Latest / Libido Lounge / Is This the Future of Sex? Exploring AI-Driven Pleasure Devices

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Is This the Future of Sex? Exploring AI-Driven Pleasure Devices · Libido Lounge

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Welcome to the libido lounge where we focus on all things love, lust, and libido.
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We believe that fabulous sex is important to health as exercise and good food.
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Hey, everybody.
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Welcome back to another episode on the libido lounge.
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I'm your host, doctor Diane, libido expert, and I have a juicy episode in store for you all
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today.
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I have with me Anna Lee, one of the founders of the Lioness vibrator, and let me tell you
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before we get started that this is not your usual vibrator.
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Before we get started to any of these details and all of the juicy topics of today's
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conversation, I wanna remind you that what I've seen in research and my own clinical experience
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is that vibrator use can help with things like pain, pain with sacs, numbness, pelvic floor
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dysfunction, also with helping people reach better orgasms, longer orgasms, vaginal
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dryness, connecting with their partner, and so many more things.
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So we're really seeing more and more the the use of vibrators, not just as pleasure toys,
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which, of course, they are, but also as ways that we can truly heal so many areas of sexual
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imbalance.
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So we're gonna talk today about this very, very special vibrator.
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We're gonna talk about what made Anna really come up with this unique idea.
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And so let's just first with saying hi.
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So welcome, and thank you for being part of this show today with me.
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Yeah.
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Thanks for having me.
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That's such a lovely introduction.
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Well, what your product is amazing, and I think we should set the stage before we get into the
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nitty gritty of, like, kind of the the, you know, the fun behind the product is let's talk
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a little bit about what makes this, you know, unique compared to other products out there.
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I'll share with the audience my experience.
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I'd love to hear about your experience with this product.
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But you could tell us about, like, why this is not a normal standard vibrator and what makes
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it different.
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Yeah.
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I would say, like, it does look like a normal kinda quote, unquote typical vibrator.
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It's a rapid style vibrator, but it's the first and only smart vibrator that gives you
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biofeedback data about your own pleasure and your own orgasms.
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So we always like to say it's almost like a Fitbit or an Oura Ring, but for your sexual
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pleasure to help you understand what's working, what's not, what's making it better, what are
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things that are changing that you might not be aware of until you start tracking and
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understanding that self, body part of your body and getting that orgasm data about your own
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body.
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And that's exactly, you know, what I have found in my own use with this around like, I've been
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a fan of vibrators for a long time, decades now.
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And what I have found in the short time I've been using your vibrator for no.
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I guess it's been about, like, three or four weeks now.
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And one of the things that I have found so quickly with this is it's very interesting in
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comparing it to, like, a Fitbit where it's like, oh, you get data.
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Right?
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And it's like, okay.
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Well, maybe you get 8,000 steps.
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And it's like, oh, there's that motivation to go walk because you're there's, like, this
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almost like this dopamine exchange with the body where when we get that feedback, it
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creates this motivation cycle where it's actually I've seen one of the the things I saw
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very, very quickly was even though I do have a pleasure practice already in my life, it's
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actually increased the amount of time I am spending in pleasure with myself and with my
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partner.
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And I and and I think what's happening is just, like, seeing that data and getting that
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feedback, I'm like, oh.
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I'm like, it makes me more curious to go deeper and learn more.
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So I'm actually finding, like, one of the things I have found so quickly is that it's
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actually making me more committed to my my practice of self care and pleasure.
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That's incredible.
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Yeah.
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I would say exactly the same thing.
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I, I was I tell people all the time before we start the company, I was so scared of my own
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body, and I was very much like like, maybe I would master it, but never think twice about,
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like, well, what made it a good experience?
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What did I like?
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What did I don't didn't like?
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And so for me, Linus as well, like, getting that data was, like, a big part of me getting
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to slowly understand my body from a physiological standpoint so that I could
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embrace my sexuality, sensuality, and feeling more comfortable with my own body.
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So I think you hit the nail on the head.
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It it really is a thing of taking the time to actually understand what your pleasure means to
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you versus just being like, okay.
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I'm done.
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Like, I'm moving on to doing other things, but actually giving ourselves to say, like,
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knowledge is pleasure.
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I'm curious, and too, in, like, people that you work with that have used as product and
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partnership, and I know, you know, you talk about this in some of the literature that comes
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with your product around your partner play.
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Right?
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Because I think one of the things that happens so oftentimes with partners is we get stuck in
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our sexual scripts, and it can sometimes be hard and challenging for partners to get out of
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that.
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And sometimes the use of a vibrator in partner play can even be intimidating for people in the
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beginning.
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But, like, what I'm, what I'm seeing with this is a lot of potential around, oh, it becomes,
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like, more around like like like an easier thing to bring a partner in on because there's
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that direct feedback with, oh, like, oh, this pleasure spot is really working to arouse this
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you know, my partner.
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And then we're getting more of that direct feedback, so I think it can bring people into
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being more creative together and playing together in a different way.
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So I'm just I'm curious to see, like, to hear what you've seen in talking to people that have
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used this for partner play.
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Yeah.
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I I always I always say, like, you know, I think a lot of people see vibrators as, like, a
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very solo masturbation thing.
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But I think one of the coolest things as we were originally doing the research and
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development and building out prototypes, giving out the beta testers, it was that they were
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showing their data to their significant other being like, hey.
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Like, just look at my like, what this looks like.
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And one of the most the biggest moments I remember having is a person who didn't know how
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to bring up that she wanted more foreplay.
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And this was a kind of a really fun way to just being like, hey.
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Let's just play with this toy and see what it looks like, what the data looks like, because
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it becomes a fun, curious thing versus an accusatory, like, you're not doing this or x,
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y, and z.
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And so one of the things she said was, like, a big moment was that she was like, look.
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With just this vibrator, it took me thirty minutes to get to an orgasm.
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So just understanding that it foreplay was so important and how long she needed just with the
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toy itself.
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And so she said that she saw her partner, the light bulb go off in his head, and seeing that
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data, seeing that the session was, like, thirty minutes being like, oh, like, we just needed to
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do longer foreplay.
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We need to do bigger buildups because she can get to an orgasm.
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It just takes her a little bit more time.
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And so she said it was, like, a really fun way for her to kind of break that barrier.
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You bring a toy.
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It's like a fun thing.
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And it kinda takes that stigma and, like, that little bit of that taboo away for people.
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And so I think it was a great way to introduce, one, toys to the bedroom within a partnered
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relationship to kind of seeing data in, like, a new fun aspect of it, and then just kind of
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learning different aspects about about another person's body that maybe you haven't known
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before.
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Yeah.
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I love all of that, and I wanna go back then since we are talking about the development of
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the research of all that.
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What actually inspired this whole product to take off?
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Like, where did this vision come from?
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Because like you said, it's like the only one on the market.
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It's such a unique a unique device that way.
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Yeah.
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Yeah.
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So I my background's in mechanical engineering.
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I was previously at Amazon building, like, Kindle devices and things like that.
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And I think one of the big things I have to always tell people, like, we started the
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company about nine years ago.
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And nine years ago, I was a very different person.
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I was super scared of my body.
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I was very much like, I will never do interviews.
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But I knew from an engineering perspective, I did wanna build a better vibrator because I
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feel like vibrators haven't really changed in terms of how they're engineered, what kind of
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things there are beyond, like, a buzzing thing or anything like that.
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And so, and I I had started to learn that the sex toy industry was extremely male dominated,
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and I met this founder of a different sex toy company that doesn't exist anymore, and I was
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this guy.
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And I was like, how do you know why you're building, like, worse for women and, like,
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people with vulvas?
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And he was like, oh, you just put it on your nose, the vibration.
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That's what a clitoris feels like.
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And you'll see it, you know, still if you go to sex toy conventions to this day.
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It's such a common thing that they'll show, which I think I understand what they're getting
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at.
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Like, I understand that, like, the nose has maybe a little bit more nerves, so it's closer
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to the clitoris.
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But I was really surprised that the first answer wasn't, oh, we give it out to as many
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women as possible.
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We get as much feedback.
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We get that input.
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We have women on the team.
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And so we knew we wanted to build a smarter vibrator.
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And at first, we actually were trying to build, like, an AI vibrator that moves, and the more
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it learns about you, it'll vibrate differently and all of that.
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But as we looked into the data, we realized in research, there's so little research around
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female sexual pleasure.
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And there wasn't really data to go on like, well, what does an orgasm look for look like
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for a woman?
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Like and we found one paper from the nineteen eighties, by Bolin, and he showed that it's you
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can see orgasms through, involuntary pelvic floor contractions.
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So whether it's anal or vaginal, you can see your pelvic floor muscles squeeze and relax
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from a really rhythmic pattern.
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And so we took that, and we just started building and developing this thing of, well,
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can you see does it look different if you've had a cup of coffee that day, or you're really
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stressed, or you're doing it in the morning versus the nighttime?
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And we saw that your orgasm patterns is just it's like an identity to you.
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It might look similar, but it changes from different factors.
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And so that's when we really kinda leaned into this thing of realizing how important data can
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be for people to understand about their own body and something that they've never seen
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about themselves.
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And that's how blindness all kinda came together.
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And now we're here nine years later, still sex experimenting, sex still sexploring, and still
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learning more and more things every day.
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And you, I mean, you bring up so many good points in that, right?
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It's like no wonder there's not research that is really profound in this space, and no wonder
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why scientists and, you know, medical professors and schools have such a hard time
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teaching about female orgasms and why pharmaceutical companies have had such a hard
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time developing hypoactive essential drugs for women is in part because of all of that,
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because of, like, exactly what you found in in some of the studies so far that you guys have
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been doing around, oh, yeah.
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Maybe caffeine does this for one woman and that for another woman, and it's so incredibly
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unique.
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And so from what I hear with what you're saying, it's like, in some ways, maybe less
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than saying and and determining, like, oh, somebody should avoid caffeine or another woman
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should avoid this or that and more just, like, getting that data and feedback right around,
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like, where the uniqueness of you as a woman, how do how does your erotic tissue actually
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respond?
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Totally.
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Yeah.
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And I I always tell people, like, I'm not saying that every single time you have sex or
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masturbate, you don't have to always be so analytical about it.
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Like, I'm not saying, like, I I'll masturbate every day and then write a journal entry of all
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the things that have happened, but it's nice to take those moments and kind of take it away
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from sometimes, like, the sexiness away from sex and just being like, oh, like, being in
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touch with your body, reflecting back on what's been working for you.
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And even me, like, I'm still learning things about my own body to this day.
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Actually, just most recently, I was looking at my data from 2017 versus this year, and I
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realized the time it takes me to have an orgasm has increased, but the amount of big squeezes,
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big relaxes, and the length of the orgasms has also doubled in length.
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And that's something that I, like, didn't really think about until recently, just looking
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at the two separate data being like, oh, I think this is me really taking the time to
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enjoy my masturbation practice more versus previously, it was kind of like a mechanical,
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like, getting it done, quote, unquote, kind of feeling.
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And so I'm still constantly learning about, the different changes in my body and just kind of
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taking the time from being like, oh, that's something new that I hadn't thought about
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myself.
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Yeah.
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I just I love that so, so, so much.
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And and I do think there's a level too where it's like with taking, like, not being
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scientific all the time.
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Right?
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Just enjoying it and and enjoying the pleasure, but then also coming back to the data sometimes
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from a standpoint of exploring one's body or talking to a partner can really take away some
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of that, that that intensity and stigma and, like, you know, fear that sometimes, like, we
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that we experience as humans around the subject of sexuality, right, when it's just like, oh,
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let's, like, look at the data points, and let's just see what feels good and see what how my
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body responds to.
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It just it makes things so clear, and it kinda takes away maybe something like emotional
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charge that people might have about it.
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Do you find that?
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Totally.
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I mean, even for myself, I think one of the big things I know is, for me, stress.
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So having very high cortisol level really drops my pleasure to the point where I sometimes,
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like, don't feel the orgasm or it's like a really small blip.
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And I've started seeing it in my data of, like, the months that I'm extremely stressed.
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And it was actually a moment to actually be able to take it back to my partners at the time
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and being like, hey.
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Like, this is something that I know about myself is that I just don't feel any level of
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arousal when there's too many things going on in my life and I'm overstressed.
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And even if I'm enjoying the experience, the orgasm just doesn't come for me.
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And I think that was such an important thing that I was able to actually have that
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conversation and, like, in a fun way, like, show the graphs of being, like, literally, I
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can't find the orgasm in this chart.
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Like, and even if it is, it's like really, really tiny blip in it.
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And so I think those are the moments, like, even personally for me of realizing those
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moments of, taking the time to being like yeah.
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Breaking the barriers down.
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And I think just knowing those things about yourself and knowing that there's nothing
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wrong.
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I think the biggest question we get all the time is, am I normal?
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Is this normal?
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Is it normal that this is happening?
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And it's it's finding the moments to being like, your body is absolutely normal.
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It's just how your body responds.
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Yeah.
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Absolutely.
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And then I'm also curious around just, like, patterns.
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Have you seen any types of orgasm patterns in the data you've been collecting at all?
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Yes.
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That's a
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great question.
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It's, it's one of the things that we're the most, most, most proud of, because now we have
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the world's largest dataset on female sexual function, the biggest thing and has been for
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our mission of our company is to expand the research around female sexual function.
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And one of the papers that was published about two years ago, led by doctor Jim Faust of
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Prague University, he actually saw through the line of, data that was, basically contributed
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by re by users that wanted to be a part of the research study that we found three unique
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patterns that can happen during an orgasm.
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So almost everyone is, like, categorized of one of three types.
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The ocean wave, which is the most common.
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It's also my pattern.
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It's this very rhythmic squeeze and relax that happens during the orgasm.
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So you'll see it kind of look like an ocean wave.
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There's the avalanche, similar to the ocean wave where you're seeing the squeeze and relax,
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but it starts much higher in force, and then it trickles down.
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So it gets weaker and weaker as the orgasm con continues.
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And then your classic movie esque, how people represented in movies is what we call the
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volcano type.
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There's a huge explosion of force and a huge drop in force, less of a rhythmic contraction.
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And now something really cool that, doctor Jim Faust got to got to present on because I think
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it it explains a lot of people when someone else describes what an orgasm feels like for
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them.
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If you're like, wait.
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That doesn't that's not what might feel like.
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Maybe I'm not doing it correctly, but it's may maybe just that we have different patterns.
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And it's been really cool to see people starting to identify with different patterns
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and seeing what their patterns look like and seeing how it could be different than your
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friends or your partners and all of that.
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Oh, it's so beautiful.
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And do you I do you have any data?
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I'm just curious.
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Are there, like, percentages on, like, oh, most women have a tendency more to this, or is it
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just so unique around?
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It's just hard to even identify percentages.
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Yeah.
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Originally, I would say, like, originally, when that paper was published, we did mention that
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we haven't really seen people jump from pattern to pattern.
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So, for example, I'm an ocean wave.
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I'm kind of forever an ocean wave.
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But, actually, over the past two years, what we started seeing is people can potentially jump
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from one pattern to another.
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So now it's become harder to split in terms of, like, what percentage everyone is.
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But I would say, like, I wanna say almost close to 80% people are gonna be the ocean wave
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pattern for the most part.
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But even for me, I've recently found some of my data looking like the avalanche type.
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And so, yeah, it's been kinda school to see, like, how people might change, and we don't
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know what causes one pattern versus the other pattern.
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But typically, we've seen people be one specific pattern only, and most commonly has
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been the ocean wave pattern.
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Yeah.
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That's so cool.
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And then there's just so much ability once we know that pattern to have, you know, just like
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fun ability to say, okay, well, let's see if I can become an avalanche, and how do we do that?
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Yes.
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What if we do this?
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Right?
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Like, you become your great your own sex experimenter.
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It's incredible.
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Totally.
17:20
Totally.
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And then, Nina, just think about, like, my mind just goes through, like, all the different ways
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this can be brought into, like, foreplay because then it it's like I'm always looking
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for things, especially in partnerships, around, like, helping people solve problems by being
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back on the same team together because I think sometimes in long term partnerships when things
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just get a little out of balance, we just we forget that we're on the same team.
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Mhmm.
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And I
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think this is just such a good opportunity to be like, oh, okay.
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Well, now we you know?
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Okay.
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We know I'm an ocean type.
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So how do we you know, if we try this, like, will that change my orientation?
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That.
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Yeah.
17:53
Yeah.
17:53
It's just it's just there's so much so much foreplay and fun conversation potential at hand
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here.
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Absolutely.
18:00
Yeah.
18:00
I think that's
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what makes it just super
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fun.
18:02
Yeah.
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It really does.
18:04
It really does.
18:05
Well, I know we have a coupon code for everybody today.
18:08
So libido lounge, everybody, if you use libido lounge, and we'll have links to Lioness.
18:14
But if you use libido lounge as a code, you will get 10% off.
18:18
So I wanna make sure everybody knows about that.
18:20
We'll have all of the links you gave us on how to get ahold of you and follow your work here
18:25
in the bio in the bio and show notes today as well.
18:29
But before we let you go, is there anything that you feel like, we did not cover that we
18:35
absolutely have to say today?
18:36
Oh, that's a good question.
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I mean, I think it really is.
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Like, I hope people continue experimenting with their own body.
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Like, I I think sometimes when you think that you, like, really know your body, it's really
18:48
cool to start really getting curious of, like, even little things like, oh, if I'm a nighttime
18:52
person, what happens if I start masturbating or having sex in the daytime and then seeing what
18:57
those different changes could be?
18:58
And the possibilities are endless of what you can possibly, like, experimenting with.
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We've definitely seen people that do edging, have anything with, like, maybe THC lubricants,
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things like that, or, has been teach and caffeine has all been really interesting ones
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that we've seen really unique data around.
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And so I always tell people, like, where do you start?
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I'm always like, caffeine's a really easy kind of fun one to try.
19:22
And edging, I would a % recommend practicing edging, seeing how that could totally change
19:28
your pleasure.
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But, yeah, I would just say, like, continue being curious about your own body.
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Amazing.
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Well, thank you so much for all of this information, for founding this really, really
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cool company.
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I'm so excited for continued study and data collection on my own body and sharing the
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message to the lightest.
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Yeah.
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So thank you so much, Anna.
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It's really a pleasure.
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So much for having me.
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This is so this is so lovely.
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I'm excited.
19:51
Same here.
19:52
Same here.
19:52
And thanks again, everybody, for tuning in for another episode here.
19:56
Just as a reminder, remember that vote and share this podcast and download it.
20:03
And remember that whoever has the most downloads and shares, we are reaching out at
20:08
the end of the year for 2024.
20:09
Whoever has the most downloads and shares, we will invite them back for a longer deep dive.
20:14
And I know by the end of the year, I'm gonna have tons of my own data and tons more data for
20:19
my clients, so be super fun to have Anna back.
20:22
So make sure you do download this episode, share it with your friends.
20:26
And I'm gonna say goodbye now.
20:27
I'm just reminding you guys to always stay classy, always stay sexy, and always be a
20:33
little badass y.
20:34
See you next time.
20:39
Thank you for listening to the libido lounge.
20:41
Please don't keep me a secret.
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Please share this with your friends.
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You can find me on YouTube, on Instagram, as well as how to work with me at mylibidodoc.com.