Latest / The Dr. Sarah Hensley Show / Episode 28, Season 2: Running on Empty: Understanding Emotional Burnout

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Episode 28, Season 2: Running on Empty: Understanding Emotional Burnout · The Dr. Sarah Hensley Show

• 0:11
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Love Dog Podcast. I'm your co host
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Rayna Butcher here with our host, doctor Sarah Hensley, the owner, founder,
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: and CEO of the love Doc relationship coaching services. You
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: can find her at the lovedog dot com or on
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: any social media at doctor Sarah Hensley. Hey, Hey, what's
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: going on?
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: Oh? You know, getting ready to talk about emotional burnout
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: because I'm currently there.
• 0:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I think we both are a little bit. Not
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: because of the podcast either, Guys. We love the podcast.
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: It's our favorite thing to do. But it's a there's
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: just been a lot.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: There's been a lot. And I hit a deer last night,
• 0:45
  Speaker 2: and a wall and a wall hympathetically speaking, hpathetically, I
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: hit a wall. We are in the midst of cheer
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: competition season, and if anybody out there has a daughter
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: in competition cheered you just know, if you know, you know,
• 1:00
  Speaker 2: it is so much and it's wonderful and it's so
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: fun to watch my girls and watch them succeed far
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: more than I did when I was a cheerleader. And
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: it's also really cool to watch them just sort of
• 1:15
  Speaker 2: do what I did. You know, my daughter was at
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: the same competition I was at twenty five years ago exactly.
• 1:20
  Speaker 2: It is really cool last week, and so it's like
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  Speaker 2: I remember being there. It's like, you know, Ohio, Kentucky,
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: Tennessee Regional, you know, UCA Regional, and it was like
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: just flashback, and there's something kind of yeah, very nostalgic
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: about that and just watching her out there and being
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: like I remember being on that mat. And I want
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: my kids to always just be better than me. And
• 1:45
  Speaker 2: so I never had any private lessons or you know,
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: I was like learning to tumble in my yard with
• 1:50
  Speaker 2: my friend Jill, you know, falling on my head on
• 1:53
  Speaker 2: the hard ground. And here my daughters go to like
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: the best cheer gym in Lexington, and I'm blessed to
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: be able to send them there because I want them
• 2:02
  Speaker 2: to be better than me. I want them to have
• 2:04
  Speaker 2: opportunities that I didn't have, you know. And and it's
• 2:08
  Speaker 2: beautiful to watch them grow and succeed and to feel confident.
• 2:12
  Speaker 2: And I'm so blessed to be able to do that
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: for them. But the amount of energy and effort it
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: takes just to get them where they need to go,
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  Speaker 2: you know, my older daughters doing high school cheery, doing
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: their own competitions. We just booked Disney National. They got
• 2:27
  Speaker 2: their bid to Nationals. We just booked Disney. The amount
• 2:30
  Speaker 2: that it costs to take our family to Disney, literally,
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: I almost threw up in a bucket, like when I
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: booked that, and I'm just like, and then my other daughter,
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: you know, she's got Worlds and Summit and all these
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: out of state things, and so I got to book
• 2:47
  Speaker 2: all the travel and I'm just like, how are we
• 2:49
  Speaker 2: going to do this?
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah? I don't know how are.
• 2:51
  Speaker 2: We even doing it now? And that's just two out
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: of four, all.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Right, And that's on top. But that's on top of
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: running this business.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: Running a business, coaching clients, trying to give everything I
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: can to every client that comes across my desk.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: And creating free value for your communities.
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: I try to create a lot of free value, go
• 3:09
  Speaker 2: on lives, do free webinars, this podcast, this podcast, everything,
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: and just running this personal brand that is totally tied
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: to just my face and my performance and my energy.
• 3:21
  Speaker 2: And you know, we just kind of had to come
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: to Jesus meeting with like our strategic marketing partner where
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: it's like, yeah, the things we're doing are wonderful for
• 3:32
  Speaker 2: our community, but I've hit a wall.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: I can't, I can't scream into a pillow.
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: I'm screaming into a pillow because every I just realized.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: I realized this morning that I am never alone.
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: I could not imagine never ever, ever, because my alone
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  Speaker 1: time is so.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: Sacred alone And so it's caused this emotional burnout, which
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: is what this episode is about. And last night hitting
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: the deer was not my fault. There's nothing I could do.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: We're in Kentucky, guys, it's rutting season. If people don't
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  Speaker 2: know what rutting season is, it is basically where the
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: male deer, the bucks are. Their sex hormones are so
• 4:12
  Speaker 2: high because they're in mating season. They will one buck
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  Speaker 2: will impregnate about forty does like during rutting season. So
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  Speaker 2: and they're so overpopulated. This one ran out of a neighborhood.
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: It ran I was. I was driving, not in a
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  Speaker 2: wooded area, I was driving past the neighborhood.
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  Speaker 1: Well, I had a buck in my backyard a couple
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  Speaker 1: of years ago, and I live in a very very
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  Speaker 1: like close house subdivision.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, so, so the the bucks are in emotional burnout.
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  Speaker 2: Do to have another kid? But basically what happens to
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: these bucks is their sex hormones get so high that
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  Speaker 2: it makes them crazy and it makes them if they
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: can't impregnate a dough, it makes them so like they
• 5:00
  Speaker 2: have to run. They have to run to burn off.
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  Speaker 1: And that's what we feel like doing, Yeah, just running
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  Speaker 1: and never stop.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, they have to. They have to literally just sprint
• 5:10
  Speaker 2: so much to burn off some adrenaline, adrenaline and excess.
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  Speaker 2: I don't know if it's testosterone or what they have. Sure,
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  Speaker 2: being a I'm not a dear like biologist, I don't know,
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  Speaker 2: but basically they have high alostolic load, all astolic load.
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: So that's why I want to talk about today, which
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: is just emotional burnout. And I have some notes on
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: my phone because I'm not at the point where I
• 5:35
  Speaker 2: can have it all in my head right now. So
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: essentially we talk about just stress overload. And it's not
• 5:44
  Speaker 2: just that everything you're doing is stressful per se, but
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: it's having to have your attention and energy on something,
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  Speaker 2: so a regulated nervous system. And Dana Dozzie talks a
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  Speaker 2: lot about that, and we love to reference Dana Dozzie.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: She was a guest on this podcast. She's great at
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: every video she puts out, I just like hang on
• 6:04
  Speaker 2: it because I'm like, my gosh, you are so right
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: and intelligent, and the way that she breaks things down
• 6:11
  Speaker 2: is beautiful, and it's all from the science. It's all
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: things that I've learned as well, and some things I
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: haven't learned, some new things She's taught me some new things.
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  Speaker 2: So allostatic load is the amount of energy and effort
• 6:26
  Speaker 2: that we have to put out, and it's the amount
• 6:29
  Speaker 2: of stress resources that we have to accommodate that. So,
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  Speaker 2: if you think of your nervous system, there's two analogies
• 6:39
  Speaker 2: that are very highly prevalent in the literature. There's the
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: muscle analogy and then there's the gas tank analogy. So
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: if you use the gas tank analogy, and they're beautifully parallel,
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  Speaker 2: it's like some of us have very small gas tanks,
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  Speaker 2: some of us have very big gas tanks, and when
• 6:56
  Speaker 2: we work on our nervous system, we grow the size
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: of our gas tank. And so what I teach people
• 7:01
  Speaker 2: to do is to grow the size of their gas tank.
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  Speaker 2: But it doesn't matter how big your gas tank is,
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  Speaker 2: if what is siphoning gas from that gas tank ultimately
• 7:11
  Speaker 2: is going to end up depleting it. Right, So the
• 7:13
  Speaker 2: mileage you have to burn it's directly proportional to how
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: much gas you have before you run out. And so
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: if you have to drive one thousand miles, but your
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: tank is only big enough for two hundred miles, like
• 7:27
  Speaker 2: you're going to burn out at two hundred miles, right,
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  Speaker 2: And so I have a very big gas tank. I've
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: created that for myself for the work that I have done.
• 7:36
  Speaker 2: But now the amount of mileage I have to drive
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  Speaker 2: is now exceeding my gas tank. So what I've noticed
• 7:43
  Speaker 2: is that I have to regulate more often. I'm required
• 7:46
  Speaker 2: to use my tools more than I was having to
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  Speaker 2: use them. And two, when I use them, they are
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: taking longer to refill my gas tank than before. And
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  Speaker 2: so those were my signals. And I'm feeling it in
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  Speaker 2: my body, and I'm feeling it emotionally. And how do
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  Speaker 2: I feel it. I feel it in physical symptoms. I
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: feel it in more thoughts that are like negative and
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  Speaker 2: sort of fed up. I've noticed it in moving through
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  Speaker 2: life in a way where I'm not as present as
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  Speaker 2: I was. That's a really regulated nervous system. And this
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  Speaker 2: is how you can tell people. Always ask me, how
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  Speaker 2: do you tell if you're regulated or not. Here's how
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  Speaker 2: you tell. A regulated nervous system moves through the world
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  Speaker 2: slowly and connected to the present and fully connected to
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  Speaker 2: your body. So being connected to your body means you're
• 8:43
  Speaker 2: connected to the present. Because being connected to the body
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  Speaker 2: means you're noticing your senses right and so what you
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  Speaker 2: notice your sense is in the present. So the colors
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  Speaker 2: feel alive. You know, you can feel the way this
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: chair feels underneath your body right now. You notice noises
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  Speaker 2: in the background. You're mindful of your words and your tone.
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  Speaker 2: You are really absorbing what someone else is telling you.
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  Speaker 2: And so for a lot of my clients who are
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  Speaker 2: very chronically dysregulated and emotionally burnt out over their relationships,
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  Speaker 2: they are very much struggling to learn tools and use tools.
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  Speaker 2: So a large part of what I have to do
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  Speaker 2: with my clients is give them ways to be reg
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  Speaker 2: and that's why the group is so good. And that's
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  Speaker 2: what people don't realize that therapy and sort of like
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  Speaker 2: a one on one situation can actually be way more
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  Speaker 2: dysregulating for you, and that inhibits your ability to absorb
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  Speaker 2: what you're learning, and it just becomes a space where
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  Speaker 2: you feel soothed by the therapist in the moment, but
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  Speaker 2: then the minute you walk out of there, you're right
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  Speaker 2: back into the dysregulated state because you're not actually building
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: your bigger gas tank, which is building your capacity. And
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  Speaker 2: so people come to me so often. I've been in
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  Speaker 2: therapy for fifteen years. Why am I in such a
• 10:14
  Speaker 2: mess with my relationship? How did I get here? Nearly
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  Speaker 2: the majority of my clients, by when they land at
• 10:22
  Speaker 2: my desk, have been in therapy. And I know it
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: sounds like I'm just knocking therapy, but I think we
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  Speaker 2: have to start realizing that therapy is not giving people
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: what they need anymore. One I used to I ran
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: a program for training clinical psychologists. I was the program
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: director of PSIDPHD. I had so I was like operations, right,
• 10:48
  Speaker 2: I had my hand and everything I do what you
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: do for the love dog. I was operations. I was
• 10:54
  Speaker 2: teaching classes. I was making sure people had access to
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: get good practicums, good internships. I was making sure people
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: got through the program with and let them know, you know,
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: hooked up with their advisors, so they are making sure
• 11:10
  Speaker 2: that they had the credits that they need, making sure
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: that they were tracking their practical hours, making sure they
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: you know, we're turning in their internship evaluations. It was
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: just operations. But I saw that program compared to the
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: PhD program I graduated from fifteen years ago. Light like
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: night and day. Different light and dark. Because what has
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: happened and we can trace it all the way up
• 11:37
  Speaker 2: to these accrediting bodies is we're having to triage people
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: because people are standing on the ledge trying to jump
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: off and end their life. Literally, like suicide rates are up,
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: especially after COVID man suicide rates in the America went
• 11:52
  Speaker 2: through the freaking roof drug overdoses way up, alcohol abuse
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: way up, way up. We're falling apart over here. And
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: of course these programs are like, okay, well, we need
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: to turn people out faster. But when you turn people
• 12:10
  Speaker 2: out faster and you're cutting their training, they aren't as capable.
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: And I don't mean to put people down that are
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: like in a one year master's program. Right now, the
• 12:22
  Speaker 2: system is broken that you could be the best therapist
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: that had a one year master's training ever, but that's
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: still not the same as somebody who went through a
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: three year program. It's not the same it's not the same.
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: You weren't exposed to as much, and so they can't
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: deliver as much for you. So I'm not blaming therapy
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  Speaker 2: as a technique. I'm saying I've seen a system drastically
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: cut its ability to train people.
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: It's falling behind.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: It's falling behind because we are getting worse. And then
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: if we are getting worse, we have to ask ourselves
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: why are we getting worse? I think there's a boatloads
• 13:03
  Speaker 2: of reasons why we're getting worse.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: Shall we talk about them?
• 13:06
  Speaker 2: All? We can't the changes to the economy in the
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: last decade for consumption over consumption, social media. We did
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: an episode of the generations raising insecure children because of
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: the previous generation. And I hate to blame it all
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: on the boomers, my gosh, but they started it. The
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: boomers are they'll never admit it, no, but they bought
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: their house for like thirty thousand dollars and now they're
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: sitting on a half a million dollar gold mine and
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: they're like, we ain't doelling, and so we're we have
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: a population of people who can never buy a home.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: We have and so it's like and then they raised
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: a bunch of really insecurely attached children. Sorry Boomers, you did,
• 13:57
  Speaker 2: and you were raised by the greatest generation who went
• 14:00
  Speaker 2: to the Great Depression, so maybe it's their fault. I
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: don't know. We can keep tracking it backwards. The bottom
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  Speaker 2: line is everybody right now is freaking fried. They fried,
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: and if you are listening right now, I'm fried me too.
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: Now rainus fried, and I am lucky enough to have
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: done enough work to realize when I'm hitting fried. And
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: so my life is drastically changing. So if you are
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: part of our email system, you got an email saying
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: I'm not taking any new individual clients past December seventeenth
• 14:34
  Speaker 2: because I just can't do it anymore. God spoken to me.
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: My job is to provide as much resource for free,
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: because it's a mission. Not about money. It's about a mission.
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: So I'm going to use that time that I was
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: seeing one on one clients and my one on one
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: rates got ridiculous. They got so high, not because I'm
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: a greedy person, but because that's the only way I
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: could stop the freight train of bookings. And then I
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: don't feel good about that. That feels icky to charge
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: people that much to see me for an hour, because
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: there's only so much I can do in an hour.
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: Right, So then you were getting expectation fatigue, yes, which
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: is a huge Yeah.
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: So I went on a personal tangent here. But back
• 15:15
  Speaker 2: to this alostatic load. It is the proportion of your
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: gas tank to your mileage that you have to drive.
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: And everybody's mileage that they have to drive is outweighing
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: what their tank can give. Yeah, it's demanding more without
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: being able to stop and refill your gas tank. And
• 15:34
  Speaker 2: so we are not moving through the world in a
• 15:37
  Speaker 2: way that accommodates how the human nervous system was designed
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: to navigate the world. Again, we're designed to navigate the
• 15:48
  Speaker 2: world slowly and in the present and with mindfulness and
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: with intention and with joy. That is what a safe
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: nervous system can do and what it expects. And so
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: when we are rushing from thing to thing, and we
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: are stressed about bills, and we are stressed about our kids,
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: and when we are doing all the things, the nervous
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  Speaker 2: system has to fuel you with adrenaline to do that.
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  Speaker 2: What happens when we switch from ventral vaguel parasympathetic moving
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: through the world slowly and intentionally mode to rushing around
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: to get ready, rushing from here, rushing from there, making
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: the meal, running through the drive through, to make sure
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: your kids have something to eat, getting them to sports practice,
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: being productive at work, trying to pour into your marriage,
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: trying to be a secure parent, to raise a kid
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: that's going to have not just a successful educational journey
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: or sports journey, but really can be successful at their relationships,
• 16:50
  Speaker 2: which is going to determine their most success and happiness
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: in life. We're missing the boat. We're giving them the sports,
• 16:59
  Speaker 2: we're giving them the education, but we're so freaking stressed
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: out that we can't be attuned loving parents. We are
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: emotionally fried. I have yet to meet someone lately that
• 17:11
  Speaker 2: is not emotionally fried. And so my job with clients
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: is to help them recognize this and to help them
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: give them tools to build their gas tank first and foremost,
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: which is going to give them more mileagiest even go
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: on the same pace that they are right now. Building
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: a bigger gas tank is going to help you. But
• 17:31
  Speaker 2: I think it's all time for us to just start
• 17:35
  Speaker 2: accepting and doing less so that we can move through
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: the world slower. Yes, I have hit an absolute wallah,
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: I've sobbed more times in the last three weeks than
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: I have in the last year. And last year was
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: incredibly traumatic for me, so because of the court case
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: and the satanic person that wanted to ruin my life.
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: And that's all done, she's gone. But now I'm in
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: trauma rebound from that. We have a ton of people
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: out there that are just recovering from a divorce and
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: they're like, I'm out of this horrible relationship now, but
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: I'm like worse than I was. Yeah. I hate to
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: tell you, the year that you step out of trauma,
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: your body will finally start to feel and finally start
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: to push out.
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: You'll feel so many things that you'll feel.
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: So many things, and it's going to take another year
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: after that before you start feeling normalcy.
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like recovering from having a baby.
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: People think you just bounce back in six weeks. Now,
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: that's a two year minimum process.
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: Yes, before you feel normally.
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 18:43
  Speaker 2: And so I don't have all the answers. I can
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: teach people how to build a bigger gas tank, but
• 18:48
  Speaker 2: I think what I want people to know is it's
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: not just about building a bigger gas tank. You can't
• 18:54
  Speaker 2: just keep building a bigger and bigger and bigger and
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: bigger gas tank. You sort of reach a peak of
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: how big that that tank can be. You have to
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: reduce the mileage. You have to and I'm going to
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: have to. And so I'm making a lot of pivots,
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: not taking one on one clients as a pivot. But
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: what pivots can you make in your life? What concessions
• 19:15
  Speaker 2: can you make? It might not look perfect, but you
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: can't do all the things. People.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: We want to take a minute and thank our sponsor
• 19:24
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  Speaker 2: I can't see how that would be possible.
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• 21:02
  Speaker 1: and don't forget mentioned the love Doc. I mean, one
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: easy one is just stop over consuming right, stop doom scrolling.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: And this is one that I personally need to work
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: on because it's like this vicious cycle where I get
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: so overstimulated and dysregulated that I'll doom scroll to sort
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: of disassociate and then buy things for dopamine hits. And
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: then in turn, when I'm faced with the actual things
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: that I've bought, I don't care about them anymore, and
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: then I have to do things crap. Yeah, it's more crap.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: And then it's just to put it away. You have
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: to get rid of the box. You have to break
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: the box down, recycling bin. It's a whole process.
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: So what actually happens when we hit too much alistatic load,
• 21:50
  Speaker 2: like our our mileage exceeds our gas tank. What happens
• 21:55
  Speaker 2: We see prolonged cortisol production, We see adrenals that are
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: working way too hard and can eventually max out and fatigue.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: So basically you're going to be extremely inflamed. Your immune
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: system is going to skew itself, and it can skeew
• 22:13
  Speaker 2: itself to the right or to the left. To the
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: right is we have too much Oh my gosh, this
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: is my brain fog. So we have like too much
• 22:30
  Speaker 2: inflammation and too much cell mediated immunity, and that arm
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: gets too So we see a lot of auto inflammation, okay,
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: or we see a skew towards more humoral side of immunity,
• 22:41
  Speaker 2: more B cell activity, which is going to give you
• 22:46
  Speaker 2: some other forms of autoimmunity. So we can have auto inflammation, autoimmunity.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: We're going to look like like joint pain.
• 22:55
  Speaker 2: Oh gosh, it can look like a a zillion different things. Yeah,
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: I mean, people get lupus, people get chronic fatigue, people
• 23:04
  Speaker 2: get chronic epstein bar flare ups, people get just oh
• 23:11
  Speaker 2: my gosh, gut it mcas issues. Yeah, the chronic gut dysregulation,
• 23:17
  Speaker 2: we see all of the gut autoimmunity so much, we
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: see migraines. We see it's just too many lists.
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: So your immune system has this real delicate balance, and
• 23:28
  Speaker 2: when you overload your nervous system, the first place it
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: takes from is your immune system because it's the first
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: place it can take from without you immediately dying.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: So sometimes that looks like people get sick a lot more.
• 23:43
  Speaker 2: But you're in a lot of trouble. When you stop
• 23:45
  Speaker 2: getting sick, you stop getting the colds, you stop getting
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: the flues. Then you start seeing real gut neurological, endocrine,
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: then vital organs. Vital organs are the last place it
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: will steal from. But we start to see like the
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: endothelial cells of the heart start becoming damaged. We start
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: to see and this is where I was. I was
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: at work and damage level that over dilation of vessels
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: in the brain. That's where my vestibular migraine came from.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: This is terrifying because I haven't had a cold in
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: like three or four years.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if you haven't had a cold in three or
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: four years, you're past that. Yep. And I'm sorry sis, yeahs.
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: Joint pain is mass Okay, So it's at max per
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: How can you one build your gas tank bigger? That's
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: what you have to do, and that is what I
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: teach people to do. Ultimately, you build the biggest gas
• 24:40
  Speaker 2: tank you can because when you get triggered in your relationship,
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: that's going to take a ton of gas. That's going
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: to empty half your tank ye in the moment of trigger.
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: So you have to have half a tank left to
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: be able to be regulated enough to access your prefrontal cortex,
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: which is where your empathy and mindfulness and compassion and
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: openness and curiosity live right, Ye, So how do we
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: recover from emotional burnout? I'm here with you, folks. I'm
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: burnt out. I am in too much parasympathetic or sorry
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: sympathetic activity, not enough para sympathetic activity. I am feeling
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: it in my body, I am feeling it in my mind.
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: And I am not willing to live that way anymore
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: because I have known and felt safety and I am
• 25:26
  Speaker 2: now feeling out of the safe zone. And I'm not
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: gonna keep going. I'm backing way off. And that looks
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: like saying no, a heck of a lot more.
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: And no amount of money in the world is worth sacrificing.
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: It's not. It's not I'd rather go back. I'd go backwards.
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: And any day me too, I will go backwards. I
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: will sell things, I will do whatever it takes, because
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: time is more precious to me, and presence for my children,
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: and joy is more It's more precious to me than
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: all of the things. And I love what I've built,
• 26:02
  Speaker 2: and I'm proud of what I've built, But gosh, aren't
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: it There's no more of me left. There's no more
• 26:10
  Speaker 2: of me left, and I can only hope that, you know,
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: people that would be like, oh, I only want one
• 26:18
  Speaker 2: on one will realize that there's so much value in
• 26:21
  Speaker 2: the group. And we just readid the whole course. It
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: has a seventy page work book. It has five hours
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: or over five hours of learning time of learning content.
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: But it's also designed in a way that if you
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: just want to hit the high points, because that will
• 26:39
  Speaker 2: make you disregulated to have that much content. It's like,
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: here are the high points, here are the high points.
• 26:44
  Speaker 2: You can just do that. You can just go through
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: the high points, and then when you feel better and
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: you have more energy, then you can go deeper if
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: you want to. So it's kind of for everyone. The
• 26:55
  Speaker 2: person that wants to do all the deep dives, the
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: extremely anxious person that's going to listen to every minute
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: and read every page. Yeah, the da that's like, just
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: give me the high points. That's all I can handle
• 27:04
  Speaker 2: in my nervous system. We got you. So I'm so
• 27:08
  Speaker 2: proud of what we built. We built something really amazing
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: and it's launching. Well, it's now, it's available.
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: Now, it's available now. Yeah, it's available now. When this drops,
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: it'll be available.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: And everybody that's previously bought the course or group you
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: automatically have access to it.
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: You have access to it for life, for life.
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: Those of you that have not yet gone through the
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: group program or have not yet bought the course, you're
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: in for a real treat because I put the best
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: of what I got out there, The newest, latest, greatest
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: science is in it. Because I'm a scientist and science
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: is ever evolving and I always want to make sure
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: I'm on top of it. And this is what this is.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: Another thing that makes me mad the amount of people
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: out there right now that are working from the book Attached,
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: which is so behind. It's a good book, it was
• 27:58
  Speaker 2: a great book of its time. It's outdated. It's outdated.
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: We know forty times more now than when that book
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: came out.
• 28:07
  Speaker 1: Science changes.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: The assessments for attachment are outdated. That's why I'm making
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: my own.
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: Yay, that's another project. We can't pay another projects, but
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: that's an exciting one.
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: It is an exciting project because there's things that I'm
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: seeing in my clinical practice that have yet to be measured,
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: like the DA with trauma overlay, the AP with trauma overlay.
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: They're probably getting miscategorized a lot as fas. Yet they
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: don't have the other side of their attachments, so they're
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: not true fas and the science is not showing that.
• 28:38
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, there's a gap here. What do I do?
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: I'm going to push myself to fill it. But I
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: want to be able to do those types of things,
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: which is why I'm decreasing one on one. But bottom
• 28:47
  Speaker 2: line is you have to decrease your mileage and build
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: a bigger gas tank. Those two things have to work
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: in conjunction with each other. Where your nervous system is very,
• 28:58
  Speaker 2: very adaptive. It's not like, oh, I had this stressful season,
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: the ugh, I just go back into this unstressful season. No,
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: your nervous system learns to adapt to that stressful season,
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: and until you actually use tools to take it backwards
• 29:13
  Speaker 2: to reregulating, it will continue to burn more gas even
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: when you're not doing as much mileage, when you're not
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: you know, driving as much if you will. So you
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: have to actually be intentional with yourself, even if you
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: start saying no more, even if you cut down things
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: in your life. If you're not actively working on that
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: gas tank, it's just it's like you're driving a duly
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: truck that's just burning gas.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: And spending time. I think for you specifically, you know,
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: is just the time that you do have another very
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: short windows of where you can spend some time alone.
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: If I ever am alone, it's in the morning, I
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: decide not to go to the gym. Maybe my husband
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: goes to the gym, and I just have like an
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: hour to just sit in bed and drink coffee.
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: You like a day, a whole day, yeah, right, at
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: least till you have to pick up your kids.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: Where when is that going to happen?
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: I don't know, but you need to make it happen
• 30:19
  Speaker 1: because I just, you know, a whole day that if
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: I can give myself a whole day where no one
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: depends on me, that means like I don't have to
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: teach jazz or sets, I don't have to do anything
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: for work, I don't have to clean my house, I
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: don't have to cook a meal, you know, because your
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: life is of course a little different since I'm an
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: empty nester. But where there's just absolutely nothing, it really
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: truly recharges me.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: I's the only thing I can't even imagine that I
• 30:46
  Speaker 2: don't even know what that looks like.
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: I know you said the other day you hadn't been
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: alone in five months.
• 30:50
  Speaker 2: Five months. I don't think I've had a day. I
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: don't think I've had a couple hours alone.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: And I would so pull a forest scump and take
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: off frunt and never look back. Yeah, I know, I
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: just don't think I could do. I not at this
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: point in my life. Well, which I've raised a kid.
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: It's a little bit different. But I mean, I don't know.
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: I don't know what I'm gonna do. Honestly, I'm pulling
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: back not doing the one on ones. I'm gonna have to.
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: I pray that the revenue doesn't drop. I pray people
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: see the value in the group. Honestly, most of the
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: time people that are do one on one and they
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: go through the group, they're like, I should have done this,
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: I should have done just gone straight into this. Yeah,
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: I could have saved myself time and money because I
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: got everything I needed out of it. Because it is
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: it is everything you need. You get access to me
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: or coach Elizabeth, you know, depending upon which group you
• 31:45
  Speaker 2: sign up for mine or a little higher priced, you
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: get all of the stuff for life. The calls are
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: recorded for life, the self paced coaching programs for Life,
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: all the PDFs you get for Life, the workbook now
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: it's now into a full workbook that's easy to navigate
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: so you can always go back to it. And then
• 32:05
  Speaker 2: we have a legacy program now that you can join
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: where you can get to continued support after your journey
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: if you feel like you need it.
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: And that's great because you know, for less than one
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: hundred bucks a month, you're going to get a lesson.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: Every month, you're gonna get a fifteen percent off code
• 32:20
  Speaker 1: that you can use for all the one on ones
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: with coach Elizabeth or Coach Amy. You're going to get
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: access to any new product launch for free. I mean
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: that's huge, that's huge value. And I don't want to
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: just be like a salesperson here.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: I just want my audience to know my heart is
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: to give more free resources, which means more webinars, more lives,
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: more effort into the podcast, and that is just what's
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: going to have to go to do it is the
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: one on ones. So hopefully people aren't upset about that.
• 32:52
  Speaker 2: Not trying to be a salesperson here, I'm just trying
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: to explain to my audience wh I I.
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: Think they were like they scrambled.
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: Oh, frantically booking. Frantic bookings is what we have seen, frantic,
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: frantic bookings. And so that I'm not gonna lie. I
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: don't want to engage in spirit fear that's from the devil.
• 33:08
  Speaker 2: And I don't know what it's gonna look like. I
• 33:10
  Speaker 2: don't know what revenue is gonna look like. I don't know.
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: If I don't know what it'll look like, it's just
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: gonna be a different season and it's gonna work better
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: for me, and it's going to fulfill my mission.
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: And if we said from the very beginning, when we
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: you know, when I came on, it's like, when something
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: doesn't work, we'll just pivot. It doesn't matter what, Like
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: there might be an initial like gut punch that we
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: you know, have to be like all right, let's sit
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: back and let's you know, figure this out. But that's
• 33:43
  Speaker 1: what this is all about. It's like, it's keeping it
• 33:46
  Speaker 1: going and how do we do that? And it might
• 33:49
  Speaker 1: look different every year, right, it might look different every
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: six months. And this is I mean, this is the
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: basis of entrepreneurship. This is what it I mean, Hermos
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: said the other day, it's not getting started. It's in
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: keeping it going. That's the hard part. See you Hermos
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: for saying that, because even it was profound. When I
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: heard it, I was like, because so many people think
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: it's the getting started that's hard.
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not the getting started and it's just easy part.
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: I really feel for people that are just burn out
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: on both ends. You know, maybe they're they're the nurses,
• 34:25
  Speaker 2: they're the dental hygienists, they're the you know, the plumbers,
• 34:29
  Speaker 2: they're the people that are physically grinding on their feet,
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: you know. I mean, at least we get to sit
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: in a chair.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we have time freedom right, like to the
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: point there is there's lots of freedom in the sense
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: of like, yes, we eat, sleep and breathe. Those guys
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: like I dream about work, but.
• 34:49
  Speaker 2: I don't I have the same ten dreams on repeat. Yeah,
• 34:51
  Speaker 2: And it's very clear that my subconscious has some loops
• 34:55
  Speaker 2: to close, and it's because of the increased stress. When
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: my dreams start going on repeat, that's another become very vivid.
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: That's there's your sign you have some some loops that
• 35:09
  Speaker 2: need to close, subconscious loops, and that's a sign that
• 35:13
  Speaker 2: my nervous system feels so stressed that it can't close
• 35:16
  Speaker 2: those loops, and so what can you do? I don't know.
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: I don't know. If I had the answer for you,
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: I would exchange money for time every day, every day
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: of the week. I'm going to look at my life.
• 35:30
  Speaker 2: I just ordered some of those meals from Factor because
• 35:34
  Speaker 2: if our kids, our kids are gone every night, Donald's
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: the one driving them half the time, then it's like,
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: what are we eating. We're going to We're doing fast food,
• 35:43
  Speaker 2: We're ordering a pizza, We're door dashing. So it's like,
• 35:47
  Speaker 2: I've got to do something. So I'm going to be trading. Yes,
• 35:50
  Speaker 2: it's cheaper to go to the grocery and cook, but
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: if it gives me more time, I'm willing to live
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: more meagerly. So I don't But I also know that
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: there are people out there that are going, yeah, right, Sarah,
• 36:03
  Speaker 2: I'm busting my button. We're barely getting by. There is
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: nowhere to cut, and I'm so All I can say
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: is I'm so sorry. And I don't know what the
• 36:10
  Speaker 2: answer is for you, other than you know, if you
• 36:15
  Speaker 2: can tune into some of my free resources where I
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: can teach you how to build a bigger gas tank.
• 36:20
  Speaker 2: Just listen if you you know, catch the Webinar Replay podcast. Yeah,
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: I mean keep tuning into this podcast.
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: This podcast is huge. You give out so much free
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: valuable tips. The emotional processing episode was huge.
• 36:38
  Speaker 2: Yet I don't even know.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: I don't know either.
• 36:41
  Speaker 2: I don't think. I don't think it's dropped.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: Okay, okay, it might be next week. I don't know.
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: And guess what, I'm going to totally admit to this.
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: I forgot to upload the podcast this week because that's
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: how emotionally burnt out I am. I know, can you
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: do it?
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: Are we gonna do it? This week?
• 36:57
  Speaker 1: We started? I did it just it just always drop
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: it Monday night, so then it drops Tuesday morning.
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: But I'm sorry, guys.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: I worked till like nine Monday night after we did
• 37:07
  Speaker 1: like the video shooting stuff. Then I had to go
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: home and do more work and then I was just
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: like it just completely. It did not dawn on me
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: that I'd forgotten to do it until yesterday.
• 37:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean sorry, people don't understand how big this is. Gotten.
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: Oh it costs, and this is really sad, but I'm
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: gonna be vulnerable in chair. It costs one hundred thousand
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: dollars to run this platform. Oh absolutely, that's the cost. Yeah,
• 37:31
  Speaker 2: that's the money it takes. So the pressure to bring
• 37:34
  Speaker 2: in more than that a month so that I can
• 37:38
  Speaker 2: pay all my people so we make payroll, all right,
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: and so that this train keeps going is.
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: Tough, immense, But it's a blessing. It's a blessing. It's
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: such a blessing because you know, you've gotten to and
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: we we're talking about this the other day, and I
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: think it's in that perspective shift that really helps too,
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: is like like, oh gosh, we were talking about it,
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: and when was this, oh the other day when we
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: actually did try to decompress a little bit, like just
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: how immensely blessed, like you've made my life and then
• 38:12
  Speaker 1: it's allowed, you know, Reagan's life to be blessed, my sister,
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: and then you know, we're bringing josh on, my husband,
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: who's gonna you know, it's gonna bless his life and
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: he's able to get out of you know, being a
• 38:26
  Speaker 1: police officer hopefully, and you know the dangers that come
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: along with that profession. Like, what a beautiful blessing to
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: be able to bless all these people you love? Is
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: there a lot of pressure because people then depend on you. Yes, yeah,
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: but I mean you're changing the people that are most
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: important to you and other people that you don't even
• 38:47
  Speaker 1: know their lives, their lives and you know, I mean
• 38:50
  Speaker 1: everybody struggles. I think maybe influencers maybe more than others
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: struggle with imposter syndrome. But you know, those are the
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: moments that you have to say, Look, at the end
• 39:00
  Speaker 1: of the day, I'm helping people. Yeah, I'm helping it.
• 39:04
  Speaker 2: Can it can hurt sometimes when I pour my heart
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: and soul into something and then somebody gets on there
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: and says another woman talking blah blah blah, like that's
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: not what the world needs to hear, like something like that. Yeah,
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: or you need to know, I mean, just be filled
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: with like you need to know. Job you're you know,
• 39:23
  Speaker 2: what makes you think you know about relationships? Like why
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: you know? Just whatever? Hate And at the end of
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: the day, I'm just like, okay, whatever, roll off, roll
• 39:31
  Speaker 2: off my back, keep going.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: But it's another piece.
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: All I can say is I will help you build
• 39:37
  Speaker 2: a bigger gas tank. I can't make decisions for you
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: about how to cut back in your life to drive
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: less mileage. It mileage I can't even talk right now.
• 39:46
  Speaker 2: I'm so burnout mileage, But really that's it's It comes
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: down to those two things. You have to stop doing
• 39:55
  Speaker 2: as much, and you have to have a bigger gas
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: tank or else you're just regulating your nervous system. You
• 40:03
  Speaker 2: are being fueled by adrenaline and cortisol, and likely if
• 40:06
  Speaker 2: you're really maxed out, you're going into functional freeze, which
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: means you're in dorsal veagel shutdown and fight or flight
• 40:13
  Speaker 2: at the same time, which is like being in a
• 40:15
  Speaker 2: car and having the gas and the break pressed, which
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: means you're not as productive as you could be, but
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: you're also freaking fried and just producing adrenaline and you
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: probably can't sleep, and you know you're the whole world
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: seems like a threat. I gotta be here, I gotta
• 40:30
  Speaker 2: be there, I gotta do this, I got to accomplish this.
• 40:32
  Speaker 2: But yet you're super dissociated from your own internal world,
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: so you're not present with yourself.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: And as women, you're not producing any oxytocin, which is
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: the hormone that.
• 40:43
  Speaker 2: The master nervous system regulator for women, as oxytocin and
• 40:46
  Speaker 2: dopamine kills it yep, it does, and we're all just
• 40:51
  Speaker 2: over here doing the best we can. So I don't
• 40:54
  Speaker 2: know if I have all the answers for you other
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: than I can help you build you a bigger gas tank. Yeah,
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: and I would be honored to that.
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: And keep listening to the podcast. It's a beautiful free
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: platform that is available to you.
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: This is a time that we got to wrap up,
• 41:10
  Speaker 2: unfortunately so much. I would like to get into a
• 41:12
  Speaker 2: lot more science of the brain and body, but I
• 41:15
  Speaker 2: think I would be repeating a lot of what I
• 41:17
  Speaker 2: talked about in the emotional Processing episode and some of
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: the other past episodes. But just my heart goes out
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: to you, all, my fried people, and I love you,
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: I'm thankful for you. I'mity that we live in is
• 41:32
  Speaker 2: it's not sustainable anymore.
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: We're all in this together, and it's you're not alone
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: and feeling just completely overwhelmed depleted. Yeah.
• 41:40
  Speaker 2: Just I'm going to pray for all of you tonight
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: and just send just all of my good vibes your way,
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: and just pray for God to open up a window
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: or a door for you to relieve some of your
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: alistatic load and your stress and to give you some peace,
• 41:55
  Speaker 2: especially going into this holiday season.
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I want for you, guys, praying collectively
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: for the world. So thank you guys so much for
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: always tuning in listening. We love you all. Listen. I
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: will say, in the past couple of weeks, I've gotten
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: some beautiful messages from you all, and I always try
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: to tear up when I talk about it, but I
• 42:12
  Speaker 1: always tear up when I read them. They're so beautiful
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: and so meaningful, and it really does keep us going.
• 42:18
  Speaker 1: It's really what keeps us going is getting those messages
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: that are just like you've you know, listening to the
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: podcast has helped me so much, and so please keep
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: writing us because we love those Those truly keep us.
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: They keep us going on the hard day, they keep
• 42:32
  Speaker 1: us going. So thank you guys so much for tuning in.
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: Continue to tune in, write us a review. That's the
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: best thing, honestly, that you can do for us to
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: continue to grow this platform. And until next time, peace, love,
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: and perspective.