was going to be exhausted and not wanting to do anything like major project wise. Steph Mic: So when we have our traditional planning and we have been talking about like when we're not doing that, whether it be for that week or maybe even a season, why does it not work? Like why do we realize that it's not going to work for us to continue on planning the way we do when we are having this like depletion mode? And just really thinking about how when we're functioning at our best, that means we are Nicole Mic: traditional planning. Steph Mic: cognizant of our time and our place and our responsibilities and we're on top of the things right and so that's going to be our traditional planning that's going to be what we are considering our normal and our go-to so when we don't reach that we feel like we're failing We feel like that we are not good enough or that something is wrong. And so it may not be that it's something wrong. It just may mean that you need to plan differently for that time. Nicole Mic: So it may not be that it's something wrong, it just may mean that you need to plan differently for that time. Absolutely. I feel like you come in and you're in survival mode. know, you're literally in those type of seasons of your life or the just even a week or you know, whatever the case may be is that we have to look at, know, we are constantly as women on high capacity that we are doing all of the things all of the time and we We can't work at this level anymore. We have to lower our level and say, okay, instead of me doing a time block for the whole day, I'm blocking one hour to do the one priority for the day. It's not the three to four priorities that you normally have a day. You're picking one because we can't look at our to-do list and see that it's going to get all done in a week and that gives anxiety. It's the overwhelming. It completely turns you into burnout. mode you know your goals mean nothing in those seasons ⁓ they're at this level you have to reevaluate and that's the nice thing about realizing your goals can be changed based off of the season that we're going through so have to stop those high expectations and realize that we're normal. Like, you we have to go into that mode of, I'm not gonna get everything done. And you have to be accepting and giving yourself grace for that. because you don't have to be perfect. And that's so hard for me to come out of my mouth, but it's true, is that we aren't going to be perfect. And it's just picking those one, maybe two things if you get crazy, instead of expecting yourself to do all of the things anymore. Steph Mic: And a couple things that came to mind while you were saying that was that we have limits. And so it's hard sometimes to realize that we can't do all the things all the time and that we have limits for a reason. And part of that reason is that we need some humility, that we're human. Another reason is that you're not meant to be in survival mode. mode forever. And so if you find yourself in survival mode, more than not. You need to start talking to some trusted friends and you need to start asking for some help. Maybe even just getting some different ideas of how to do the different tasks that you're trying to get done or even just getting someone to speak into your life and say, does it really matter? Does that thing truly matter? And if so, why? So dig deeper and figure it out. The other thing is that We serve a limitless God. And so you can turn to Him and realize like, you know, even though you have these limits and you have these constraints on your capacity, He doesn't. And so you can just rest in the assurance of knowing that you're in His faithful hands, as well as that you are not in control of all things, He is. So when you are not in control of all things, but you're in control of your response, that's something to keep in mind. You're not in control of all the outcomes. But that doesn't mean that you don't have responsibility to do the things So that's where we can kind of get tripped up in our heads is like, you know God I feel like you're calling me to this and that's that can be true But it also could be true that he's calling you into slowing down ⁓ It can also be true that yeah, he called you into it But the lesson is there too that you're not gonna be able to accomplish it the way you want to there's a lot of things there that we could unpack but those are just a couple things that came to mind when Nicole Mic: Mm-hmm. Steph Mic: we are in our heads about not continuing in the way that we want to. Nicole Mic: continuing in the way that we want to. Absolutely. And that's really kind of a good point of leaning into God's Word is, you know, get the roots journal that we have that is really going to bring you back into being able to dive into His Word and really see what He's trying to bring to you for the day or for that season and pray upon it. And that's where it's really going to help be able to give you some clarity. if that's really what you're seeking during that season. Steph Mic: So when we do have low capacity, how do we still plan? So a few things ⁓ to just be honest with yourself and have that conversation with your loved ones. Talk to your husband about it. Talk to ⁓ your even ⁓ so they can step in and help you in ways that maybe they don't always help you with. ⁓ Even a few trusted friends know so that they can be praying for you or maybe even send you some encouragement throughout. a week, ⁓ pull back on what you can pass off tasks to others. So are there things on your to-do that you could ask someone else to do for you? Nicole Mic: on what you can pass off tasks to others. So are there things on your to do that you could ask someone else to do for you? Yes, love it, love it, love it. so I think that kind of piggybacking on a lot of what you're saying, you know, for the time blockers, ⁓ because I know I'm one, plan for rest. ⁓ Plan intentional rest because that's clearly what you were needing during the season. ⁓ You plan for the recovery time. ⁓ you know, and giving yourself the grace of, okay, well, normally I have 30 minutes to myself to do all of the things. Well, maybe you need an extra 30 minutes. Maybe you need to sleep in. And if it's you planning that, that's what you need to do. So then that way, then you can get yourself back to the normal Nicole of, and being able to do that. And you know, we talked about it earlier. fewer priorities. You do not need all of your priorities filled out on your planner. Your planner may not look like a full planner during this time, and that's okay. And you have to be able to accept that. But being able to plan for the things that are the non-negotiables, that is where you're living at, is the non-negotiables that you have to do week that you know like... We have to wake up our kids. We have to go to work. We have to be able to cook dinner and do the laundry. But maybe it is asking your husband, hey, if I cook dinner, will you clean up the kitchen tonight? And being honest with that, like you said, Steph is is super important. I mean, you can't do it all and you can't hold it in because I was that person and literally was burnout mode to the point that I was depressed and in bed and did not want to get out of bed and We don't want to be that and we have to be there for ourselves, but we also have the littles and they count on us. So being able to do that is super important. You know, and you're going to say no to a lot of things. You're not going to be going out all the time and you know, doing all of the things that you used to do and that is a OK. OK, so give yourself the grace on that one. Steph Mic: And you talked about scheduling rest. That is so important and something that I've had to learn the hard way. And I even realized, like, I didn't really know what that meant for me. know, sometimes people think that rest means taking a nap, and it definitely can. ⁓ But it doesn't have to. And so back when ⁓ Adam had leukemia and he was in the hospital and Travis was one and a half and was, know, with grandma or my friend or, you Nicole Mic: Sometimes people think that rest means taking a nap and it definitely can, but it doesn't have to. And so back when Adam had leukemia and he was in the hospital... I had some alone time. For the first time ever. so I was kind having this identity crisis. Steph Mic: He was being taken care of I had some alone time and for the first time ever And so I was kind of having this identity crisis of like who am I and what do I do at this time? And so what I decided to do was I decided to try different things that were life-giving and that were restful To fill my bucket because I was pouring out so much at that time in my life. And so I had to try Nicole Mic: And so what I decided to do was I decided to try different things that were life-giving and that were restful to fill my bucket because I was pouring out so much at that time in my life. And so I had to try, I really came up with like a list of things and I googled it if I'm being honest because I didn't know what to Steph Mic: I really came up with a list of things and I even Googled it, if I'm being honest, because I didn't know what to try. sounds so silly now, but ⁓ what I had to do. ⁓ my gosh, that wasn't even a thing in 2018. Isn't that crazy? Okay. And so I just, I tried reading. Doing My Nails was one of them. Sometimes I needed to just have a one-on-one, so I'd go have coffee with a friend and have some good conversation. ⁓ Nicole Mic: No, not at all. Use chat GPT, he'll tell you. Steph Mic: Sometimes it was going to a winery with a group of girls. Sometimes it was just quality time with my son. just kind of depended on what I needed at that time. And it took practice. ⁓ didn't know. I mean, I had to just try. Am I feeling like I'm needing some quality time with a loved one? ⁓ am I feeling like I just need ⁓ numb, ⁓ just sit and be numb for a little while? Or do I need literal, legit rest and take a nap? Nicole Mic: Yeah. ⁓ rest and take it out. it just takes some practice. So just try some different things and see. But I want to encourage you that this is temporary. mean like that's the biggest thing here too is that it is temporary. Your survival mode, your low capacity, your depletion, all of those are temporary. This is not going to be forever and you just need to name it for what it is and you need to decide I'm not going to stay there. Steph Mic: So it just takes some practice. So just try some different things and see but I want to encourage you that this is temporary I mean like that's the biggest thing here too. Is that it is temporary your survival mode your low capacity your depletion all of those are temporary This is not gonna be forever and you just need to name it for what it is And then you need to decide I'm not gonna stay there so we're just here to try encourage you to keep moving forward ⁓ Nicole Mic: keep moving forward? Absolutely. And talking about intentional rest, because Steph's rest clearly is different than my rest, because doing my nails gives me anxiety. Like, I mean, I can't tell you how many times that I have bought the stickers. I just bought this new thing that I saw on TikTok and it was like kind of like acrylic nails, but gel. I want to tell you this most stressful thing in my world. Like I, I clearly am not a girly girl. Like it's just not happening. And I was trying to do it to save money, but I'm about to just Steph Mic: Doing my nails gives me anxiety. Kind of like acrylic nails, but gel. I'm gonna tell you this most stressful thing in my world. Like I clearly am not a girly girl. Like it's just not happening and I was trying to do it to save money, but I'm about to just go get my darn nails done because it stresses me out. And group events for me for intentional rest is not rest. Because I'm such an introvert, it is exhausting after I go out. So mine's like literally like last night, the kids of course were lovely children. Nicole Mic: go get my darn nails done because it stresses me out. group events for me for intentional arrest is not rest. Because I'm such an introvert, it is exhausting after I go out. So mine's like literally like last night, the kids of course were lovely children and I love them so much. ⁓ They were on my nerves ⁓ I was like, I'm going to take a bath. Like I'm literally shut the door, do not come in here, which normally JoJo like gets to come in and like talk to me while I take a bath or something to that sort of like, no, no people leave me alone. Steph Mic: so much, they were on my nerves. And I was like, I'm going to the bath. Like, I literally shut the door, do not come in here, which normally JoJo gets to come in and talk to me while I take a bath or something. So I'm like, no, no people, leave me alone, lock me in a room, let me just lay there and just veg out. And that's what I needed last night, because it was long day yesterday. Nicole Mic: lock me in a room, let me just lay there and just veg out. And that's what I needed last night, because it was a long day yesterday. So that's all right. We all have them. It's just how you handle it. So I rested by taking a bath. I love that for you. Yeah. Steph Mic: I'm sorry friend. I love that for you. I'm a 5'10 girl and I can't fit in the bathtub so I have a hot tub for that. so ⁓ talk about the Bible. Nicole Mic: Okay, let's do it. Steph Mic: because we were talking to you about how you're not in this alone and how this is temporary and that we serve a limitless God who is in control of all things. so Isaiah 40 29 through 31 says, he gives power to the faint and to him who has no might, he increases strength. youths shall faint and be weary and the young men shall fall exhausted. But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint. When you feel emotionally and mentally depleted, you turn to the Lord. Everyone has times like this. this is a scripture that ⁓ me a lot of comfort in those hardest times. ⁓ that's because I had to remember that I need to. Nicole Mic: you feel emotionally and mentally depleted, turn to the Lord. Everyone has times like this. this is a scripture that brought me a lot of comfort in those hardest times. ⁓ that's because I had to remember that I need to... Steph Mic: I need to wait on the Lord because His timing and His way is perfect and it is always for my good even when I don't see it. And even in those depletion modes, it's teaching you something. So what is God trying to teach you? And it can be about Him and His sovereignty and His power. It could be about you and what you need to work on in your heart and in your faith. And so just realize that Nicole Mic: I need to on the Lord because His timing and His way is perfect and it is always for my good even when I don't see it. And even in those depletion modes, it's teaching you something. What is God trying to teach you? And it can be about Him and His sovereignty and His power. It could be about you and what you need to work on in your heart. your faith and so just realize that it says that we will grow faint and weary. It's going to happen. It happens to us all. But we are to renew our strength through the Lord and it's not on our own. don't just Steph Mic: It says that we will grow faint and weary. It's going to happen. It happens to us all. ⁓ But we are to renew our strength through the Lord. And it's not on our own. We don't just push through and just keep moving forward. We have to be honest and vulnerable with where we're at. And then we continue forward the strength of God. Nicole Mic: Absolutely, I 100 % agree with you and I think the biggest thing that people realize is that even the strongest and eventually run out of energy that human strength is so limited and that is where God comes into play and swoops us up and says that he is limitless and being able to ⁓ there to be the leaning against his shoulder ⁓ all of the things that we see in the world that we think are just, you know, devastating and we're depleted and can't do anything. ⁓ that's just where, you know, the waiting means that we're trusting him. ⁓ and that we're relying on him and really seeking him instead of trying to power through life alone. Thanks, friend. Steph Mic: So good, so good. All right, so we talked about some heavy stuff ⁓ and we even talked about some hopeful things, I hope, for you. I thought were hopeful at least. And so I just want you to realize that you're not alone. ⁓ And if you feel alone, reach out to us. Get into our Facebook community. ⁓ And ⁓ are to encourage one another. And if you are in the Facebook community, ⁓ let's have chat. Nicole Mic: We did, yes. Mm-hmm. Steph Mic: You know comment on those posts that we make and we would be happy to go back and forth with it I feel kind of silly just answering our own questions, but if that's what it takes. I'll do it Nicole Mic: Yes. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. Steph Mic: But it's about doing life together. That's really what it's about. At Grounded Growth, we are about helping women and encouraging you ⁓ in the life that you have and helping you stay grounded in your growth. So these are for women that don't want to stay the same. These are the women that want to continue to be grounded in their growth with good and rich roots in God's Word, but also keeping their eyes focused forward keep learning because we have to lifelong learners if we are going to continue to pursue the life we're wanting. ⁓ Nicole Mic: Well said, friend. ⁓ all the things ditto. Whatever Steph said, ⁓ completely support and will say it again. Definitely, like we are here to help. want to be able to have you give, if you're needing some type of direction or anything to that sort, I mean, that's where our Facebook community is. And that is where you can DM us on Facebook or ⁓ email us for people that still love to email. And that way we can respond and be able to help with that. So kind of wrapping everything up in a little pretty bow is what we're kind of ending this with is that you don't need a plan with somebody that you're feeling like you need to have it in all full force. You aren't going to have that in depletion mode. Give yourself the grace that you need. Planning can be an act of caring for yourself during that time. just the non-negotiables. And ⁓ that this season doesn't define you. It is just a stepping stone of where God is trying to lead you to. And you know I've been there. Heck, I'm there all the time sometimes I feel like it daily. But there's a reason for it and most of the time ⁓ in my ⁓ it's that need to slow down ⁓ and because go a mile a minute. Yeah. Steph Mic: There's always a reason for it and most of the time in my life is that I need to slow down and because I go a a minute. Here, here. Yeah. Also, I can relate to that because I too am similar. I will say that we have another fun episode, probably a little lighter, hopefully. Nicole Mic: ⁓ I will say that we have another fun episode of probably a little lighter hopefully. Yeah. Next time and so just to kind of go with our... Steph Mic: Next time, and so just to kind of go with our Roots journal with Rooted, which can find on our website, it is going to be about morning routines for busy women who don't have time. And so we're going to give you tips and tricks on that. And we hope that you ⁓ come back next week for our next episode. And until we just want to say stay grounded and keep growing. Absolutely. Bye, guys. Nicole Mic: Absolutely. Bye guys.