Latest / She Rises with Ashy & Tijana / 231. Trolls, haters & online catfights

Transcript

231. Trolls, haters & online catfights · She Rises with Ashy & Tijana

• 0:05
  Speaker 1: Apogee Production. Welcome to the She Rises Podcast. I'm Ashy
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: and I'm Tiana.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: This podcast is about female empowerment and encouraging you to
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: be your biggest, boldest, and most authentic version of yourself.
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: We help you shed the shame, grow to a new level.
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: We're gonna laugh, cry, and talk about the topics everyone
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: else is too afraid to talk about.
• 0:28
  Speaker 2: Get ready for your next level of self.
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: Hello everybody, Welcome back to she Rises. Hope you guys
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: are well today. We have a kind of funny episode,
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: but I also think there's quite a few interesting topics
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: that we can talk about and also bring light to
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: and share our perspective. But before we get into it
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: or what's your share of the week.
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: My share of the week is actually a product that
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: I've been using. I'm obsessed with this new lip line
• 0:52
  Speaker 2: that I've been using good. I actually bought it by accident.
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: I meant to buy a different color, but I bought
• 0:56
  Speaker 2: this one instead, and it turns out I love it.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: It's by Morphy the brand, and the color is whipped.
• 1:01
  Speaker 2: It's almost like a bit of more of a ready tone,
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: a bit darker, bit deeper, And I don't know why
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: I'm just obsessed with it.
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 1:07
  Speaker 2: When I don't worry it, I feel a little bit pale,
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: and I.
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: Don't really like ready tones. But I noticed when you
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: all this, I said, oh, is that one of the
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: other ones we've bought, and you're like, no, it's a
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: new one. It looks really nice on you. Thank you. Yeah,
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: I love it.
• 1:18
  Speaker 2: I would highly recommend. And it's only like twelve dollars.
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: Morphy's so cheap. I've got to send a pr pack
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: there that I should have brought it to show. But
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: their makeup is incredible. We went to an event recently. Ye. Wow,
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: the blushes, the bronzes, the consistency of the makeup. It's
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: really beautiful.
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: They have good eyeshadows, I believe.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I loved everything of theirs. So cool, so good.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: I share the week a little bit controversial. It actually
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: ended up in the media because we ended up in
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: the media. We spoke of my snapchat and stories about
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: just adding a few little extra things to the shopping cart.
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: Now we're not buying the whole shopping center. So everyone
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: calmed down. But we're deep in the rabbit hole of
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: what potentially this next couple of weeks A couple of
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: months and a couple of years is going to be
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: and who knows what's going to happen. I think any
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: of us ever know. And that's why I'm not sitting
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: on my high hole saying this is going to happen
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: and to and scare anyone. But I think the way
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: you were to me, which was like, oh my gosh,
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: this is so right, it's like, why not be a
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: little bit prepared if something was to happen, if we
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: would go into another lockdown, or if things were to
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: be restricted, or the fuel runs out and the transport
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: can't get food to us. I want to hope that
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: I'm a little bit prepared. So every week I've just
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: been adding in my shopping cart a couple of extra
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: tins of tuna, a couple of extra packets of rice cakes.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: I've got some sped toilet paper a home. I've made
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: sure I've got enough water, like I've just got things
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: prepped and ready, just extra supplies, YEA, extra supplies. So
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: I don't think it's selfish. I don't think it's bad.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: I don't think it's being over dramatic Personally. I think
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: when you've got children, and even if you don't have children.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: You just want to be a little bit prepped. So
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: that is my recommendation. As you're shopping this week, just
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: chuck a couple extra tins in and do that every
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: week so if something was to happen, you're prepped and
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: you're not left their strand and being oh my gosh,
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: because I don't know if what to happen in Australia,
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: but what I've seen is like even a blackout that
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: might be happening, imagine a full power and off and
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: you've got no food, no supplies, no phone, you can't
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: use your key card, no Wi Fi yep. Then what
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: just prep Yeah, all right, let's get into it. So
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: today's topic is chrolls, haters and online cat fights. What
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: the Internet has said about us this week. It's so
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: funny because I think we are such open books and
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: we want to always have the conversations that everyone else
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: is too scared to have. Because you're having it in
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: your private grip chat, you're having it with your partner.
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  Speaker 1: Everyone's curious. It's like, let's bring it in here, normalize it,
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: dissolve the shame and just like chat about the hardship.
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  Speaker 1: So that's what we do online, and let's start off
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  Speaker 1: with your sober post. What do they have to say
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  Speaker 1: on there?
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  Speaker 2: There were a lot of really supportive comments on that,
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: but there were a couple of people who wanted to
• 3:41
  Speaker 2: create an argument or have a little bit of a
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: fight in a comment section in context.
• 3:45
  Speaker 1: What was it about?
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  Speaker 2: Basically, it just said calling on all of my sober people,
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  Speaker 2: where all of my sober humans at? And I love
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: this conversation because I've been sober for over three years
• 3:54
  Speaker 2: now and then stop drinking to get drunk around twenty twenty,
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: so it's been good six years since I stopped kind
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: of being a part of that world. And I just
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: spoke about how much better my life has gotten since
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: making that decision for myself. And I really loved the
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: conversation because there were a lot of people wanting to
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: kind of jump on the bandwagon and say, oh my gosh,
• 4:10
  Speaker 2: I've haven't.
• 4:10
  Speaker 1: Drank in five years.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: It's been ten years for me, it's been my whole life.
• 4:13
  Speaker 2: Like people sharing their stories, bar one or two other
• 4:17
  Speaker 2: people who wanted to, you know, have a perspective, and.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: Drew I was maybe my stepdad and I like that
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  Speaker 1: name have.
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  Speaker 2: Something to say about what I was stating, you know,
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: something as little as like, I'm so much better than
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: everybody else because I don't drink, and I'm like, that's
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: not what I'm saying. You can judge and project and
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: interpret how what I'm saying all that you want, but
• 4:37
  Speaker 2: at the end of the day, like, that's not what
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: I was saying. All I was stating was that my
• 4:42
  Speaker 2: experience has been better since doing this, and I want
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: to connect with other like minded people who are also
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: on the same journey as me, Whereas this guy was
• 4:49
  Speaker 2: kind of stating that I was positioning myself as better
• 4:51
  Speaker 2: than everybody else, saying that I'm above everyone, and then
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: I'm judging everybody who drinks, which is not true. Not
• 4:57
  Speaker 2: once in that statement or that post did I say,
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: oh my gosh, if you drink, get away from me,
• 5:01
  Speaker 2: or if you drink, I don't like your like you know,
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: I just made a face, you know, like, you know,
• 5:08
  Speaker 2: turn my nose down to these people, because it's not true.
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: I don't care what anybody else does to be honest,
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: to give literally, don't give a fucking shit about what
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: anybody chooses for themselves. Just don't tell me what to do.
• 5:19
  Speaker 2: Yes, you know, I want to focus on my life
• 5:21
  Speaker 2: and what's important to me, And if you live your
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: life differently to me, that's totally fine. You get to
• 5:26
  Speaker 2: have that. You have freedom of choice, so do I.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: But then don't come in my comment section trying to
• 5:30
  Speaker 2: fight with me about what you think that Like I'm
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: trying to say, I hate when people put words in
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: my mouth.
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: It's annoying. And we've had this conversation before. We actually
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: do a whole episode on why we don't drink, so
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: if you're curious, I'd recommend going back and listen to that.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: But just because we don't drink, it doesn't mean we
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: automatically like put ourselves in a box. And like if
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: you drink, you can't be our friend. Like we both
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: have really close girlfriends and people in our lives that
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: still drink, but most of them have a healthier relationship
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: with it. Yeah, like I was saying, my old coach
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: Taylor like he is, I would consider him a non
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: drinking but once here for his birthday, he might enjoy
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: a gin. My girl from the Dean, she likes to
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: have a champagne every now and again to celebrate something
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: like that. Am I still friends with her? Absolutely. If
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: she pulls out in front of me, do I care, No,
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: not at all. She's not out of control, she's well
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: and balanced, she is still herself. She I don't know.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: It doesn't impact me. I don't judge people for drinking,
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: but it's just something that we have experienced has had
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: a negative impact on our lives and the people around us.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: We have decided not to do it. Plus, it doesn't
• 6:25
  Speaker 1: align with everything that we value, yes, which is sleep,
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: which is energy, which is true deep connection, not masked
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: by a beverage. It's our energy, everything that we value.
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: Our cold just kind of doesn't fit in with that anymore.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: And we also have a history of things happening in
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: our lives that have really created a lot of wounds. Absolutely,
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: and it's not fun what we've experienced. Ourcohol not at
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: a personal choice for us. And that still blows my
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: mind that alcohol is the only drug that's really celebrated
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: and pressured to have. It's like, you don't hear people
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: pressure and people to have cocaine. But if you're not
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: a drinker, come on, don't be pussy, have one or
• 6:58
  Speaker 1: have a beer, have a drink? Why why is it
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: celebrated and pressured and you're like the outsider if you're
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: not having it. Yeah, it's different with other drugs. It's
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: still a drug that alters your state and impacts your health.
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: Or even if you want to leave early, like oh
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: why are you're leaving? Stay? Stay because I need sleep?
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: You know, there is there's a lot of pressuring, you know,
• 7:16
  Speaker 2: and around needing to have a rubber arm, or like
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: we're needing to fit in society because everybody else is
• 7:21
  Speaker 2: doing it. But what I've come to realize is that
• 7:23
  Speaker 2: there are a lot of people who are actually.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Going down this health route.
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: And someone actually commented on this post Australia really had
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: a bad relationship with their drinking culture, but now he's
• 7:33
  Speaker 2: like this man said like, I'd love to see it
• 7:35
  Speaker 2: turning around, and I totally agree.
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: I think it's so beautiful.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: And again it's not to say that if you do
• 7:40
  Speaker 2: it or you choose it, like, there's nothing wrong with that.
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: If that's how you choose to live your life, totally fine.
• 7:45
  Speaker 2: But am I going to sit and have a drink
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: at dinner?
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: No I'm not. And we've even done that.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: We've had dinners with girlfriends of ours and we've been like,
• 7:51
  Speaker 2: by the way, we're not drinking, but by all means
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: if you want to whine, like go for your life,
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: like live your life.
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: It's such an interesting topic, but it's very triggering, and
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: you can see the people that get triggered. They're almost
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: trying to like justify by their drink and we're like,
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: you do you And I'm speaking to you like this
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: is just you sharing your experience and trying to connect
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: with other people who are on the same journey.
• 8:08
  Speaker 2: Is absolutely Oh there was another woman. So there was
• 8:11
  Speaker 2: one guy who said, oh, well, you better stop driving
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: them because those fumes are toxic. And I'm like, Okay,
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: Ben sixty four underscore, Kat, that's not the conversation that
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: I'm having.
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: Different.
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: If we want to look at all the things that
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: are toxic in our lives, it's probably going to be
• 8:26
  Speaker 2: ninety percent of things. I get that, But I'm speaking
• 8:28
  Speaker 2: directly to alcohol and something that we are directly consuming
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: into our bodies, cons choosing consciously choosing that we can
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: have a bad relationship with and potentially used as a clutch.
• 8:37
  Speaker 2: You're not driving because you need it for a clutch.
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: You're driving because you want to get from me to
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: be Yeah, it's very different. It's a different conversation. So
• 8:44
  Speaker 2: I get it, but I'm like, I'm not going to
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: stop driving, but I will be mindful of the things
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: that I put in my body because I don't want
• 8:49
  Speaker 2: my liver and my kidneys to fail or to impact
• 8:52
  Speaker 2: my health. Over two hundred thousand people a year die
• 8:54
  Speaker 2: from alcohol.
• 8:55
  Speaker 1: Wow, that's huge number.
• 8:56
  Speaker 2: It's huge, right, So I'm like, I get your comment
• 8:59
  Speaker 2: about the fumes, but I'm like, that's not what I'm
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: talking about.
• 9:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm talking about it. You will hear what they
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: want to hear and see what they want to say.
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: That's right. I actually read a study the other day
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: and it was saying that from millennials to Gen Z,
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: alcohol has dropped like twenty three percent. Wow, what's increased
• 9:13
  Speaker 1: is vaping. And I'm one almost like swapped. They're not
• 9:16
  Speaker 1: drinking as much, but they're vaping. Have a different clutch.
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: It's a different clutch. Yeah, super interesting. That was one
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: of the things this week. That's tough.
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's tough too, because vaping is like so bad
• 9:25
  Speaker 2: for you, but it's also the same. It's just something
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: that impacts your health and people don't realize until they're
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: the person who is struggling from it.
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: Okay, what else did we get? We got a few others.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: I get this quite often and it's a little bit frustrating,
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: and it can happen with both kids. But it's like
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: people assume that I have a favorite child depending on
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: who's on my social media the most. So when I
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: took Targe to Europe, it was like, oh, she took
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: the easy kid, like she took me. Yeah, what do
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: you mean he's a favorite? She never wanted a girl.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: She always said she wanted two boys. Of course she
• 9:53
  Speaker 1: chose to take Tarj Da da dah. But then now
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Tyala's are my social media it's and I was like,
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: oh my gosh, she's the favorite child. We never see
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Tarj and more he's been pushed to the side. I'm like,
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: he's at school school, she's with me all the time. Yeah.
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: And at that age that Tyler was, she was so
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: much younger when I took Targe to Europe, and I
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: wanted to enjoy that time with him, and he was
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: old enough to actually enjoy and go on the rides
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: and do all the things that he wanted to do.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: It's just like crazy how people project that I'm like,
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: I did have a favorite child. I have a different
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: bond with both of them. They're different, but both are beautiful.
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: I feel equally is connected to both. But it's just
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: interesting to read people's perspectives and what they assume is
• 10:29
  Speaker 1: happening behind closed doors based on what they see for
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: thirty seconds of my day.
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: But also, who said that you're not allowed to have
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: individual relationships with both of your children at any given time?
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: Exactly?
• 10:38
  Speaker 2: That's such a huge judgment called to make.
• 10:41
  Speaker 1: It is my mom said. I asked my mum if
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: she's ever felt like she's had a favorite. I'm the favorite.
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: I'm sure, she said no, But different ages and different phases.
• 10:50
  Speaker 1: I felt closer to different kids at different times. So
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: I thought that was really interesting. And also I wanted
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: to share that because in case you are listening and
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: you are a parent, and you do feel more connected
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: to twenty your kids right now, it doesn't make you
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: a bad mum. No, maybe it's just the phase and
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: the death that you guys are in conversations with. That's okay.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: Also doesn't mean you love them any less.
• 11:08
  Speaker 2: And also I feel like it depends what's also coming
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: up for you personally as well. Like, what I've learned
• 11:12
  Speaker 2: from living with my nieces and nephews is that there
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: are some phases where like my nephew will trigger me
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: more and then we come good, and then like my
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: niece triggers me or something, and then I work through
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: that problem and then I feel good with them again.
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: So I imagine that that plays a huge role with
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: it as well. But it's an interchanging relationship all the time.
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: And at the end of the day, people can have
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: an assumption all they want, but they don't know the truth.
• 11:32
  Speaker 2: They don't see and live behind the walls of your
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: house and know exactly what's going on. And I think
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: it's an unfair judgment to make on somebody else's life
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: and parenting when you just like don't see anything.
• 11:41
  Speaker 1: I get it with friends too, Like I heard it
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: the other day with you and Meg. Yeah, I tagged
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: Megan something and they're like, oh, now her favorite friend's
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: gone away, she goes back to someone else. I'm like, bitch,
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: Like I see all my friends. Yes, you guys see
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: more of Tiana because we do hang out, we work together,
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: we train together, we live three minutes down the road
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: with each other. Like, yes, you see more of you
• 12:05
  Speaker 1: post every single time with the girlfriends, some of them
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: aren't even on social media much. But the assumption was
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: that you're my favorite, and when you're not here, and
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: then I go to my other friends and I'm like,
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: oh my goodness. You know it's crazy too. We walk
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: with Meg all the time. Literally, we just don't post
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: about it. I hang out with make Solo. You hang
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: out with make Solo. I was just like, Wow, that's
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: so interesting, just the assumptions that people make.
• 12:26
  Speaker 2: And also as well, because we do work together, we're
• 12:28
  Speaker 2: filming a lot more, whereas like when we're not necessarily
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: working sometimes we're like, oh, I just don't feel like
• 12:32
  Speaker 2: filming today. Literally, I feel like being on come. I
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: just want to be present in this moment.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, like you were with Beth the other day. Yeah,
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: it's just makes me the other day. Yeah. It's just
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: funny what people say by still what they see on
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: social media, you actually have no idea. And you see,
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: even though I post a lot on social media, you
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: still only see a couple of minutes out of my
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: whole twenty four our day. Yeah, literally, and it's me
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: normally sharing something. It's not even like showing you what
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: I'm doing. Yeah, it's so interesting. You know.
• 12:55
  Speaker 2: It gets me is like when people want to see
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: more than what you've shared. I'm like, you already share
• 12:59
  Speaker 2: so much, and there are things that you don't share
• 13:02
  Speaker 2: for a reason because I.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: Feel entire That upsets me sometimes, although I'll ask questions
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, you know, where's Targe go to school?
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: Or why didn't you talk about this friendship? And I'm like, obviously,
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: I try and say it really kindly, but I'm like, look,
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: I share so much of my life. If I'm not
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: sharing something, it's for a reason. Yeah, I'm not going
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: to share where Tage goes to school to protect him,
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: or if I'm not talking about a certain friendship breakdown,
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: it's because I don't want to cause drama online. I
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: don't want anything to impact her mental health. And I
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: don't think this is the place to share what's happened
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: behind the scenes. This is between me and that person.
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: This isn't a gossip or a tea page. Like, I'll
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: share what I'm comfortable sharing, and if I'm not talking
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: about something, just know this for a reason. There's a reason,
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: you know, Yeah, Okay, can we talk about the qualification
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: one because this guy I thought it was so funny
• 13:45
  Speaker 1: his response to you, you did a video about not caring
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: about people's qualifications. Can you elaborate and your context of
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: what that reel was about?
• 13:51
  Speaker 2: So I made a post. It's very I must have
• 13:55
  Speaker 2: been mid period that week.
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: No, I love it. Even our business coach was like, fuck, yeah,
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: this is the Tiana you want to see. It was
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: you and your strong opinion. It was so passionate.
• 14:02
  Speaker 2: I had watched a video online about somebody talking about
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: qualifications and I just had a very strong opinion on it.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: And this video was all about me being like, I
• 14:09
  Speaker 2: actually don't give a shit about your qualifications. If I'm
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: getting you to lead me in an area of my
• 14:14
  Speaker 2: life to help improve my life, I'm not looking at
• 14:17
  Speaker 2: the fact that you've read a textbook for the last
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: three years.
• 14:19
  Speaker 1: What I want to know.
• 14:20
  Speaker 2: I want to know that you've been through hardship, You've
• 14:23
  Speaker 2: been in the trenches, you've hit rock bottom of your
• 14:26
  Speaker 2: own and you walked yourself through the fire and up
• 14:28
  Speaker 2: and out.
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: That's what I want to.
• 14:30
  Speaker 2: Know, because I just have this ultimate level of respect
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: for people who have been through hard things, who are
• 14:35
  Speaker 2: resilient as fuck and who also know what it's like
• 14:38
  Speaker 2: to take themselves through the fire and on the other side,
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: like what I mentioned, and you know, obviously that comes
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: with a lot of people having an opinion on people
• 14:46
  Speaker 2: being qualified. I actually can't remember what this guy said.
• 14:49
  Speaker 1: Do you? Yeah? I can. And also just to quickly
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: add on to that, we're not discrediting qualification, not at
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: all all. Respect for all qualifications and the study in
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: time that people put into go into UNI. For sure,
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: that was just your own opinion on it. Also not
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: every case, it's important to you. So this Andrew guy
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: came on to the same as Andrew came on to
• 15:08
  Speaker 1: Channa's post and was like, Oh, this is so stupid.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: So you're telling me that when you break your leg,
• 15:12
  Speaker 1: you're going to visit someone that's broken their leg and
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: get them to help you. I was like, did you
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: actually just type that? I actually comment to back, which
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: I don't normally jump into this, but I was like,
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: how have you twisted that? Like, of course, if you
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: break your leg, you're going to go to a doctor. Well,
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: we're talking about a different style of coaching for a
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: different scenario. Like that's not what you were saying no's
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: like for me, for my brain, I'm not going to
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: go to someone that's had a brain aneurysm. My dead
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: family members, Hey, can you help me? Like I'm going
• 15:38
  Speaker 1: to go to a brain session. Yes, Like that's just
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: common sense in my head, It's one hundred percent.
• 15:42
  Speaker 2: And it's wild to see how people interpret things online
• 15:45
  Speaker 2: because obviously there wasn't a lot of context to that, right,
• 15:47
  Speaker 2: He's obviously going to interpret that in whatever way. But
• 15:49
  Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my goodness, Like I don't take things literally,
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: you know, And I'm like, right now, I'm just saying
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: and even through the video, I said, I respect people
• 15:58
  Speaker 2: who have been through it, and I want to know
• 16:00
  Speaker 2: that that person has sat on the other side of
• 16:02
  Speaker 2: this chair and has equally gone through what I have
• 16:04
  Speaker 2: gone through.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: Is so I know that they know how to walk
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: me through.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: I don't want somebody who's read a textbook and go,
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: I've lived a really easy life. I don't know how
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: to deal with this. But you know what x y
• 16:13
  Speaker 2: Z in this book says, da da da Yes, and
• 16:16
  Speaker 2: again like what you said, like there's a time and
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: a place for all of these things. Yeah, And of
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: course I'm going to go to the doctor if I
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: hurt myself or if the circumstance is right and good,
• 16:24
  Speaker 2: you know. But also when it comes to qualifications in
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: life coaching and in personal development, that's not what I require,
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: it's not what I.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: Look for, and both can be celebrated as well. Like
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: I used being a personal trainer for example, I remember
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: over the years, I had a lot of women to say, well,
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: I don't want to go to you because you've never
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: experienced what it's like to be overweight. I was like,
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: you're right, I haven't been overweight. Have I had body
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: dysmorphia and been beliemic and struggle with what I look
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: like for sure, But yeah, I haven't walked your shoes.
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: But I'm open and willing to hear in your story.
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: And I also have the tools and support about to
• 16:53
  Speaker 1: get you to the other side. And if that's for you, amazing.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: If it's not for you, totally get it. I would
• 16:57
  Speaker 1: understand why you want to go to someone who may
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: have struggled with their weight and come through the other side,
• 17:01
  Speaker 1: because you have that level of common ground of like
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: they get where I've been. Yeah, I'm not going to
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: take offense to that you've got the qualifications and you've
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: got the real life experience. Beautiful me. When I first
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: was going through the online trolling, I had never hired
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: a life coach. I don't know who to turn to,
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: and my personal assistant at the time was like, you
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: need to go to a psychologist. I was like absolute shit, scared,
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: turned up and ended up going to three and all
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: three of them were like, Oh, aren't you just blocking
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: delete them? If it was that easy, do you think
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: I'd be telling you that I don't want to be
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: here anymore? You don't think I've blocked and delete and
• 17:31
  Speaker 1: turned my comments off and trial that, and it's still
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: so noisy. You still get send things, you still see things.
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: People are following me home like they could not understand
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: the depth of it because they're not on social media,
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: they don't have Snapchat, they didn't they can't see the
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: online pages. And that's when I hired Alexi and Preston,
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: who were online online coaches who have been through what
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: I've been through. They've coach peop who have gone through
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: what I've gone through. And after the first session, I finally,
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: after like a year of considering not being here, I
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: saw that tiny bit of light tiny bit of hope
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: that I can get through this. In that sense, the
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: psychologist wasn't the right person for me at that time.
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: The three that I went to. I'm not saying psychologists
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: couldn't have helped me. Those particular ones couldn't at that time,
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: so they had no understanding of what I was going through.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: So it's like every scenario in situation is so different.
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: We're not bagging anyone out. I could see your point,
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: But someone that is a qualified psychologist, you could see
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: how they could get triggered by it. They might think
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: that you're saying that what they've studied isn't going to
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: be helpful or whatever.
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: But to add to that, if you're getting triggered by it,
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: there's something there for you.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: Yeah, do you know what I mean?
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: Like anyone like see for me, Like I have qualifications
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: in life coaching, I don't get triggered when I hear
• 18:33
  Speaker 2: somebody say that. Yeah, But if somebody wants somebody who
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: has qualifications and that's important to them, I don't get
• 18:37
  Speaker 2: triggered by that. If they want somebody who is a psychologist,
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to take offense to that because I'm
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: not what they're looking for. So if they are getting
• 18:44
  Speaker 2: triggered by it, and I get it if you are
• 18:46
  Speaker 2: totally here, and also like there's something underneath it for you,
• 18:49
  Speaker 2: like what part of you believes it that's true or
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: there's something more to explore there.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: Definitely, that's the thing that triggers. Hey, always, if you're
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: triggered with anything, it's scratching something within you that you're
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: insecure about that you don't know. That is an old wounded.
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: That's something to look at. Absolutely, And the same thing.
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: I had a similar experience with psychologists, Like before I
• 19:06
  Speaker 2: went down life coaching, I went to one psychologist and
• 19:09
  Speaker 2: it was enough to turn me off. And again I
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: think that I've met some really amazing psychologists and we
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: work with some now than we do, and they're incredible
• 19:16
  Speaker 2: human beings. But this specific one, I remember going and
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: telling her about the video that the video experience, that's
• 19:23
  Speaker 2: why I went to her and talking to her about
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: that in another situation, and I don't know why, but
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: I just felt like she was judging me. It was like, oh,
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: for the tape, yeah, and like just what I was
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: telling her, And again, this could have totally could have
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: been some projection here on my part, but the energy
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: that I got from her was like it's not that bad. Oh,
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: oh you're here for that, Like it felt like, oh,
• 19:45
  Speaker 2: she was dismissing me a little bit, And I just
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: remember not feeling fully safe to then bring it in
• 19:50
  Speaker 2: because I felt like what I was coming in for
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: wasn't quote unquote big enough, when in my head it
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: felt so much bigger and it had completely changed my world.
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: I don't think she fully grasped the sexual shame that
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: I was feeling and going through because she obviously had
• 20:03
  Speaker 2: never been through something like that. Maybe that was a
• 20:06
  Speaker 2: very unique experience from home movie shouldn't seen anybody who'd
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: been through something like that. And it was enough for
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: me to never go back to one again. Yes, And
• 20:12
  Speaker 2: then I was like, Okay, maybe this isn't the route
• 20:14
  Speaker 2: that I want to go down. I need somebody who
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: is going to be more open, who's going to be
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: able to share with.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: Me their experience as well.
• 20:20
  Speaker 2: Because this psychologist was very no pad pen yep, and
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: it wasn't warm enough for me. I needed a little
• 20:27
  Speaker 2: bit more. And then I went down life coreaching and
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: that honestly changed my life. I owe my life to
• 20:31
  Speaker 2: this work and I wouldn't take it back for a second.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: But again, like what you said, we're not shitting on
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: psychologists or anything like that, because there is a time
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: and a place for those things. And if you are
• 20:40
  Speaker 2: somebody who prefers that, you're allowed to if that's important
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: to you, it's allowed to be important to you.
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: But this is my opinion. Yeah, yeah, everyone's different. Everyone's
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: allowed to have their opinion. What feels good for that absolutely, yeah, Okay.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: The next one that I thought was super interesting was
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: my dancing videos. It's crazy the shame that comes on board.
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: And I knew, I knew when I uploaded this clip
• 21:00
  Speaker 1: that I would get more because of what I was wearing.
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: It was a lot more sexual. The actual class wasn't
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: a heels class, it was a sensual class, so the
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: moves were a lot more sexual. And I was wearing
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: like these black undies that do write up my ass
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: with stockings and I just had like a strepless bood.
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: But it was definitely more sexy, looked like a little bunny.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: Had so good playboy, so good, so good. But yeah,
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: every time I post a heels class, I get slammed
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: with you're a mum. You shouldn't wear that, you shouldn't
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: post that your kid's gonna get bullied, your husband must
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: be so embarrassed, like so many projections. And I'm like, like,
• 21:37
  Speaker 1: none of that is true for me. My husband does
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: not mind at all. I feel confident. Why becoming a
• 21:41
  Speaker 1: mom does that mean that I can't dress a certain
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: way or act a certain way or feel a certain
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: way because I'm a mom and mind meant to just
• 21:47
  Speaker 1: switch off all of my sexual desire. I meant to
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: not be horny and not be sexy and not want
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: to be attractive to my husband. Like does that happen
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: when you become a mum? Who told you that? Like?
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: Where does that come from? Absolutely? Not opposite. For me,
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: it's cool when it comes in because I get to
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: try to open up conversations with women and see where
• 22:03
  Speaker 1: these comments are coming from. And a lot of the
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: time they quite receptive, like oh, well, you know, I've
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: just grown up thinking that da da da, or my
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: mum said dah da da, And it's like, okay, we'll
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: let unpack that together. Yeah, it's super interesting, but it
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: makes me want to post more. I'm like, I want
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: to normalize it. Yeah, this is okay. Yes, I'm probably
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: one of the oldest in the room. Do I give
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: to flying foks? No, I don't care. I'm there for myself.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: I'm there because it makes me feel feminine, gets me
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: in my body. I've danced since I was a little girl.
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: This then leaks into my relationship. I feel good in
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: my sexual energy. It's like this fire energy in cyber
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: that I feel when I go to dance class. I
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: think it's beautiful and I want more women to experience this.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: And the more that I post about it, the more
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: like it's like exposure therapy. I hope it becomes a
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: little bit more normal. And when I first saw women
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: dancing like this, I was so triggered but also so curious.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: I remember messaging my girlfriend Katie and I saw her
• 22:49
  Speaker 1: at a class and I was like, what kind of dancing
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: is this? And where do you do this? And do
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: you feel weird wearing that to dance class? And she
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: was super like blase as She's like, oh no, its
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: just this lady called Misha and we just choose a
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: song and da dada. It's so fun. And then I
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: got a group with my girlfriend's together and we did it.
• 23:03
  Speaker 1: It was so much fun, so good. You know. It
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: also has taken me a little while to not wear
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: active wear to the class, which I thought was interesting,
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: Like I did feel a little bit like, oh, this
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: feels different way edgy, Yeah, edgy wearing lingerie. But then
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: I look around and every girl's in lingerie, like we
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: were the odd ones out inactive wear. Everyone's in laundree
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: and geeshims and body suits and they get so creative
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: age bitter and sparkles and the hair, and it's just
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: it's so beautiful. And when you're in that room, in
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: that environment, it is normal. It's so normal to be celebrated,
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: to be so essentially embodied and just expressing yourself in
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: that way and having fun with other women are so beautiful.
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: I like what you said about it being celebrated, because
• 23:42
  Speaker 2: it is.
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: When you're in that room.
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: You feel so empowered to be in your feminine energy,
• 23:47
  Speaker 2: Whereas like when sometimes when you first walk into those
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: classes you feel a bit scared, or even when you're
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: watching it on social media, you're having all these emotional
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: triggers come up for you and you're feeling like, oh,
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: this feels edgy, this feels scary. I feel triggered by this.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: I don't want to look I want to look away.
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: But when you're in that room, sure those things may
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: come up for you, but it does. It gets normalized
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: for you because it safe to be in that energy
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: and it's safe for you to explore that within yourself
• 24:08
  Speaker 2: without any judgment. And I think that's the power of
• 24:11
  Speaker 2: these spaces, you know. I remember when similar experience. I
• 24:14
  Speaker 2: used to get so triggered when people would post online
• 24:17
  Speaker 2: when they would dance, because I'd be like, are you
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: doing that for attention? But that was when I didn't
• 24:22
  Speaker 2: acknowledge that I also equally could want for attention, So
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: it was like I was judging them because I was like,
• 24:28
  Speaker 2: oh my gosh, you should be so like well put
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: together on social media and you shouldn't show these parts
• 24:33
  Speaker 2: and it's supposed to be special for your partner and
• 24:35
  Speaker 2: all of the projections. Until I explored with myself that
• 24:38
  Speaker 2: I was so sexually suppressed. And then it wasn't until
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: I started opening up myself to that world again and
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: feeling good in my own pleasure and feeling good in
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: my sensuality and wanting to explore that beautiful feminine energy
• 24:50
  Speaker 2: did I allow myself to celebrate other women who would
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: do that, like this is allowed, this is beautiful, Like
• 24:55
  Speaker 2: why would we not want to be in this energy?
• 24:57
  Speaker 2: And you know it's crazy too, because I recently started
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: posting my journey as well.
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: I really want to document it because.
• 25:03
  Speaker 2: It feels so edgy and scary of like going back
• 25:06
  Speaker 2: to something new and feeling like a beginner again and
• 25:08
  Speaker 2: messing up and making mistakes and being seen and doing that.
• 25:12
  Speaker 2: I actually had a couple of my clients message me,
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: one in particular message me and then talk to me
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: about it on our session, which I obviously can't disclose
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: much about, but she had a lot of tears come
• 25:21
  Speaker 2: from it, and it obviously activated her because she has
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: a desire to want to be that femininely expressed and
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: it just goes to show that like, yes, you may
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: be triggered by it, things may come up for you,
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: but it's like it's there because it's supposed to be explored,
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: you know. And initially she was like Tiana, I wanted
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: to look away, but she's like I couldn't, and to
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: watch the three times and then it was like tears.
• 25:44
  Speaker 2: I want to be like that, I want to feel that,
• 25:46
  Speaker 2: and I think that's a really beautiful thing that we
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: can take away from all of this is that, yes,
• 25:50
  Speaker 2: it may trigger you, but it's there for you to explore,
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: and when you do, it will be so freeing.
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: And that's the thing. It's freeing once you go through
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: this experience, and we know because we've been through it.
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: Once I went through that experience of dancing and even
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: wearing longerine, feeling so empowered and not judging myself elf,
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: I no longer judge anyone else. Yeah, when I judge myself,
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: I'm actually judging everyone else around. If I'm judging everyone else,
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: it's because I'm judging myself. Now, there's no judgment if
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: a girl's in a g string, or if she makes
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: her moves even more sexy, I'm like, oh my god,
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: how did she do that? Yeah? Are yours on the
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: ground watching these dance teachers. We both had dance teachers
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: in front of us, so it's like great because now
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: we don't know how to do a move. We're going
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: to watch them, but both of us just like, oh
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: my god, these women are so hot.
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: We're just sitting there with our hands over our faces, like,
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: oh my god, how does she move?
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: Like that back, it's so flexible. One of the comments
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: that agether that makes me laughs, like, oh my god,
• 26:40
  Speaker 1: your poor husband leads nothing to the imagination, Like you're
• 26:43
  Speaker 1: showing this to everyone. I'm like, I do a lot
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: more fine closed doors and dance like this. Yeah, Like,
• 26:49
  Speaker 1: don't you worry. This is literally in a dance class
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: of forty women. It's fine. I'm going to lead more
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: to the imagination. Oh, like, no offense, a lot of
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: fun behind though sex literally you know. Yeah, there's so
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: many projections now we can see them for what they are.
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: But yeah, we want to post more about it because
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: how we feel we dance. We want every other woman
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: to be able to experience this.
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: And this is also an extension of what we like
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: to do on the podcast. We love to talk about
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: sex and intimacy and self pleasure and all of these
• 27:14
  Speaker 2: different aspects and components to intimacy because it is a
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: taboo topic and there's.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: So much shame around it.
• 27:20
  Speaker 2: Why you're so suppressed around it, Well, when you aren't
• 27:23
  Speaker 2: suppressed in it, it's a really beautiful thing and.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: You can't be in denial to say that you're seeing
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: on the other side of this podcast, being like, oh,
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: I don't like sex, I don't like to have orgasms,
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: I don't want to feel sexy. I don't want to
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: be connected to my partner. Bullshit, you're lying, You're actually lying.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: Why are you depriving yourself of that and your relationship?
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: Don't do that. You're allowed to enjoy all of that,
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: and you're allowed to talk about it. But it's sad
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: to me that so many women have so much shame
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: and don't have the sisterhood around them to feel comfortable
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: to bring all of this in. That's why we talk
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: about it. Absolutely, we get to be your sister.
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: Absolutely, and a lot of it does come from our conditioning. Shit,
• 27:55
  Speaker 2: but how much of that do we continue on?
• 27:57
  Speaker 1: Exactly? When does it get to a point where you go,
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: I'm going to do things.
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, If you're twenty thirty, forty fifty sixty, yeah, and
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: you're continuing on your conditioning, that's a choice, and I
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: get it. Sometimes it's too uncomfortable to look at We're like, oh,
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: I need to look away because right now this is dysregulating.
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: I get that, I've been there, But when it's not
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: feeling disregulating, it's like you get to lean in and
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: actually transform the relationship you have with yourself. And you
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: know what, also, being sexually expressed and embodied actually transforms
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: your confidence. If you're lacking in confidence and you're like, oh,
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: classes I feel shy and I'm timid and I don't
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: want to reach out to people. When you are anchored
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: in your pleasure and your sensual energy, trust me, you
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: do not feel like that life force. You're also more bold,
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: you're more opinionated, you feel anchored in your truth, and
• 28:37
  Speaker 2: there's so many beautiful benefits for you actually exploring this
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: area of your life. And I bet from this conversation
• 28:44
  Speaker 2: there's this little nickel in the back of your head.
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: We're like, I am so curious. Yeah, I want to
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: explore this. Don't shame yourself into, you know, stopping yourself
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: from doing that, because you get to definitely, And.
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: We always have to remember our kids are watching, and
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: not in the sense of like we are trying to
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: empower our three year old to dance like this. But
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: when my little girl is a teenager and a young
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: adult and growing into a woman, I want to these
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: conversations with her. I want to talk about my experience
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: and how I grew up and the limiting beliefs in
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: the condition that I grew up with, and I don't
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: want to have any of that. I don't want to
• 29:12
  Speaker 1: having any shame with her body or how she feels,
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: or wanting to explore or just ask questions. I want
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: that to feel so comfortable with her because I didn't
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: have that. But that starts with me. I have to
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: not be uncomfortable talking about and exploring it and binding
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: those deeper layers of who I am. So I've got
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: to do this work so that when she is old enough,
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: I can lead her in the right way. We had this.
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: Conversation the other day about how both of our parents
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: or mums weren't able to have those conversations with us
• 29:38
  Speaker 2: when it came to sex and intimacy and iteration everything.
• 29:41
  Speaker 2: We had to figure things out on our own. And
• 29:43
  Speaker 2: then I think my mum even the other day she
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: said in the kitchen, she was like, oh, I probably
• 29:46
  Speaker 2: wasn't the best with that sort of stuff because of
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: her own way of how she was taught, Like, we
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: get to stop the onslaugh cycle.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: We were taught, yeah, break the cycle.
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, from all the generational conditioning and beliefs that we've
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: created and been passed along.
• 30:00
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so cool. It's really exciting what we get
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: to change and how we get to do things differently.
• 30:04
  Speaker 2: And it doesn't it's not uncomfortable, No, it is, it
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: really is. But you can do hard things and just
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: because it's uncomfortable doesn't mean that you should stop exploring it.
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: Or just because someone online tells you you're a mom
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: and you shouldn't wear that, that you should stop wearing that.
• 30:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and like how much you weight are you giving
• 30:18
  Speaker 2: people's words who actually irrelevant to your life?
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: You don't even know them. Don't take advice from somebody.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: Would's what places with literally that you don't know, you
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: don't respect. Yeah, yeah, it's such a cool conversation and
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: we ain't stopping so And also, no one's making you
• 30:32
  Speaker 1: watch the dance videos. If you see the red light
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: or you see the pink light and you see me
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: and mal Lita, do you know what's coming up? You
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: can scroll along, just use that finger tap past girlfriend.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: No one's making you bet here soon, No, no, no,
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: but I beat you're watching. Yeah, at least four times
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: I watched the other ten times I literally watch it
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: actually stunt like back back back and Amy's and the
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: teachers and egs. Oh yeah, I love seeing everyone do
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: the dance because it's like the same moves and everyone
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: adds their own twist and like a style into it.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: It's so cool to see that being expressed the way
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: someone's body moves. It's just so beautiful. It is beautiful. Yeah.
• 31:09
  Speaker 2: Well that's all for now, but I'm sure we'll be
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: back with more comments.
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: Very sad. Let us know if you guys enjoyed this
• 31:15
  Speaker 1: type of episode, because I think it's really cool conversations
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: to have and it's.
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: Spicy, but yeah, a little bit spicy, but also just
• 31:20
  Speaker 2: the reality of, you know, the things that most people
• 31:22
  Speaker 2: don't talk about.
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because a lot of people do get judged.
• 31:26
  Speaker 2: For talking about things like for sure, and if they
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: have something to push back on. But I think it
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: could be really cool for you to just support you
• 31:32
  Speaker 2: in knowing how to deal with these things if they
• 31:34
  Speaker 2: do come up.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: You know, no matter who you are, whether you have
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: a big following or not, even in your real life's
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: people going to better going to disagree with what you
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: do or what you're saying. And we're all different, we're all
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: out our opinions, but let's talk about it and not
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: judge or shame someone else for doing something different.
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: And something else as well, like this conversation thinking back
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: to me ten years ago would have been so helpful
• 31:52
  Speaker 2: for the version of me who didn't know how to
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: stand up for my opinion or stand up for what
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: I believe in, or even know how to deal with
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: when like conflict in general, when somebody would push back
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: on something that I had said. If this episode just
• 32:02
  Speaker 2: helps you go, oh wow, Okay, maybe it's not a
• 32:04
  Speaker 2: big of a day and I don't have to give
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: their words weight, amazing.
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: So cool. I absolutely love that. Thanks for joining us.
• 32:11
  Speaker 1: We'll see you for our best episode on a Wednesday. Bye.