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I Swiped Right on Love... and a Financial Mess · She's On The Money

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yorr
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  Speaker 1: the Order KERNI Whoaltbury and a waddery woman. And before
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I
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  Speaker 1: would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: of which this podcast is recorded on a wondery country,
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming
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  Speaker 1: through as this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing
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  Speaker 1: and the storytelling of you to make a difference for
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: today and lasting impact for tomorrow.
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: Let's get into it.
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  Speaker 3: She's on the Money, She's on the Money.
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  Speaker 4: Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, CASO Millennials
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: who want financial freedom. Welcome back to another one of
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  Speaker 4: our money dis my favorite episode of the week where
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  Speaker 4: I get the absolute pleasure of talking to one of
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  Speaker 4: our community members all about their money story. So before
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  Speaker 4: we jump into it, I did want to give you
• 1:15
  Speaker 4: guys a little bit of a content warning. We do
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  Speaker 4: touch on the topic of financial abuse. We don't get
• 1:20
  Speaker 4: too deep into it, but we do talk about the topic,
• 1:24
  Speaker 4: what occurred and how it occurred. So if this is
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  Speaker 4: something that is not right for you. Please go have
• 1:29
  Speaker 4: a look at our entire library of literally hundreds of
• 1:33
  Speaker 4: She's on the Money episodes, and we will meet you
• 1:35
  Speaker 4: next episode. For those of you who are sticking around,
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  Speaker 4: let's jump straight into it. This week, I got a
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  Speaker 4: message and it sounded exactly like this. Hi, She's on
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  Speaker 4: the Money. Well, my money story is very normal. My
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  Speaker 4: partners was not. When I met my partner, he didn't
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  Speaker 4: have a dollar to his name and hadn't failed his
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: tax return in six years. This all came to life
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  Speaker 4: when we were preparing everything to try and get a
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  Speaker 4: home loan. I've helped him change his ways, but he
• 2:02
  Speaker 4: came from a difficult household and childhood. Some of the
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  Speaker 4: things we had to work through was his ADHD, poor
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  Speaker 4: savings and planning habits, his blindness to any paperwork, and
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  Speaker 4: a discovery of an act of financial abuse against him,
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  Speaker 4: which has changed his relationship with his parents. Forever Money Diarist,
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  Speaker 4: this is such a special different view. I'm so excited
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  Speaker 4: to get into.
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  Speaker 2: It me too. Thanks for having me on.
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  Speaker 4: I feel like this will be really powerful and something
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  Speaker 4: that lots of us in the community can resonate with,
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  Speaker 4: especially like as you learn more about money, or you've
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: been listening to heaps of Sheese on the Money episodes,
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  Speaker 4: You'll just be going, Oh, I'm not that bad at money,
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  Speaker 4: and then realize that there are people in your circle
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  Speaker 4: that need the support from what you're learning in the community.
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  Speaker 4: I just think this is going to be a really
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  Speaker 4: good one.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, one hundred percent.
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  Speaker 4: All right, let's start off the way I always start
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  Speaker 4: an episode money, Darrest. If I asked you to give
• 2:52
  Speaker 4: yourself a money grade, what would you grade yourself from
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  Speaker 4: A through to F.
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  Speaker 2: I've been thinking about this one, and I'd have to say, collectively,
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  Speaker 2: between us, we are a C. I think we have
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  Speaker 2: really good habits and we track and we plan now.
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  Speaker 2: But what I've been thinking about is we are kind
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  Speaker 2: of in our debt era. We're at that stage in
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  Speaker 2: our lives where I still have quite a big X.
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  Speaker 2: We've taken on a mortgage, you know, and we're still
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  Speaker 2: in a building phase, a glow up phase, if you will. So, yeah,
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  Speaker 2: I have to go with C.
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  Speaker 4: Okay, But I love the way you phrased this because
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  Speaker 4: you didn't go, oh, we're in so much debt. You know,
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  Speaker 4: we're a C. We're not very good at it. You
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  Speaker 4: said because we're in our debt era. And here's why. Like,
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  Speaker 4: it's as though you're automatically aware that this is just
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  Speaker 4: a phase or a chapter of life and you'll come
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  Speaker 4: out the other side. How did you come to have
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  Speaker 4: that mentality? Because that's a literal. I would love to
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  Speaker 4: copy and paste that into every brain of every She's
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  Speaker 4: on the money person ever.
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  Speaker 2: Oh, thank you, I must have met the time I've
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  Speaker 2: spent with my partner. You know, I'm a firstborn daughter,
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  Speaker 2: I'm very headstrong. I've always wanted what I've wanted when
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  Speaker 2: I wanted it and just went for it. And when
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  Speaker 2: you partner up with someone, you have to change those ideals,
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  Speaker 2: the way you see the world and the way you
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  Speaker 2: engage with people. And yeah, instead of seeing it as
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  Speaker 2: a detriment to us, I can see it as just
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  Speaker 2: a phase of our life because we're planning to get
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  Speaker 2: out of it. Yeah.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, I love this so much. All right, let's jump
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  Speaker 4: straight into the next question, which I think is going
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  Speaker 4: to be really juicy this time, money Dores, Can you
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  Speaker 4: tell me a little bit more about your money story?
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  Speaker 4: I guess collectively.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, So I'll start with my own. So I grew
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  Speaker 2: up in a working class family. It was just myself,
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  Speaker 2: my brother, and my parents. My dad was a firefighter
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  Speaker 2: and my mom just worked odd jobs. She, you know,
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  Speaker 2: just just wanted to be a family woman. And we
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  Speaker 2: weren't well off by any means. You know, my mom
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  Speaker 2: likes to say that our family treat was once a
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  Speaker 2: month getting cheese pizzas from the local shop.
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  Speaker 4: So, but that's really cute, and a cheese pizza is,
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  Speaker 4: don't get me wrong, incredible. What person doesn't love a
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  Speaker 4: good cheese pizza.
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  Speaker 2: Still, to this day, I think of those memories and
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  Speaker 2: a cheese pizza always brings me joy exactly.
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  Speaker 4: It's all about their memory is not about how much
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  Speaker 4: it costs.
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  Speaker 2: That's it. And I learned work ethic from the those guys.
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  Speaker 2: They're now comfortable in their retirement. Not you know, crazy,
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  Speaker 2: well off by any means, but they showed me the
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  Speaker 2: value of sacrifice. And I've always been able to work.
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  Speaker 2: I've when I was in high school fourteen nine months,
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  Speaker 2: I had two jobs, so I'd work one job in
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  Speaker 2: the morning before school. I was a mail sorterer.
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  Speaker 4: Oh my god, iconic.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I didn't realize at the time. Looking back, I'm like, man,
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  Speaker 2: how did I do that you know about sleep. Yeah,
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  Speaker 2: we'd sort mail in the morning in my school uniform,
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  Speaker 2: go to school, and then go to a bakery after
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  Speaker 2: school and do the closing shift.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, thinking back on who I was as a teenager,
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  Speaker 4: there is no chance you would have gotten me out
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  Speaker 4: of bed to do mail sorting before well, like absolutely not,
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  Speaker 4: like I had an after school job. And even at
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  Speaker 4: that point, I was like, this is a drag, Like,
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  Speaker 4: don't get me wrong, that's iconic.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, I didn't even think twice about it a time.
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  Speaker 2: All I think was my weekends are free because I'll
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  Speaker 2: do all the weekday shifts, so I'll get all my
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  Speaker 2: work done during the weekday. I was a kid with
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  Speaker 2: money and my weekends free, so that's what drove me.
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  Speaker 4: And okay, but that's genius. How did you learn how
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  Speaker 4: to hack the systems so young? Because I spent all
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  Speaker 4: weekend working like I didn't get free time, and I
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  Speaker 4: don't think And I was saying this to a girlfriend
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  Speaker 4: the other day we went out for a coffee and
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  Speaker 4: a walk, and I was saying, do you know what, Like,
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  Speaker 4: it's not until I got past the age of I
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  Speaker 4: think twenty six that I started to get my weekends
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  Speaker 4: back because I was doing hospitality and retail and all
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  Speaker 4: these jobs that just didn't allow you to have a weekend,
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  Speaker 4: which is fine, but I remember being so lost when
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  Speaker 4: I finally got one. So you never had to go
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  Speaker 4: through that era. No.
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  Speaker 2: I did eventually move into retail to support myself through UNI.
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  Speaker 2: So I realized looking back hour good. I had it
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  Speaker 2: during school, but it was something that helped a lot
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  Speaker 2: for me, being able to sustay myself, set myself up
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  Speaker 2: while I was in HC as well and still being
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  Speaker 2: a kid. I had goals. I saved, I self supported
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  Speaker 2: travel around the world while I studied, Like I you know,
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  Speaker 2: I really think I did.
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  Speaker 4: Alright, you sound like you're iconic. I need to know
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  Speaker 4: going back, Sorry, we need to talk about you at
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  Speaker 4: fourteen years and nine months. Where did that ethic come
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  Speaker 4: from then? Was that your parents saying, all right, money
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  Speaker 4: direst is now time to go out and get a job.
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  Speaker 4: Or was this you going, hey, I see the value
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  Speaker 4: in this. This is something I want, Like, how do
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  Speaker 4: we motivate other fourteen year olds to do something similar?
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  Speaker 4: Because I have a couple of people in our community
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  Speaker 4: who are like my fourteen year old does not want
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  Speaker 4: a job, and I really want them to learn some independence.
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  Speaker 4: And it's like, well, I mean everybody's different, but like,
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  Speaker 4: where did your motivation come from?
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was my parents. I wanted the things I was,
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  Speaker 2: you know, I am a big book worm, and to
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  Speaker 2: support that. My parents couldn't you know, they you know,
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  Speaker 2: but wanted to support me. But I also learned once
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  Speaker 2: you make a commitment, you're there. So you know, once
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  Speaker 2: you sign up and you get the job, like I
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  Speaker 2: was committed to seeing it through, going all my shifts,
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  Speaker 2: like supporting my boss, and I must have been when
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  Speaker 2: it comes to things like that, I don't think twice.
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  Speaker 2: And I put it down to my parents watching my
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  Speaker 2: dad go you know, four weeks of fostering on and
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  Speaker 2: off night shifts at a time, like just to help
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  Speaker 2: us sight. It's just imbued in me, I suppose.
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  Speaker 4: Yeah, wow, all right, well I love this. Tell me more.
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  Speaker 4: After UNI, what happened?
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, so I took a job that was out in
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  Speaker 2: the country, New South Wales, so that was about five
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  Speaker 2: hours inland away from my family.
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  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh.
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  Speaker 2: Yeah, this was twenty twenty. So I accepted and started
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  Speaker 2: the role January twenty twenty and then I think we
• 8:16
  Speaker 2: all know what happened after that, and I got cut
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  Speaker 2: off from my family for a little while at least.
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  Speaker 2: But I realized if I was going to survive in
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  Speaker 2: this new space, in this new role, I was going
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  Speaker 2: to have to meet people. And I met my now husband.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, come on, tell us more like I love love.
• 8:32
  Speaker 4: How do your husband?
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  Speaker 2: We met online? We're both quite introverted, so.
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  Speaker 4: We Hey, there's nothing wrong with that.
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  Speaker 2: It wasn't gonna be the traditional way for us.
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  Speaker 4: Oh, I met my husband on Tinder, and I am
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  Speaker 4: proud of that. I wasn't at the time, though, Like
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  Speaker 4: I remember when I first said to my parents, oh,
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  Speaker 4: I've got a partner, Like, I'd love you to meet them,
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  Speaker 4: They're like, how did you meet? And I was like, oh,
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: I don't really want to share this, But now I'm like, oh, Tinder.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: It was elite one hundred percent. I think we first
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: mentioned Tinder in our wedding speeches, but other than that,
• 9:00
  Speaker 2: everyone had been to be in the dark.
• 9:01
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh. Same. Like our wedding celebrant actually out
• 9:06
  Speaker 4: at us because we told her and like so many people,
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: you know, how, like you get past that period of
• 9:11
  Speaker 4: time where people stop asking, and you're like great, Like
• 9:13
  Speaker 4: we passed this period. She mentioned it, and I remember thinking,
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: literally I'm the bride standing at the front and going like,
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: what are you doing, Megan, what are you doing?
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  Speaker 2: Oh God?
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  Speaker 4: I didn't mind, but it was actually so funny. All right,
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: So tell me a bit about your partner.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so he comes from a larger family than I do.
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  Speaker 2: He's got five siblings. He grew up in the country
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  Speaker 2: where we met. He has a very different money story
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  Speaker 2: to myself. They didn't have as much money and the
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: parental guidance around money and parental guidance in in general,
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: it was a very strained relationship with my partner and
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  Speaker 2: his father who left, and mom and stepdad and they
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: just yeah, it wasn't any guidance in the space of finances,
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  Speaker 2: and when there was money, it wasn't prioritize and spent
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: on himself and his siblings. It was held. And I
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: think that in my eyes, that's what led to some
• 10:04
  Speaker 2: of the habits that I found him with. And you
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: know that's in combination with somemodi HD tendencies that Yeah,
• 10:11
  Speaker 2: he's he grew up and he got his apprenticeship out
• 10:15
  Speaker 2: of school and went straight into the workforce. So he
• 10:18
  Speaker 2: works in the minds now, and you know, he's been
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: in that for ten years making really good money, and
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: when I met him, he didn't have a dollar to
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: his name. So yeah, it's taken a while for us
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: to be able to understand each other where we come
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: from and how to work together. But it's coming to
• 10:34
  Speaker 2: terms with those realities of his backstory that's been able
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: to lead us here. Yeah.
• 10:38
  Speaker 4: That's honestly so cool that you're working through that, but
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  Speaker 4: also so common. I feel like I have spoken to
• 10:44
  Speaker 4: numerous people in and outside of our community who have
• 10:47
  Speaker 4: worked in the minds. They're earning epic amounts of money,
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: but it's like they do five FO and then they
• 10:52
  Speaker 4: come home and they live their best lives and absolutely
• 10:55
  Speaker 4: blow through the cash because they're like, well, I am
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  Speaker 4: five FO, I have more than enough money and live
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: my best life. They come back for a week or so,
• 11:02
  Speaker 4: blow through cash, go back, earn more, and like, it's
• 11:06
  Speaker 4: just a cycle that keeps going on. So tell me
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: a bit more about that and how it came up
• 11:12
  Speaker 4: in your relationship, because money could be a fickle topic
• 11:14
  Speaker 4: and it can be something that makes or breaks a
• 11:16
  Speaker 4: relationship and obviously you guys have tackled it head on,
• 11:20
  Speaker 4: what did that look like? Because it could be confronting,
• 11:23
  Speaker 4: like if you turned around to your partner and said, hey,
• 11:25
  Speaker 4: you need to get better at money, he might have
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: been like money, darist off your trot.
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: It was. It was very daunting at the start. So
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: while I'm very good with money, moso not very open
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: about it. It's not something that you do openly talk about.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: But I think it came down to the first year
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: or so we were together. And it will be noted
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: that we did move very quickly in our relationships. We
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: met in twenty one.
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: Oh girl, I get it when you know you know,
• 11:48
  Speaker 4: you know.
• 11:49
  Speaker 2: You know. In twenty one we met and then early
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: twenty two week we had a house together. So it actually, yeah,
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: it was a very quick turn around. So the conversation
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: had to come up quickly, and it came up tax time.
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: I was about to put my tax in and I
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: asked him if he wanted some help with, you know,
• 12:04
  Speaker 2: doing his And that's when that kind of first discovery
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: was made that he hadn't done them in six years.
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: And at first I was shocked, and I suppose, like
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: any rational person who's just met a new person. Bread flag,
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: red Flag Central.
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: You're like, what is going on here? Run?
• 12:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah? You know. Another admission is that before my current husband,
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: I hadn't really had any partners, any long term partners.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: So I was like, is this normal? Like should I
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: be running away very very quickly? Like is it worth
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: trying to work through this? And once we did work
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: through the tax stuff, which did leave him with quite
• 12:36
  Speaker 2: a hefty bill afterwards. So one thing, when you're making
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: good money and you don't have private health insurance, you
• 12:43
  Speaker 2: get taxed quite a bit. And that's what we had
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: discovered after you know, so long making money not doing
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: his taxes, he had a bill.
• 12:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, the Medicare levy surcharge does sting and it would
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: compound over six years. So you might go, oh, it's
• 12:56
  Speaker 4: one percent of what I earn, or I think it's
• 12:58
  Speaker 4: two percent now of what I earned. It's not much,
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: but over six years, that's two percent every year. So
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: that would have been a pretty hefty bill for him
• 13:06
  Speaker 4: to pay. That would have been a surprise, and he
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: probably was really frustrated once you started breaking it down
• 13:12
  Speaker 4: with him that had he just got private health insurance,
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: it wouldn't.
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: Have been an issue one hundred percent, Like it.
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: Wouldn't have come up. And I'm yeah, it's one of
• 13:20
  Speaker 4: those things where is it a red flag? Well that depends,
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: and in your situation, I don't think it was at all.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: It just was, Hey, my partner actually has his head
• 13:29
  Speaker 4: in the sand about finance and money, and you know
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: that might give him a mad amount of anxiety and
• 13:34
  Speaker 4: we can work through this, or it could literally be
• 13:37
  Speaker 4: someone evading tax. But at the time you don't know.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: Yeah, one hundred percent and that's that's what I read.
• 13:43
  Speaker 2: Which one is it balancing the scales there? But no,
• 13:46
  Speaker 2: he was so embarrassed.
• 13:47
  Speaker 4: Oh, but you don't need to be embarrassed. Like this
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: actually happens all the time. We had a money dearrest,
• 13:52
  Speaker 4: what was it like maybe twenty twenty one who hadn't
• 13:55
  Speaker 4: done their tax return for fifteen years. Wow, Like I
• 14:00
  Speaker 4: got it sorted out, Like I got them hooked up
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: with an accountant and it all got worked out. But like,
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: if you're in that situation, it can be fixed. Like
• 14:08
  Speaker 4: the ato, they get it, and the best thing that
• 14:10
  Speaker 4: you can do is actually organize it before they come
• 14:13
  Speaker 4: to you, Like organize it, do it before they come
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: to you, because if you're the one putting your hand up,
• 14:18
  Speaker 4: they're like, oh, thanks so much, money at Ourist, We
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: would like to help you there, whereas if they're coming
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: to you being like money at Ourist, we have, you know,
• 14:25
  Speaker 4: got a record that you haven't done it here, here,
• 14:27
  Speaker 4: and here. That feels a lot more stressful.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: Yes it does. And yeah, while it was, you know,
• 14:31
  Speaker 2: an awful thing. It allowed us to open up that
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: part of our relationship to talk about money and for
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: me to be like, do you need help? Can I
• 14:37
  Speaker 2: help you? And for him to be able to say
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: yes to that. So it was quite a defining moment
• 14:42
  Speaker 2: for us, which I look back fondly on now.
• 14:44
  Speaker 4: Yeah, oh my gosh, I love that for you guys,
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: And now what does your money story look like? Together?
• 14:49
  Speaker 2: So together we work as a team. So I, you know,
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: do a lot of the organization stuff, but I also
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: consult with him to make sure that our values are aligned,
• 14:57
  Speaker 2: to make sure that he's feeling heard when we're planning
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: for our future, to make sure that he understands where
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: our money's going. So it's not just me doing it
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: and him being completely in the dark. He you know,
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: knows all our accounts, all our goals, how we're moving
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: and tracking towards all those things. I will admit it's
• 15:11
  Speaker 2: been a bit of a build of two years. So
• 15:13
  Speaker 2: when we bought together, he still had a house, so
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: we had two mortgages for a while. During the epic
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: rate rise of twenty two to twenty three.
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: Oh no, thank you.
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: It was a big learning curve because while I, you know,
• 15:26
  Speaker 2: think I'm good with money, I've never had to deal
• 15:28
  Speaker 2: with that much and that much debt and that much
• 15:30
  Speaker 2: you know, movement before.
• 15:31
  Speaker 4: So it was and that becomes stressful, like that becomes
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: genuine pressure. It's not oh, we would love to save
• 15:37
  Speaker 4: and buy a house. It becomes next month, you have
• 15:40
  Speaker 4: a very large sum of money, do you how are
• 15:42
  Speaker 4: you paying it?
• 15:43
  Speaker 2: Yeap, one hundred percent. And then after we managed to
• 15:46
  Speaker 2: sell his house, we got engaged and so yeah, we've
• 15:51
  Speaker 2: been married four months as of yesterday.
• 15:53
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, congratulations, thank you.
• 15:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It was a beautiful time but also a very expensive,
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: stressful times.
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: So yeah, absolutely, but it's over now. It's over now,
• 16:02
  Speaker 4: you don't have to have another wedding. So many drus.
• 16:05
  Speaker 4: What are your big goals? What are you currently working
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: towards now.
• 16:08
  Speaker 2: So we didn't go into debt for the wedding, which
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: is great, but we did dip into our savings a bit,
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: so we are trying to put that back together. But
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: after that, the next big goal is land and building
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: the forever dream home.
• 16:20
  Speaker 4: Oh what does that look like? How long do you
• 16:22
  Speaker 4: think that'll take?
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: My plan? I would like it in five, but it's
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: probably more ten years for us, just with the current
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: mortgage that we have, which is a little bit higher
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: than we anticipate buying together. So probably a ten year
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: plan to get that one done.
• 16:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I love that. I feel like it's so nice
• 16:39
  Speaker 4: to hear someone go, you know what, that's probably a
• 16:41
  Speaker 4: ten year plan, but it's still on the cards. You're
• 16:44
  Speaker 4: still working towards it. Tell me you said something there
• 16:47
  Speaker 4: that I want to dive a little bit deeper into.
• 16:49
  Speaker 4: You said, the mortgage is a little bit more than
• 16:51
  Speaker 4: what we had anticipated. Why is that? How did that happen?
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: So? Originally when we decided that we were endgame, we
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: wanted to buy it together, but we were hoping to
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: utilize myself for the first home buy stamp duty exemption
• 17:04
  Speaker 2: in our state. So we're hoping to buy with just
• 17:06
  Speaker 2: my name on the title to you know it can
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: be twenty k thirty k, like it's quite large.
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a good deal, but where we.
• 17:13
  Speaker 2: Were looking to buy, it just wasn't feasible to get
• 17:16
  Speaker 2: something that wouldn't require work. And my partner and I
• 17:19
  Speaker 2: realized we love each other, but we probably can't rento together.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: We probably cannot.
• 17:25
  Speaker 4: My husband and I are going through that right now
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: and it's testing yeap, Like I'm grateful, don't get me wrong.
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: And it can be super fun, but it's also super stressful.
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: Yes, yes, I can only imagine, and yes, we do
• 17:38
  Speaker 2: love each other. We do have strengths we but.
• 17:40
  Speaker 4: Knowing that is really important and a little bit more
• 17:43
  Speaker 4: debt and knowing that your relationship is not going to
• 17:46
  Speaker 4: suffer because of it. She's a smart woman.
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: That's the decision we made. We ideally should have stayed
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: in his home that he had by himself, which was
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: his family home that he purchased, but it needed work
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: and love that we couldn't give it as a fresh couple.
• 18:00
  Speaker 4: That's fair, all right. I want to know what do
• 18:01
  Speaker 4: you do for? How much money do you earn?
• 18:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah? So I work in state government in primary industries
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: and I earn one hundred and twenty thousand a year
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: and my partner is in mining and he works one
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: hundred and sixty thousand a year.
• 18:13
  Speaker 4: Oh very nice, plus super yeah, oh plus super. Does
• 18:17
  Speaker 4: he also get bonuses?
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: Yes? He does production targets? Yes?
• 18:20
  Speaker 4: Ah, how exciting? And what did they look like?
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: I think his last bonus was five thousand for the
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: year for meeting their production targets, or it could have
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: been six monthly.
• 18:29
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that's so good. And do you get any type
• 18:31
  Speaker 4: of bonuses? I don't believe you doing government right.
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: No, we do get things like leaveloading, which is a
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: little bit extra, and we do usually increase with CPI
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: each year as well, so we usually guaranteed that increase
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: so it keeps up.
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: Okay, that is nice. Now tell me a little bit
• 18:45
  Speaker 4: more about that, because I am a really big fan
• 18:48
  Speaker 4: of salaries increasing with CPI. Is that written into your contract?
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: No? Through our union?
• 18:54
  Speaker 4: Right? I love this? And is there a lot of
• 18:57
  Speaker 4: pushback from the organization from the union And how did
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: that go? Because I know that lots of people have
• 19:04
  Speaker 4: been having these prickly conversations over the last I think
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: twelve to twenty four months, I'd say, oh.
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure. So I believe we're still a negotiation
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: for this year's CPI increased. But last year's was very
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: profitable for us. I believe we got four point five
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: backdated per saying increase to keep up with the inflation
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: for last year, so that was awesome. But yet we're
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: still looking at this year's negotiations. But I know my
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: partner's mind is also going into negotiations as well for
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: their they're on a contract agreement, so they're going into
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: negotiations for their salaries as well. So we should have
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: a result of that by the end of the year,
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: which should look like a nice increase as well.
• 19:39
  Speaker 4: Erelate, I love that so much. I mean, I don't
• 19:42
  Speaker 4: love hearing that it was four point five percent. I'm
• 19:44
  Speaker 4: glad that you're happy with that and that, like, obviously
• 19:46
  Speaker 4: that's much better than most people are getting. But let's
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: not forget that inflation was seven point one percent, so
• 19:51
  Speaker 4: that doesn't exactly keep up, but it does meet more
• 19:55
  Speaker 4: than half of it, So I mean, it's better than
• 19:57
  Speaker 4: a kick in the pants. Is that what we'll all
• 20:00
  Speaker 4: we're going with?
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: Oh?
• 20:01
  Speaker 4: Agree, let's go to a really quick break on the
• 20:03
  Speaker 4: flip side. I want to dive in. I want to
• 20:04
  Speaker 4: know so much more about these properties, your in investments.
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: I want to know your best and worst money habits.
• 20:09
  Speaker 4: And I feel like I have some more relationship questions
• 20:11
  Speaker 4: for you. So guys, don't go anywhere money diarist. We
• 20:18
  Speaker 4: are back and I want to know are you guys investing?
• 20:21
  Speaker 4: If so, how what does that look like?
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: So currently, no, we are not investing, but it is
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: in the immediate future for us. So I have mentioned
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: that when we bought a house together, my partner had
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: a house and we did get a small profit from
• 20:36
  Speaker 2: that sale, about one hundred K that we have held
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: onto with the intention of investing it.
• 20:41
  Speaker 4: Oh how cool.
• 20:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just been a leap we haven't been able
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: to take yet or been comfortable to take here.
• 20:47
  Speaker 4: Oh of course. And will you guys do like property
• 20:50
  Speaker 4: investing or share investing or what does that look like
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: or just no idea yet?
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: We intend to go into shares. We do have a
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: financial advisor in the family. We were hoping to utilize
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: some expertise there to help.
• 21:02
  Speaker 4: The amazing I love that for you guys.
• 21:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so that would be the goal and then we'd
• 21:08
  Speaker 2: continually each month put money into that account once we
• 21:10
  Speaker 2: set that up.
• 21:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah, all right, I want to jump into your debt era.
• 21:14
  Speaker 4: So at the start of the episode you said v
• 21:16
  Speaker 4: I'm in my debt era, and I loved it because
• 21:19
  Speaker 4: one it's really blunt, but two it's just an era.
• 21:22
  Speaker 4: We're just going through this. So can you break down
• 21:24
  Speaker 4: what debt you currently have?
• 21:26
  Speaker 2: Sure? Ken, So we have one car loan worth forty thousand.
• 21:30
  Speaker 2: We have a mortgage which is technically split intwo so
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: we have a variable mortgage at one hundred and sixty
• 21:35
  Speaker 2: seven thousand and then a fixed mortgage at five hundred
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: and eighty thousand, and then I also have my HEX.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: Now this is something I'm not proud of. I did
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: do two degrees and I did max out my HEX.
• 21:45
  Speaker 2: So I do have one hundred and twenty thousand in
• 21:47
  Speaker 2: he so did I.
• 21:48
  Speaker 4: Yeah, don't worry. Don't worry there. Oh there, Mine has
• 21:53
  Speaker 4: just big flex from me. Mine's just dropped under six figures.
• 21:56
  Speaker 4: So that's prank.
• 21:57
  Speaker 2: God, that is a congratulations.
• 22:00
  Speaker 4: I know I'm still up to my eyeballs in HEXTEBT.
• 22:04
  Speaker 4: Have I paid off any extra? No, because I have
• 22:06
  Speaker 4: bigger financial goals at play and I'm just grateful that
• 22:09
  Speaker 4: the government is letting me do that. But I feel
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: like it's done me well so far. And I mean,
• 22:14
  Speaker 4: you you are doing very well. You earn one twenty
• 22:17
  Speaker 4: plus supers. Still like, I'm not upset for you.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: Thank you?
• 22:21
  Speaker 4: Sorry? Not sorry? What other debt do you have?
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: That? Is it? That's what we have? Yeah?
• 22:25
  Speaker 4: I love that. So tell me how did you guys
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: decide to get a car loan for forty grand? That's
• 22:30
  Speaker 4: pretty reasonable as a car loan it is.
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: That was a little bit of a personal decision. So
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: my partner has his own car, which is all paid off.
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: It's a work car. It will be driven till it dies,
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: and it won't die, you know, probably before us. I
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: tell you that. It's a Toyota.
• 22:45
  Speaker 4: My dad always used to say that. He'd be like, well,
• 22:47
  Speaker 4: if you're a reliable car, you're obviously going to have
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: to buy a Toyota. My first car was a Toyota too,
• 22:52
  Speaker 4: a not very attractive one. I'm not gonna lie. I
• 22:54
  Speaker 4: wish I could be like, oh I had a really
• 22:56
  Speaker 4: cute Camri or I had like a Corolla or something. No,
• 22:59
  Speaker 4: I don't know if people know what a Toyota Avalon is.
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: But like that's what I do.
• 23:05
  Speaker 2: Oh beautiful, yes, stunning, right, yep, I can see it
• 23:08
  Speaker 2: in my mind's eye.
• 23:10
  Speaker 4: I sold it for a very hefty profit of get this,
• 23:13
  Speaker 4: five hundred dollars.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: Of You can't go past the Toyot big dog. But yeah,
• 23:19
  Speaker 2: So because we had that, we decided that we did
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: want to spend a little bit and have a nice car,
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: have that car for a good few years and enjoy
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: it before we have a family. That was the thought
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: as well. So we did buy a little BMW and
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: I had a car that sold literally for what I
• 23:35
  Speaker 2: bought it for brand new. It was a Mazda. I
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: bought it for thirty five and I sold it for
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: thirty two and a half. Like, yeah, it was ridiculous.
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: So it was a really good time for us if
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: we were going to upgrade to upgrade.
• 23:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah, how exciting, you dropped. We want to have a
• 23:49
  Speaker 4: family at some point, what does that look like.
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: I've actually been listening to your pods Victoria and all
• 23:54
  Speaker 2: the family financials. So yeah, we do want to look
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: into starting a family next year.
• 23:59
  Speaker 4: So how exciting.
• 24:01
  Speaker 2: I know, I'm very excited. It's daunting that. I'm very excited.
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: I've already got the spreadsheet together.
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: It's the best thing in the entire world. Like, I
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: don't think it's very lame. And historically, whenever i'd hear
• 24:13
  Speaker 4: people be like I love being a mom, I'd be like, yeah,
• 24:15
  Speaker 4: all right, cool, Like I didn't get it, get it.
• 24:18
  Speaker 4: And now I'm a mom, I'm like, why didn't you
• 24:20
  Speaker 4: guys tell me? Like, why didn't you tell me how
• 24:22
  Speaker 4: cool this was?
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: That's very comforting to hear. I'm very excited.
• 24:26
  Speaker 4: Oh it's so good. It's so good, you're going to
• 24:28
  Speaker 4: adore it. But I want to know, given you're planning
• 24:31
  Speaker 4: on starting a family, and in your money story that
• 24:34
  Speaker 4: you wrote into us, you said my partner discovered an
• 24:38
  Speaker 4: act of financial abuse against him which changed his relationship
• 24:41
  Speaker 4: with his parents forever. That was a big bomb to drop.
• 24:45
  Speaker 4: And with the idea that you're planning a family, like,
• 24:48
  Speaker 4: can we dive a little bit deeper into what was
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: that bomb? And how are you going to be managing
• 24:54
  Speaker 4: money as children to the family.
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a great question. So, as mentioned, when my
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: partner and I decided to buy together, he had a
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: house previously. The house that he had was his family
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: home that he had purchased from his mum and his stepdad.
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: At the time that he purchased the home, as I mentioned,
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: he's not one for paperwork. He's not one for looking
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: anything over. They needed the purchase to go through so
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: they could move to a new state and start a
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: new life, and he trusted them with that sale, and
• 25:22
  Speaker 2: they had it valued by the local agent, and he
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: signed the mortgage documents that they'd all organized for him.
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: And it wasn't until we went to Selley's home and
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: we had it valued, you know, seven years later by
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: that same local agent that he let him know that
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: he did the original valuation and he had way way overpaid.
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: He had overpaid by one hundred thousand dollars what yep,
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: So the local agent did the valuation put it at
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: mid threes and he signed paperwork for a private sale
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: at mid fours. And when he confronted his mum and
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: his stepfather about it, the stepfather had no idea. He
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: thought that the sale had gone through at the mid
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: three hundred price point. And it turns out that yep,
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: his mum had changed that figure.
• 26:08
  Speaker 4: And what he just paid her more, And like I'm
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: so pervy. I'm so sorry, Deely. Okay, you're anonymous and
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: you couldn't ask this at brunch, so like, this is
• 26:18
  Speaker 4: why I'm asking now. So did his mom take off
• 26:21
  Speaker 4: with an extra one hundred grand off the top or
• 26:23
  Speaker 4: like what happened to that extra cash?
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she took it. It went into their new life,
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: the home that they bought in the New state, the
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: cars that they bought. Stepdad was just oblivious to it
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: all about where it had all come from because they
• 26:35
  Speaker 2: rebought with the mortgage, so it just yep. So when
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: he confronted them after the fact, Stepdad didn't realize thought
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: it was still at that lower price that they the
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: price that they've been valued by the local agent. And
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: mom said, no, no, we repainted it was you know,
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: worth the more. And my partner's like, it's not worth
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: a hundred thousand dollars through paint job.
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: Absolutely not.
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, since that time it was a you know, strained
• 26:58
  Speaker 2: relationship to start with, but where yeah, he's decided to
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: go no contact since then.
• 27:02
  Speaker 4: That is heartbreaking that somebody's parent could do that to them.
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: I mean, sadly, it's not an uncommon theme that happens
• 27:10
  Speaker 4: in the world, but that is why obviously he was heartbroken.
• 27:15
  Speaker 4: Do we know what the property is valued at now,
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: like is there something that's slowly bouncing back or is
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: he still at a massive loss about this.
• 27:22
  Speaker 2: We did sell it for a profit, so, oh thank
• 27:25
  Speaker 2: god it was Actually it was. It was quite amazing.
• 27:27
  Speaker 2: So part of the reason we got rid of it
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: is because of that emotional attachment that was.
• 27:31
  Speaker 4: It's got bad karma. Sitting on it feels high percent.
• 27:34
  Speaker 2: But we sold off market the day we got the
• 27:37
  Speaker 2: photos done. Before it went on market, someone came through
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: and offered full price.
• 27:41
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, Yeah.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: It was awesome. It went for five ninety.
• 27:44
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh money. When you guys would have been
• 27:46
  Speaker 4: over the moon, especially after hearing that it was valued
• 27:50
  Speaker 4: at three fifty and you paid four fifty, Like to
• 27:52
  Speaker 4: get another one hundred plus grand on top of that
• 27:54
  Speaker 4: would have just been so relieving. I know it should
• 27:56
  Speaker 4: have been more, but at least you weren't in the
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: red right.
• 28:00
  Speaker 2: Was tainted by unfortunately that discovery. It will assist to
• 28:03
  Speaker 2: set us up, but you know, it could have been
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: so much more life changing for us in our future family.
• 28:07
  Speaker 2: But you know, it is what it is. You've got
• 28:09
  Speaker 2: to run with those wins. Yeah.
• 28:11
  Speaker 4: Wow, it was an expensive lesson And how does your
• 28:14
  Speaker 4: partner feel about that?
• 28:15
  Speaker 2: Now? He is trying to teach his younger sisters better
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: habits and better ways of working, and trying to open
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: their eyes like he's weren't at the time, so that
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: they can make better choices and not be influenced by
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: these family members moving forward. So he's taking it as
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: a learning and he's yeah, really growing from it, which
• 28:33
  Speaker 2: is beautiful.
• 28:34
  Speaker 4: Saying yeah, but it's also just it's so sad, but
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: I think it will instill such good values in him
• 28:40
  Speaker 4: when he and you become parents, because you're just going,
• 28:43
  Speaker 4: this is not how I'd ever want my kids to
• 28:45
  Speaker 4: feel or you know, work that way. That's just absolutely heartbreaking.
• 28:50
  Speaker 4: But out of it, I'm sure you guys have become
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: really good at money, which segues me very nicely into asking,
• 28:56
  Speaker 4: what do you think your best money habits are? I
• 28:58
  Speaker 4: want yours and his?
• 28:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I think my best money habit is tracking
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: and planning. I have a manual tracker which I track
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: everything down to the dollar and personally categorized for us.
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, love.
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we were able to self fund so our wedding
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: was sixty five thousand dollars. It was very expensive, and
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: we did split some of that with my parents. But
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: over twelve months we were able to fund you know,
• 29:20
  Speaker 2: the thirty to forty grand difference, just by being smart.
• 29:23
  Speaker 4: Wait, you paid for your wedding in cash and it
• 29:25
  Speaker 4: was that much cash. Ship, Oh that is very sexy
• 29:29
  Speaker 4: money direst.
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: It took a lot, Victoria, I will tell you it
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: was a hard twelve months. But it was by this
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: tracking and having everything interconnected and not being able to
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: put our heads in the sands from the growing bills
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: that allowed us to be able to do that.
• 29:42
  Speaker 4: But how good You're not starting your marriage in debt,
• 29:45
  Speaker 4: like you're just starting ahead and I mean you've already
• 29:48
  Speaker 4: got like some assets and you guys are building everything up.
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: But like the idea that people and don't get me wrong, like,
• 29:54
  Speaker 4: I'm not here to shame anybody's values. If someone's like they,
• 29:57
  Speaker 4: I have thought about it well and truly, and we're
• 29:59
  Speaker 4: going into debt for our wedding, all power to you, Like,
• 30:02
  Speaker 4: go for it. You do what is best for you.
• 30:04
  Speaker 4: My job is actually to give you all the tools
• 30:06
  Speaker 4: and resources and lay them out on a table, so
• 30:08
  Speaker 4: that should you want to use them, you can, but
• 30:11
  Speaker 4: you don't have to. Like everyone's different. But I love
• 30:14
  Speaker 4: this idea that people would start fresh in a relationship
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: or take their relationship to the next level without having
• 30:22
  Speaker 4: debt to pay back a wedding because it's to me,
• 30:25
  Speaker 4: it's an item that you don't get a lot out of, Like, yes,
• 30:27
  Speaker 4: I got married, but I don't have an asset that's
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: going to increase in value, Like I can't sell my marriage,
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: can I agree?
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: And after coming through that, you know, twelve month period
• 30:36
  Speaker 2: of two mortgages in that extreme stress, I couldn't imagine
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: a relationship with that much money stress in it. So
• 30:43
  Speaker 2: that was really important for us.
• 30:44
  Speaker 4: What an icon? So what's your partner's best money habit?
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: Is it? You?
• 30:48
  Speaker 4: Are you his best habit? Because I feel like that's
• 30:50
  Speaker 4: where this is going.
• 30:52
  Speaker 2: I think that's part of it. But also one thing
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: he does tell me is and I learned from the
• 30:56
  Speaker 2: pod and he keeps instealing a me, is our money values.
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: We can't be so focused on our goals and our
• 31:00
  Speaker 2: plans in our future that we forget the now and
• 31:03
  Speaker 2: what brings us happiness. So you know, he makes sure
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: that you know, we have a big value around food,
• 31:08
  Speaker 2: not necessarily McDonald's, but we like to spend eating out
• 31:12
  Speaker 2: and so we have to budget for it. Otherwise we
• 31:14
  Speaker 2: feel the guilt around something that we love and it's
• 31:16
  Speaker 2: just not worth it. So he helps keep me grounded.
• 31:19
  Speaker 4: It's about the journey. It's literally about the journey. Like
• 31:23
  Speaker 4: the tagline of my I have a mortgage broking business,
• 31:25
  Speaker 4: which people should know by now because it's all I
• 31:28
  Speaker 4: talk about, but the tagline of Zella Money is literally
• 31:31
  Speaker 4: it's your journey because it's like so important to make
• 31:34
  Speaker 4: sure that we're not just trying to buy the biggest,
• 31:36
  Speaker 4: best house, but we are trying to find a really
• 31:39
  Speaker 4: nice balance of creating wealth buying property but also enjoying
• 31:44
  Speaker 4: that journey because like I say this all the time
• 31:45
  Speaker 4: and it sounds a little bit I don't know, hippy dippy,
• 31:48
  Speaker 4: but like old age is a privilege that's denied to
• 31:52
  Speaker 4: so many people, and to not experience the journey to
• 31:56
  Speaker 4: its fullest extent along the way, like I don't want
• 31:59
  Speaker 4: to get to see and be like, wow, I'm super
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: rich now, Glad I skipped out on all those brunches
• 32:04
  Speaker 4: and family time. Glad I didn't have any you know,
• 32:07
  Speaker 4: friend memories. Glad I didn't go on all those family
• 32:09
  Speaker 4: holidays that we we didn't go on. Like, I just
• 32:13
  Speaker 4: there's so much about life that we should be enjoying,
• 32:16
  Speaker 4: and I just go, you know, if it's not for you,
• 32:19
  Speaker 4: that's not for you. Like if you're one of those
• 32:21
  Speaker 4: people in you know, the fire movement, so like financial independence,
• 32:24
  Speaker 4: retire early. If that's for you, fantastic, just not for me.
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: Agreed, Yeah, we're the same. We thought about it, how
• 32:30
  Speaker 2: to try of it, and we just we love life
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: too much.
• 32:34
  Speaker 4: I mean, you had so much sacrifice leading up to
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: your wedding. You were probably like, this sounded great in theory,
• 32:40
  Speaker 4: not for me. We tried it. Let's do the journey.
• 32:43
  Speaker 2: Part one hundred percent. That was exactly us.
• 32:46
  Speaker 4: So I love that, all right. Flip the narrative. What's
• 32:49
  Speaker 4: your worst money habit?
• 32:50
  Speaker 2: I have a love language of gift giving. Oh same,
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: it's show. Look I'm getting better at it and learning
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: how to work around it in terms of you know,
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: starting early, waiting for sales, picking items. But I budget
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: five thousand dollars for Christmas every year and we don't
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: oh my god, we don't have children. Yep, that's okay.
• 33:11
  Speaker 4: I'm sorry. You can't drop that. You can't drop that
• 33:13
  Speaker 4: on me and then not give me a breakdown? Who like,
• 33:16
  Speaker 4: I don't even spend five grand for Christmas? What's the breakdown?
• 33:20
  Speaker 4: Look like?
• 33:20
  Speaker 3: Like?
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: What are people getting? Is everyone? Do you just turn
• 33:23
  Speaker 4: up to Christmas and you're like, i'd oprah a car
• 33:26
  Speaker 4: for you, a car for you? You guys get air wraps?
• 33:28
  Speaker 4: Like what's Christmas?
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: Like?
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's look it's somewhat like that. Like if my
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: mum wants the new dice and air wrapp or hair dryer, like,
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: I can't not because I know it's something she wants.
• 33:38
  Speaker 2: I find it really difficult within me to not do it,
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: even if I know it's, you know, a big budgetary spend,
• 33:44
  Speaker 2: and yet with my cousins are going through their kid era,
• 33:46
  Speaker 2: so we've got lots of little people running around and
• 33:49
  Speaker 2: I just can't not. I find it really difficult because
• 33:51
  Speaker 2: it is, you know, my way of saying I love
• 33:53
  Speaker 2: you because I've thought about you, and I've got you
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: something you really want and that you know shows that
• 33:57
  Speaker 2: I know you.
• 33:58
  Speaker 4: I love that though, and I love that you've budgeted
• 34:00
  Speaker 4: for it. It's not like, oh, every Christmas we completely
• 34:03
  Speaker 4: blow out because like, I need to be better next year.
• 34:05
  Speaker 4: You're like, nope, my love language actually is gift giving
• 34:08
  Speaker 4: and I have to allocate a big budget to this
• 34:10
  Speaker 4: because it actually gives me as much joy as it
• 34:13
  Speaker 4: gives the other people that it goes to. So I'm
• 34:15
  Speaker 4: not mad about that. That's not the worst.
• 34:16
  Speaker 2: Table, thank you. I'll take that.
• 34:19
  Speaker 4: People have spent more on least. So I'm telling you, now, yep,
• 34:23
  Speaker 4: what do you think your partner's worst habit is? Please
• 34:26
  Speaker 4: tell me he also is a gift giver.
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: Up, yes he is, but he doesn't do the planning
• 34:31
  Speaker 2: that I do, so we can to overspend because he'll
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: just pick it up when he sees it hasn't thought
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: about it, hasn't picked up in the sales. Impulse shopping
• 34:37
  Speaker 2: is my partner's worst habit and it's what has you know,
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: left him over the last few years, not being able
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: to put savings together. I put it down to, you know,
• 34:45
  Speaker 2: being denied as a kid. So as soon as you
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: got your own money, he doesn't deny himself. You know,
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: we're trying to work towards you know, if we can't
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: do this thing this week, good to wait till payday.
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: He struggles with that, that waiting, you know, even if
• 34:58
  Speaker 2: we've got the money there, but it's in a different category.
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: He struggles with that. So that's his worst habit is
• 35:02
  Speaker 2: that impulse spending.
• 35:04
  Speaker 4: But it's good to be aware of it. And I
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: like that as his partner, you're aware of it as well,
• 35:08
  Speaker 4: because it means that there's probably been some really good
• 35:11
  Speaker 4: conversations about it, and you guys are on the same page,
• 35:14
  Speaker 4: and you're probably implementing strategies that can help minimize that.
• 35:18
  Speaker 4: Am I right?
• 35:18
  Speaker 2: Yes, you are one hundred percent correct. It's been a
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: really long journey, but one worth having to put us
• 35:23
  Speaker 2: in the place that we're in.
• 35:24
  Speaker 4: I love it money, diarist. I need to know more.
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: At the start, you said, v I think like a C,
• 35:31
  Speaker 4: like between the two of us, like we're a C.
• 35:33
  Speaker 4: But then I'm thinking, okay, cool, great, tell me more.
• 35:37
  Speaker 4: And you said, I mean my debt era, and I'm thinking, okay, cool.
• 35:39
  Speaker 4: Like she's probably got a few personal loans, maybe a
• 35:42
  Speaker 4: credit card, because that's what debt era made me think of.
• 35:46
  Speaker 4: But it's not the case. You have a mortgage. You
• 35:48
  Speaker 4: actually have one hundred grand sitting to the side to invest.
• 35:51
  Speaker 4: You've got a forty thousand dollars car loan, which, as
• 35:54
  Speaker 4: you guys said, was a very conscious decision. It wasn't like,
• 35:57
  Speaker 4: oh damn v we accidentally got a car loan because
• 35:59
  Speaker 4: we didn't have a financial education and we regret it massively.
• 36:02
  Speaker 4: You were like, actually, we're enjoying the journey, like we
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: are loving life pre kids, and we wanted a little
• 36:07
  Speaker 4: bit and w to have a good life like Slay.
• 36:10
  Speaker 4: You guys earn more than enough to justify a purchase
• 36:13
  Speaker 4: like that. You guys know so much about not only
• 36:16
  Speaker 4: your money story, but your partner's money story, and I
• 36:19
  Speaker 4: think that that's really empowering. Like I look at that
• 36:21
  Speaker 4: and I go, I wish everybody was able to sit
• 36:25
  Speaker 4: down with their partner and go, well, how did you
• 36:27
  Speaker 4: grow up around money? And I know that yours probably
• 36:29
  Speaker 4: came as a consequence of learning about the financial abuse
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: that your partner went through, so you know, up until
• 36:36
  Speaker 4: that point he probably wasn't as forthcoming. But then you know,
• 36:39
  Speaker 4: when something happens, or when something triggers an outpour of
• 36:43
  Speaker 4: like okay, cool. Well, actually, as much as it's very negative,
• 36:46
  Speaker 4: I think it's been very positive and it's going to
• 36:48
  Speaker 4: mean that you become even wealthier over time. But I
• 36:51
  Speaker 4: just feel like you're an icon. Like paying a sixty
• 36:55
  Speaker 4: five thousand dollar wedding in cash, and I know you
• 36:57
  Speaker 4: said your parents helped out a bit, but that was
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: still what you paying forty five thousand dollars in cash,
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: Like most people can't save that over twelve months. Be
• 37:05
  Speaker 4: for real. I know it took some serious, you know,
• 37:08
  Speaker 4: motivation and restriction on your end, but what like hearing
• 37:14
  Speaker 4: this back money darist, are you sure you're a c.
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: Now that you put it that way, Victoria, I do
• 37:21
  Speaker 2: feel we could probably bump that up. I still believe
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: that there's room for us once we move past this,
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: you know, our highest debt era point to get better.
• 37:29
  Speaker 4: But yeah, but that's fine, Like most of it is
• 37:32
  Speaker 4: wealth creating debt. Yes, yeah, and that's very sexy. But
• 37:36
  Speaker 4: I love that for you. I'm very excited about it.
• 37:39
  Speaker 4: But I just think, oh my gosh, what would it
• 37:42
  Speaker 4: take for you to say, oh, v we're in a family,
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: like we absolutely we're smashing it, Like what would that take?
• 37:49
  Speaker 2: I probably think the car debt, we do, you know,
• 37:51
  Speaker 2: our ventual goal is to have you know, nice cars,
• 37:54
  Speaker 2: but not have the debt attached to it, So that
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: may take a few years for us to get to
• 37:58
  Speaker 2: that point. That would be where I would see us
• 38:00
  Speaker 2: moving into that a territory. You know.
• 38:03
  Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I totally get it. I want to be
• 38:05
  Speaker 4: a little bit pervy and go back and ask a
• 38:06
  Speaker 4: question that I completely forgot to ask talking about that
• 38:10
  Speaker 4: car debt, what kind of interest rate are you paying
• 38:13
  Speaker 4: on that car loan?
• 38:14
  Speaker 2: It was quite high, higher than I expected. I believe
• 38:17
  Speaker 2: it was eight to nine percent.
• 38:18
  Speaker 4: And do you know what the average rate of return
• 38:21
  Speaker 4: on the Australian share market is?
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: I do not, actually, Victorian, I probably should.
• 38:25
  Speaker 4: No, no, no, no, you shouldn't know. I'm the finance girlie,
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: not you. But my job is to educate you. And
• 38:31
  Speaker 4: if your car loan is eight to nine percent, now
• 38:34
  Speaker 4: this is not financial advice, This is just food for thought. Right,
• 38:38
  Speaker 4: If your car loan is eight to nine percent and
• 38:40
  Speaker 4: the Australian share market on average returns just over nine
• 38:44
  Speaker 4: percent per annum, do you think it might be worth
• 38:47
  Speaker 4: considering using some of that one hundred thousand dollars profit
• 38:51
  Speaker 4: to consider putting it towards your car loan to put
• 38:55
  Speaker 4: you ultimately in a better financial position. I'm not saying yes, no.
• 38:59
  Speaker 4: Maybe you have a financial advisor in the family. Maybe
• 39:02
  Speaker 4: that's a question for them. But I look at it
• 39:03
  Speaker 4: and I go, there might be some and I'm assuming
• 39:06
  Speaker 4: there's probably some emotional attachment to that hundred thousand dollar
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: profit and wanting to invest it for your future. But
• 39:12
  Speaker 4: what if you took the amount that you're paying off
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: on your car loan and started that as your investment stream.
• 39:17
  Speaker 4: Just food for thought.
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a really good point, and it's something we considered,
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: but you're one hundred percent right. I have left that
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: decision to my partner, and it is an emotional one
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: because it was his profit, his you know, emotional trauma.
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: That kind of you know, brought it about.
• 39:32
  Speaker 4: One hundred percent, and that's why I was like, but also,
• 39:35
  Speaker 4: there's probably an emotional overlay here, and you know, I
• 39:38
  Speaker 4: wanted to bring it up now because talking through these
• 39:41
  Speaker 4: things is not as simple as you might think. Like,
• 39:44
  Speaker 4: I'm pretty sure that someone somewhere was listening and they're like,
• 39:47
  Speaker 4: what are they doing? They've got one hundred grand sitting
• 39:49
  Speaker 4: in a savings account and have a car loan like
• 39:52
  Speaker 4: paid off but that's why I was like, hold on,
• 39:55
  Speaker 4: hold on, why haven't we done that?
• 39:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's my partner feels comfortable with that as a
• 39:58
  Speaker 2: safety net. That's also we haven't invested it just yet either,
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: because we've had that for a year eighteen months now.
• 40:06
  Speaker 4: One hundred percent, and just knowing that tomorrow, if you
• 40:08
  Speaker 4: woke up and you're like, oh my gosh, we are
• 40:10
  Speaker 4: in a bigger financial pickle for some reason you lost
• 40:12
  Speaker 4: your jobs, you could extinguish that debt tomorrow. And that's
• 40:15
  Speaker 4: quite empowering. So I think that that is, you know,
• 40:19
  Speaker 4: obviously a very good position. The idea that you're having
• 40:21
  Speaker 4: kids hopefully soon, like that would also make me want
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: to sit on some cash through there are and I
• 40:26
  Speaker 4: guess that's where I wanted to lead this question. It's
• 40:29
  Speaker 4: just there are so many reasons why people keep debts,
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: and while the logical on paper answer would be why
• 40:36
  Speaker 4: don't you just get rid of it tomorrow? You could,
• 40:39
  Speaker 4: there's always this emotional overlay of, well, actually, we're trying
• 40:43
  Speaker 4: to live our life in line with our values and
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: how we feel most comfortable. We always need to take
• 40:47
  Speaker 4: that into consideration. So financial advice is not cut and
• 40:51
  Speaker 4: dry and I think that that is a very good
• 40:53
  Speaker 4: lesson to come out of this as well.
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: I agree one hundred percent, and it's something my partner's
• 40:57
  Speaker 2: taught me. My spreadsheets can't make all those kinds of decisions.
• 41:01
  Speaker 4: It's wild. It's so annoying, isn't it. Like I'm so
• 41:04
  Speaker 4: good at spreadsheets. Like if I could give you all
• 41:07
  Speaker 4: the answers, I absolutely would. Sadly I cannot, but moneyed arrest.
• 41:11
  Speaker 4: This has been a pleasure. I have adored this money conversation.
• 41:14
  Speaker 4: I've enjoyed so much learning about your money story. Unfortunately,
• 41:18
  Speaker 4: that is all we have time for today. But I
• 41:21
  Speaker 4: know that our community is going to love this as
• 41:24
  Speaker 4: much as I have loved it. I've just adored getting
• 41:27
  Speaker 4: to know you, so thank.
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: You, Thank you so much, Victoria.
• 41:35
  Speaker 4: The advice shared on She's on the Money is general
• 41:38
  Speaker 4: in nature and does not consider your individual circumstances. She's
• 41:42
  Speaker 4: on the Money exists purely for educational purposes and should
• 41:45
  Speaker 4: not be relied upon to make an investment or financial decision.
• 41:49
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• 41:52
  Speaker 4: the PDS TMD and obtain appropriate financial advice tailored towards
• 41:56
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