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Phone Tap: Colonoscopy Add-Ons · Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: It's almost time for your prank call. It's Brooke and
• 0:01
  Speaker 1: Jeffrey in the morning. And there's a guy who's going
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: in for his first ever colonoscopy. Lucky son of a gun.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: I wish someone would knock me out and probe me.
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: But this is all besides the case. Because this dude's
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: having some reservations about it. That's why Brooke's going to
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: call as the medical assistant and reassure him this isn't
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: your father's colonoscopy.
• 0:25
  Speaker 2: No way.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: Things have changed and the future is now. Cannot wait
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: to tell him about it all in your phone tab
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: right now.
• 0:35
  Speaker 2: Brooke and Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: Hello?
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: Hi, is this Matthew?
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: This is Max calling.
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: I'm calling from North. Digestive Health Center. I'm one of
• 0:48
  Speaker 2: the medical assistants here.
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: Oh, oh, hi.
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: Hi, hi. My name's Dorothy Dimidome.
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: Dorothy?
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm just confirming you have a colonoscopy scheduled with
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: us tomorrow, right?
• 1:01
  Speaker 3: 245? Huh? Yes, yeah, I do. Great, great.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: So now that we've confirmed your appointment, I just have
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: a list of add-ons you may want to take advantage of.
• 1:14
  Speaker 3: Sorry, add-ons?
• 1:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right. Just added service. Maybe you could think
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: of it as a bonus feature.
• 1:22
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm not sure what add-ons mean when it comes
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: to a colonoscopy.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: There are so many options nowadays. Your first potential add-on,
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: this would be an extra $ 30, okay? That would be scent.
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: We've got lavender, root beer, or creamy ranch.
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: Aww. What do you mean?
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: What do you mean, what do I mean? Don't you
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: want to smell good?
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: Oh. Ooh, you mean like that would be inside me?
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: Think of it like this. It's like having a little
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: tree car freshener working downstairs in your pants.
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: I've never heard of that.
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, people love it. You wouldn't believe the compliments I
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: get on my behind.
• 2:03
  Speaker 3: All the time.
• 2:05
  Speaker 2: I pick root beer. Very popular.
• 2:08
  Speaker 3: I'm probably going to pass on the scent part.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: Okay, so now for only $ 35 extra, we can add
• 2:17
  Speaker 2: a little bit of Superglide.
• 2:20
  Speaker 3: I don't even know if I want to know about that.
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: Just imagine doing your business after your procedure, and it's
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: going to feel like Superman shooting to the moon.
• 2:30
  Speaker 3: I don't even understand what that means. I think I'm
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: going to pass on that one, too.
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: You've heard of dropping the kids off at the pool, right?
• 2:37
  Speaker 2: This is hurling them down the water slide.
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: Wait, isn't that what... The purpose of this is to
• 2:45
  Speaker 3: get all the kids out of those.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: I don't think that's the saying, Matthew. But I will
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: tell you, if you want to add it on, we
• 2:55
  Speaker 2: will glide that ramp up. Just code it for your satisfaction.
• 2:59
  Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I'm good. I think we just play it
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: safe here because I'm already freaked out being this is
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: my first time getting a colonoscopy.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, your first time? Then this is a perfect add-on
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: for you. It's similar to a theme park. We offer
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: on-ride photos.
• 3:16
  Speaker 3: What? What does that even mean?
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: Well, that way you can take home a picture to
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: remember the experience by.
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: Oh, okay, lady, this is some kind of joke. This
• 3:24
  Speaker 3: has to be, right?
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: Oh, maybe you don't realize because you haven't done it.
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: You're asleep for the procedure. So how else are you
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: going to commemorate your first time?
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: I don't want that. Who would ever want that?
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: Would you like two 5x8s or three 4x6s?
• 3:38
  Speaker 3: Lady, look, I'm sorry. I am already freaking out here.
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: I really don't want a picture of myself getting a colonoscopy.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: It's not yourself. Your face isn't going to be in
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: the photo.
• 3:49
  Speaker 3: Wait, what? You're just going to, what, put a picture
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: of my hole in the frame? What are you talking about?
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: We don't provide the frames. That's up to the customer.
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: Okay, look, this whole call is out of control.
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: I like what you did with that whole reference. That's funny.
• 4:08
  Speaker 3: What? No. What are you talking about? No. Just a colonoscopy.
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: 2.45 p.m. That's it. Okay.
• 4:16
  Speaker 2: You're getting a little upset. So free of charge. You
• 4:18
  Speaker 2: know what? We're going to throw in a prank phone call.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: How does that sound?
• 4:22
  Speaker 3: Look, I don't want anything. I definitely don't want... Wait. Really?
• 4:25
  Speaker 2: Because your wife, Kinsley, she really wanted this prank phone call.
• 4:30
  Speaker 3: My... Oh my God.
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: This is actually from the radio show, Brooke and Jeffrey
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: in the morning. And your wife emailed us.
• 4:38
  Speaker 3: Oh, my God. I was freaking out when you started
• 4:43
  Speaker 3: talking about, like, the slip and slide and stuff. Oh,
• 4:47
  Speaker 3: my God.
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: We just thought you would want something to remember it by.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: That's all. I mean, it doesn't have to be the picture.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: We could go back to root beer. Ooh, or creamy ranch.
• 4:56
  Speaker 3: Yum. Yeah, I think I'll go with the root beer
• 4:59
  Speaker 3: over the creamy ranch.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: Broken Jeffrey's phone taps on the 20s.