Latest / The Daily Reset Podcast / Why understanding your patterns never changes them

Transcript

Why understanding your patterns never changes them · The Daily Reset Podcast

• 0:04
  SPEAKER_00: Hi, it's Laurel here and welcome to day four of the masterclass.
• 0:11
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just sharing my screen and we will get started.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, let's get a full view of this.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so let's get back to the slide one.
• 0:29
  Yeah,
• 0:30
  so today we are going to look at why we keep repeating the same
• 0:34
  patterns.
• 0:36
  SPEAKER_00: And just to let you know, nothing has gone wrong.
• 0:42
  SPEAKER_00: You are just running a script that you didn't actually choose.
• 0:48
  And we're going to today look a bit more closely about what
• 0:51
  could be happening here.
• 0:53
  and some of the reasons why so that you can get an idea of
• 0:56
  perhaps some of the
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_00: things that you've been drifting into.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: And this is really information that we can use together.
• 1:08
  So yesterday we're looking at your use of AI on your tech stack
• 1:14
  and what stays
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_00: uniquely human and how we can create more space for ourselves by building
• 1:22
  Using technology in ways that support human flourishing and
• 1:26
  today we are going to
• 1:29
  look at what's underneath and why it might not be moving as you
• 1:35
  would have hoped.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: So this today is all about patterns and I
• 1:42
  Often believe or get called a pattern spotter or able to
• 1:49
  identify all these
• 1:50
  patterns and that is great because you know I'm really using
• 1:57
  balance able to help
• 2:00
  uncover some of these repeat patterns but everything starts
• 2:04
  with awareness and you
• 2:07
  have to recognize what the patterns are that are running in the
• 2:09
  background
• 2:12
  and because a lot of us have been repeating these for years and
• 2:16
  sometimes decades
• 2:17
  without realising we might be entering similarly unhealthy
• 2:22
  relationships or we keep
• 2:24
  hitting professional ceilings in our career or we're struggling
• 2:29
  with financial
• 2:30
  habits year after year and it's not a lack of effort once the
• 2:35
  pattern is recognised
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: there is the possibility for change
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_00: And what I call this is pattern utilization.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_00: So once you recognize it, you can use it strategically.
• 2:48
  SPEAKER_00: And instead of reacting to situations,
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: you can leverage those patterns to produce better outcomes.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: And this is what we're going to be looking at today.
• 2:59
  In life,
• 2:59
  it means asking questions like what behaviors consistently lead
• 3:03
  to my best outcomes?
• 3:05
  and what habits repeatedly hold me back and how can I
• 3:09
  intentionally use patterns
• 3:10
  that serve me and when you begin utilizing patterns instead of
• 3:18
  reacting to them you
• 3:19
  shift from passive living to proactive design and that's where
• 3:22
  we want to get to
• 3:23
  which takes me to my next step of pattern creation and what
• 3:29
  we're going to be doing
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_00: tomorrow which is designing your life and
• 3:33
  what pattern creation is is at the highest level you move
• 3:36
  beyond recognizing and
• 3:37
  using patterns to beginning to create them this is where it
• 3:41
  becomes deliberate
• 3:42
  rather than accidental and highly successful individuals design
• 3:47
  their routine
• 3:48
  systems environments and that produce the results they want
• 3:52
  instead of hoping for
• 3:53
  success they're building the path for patterns that make
• 3:57
  success inevitable and
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: it's
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_00: Daily habits like structured morning routines,
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_00: consistent learning patterns,
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: intentional health and fitness systems,
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_00: scheduled reflection and planning.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_00: And they're not random behaviors.
• 4:13
  They're consciously created patterns designed to produce
• 4:17
  consistent results.
• 4:19
  So your life today is largely the result of the patterns that
• 4:23
  you followed,
• 4:24
  SPEAKER_00: some consciously and many unconsciously.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_00: But the encouraging news is that patterns are not permanent.
• 4:31
  SPEAKER_00: They can be changed, redesigned and replaced.
• 4:35
  And understanding our patterns,
• 4:36
  which we're going to do today,
• 4:38
  is the first step of that.
• 4:41
  So let's move into some of the patterns that we might have been
• 4:43
  repeating and see
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_00: if we can identify any.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_00: So moving on to what is holding you back from your purpose.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: And this is a common one that
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: People sense that a purpose is waiting or a direction is calling,
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: but something keeps getting in the way and how do you move past it?
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: So there's a lot of common blockers to purpose.
• 5:08
  We spoke a bit about fear,
• 5:10
  fear of failure or waiting for some sort of permission.
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_00: Perfectionism is a great blocker.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: Imposter syndrome.
• 5:21
  Overwhelm Not Knowing Where To Start Comparison And Old
• 5:25
  Identities That No Longer
• 5:26
  Fit And External Expectations And Fear Of Failure And Fear Of
• 5:33
  Success Really Just
• 5:35
  Keeps You From Trying You Know Both Are Protected But The
• 5:40
  Antidote To That Is To
• 5:42
  SPEAKER_00: Take Small Risks And Build Evidence That You Can Handle It
• 5:47
  Waiting for permission No one is coming to give you permission
• 5:50
  Not your parents,
• 5:51
  SPEAKER_00: not your boss,
• 5:52
  not the world The permission you need is your own So what are
• 5:57
  you waiting for?
• 5:59
  Overwhelm and paralysis So when the vision is big That first
• 6:04
  step can feel really
• 6:05
  impossible But you don't need to see the whole path You just
• 6:09
  need to take one step
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: And clarity comes through action Not just thought
• 6:14
  SPEAKER_00: And moving past the blocks.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: So just name the block.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_00: Awareness is the power.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_00: Challenge the belief behind it,
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: which we're going to get into today and take one small action anyway.
• 6:27
  And building momentum through repetition is what this is all
• 6:29
  about and get support,
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: a mentor,
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: a coach.
• 6:32
  SPEAKER_00: You don't have to do it all alone.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: And purpose isn't really found.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's uncovered by removing what's in the way.
• 6:42
  Next thing we're going to look at recalibration so we live in a
• 6:47
  world that is
• 6:49
  obsessed with reinvention or quit your job burn your life down
• 6:53
  start over become
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: someone else but most people don't actually need reinvention they need
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: recalibration and we spoke about the um
• 7:04
  arrival of drift and that drift happens slowly and it's not
• 7:08
  through dramatic
• 7:08
  decisions but thousands of small unconscious ones and you start
• 7:12
  listening to
• 7:12
  yourself stop listening to yourself and override your needs and
• 7:16
  you stay busy
• 7:17
  instead of intentional and you keep performing instead of
• 7:21
  pausing and you become
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_00: productive but disconnected and
• 7:27
  SPEAKER_00: And eventually you just wake up one day feeling exhausted,
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_00: overwhelmed,
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: emotionally flat or quietly unfulfilled,
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: wondering,
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: how did I get here?
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what recalibration or reset is really about.
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: It's not about becoming someone else.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: It's about returning to yourself.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: Reinvention, on the other hand, is often exhaustion in disguise.
• 7:55
  The dangerous thing about drift is that your life can still
• 7:58
  look successful on the
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: outside while feeling deeply misaligned on the inside.
• 8:04
  SPEAKER_00: But underneath it all, something feels off.
• 8:07
  And most people think this feeling means they need to literally
• 8:12
  burn their life
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_00: down or reinvent it,
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: like a new career,
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_00: a new relationship,
• 8:16
  SPEAKER_00: a new city,
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_00: a new version of themselves.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_00: But often reinvention is just exhaustion.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_00: and Disguised as Transformation.
• 8:26
  And if you change everything externally without addressing your
• 8:30
  internal patterns,
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_00: usually you just recreate the same patterns in a different environment.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: So you can move somewhere and still feel disconnected,
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: start a different job,
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: still burn out,
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_00: build a successful business and still feel empty.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: So you really are taking yourself with you.
• 8:52
  SPEAKER_00: Because the issue was never your entire life.
• 8:55
  It was your calibration,
• 8:56
  the pace,
• 8:57
  the pressure,
• 8:58
  and your nervous system overload.
• 9:00
  That constant reacting instead of intentional living,
• 9:04
  which is what we're trying to get to.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_00: And the habits that slowly pulled you away from yourself.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_00: Reset or recalibration asks a different question.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_00: It's what if I don't need to become someone else?
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: What if I need to reconnect with who I already am underneath the noise?
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: And so a reset is not passive.
• 9:28
  SPEAKER_00: It's intentional.
• 9:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's creating space to ask some honest conversation questions.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: What's training you?
• 9:36
  SPEAKER_00: What matters to you now?
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_00: What patterns keep repeating?
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_00: What am I tolerating?
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: What would alignment actually look like in this season of my life?
• 9:46
  And it's not about five years ago or the version of success
• 9:49
  other people expect from you.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_00: It's actually now.
• 9:53
  And one of the hardest parts of recalibration is accepting that
• 9:58
  what once worked no longer does.
• 10:01
  And the version that you've built for survival may not be the
• 10:04
  version you need for
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: the next chapter.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_00: But that's not failure.
• 10:07
  SPEAKER_00: It's growth.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: Nature recalibrates constantly,
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_00: seasons change,
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: tides drift,
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  SPEAKER_00: rhythms evolve,
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  SPEAKER_00: and humans are supposed to evolve too.
• 10:17
  And the problem is that we try to hold on to old identities for
• 10:23
  long after we've outgrown them.
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: So where we need to get to is small, consistent recalibrations.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: And that real change rarely has
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: Happens through dramatic overnight reinvention.
• 10:37
  SPEAKER_00: It happens through small, consistent recalibrations.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: Better boundaries,
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_00: more honesty and rest,
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_00: less numbing,
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_00: more reflection,
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  SPEAKER_00: daily walks,
• 10:51
  SPEAKER_00: turning your phone off,
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_00: learning how to sit with yourself again.
• 10:55
  Those tiny shifts repeated consistently begin changing your
• 11:00
  emotional baseline,
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_00: your clarity,
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_00: and eventually your life.
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  SPEAKER_00: So your life is not shaped by one massive decision.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's shaped by your daily patterns and your day creates your life.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_00: So what if you're feeling overwhelmed and confused?
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  SPEAKER_00: And I wish I could tell you at some point this goes away,
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  SPEAKER_00: but success doesn't remove those feelings.
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  SPEAKER_00: There are signs that you're human.
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  SPEAKER_00: And the feelings aren't proof you're failing.
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  SPEAKER_00: Stop fighting the feeling.
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  The mistake most of us make is assuming that these feelings
• 11:42
  shouldn't be there.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_00: We resist them, we fight them, we judge them, try to fix them.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_00: We tell ourselves that once we've figured everything out,
• 11:50
  SPEAKER_00: we'll finally feel calm,
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_00: once the business grows,
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_00: once we launch the thing,
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_00: once we make the money,
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_00: once we feel ready.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_00: But what if that's not how this works?
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_00: Every worthwhile thing I've ever done has come with uncertainty.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_00: Every business, every career move, every recalibration.
• 12:10
  SPEAKER_00: Fear always showed up.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: Doubt always showed up.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_00: Confusion always showed up.
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_00: Not because I was doing something wrong, but because I was growing.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_00: So the moment you start thinking, why am I feeling like this?
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_00: This shouldn't be happening.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: I thought this, I was past this.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_00: I've done so much work on myself.
• 12:26
  SPEAKER_00: You've stepped into quicksand.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_00: Because now you're not only feeling the emotion, you're fighting it.
• 12:34
  SPEAKER_00: And that's where people get stuck.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_00: Not in the feeling itself.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's the resistance to the feeling.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_00: So nothing has gone wrong.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_00: Every shadow contains a gift.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_00: Feelings are energy.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_00: They're designed to move.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: We're not supposed to feel amazing all the time.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: We're not supposed to live permanently in joy, clarity and flow.
• 12:57
  The challenge frequencies exist for a reason and they're
• 13:01
  information for us so the
• 13:06
  problem is we become obsessed with escaping instead of
• 13:09
  listening to it so we'll be
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_00: digging into that as well.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_00: And this takes me to the next point.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_00: Just really checking in with your emotions.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_00: They do not need to be fixed and they need to be felt.
• 13:23
  And most of us are trying to rush through the day without
• 13:26
  pausing to notice how we feel.
• 13:28
  SPEAKER_00: But emotional awareness is the foundation of well-being.
• 13:32
  And when you don't notice your emotions,
• 13:37
  they accumulate and drive behavior unconsciously.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_00: They manifest as physical symptoms.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: They create disconnection.
• 13:45
  So awareness is the first step to regulation and there is a
• 13:50
  simple daily practice
• 13:51
  that you can just pause two or three times a day and ask what
• 13:54
  am I feeling right
• 13:55
  now where do I feel it in my body what triggered me and what do
• 13:58
  I need and it just
• 13:59
  takes two minutes and it changes everything you can just set a
• 14:03
  reminder on your
• 14:04
  phone or a sticky note or a habit stack and start with your
• 14:08
  body is often easier
• 14:09
  SPEAKER_00: than identifying your emotions and
• 14:12
  You could use an emotion wheel if you're not aware to name the
• 14:17
  emotion and just
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_00: don't judge what you find.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_00: Just notice it and respond with compassion.
• 14:22
  SPEAKER_00: What do I need right now?
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_00: Common emotions to notice are anxiety,
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: sadness,
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: anger,
• 14:28
  SPEAKER_00: joy,
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: fear,
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: calm and all emotions are valid.
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: They're all information.
• 14:35
  SPEAKER_00: And once you know how you can feel,
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: You can honour it.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: Don't dismiss it.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: Meet the need if you can.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: Express it safely.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: Journal, talk, move and let it pass.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_00: Emotions don't need to be fixed.
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_00: They need to be felt.
• 14:56
  The physiology of balance and why your nervous system really
• 15:00
  depends on rhythms of
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_00: stress and recovery.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: Balance isn't
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: Just a feeling it's a foundational human need.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_00: Our nervous systems thrive on rhythm,
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_00: stress,
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: then recovery,
• 15:14
  SPEAKER_00: focus,
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: then rest,
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: connection,
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_00: then solitude.
• 15:17
  This alternation between activation and relaxation is known as
• 15:21
  homeostasis and it's
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: essential for all living systems to function optimally.
• 15:29
  SPEAKER_00: Without balance, we break mentally.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: So this is where burnout, anxiety and fog come in.
• 15:35
  Physically,
• 15:36
  fatigue and illness and emotionally,
• 15:40
  irritability and disconnection.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_00: Chronic stress without adequate recovery leads to a lost load,
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_00: which is the psychological wear and tear that occurs when we
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_00: Remain in high alert states for too long.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_00: Over time,
• 15:56
  this imbalance contributes to numerous health problems from
• 16:00
  cardiovascular disease
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: to immune dysfunction.
• 16:05
  SPEAKER_00: So the science is clear.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: Regulation is resilience.
• 16:10
  Balance restores your system,
• 16:11
  fuels your clarity and reawakens your purpose.
• 16:15
  Establishing rhythms of engagement and recovery daily,
• 16:19
  weekly and seasonally
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_00: helps maintain optional functioning across all dimensions of life.
• 16:24
  SPEAKER_00: This doesn't mean equal time for everything,
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: but rather appropriate attention to each area based on current needs and
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: priorities.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_00: What if doing less is the answer?
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_00: And this is all about your health.
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_00: So if the greatest wealth is health,
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_00: yet for something so simple,
• 16:51
  SPEAKER_00: we seem to have made it incredibly complicated.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_00: Every day we're told about another thing we should be doing,
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_00: cold plunges,
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: red light therapy,
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: continuous glucose monitoring,
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_00: sleep trackers,
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_00: morning routines,
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_00: evening routines,
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_00: breath work,
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_00: ice baths,
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_00: optimized hydration,
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_00: gut protocols,
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_00: longevity supplements.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_00: And our bodies have really become projects, but
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_00: To be clear, I'm not talking about the practices you generally need.
• 17:19
  If your doctor's prescribed something and if a particular
• 17:23
  routine helps you manage
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: a health condition or a certain tool genuinely supports your wellbeing,
• 17:27
  SPEAKER_00: that's different.
• 17:28
  I'm talking about all the additions that were sold to us in the
• 17:32
  path to feeling
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_00: better and quietly became another thing to manage.
• 17:38
  So things like your morning routine that was supposed to make
• 17:41
  you feel free now
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_00: takes 90 minutes.
• 17:45
  The wellness stack that was supposed to simplify your life now
• 17:50
  requires a spreadsheet.
• 17:51
  The tracker that was supposed to help you understand yourself
• 17:55
  now tells you whether
• 17:57
  SPEAKER_00: you've had a good day before you even asked yourself the question.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_00: And underneath all
• 18:04
  Quintely,
• 18:04
  almost imperceptibly,
• 18:06
  a small voice asks,
• 18:08
  is this what well feels like?
• 18:10
  SPEAKER_00: Because sometimes it doesn't, sometimes it just feels like another job.
• 18:14
  So I think we've,
• 18:16
  a lot of us have fallen into this,
• 18:19
  something seductive trap of optimisation.
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_00: And
• 18:26
  it really is creates a lot of anxiety um so you the the target
• 18:31
  just keeps moving
• 18:32
  you hit 10 000 steps and you should be discover you should be
• 18:35
  doing 12 you improve
• 18:37
  your sleep and then learn about sleep stages you clean up your
• 18:41
  diet and then you
• 18:42
  worry about micronutrients um health is really a relationship
• 18:47
  and this is how we
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_00: should be looking at it um
• 18:50
  the journey has become a destination and the destination keeps
• 18:55
  moving further away
• 18:57
  but we shouldn't keep chasing the next health trends because
• 19:02
  we're not weak or
• 19:04
  gullible we're overwhelmed so this brings me to the power of
• 19:09
  subtraction an idea
• 19:12
  that's existed for thousands of years sometimes the most
• 19:15
  powerful thing you can do
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_00: is not add something it's remove something
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_00: And for me, I found myself that the basics never lost their power.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_00: Move your body,
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_00: eat real food most of the time,
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_00: sleep like sleep matters,
• 19:34
  SPEAKER_00: spend time with people you love,
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_00: get outside,
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_00: laugh,
• 19:38
  rest without feeling guilty and take breaks before your body
• 19:42
  forces you to.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: None of these things are particularly exciting.
• 19:46
  SPEAKER_00: They won't go viral on social media.
• 19:48
  Nobody's building a billion pound company around taking a walk
• 19:52
  with a friend,
• 19:53
  but they work.
• 19:54
  They've always worked and they'll still be working long after
• 19:57
  the latest protocol,
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: supplement or trend has been replaced by the next one.
• 20:04
  SPEAKER_00: Which takes me to exercise is not about aesthetics.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's about aligning with your design.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: and modern life is, has not a lot of movement.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_00: The human body really expects resistance,
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: load,
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: stretch,
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_00: rotation,
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_00: acceleration and deceleration and when it doesn't get that,
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_00: it adapts downwards.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: It's the use it or lose it.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's not a cliche here.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: It's physiology.
• 20:37
  We can scroll for hours and hours but yet we can't seem to find
• 20:40
  an hour to exercise.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_00: But your body is designed to move.
• 20:46
  SPEAKER_00: It's built for motion, not for chairs.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_00: For most of human history, movement wasn't optional.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_00: It was survival.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_00: And obviously, modern life is set up to
• 20:59
  you know be attached to our devices but you don't need the
• 21:03
  extreme you just need to
• 21:05
  a regular walk daily lift something heavy stretch your hips
• 21:10
  strengthen your back
• 21:11
  and get your heart rate up um so yeah um try to replace an
• 21:19
  episode with with doing
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_00: or scrolling with doing something practical um
• 21:26
  Practical fix is you can reduce the bar by just doing 20 to 30
• 21:30
  minutes a day.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: Momentum matters more than duration.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_00: Attach it to an existing habit.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_00: So walk while taking calls.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_00: Train immediately after work.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: Exercise before opening any apps.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_00: That habit stacking reduces decision fatigue.
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_00: Make it easier than streaming.
• 21:54
  SPEAKER_00: Keep workouts close visible,
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_00: build a small home routine,
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_00: choose simple movements,
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: remove complexity,
• 22:01
  SPEAKER_00: reduce friction and track your screen time honestly.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_00: Most people underestimate and awareness alone changes behaviour.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_00: And there's unlimited classes online.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_00: You know, you don't need gym access.
• 22:16
  SPEAKER_00: There is strength training,
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_00: pilates,
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_00: yoga,
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_00: hip,
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_00: mobility,
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: dance,
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_00: low impact workouts,
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_00: beginners programs,
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_00: all available instantly.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_00: Movement is a privilege.
• 22:27
  SPEAKER_00: There will come a time when it,
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_00: for everyone,
• 22:29
  SPEAKER_00: when movement becomes harder,
• 22:31
  SPEAKER_00: age will limit it,
• 22:32
  SPEAKER_00: injury may restrict it,
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: health may challenge it,
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_00: and the ability to move freely is not guaranteed.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's a gift.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: So use it while you have it.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_00: And nutrition.
• 22:45
  SPEAKER_00: So again,
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: going back to the sort of complexities that we have really put in place,
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_00: the human brain uses about 20% of the body's total energy.
• 22:58
  And even although it only represents a small proportion of the
• 23:01
  body weight.
• 23:02
  And so that means what we eat directly influences our ability
• 23:06
  to think clearly,
• 23:07
  SPEAKER_00: regulate our emotions and maintain stable energy.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_00: And blood sugar is particularly important.
• 23:14
  Diets in high and refined sugars and ultra processed foods can
• 23:19
  lead to spikes and
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_00: crashes in glucose level.
• 23:23
  SPEAKER_00: And those fluctuations often show up as fatigue,
• 23:26
  SPEAKER_00: irritability,
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_00: difficulty,
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_00: concentrating and cravings.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_00: So in contrast,
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: meals around whole foods including protein,
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_00: healthy fats,
• 23:36
  fibre and complex carbohydrates help regulate blood sugar and
• 23:41
  provide a more stable
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_00: supply of energy to the brain.
• 23:46
  Nutrition also influences the gut microbiome which is
• 23:50
  increasingly recognised as
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: playing a role in mood regulation and mental health.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_00: The gut and brain communicate through the gut-brain axis,
• 23:59
  SPEAKER_00: meaning that what we eat can affect not only physical health,
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_00: but our emotional well-being.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_00: And eating well is not about perfection or rigid diets,
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_00: it's about giving the body nutrients it needs to function.
• 24:13
  So nutrition is number one and then breathing and regulating
• 24:18
  your nervous system is number two.
• 24:20
  SPEAKER_00: So breathing is something we do automatically.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, one of the few bodily functions we can consciously control.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_00: This makes it a powerful tool for regulating the nervous system.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_00: When we're stressed,
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_00: breathing tends to be shallow and rapid,
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_00: activating the body's fight or flight response.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_00: And over time, this can keep the body in a constant state of tension.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_00: Slow, controlled breathing has the opposite effect.
• 24:45
  It activates the parasympathetic nervous system,
• 24:48
  sometimes called the rest and restore state.
• 24:51
  SPEAKER_00: This lowers heart rate,
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: reduces stress hormones and signals to the brain that it's safe to relax.
• 24:56
  Even a few minutes of slow breathing can begin to calm the body
• 25:00
  and improve focus.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_00: So simple techniques such as longer exhalations,
• 25:06
  diaphragmatic breathing or structured breath practices can
• 25:10
  shift our physiological
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: state really quickly.
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_00: And over time, these small choices compound.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Really kind of looking at simplicity.
• 25:22
  SPEAKER_00: So obviously we're living in a world which there's so much information,
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_00: more opinions,
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: notifications and pressure.
• 25:31
  but joy was never supposed to be complicated and real joy comes
• 25:38
  from clarity.
• 25:39
  SPEAKER_00: Clarity about who you are,
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_00: what matters to you,
• 25:43
  SPEAKER_00: what value,
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: what you value and what kind of life you actually want to live.
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_00: And when you become clear,
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_00: something powerful happens,
• 25:50
  SPEAKER_00: you relax,
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_00: the static disappears,
• 25:53
  SPEAKER_00: you stop trying to force yourself into places,
• 25:55
  roles and expectations that were never designed for you in the
• 25:58
  first place.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_00: You stop performing
• 26:02
  and masking and start becoming so most people are carrying way
• 26:08
  too much noise in
• 26:08
  their minds to hear themselves think but the truth is quiet
• 26:15
  this is why sometimes
• 26:16
  the most important thing you can do is step away from the noise
• 26:20
  and go and sit
• 26:20
  somewhere quiet sit with yourself breathe walk journal look at
• 26:24
  the sky listen to
• 26:26
  your own thoughts without interruption because underneath the
• 26:28
  chaos you already
• 26:30
  SPEAKER_00: know
• 26:31
  Simplicity is about removing what is unnecessary so you can
• 26:37
  focus on what matters,
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: your energy,
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_00: your purpose,
• 26:39
  SPEAKER_00: your relationships,
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: your work,
• 26:41
  SPEAKER_00: your well-being,
• 26:42
  SPEAKER_00: your creativity,
• 26:43
  your contribution and it's about creating enough space in your
• 26:46
  life to hear
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: yourself
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_00: And confidence is not built through external validation.
• 26:53
  Confidence comes from self-awareness and it comes from
• 26:56
  understanding your own
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: design,
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_00: your patterns,
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_00: your energy,
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_00: your strengths,
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_00: your needs,
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_00: your natural rhythm.
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_00: Your secret sauce is studying yourself, not becoming somebody else.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_00: This is the doing, the being is doing the doing.
• 27:14
  SPEAKER_00: Who you are shapes how you move through the world.
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: When you understand yourself deeply,
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_00: decisions become easier,
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_00: direction becomes clearer,
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_00: life flows differently,
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_00: and you stop fighting yourself.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: What if you don't know what to do and what's next?
• 27:39
  SPEAKER_00: And for me, this is about making the question really
• 27:44
  small so if you are in a situation where you don't know what to
• 27:52
  do with your life
• 27:54
  you need to practice making the question smaller until it gets
• 27:59
  onto a post-it note
• 28:01
  so for example what if I'm doing what am I doing with my life
• 28:08
  that's just too big
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_00: there's nothing to decide there
• 28:12
  what am I doing with this summer still too big a little bit
• 28:16
  more specific it's got
• 28:17
  a date on it but you can't do it because that's like it's the
• 28:22
  whole summer that's a
• 28:23
  hundred small decisions what about do I want to spend this
• 28:28
  summer building
• 28:29
  something resting or exploring now that's closer now there's a
• 28:33
  question with an
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_00: answerable with answerable options but still a bit big and then we get to
• 28:41
  This Week Do I Want To Start The Book I've Been Thinking About
• 28:44
  Plan The Trip Sign
• 28:45
  Up For A Workshop Or Block Off Real Rest Time Before I Decide
• 28:50
  Anything There Is So
• 28:52
  That's A Post-it You Can Answer It You Can Move It On And If
• 28:58
  You Notice What
• 28:59
  Happens What Am I Doing With My Life And Should I Block Off
• 29:03
  Rest Time This Week Are
• 29:04
  Technically About The Same Thing Your Life But One Of Them Is
• 29:08
  Answerable And The
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_00: Other Gets Done By Friday
• 29:11
  Yes,
• 29:12
  the mind will resist the practice,
• 29:15
  but the small question isn't important enough.
• 29:18
  SPEAKER_00: I need to figure the big thing out.
• 29:21
  This is the loop talking and the loop survives on size and the
• 29:25
  specific questions starve it.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_00: So the other question is, what if I never find my passion?
• 29:34
  SPEAKER_00: And passion is its own kind of fog.
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_00: And,
• 29:37
  SPEAKER_00: you know,
• 29:38
  SPEAKER_00: it promises that somewhere out there,
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_00: there's a singular calling and their job is to find that.
• 29:42
  SPEAKER_00: And if you don't, you failed, you wasted time.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_00: And if you do, congratulations, you arrived, you made it.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_00: Either way, your worth is on the line.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_00: And that's a lot to put on one word.
• 29:53
  SPEAKER_00: And I want to offer a different question, a different perspective.
• 29:57
  not what's my passion but what adds value to my life and what
• 30:02
  makes time stop for
• 30:03
  you what genuinely makes you feel better fills you up with
• 30:07
  light excitement
• 30:08
  appreciation is it creativity movement being around people who
• 30:13
  think out loud
• 30:14
  working with your hands long conversations solitude cooking for
• 30:18
  someone walking
• 30:19
  somewhere new you probably already know you just haven't been
• 30:23
  counting it as enough
• 30:25
  Because we've been taught that whatever lights us up has to
• 30:28
  scale into a career,
• 30:29
  SPEAKER_00: a calling,
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_00: an identity,
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_00: or it doesn't count.
• 30:33
  So we dismiss the things that quietly make us us and keep
• 30:36
  searching for some bigger
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_00: thing that's supposed to make sense of everything.
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_00: But the bigger thing isn't out there waiting.
• 30:44
  SPEAKER_00: It's already in motion every time you do what fills you up.
• 30:48
  the life worth living isn't built on one passion it's built on
• 30:51
  a hundred small
• 30:52
  returns to what makes you feel alive so how about instead of
• 30:56
  finding your passion
• 30:57
  you follow what feels like more of you more often I get this a
• 31:09
  lot as well how do
• 31:09
  you know if it's a sign so people often say they're waiting for
• 31:12
  a sign a sign to
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_00: leave their job start the business end a relationship move to a new city
• 31:18
  Finally Pursue The Thing That You Can't Stop Thinking About But
• 31:23
  The Problem Is That
• 31:24
  Most People Are Waiting For Certainty And Signs Rarely Arrive
• 31:28
  That Way They Arrive
• 31:30
  Quietly Through Repetition So It's Rarely A Big Booming Voice
• 31:36
  Coming From The
• 31:37
  Universe Telling You What To Do It's Usually Quietly And More
• 31:40
  Subtle And More
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_00: Persistent It's Often A Feeling That Keeps Returning And An Idea
• 31:46
  SPEAKER_00: that you can't seem to let go of a conversation that lands differently,
• 31:50
  SPEAKER_00: a book that says exactly what you needed to hear,
• 31:52
  SPEAKER_00: a thought that keeps showing up despite your efforts to ignoring it.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_00: And the interesting thing about signs is that they arrive
• 31:59
  SPEAKER_00: They often arrive through repetition.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_00: The same message appears in different places.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_00: Different people give similar advice.
• 32:05
  SPEAKER_00: Opportunities emerge around the same thing.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_00: You notice the same idea showing up again and again.
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_00: And at first it feels like coincidence.
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_00: Then it begins to feel like a pattern and patterns matter.
• 32:18
  SPEAKER_00: Often intuition and your body knows before your mind does.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_00: This is where intuition enters the conversation.
• 32:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's often misunderstood as something mythical.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_00: In reality,
• 32:29
  intuition is frequently your brain and nervous system
• 32:32
  processing information before
• 32:34
  your conscious mind has caught up and your body notices
• 32:37
  patterns long before your
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_00: thinking mind can explain them.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_00: So how do you distinguish intuition from fear?
• 32:46
  SPEAKER_00: Fear tends to be loud, urgent and chaotic.
• 32:49
  It catastrophizes,
• 32:50
  creates panic and demands immediate action and intention is
• 32:54
  usually quieter.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_00: It arrives as a calm,
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_00: knowing,
• 32:58
  a sense of clarity and a persistent feeling that something
• 33:01
  deserves your attention.
• 33:03
  It may still feel uncomfortable because growth is often
• 33:06
  uncomfortable but usually
• 33:08
  SPEAKER_00: doesn't feel frantic.
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_00: The Myth of Being Ready.
• 33:19
  SPEAKER_00: So, and why action creates motivation, not the other way around.
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_00: And this is an emotional problem, not a productivity one.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_00: At first glance, it sounds like a productivity problem, but it rarely is.
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_00: It's usually an emotional one.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_00: The things that feel like too much
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: are rarely too much because they're different, difficult.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_00: They feel heavy because of the meaning attached to them.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: Expectation,
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_00: fear,
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_00: fear of failure,
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_00: fear of judgment,
• 33:55
  SPEAKER_00: fear of discovering we might not be as capable as we hope.
• 33:59
  And sometimes the opposite fear appears too,
• 34:02
  fear of what it could actually mean if it works.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_00: So instead of starting, we wait.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_00: Until we feel ready but the longer we wait, the heavier things become.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_00: So readiness rarely arrives first.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_00: Stop trying to feel ready.
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_00: Readiness is a myth.
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_00: It arrives because of the action.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_00: You don't suddenly feel capable and then begin.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_00: You begin and you slowly start to feel capable.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_00: Sorry about that.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_00: So what might become possible if
• 35:12
  those patterns changed and we were able to look after the true
• 35:23
  needs that we have
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_00: without judgment on ourselves.
• 35:27
  So one small interruption for you this week is to name one or
• 35:32
  more of the patterns
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_00: that you keep repeating.
• 35:36
  name the need it's quietly feeding so is it trying to keep you
• 35:40
  safe or is it trying
• 35:42
  to protect you from your fear of failure and then take one
• 35:47
  small step smaller than
• 35:49
  your resistance not to fix it just to interrupt it you don't
• 35:53
  break a pattern by
• 35:56
  understanding it you break it by moving and you don't need to
• 36:01
  be ready tomorrow
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_00: we're going to start
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_00: the design phase.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need to know what's next.
• 36:06
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need to feel ready.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_00: You don't need to find your purpose.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_00: You need to just move from exactly where you are.
• 36:17
  And if you haven't already done so,
• 36:18
  take the balance reset at balance.ai word slash quiz.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I'll see you in the Zoom room tomorrow.