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The Biggest Dating Shifts Of 2026 So Far | S5 EP135 · Around the Kinky Kampfire Podcast

• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back, everybody, to another episode of Around the Kinky Campfire.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: This is your host, the glorious one.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'm feeling very confident today because I'm packing to go on a trip, which I'll talk about later time, but I've been talking about it a little bit over the last few weeks.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: Naughty New Orleans.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but yeah, more details about that later.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to throw down a quick episode because when this comes out, I'll be in the middle of hijinks in an adult behavior kind of way.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: And I wanted to put this out before I left, or record this before I left.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: So you guys have something to listen to while I'm gone.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_00: You campsters out there that are sitting on bended knee at the edge of your seats waiting for episodes to come out every week.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_00: I know you are.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_00: Hopefully.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so today, HH Julius Marquise is my name, and this is around the kinky campfire, new episodes, audio Thursdays, video Fridays, all that, all that jazz most of the time.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: Before we get into today's topic, which is more lighthearted and more commentary-ish, like for me, we will be sipping a non-sponsored drink for the ASMR 10 seconds.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_00: I have with me again sparkling ice caffeine, blue raspberry flavor, zero sugar, 70 milligrams of caffeine.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_00: Deliciousness, but unsponsored nonetheless.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: Would like a sponsorship at some point, that'd be nice.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: But here we go, ASMR two seconds.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: Three, two, one.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, almost banned to five.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, teeth cold.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, caffeine good though.
• 2:29
  SPEAKER_00: Blue raspberry, delicious.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_00: Let's get into this before I run out of time.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_00: And then I gotta get back to packet.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, so what do we have here today?
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: Very lighthearted topic.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: I read about I came across this recently.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_00: No, this is about a month ago.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: But I was like, let me do this at the halfway point.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: Because we were halfway through the year.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: If y'all did not know, this is the first full week of July, and the year is officially halfway over, sadly.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_00: So quickly it flew by.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, look at there, rhyming, and I didn't even know it.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm excited for the last half of the year.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know about y'all, but I am a first half of the year type person.
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: I like it when um the cold goes getting ready to go away and it becomes hot again.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_00: Beginning of summer.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: Spring is better than the fall.
• 3:15
  SPEAKER_00: In my opinion, fall just depresses me because I know the time's gonna be cut short.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: We're gonna do away with that stupid daylight savings time bull crap.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: Literally off time.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_00: This part of which is weird because it's this part of the year that we're off by an hour compared to the rest of the world, and like 2% of America, which makes no sense whatsoever.
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: Alaska does not do daylight savings time, neither does Whitey, just so y'all know.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: Very weird for those people that don't know that kind of thing.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, and part of Arizona.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_00: Anyways, just stupid.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: Let's do away with it.
• 3:45
  SPEAKER_00: But we're gonna talk about the second half of the year, the sad part.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: Ha ha no, we're gonna talk about the first part of the year and see how it works out.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: These are the dating trends thus far.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I think it's about a month old, according to this article.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: Once again, I'll put the reference links in the in the description, hopefully.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: And uh want to talk about the dating trends thus far and give my commentary on them, my opinions, such and such.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so the first half of the year, for the most part.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: Let's see.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: Introduction.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: Introduction.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_00: Dating is going undergoing a renaissance, which is good.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_00: We talked about the um uh Chalant's dating before.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: I mentioned it earlier in a previous episode, and um hopefully that goes away with these uh dating trends thus far, because that shit was stupid.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, uh going on Renaissance, uh divorce rate continue to remain steady, which is interesting, still above 50%, just so y'all know.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: Um, y'all monogamous people or I shouldn't just point out the monogamous you people that believe in marriage.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: I'll comment on those people.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: Ha ha ha ha.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: Doesn't make any sense.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: Um and of course the trend that uh content creators have out there.
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_00: Would you like uh would you like to be with a man or a bear?
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: What's worse, like five no, not the gorilla one, just the bear one.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: It's like I'd rather be with a cage with a bear than with being a man.
• 5:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's like that kind of bull crap that's been going out there, okay.
• 5:10
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but people are becoming more strategic in dating, which is good.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: Uh incorporating different techniques.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: So we are red flags.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_00: Red flags, um, if y'all don't know, have been a big thing in um pop culture recently.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: So interesting.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and then finding compatibility with potential partners.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_00: So that's it for the introduction.
• 5:27
  SPEAKER_00: I just find it funny that um all these trends that are going on is is very much in the societal uh zeitgeist, but me personally, I don't know any of my single friends that are doing this, but in general, people still hate dating apps and want to try to meet people in person, but then they're introverts and they'll want to go out to social events.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't understand that shit.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: That doesn't make any sense to me.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: You have to talk to people.
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: How are you gonna find a partner if you don't talk to people online or in person?
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what are you doing?
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, going kind of fast here, just so I don't run out of time before I get through all of these.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: There's ten of them, so we'll see.
• 6:04
  SPEAKER_00: Top ten of 2026 thus far.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_00: Alright, number one, political deal breakers.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Seems kind of obvious, okay?
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: Don't talk about politics or religion on the first date.
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody knows this, hopefully.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: Hopefully.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_00: If you're a young person that is still single, don't do that shit.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: And stop putting it on social on your social media account.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: So stupid that people do that.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: Um, of course, politics are very important.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: Women rank political views as one of the most important characteristics in a partner.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, okay.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, sure.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and then these are not the queer dating trends, so it's kind of you know, hetero um heterofocused.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: So I'll just say I'll try to generalize as much as possible because y'all know here at Around the Kinky Campfire we are very queer positive, as I am also a queer person, and I want to try to relate it to everybody, not just the heteronormative people.
• 6:58
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so we'll try and see.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: But I would say political stuff is very much in the queer world as well.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people put that on their profiles, okay?
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_00: That's important for some people.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's not surprising that more women prefer partners who share similar protocol.
• 7:12
  SPEAKER_00: A man's political view uh can a lot about his character.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: I always think that's weird.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, um, right, people don't want to date a Trump supporter, big orange that's out there, that's in the White House there, which I understand.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I just know for me that is not something uh that I uh like I won't say I won't rule somebody out for that.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: I'll just ask why.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_00: That's not just like all right, you're out the door because you supported that person.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just like, why?
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: I need more, I need more uh information.
• 7:42
  SPEAKER_00: What are we doing here?
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: Why are you putting it out there?
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: Also, the people that put their political views out there in the open like that.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: I can understand if you're liberal, okay, but I just don't give a fuck.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_00: Um, if that's your only like identifying factor, um, I I question that.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_00: It's like what depth do we have here?
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_00: People should be asking more questions, not just going by the book's cover, but ask more questions.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_00: What are we doing?
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: Just don't write, I mean, do what you want to do, write somebody off if you want to.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: But I personally, Julius, need more answers.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: I need more answers, so I'm gonna ask plenty of questions.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I say that I need more answers, but I don't have to have the answer.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'll I'll keep asking questions, and I need more answers in order to keep talking to somebody, but I'm also kind of just not talking to everybody because I am an introvert at heart, so there you go.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: Number two, therapy lingo, of course.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_00: We hear this all over the place, and you hear it a lot here.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm a hypocrite.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: Here we go.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: The everyday person is using them to communicate their emotional needs, create boundaries and patterns in their behavior, understand patterns and behavior.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: Social media has helped increase mental health awareness, which is good and bad.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_00: It's important not to misuse popular words.
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, God, and we know what those popular words are.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_00: People label people narcissists and talking about gatekeeping.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: First of all, trauma bonding, y'all use that word incorrectly.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of the definitions that people are are are getting wrong for these words, and it's like, what are we doing here?
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: Are we doing our research?
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_00: Are we just throwing random words out there and not knowing what the actual um definition is of this word?
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_00: So if you are the type of person, I know for me, I will ask more questions once again, because I want to know you know what you're talking about, and then also stuff like narcissists, only a trained professional can label somebody as that.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_00: So you can just say it all you want, doesn't mean shit because you're not a trained professional.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: Let's just say that right there.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: So people can have narcissistic tendencies, and that also I want to go a little bit deeper on this because for those of us that put out contents on the internet, you gotta have a little bit of narcissism, okay?
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_00: It is not an on and off thing.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_00: There's a gray area, it's a spectrum.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_00: Gotta have a little bit, gotta be like 1090 or something like that.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: 10% narcissist, 90% normal person, anti-narcissist, whatever you want to call it.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_00: Because if we are putting our content out there or just trying to get um people to understand what we're talking about, we have to think we are somewhat right or correct in a some way.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_00: I don't like right, correct in a certain way, and in order to do that, you have to believe what you say, and then also be able to get the other person to believe what you say.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_00: That's narcissism, that's a little bit of narcissism right there, just so y'all know.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: So we are all a bit narcissistic.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_00: We should be, at least.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_00: If you are trying to do something, now if you're one of those people who just kind of goes with the flow and does what everybody else wants, you don't have an opinion on anything or a strong opinion on anything whatsoever, feel free.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_00: Let that narcissism die.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: Be down to 1%, 0.5%, 0.001%.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: However, you want, totally fine.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to do that, totally cool.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_00: That's that type of thing.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: But yeah, we're all a little bit narcissistic, especially if you, you know, in front of a camera talking about stuff on the internet.
• 12:35
  SPEAKER_00: Definitely got a little bit over there, because I think I'm correct, Elite.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: I don't care if I'm right or wrong, but I think I'm correct.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: Uh like I said, this is facts-based podcasts with my opinions and my experiences put out there for y'all.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_00: So, I'm a little bit narcissistic too, because I decided to turn this camera on and turn this mic on and start recording stuff for y'all people, okay?
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_00: You campsters out there.
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, we all gotta have a little bit of narcissism.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_00: Stop using it like it's an on uh 100% thing, just stupid, okay?
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_00: Do a little research, like I did here for these, obviously, for these notes.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: Did so much research.
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_00: Many, many hours, not really.
• 13:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um, clear coding.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_00: Number three, more people are being direct with what they are looking for in a partner and what they want.
• 13:22
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, stop this chalance bullshit.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_00: Takes out the guessing games of dating and helps reduce situationships and uh compatibility priorities compatibility.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's another thing.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I know I've said this before, never been part of the hookup culture and the situationship business.
• 13:38
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I don't understand.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: I don't need to understand.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: I know what it is, but I still don't understand people doing it.
• 13:45
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: Let's say I don't understand the motivation behind it, okay?
• 13:49
  SPEAKER_00: And if I'm not motivated behind something, I'm not gonna do it.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: So I'll just say that.
• 13:52
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand the motivation.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: And Ugh.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I got that summertime crap that's going around crud.
• 14:00
  SPEAKER_00: Um, great thing for a pre-trip.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_00: Uh okay, so yeah.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_00: Situationships right over my head.
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: Part of my um tism isness or something, symptoms or just the a spectrum stuff.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand it.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: If I'm gonna be talking to you, then it's gonna be like some kind of relationship.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, situationship has the ship in there, so that's interesting.
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, I don't understand it.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: Why would you do it?
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_00: Well, short-term dating as a as a thing.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I don't, yeah, sure.
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: So many non-words there um that I came out my mouth, but I don't I don't understand.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_00: Help me understand if you understand situationships and the motivation behind it.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: Write me an email at the um linked email in the intro and outro, and also the social medias.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: Let me know what you're thinking.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: And comment below if you're watching this on YouTube.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, micro dating number four involves short, low pressure dates like 30-minute coffee shop meetups, uh, which makes sense to me.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: I like them as a uh way to get to know somebody low pressure.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: Uh practice may seem a bit rushed and impersonal, but it helps create a low pressure environment where people can be more themselves and not worry about the elaborate and often expensive details of a first date.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: I will say, I guess, is as somebody that's been doing dating for many decades, a dinner date does not seem high pressure to me.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: Might be for some people, because you're like sitting there just chatting.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, I just know for me, I try to weed people out, so by the time we get to the first date experience, I'm looking forward to a couple three, four hour chat.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, and it that's too short in my opinion.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: So the coffee date is also good, or just a drink date in general, if you're above the age and are into drinking adult beverages, doesn't have to be though.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm totally fine watching somebody drink or just being watched drinking, which sounds weird to say, but to each their own, if somebody it doesn't want to drink alcohol, I'm totally fine just drinking waters and having a chat, or if they're not into coffee during the day, like I am.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_00: Totally fine.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, so low pressure to me, coffee date versus the dinner date and lunch date, whatever, is uh all low pressure.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: I just enjoy conversation.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_00: But I know for some people talking in person is not a skill that they have practiced for many decades, um, such as myself.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_00: So I understand the low pressure of it all, and the micro date is good.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, if you have not gotten to the point where you can suss people out uh before a 30-minute meet, then that is good as well.
• 16:43
  SPEAKER_00: Don't want to talk from my high horse there.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_00: I've made a lot of fucking mistakes.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm just letting y'all know.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: And uh it's very interesting to see uh that micro dating is a word.
• 16:54
  SPEAKER_00: Is it in the dictionary yet?
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: Is the question.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: So for me, the micro date is a good is a good concept.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: That one I understand compared to situationships, and it's also like yeah, get those warmups in there.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_00: If you need to suss somebody out still in that 30 minutes, decide whether you want to move on or not, is uh is good.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: For me, it's very much like okay, checkboxes have been checked before the date, and then during the time, it's like okay, I kind of understand what's going on.
• 17:23
  SPEAKER_00: Unless something takes like a weird left or right turn all of a sudden, once meeting in person, then it's like, ooh, okay, that's interesting.
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_00: Um, not saying it hasn't happened recently, I still have my um calibrating to do, kind of sort of.
• 17:36
  SPEAKER_00: So I completely understand that.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_00: And um, yeah, that's um it's a good idea.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_00: Micro dating.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: Low pressure.
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_00: Ooh, number five, friend fluence survey conducted by Tinder.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_00: Interesting.
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_00: Over 40% of single people said their friends influence who they date.
• 17:52
  SPEAKER_00: Whoo, how do you do that?
• 17:53
  SPEAKER_00: If the group chat says he's a red flag and isn't convinced about his potential, neither are they.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_00: So, for those people, apparently a lot of people do, which I did not know, that have friends that uh they value that sounds terrible.
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_00: Value their opinion?
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_00: That sounds bad.
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_00: Um, it's not even that I don't value my friend's opinion, it's like, do they know enough about me to understand what I'm looking for?
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_00: Um, if you are one of those people that have friends that can do that, I am jealous.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so I just thought it was funny too that those from Tinder that influenced the date.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I'm a good red flag finder myself, and also if it's like a red flag and I don't find it, then it's like okay, um, another lesson learned there.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_00: I have no trouble making minor mistakes.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: Obviously, you don't want to get in any situation, but if you're seeing me on YouTube, there's not a whole lot of like physical dangers I have to worry about.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, they're there, but I don't really have to worry about them, or I just don't attract people that I feel physically endangered by.
• 18:57
  SPEAKER_00: We'll see in the future.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_00: I may be eating my words, but now it's recorded and on the internet that I said these things.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_00: So totally fine eating my own words and um being told as I told you so.
• 19:09
  SPEAKER_00: So that's the kind of thing.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_00: So I would just say that umfluence is interesting for me.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's another one of those things I don't really understand the motivation behind, um, just because I don't have those type of friends, but for the people that do, I'm very jealous of you.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: And your friends and family continue to be an influence on who you date.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_00: More power to you.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, number six, we're halfway done, and I'm almost running out of time.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: Dating apps are becoming obsolete.
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: People are talking, taking a break from swiping and going to the traditional route, approaching people in real life.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, if you are one of those people that has to do that and is not successful on the dating apps, which again is a skill that a lot of people don't understand, has to be practiced and intentionally worked on, which is kind of strange to me.
• 19:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because a lot of people get frustrated with the dating apps.
• 19:57
  SPEAKER_00: I still have not found very many people um that are for the dating apps, even if they are a partner, which is interesting.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: It's like this is how we met, and yet still don't like it, which is understandable.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_00: I think the um biggest um faux pas or biggest assumption that people made that's very incorrect is that it's successful a lot of the times, but no, you still gotta go through like 90% bullshit, it's 100% bullshit for that 95%.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_00: There's maybe five percent if you're lucky.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_00: That's not bullshit.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like I think people think it's higher than that.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, no, a dating app is a product that people are trying to sell, so they're going to gaslight you into believing that it's successful.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: How many times have you seen the ad that oh this is the dating app that needs to that should be deleted at some point?
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's bullshit, unless you're intentionally working on your dating app skills.
• 20:50
  SPEAKER_00: There are dating app skills, and this person knows them.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I don't actually use them as of yet because I don't really need to.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_00: That sounds very conceited.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_00: But, anyways, I could do better myself as well.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_00: But there are actual dating app skills that need to be worked on if you want to be successful, whatever your purpose is.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's another thing, too.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not trying to run my numbers up, so I don't want to be super successful.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_00: Uh if that uh if that's a thing, um, could go into a deeper dive on that whole entire thing, but we'll see.
• 21:18
  SPEAKER_00: Uh okay.
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: Number seven, engagement hard launch.
• 21:21
  SPEAKER_00: People are now keeping their dating life more private and aren't posting their significant others until there's an actual engagement.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_00: There's another thing I don't understand.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_00: I've never been one of those people to like update my Facebook status.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't give a fuck about that.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: Or FedLife status.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_00: I don't understand that.
• 21:35
  SPEAKER_00: You don't will not, it's not like a hard thing.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, you won't know who my partners are, but I just don't care about putting that stuff online.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_00: What is the point of that?
• 21:44
  SPEAKER_00: I have heard people, including friends, be like, oh, the person didn't update their Facebook status.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_00: Say we're I was like, I don't give a fuck.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: Why do you care about that?
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_00: I don't need people to know who I'm dating and canoodling with, even if it was serious.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_00: Never been that way, but there are people that care about that crap online.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: I don't I don't understand that either.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, the 777 rule designed to keep couples connected through intentional quality consists of date night every seven days, a weekend away every seven weeks, and a vacation every seven months.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: I wish I had the time and resources for that.
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: The dating, I understand, depends on what kind of date it is.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: Most dates I prefer.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: Number one quality time thing is cuddling, watching watching a movie and or TV show, or and or just uh chatting.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: So doing that once every seven days, 100% my number one priority with any partner.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_00: I would prefer it.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: Doesn't have to be in necessity, priority.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: So if it doesn't happen, that's totally fine too.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_00: Just depends on what kind of communic communic communication communication is happening along the way.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: I can communicate correctly and say words completely.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_00: Um, yeah, so I every several months of vacation, that would be amazing.
• 23:04
  SPEAKER_00: I heard about the 18-month rule, I didn't hear about the seven-month rule.
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's crazy.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, and then every s every uh weekend away, man, that would be nice.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_00: You can tell this is very hair to normal because uh somebody that's in the poly world, that'd be kind of tough with multiple partners.
• 23:19
  SPEAKER_00: I would love it though, that'd be great.
• 23:21
  SPEAKER_00: Oh man, I'm thinking about it now.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_00: That's a great fantasy world people are living in.
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_00: Seven months for a vacation?
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_00: How doesn't say how long the vacation needs to be?
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_00: That's crazy.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: Vacation, yeah.
• 23:34
  SPEAKER_00: So how would you even work seven months?
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_00: So two weeks?
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_00: How long the average vacation?
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_00: Because you're talking about a weekend every seven.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_00: Oh yeah, I'm trying to do the math in my head.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know where that seven seven seven number came from.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: That's weird.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, if you know how to work that out of your head, send me the math mind thing.
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_00: Um send me proof, mathematical proofs, if they still do that now, and let me know in the comments below or social media.
• 24:07
  SPEAKER_00: Is or email how that works out.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_00: Because I want to know what the average vacation is like.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_00: I couldn't imagine taking a vacation every seven months.
• 24:14
  SPEAKER_00: That's kind of interesting.
• 24:15
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: Second or last, number nine, Shreking.
• 24:19
  unknown: Oh god.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: This one here is just so stupid.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_00: Means dating someone you think is below your league.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_00: Oh god.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: Or someone you have a better treatment in the upper hand in the relationship.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: Like, in order to do this, first of all, it says it might backfire because you might be getting Shreked yourself.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: Is um you assuming you know everything about a person to consider them below you?
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like nobody is above anybody else.
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_00: We're all on this equal level.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_00: Just because most of society likes to focus on looks doesn't mean like you have to.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: So what values are we like figuring out here?
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_00: I hope it's not intelligence, because that would be fucking bullshit.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_00: Potential?
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_00: I don't even know.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_00: Like, how are you calculating what is above or below you?
• 25:04
  SPEAKER_00: Good lord.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: I hope we're not just doing looks now in these days, even though I say that knowing that people do, which is so bullshit.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: So the whole concept of this Shreking thing is kind of wild to me.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: Um, because like what do we so objective?
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Uh God, so so terrible.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 25:24
  SPEAKER_00: Lastly, we have throning.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_00: Uh having a large following can elevate your personal brand.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: So this is all online bull crap.
• 25:32
  SPEAKER_00: Clout cash clout cashers don't necessarily care about obtaining wealth, so it's not about the your in-person value, but your online value.
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: Gross, very, very gross indeed.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_00: Disgusting.
• 25:48
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so I had a little bit more on here.
• 25:51
  SPEAKER_00: I had a whole nother article.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'll still post both articles, but I have ran out of time, even with just those 10.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_00: Um, there's a few more extra here, which is great.
• 26:01
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, let's see, I'll just say what the overall things are yearning or slow burn anticipation, being present with your date, which is why wouldn't you?
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_00: Emotional intelligence over chemistry, yes.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_00: A lot of people putting emotional talent.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_00: How do you judge that?
• 26:16
  SPEAKER_00: I would like to know.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_00: How do you judge that, Camster?
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, prioritizing vulnerability, in-person connection versus the dating app, of course, allowing the connection to have a healthy space, transparent echalance dating.
• 26:27
  SPEAKER_00: So intentionality, yay.
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_00: Uh, all right.
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_00: So, what do you think about the dating trends?
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_00: Are they getting better?
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_00: Are they getting worse?
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_00: That Shreking one is kind of bullshit.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: That's fucking crazy.
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_00: But as with most trends, you gotta have the positive with the negative in general, as with life uh at all.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_00: So I tell you, camster, I'll leave you some words of wisdom from Julius Marquis, the host of this podcast.
• 26:56
  SPEAKER_00: You can make mistakes and you can learn from the mistakes.
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, that's my words of wisdom.
• 27:02
  SPEAKER_00: Make mistakes and then learn from them.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_00: Chalots with it.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's all for now.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_00: I gotta finish packing to go on this trip with the adult stuff going on, and hopefully, I will have the energy to give y'all a post-rap.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe I'll record one of these while I'm there, and I'll put that out when I come back.
• 27:24
  SPEAKER_00: We are fingers crossing that the energy will be there, and I won't be like sick because you know that concrud every single time happens.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_00: You even hear it a little bit now.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_00: Pre crud.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: Great, pre con crud.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_00: It's amazing.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_00: All right, we here are around the kiki campfire.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm Julius Marquis, the glorious host of this podcast, and that's all for now.
• 27:45
  SPEAKER_00: Catch you later.
• 27:47
  SPEAKER_00: Hello.