Latest / JOY LOVING HOME - SAHM, Productivity, Home Organization, Declutter, ADHD Mom, ADHD SAHM, ADHD Brain / 261: ADHD Hack - Find a New Rhythm to Beat Procrastination
Transcript
- 0:00In our world today, it feels like everything that is being fed to us,
- 0:06particularly online, is slowly destroying our attention span.
- 0:11For those of us with ADHD, sometimes that attention span isn't all that long to start with.
- 0:17So what can we do to force ourselves to slow down and focus when our hyper-focus
- 0:25isn't coming to us and when we just have tasks that are going to take some time,
- 0:34some concentration, and we just can't seem to force ourselves to take it because
- 0:40we start to feel jittery or it starts to feel hard?
- 0:44I've got I hate to call things a hack but I've got a hack for you to try,
- 0:50right after this a wise person once
- 0:53said everybody is a genius but if
- 0:55you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree it will
- 0:58live its whole life believing that it's stupid well fish
- 1:02quit trying to climb trees while getting
- 1:04advice from well-intentioned monkeys it's time
- 1:07to jump in the water and learn how to swim with the current
- 1:10of your life I'm Joy a professional organizer
- 1:13mom of four and fellow fish brain if
- 1:17you're looking for a place to get understanding encouragement and ideas for
- 1:21your home that actually fit how your brain thinks then i'm glad you're here
- 1:26let's ditch the type a advice and embrace what makes our brains and our homes
- 1:31unique together we could have a joy loving home.
- 1:37We're going to be using a timer, which is a huge friend to those of us with
- 1:43ADHD, but we're going to use it in a different way than I think you're used
- 1:47to hearing about because timers are awesome for us.
- 1:51They keep us moving. They prevent us from losing track of time.
- 1:54They enhance that need for urgency that we crave.
- 1:57But sometimes they work against us when it's something that needs to be done.
- 2:04We need to slow down. We've got to focus a little harder.
- 2:08And this constant quick hits of time can make us feel jittery and unable to
- 2:17focus long enough for a task that's going to take a little extra time.
- 2:21Or it's training us to defer, oh, I don't have time for that kind of thing right now.
- 2:29Let me push it down the road, kick it down the road. And then all of a sudden
- 2:32you realize you're not getting any of the bigger stuff done because you're avoiding
- 2:37it with a lot of little things.
- 2:39So we're going to try something.
- 2:43And if you would like, give me a shout back about how you feel about it.
- 2:48I will tell you one of the things, this is an aside here that tickled me,
- 2:53is that I had asked in a previous podcast for you to reach out to me if you
- 2:59resonated with what I was talking about.
- 3:02And I just said, email me joy at joylovinghome.com. I love to hear from you.
- 3:07I got your emails, those of you who reached back my way, and I am so tickled
- 3:12that you did. Thank you so, so much for that.
- 3:15I have been horrible about working on email responses.
- 3:20So you will hear back from me, but just know I did get that.
- 3:23So if you took the time to reach towards me, just know it's so appreciated.
- 3:28So anyway, if you do decide to give this idea a try, give me your feedback.
- 3:34I'd love to hear how it's working for you or not.
- 3:37So what we're going to try and do is what I'm calling the reverse rumba.
- 3:43Not to be confused with a rumba, I did a whole podcast on rumba vacuums.
- 3:47That's not what this is. This is the rumba.
- 3:50And if you are a fan of dancing with the stars like I am, you may know that
- 3:55the rhythm of a rumba is slow, slow, quick, quick, slow.
- 4:01And we, with our need for.
- 4:07Urgency, we're not going to do that kind of rhythm.
- 4:10So we're going to do the reverse of that, which is quick, quick, slow, slow, quick.
- 4:17So all you need to try this activity is a timer and ideally a pad of post-it
- 4:25notes or a scrap piece of paper.
- 4:28If you have your phone, you are more than welcome to use the timer on your phone and your notes app.
- 4:35That will work as well. I just like to jot things down where I can like walk
- 4:40back over and look at them.
- 4:42Physically, I think writing helps our brain too, but you do you.
- 4:46Either way will actually work. So what we need is to break some time,
- 4:53and in this case, it's going to be an hour, and you may go, Joy, I don't have an hour.
- 4:57You don't have to do this all in one setting. But if you have an hour, you can carve out.
- 5:04Kids are at preschool for, you know, by the time you drop them and get home
- 5:08and have to leave to go pick them up, you might have like an hour and 20 minutes.
- 5:14Take an hour of it and try this. So the first thing you're going to do is you're
- 5:18going to set the timer for five minutes.
- 5:20And on that post-it pad or in your notes app, you are going to jot down some
- 5:25quick, easy, brainless things that would make your life better if you just got them into production.
- 5:32Things like making a bed or starting a load of laundry or emptying a dishwasher
- 5:37or filling a dishwasher or switching the laundry over or any of those like quick
- 5:42hits that it makes it feel like, okay,
- 5:46I did a little bit of something, those, you know, vast.
- 5:51Tidy of a room, whatever. So just jot down the things really quickly that come
- 5:57to mind when you think of quick brainless activities that the whole point of
- 6:03the quick ones are just keep your body in motion.
- 6:06So on this five minute timer, you're jotting down things that your brain thinks
- 6:10of that would make your life a little nicer.
- 6:13Okay, then you also need to jot down those things you've been kicking down the
- 6:19road and avoiding because they feel really big or very hard to concentrate or anything like that.
- 6:26So it may be making a phone call to an insurance company to figure out a bill
- 6:33or it might be getting a reply to an email that you actually have to stop and
- 6:40write and think about appropriate response.
- 6:43It might be needing to actually gather and sort through that box that you had
- 6:52intended to take to two separate donation areas,
- 6:55but you just keep avoiding it because you hadn't thought through or like you
- 7:00threw a bunch of stuff into a donation box,
- 7:02but you now know a friend who needs some of it and you haven't sorted through.
- 7:06Things that take a little more of our brain power, and we keep avoiding them
- 7:12because of our time blindness. We believe this will take three hours to do.
- 7:16We don't know how long it's going to take, but we're going to jot those things
- 7:20down that make us feel a little squirmy, like that you drank coffee,
- 7:25but you've had new food, and that jittery feeling,
- 7:28and just the thought of slowing down to do them,
- 7:31you're, you know, just activates something in you, just put them down on paper.
- 7:37Don't, don't feel any pressure about them yet. Just get them out of your brain
- 7:40and onto this piece of paper. Okay. The timer should have gone off pretty quickly.
- 7:45First five minutes, done. That's your first quick. Your second quick,
- 7:49you're actually setting the timer for 10 minutes.
- 7:51And in that 10 minutes, I want you to feel that urgency. I want you to rush
- 7:55around. I want you to see how many of those brainless things.
- 7:58Can you run up and get the washing machine started so that that is working in
- 8:03the background in your favor?
- 8:05Can you hurry up and make your bed? Can you zip through and get all the things
- 8:11that are in the kitchen over towards the sink, even in a sudsy load of sink,
- 8:16even if you're not going to wash them,
- 8:18just rush yourself against that 10-minute timer and see how many of those sort
- 8:23of brainless activities that would make you feel better about your home you can do in 10 minutes.
- 8:28All right, when that timer goes off, that's your quick quick.
- 8:32All right, the next timer you're going to set is for 20 minutes,
- 8:36and 20 minutes is going to feel like an eternity.
- 8:40It's going to make you want to squirm.
- 8:43What I'm asking you to do is to say, I can do anything right now for 20 minutes.
- 8:51I've committed to this 20 minutes. And I want you to pick any one of your slow
- 8:57activities and just start.
- 9:00You're not racing against the clock. I'm not asking you to get it fully completed.
- 9:05Ask yourself, what would it take for me to call my insurance company?
- 9:11I need to go find my insurance card.
- 9:14Great. You walk over. There's no pressure on this. You find it.
- 9:18You say, there's going to be questions. There's going to be notes.
- 9:21There may be, I might need information.
- 9:24How did I find the bill that I'm supposed to be talking about?
- 9:29How do I find the details on the car I'm supposed to be talking about? Whatever.
- 9:32You start to gather those things. If that takes the full 20 minutes and the timer goes off, fine.
- 9:39No worries. You have choices.
- 9:42That sort of getting started on a hard task is now completed,
- 9:46which feels great because all of the needed information has been gathered together.
- 9:50And you can start the second slow, because remember we're doing quick,
- 9:55quick, slow, slow, quick. So if you're like, okay, I actually feel okay about this.
- 10:02I'm going to continue in the same task.
- 10:05When you reset the timer for 20 minutes, keep going.
- 10:09Keep going and see if you can make that call and actually complete whatever that one task was.
- 10:17If you finish it before that timer goes off, look down at the next thing.
- 10:22Maybe the next thing is scheduling a doctor appointment.
- 10:27So you go grab your calendar, you grab the kids' calendars, you're trying to
- 10:32see what are possible dates, and you get the phone number together,
- 10:37and maybe the timer went off.
- 10:40And that's okay. You have forced yourself to sit through two slows and seeing
- 10:46how long things that feel like they're going to take forever take.
- 10:51You've gotten started on something that's difficult for you to focus on.
- 10:57Now, that last quick, so we've done a quick, a quick, a slow, slow.
- 11:01Your last quick is a five-minute timer because that's all you've got left to
- 11:05this hour that I've asked you to set aside.
- 11:08In your five minutes, and this is where it's really nice to actually have a post-it note.
- 11:12Is in whatever you started with the slow,
- 11:17your five-minute timer is for you to take your pencil and your post-it note
- 11:23and tell yourself where you left off or what the next step would be.
- 11:29Because the hardest part when we sit down to these slow, painful things that
- 11:33don't always work out when we try them the first time,
- 11:36the number of times I build up my energy to make the phone call and then I don't
- 11:42get an answer and they have to call me back or I try and they needed more information
- 11:46that I had and now I've got to go find something else.
- 11:50Whatever status you are leaving this slow task at, you are writing yourself
- 11:56a note so that you know exactly where to pick up again the next time you force
- 12:01yourself to slow down again.
- 12:02You're not starting all the way back at scratch.
- 12:06All of this work that you already did is going to build and your momentum is
- 12:10going to carry you to completing these slow tasks that you don't seem to have
- 12:16the attention span for anymore.
- 12:18And when that five-minute timer is off, your hour is done. Move on.
- 12:23You go do what you needed to do. You rush off. You go grab the kids.
- 12:26Or if you're like, okay, that was sort of the most productive hour I've spent
- 12:30in a while, what if I repeat that?
- 12:33Then start over grab your
- 12:36five minute timer write down the new things you want
- 12:39to try and get done do your 10 minute timer run
- 12:42through and do as many of the quick brainless tasks as you can
- 12:45then when you get to the slow down pick right up where you were and try and
- 12:50go through that same longer lasting task again again you get a second 20 minutes
- 12:57and then the most important piece of this is in that last five minute blip,
- 13:03you are reminding yourself where you're leaving off on that slow task.
- 13:09See if this reverse rumba, and I'm giving it a name so that you can think about
- 13:14it when you're feeling stressed about what you're going to get done in a day,
- 13:18and you're like, what will get me up off this couch and get me moving?
- 13:22Go, oh, wait, I remember Joy talked about trying a reverse rumba.
- 13:26I'm going to try that. Wait, wait, wait. A rumba is slow, slow, quick, quick, slow.
- 13:30So we're going to do quick, quick, slow, slow, quick, and it's 5, 10, 20, 25.
- 13:38Give it a go. Let me know what you think.
- 13:42I know you can do this. We're going to use the timers not just to keep us in motion,
- 13:47not just to help us keep track of time, but we're going to actually use it to
- 13:54stretch our attention span a little bit and slow down and do some of those tasks
- 13:59that we won't give ourselves the time to do.
- 14:02Another one that I happen to think of,
- 14:05was, I really need to sort of wipe down all of my kitchen cabinets.
- 14:09But to me, in my brain, that's going to take like three to four hours.
- 14:13It probably won't, but in my brain, that's how long it's going to take.
- 14:16And I don't have three to four hours. And I think, well, if I start this.
- 14:22I got to get all the stuff together.
- 14:24I got to make, you know, the solution that I want to use on the cabinets.
- 14:27I've got to be wiping down. I got to need my stepladder out because my cabinets are tall.
- 14:32I probably should dust them before I wipe them down.
- 14:35I start to talk myself out of all of these things.
- 14:40If I were to say, this is what I'm going to slow down and do.
- 14:43I'm going to see how far I get in 20 minutes.
- 14:46If I'm in a rhythm, I'm going to do them for a second 20 minutes.
- 14:50If I definitely have to stop at the end of the 20 minutes, at least on a post-it
- 14:55note, I can write to myself, you stopped here wiping down cabinets,
- 15:00and I can stick it on the inside of the cabinet door where I stopped.
- 15:04And then if I start on the left side, or I started in one corner,
- 15:08and I'm trying to work my way around, I know right where I left off,
- 15:12I'm going to ignore the fact that the ones I already have cleaned might look
- 15:15dirty again, because I want them all to be hit once.
- 15:18And then maybe one time I start back over.
- 15:21I don't know. But I just, I don't have the patience to start something that
- 15:27in my brain is going to take forever or that I don't know how to get started
- 15:31or I don't know how to stop effectively.
- 15:34This is to help weed out all of those excuses and get it done. All right.
- 15:41I'm going to stop there. If you ever want to reach out, I'll remind you,
- 15:46joy at joylovinghome.com.
- 15:47I have a free group that is bit.ly slash joylovinghomecommunity.
- 15:55And then I have my membership, which is $10 a month where we work together with some accountability.
- 16:01Every Tuesday, we call it Tackle It Tuesday.
- 16:03And intermittently on the other days, you're more than welcome to ask questions
- 16:07and get feedback from the very lovely members. But you find out about that at
- 16:12joylovinghome.com slash membership.
- 16:14I hope that you continue to choose joy.