Latest / The Hotmomz Lifestyle Podcast / #219: Nervous System Regulation: 7 Signs You're Managing Trauma, Not Healing It (Part 1)

Transcript

#219: Nervous System Regulation: 7 Signs You're Managing Trauma, Not Healing It (Part 1) · The Hotmomz Lifestyle Podcast

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_01: So there is a person, a lot of people, a lot of accounts online talking about nervous system regulation.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_01: For example, listen to this.
• 0:08
  SPEAKER_00: If you are a six or seven-figure business owner and you feel like you cannot handle one more thing, I want you to see about how long you have been saying it will get better when it will get better when my revenue gets to this next level.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: It will get better when my kids are older.
• 0:23
  SPEAKER_00: It will get better when my husband helps more.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: You have been saying that a very long time.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to know something.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_00: It's actually not your circumstances.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's actually you.
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_00: You're the problem.
• 0:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's not just affecting your stress levels, it's affecting your revenue growth.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_00: This is not a manage your stress how-to class that you're coming to.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: This is a proven framework where I'm actually going to give you the competitive advantage that you need in your industry.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_00: And it starts with your nervous system.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_00: My five-day challenge is coming up so soon, and you can get in by commenting challenge below.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: You are.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_00: And then there's this one.
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_00: High capacity does not have to equal high stress.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_00: Let me explain.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_00: You might be one of those people that is waking up at four o'clock in the morning or five o'clock in the morning and you were starting work immediately.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: You're like, I gotta get all this work done before my kids get up.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_00: And then I'm gonna work all day.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna work late.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna work at night.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: Man, I'm gonna laptop over to 11 o'clock.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: You're working a lot.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_00: And your business of making money, it's working, right?
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: You're like, this is working.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_00: I'm the multi-million dollar business or I have the multi-six figure business, my business is glowing.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: How do you like within the way?
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: Let's make your life actually feel.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_00: High capacity to be able to get 100 things done in one day doesn't have to equal high stress.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you are feeling that the only way that your business to make a lot of money is if you work 100 million hours a week and you are waking up super early and saying I'm late working, that actually doesn't have to be your reality.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to learn how to maintain your even become more successful without working more hours and actually enjoying your life, enjoying your family, feeling that you're actually present and available for them.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: I'm only avoid my five day talent.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm not gonna click link below to join.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: So there's that, and then there's this.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, this is what got me.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_00: If you've landed on this page, I'm guessing success isn't the problem.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: Sustainability is you've either already built a multi-six or seven-figure business, you're scaling, or you're leading at a high level in your career.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: But the pace you're operating at is starting to cost you more than it's giving.
• 2:01
  SPEAKER_00: You are leading, you're selling, you're serving, you are showing up, but behind the scenes, you're exhausted, white nestling your days, you are overstimulated, snapping at your family, you were holding it all together with sheer willpower.
• 2:14
  SPEAKER_00: And you're wondering, can I keep growing at this pace without burning out, without blowing up or breaking down?
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_00: If any of that sounded like you, the regulate to elevate five-day challenge was built for you.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_00: Over the last 10 years, I've coached more than a thousand high-performing women, founders, executives, service providers, creators, and I've helped them grow their businesses by expanding the one thing that most programs never address your nervous system capacity.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_00: Because here's the truth your business will never grow beyond your body's ability to hold success.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: And no, this is strategic emotional regulation, capacity building, old person health, and grounded leadership behind performers.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: Let me show you what that actually looks like.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_00: I want you to picture two climbers standing at the base of a mountain.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: Let's call them Judy and Jamie.
• 2:59
  SPEAKER_00: Now, Judy is climbing the mountain and she is living in survival mode.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: She looks successful on the outside, but on behind the scenes, she is sly.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: Her pack is heavy.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_00: She runs on cortisol.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: She reaps instead of responds.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: She's doing everything but feels like she's holding it all together by a thread.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_00: As she comes in the mountain, her sliding is unstable.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: Every step she takes up the mountain costs more than it gives.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: She hustles, she pushes, she sources results, but she's always one moment away from sliding back down the mountain.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_00: Then there's Jamie.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: Same, same ambition, very different results.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_00: She's climbing within a regulated nervous system.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_00: Her steps are steady.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_00: Her energy circulates instead of leaking.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_00: She makes decisions quickly.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_00: She isn't thrown by turbulence or tension.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: She's not climbing harder.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: She's climbing resourced.
• 3:44
  SPEAKER_00: And this side's capacity, not hustle.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: Jamie realized that distress is not a bad honor, actually a business liability.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_00: And she decided to become the kind of woman who could hold more with ease.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: And that is exactly what I'm going to teach you in this challenge.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_00: Or on day one, we're going to talk about your capacity.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: Why don't you keep hitting the same ceilings and how to expand those ceilings?
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Day two, we're going to dive into emotion, how to stop spiraling, overthinking, and reacting in your business.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: Day three, we're going to talk about clarity, how to make calm, confident decisions without self-doubt.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_00: Day four, we will dive into momentum, how to take aligned action consistently without hustle or chaos.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: And on day five, we will talk about your identity, how to become the woman who can hold more wealth, success, and ease.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_00: And in the VIP room, you're not just going to get generic content.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_00: You're getting direct and exclusive coaching with me every single day, where we look at your actual patterns, your business, and what your nervous system is doing behind the scenes.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: You'll get feedback, you'll ask questions, and you will get unstuffed faster than you ever could on your own.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: This is how you scale without losing yourself in the process.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_00: And listen, if now is not the time for VIP, general admission is still an incredible decision.
• 4:42
  SPEAKER_00: We will walk away with tools that change how you read, how you grow, and how you live.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_00: What would take you months of spiraling, doubting, or stalling, we will rewire in just five days.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_00: This challenge is for the woman who's already built something meaningful, but knows she cannot scale her next level from survival mode.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need more hustle.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need another strategy.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: You need your body and your brain to work with you, not against you.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: Your next level is not about doing work.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: It's about becoming the woman who can hold more.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: I cannot wait to coach you inside, regulate to elevate.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so you know, all that sounds great.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_01: And it says you're going from two million to five million, 10k to 20K.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: It changes the way they see all the things and that things are possible.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_01: All this cool stuff, right?
• 5:24
  SPEAKER_01: You're more present.
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_01: Nobody sends you the bill for running on survival mode.
• 5:28
  SPEAKER_01: So we made one for you.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: And it says build to I just work better under pressure, issued out every single day, and always running it like it could all disappear tomorrow, which is costing you your piece four times the amount of rewriting the same email before you hit send.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_01: It's costing you your Tuesday morning.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_01: Then the decision you've been sitting on since summer, it's costing you a quarter of momentum.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: Snapping at your team when replaying it all night is costing you your sleep.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_01: Checking Slack at dinner, it's costing you the people at the table, and then saying yes to a client, boss, board when you meant no, it costing your weekend.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_01: Needing a vacation from your vacation is costing you the vacation.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: And it sometimes is it equals success, it stopped feeling good and it compounds.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: Costs way more than what her course costs.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: And I like how she did that.
• 6:06
  SPEAKER_01: You've been paying the bills for years.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_01: I like how she did this.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_01: This is great.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_01: However, something in me, everything in me is oh, you're not losing your edge, you're just maxed out.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: You love the work, that's what makes it confusing.
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_01: Somewhere along the way, you started feeling like a treadmill that never stops, and capacity is maxed out, the pressure your nervous system can hold before it flips the switch, and you spiral and all that shit, right?
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_01: And she lists out a thing about are you in survival mode?
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: You're decisive for everyone else and frozen your own.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_01: You call it high standards, but your team calls it hovering.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_01: Success stopped feeling good, and you can't say when.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: A day off means checking your phone 40 times.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_01: By 7 p.m., you're short with the people you love most.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_01: You need vacation from your vacation.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_01: And so she teaches capacity, what's been holding you back, and what's it's not your strategy, emotion, how to stop letting your emotional state run your decisions, get clear on everything, give momentum, take a line of action without forcing an identity, how to become the one who can hold it all without burning out.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_01: Like all this is great.
• 6:57
  SPEAKER_01: However, it's not the root issue.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_01: I could nervous system regulation.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_01: This is why I get women all the time that say, I've done all the nervous system regulation stuff.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_01: I've taken the courses and something's still off.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: And a woman, a high performer hormones are the lens in how you see life.
• 7:11
  SPEAKER_01: So if your hormones have been in survival mode, which they have, I'm pretty sure they're not teaching how to restore your adrenals and your thyroid and your the hormones.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure they're not pairing the proper exercise specific to your body needs and your nervous system needs to get you where you want to go.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure they're not telling you which foods are best for your nervous system health, all those things.
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_01: And A, those things matter as well, not just things to mindset work and nervous system work around capacity.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_01: As much as I love this message, I hate to say this to people because it's just not sexy.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_01: And it makes me cry because these women are out there and they're thinking that this is the thing that's gonna help them.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_01: Meanwhile, they have so much trauma and the nervous system regulation works.
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_01: One more management tool that it's kind of like manifestations work.
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_01: It's like when you learn these new spiritual modalities and these new things and management tools and strategies, and all that doesn't heal your trauma.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_01: That doesn't heal the reason why you need to regulate.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_01: And I get emotional because that was so me.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_01: I would have bought this hand over fist and then had some success and wondered why I kept ending up right back where right back in the same spot.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_01: And people who have dysregulated nervous systems and people who live in survival mode, it comes from trauma.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_01: You don't just become dysregulated out of nowhere.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_01: Your nervous system gets trained over time.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_01: It's what we call allostatic load, the cost of being you, the cost of what you're carrying that's invisible.
• 8:28
  SPEAKER_01: The nervous system gets trained by big trauma and by small trauma.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: Accidents, a kitchen accident, a car accident, abuse, emotional, verbal, physical, sexual, financial, loss, violence, betrayal, medical trauma, getting sick out of nowhere, and it changing your whole life, abandonment, major shock, chronic instability.
• 8:45
  SPEAKER_01: And now a step further, you're like, some of those things didn't happen to me.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_01: Do you think they ever happened to your family before you?
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_01: So if you've got signs and symptoms of X, Y, Z, all these things, and you feel like you've addressed the thing, you've got the tools and strategies in the management mode, there's a step you left out, which is the end all be all.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: It is the root issue.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_01: Now, dysregulation in the nervous system also gets trained by micro traumas, being criticized all the time.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_01: When you grew up, things you maybe forgot about, how your mom, how your dad, how your grandparents were.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_01: Like I recently just had an uncle that passed away, and everybody was so sad about it.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_01: Now he was 90 years old.
• 9:19
  SPEAKER_01: First thing I thought was he was an asshole.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_01: He was never nice to me.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_01: He always made fun of me, called me a redneck, told my mom I'd probably end up pregnant at 16, and just so I was like, ah, but I know he was somebody's dad and he was all these things, but oh, he's just funny, that's just his personality.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, but he's critical, being criticized all the time.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_01: Walking, having to walk on eggshells, being emotionally neglected, which most people are very they have no idea they were emotionally neglected.
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_01: But if in in in present days, if you can't remember to eat on time, if you don't eat enough food, if you're not eating enough food tracking or you're not just eating enough food, you were emotionally neglected.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like that's literally where it comes from.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_01: If it's like you didn't grow up with people highly attuned, where your intuitive people around you, it's like, hey, something's up with so and so, and they know how to talk to you and they know how to see you and talk to you.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_01: Most people didn't grow up like that.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_01: Most people, especially Gen Xers, older millennials, and some and most boomers grew up with you don't you don't talk about it.
• 10:10
  SPEAKER_01: You just keep going, you be tough.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_01: Whoops, you do life's hard.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: Having to always be the good one, having to take care of your parents, having to take care of your older, younger siblings, not being allowed to have needs, where latchkey kids, things like that, having unpredictable parents.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_01: If your parents were alcoholic, drink alcohol, needed nicotine, caffeine to survive, grew up with money stress.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_01: You have money stress, you've gone through money stress, religious shame's huge.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: People don't even realize how much religion is traumatic, where you feel bad about yourself if you do this or you don't do something.
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_01: Body shame, growing up with body shame, being bullied in the past, not feeling protected, like not feeling like people have your back.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: And maybe you feel like you've been dogpiled before, feet feeling punished because you're too much.
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: When you finally say the thing, people turn on you or you lose money or something like that.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_01: Having to perform and constantly feel like you're if you don't do this, then it's all gonna fall apart.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_01: Feeling like you're the glue that holds the family together.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_01: Being dismissed when you're afraid.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you're just you're not cold.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_01: That's just whatever.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's not scary.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_01: Just think about this other thing over here.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_01: Or here, you're upset, go watch this thing or look at something else.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Being responsible too young.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_01: All those are also traumas that cause dysregulation.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_01: So there's no strategy, there's no cool, high-performing, let's make$10 million and get our sexy bodies and manifest.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_01: Unfortunately, healing sometimes looks like some of the darker shit.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_01: But once you learn how to address the trauma, trauma, how to address it, I have an easy framework for that that meets you where you're at.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: How to get the right support and tools so you literally can process and handle what you need to handle.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: And in learning to what they don't say is when you start to regulate your nervous system, what happens is things, if you have trauma, it can really get scary because when your body starts feeling safer than your inner child, the traumas that have been suppressed get loud, right?
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_01: They get loud.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_01: So you have to know what to do with them when it comes up and what it looks like.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: Prolonged stress and experiences, like I'm mentioned above, actually affects a child's brain health, their immune system.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_01: I'm one of those.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_01: I was sick all the time growing up.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: And the more I've healed my trauma, the healthier I've gotten.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_01: Being in survival mode, and where is it gonna show up?
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, it's gonna show up in your body.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_01: It's gonna be so hard to get results.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's gonna be so hard to stay on track.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: It's gonna be really hard to even sign up because you felt so much before.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: It's gonna feel overwhelming.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_01: It's very scary.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: And then now you're in complete freeze mode and avoidance.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: Trauma is at the wheel.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_01: And it comes from a body learning that I have to stay ready.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_01: I need to be prepared.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: I shouldn't spend this money because I may need it here or guilty if you're taking time for yourself, all these things.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_01: I have to constantly do this to get that performing.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_01: I have to constantly protect myself, make sure I'm protected.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_01: I can't fully rest or some something's gonna happen, something's gonna fall.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_01: I can't trust that good things are gonna stay good.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: I can't trust people because they may leave, they may try to hurt me, they may be trying to formulate a plot against me, attack me, or shame me or take from me.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_01: So I need to stay on guard.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_01: And then that becomes the baseline.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_01: And then as an adult, what she's gonna say is, I'm just anxious.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_01: This is just how I am.
• 12:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'm always on, busy.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just really bad at being consistent.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_01: I've just got a lot going on right now.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just avoidant or I sabotage, or I just can't stick to things.
• 13:06
  SPEAKER_01: I'm really just too busy.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_01: I have no time to do those tedious things, all those.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like, nope, that's a body that's in survival mode.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_01: That's come that comes from trauma and feeling having sleep issues, sleep problems, feeling on guard, tense, irritability, being easily startled and trouble concentrating, your HRV chronically low, body's not fully down shifting, that that all of that's just survival psychology.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's survival physiology.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_01: That's all it is.
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_01: And the body is just continue acting like there's a threat coming from all places, which leads me back to regulation's cool, but it's not gonna feed the hungry ghost in the closet that caused the dysregulation.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_01: So, what causes extreme dysregulation?
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_01: Big traumas, the obvious stuff, assault, abuse, death, betrayal, medical events, major fear, accidents, chronic low grade trauma, the nothing happened, but I never feel safe childhood.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: And that one's probably the sneakiest.
• 13:55
  SPEAKER_01: And this is what I personally feel like I specialize in my work.
• 13:58
  SPEAKER_01: Unpredictability, whether it was love, money, safety, moods, food, housing, attention, we're all inconsistent.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_01: So your body learns to constantly scan.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_01: Emotional invalidation, parentification, the child being too young, the body learns to never relax, everything falls apart.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: Emotional invalidation when a child's feelings are dismissed, mocked, punished, or ignored.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_01: She learns to override her wrong signals, shame-based environments, religious shame, body shame, money shame, sexuality shame.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_01: Don't be too much programming, the Puritan way, repeated disappointment or betrayal, people promising safety and not delivering that teaches the body not to trust good things.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_01: Ongoing stress without repair, stress is not always the issue.
• 14:30
  SPEAKER_01: Lack of recovery is the nervous system needs constant repair, co-regulation, co-regulation, sleep, deep, restful sleep, rim sleep, food, safety, proper food, safety, structure, truth, truth, meaning you can't sit there and override with fancy affirmations or biblical verses or anything like that, or even regulation techniques.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: You have to be like truth with honest how you feel, knowing that there is a way to that you're gonna be okay no matter what.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_01: That's it.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_01: So dysregulation is the body's old protection system running after the danger's over.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_01: Hello, trauma.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_01: So trauma is gonna explain why she's in survival mode, and that's why she needs regulation work.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_01: And everybody's like, I don't want to go there.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna open that up.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have trauma.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like, okay, cool.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_01: Then you can just keep performing and being as productive, whatever it is.
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_01: You're eventually gonna get the bill.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_01: You're eventually, you're gonna have to pay the piper.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's like people are selling right now, just regulate enough so you can keep performing and hit the next goal.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not gonna do that.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: You're gonna hit the next goal, but you're gonna be fucking solid at your core.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's like they they teach, oh, breathe so you don't snap.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_01: Meditate.
• 15:33
  SPEAKER_01: Meditate so you can scale.
• 15:35
  SPEAKER_01: Here's what it does for you.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_01: Cold plunge so you can handle more stress.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: They'll give you somatic tools so you can make more money and change your mind.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_01: Downshift so that you can go back into high input.
• 15:46
  SPEAKER_01: And those things can help.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_01: Obviously, they do.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_01: But if you only regulate, if you only regulate, never touch the trauma route, then you've just become more of a polished version of survival mode.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_01: That's all that is.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's like you're not, they're not healing the fear, they're just handling the symptoms succeeding.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_01: So, what happens when you do these things, when you do nervous system regulation without addressing the traumas?
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_01: Number one, you get functional, but you're not free.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_01: You're gonna be able to breathe through the trigger, you're not gonna be, you're not gonna react the same way, but the trigger still owns real estate in your body and brain.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, you're gonna increase your capacity, you're gonna start making more money, things are gonna get better, but the old pattern is still under there.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like I said, you're gonna be able to hold more money, more visibility, better relationships, and more pressure.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: Underneath your system's gonna be still thinking that it's not safe.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_01: It's like they learn to use regulation as a performance tool.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_01: That's not what I'm here for.
• 16:33
  SPEAKER_01: I'm the OG, I'm the godmother.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_01: They call me the godmother.
• 16:36
  SPEAKER_01: Instead of my body deserves to feel safe, it's let me calm down, let me come back to myself so I can produce better.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's like it's like hustle, but in a softer costume.