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Note 35: Before You Quit on Yourself, Listen to This · Notes to Her

• 0:17
  Hi
• 0:17
  and
• 0:18
  welcome
• 0:18
  back
• 0:18
  to
• 0:18
  Notes
• 0:18
  to
• 0:19
  Her
• 0:19
  the
• 0:19
  daily
• 0:19
  Pep
• 0:19
  Talk.
• 0:20
  I'm
• 0:20
  Yaya,
• 0:20
  your
• 0:21
  confidence
• 0:21
  and
• 0:21
  mindset
• 0:21
  coach,
• 0:22
  here
• 0:22
  to
• 0:22
  help
• 0:23
  you
• 0:23
  stop
• 0:23
  shrinking,
• 0:24
  stop
• 0:24
  overthinking,
• 0:25
  and
• 0:25
  stop
• 0:25
  abandoning
• 0:26
  yourself
• 0:27
  when
• 0:27
  things
• 0:27
  get
• 0:27
  uncomfortable.
• 0:29
  So
• 0:29
  before
• 0:29
  we
• 0:29
  go
• 0:29
  any
• 0:30
  further,
• 0:30
  make
• 0:30
  sure
• 0:30
  you
• 0:30
  subscribe
• 0:31
  so
• 0:31
  that
• 0:31
  you
• 0:31
  don't
• 0:31
  miss
• 0:32
  the
• 0:32
  next
• 0:32
  notes.
• 0:33
  Especially
• 0:33
  in
• 0:33
  this
• 0:34
  season
• 0:34
  when
• 0:34
  we're
• 0:34
  talking
• 0:35
  about
• 0:35
  being
• 0:36
  visible,
• 0:37
  having
• 0:37
  courage,
• 0:38
  and
• 0:38
  staying
• 0:38
  in
• 0:38
  the
• 0:39
  room
• 0:39
  even
• 0:39
  when
• 0:39
  it
• 0:40
  feels
• 0:40
  hard.
• 0:41
  Now
• 0:41
  listen.
• 0:42
  The
• 0:42
  world
• 0:42
  that
• 0:42
  we
• 0:42
  live
• 0:43
  in
• 0:43
  right
• 0:43
  now
• 0:43
  is
• 0:44
  a
• 0:44
  lot.
• 0:45
  Everything
• 0:45
  feels
• 0:46
  loud,
• 0:47
  heavy,
• 0:48
  uncertain,
• 0:50
  and
• 0:50
  life
• 0:50
  can
• 0:50
  be
• 0:51
  overwhelming.
• 0:52
  Sometimes
• 0:54
  you
• 0:54
  just
• 0:54
  want
• 0:54
  to
• 0:54
  stop
• 0:55
  trying.
• 0:55
  Not
• 0:55
  because
• 0:56
  you
• 0:56
  don't
• 0:56
  care,
• 0:56
  but
• 0:57
  because
• 0:57
  caring
• 0:57
  has
• 0:58
  started
• 0:58
  to
• 0:58
  hurt.
• 0:59
  So
• 0:59
  if
• 0:59
  you
• 1:00
  ever
• 1:00
  find
• 1:00
  yourself
• 1:00
  feeling
• 1:01
  tired,
• 1:01
  discouraged,
• 1:03
  or
• 1:03
  questioning
• 1:04
  if
• 1:04
  it's
• 1:04
  even
• 1:04
  worth
• 1:05
  it
• 1:05
  anymore,
• 1:06
  come
• 1:06
  sit
• 1:06
  with
• 1:06
  me
• 1:07
  for
• 1:07
  a
• 1:07
  few
• 1:07
  minutes.
• 1:19
  Now,
• 1:19
  from
• 1:19
  what
• 1:19
  I've
• 1:19
  seen,
• 1:20
  most
• 1:20
  women
• 1:20
  don't
• 1:20
  quit
• 1:21
  dramatically.
• 1:22
  They
• 1:22
  stop
• 1:23
  raising
• 1:23
  their
• 1:23
  hand.
• 1:24
  They
• 1:24
  stop
• 1:25
  sharing
• 1:25
  ideas.
• 1:26
  They
• 1:26
  stop
• 1:26
  letting
• 1:27
  themselves
• 1:27
  be
• 1:27
  seen.
• 1:28
  They
• 1:28
  don't
• 1:29
  announce
• 1:29
  it.
• 1:29
  They
• 1:30
  just
• 1:30
  pull
• 1:30
  back.
• 1:31
  They
• 1:31
  stop
• 1:31
  posting.
• 1:32
  They
• 1:32
  stop
• 1:33
  dreaming
• 1:33
  out
• 1:33
  loud.
• 1:34
  They
• 1:34
  stop
• 1:34
  believing
• 1:35
  the
• 1:35
  effort
• 1:35
  will
• 1:36
  pay
• 1:36
  off.
• 1:37
  And
• 1:37
  the
• 1:37
  thought
• 1:38
  usually
• 1:38
  sounds
• 1:39
  small
• 1:39
  and
• 1:39
  reasonable,
• 1:40
  like
• 1:41
  maybe
• 1:41
  this
• 1:41
  isn't
• 1:42
  for
• 1:42
  me.
• 1:43
  Maybe
• 1:43
  I'm
• 1:43
  forcing
• 1:44
  something.
• 1:45
  Maybe
• 1:45
  I
• 1:46
  should
• 1:46
  fall
• 1:46
  back
• 1:46
  for
• 1:46
  a
• 1:47
  while.
• 1:47
  Or
• 1:48
  maybe
• 1:49
  I'm
• 1:49
  doing
• 1:49
  too
• 1:49
  much.
• 1:51
  And
• 1:51
  I
• 1:52
  want
• 1:52
  to
• 1:52
  say
• 1:52
  this
• 1:52
  to
• 1:52
  you
• 1:53
  in
• 1:53
  the
• 1:54
  gentlest
• 1:54
  way
• 1:55
  possible.
• 1:56
  That
• 1:57
  thought
• 1:57
  doesn't
• 1:57
  mean
• 1:57
  that
• 1:58
  you're
• 1:58
  incapable.
• 1:58
  It
• 1:59
  usually
• 1:59
  means
• 1:59
  that
• 2:00
  you're
• 2:00
  in
• 2:00
  the
• 2:00
  middle.
• 2:01
  The
• 2:01
  messy
• 2:02
  middle,
• 2:02
  the
• 2:03
  stretching
• 2:03
  part.
• 2:04
  The
• 2:04
  part
• 2:04
  where
• 2:04
  the
• 2:04
  old
• 2:05
  version
• 2:05
  of
• 2:05
  you
• 2:05
  is
• 2:05
  tired
• 2:06
  but
• 2:06
  the
• 2:06
  new
• 2:06
  version
• 2:07
  isn't
• 2:07
  fully
• 2:08
  formed
• 2:08
  yet.
• 2:09
  Now,
• 2:10
  there
• 2:10
  are
• 2:10
  a
• 2:10
  lot
• 2:10
  of
• 2:10
  reasons
• 2:10
  why
• 2:11
  this
• 2:11
  urge
• 2:11
  shows
• 2:12
  up,
• 2:12
  and
• 2:12
  none
• 2:12
  of
• 2:12
  them
• 2:12
  mean
• 2:13
  that
• 2:13
  you're
• 2:13
  failing.
• 2:14
  Sometimes
• 2:14
  the
• 2:14
  excitement
• 2:15
  wears
• 2:15
  off.
• 2:16
  The
• 2:16
  vision
• 2:17
  was
• 2:17
  fun.
• 2:17
  The
• 2:17
  beginning
• 2:18
  felt
• 2:18
  motivating.
• 2:19
  But
• 2:19
  now
• 2:19
  it's
• 2:19
  real.
• 2:20
  Now
• 2:20
  it
• 2:21
  requires
• 2:21
  consistency.
• 2:22
  Now
• 2:22
  it
• 2:23
  asks
• 2:23
  more
• 2:23
  of
• 2:23
  you.
• 2:24
  Sometimes
• 2:25
  progress
• 2:25
  feels
• 2:25
  slower
• 2:26
  than
• 2:26
  you
• 2:26
  expected.
• 2:27
  You
• 2:27
  thought
• 2:28
  you
• 2:28
  feel
• 2:28
  more
• 2:28
  confident
• 2:28
  by
• 2:29
  now,
• 2:29
  more
• 2:29
  settled,
• 2:30
  more
• 2:30
  sure.
• 2:31
  Instead,
• 2:32
  you
• 2:32
  feel
• 2:32
  exposed.
• 2:33
  And
• 2:34
  sometimes
• 2:34
  you
• 2:34
  expect
• 2:35
  the
• 2:35
  confidence
• 2:35
  to
• 2:35
  feel
• 2:36
  good
• 2:36
  all
• 2:37
  the
• 2:37
  time.
• 2:38
  But
• 2:38
  nobody
• 2:39
  really
• 2:39
  talks
• 2:39
  about
• 2:39
  how
• 2:39
  growth
• 2:40
  can
• 2:40
  be
• 2:40
  lonely,
• 2:41
  how
• 2:41
  visibility
• 2:42
  can
• 2:42
  be
• 2:42
  uncomfortable,
• 2:43
  and
• 2:44
  how
• 2:44
  expanding
• 2:45
  can
• 2:45
  feel
• 2:45
  like
• 2:45
  grieving
• 2:46
  the
• 2:46
  version
• 2:46
  of
• 2:46
  you
• 2:46
  that
• 2:47
  felt
• 2:47
  safe.
• 2:49
  So
• 2:49
  when
• 2:49
  everything
• 2:49
  starts
• 2:50
  to
• 2:50
  feel
• 2:50
  heavy,
• 2:50
  your
• 2:51
  nervous
• 2:51
  system
• 2:51
  steps
• 2:52
  in
• 2:52
  and
• 2:52
  says,
• 2:53
  let's
• 2:53
  shut
• 2:53
  this
• 2:53
  down.
• 2:55
  Not
• 2:55
  because
• 2:55
  you're
• 2:55
  wrong,
• 2:56
  but
• 2:57
  because
• 2:57
  you're
• 2:57
  tired.
• 2:58
  And
• 2:58
  that
• 2:58
  makes
• 2:59
  so
• 2:59
  much
• 2:59
  sense.
• 3:00
  Now
• 3:01
  here's
• 3:01
  the
• 3:01
  reframe
• 3:02
  that
• 3:02
  I
• 3:02
  want
• 3:02
  to
• 3:02
  offer
• 3:02
  you.
• 3:03
  You
• 3:03
  don't
• 3:03
  have
• 3:04
  to
• 3:04
  quit
• 3:04
  on
• 3:04
  yourself
• 3:04
  in
• 3:05
  order
• 3:05
  to
• 3:05
  take
• 3:05
  care
• 3:05
  of
• 3:06
  yourself.
• 3:07
  Pausing
• 3:07
  is
• 3:07
  not
• 3:08
  quitting.
• 3:08
  Resting
• 3:09
  is
• 3:09
  not
• 3:09
  retreating.
• 3:10
  Slowing
• 3:11
  down
• 3:11
  is
• 3:12
  not
• 3:12
  going
• 3:12
  backward.
• 3:13
  Sometimes
• 3:14
  the
• 3:14
  bravest
• 3:14
  thing
• 3:15
  you
• 3:15
  can
• 3:15
  do
• 3:15
  is
• 3:16
  stay.
• 3:16
  But
• 3:17
  change
• 3:17
  the
• 3:17
  pace.
• 3:18
  Quitting
• 3:19
  says
• 3:19
  I
• 3:19
  can't
• 3:20
  do
• 3:20
  this.
• 3:20
  Pausing
• 3:21
  says
• 3:21
  I'm
• 3:22
  listening
• 3:22
  to
• 3:22
  myself.
• 3:23
  And
• 3:24
  those
• 3:24
  are
• 3:24
  two
• 3:24
  very
• 3:25
  different
• 3:25
  energies.
• 3:26
  You
• 3:26
  don't
• 3:27
  need
• 3:27
  to
• 3:27
  disappear
• 3:27
  to
• 3:27
  be
• 3:28
  safe.
• 3:28
  You
• 3:29
  don't
• 3:29
  need
• 3:29
  to
• 3:29
  erase
• 3:29
  your
• 3:30
  dreams
• 3:30
  to
• 3:30
  survive
• 3:31
  this
• 3:31
  moment.
• 3:32
  You
• 3:32
  are
• 3:32
  allowed
• 3:33
  to
• 3:33
  honor
• 3:33
  your
• 3:33
  limits
• 3:34
  without
• 3:34
  abandoning
• 3:35
  what
• 3:35
  matters
• 3:36
  to
• 3:36
  you.
• 3:37
  So
• 3:37
  if
• 3:37
  you're
• 3:38
  in
• 3:38
  that
• 3:38
  I
• 3:38
  want
• 3:38
  to
• 3:38
  quit
• 3:39
  headspace,
• 3:39
  try
• 3:40
  this
• 3:40
  instead.
• 3:41
  Ask
• 3:42
  yourself,
• 3:43
  what
• 3:43
  made
• 3:43
  me
• 3:44
  want
• 3:44
  to
• 3:44
  quit
• 3:44
  today?
• 3:46
  Name
• 3:46
  the
• 3:46
  feeling.
• 3:47
  Exhaustion.
• 3:49
  Disappointment.
• 3:50
  Fear.
• 3:52
  Then
• 3:53
  ask,
• 3:53
  what
• 3:53
  do
• 3:53
  I
• 3:54
  actually
• 3:54
  need
• 3:54
  right
• 3:55
  now?
• 3:56
  Not
• 3:56
  motivation.
• 3:58
  Not
• 3:58
  discipline.
• 3:59
  Maybe
• 4:00
  it's
• 4:00
  support.
• 4:01
  Maybe
• 4:01
  rest.
• 4:02
  Maybe
• 4:02
  reassurance.
• 4:04
  What's
• 4:05
  one
• 4:05
  small
• 4:05
  way
• 4:06
  I
• 4:06
  can
• 4:06
  stay
• 4:06
  connected
• 4:07
  without
• 4:07
  forcing
• 4:08
  momentum?
• 4:10
  One
• 4:10
  honest
• 4:10
  conversation.
• 4:12
  One
• 4:12
  note
• 4:12
  to
• 4:13
  yourself.
• 4:14
  One
• 4:14
  breath
• 4:14
  where
• 4:15
  you
• 4:15
  don't
• 4:15
  judge
• 4:15
  yourself.
• 4:17
  You
• 4:17
  don't
• 4:17
  need
• 4:18
  a
• 4:18
  breakthrough
• 4:18
  today.
• 4:19
  You
• 4:19
  just
• 4:20
  need
• 4:20
  to
• 4:20
  not
• 4:21
  disappear
• 4:21
  from
• 4:22
  your
• 4:22
  own
• 4:22
  life.
• 4:24
  Now.
• 4:25
  Wanting
• 4:25
  to
• 4:25
  quit
• 4:26
  does
• 4:26
  not
• 4:26
  make
• 4:27
  you
• 4:27
  weak.
• 4:28
  It
• 4:28
  means
• 4:28
  that
• 4:28
  you've
• 4:29
  been
• 4:29
  trying.
• 4:30
  It
• 4:30
  means
• 4:30
  that
• 4:30
  you
• 4:30
  care.
• 4:31
  It
• 4:31
  means
• 4:32
  that
• 4:32
  you're
• 4:32
  stretching
• 4:33
  beyond
• 4:33
  what's
• 4:34
  familiar.
• 4:35
  And
• 4:35
  I
• 4:35
  would
• 4:35
  rather
• 4:36
  see
• 4:36
  you
• 4:36
  take
• 4:36
  a
• 4:36
  breath
• 4:37
  today
• 4:37
  and
• 4:37
  stay
• 4:38
  than
• 4:38
  walk
• 4:38
  away
• 4:39
  from
• 4:39
  something
• 4:39
  meaningful
• 4:40
  just
• 4:40
  because
• 4:40
  it
• 4:41
  got
• 4:41
  uncomfortable.
• 4:42
  You're
• 4:43
  allowed
• 4:43
  to
• 4:43
  grow
• 4:43
  without
• 4:44
  punishing
• 4:44
  yourself
• 4:45
  in
• 4:45
  the
• 4:45
  process.
• 4:47
  So
• 4:48
  before
• 4:48
  you
• 4:48
  quit
• 4:48
  on
• 4:49
  yourself,
• 4:50
  before
• 4:50
  you
• 4:50
  shrink
• 4:51
  back,
• 4:52
  before
• 4:52
  you
• 4:52
  convince
• 4:53
  yourself
• 4:53
  that
• 4:53
  this
• 4:53
  was
• 4:54
  never
• 4:54
  meant
• 4:54
  for
• 4:54
  you,
• 4:55
  just
• 4:56
  pause.
• 4:57
  Because
• 4:58
  wanting
• 4:58
  to
• 4:58
  quit
• 4:59
  doesn't
• 4:59
  mean
• 5:00
  you're
• 5:00
  weak.
• 5:01
  It
• 5:01
  means
• 5:01
  you're
• 5:01
  trying.
• 5:02
  It
• 5:03
  means
• 5:03
  you
• 5:03
  care.
• 5:04
  It
• 5:04
  means
• 5:04
  that
• 5:05
  you're
• 5:05
  standing
• 5:05
  on
• 5:05
  the
• 5:05
  edge
• 5:06
  of
• 5:06
  something
• 5:06
  that
• 5:06
  matters.
• 5:09
  And
• 5:09
  if
• 5:09
  this
• 5:09
  note
• 5:10
  met
• 5:10
  you
• 5:10
  where
• 5:10
  you
• 5:10
  are,
• 5:11
  I
• 5:11
  want
• 5:12
  you
• 5:12
  to
• 5:12
  stay
• 5:12
  connected.
• 5:13
  The
• 5:13
  She's
• 5:14
  Limitless
• 5:14
  Insider
• 5:15
  is
• 5:16
  my
• 5:16
  email
• 5:16
  newsletter
• 5:17
  where
• 5:17
  I
• 5:17
  go
• 5:17
  deeper.
• 5:18
  It's
• 5:18
  where
• 5:19
  I
• 5:19
  send
• 5:19
  reminders,
• 5:20
  the
• 5:20
  mindset
• 5:21
  shifts
• 5:21
  and
• 5:22
  the
• 5:22
  grounding
• 5:22
  tools
• 5:23
  you
• 5:23
  need
• 5:23
  for
• 5:23
  those
• 5:24
  in
• 5:24
  between
• 5:24
  moments.
• 5:25
  The
• 5:25
  moments
• 5:26
  when
• 5:26
  you're
• 5:26
  tired,
• 5:27
  discouraged,
• 5:28
  or
• 5:28
  questioning
• 5:29
  yourself
• 5:29
  but
• 5:30
  still
• 5:30
  choosing
• 5:30
  not
• 5:30
  to
• 5:31
  quit.
• 5:32
  No
• 5:32
  noise,
• 5:33
  no
• 5:33
  pressure.
• 5:34
  Just
• 5:35
  honest
• 5:35
  support
• 5:35
  to
• 5:36
  help
• 5:36
  you
• 5:36
  keep
• 5:36
  showing
• 5:37
  up
• 5:37
  for
• 5:37
  yourself.
• 5:38
  So
• 5:38
  you
• 5:39
  can
• 5:39
  subscribe
• 5:39
  through
• 5:39
  the
• 5:40
  link
• 5:40
  in
• 5:40
  the
• 5:40
  show
• 5:40
  notes.
• 5:41
  And
• 5:41
  if
• 5:41
  this
• 5:42
  episode
• 5:42
  helped
• 5:43
  you
• 5:43
  even
• 5:43
  a
• 5:43
  little
• 5:43
  bit,
• 5:44
  don't
• 5:44
  forget
• 5:44
  to
• 5:45
  share
• 5:45
  it
• 5:45
  with
• 5:45
  another
• 5:45
  woman
• 5:46
  who's
• 5:46
  been
• 5:46
  quietly
• 5:46
  thinking
• 5:47
  about
• 5:47
  quitting
• 5:47
  on
• 5:47
  herself,
• 5:48
  too.
• 5:49
  You
• 5:49
  don't
• 5:49
  have
• 5:50
  to
• 5:50
  disappear
• 5:50
  to
• 5:50
  be
• 5:50
  safe.
• 5:51
  You
• 5:51
  don't
• 5:52
  have
• 5:52
  to
• 5:52
  quit
• 5:52
  to
• 5:52
  rest.
• 5:53
  You
• 5:54
  don't
• 5:54
  have
• 5:54
  to
• 5:54
  do
• 5:54
  this
• 5:55
  alone.
• 5:55
  I
• 5:56
  am
• 5:56
  right
• 5:56
  here
• 5:56
  to
• 5:56
  help
• 5:57
  you.