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What Men Need To Know About Menopause · My Sexy Menopause Body

• 0:37
  SPEAKER_00: Noise from women just like you.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, let's go.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_01: Hey there and welcome back to my sexy menopause body.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_01: I'm Kim Nicholson, and today we are talking about a topic that I believe has a power to change relationships, strengthen your connections, and create a better understanding.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: What men need to know about menopause.
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_01: Let's face it, menopause can seem like uncharted territory for many men.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't blame them.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's not something they're taught about because we're not even taught about it in school.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_01: Or if it is, it's just, you know, oh, it'll happen later on in life.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: There's no kind of outline or guideline to follow.
• 1:32
  SPEAKER_01: And often it's something that women themselves we feel unprepared for.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_01: I know I did, and many, many, many other people I know felt unprepared for this.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_01: So then you add in symptoms like mood swings, hot flashes, and of course sleep disruptions, and you've got a recipe for confusion and frustration on both sides.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: But here's the thing: support during menopause isn't just helpful, it's absolutely positively critical.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_01: Studies show that when women feel supported, they're better equipped to navigate their physical and emotional changes of this transition.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: So whether you're a man tuning in today or a woman woman looking to share this episode with somebody in your life, stick around.
• 2:27
  SPEAKER_01: We are breaking down the ways men can show up, why it matters, and how it can transform this phase or this chapter that for everyone that's involved.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_01: Alright, so let's start with the research because science backs us up.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: A recent study published in BMC Women's Health explored the experiences of women during the transition to menopause.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_01: And guess what?
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: Their findings were clear.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_01: Women who had emotional and practical support reported less psychological distress, even better management of symptoms, and overall improvement of quality of life.
• 3:12
  SPEAKER_01: Another study highlighted how menopause increases risks for conditions like cardiovascular disease, osteoporosis, and even like mental health challenges.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_01: But when women have supportive partners, family and friends, they're more likely to seek help, adopt healthy habits, and of course take those proactive steps to manage their well-being.
• 3:35
  SPEAKER_01: So this isn't just about being nice, it's about creating this foundation of care and this foundation of understanding that can make all the difference during this kind of vulnerable time.
• 3:53
  SPEAKER_01: So let me ask you a question.
• 3:55
  SPEAKER_01: If you're a man, how do you think you support or lack of it impacts a woman in your life during menopause?
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: That's a good question.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that if your man is not listening today, then you need to ask him this.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_01: How do you think I need support during this phase of my life?
• 4:17
  SPEAKER_01: Now remember, I say this almost every episode, that we spend one third or one half of our life, if we're lucky, in this phase.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_01: So, and there's so many things that we change that we all know during this phase.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_01: So ask your man, how do you think your support is?
• 4:37
  SPEAKER_01: Or in some situations, lack of it.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so there are things that we want our men to know about menopause.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_01: And number one, and this is comes from years of working with my clients, and this is their rated number one statement.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: They want men to know about menopause.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_01: Here it is.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_01: It's just about your period stopping.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: So what?
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_01: Stop complaining.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's a hormonal overhaul that affects almost every aspect of our life.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_01: Our estrogen levels fluctuate, and this can cause everything from our mood swings and our weight gain to hot flashes and brain fog.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_01: And I mean, there's a list of like 50 to 60 other symptoms that it creates.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_01: So I know, men, this can feel disorienting.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_01: You might notice, you know, us or your partner is more emotional or seems a little more distant during this time.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_01: The key here is to understand that these changes, they're not personal, they're physiological.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_01: All right, that's we what we really want you to know.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_01: They aren't personal.
• 6:01
  SPEAKER_01: But there are things that you can do.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_01: Number one, we'd like you to do is to be curious and not critical.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we want you to talk to us or ask us questions like, you know, like uh, let's see, what's been the hardest part of this for you?
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_01: You know, just open up the topic with us and we'll we'll gladly educate you on where we stand in this phase.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: And you need to recognize too that your partner may not always feel like herself, and that's okay too.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_01: Allow us to feel the way we are during this time because we can't even explain it half the time either.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_01: All right, the second topic that um we wanted to discuss today was that emotional support means everything.
• 6:50
  SPEAKER_01: What I mean by that is one of the hardest parts of menopause is the feeling of isolation.
• 6:56
  SPEAKER_01: As women, we often feel like, you know, we're doing this alone.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_01: Again, we never had there was not a book out there.
• 7:03
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, this back when I was beginning to go through perimenopause.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and even when, you know, the little bit of if there is any kind of educational topic in schools, it was minor.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_01: And so there's there wasn't a whole lot of information out there.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_01: But your role as a partner or as a friend is to help us bridge that gap, to remind us that we're not alone.
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_01: That's when we need you.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_01: So here's a tip: you don't have to have all the answers.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: All right, we're not asking you to have all the answers, and we don't want you to fix anything.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_01: But sometimes all we need is for you to just listen.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_01: So when we're, you know, venting about a tough day or a rough night, try responding with something like, um, you know, that sounds hard.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_01: How can I support you?
• 7:50
  SPEAKER_01: I love that one.
• 7:51
  SPEAKER_01: My husband says that.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_01: How can I support you?
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_01: What can I do for you?
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_01: And that one sentence can actually make all the difference in the world.
• 8:00
  SPEAKER_01: It takes us off the defensive and kind of stops us, at least it does for me.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_01: So how can I support you?
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: All right, I got a question for you.
• 8:12
  SPEAKER_01: So, when was the last time you listened without trying to fix something?
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_01: I know, man, we love you, but we know that you're always trying to fix something.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_01: So, what would happen if you offered support instead of solutions?
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_01: Hmm.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_01: That's an interesting thought, isn't it?
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_01: Try it.
• 8:36
  SPEAKER_01: I bet you'll get I'll I bet you'll get an incredible uh reaction if you do do that.
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_01: All right, number three.
• 8:44
  SPEAKER_01: We want you to know that even the smallest, tiniest gestures make a big impact.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_01: Your support doesn't have to be huge or grand gestures.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_01: In fact, it's the small, consistent actions that often mean the most.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_01: So if we're having a hot flash, offer us a glass of cold water or turn on the fan.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_01: If we're feeling overwhelmed, take something off of our plate.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_01: You know, cook dinner for the night, or full of laundry, or suggest just a relaxing evening together.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_01: That will go a long way.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_01: Because these little acts show that you're paying attention and that you do care.
• 9:34
  SPEAKER_01: And we know you do.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_01: Just sometimes doesn't come off that way.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_01: All right, the fourth thing we want to know is physical want you to know is that our physical intimacy still matters.
• 9:48
  SPEAKER_01: It's to me, it's even more important at this phase in my life than it ever was.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_01: Metopause can sometimes make us feel um disconnected from our bodies.
• 9:57
  SPEAKER_01: Changes like our weight shifts and uh common hot flashes and even vaginal dryness can lead to, you know, some insecurities or even some avoidance of intimacy.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_01: So what we would need and what we want you to know from our man during this time is reassurance.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_01: Remind us that we're we're still attractive, we are loved, and that we are desirable by you.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: Physical intimacy doesn't always have to mean sex.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_01: Things like things that like that go a long way with us are things like uh holding hands, cuddling, you know, giving us a uh spontaneous hug.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_01: This can help us feel connected and hugely supportive during this time.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, compliment us genuinely.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_01: You know, saying something like, you know, I love the way your smile just lights up the room, or it makes me happy when I see you smile, or, you know, create moments of connection, you know, even if they're small, even if they're small.
• 11:09
  SPEAKER_01: Just create those moments of connection.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_01: Buy a card or write a love note on a piece of paper, anything like that.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: Those things go a long way.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_01: So here's a couple things that we would, you know, as women, we would like men to do to show up.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_01: First of all, is you know, for men, is to educate yourself.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: You know, ignorance doesn't have to mean avoidance.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: You know, you could read a book or keep listening to this podcast or, you know, watch a video on it.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_01: There's plenty on YouTube, I'm sure.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_01: But the more you know, and the better equipped you will be to support your significant other.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: Um, another thing you can do is just to be patient during this time.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: Remember, it's menopause, it's not it's not linear, it's not a straight line.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_01: Actually, it's kind of a a winding road with some potholes in it along the way.
• 12:09
  SPEAKER_01: Some days are gonna be awesome for us, and then others will be hard, very hard.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: So your patience can make all the difference.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: So be patient.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: A third thing you can do is to build that connection through conversation with us.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_01: Again, going back to asking open-ended questions, like, you know, what's what's one thing I can do for you to make this easier, or what can I do for you to make this easier, or you know, how are you how are you feeling lately?
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: You know, these questions show that you're engaged with us and that you're invested in our well-being.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_01: Again, it it's that connection that we're looking for.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_01: So conversation goes a long way.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, you know, the fourth thing that you can do is to celebrate your woman as she is, you know, menopause is a transition, it's not a decline.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_01: This is basically during this time, it's a time of uh growth or wisdom or reinvention.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_01: And please, along the way, celebrate her strength, her resilience, and the journey you're on together.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it is a team effort, and it's an important team effort.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_01: So, again, some key takeaways from today's episode is menopause isn't just a woman's issue, it's a shared experience that affects everybody.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_01: It affects our relationships, our families, and our communities.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_01: It affects all of us, anyone who's important to us, anyone who's in our circle, it will affect them.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_01: Because, like I said, sometimes you just don't know what kind of path we're on for the day.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_01: So it does, it is, it is a shared experience.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_01: Another takeaway I'd like you to remember about today's show is that we need your support during this time.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_01: We need your emotional, we need your physical and practical um you know support.
• 14:21
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, this can improve the quality of life for us and actually strengthen your connection with your woman.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, small gestures of care and kindness can have a huge impact.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_01: Just show up, be present, and be patient.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_01: It's those little things that make a huge difference.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_01: So now for women, I have some reflective questions for you.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_01: So think about these things, write them down.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: I hope you brought your journal with you today.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_01: But what I have a question, or so your first question is what's one thing you wish your partner understood about menopause?
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_01: That's a really good question, too.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_01: Give it some thought.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_01: And it's a great way to open up the discussion.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_01: And then the next one or part two of that would be how can you share that information with them?
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_01: Whether it's your spouse or, you know, friends, you know, you want to be able to discuss your uh your phase during menopause or what you're going through.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_01: And for men, my question for you is how can you show up for your partner in a way that feels uh supportive without trying to I'm using ear quotes here, fix everything.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: And for both of you, for both of you.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: What's one thing that you can navigate this chapter together as a team?
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_01: What can you do as a team during this time?
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_01: Because again, one third of one half of your life is spent in this phase.
• 15:52
  SPEAKER_01: So that is my show for today.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_01: I appreciate you all so much.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_01: So thank you so much for tuning in to my episode of My Sexy Menopause Body.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, this episode was all about building bridges, it's not about barriers.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_01: Menopause can be very challenging for us, but it's also an opportunity for growth and for connection and a deeper understanding with our partner.
• 16:26
  SPEAKER_01: So if today's episode did resonate with you, please share it with someone who needs to hear it.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_01: We need to grow this community.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_01: And of course, if you're looking for more tips or tools or just a supportive community, head over to kimnik.com to check out my free resources.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_01: So remember, until next time, menopause isn't the end of any journey, it's a new chapter.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_01: And let's write this together.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_01: Take care.
• 17:02
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for being here with us on MySexy Menopause Body.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_00: Remember, this is your journey, your chance to own your body, mind, and spirit.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: And define sexy on your terms.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: If today's episode resonated with you, subscribe, leave a review, and share it with others.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: Let's keep building this conversation and this community together.
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_00: Until next time, take care of yourself and keep showing up.