Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap: Don't Touch Granny's Peaches
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: It's Brook and Jeffrey in the morning. And there's nothing
- 0:02Speaker 1: that warms my heart more than getting an email from
- 0:05Speaker 1: a listener saying my mom is officially a grumpy old person.
- 0:09Speaker 1: Will it feels good to get a message like that.
- 0:13Speaker 1: So today we call a woman who's upset that her
- 0:16Speaker 1: local grocery store moved an item. Yes her, they moved
- 0:21Speaker 1: it a few miles over and she could not find it.
- 0:25Speaker 1: So I'm gonna call to make it right in your
- 0:28Speaker 1: phone tap right now. Hello, Hi, man, I'm sorry to
- 0:37Speaker 1: bother you at this hour. My name is Martin Martin Needlesworth.
- 0:40Speaker 1: I work over at the grocery store on forty second Street.
- 0:45Speaker 2: Why are you calling so early?
- 0:47Speaker 1: Well, again, I apologize for that, man, but you're a
- 0:50Speaker 1: regular shopper here.
- 0:51Speaker 2: What time it is?
- 0:54Speaker 1: I do? I just I figured you would be awake
- 0:58Speaker 1: at this hour.
- 1:00Speaker 2: Well I am now.
- 1:01Speaker 1: I apologize. But when you were in the store the
- 1:04Speaker 1: other day, the cashier at the register told me that
- 1:07Speaker 1: you were upset about a certain item canned peaches.
- 1:11Speaker 2: Can what peaches?
- 1:13Speaker 1: I'm sorry you're going you may have to speak up
- 1:15Speaker 1: a little bit, ma'am. I'm having a hard time hearing.
- 1:17Speaker 2: You canned peaches.
- 1:20Speaker 1: Oh, okay, got it, peaches. I thought you were saying
- 1:26Speaker 1: canned beaches like sand on the beach. I was like, well,
- 1:28Speaker 1: I don't think we sell that peaches. Peaches right, got you.
- 1:33Speaker 2: They're always in Aisle six, But then you moved them
- 1:37Speaker 2: to Ale eight.
- 1:39Speaker 1: I'm sorry, ma'am, why are you Why are you screaming?
- 1:42Speaker 2: I'm not I'm not screaming. You said you couldn't hear me. Well,
- 1:47Speaker 2: now I have to walk clear across the store for
- 1:50Speaker 2: fruit cup and you didn't announce you were moving it.
- 1:54Speaker 1: You just did it. Okay, ma'am. I can tell you
- 1:56Speaker 1: might be a little bit frustrated here.
- 1:58Speaker 2: I am frustrated here. It took me twenty minutes to
- 2:01Speaker 2: find peaches. I don't have that kind of time.
- 2:05Speaker 1: You know what, ma'am. I agree with you. People don't
- 2:07Speaker 1: have that kind of time to look one aisle over.
- 2:10Speaker 1: You shouldn't be put through that sort of struggle.
- 2:12Speaker 2: Thank you, Thank you.
- 2:13Speaker 1: Right, So, what I'm gonna do is I'm just gonna
- 2:15Speaker 1: put you through to our store manager and he can
- 2:18Speaker 1: explain the new peaches relocation strategy for you.
- 2:21Speaker 2: I don't need to talk to him about strategy.
- 2:23Speaker 1: I don't need strategy. I think you'll feel a lot better, ma'am.
- 2:26Speaker 1: Just please hold stategy my peaches.
- 2:30Speaker 2: I went in there for peaches, I left without peaches.
- 2:36Speaker 1: Hello. Hello, hi, mam, I'm back and uh I just
- 2:42Speaker 1: spoke with our manager.
- 2:44Speaker 2: Why did you talk to him? You didn't need to
- 2:46Speaker 2: talk to him. I was talking to you.
- 2:48Speaker 1: The thing is he is cleaning a laundry detergent on
- 2:51Speaker 1: Aisle thirteen at the moment, so he couldn't come to
- 2:53Speaker 1: the phone there. You're right, that's not important. The good
- 2:56Speaker 1: news is he explained his canned fruit Synergy initiative to me,
- 3:00Speaker 1: so I can forward that along to you.
- 3:01Speaker 2: No, open your ears. I don't give allergy.
- 3:05Speaker 1: Oh you're talking to me.
- 3:07Speaker 2: Who else would I be talking to.
- 3:09Speaker 1: I don't know if someone's around you and you may
- 3:11Speaker 1: be yelling at them.
- 3:12Speaker 2: No, I'm yelling at you, ma'am.
- 3:15Speaker 1: Uh, I'm just gonna ask do you have a cell phone?
- 3:19Speaker 2: Some kind of idiot? What do you think I'm talking
- 3:22Speaker 2: to you on? Oh?
- 3:23Speaker 1: Sorry, I just considering the whole canned peaches situation and
- 3:26Speaker 1: the fact that you paid with a check, I just
- 3:28Speaker 1: thought maybe this was a landline.
- 3:30Speaker 2: No, it's a cell phone.
- 3:32Speaker 1: Okay, got it?
- 3:33Speaker 2: Care about any of that. I just want to speak
- 3:35Speaker 2: to somebody about keeping the peaches.
- 3:39Speaker 1: Well, that's what I'm actually ma'am. There is a solution
- 3:42Speaker 1: for this. I just need you to download a canned
- 3:45Speaker 1: peaches GPS tracker on your phone right now.
- 3:47Speaker 2: I don't want to do that.
- 3:50Speaker 1: Well, you'll need to, man, because we're introducing new smart
- 3:53Speaker 1: cans with GPS tracking so that you'll be able to Well,
- 3:58Speaker 1: that way, you'll be able to track the peaches no
- 4:00Speaker 1: matter where they are in the store.
- 4:02Speaker 2: Leave them in aisle six skips. That's what I know.
- 4:06Speaker 2: Do you read the peaches for twenty freaking years? Can
- 4:11Speaker 2: I hear you? No? You don't.
- 4:14Speaker 1: It's sounding like no smart cans for you. You don't want
- 4:17Speaker 1: to have the GPS peach tracker.
- 4:19Speaker 2: That's as an Okay.
- 4:21Speaker 1: Would it make you feel better if I punched myself
- 4:23Speaker 1: in the face right now?
- 4:25Speaker 2: Oh? Go sucking woah.
- 4:28Speaker 1: I don't know if I can do that on company time.
- 4:30Speaker 2: But you've got a smart mouth on you, and I
- 4:34Speaker 2: know that you're with me. Like it. Don't you like it? No,
- 4:39Speaker 2: I'm going to another store where I know where the
- 4:42Speaker 2: peaches are, ma'am.
- 4:44Speaker 1: That's totally. You're right to do that, but it's at
- 4:46Speaker 1: this point I should let you know that this is
- 4:48Speaker 1: a prank phone call set up by your daughter, Cindy. What.
- 4:53Speaker 1: I'm actually a radio host and you're on the show
- 4:56Speaker 1: right now called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.
- 4:58Speaker 2: I don't care about your fancy technology or whatever the
- 5:01Speaker 2: hell you've got going on to at least things where they.
- 5:04Speaker 1: Were, ma'am. This is a prank call. I'm not with
- 5:07Speaker 1: the grocery store. I'm only doing this because your daughter
- 5:10Speaker 1: said you got frustrated that they'd move stuff around.
- 5:13Speaker 2: They moved to peaches.
- 5:14Speaker 1: Yes, and that's why Cindy asked us if we could
- 5:16Speaker 1: have a little bit of fun with you and make
- 5:18Speaker 1: you laugh.
- 5:18Speaker 2: Hopefully get her on the phone.
- 5:21Speaker 1: Well I can't do that, but I do hope that
- 5:23Speaker 1: you have the best day possible.
- 5:25Speaker 2: And I have the best day when I get my teeches.
- 5:32Speaker 2: Every morning was food Tabs weekday mornings on the twenties,
- 5:36Speaker 2: Brooking Jeffrey in the Morning,