Latest / Brooke and Jeffrey: Phone Taps / Phone Tap PODCAST: Hilario Took Ur Lawn
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Jubles phone taps are hilarious, but being charged with DUI,
- 0:03Speaker 1: it's no laughing matter. Trust Jubles friends at one eight hundred,
- 0:07Speaker 1: dy away. If you're charged with a criminal offense, your
- 0:10Speaker 1: one call is one eight hundred, d uy away. Proud
- 0:13Speaker 1: supporters of Jubules phone taps one eight hundred. Do you
- 0:17Speaker 1: y away? He's another Jubils nun taps on the twenty
- 0:21Speaker 1: to me, I'm moving ninety two point five. Hello, this
- 0:25Speaker 1: is Kathy. Hi, there is Cathy there. This is Kathy.
- 0:29Speaker 1: I just said that. This is she. Oh okay, Hi, Kathy,
- 0:33Speaker 1: can I help you? Oh? Yes, my name is Hilario
- 0:36Speaker 1: and my boss isn't named Mike, and he hired me
- 0:39Speaker 1: to cut your lawn. I'm new. Wait, Mike hired you
- 0:42Speaker 1: to cut our lawn. Yes, Mike hired me the other day. Um,
- 0:47Speaker 1: so okay. He didn't say anything about Are you okay?
- 0:51Speaker 1: Go ahead? I'm sorry, I'm just in the middle of something.
- 0:53Speaker 1: Sorry about that. Go ahead. Well, I've got it all
- 0:56Speaker 1: loaded in the back of my truck and I'll probably
- 0:58Speaker 1: bring it back on Thursday. Okay, you're cutting our lawn
- 1:02Speaker 1: on Thursday. I didn't understand you. Oh I guess I
- 1:05Speaker 1: could get to the point. Um, in order to give
- 1:07Speaker 1: your lawn the perfect cut that it deserves, I thought
- 1:10Speaker 1: it would be best to take it back to my
- 1:11Speaker 1: apartment so I can deal with it there, and then
- 1:13Speaker 1: I will return it on Thursday. Look, I'm really busy
- 1:16Speaker 1: at work right now. Nothing you're saying is making any sense.
- 1:19Speaker 1: You just tell me what's going on. I'll return your
- 1:22Speaker 1: lawn on Thursday after I've done cutting it. But right
- 1:24Speaker 1: now it's in the back of my truck waiting to
- 1:27Speaker 1: be cut. You dug up one and put it in
- 1:29Speaker 1: your truck. Yes, I said I would return it on
- 1:32Speaker 1: Thursday so I can give your lawn the proper cut
- 1:34Speaker 1: that it deserves. Pulled up my damn lawn the brass
- 1:39Speaker 1: and I paid you have the down you pulled it up?
- 1:42Speaker 1: Are you crazy? My mom has always told me I'm
- 1:45Speaker 1: an out of the box thinker. I marched to the
- 1:47Speaker 1: beat of my own drummer. I believe. So. I just
- 1:50Speaker 1: wanted to tell you because my boss, Mike says that
- 1:53Speaker 1: I'm not really good at communicating. So I wanted to
- 1:55Speaker 1: communicate with you that the lawn will be back on
- 1:56Speaker 1: Thursday looking better than new, better than ever. Stop telling
- 2:00Speaker 1: me it's coming back. Stop saying you're bringing the grass back.
- 2:03Speaker 1: It makes no sense. No, I think I know the problem,
- 2:08Speaker 1: and you wanted it back before Thursday, and I don't
- 2:10Speaker 1: think to cut up my lad. There's a post on
- 2:14Speaker 1: a damn more over it, not cut it up and
- 2:17Speaker 1: shove up. And oh my god. I have a feeling
- 2:22Speaker 1: that this is sort of a scenario where if you're
- 2:24Speaker 1: hiring somebody to cut your lawn, you should let the
- 2:27Speaker 1: experts handle it, and I'm the expert in that area.
- 2:29Speaker 1: You run a work over it, you don't dig it
- 2:37Speaker 1: up and put it in the back of your stupid truck.
- 2:41Speaker 1: You got pretty angry. You think you think I'm angry.
- 2:45Speaker 1: You shouldn't be upset because this is a very new technique. Technique.
- 2:50Speaker 1: Now are you talking about you? An ass idea? Okay, well,
- 2:54Speaker 1: people called the first guy they go into space, a
- 2:57Speaker 1: stupid idea. Oh my god, you're the grass height and
- 3:01Speaker 1: you're not some actual famous that you're supposed to drive
- 3:03Speaker 1: a lawn more across the grass. I suppose I'm the
- 3:07Speaker 1: astrophysicist of gardening because I'm venturing out where no man
- 3:11Speaker 1: has gone before. You're not, Oh my God. Sometimes to
- 3:14Speaker 1: be an innovator, you have to break the rules. Stop up,
- 3:19Speaker 1: get my grass out of your truck and put it
- 3:22Speaker 1: back on my lawn. Do you understand me? Well, it's
- 3:25Speaker 1: not actually a truck's Toyle crowl Oh, oh my god,
- 3:30Speaker 1: you realize you're fired. You never got to cut grass
- 3:34Speaker 1: on a couch again. I'm calling Mike. There is no
- 3:37Speaker 1: way you are done. Do you understand done? Do you
- 3:40Speaker 1: know how many times Steve Jobs was fired before you
- 3:42Speaker 1: create an apple? Quite a few. You just solidified yourself
- 3:45Speaker 1: as the biggest lawn on earth, even a bigger more
- 3:49Speaker 1: on than your husband. Jeff. Who are you talking about?
- 3:55Speaker 1: Because he set you up for this prank phone call?
- 3:56Speaker 1: Because this is actually Jewel from Brook and Jewel in
- 3:59Speaker 1: the morning doing a phone tap on you and your husband.
- 4:01Speaker 1: Jeff set you up. It's a joke. Oh my god,
- 4:06Speaker 1: I'm blood pressure like a crazy ass person. He sounded calm.
- 4:14Speaker 1: I'm very calm. Your husband told me that he wanted
- 4:16Speaker 1: to play a joke on you because you love your
- 4:18Speaker 1: lawn so much you would be upset. That was so ridiculous.
- 4:23Speaker 1: I can't even bully and you like, I'm gonna take
- 4:25Speaker 1: it to the sofa. I'm gonna cut it. It's corona.
- 4:30Speaker 1: If you if you really, if you really loved your lawn,
- 4:32Speaker 1: you would take it home and cut it on your couch.