Latest / Impact Ready / 189. Breaking Out of Irrational Thinking
Transcript
- 0:02Welcome to Impact Ready, a show dedicated to helping you elevate
- 0:06your impact in the world. I'm Steph Safra, your host.
- 0:09Let's explore the power of showing up with intention and
- 0:12energy each day. This is for those who seek to
- 0:15make life truly meaningful. Get ready for impact.
- 0:22Hey team, welcome to the Impact Ready podcast.
- 0:26I am coming to you live from my new studio office.
- 0:32Actually what we did is moved my office downstairs into the
- 0:36basement and built a little wall that has acoustic panels up so
- 0:40it sounds a little bit better for recording content and
- 0:43recording a podcast. So I hope you enjoy.
- 0:47Hi, I just spent the last five minutes recording and noticed
- 0:51just a few seconds ago that I hadn't plugged my microphone in.
- 0:55Everything is sort of haphazardly put together.
- 0:59It's not all finished yet and got to make sure everything's
- 1:02plugged in before I hit play. So here we go.
- 1:05Today in this podcast, we are going to talk about managing
- 1:10irrational thinking. And the reason for this episode
- 1:13is because I think this is something that gets in the way
- 1:15for so many people. Not only do my clients talk
- 1:19about this, but my friends and my family will speak about this
- 1:22as well. It's it's part of being human,
- 1:24just managing. When we start to spiral or when
- 1:27we start to go down that drain of negative thinking, we have to
- 1:31be able to pull ourselves out. And I want to share a, a list of
- 1:35a few things that I think are really helpful, stuff that I
- 1:38have used with clients, stuff that I've used in my own life.
- 1:41And that's why I feel like this actually does move the needle.
- 1:43It's not just another strategy, it's actually something that you
- 1:46can put into practice and see a change.
- 1:49So let's look at this first through the lens of, you know,
- 1:53we have to learn to differentiate between what we
- 1:56are thinking and what's actually happening because that's really
- 1:59kind of the definition of irrational thinking.
- 2:02It's not necessarily rooted in reality and it can run away with
- 2:06us. And so these next 5 or 6 things
- 2:10that I want to talk about are going to help us differentiate
- 2:13between what's actually happening and what our thoughts
- 2:17are telling us. The first thing that is really
- 2:21helpful is understanding that we can't believe everything we
- 2:24think. And I know that might sound
- 2:26silly or cliche or really obvious, but the reality is we
- 2:32don't often remember that when we are in the throes of a
- 2:36negative spiral thinking, we start to believe every single
- 2:40thought that crosses our mind. I'm not good enough, I'm not
- 2:44smart enough. I've never been going to be able
- 2:46to get this done. Nobody appreciates me.
- 2:48Whatever it might be. It's very hard to remember in
- 2:52those moments. You can't believe everything you
- 2:54think. So we have to root ourselves in
- 2:58this fact that we have negative stories, saboteur voices, inner
- 3:04critics that are historical. They're not necessarily rooted
- 3:08in any sort of reality. They're just old thinking
- 3:11patterns developed from our lived experiences years and
- 3:14years ago, and reinforced because we repeatedly think
- 3:18those things over and over again.
- 3:20We also are often lacking context in a situation in the
- 3:24world. We don't have all the education
- 3:26around something. We are biased inherently, and so
- 3:31we can't believe everything we think because we're not an
- 3:33accurate source. And to be able to remember that
- 3:37gives us some calm in the storm when our brain starts to take
- 3:40over and take us down a path that we don't really want to go
- 3:43down. The second thing that's really
- 3:46helpful is to understand that your Physiology influences your
- 3:50thinking. Now, what does this actually
- 3:51mean? It means that when you're tired,
- 3:55your saboteur voices get a lot louder.
- 3:58You're less resilient to stress. You can't think as clearly.
- 4:02You just don't have the same groundedness that you would if
- 4:07you weren't tired, hungry, dehydrated, hormonal, fatigued,
- 4:12whatever it is, you have to remember that your Physiology
- 4:16will have an impact on your thinking and you have to take
- 4:20care of yourself. You have to make sure that your
- 4:23tank is full, that you are making time for rest and
- 4:26recovery or it's much easier to go down those spirals of
- 4:30thinking, negative thoughts and irrational thoughts when you are
- 4:34burned out and fatigued. Remember that.
- 4:37That is so important and we forget that because oftentimes
- 4:42we think more is more, more work is more, more achievement is
- 4:47more, and more deadlines is more.
- 4:49It's not. Oftentimes we have to
- 4:52createspace for ourselves to rest and recover, fill up our
- 4:56tank. And that way our Physiology will
- 4:58perform the way we want it to and our brain can perform in the
- 5:04way that we want it to. This is probably one of the
- 5:07things that people forget the most because many times we lose
- 5:10our awareness that the mental and the physical are
- 5:13interconnected and interdependent.
- 5:15So that's number two. The third one is to name what's
- 5:18happening when you are experiencing irrational
- 5:21thinking. Name what's happening.
- 5:23What's the feeling? Is it jealousy, anger,
- 5:26resentment, sadness, grief? Name the feeling and then see if
- 5:31you can get to the deeper root of it.
- 5:33What has me feeling this way? Am I afraid, am I deeply sad?
- 5:38Am I feeling insecure? Am I feeling like my safety's at
- 5:42risk? Whatever it might be, understand
- 5:44what is the feeling and what is the root of that.
- 5:47When you can start to understand that more deeply, you can break
- 5:51out of that pattern, that superhighway, that rutted neuro
- 5:55pathway of irrational thinking. I just had a client say to me,
- 5:58Steph, I need help with these feelings that I'm experiencing
- 6:02of jealousy and comparison. I have these goals and I know
- 6:06that I won't be able to get there if I'm in these patterns
- 6:08of thinking. And so we had her name, the
- 6:11feeling, and then we had her get to the root.
- 6:14And for her in that example, the root of her jealousy was that
- 6:17she had a deep desire to have what this other person had.
- 6:21And she also had a fear that it wasn't going to happen, which is
- 6:24so common with jealousy in comparison.
- 6:27But it was really helpful and it broke her out of that pattern of
- 6:30irrational thinking. Let me pause here for a second.
- 6:36If you're listening and thinking I'm capable of more or this is
- 6:41the level I want to operate at, this is for you.
- 6:44I work privately with a small number of high performing
- 6:47leaders who are ready to elevate how they show up in their
- 6:50business and in their lives. This isn't motivational
- 6:53coaching. It's precision work.
- 6:55We refine your energy, strengthen your ownership, and
- 6:58eliminate inconsistency so your impact becomes undeniable.
- 7:03If you're ready for that level of growth, book a private call
- 7:06through the link in the show notes.
- 7:08We'll see if it's a fit. All right, back to the episode.
- 7:16The next one is to level set expectations.
- 7:20Often times we are so wildly inaccurate with our expectations
- 7:25of things, whether it's how fast something should happen or how
- 7:29good something should be or how someone else should behave.
- 7:33And this gets in the way of us being able to see a clear
- 7:37reality. And then we start to spiral.
- 7:40We start to have irrational thinking about so many different
- 7:44things because our expectations are incorrect.
- 7:48We have to be able to look at things with a clear eye and see
- 7:53it for what it is. The classic example that I give
- 7:56all the time is in my company, Optimize You.
- 7:59In our signature program, Next Level Nutrition, we have so many
- 8:02clients who come to the program and want to reduce their
- 8:05inflammation and lose weight, but their expectations about how
- 8:08fast that should happen or what type of results they should be
- 8:11getting, they are unrealistic and they are incorrect.
- 8:15They're not even possible oftentimes.
- 8:18And so we have to level set those expectations so that we
- 8:21can stop the irrational thinking that people experience when
- 8:25they're not getting the outcome they hope for.
- 8:27Really look for this in your life team.
- 8:29Look and see what your expectations are with your work,
- 8:33with your relationships, with your marriage, with your kids.
- 8:36And if you can alter them so they're a little bit more
- 8:40realistic, I guarantee that is going to help you stop some of
- 8:44these repeated patterns of irrational or negative thinking.
- 8:49OK, next way to be irrational thinking is to get moving.
- 8:54Literally get your body into motion, whatever that might look
- 8:57like. It can be working out, walking,
- 9:00yoga, strength training, dancing, just standing up and
- 9:05shaking your body for 30 seconds.
- 9:07All that stuff counts because when your body is in motion, it
- 9:11creates momentum and you can change your state.
- 9:15The power of changing your state is incredible to break the
- 9:19pattern of irrational thinking and get you out of the spiral.
- 9:23I always tell people action beats anxiety, and sometimes
- 9:27that action is just getting out of your house for a walk or
- 9:31leaving the office for 10 minutes and going around the
- 9:33block. Action beats anxiety, movement
- 9:37creates momentum, and that stuff breaks the patterns of faulty,
- 9:43irrational thinking. It gets you out of it.
- 9:46OK, last one for today and this one might seem a little bit
- 9:51cliche, a little bit obvious, but I'm going to say it anyway
- 9:54because I've really felt the power of this.
- 9:57Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
- 10:00My coach said this to me about a month ago, and so I've been
- 10:03thinking about a lot and I've really deeply started to
- 10:07understand the power of accepting that discomfort is
- 10:11part of the game, it's part of the plan.
- 10:14I asked my clients often, do you want to be on the merry go round
- 10:18that just goes round and round and does the same thing every
- 10:21single day of your life? Or do you want your life to be
- 10:24the ride of a roller coaster where there's ups and downs and
- 10:27some parts are scary and other parts are exhilarating?
- 10:30Which ride do you choose? Every single client chooses the
- 10:34roller coaster because we as humans don't want to be on the
- 10:38merry go round. It's boring, it's not
- 10:40challenging. We start to feel stagnant.
- 10:43Most people don't want that life.
- 10:45So many people want the variety of experiences that you might
- 10:50have on a roller coaster. They want the thrill, they want
- 10:52the emotions. They want to feel something.
- 10:55So we have to accept that discomfort is part of that
- 10:58process. Life is always going to throw
- 11:00challenges at us. We know this.
- 11:03And so if we can get comfortable with being uncomfortable, we
- 11:06don't get thrown for a loop every time something happens to
- 11:09us. We don't get thrown into a
- 11:12spiral of negative thinking every time we face a challenge
- 11:16or we have a hard day. We don't fly off the handle when
- 11:20something goes wrong. And we don't get stuck in this
- 11:24loop of irrational thinking when something doesn't work out for
- 11:28us. This is really powerful to get
- 11:32comfortable with. Being uncomfortable is such an
- 11:34amazing tool to give you a little bit more peace and be
- 11:38able to step back and objectively look at your life
- 11:40and say, OK, I'm in a low point right now.
- 11:43This is normal. This is part of the game.
- 11:46I signed up for this, I said yes to it.
- 11:49This is just one of the dips that I'm experiencing.
- 11:52And ultimately I'm going to come back up again.
- 11:55That perspective is so valuable. And so despite the fact that it
- 12:00seems a little bit cliche and a little bit obvious, it's
- 12:03probably one of the most helpful things that I've really
- 12:06integrated in my life and that my clients have reported being
- 12:11helpful for them. So those are 5 actually, I think
- 12:16probably six ways that you can help manage irrational thoughts,
- 12:21irrational thinking, and keep yourself out of that spiral.
- 12:25I wouldn't even limit it to that.
- 12:27I would say that if you can practice these six things, you
- 12:31will feel more peace in your life.
- 12:33You will feel more ease. You will feel more joy because
- 12:37you'll have more bandwidth, mental bandwidth to just live
- 12:41and be and be present. We can acknowledge that it's
- 12:44always a work in progress. It's just something to be
- 12:46practicing every day and I hope it helps.
- 12:50I truly believe that we can break some of our old negative
- 12:53patterns of thinking and build new neural pathways.
- 12:55I see it happen all the time. We just have to put a little bit
- 12:58of effort into it. So that's all for today.
- 13:02Thank you for being here. I hope this serves you.
- 13:04And as always, thank you for being ready to Impact Team.
- 13:08Thanks for listening to Impact Ready.
- 13:10I hope today's episode inspired you to own your impact and
- 13:13recognize that you are powerful. By elevating our energy and
- 13:17awareness, we can create exponential change in this life.
- 13:21If you enjoyed today's insights, share them with a friend and
- 13:23subscribe to the show for more. I truly appreciate you.
- 13:26Thanks again for being here.