Latest / The Rave Social Podcast / 42 How to Expand Your Capacity for Bliss & Play with Tay & Claire

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42 How to Expand Your Capacity for Bliss & Play with Tay & Claire · The Rave Social Podcast

• 0:13
  SPEAKER_02: Awesome! Hello everyone, and welcome back to the Rave Social podcast.
• 0:18
  SPEAKER_02: I'm your host, Jaden, and today we have Claire and Tay, who are both my breathwork facilitators.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_02: We had Claire on a couple weeks ago, so you're familiar with her.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_02: But I'm gonna have Tay introduce herself a little bit, give Claire a little recap on what she's up to, and then um we're gonna dive into our super awesome topic for the day, which is how to have more fun.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_02: So, Tay, why don't you tell us a little bit about you?
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_00: Yay.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: Well, Jayden, thank you so much for having me on.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_00: I haven't done a podcast in years, so I'm super stoked to be here.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just such a sweet little way to complete open virtual and um yeah, just share everything that Claire and I are doing collectively.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_00: So, hmm.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: I was a bit of a black sheep growing up, and I think I, for a lot of my childhood, I spent a lot of time trying to fit in to receive love and validation and appreciation from peers or authority figures or whatever it was.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_00: And there was a point in my journey where I decided to feel safe in what I actually wanted and allowed myself to want those things.
• 1:42
  SPEAKER_00: And for example, growing up in high school, everyone was drinking and partying and going out.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_00: And that choice point for me was deciding I actually don't want to spend my time doing this.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_00: I want to spend my time traveling across the world and going to yoga trainings and for a week and being trained by world-renowned um yoga facilitators and leadership facilitators.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: And so when I was 14, that's exactly what I did.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_00: I kind of hit like a rock bottom point in my high school experience.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I was skipping the week of the SAT and the ACT to go to these trainings and to stay on like Princeton graduates' couches just to attend these yoga trainings and um afford my experience there.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_00: And so I kind of just became a training junkie from 14 on.
• 2:38
  SPEAKER_00: And so for the last over 10 years, I've been immersing myself in different mentorship and facilitation programs around leadership and yoga and somatics, and Claire was actually the one that introduced me into therapeutic breathwork.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_00: And this was at a time when it felt like my whole world was collapsing in on me, and Claire offered me a free breath work journey, and I had no idea what I was getting myself into.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: And it was right before my dad passed, and what it reminded me of the innate intelligence within my body.
• 3:23
  SPEAKER_00: I remember the experience as something that was like I already knew everything that my body and my intuition was communicating to me, but I didn't have the space and the tools and the structure to be able to allow for that direct connection both with my body and with higher intelligence.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: And that was the first session where I really got access to that.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: And it felt like everything I cognitively knew began to actually land in my body, which was such a powerful feeling.
• 3:54
  SPEAKER_00: And I'd been doing light somatics and things like that, and doing um somatic trainings a few years prior to that.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but it didn't touch the experience that I had with Claire, and then I continued to have as I pursued therapeutic breathwork journeys.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think it was about after a year where I really decided to pursue this because I'm all about service and um really like serving my community to a higher capacity.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_00: And so I knew that what I was doing at the time was leadership coaching and somatic coaching.
• 4:33
  SPEAKER_00: Um it was the direction that I wanted to move in, but it wasn't it.
• 4:38
  SPEAKER_00: And it felt like 80% of what I wanted out of um like my life experience and my dharmic path, but it that 20% was missing.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_00: And so I did the Awaken Facilitator training, the same training that Claire attended, and it rocked my world.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I'm really excited to chat about um intuition, Jaden.
• 5:07
  SPEAKER_00: I know that's something that we've talked a lot about in our work together is tapping into intuition.
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_00: And for me, that was like the greatest unlock through all this work is not having to outsource those answers.
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_00: And I even sometimes still catch myself going into that pattern of wanting to ask other people for things that I already know, and then it's I come back into the remembrance of like, I already know everything that I'm asking for.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_00: Um, and we just have to create the space for that.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_00: So that's kind of my informal story background vibe.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, I love that so much.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_02: And uh, I don't even know that I've heard all of like your full journey.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I didn't know um how young you were when you like started on this path to healing and somatics and all of that.
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_02: So that's really fun to hear.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_02: And we're so excited to have you on today.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: And fun fact, it actually started because I overdosed on Edibles at a school field trip.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: And oh no, yeah, and my mom told me the only thing that you're allowed to do is go to yoga.
• 6:20
  SPEAKER_02: And oh because anytime of the year, people's like experiences in high school, I'm like, we are so different.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_02: I was raised in like the most religious area of the state of Utah.
• 6:35
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I didn't know people were doing drugs.
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_02: I didn't even know where to get alcohol.
• 6:41
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I didn't even know people were doing that.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_02: So it's just funny to hear at such a young age.
• 6:47
  SPEAKER_00: I can't imagine that would be down.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: So my mom was basically like the only place you're allowed to go is yoga.
• 6:55
  SPEAKER_00: And being the social butterfly that I was, I went to the 5 a.m.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: classes, the 5 p.m.
• 7:00
  SPEAKER_00: classes, the 7 p.m.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: classes, and I worked there as well.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_00: So it was out of rebellion totally, but ultimately, shout up, mom.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: When I look back at that decision, that decision changed the course of my entire life.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: I literally have no idea where I would be if it wasn't for that decision.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sure it'd be a similar path that I'm on now, but I think that was really the catalyst to just putting rocket fuel on what my soul was already craving.
• 7:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 7:34
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, so I love fun fact so much.
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_02: Um thank you for sharing that with us.
• 7:41
  SPEAKER_02: And Claire, do you want to share a little bit too?
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I think the thing that I would love to open with, just based off what Tay shared, is the different um like archetypes that we're coming to the table with.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel like maybe I'm somewhere in the middle of Tay and you growing up.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_01: Like Tay was wild child.
• 8:05
  SPEAKER_01: Like I was dying.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_01: I was just voice outing Tay the other day, and I described her younger her inner child as like really wild and free.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: And when I think of myself, like I was not that way.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_01: I was like always scanning how can I adjust myself to be perceived as good?
• 8:27
  SPEAKER_01: How can I be small and nice and like just be the good girl, you know?
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_01: And being really mindful not to do so in that like um distorted, rebellious way, where it's coming from that, like, well, fuck the system, fuck you, kind of energy.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be a bad bitch.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna be a boss, you know.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_01: That's not that's not the vibe.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and for Tay, it's been like this journey of that being kind of her essence, and then going through a really traumatic period in her life where she lost that essence, and her system was so burdened and overloaded that it didn't feel safe for that essence to be online and then like relearning how to come back into that.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_01: So it's just cool to have that dynamic and get to learn from each other's like true essence.
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, it's so it's so fun and it's so interesting.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_02: And yeah, I do feel like all of us have a different kind of experience along the way, which is awesome.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_02: It just adds to it.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, for sure.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_02: Do you do you want to add anything to that, or do you want to tell us a little bit about open and what you guys have coming?
• 9:54
  SPEAKER_01: Totally.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: So for anyone who doesn't know me and Tay, we started off as friends and have since come together.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: And for the past year and a half-ish, we've been collaborating on certain offers like immersions.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_01: We've got a virtual program that you went through.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_01: And we've got like two, three other things we're creating this year.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_01: It's kind of crazy, but um, it's called the opening.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_01: So we started with immersions and have since been like realizing we started with the most complex thing we could possibly think of, which is like these really deep therapeutic experiences, and have since been have since been getting hyper clear on the actual path that is required to get to that state that women like really crave, like being deeply in the feminine, really connected to intuition, being playful, expressed, magnetic, alive in your power.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_01: And through our own journeys, first of all, but also through working with a lot of women now who have very similar life experiences.
• 11:16
  SPEAKER_01: What we've realized is that similar to the Maslow's hierarchy of needs, like we all know the Maslow's hierarchy of needs, we have developed what we call the opening path.
• 11:25
  SPEAKER_01: So you can think of like a triangle and kind of like ascending up and down this hierarchy.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_01: And the reason I want to preframe this is I think it'll be really helpful context for the conversation we get into today around playfulness and intuition and all those things.
• 11:43
  SPEAKER_01: But when you think of this hierarchy, most people want to skip from like, I'm feeling overwhelmed, or maybe I'm feeling disconnected and uninspired, to being like, I want to be magnetic and manifest my dreams and connect my intuition, blah, blah, blah.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_01: But there's this whole journey that's actually required to be ascended through in a very specific order in order for that to be natural rather than forced or coming out in a distorted way.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: So, what that looks like is the baseline is obviously your physiological needs, being hydrated, being nourished, moving your body, getting sunlight, all the things.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: But then there's some elements that people tend to overlook or maybe underestimate the importance, or maybe think that they're not in a state of survival when their body actually unconsciously really is.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_01: And so the second tier on that hierarchy of the opening path is actually safety.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_01: Like, do you feel extremely burdened?
• 12:54
  SPEAKER_01: Is your body in an overactive state of survival?
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_01: Are you like picking at your nails all the time?
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_01: Are you like clenching your jaw all the time?
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_01: Are you like kind of hyper-vigilant, like always looking for something that's gonna go wrong?
• 13:09
  SPEAKER_01: So the second tier of that is safety, which we work with the nervous system, we work with basically somatics 101, healing overactive survival responses.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_01: And then from there, we've got tier three, which is individualization.
• 13:26
  SPEAKER_01: So we worked a lot with this in open virtual with y'all, where you start to get into repatterning the templates and the unconscious um belief structures that you inherited from mom, from dad, from family, from friends, from community, and come back to what your actual like true nature is when you untangle all of that.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_01: And then we've got tier four out of five, which is power.
• 13:59
  SPEAKER_01: So kind of funny.
• 14:01
  SPEAKER_01: A lot of women think like femininity might come first before being like your true power, but what we've actually realized is that your power as a woman is the doorway into your femininity, like your power creates that structure and that containment for your feminine essence to just relax and be in full receivership of like life itself.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_01: And there's so many ways, like we did three full calls on power alone and open virtual, right?
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_01: So you know what it's all about, but there's so many ways to rewrite safety in your nervous system to take up space, especially if you come from a good girl archetype.
• 14:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_01: And from there, the final tier is love and creation.
• 14:50
  SPEAKER_01: And that's what we're gonna get into today: playfulness, bliss vibes, intuition, all the things.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, I love that, and thank you for sharing that foundation because I do feel like this is just such a common theme.
• 15:03
  SPEAKER_02: I think kind of some of it stems from social media, people learning more about the masculine and feminine, but not fully understanding what that means.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_02: And so they see people maybe posts like, oh, like in my flow era, like want to be in my feminine, like all these things, and like reading that and seeing that, like it does feel good, and like you want that, but knowing the the actual like steps and work that it takes to get there is really important, or else like you're just gonna be frustrated that you're not just in your feminine, like you're just gonna be like, but why can't I just be in my flow?
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_02: And it's because there's all this this groundwork that goes into it.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_02: And I loved that part of open um virtual where we went through all those different processes of diving into the masculine, diving into the feminine, and really looking what are the subconscious like beliefs and and maybe blockages that we have that we don't consciously know about, and then how can we address those in a safe place so that we can move on from that and finally reach like power and love.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_01: Um and the best part about all of that is it wasn't just us telling you what to do.
• 16:22
  SPEAKER_01: Like you got to go into therapeutic breathwork for an hour every week and discover that for yourself.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 16:31
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and one other thing I wanted to mention, and then we'll I'll let you guys take over and kind of talk about um what it means to have more fun and how to get there and how to be in that space more often.
• 16:42
  SPEAKER_02: But um, I felt that this story was fitting.
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_02: So I just recently did a womb somatics session with um a friend of mine, and it was very similar.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_02: We were kind of looking at like the masculine and the feminine, and I was saying, you know, like I get so frustrated looking at the masculine because I feel like everything there is just messy and distort, and I'm just confused and it's muddy.
• 17:06
  SPEAKER_02: And but I want to be a mother and I want to, you know, do these things that are more feminine, right?
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_02: And it was just funny because she said a very similar thing, and that somatic session was very similar in the sense of like you have to have that power or that container for the feminine.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: Like, in order to be in your feminine, there is that masculine.
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_02: You don't just get one without the other.
• 17:33
  SPEAKER_02: And like having that container and that safety like allows you to really be in your feminine, be in flow, and reach these other levels of happiness and joy.
• 17:43
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that's just an important thing to remember is that you're not just gonna like get to a place where it's only feminine, like you have to have the masculine there for the feminine to do what it wants to do.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, yeah.
• 18:00
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's so easy to forget how important what you just said is when it comes to our own internal world and our own internal dynamics of the masculine and feminine.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you're listening to this right now, think about the last time you felt incredibly safe and protected by a man or by a woman, maybe.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_00: And think about the energy that they embodied in that moment in order for you to feel safe and physiologically relax into your body.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_00: There's probably qualities of presence, containment, structure, while also weaving in unconditional love through that process as well.
• 18:54
  SPEAKER_00: And the woman we work with is often a very high-performing woman who learned to be that way because she wanted or she learned that performing, accomplishing, achieving was the access point into receiving love validation from whoever.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_00: And through that process, the feminine often gets exiled.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_00: And so, what do I need often gets exiled?
• 19:22
  SPEAKER_00: What do I need in this moment right now?
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_00: Because it contradicts the identity that they've created of performance and achieving and accomplishing a goal or whatever that is.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_00: And so Claire and I like to call this the pendulum effect, where you go, you're conditioned to be in your masculine, and then it's like, well, that doesn't feel good.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_00: And then you start healing and you start recognizing how much pain that's actually caused you by being guarded and being in the distorted masculine, and then you swing all the way to the other side of wanting to be in your feminine and your flow, which isn't a bad thing.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: It can really serve as this period of reclamation for women who have never been able to experience that before.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: But the problem with that pendulum swinging is that if you're wanting to move into the feminine from a place of exiling the masculine, it's not authentic.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: But if you move into the feminine from a place of neutralizing the distorted ways of being, masculine ways of being within yourself, and then you move into the feminine, that's authentic and embodied.
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_00: And that's ultimately where we like to guide the women that come into our containers because it's not about exiling the masculine, it's about integrating it in a healthy way, and for everyone, that's gonna look so different.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, I love that.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_02: Claire, do you have anything to add?
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_01: No, I just it's I was actually just thinking about how this is Tay's and my first ever podcast together, which is kind of insane given how many hours we can spend on Zoom.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_01: But I love I love like hearing the way that Tay describes things, and then I have my own little mini light bulb moments, so that's that's what I'm doing over here.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_02: Um so when it comes to you know having more fun and feeling, I guess for me, like having more fun comes with a feeling of more freedom, like it's playfulness, it's it's not stress, it's just like freedom, playing in the grass, whatever.
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_02: Having more fun, how do how does the mess masculine and the feminine support that?
• 21:52
  SPEAKER_02: And how can people work towards that?
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'll chime in here and I think it just depends what your goals are.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_01: And even in listening to you talk before, Jaden, about motherhood, and you described that as being more feminine.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_01: And people might describe like playfulness being more feminine.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: But actually, when you think of like a really good mom, there's a lot of if you're talking true, authentic, um, healthy masculine energy, like a good mother has a lot of that in her because she creates containment and leadership and direction for her child.
• 22:35
  SPEAKER_01: For example, um kids who grow up to be in a dominant fight response and to be very assertive, aggressive, dominant in a space, they grow up to take on that distorted masculine expression because most often they didn't have that healthy masculine energy embodied in their parents growing up.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_01: And so their nervous system and their unconscious mind decided, oh, there's no leader here.
• 23:10
  SPEAKER_01: I guess it has to be me.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_01: And so they go out the rest of their life, unless they take steps to actively like look at this and repattern it for themselves, to assert that leadership and that like uh wounded way, and from a place of, oh, I have to do this because I learned it wasn't safe if I don't.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_01: And so I just wanted to like pause and share that because if we're talking about like masculine and feminine, it's important to share like how they actually coexist and how they create harmony.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_01: So when we get into playfulness, I was thinking of this earlier, and Tay, like, feel free to discern what you want to share and what you don't, but you've been on a really fucking powerful journey over the past few years of reclaiming your playfulness.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_01: And I feel like there might be some gems in that, but let me know what you're feeling.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: Survival is the number one cock blocker to playfulness.
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_00: When you're locked up, when you're guarded, when you're trying to protect yourself from a threat, there's no room for it.
• 24:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I spent several years being fully in this state.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_00: And to the point where I was overburdened with responsibility, with emotion, with trauma.
• 25:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I had a lot of damn tools at that time when I had these experiences, and even those didn't sustain me through the intensity of this time.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: And it's a very interesting experience.
• 25:18
  SPEAKER_00: It was a very interesting experience to deeply know my essence, who I was, like the like when I every time I sit down in meditation, I think I was talking to you guys about this on the last call of Open Virtual.
• 25:34
  SPEAKER_00: When I sit down in meditation and I connect with the self that exists beyond my conditioning, I always see this vision of me hooping and playing and dancing and like moving my body in fully expressed ways.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: And before my sexy back for your family.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, like that's my essence.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: And it was a very interesting experience for me to move through these really traumatic experiences that shut my system down, and to feel myself moving farther and farther away from who I knew myself to be.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_00: And knowing that I had high expectations for how I lead and how I show up for myself and how I show up for my clients, it was so confusing and deeply frustrating and overwhelming to think about the process of coming back into that state of play.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: And when I speak about about this too, I also think about some of our clients who it's not um it's not anger or sadness that are the most challenging emotions to feel.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: It's actually bliss that is the most challenging emotion for them to feel, the most vulnerable emotion for them to feel.
• 27:05
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like you you can continue, sorry, sorry.
• 27:09
  SPEAKER_02: But I feel like that's why people in like our society turn so much to like substance because like different substances, because like it's it's an easy way, in quotes, like easy way to access those states when in reality, like it's not.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_02: But I I think that's kind of why we see people do that because that it's so much harder to feel that way.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, absolutely.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_00: And when I think about bliss in relationship to maybe some how some of our clients perceive bliss, I can completely understand from my own personal experience how vulnerable and threatening bliss sometimes feels, because what that means is that something else that is not bliss can penetrate that frequency.
• 28:02
  SPEAKER_00: And that's the scariest part about it, at least in my experience.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_00: And so my journey with it the last few years, uh, like Claire was sharing, is I have this very like wild free essence and going through acute traumatic experiences that shut my system down.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_00: And the last, I would say, three years has really been about going into deep therapeutic spaces in order to access the wisdom of my soul self to inform my human self, to support me in accessing the guidance that my human self that's in survival, that's blocked, that's closed off, that's protective, can literally not access.
• 28:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I was thinking about it today, just as we were preparing, just as I was thinking about, you know, the things that we might talk about on this podcast.
• 29:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I was thinking about my own journey with deep therapeutic work, and the thing that got me out of survival and gave me access to these deeper states of bliss was deep therapeutic work.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_00: Whether that was sitting in meditation for an hour, whether that was going into a deep therapeutic breath work journey, whether that was hypnosis or plant medicine, going into these states where I can touch the feeling of what it feels like to feel safe and being open and playful and loving and um and tapped into the frequency of bliss and then come back into my human self and knowing that that is something that is always available within me, and uh my human self gets to practice to learn how to feel safe in that too.
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what's coming up.
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like a kind of a story for people who aren't as familiar with um like what we're talking about.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like an example that's coming to mind is like I read an article at some point that said like most people when they go on vacation, it takes them like two to three days to even fully disconnect.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_02: And then usually, like, that's how long, you know, if you're on a weekend trip, like that's how long a weekend trip is, then you just come right back.
• 30:37
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and it's making me think of this exact situation, and it's because I think when somebody who's not maybe doesn't have all the same tools goes on vacation, it's hard to drop in and and get out of survival mode and get into play mode because they have to go through this whole process subconsciously, like obviously they don't know they're doing it before they can enjoy themselves.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_02: So that's a that's a kind of story that comes to my mind, and then it presents this question to you, uh both of you.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_02: What, you know, where should people start if if they're feeling this, like, I want to play, I want to have more fun, but I can't, or it doesn't feel like I can access that.
• 31:22
  SPEAKER_02: Like, where should they go?
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_02: Where should they start?
• 31:27
  SPEAKER_01: I would start by asking the question, where do you feel overburdened?
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what's causing you to feel like you can't play, or what's what's the block?
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_01: Because most people who have a lot on their plate, there's always at least like one loop that can get closed, right?
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like when you think about open loops, it's like I've got this thing to return, I've got maybe kids to run errands to, I've got all these like open loose end work projects where I sit down and it's like, fuck, what do I even start on first?
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_01: Because like there's 10 different things that I could start on, and I already know sitting at my desk that I'm gonna get to the end of the day and not have all these things completed.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_01: So it's like this imminent um this imminent reminder of like I'm not good enough, I don't have enough time, and play is not the priority.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_01: So I think there's like, first of all, this deep belief that on a collective level, like we need to shift in how productive play actually is.
• 32:42
  SPEAKER_01: When you think of play, like, what do you think about?
• 32:45
  SPEAKER_01: I think about being open, I think about being curious, and the word aliveness comes to mind too.
• 32:53
  SPEAKER_01: And when you think about being fully alive, a lot of people, the first thing they think of, they don't even realize they're thinking about this, but their brain will first go to like additional input.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_01: Like think about a concert, think about a vacation.
• 33:09
  SPEAKER_01: It's like shifting the environment and kind of adding stimulus so that things are more colorful, more vibrant.
• 33:17
  SPEAKER_01: Um like the fun is more of an external input.
• 33:24
  SPEAKER_01: When when you actually think about real authentic playfulness and aliveness, the real definition of that in my book is resensitizing yourself to the stimulus that's already here.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_02: So are you saying like maybe play is just looking outside and noticing how beautiful the trees are and that the sky is blue and it's sunny today, or maybe that it's cloudy today because it's cloudy here.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_02: Um are you saying it's it's like as simple as that?
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_01: Or as a starting point, yes.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_01: As a starting point in um, like in our breathwork journeys, for example, we'll most of the time start by resensitizing you to what does it feel like to notice your breath as it moves in and out through your nose, filling your lungs, filling your diaphragm, filling your belly, what does the ground beneath you feel like, what do the clothes on your skin feel like?
• 34:31
  SPEAKER_01: What does the air on your skin feel like?
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_01: And then as we ramp up through that journey experience, we start to shift into more stimulus with maybe touch or tapping or vocal toning.
• 34:47
  SPEAKER_01: And for a lot of women, um the instinct might be to work with intensity with those tools or maybe speed.
• 35:03
  SPEAKER_01: But for a lot for a lot of women, what they actually need is like to go very slowly with themselves and notice what that feels like to actually slow their nervous system down.
• 35:15
  SPEAKER_01: And then through that process of like resensitizing their bodies to just like being open and curious and soft and nurturing with themselves, there's so much like life force that opens up through that process that gets to be like playful and fun.
• 35:37
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I love that.
• 35:39
  SPEAKER_00: Something that I want to speak to here is something, a framework that we're gonna be bringing into our new program, Open Foundations.
• 35:45
  SPEAKER_00: And it just this conversation made me think about it.
• 35:48
  SPEAKER_00: And it's the DAD framework.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, I'm scared.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_00: We were trying to think of an acronym to make it easily accessible.
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_00: And for those of us that have more visual brains, I know that when I have a word, I remember things so much easier.
• 36:09
  SPEAKER_00: So the D and DAD stands for deep therapeutic work.
• 36:13
  SPEAKER_00: And this is in the context of accessing more joy, accessing that like essentially the archetype that Claire was describing in the very beginning of this podcast of the kind of feeling and life that most of our clients truly want to create for themselves, both internally and externally, and tapping into that femininity, feeling fulfilled, feeling tapped into their purpose.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_00: This is a framework for that.
• 36:45
  SPEAKER_00: So the D and DAD stands for deep therapeutic work.
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I already shared my experience with deep therapeutic work and how powerful that can be for accessing these higher states of bliss, because when your human self is in survival and locked up, the deep therapeutic work going into an expanded state of consciousness can serve as a way to access wisdom beyond that survival state.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_00: And then when you come back into your human self, then to integrate those insights.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_00: So D and Dad is deep therapeutic work, and then A is aligned action, and something that is I would say pretty neglected in the deep therapeutic space, whether that be with plant medicine or breath work, is the power of integration.
• 37:38
  SPEAKER_00: And the way that Claire and I structure our offerings is we want the integration to be an extension and an expansion of the journey itself.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_00: And what I mean by that is you can be in a therapeutic breathwork journey.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_00: And like Claire was speaking to, maybe notice yourself getting overwhelmed with sensation and maybe expanding your capacity for sensation that's happening in the moment.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_00: And that experience might be a direct mirror to how you relate with sensation when you are in that stress response outside of the breathwork journey in your human self.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_00: And what's dope about being in an expanded state of consciousness is that you get to relate with it differently than your human self might.
• 38:36
  SPEAKER_00: If you were in the grocery store and someone said something rude to you, or like whatever happens during our day, that like creates that activating moment is in the expanded state of consciousness, you get to experience what it feels like to face whatever you're facing from the lens of love and neutrality, at least an expanded state of what you might experience in normal waking life.
• 39:05
  SPEAKER_00: And when we support our clients with integration, it's like, okay, you had this experience.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_00: What did you get out of it?
• 39:15
  SPEAKER_00: And what did you learn from it?
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_00: And then how does that actually show up in your day-to-day waking life?
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_00: And how could you integrate the exact framework that you worked with in the breathwork journey into your daily life?
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_00: So the next time that they get activated in a conversation with their partner, it's like they start maybe noticing themselves going into the default response.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_00: And then their body remembers, oh, I actually know how to work with this.
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_00: I know how to create capacity, more capacity for these sensations and expand my capacity to feel them.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe the answer is saying, hey, I'm actually feeling really overwhelmed right now, and I need to go upstairs and create space for myself.
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_00: So that's kind of a macrocosm of the microcosm or microcosm of the macrocosm example of what aligned action can look like in the context of deep therapeutic work.
• 40:13
  SPEAKER_00: And then the lastie is your daily practices.
• 40:18
  SPEAKER_00: And this is something that a lot of high performers struggle with is creating space for their daily practices.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_00: And what's interesting about this model or this framework is how unbalanced you can feel if any one of those three are unbalanced, I guess.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_00: So if you're doing the deep therapeutic work and you're doing the aligned action, but you're not doing your daily practices, then you'll probably get to the end of the week and be like, oh shit, there's a lot of built-up energy in my body.
• 40:56
  SPEAKER_00: And you actually end up using the deep therapeutic space to clear that energy and process that stuck energy, versus if you were doing the daily practices every day in between the deep therapeutic work, then what you can access in the deep therapeutic work is your intuition, is your femininity, is your power, is your play, is all these expansive things.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_00: And kind of moving into a different example of that, if you're only doing your daily practices and you're not taking aligned action or doing deep therapeutic work, then what you're gonna notice is the unconscious or the subconscious is the primary thing that's guiding your emotions, your thoughts, your actions, and your environment.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_00: And damn, that's a that's a sticky, sticky place to be in here.
• 41:53
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 41:54
  SPEAKER_00: It's honestly what most of humanity lives in, which is why Claire and I's mission is to bring deep therapeutic work to the masses and support humanity and being able to have access to the kind of state that allows you to take a line to action, to trust your intuition, to feel more playful because the body has its own priorities and needs to work through the tension, or often needs to work through the tension and the burdens before it accesses the play.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_00: And that doesn't mean you have to be like fully healed before you step into your state of play.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_00: There's so much nuance to this conversation, but I think that's a really good structure for people to look at because sometimes we can move through our lives and be like, something feels really off, and I feel like I'm missing something, but I don't know what I'm missing.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_00: And for the high performers, I know that for myself, when something feels off, there's this subconscious part of me that's like, what can I do to solve it?
• 43:05
  SPEAKER_00: What can I do to solve it?
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_00: And my thought energy goes towards that all the time.
• 43:10
  SPEAKER_00: But this framework just makes it really simple.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, what what part, which piece needs to come into greater balance?
• 43:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I think that's a really good starting point.
• 43:20
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, I love the framework, and it also kind of brought up just like some thoughts for me around.
• 43:30
  SPEAKER_02: I think manifesting is something that people associate with having more fun and love and joy.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_02: And I think part of that is because these are all high vibrational frequencies that you're resonating with in the world.
• 43:44
  SPEAKER_02: You know, if you're operating from love, you're operating from a higher frequency, you're going to attract those higher frequencies of things that you want, right?
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_02: Whatever that is money, a partner, anything.
• 43:56
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I think that it all goes together.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that's kind of the part, at least for me, that can be frustrating when you're not getting what you want in life or you're not having as much fun or you're not feeling these um high vibrational frequencies, you're just like frustrated.
• 44:14
  SPEAKER_02: But it's a whole pattern of bringing your subconscious to your conscious mind and blending those two things together so that you can reprogram your subconscious mind to naturally want to operate from that place of love.
• 44:30
  SPEAKER_02: And one thing that made me think of that too is what you're saying, like you're in your head a lot.
• 44:36
  SPEAKER_02: And another kind of example of that that I've worked with with other coaches is like that's your monkey brain, and like your monkey brain wants to solve problems because that's that's how we evolved, you know.
• 44:48
  SPEAKER_02: It was very problem-oriented, but like in the world that we live in now, you actually can just really access your heart more than your mind, and your heart is oftentimes a lot more intelligent than your monkey brain brain is, you know.
• 45:07
  SPEAKER_01: I love that you brought in the heart, and I love that specifically because there's kind of like two different archetypes of women that were coming to mind throughout this whole conversation, and one is the archetype of the woman who actually is quite playful, but it's in a sneaky coping mechanism way where there's actually pain underneath that, or maybe um gosh, it could be as simple as like hard conversations that need to be had, but the avoidance of what needs to happen for her alignment and her evolution of self, like either the avoidance or the anxiety around that comes out in this like skewed playfulness to kind of like dance around it.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_01: And I know women, I know Tay and I both worked with clients where that's been kind of this thing that comes up is like when we start getting close to the root of the thing that's like actually the thing we need to talk about.
• 46:11
  SPEAKER_01: It's like let's crack jokes, let's you know, kind of like anything to get away from it.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_01: So sometimes that is something that needs to be looked at is like, are you wanting to access more play because it's actually just like exiling the pain that's underneath that you're trying to like sneak around?
• 46:33
  SPEAKER_01: And then the other thing that comes up is looping back to um like if your body's unconsciously in survival, that's the thing that's gonna be the biggest block to playfulness.
• 46:47
  SPEAKER_01: And I just think of like relationship dynamics are such a great example for this.
• 46:54
  SPEAKER_01: Like, if you if your nervous system is filled to the brim with you can think of it as like static, like all those built-up moments where energy like needed to discharge, but you didn't, and you kept your composure and you put on a smile and you said everything's fine, and you held it all in when you what actually would have been healthier for your nervous system is to maybe tap or pound or hum or shake and just at least discharge that physical energy in your body, then what will happen is it's gonna come out in your relationship, it's gonna come out in passive aggressive comments, it's gonna come out in just like being a downer and being a bummer when cognitively you can like almost watch yourself third person being like, why did I say that?
• 47:50
  SPEAKER_01: Or like, why did I react that way?
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_01: Or like, God, that was dumb, or that just caused conflict, that was unnecessary, but now I kind of need to uphold like being right in this scenario.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_01: So now I'm gonna double down.
• 48:03
  SPEAKER_01: And that's where we get ourselves into trouble when if you are just consciously and intentionally creating the space on a consistent basis to discharge that energy as it comes up using that exact like dad framework, which is so funny.
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_01: We literally just came up with that.
• 48:21
  SPEAKER_01: We're like, that'd be so good.
• 48:24
  SPEAKER_00: Honestly, it's so sweet too, because I feel like it's my dad just being like, you know what, I'm gonna help y'all with this one, and it is like it's funny because it's also like the structure of the container, like it just makes sense.
• 48:42
  SPEAKER_01: A little help from the heavens taste so sweet.
• 48:48
  SPEAKER_00: And I think what we're really talking about here is to another balance to create when we're wanting to create more bliss is the balance between bliss and healing.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you're spending too much time or energy in the free or too much is subjective, but if you're spending excess energy or excess time, energy in the frequency of bliss um in that distorted way, like Claire was speaking to, then the subconscious takes over and starts to direct and inform all of your decisions and thoughts and experiences.
• 49:35
  SPEAKER_00: And if you get too trapped in the healing loop, then bliss gets on the back burner.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_00: And so ultimately, what we want in order to create deep, long-lasting healing is to expand our capacity for healthy stress and expand our capacity for healthy bliss.
• 49:55
  SPEAKER_00: And that's what we get to do in open virtual and just honestly in across the opening path, which is such a gift to be able to support women in accessing.
• 50:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I also just want to level with the audience here, like Claire and I were our first clients, and we are always our primary clients.
• 50:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I thought it might be fun to just share a few concrete examples of what like Claire shared a lot about the conceptual nature of kind of balancing the bliss and the heal and the healing, but there were a few examples that came to my mind, and the first one was I remember when one of my OG clients, we've been working together for like three years, and she's just so devoted to this work.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember when she was just starting to grasp the importance of energy flow in the body and how important allowing stagnant, stuck, dormant energy in your body to flow was one of the most important pillars of healing and creating transformation in your life.
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_00: And we were on an integration call from one of our journeys, and she was like, So something happened in the parking lot of Trader Joe's, and I was just about to walk in to get something that I needed, and I got sent into a full-blown stress response.
• 51:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I pressed it down, I walked into Trader Joe's, I got back in my car, and then I went about my day.
• 51:52
  SPEAKER_00: And we just had this open conversation about it, and I was just asking her curious questions about the impact and what she's noticing now in her body, and if there are any points of tension that she's noticing.
• 52:06
  SPEAKER_00: And we kind of began to go into this somatic process, and she began to locate where by sensitizing herself to the experience or the uh sensations that were in her body, she started to locate where that anger was actually storing itself in her body.
• 52:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I told her, just because you put it aside and push it down doesn't mean that it's not there.
• 52:35
  SPEAKER_00: Because when you push it down, it actually becomes the thing that directs the way that you speak, the way that you relate with your daughter, the way that you move in the world, the way that you teach your classes, because she was in the she's in the fitness industry.
• 52:50
  SPEAKER_00: And so we started to I started to guide her through an experience of what it feels like to, you know, there are some times where you're out in public or you're at an event or you're doing something and you get activated by something.
• 53:08
  SPEAKER_00: And there are those moments where it's necessary to kind of shelf it, but what most people don't do is they don't go back to the shelf.
• 53:16
  SPEAKER_00: And that's the most important part because otherwise you're just pushing it down, pushing it down, pushing it down, or stuffing it under the rug until there's a fucking mound on the on the rug, and you're just avoiding it, pretending that it's not there every day.
• 53:31
  SPEAKER_00: And so we created uh space for that feeling and that anger.
• 53:37
  SPEAKER_00: And after the fact, she felt so peaceful and so expansive and so tapped into um the frequency of bliss after.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_00: And that was when it clicked for her of how important it is to prioritize the energy flow in her body.
• 53:58
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you think about survival responses, whether you're going into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn, all of it is some sort of like fawn and freeze, or I'll just speak to them individually in the context of energy flow.
• 54:15
  SPEAKER_00: So fawn is often this experience of having a desire or wanting something, and to receive love and validation, we repress that desire in order to experience safety.
• 54:30
  SPEAKER_00: And with freeze, it's responsibility, responsibility, task, emails, texts, all the things, and we go into maybe this subtle state of avoidance.
• 54:45
  SPEAKER_00: And over time, those things build up and they build up and they build up, and we get into a state of overwhelm.
• 54:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't even know what I need, I don't know what I want, I don't know what to do first.
• 54:58
  SPEAKER_00: And um, and we're essentially just going through this process of restricting our energy flow until we literally cannot move and we don't know what to do and we don't know what we need.
• 55:09
  SPEAKER_00: And then fight is this like excess energy that's coming into our body, and flight is running away and creating that like avoidance of the threat instead of facing it, which would allow the energy to flow freely.
• 55:26
  SPEAKER_00: So that was one of the examples that came to my mind.
• 55:30
  SPEAKER_00: But Claire, if you have anything to add to that, go for it.
• 55:34
  SPEAKER_01: I actually did like five minutes ago, and then I was listening to you talk and I lost it.
• 55:40
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm sure it'll come back.
• 55:44
  SPEAKER_01: It'll come back.
• 55:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, no, I I feel like there's just so many other examples of this.
• 55:49
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I'm just basically trying to blend it with other things I know people like know about and see, but it's like I don't know if you've ever heard of the book like The Body Keep Score by Louise Hay, but it's very similar.
• 56:02
  SPEAKER_02: It's like any sort of like dis-ease in the body came from somewhere.
• 56:08
  SPEAKER_02: It's trapped energy, whether that's like from you in your life, whether that's generational, like it could not even be yours to carry, but you're carrying it, like that's what causes this ease in your body.
• 56:19
  SPEAKER_02: And so, yeah, it can be as small as making you like feel upset and dysregulated in a moment in your life, but it can also, you know, snowball into these larger problems that you have to face in your life.
• 56:34
  SPEAKER_02: Um, that's one thing I thought of, and then the other thing kind of came from the womb session I did a couple weeks ago, and we were just talking about how, like you're saying, it it doesn't, once it's in your body, like when the energy is in your body and it's stuck, like it doesn't go away ever until you decide that you want to um transmute or alchemize it into something new, you know, like energy is not created nor destroyed.
• 57:02
  SPEAKER_02: It's not like you're getting rid of it, it's that you're choosing to alchemize it into these higher states of consciousness, like love and bliss and power.
• 57:11
  SPEAKER_02: Um, and I just like for me personally, I think like how beautiful that you can take a frustrating situation in the Trader Joe's parking lot that maybe you didn't choose, like something just happened to you.
• 57:24
  SPEAKER_02: You can take that and you can alchemize it within your body and shift into a state of love.
• 57:32
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 57:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 57:34
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes it's not chosen.
• 57:36
  SPEAKER_00: Like sometimes it's not a conscious choice of moving the energy through the body, but the body finds a way to move the energy.
• 57:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um, my partner and I are actually experiencing this right now, just getting super candid here.
• 57:53
  SPEAKER_00: Um it's honestly pretty wild to experience, but for the last six months, my partner has been experiencing uh tremors and like shaking of his body when his parasympathetic nervous system gets activated.
• 58:13
  SPEAKER_00: So right before he goes to bed, or when he's kind of in this downregulated state.
• 58:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I've been helping him through this process of learning how to trust the somatic release that's happening in his body.
• 58:29
  SPEAKER_00: And Claire and I talk about a lot in our containers how our bodies naturally know how to come out of survival, but we, the human, get in the way, especially with how many distractions that we have in our modern world.
• 58:47
  SPEAKER_00: We have our phone, we have infinite distractions that we can fill up our brains with and distract ourselves from feeling.
• 58:55
  SPEAKER_00: But our bodies were literally made to be in a regulated state and also shift into a sympathetic, activated state when it's necessary.
• 59:08
  SPEAKER_00: But the problem with our modern society is that because we go to distraction or avoidance, or we just don't know how to deal with the energy that's occurring in our body, we block our innate intelligence.
• 59:21
  SPEAKER_00: And the way that Claire and I describe our innate intelligence is when a lion is wanting to hunt a gazelle, and the lion move towards, moves towards the gazelle to go kill it, and the gazelle, it's running for its life, it's going into flight.
• 59:39
  SPEAKER_00: And when the gazelle comes back into safety and realizes that the threat isn't there anymore, what it does is it will start to tremor and shake.
• 59:50
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's also stated in the body keeps the score as well.
• 59:54
  SPEAKER_00: That example, but it's such a powerful example of how nature and wild animals literally use somatics to process trauma.
• 1:00:07
  SPEAKER_00: Maybe they can't go through through a therapeutic breathwork journey, but maybe that'll be in a few years.
• 1:00:15
  SPEAKER_00: But it's like we get in the way of that, and all of the work that Claire and I are doing through the opening path is literally just supporting women and learning how to create space for that in their own lives and learning how to tap into that innate intelligence.
• 1:00:32
  SPEAKER_00: And what's interesting about my partner having this period for the last almost six months of somatic release is that a few months ago, I actually started to have something very similar.
• 1:00:44
  SPEAKER_00: Every time I would go into meditation or do a deep therapeutic breath work journey, I will start to tremor and shake.
• 1:00:50
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes it goes to the extent of my whole body is convulsing.
• 1:00:55
  SPEAKER_00: And it's a whole nother level of learning how to trust your body when you're lying down and your body is moving itself.
• 1:01:06
  SPEAKER_00: And there's this element of kind of consciously working with it and allowing the energy to move like a river is flowing.
• 1:01:16
  SPEAKER_00: You're not putting a dam on it, you're just allowing the river to flow in the direction that it needs to.
• 1:01:22
  SPEAKER_00: But it's a whole nother level, like people talk about surrender, it's a whole nother level of surrender to trusting the innate intelligence of your body.
• 1:01:30
  SPEAKER_00: But because I've built capacity in my system for sensation and emotion and experiences, I've had moments where I will be convulsing or tremoring, and this has been happening for me for the last 30 days, every single day, and I've gotten clear guidance to just create space for it.
• 1:01:53
  SPEAKER_00: Every day I create 30 minutes of space to just allow my body to do its thing.
• 1:01:58
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes my body just shakes, and then I get up and I go back to my normal day.
• 1:02:05
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes I'll end up shaking and being in the somatic release for however long.
• 1:02:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I will be lying there so fully tapped into the frequency of bliss and in a state of remembrance of oh, this is what it's supposed to feel like.
• 1:02:27
  SPEAKER_00: And I wouldn't have been able to tap into that if I didn't trust my body, if I didn't allow the energy to move.
• 1:02:33
  SPEAKER_00: And I think that's a really beautiful example of how discharging this energy can be the exact access point into the very frequency that we want to feel.
• 1:02:47
  SPEAKER_00: But discharging the energy is often the first thing that we avoid.
• 1:02:50
  SPEAKER_02: Yep.
• 1:02:52
  SPEAKER_02: I agree so much.
• 1:02:54
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I think we've all experienced this, but like I think you get angry or you see something that triggers you, or something happens, and you want to look at your phone.
• 1:03:08
  SPEAKER_02: Like you're like, where's TikTok?
• 1:03:10
  SPEAKER_02: Because you just don't want to get up and move like if you went for a walk, if you took a second to just tap in with yourself and and figure out, you know, why are you why do you want to respond this way and kind of move that energy would be so much better.
• 1:03:26
  SPEAKER_02: But TikTok, like it's in my pocket.
• 1:03:28
  SPEAKER_02: Of course, I just want to scroll and numb it until it goes away.
• 1:03:32
  SPEAKER_01: So I was thinking about you hooping.
• 1:03:35
  SPEAKER_01: So for anyone who doesn't know Tay, Tay loves to like, she loves to hoop, you know, with a literal hula hoop and just like toss it around and if you ever see her Instagram story, she's always like doing her hoop thing.
• 1:03:48
  SPEAKER_01: And for so many women who come from that like good girl, be nice, be sweet, be smart, be good archetype, you're probably really fucking locked up in your body.
• 1:04:04
  SPEAKER_01: Because I know I was, and I remember when I first started to like going to concerts and I would watch my friends dancing, and I'd be like, I just don't move that way.
• 1:04:16
  SPEAKER_01: Like my body doesn't have that button.
• 1:04:18
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I don't know what like how to even do that.
• 1:04:22
  SPEAKER_01: And that started becoming like an integrate an integration practice for me was how can I drop in with my breath and like the subtlest sensations in my body enough to quiet?
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_01: Because that's what like being really present with sensation in your body, what it does is it quiets that thinking mind.
• 1:04:42
  SPEAKER_01: That's like, oh, what do they think of me?
• 1:04:43
  SPEAKER_01: What do I look like right now?
• 1:04:45
  SPEAKER_01: Is this weird?
• 1:04:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um, am I being judged?
• 1:04:48
  SPEAKER_01: Like all that quiets when you're actually just really present with yourself.
• 1:04:52
  SPEAKER_01: And so that started becoming an integration practice for me, like going to concerts, and I don't give a fuck what's going on around me.
• 1:05:00
  SPEAKER_01: It's like I'm oftentimes when I'm on the dance floor, I'm like tapping my heart and I'm like directing my breath through my body, and I'm just like noticing all the sensations within me and just the frequency of that.
• 1:05:16
  SPEAKER_01: And that's when I started to unlock, like, oh, this is what it feels like to authentically dance and to be in this energy of just exploration with my body and playfulness.
• 1:05:28
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not saying it looks good or looks cool, like can't guarantee that, but the energy behind it's completely different.
• 1:05:38
  SPEAKER_01: So that's that is like using integration to sort of de-armor yourself and quiet that like thinking mind that's trying to avoid judgment.
• 1:05:49
  SPEAKER_01: When it comes to raising your standards, I'll keep this brief because I know we're wrapping up, but the thing I want to leave you with, dear listener, is coming back to I find it helpful to have like that greater reason for why I'm doing anything.
• 1:06:11
  SPEAKER_01: And I know that sometimes I can be pretty direct with making requests of my partner, like keeping the house cleaner, you know.
• 1:06:25
  SPEAKER_01: I am always encouraging him to be more dialed with his meditation practice and not being on the phone or like scrolling or like having business entrepreneur conversations at 11 p.m.
• 1:06:38
  SPEAKER_01: Because that happens a lot.
• 1:06:40
  SPEAKER_01: And if I'm making those requests of him, then I need to actually go first.
• 1:06:46
  SPEAKER_01: So that's something that I'm always keeping in mind is when no one's watching, like, how am I showing up for me?
• 1:06:53
  SPEAKER_01: And in the even greater picture, how is the daily habitual patterns that I'm building now going to shape the family that I create and the kind of mother that I am?
• 1:07:10
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm all for like moms are fucking superheroes.
• 1:07:14
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have kids yet, I don't truly know how hard it is.
• 1:07:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I also do believe that there is a higher standard that we can we can call parents up into moms and dads to like really step it up and model true health and happiness and regulation for their kids.
• 1:07:36
  SPEAKER_01: That's what we're all about.
• 1:07:38
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, I love that so much.
• 1:07:40
  SPEAKER_02: And thank you for adding both of those, both of those thoughts.
• 1:07:44
  SPEAKER_02: Those were beautiful.
• 1:07:47
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
• 1:07:48
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, I'm so grateful for both you, um, Tay and Claire for being on the podcast today and sharing your wealth of knowledge.
• 1:07:59
  SPEAKER_02: It's just incredible learning from you and being in your circle.
• 1:08:02
  SPEAKER_02: So I appreciate you both.
• 1:08:04
  SPEAKER_02: And if you're listening and you're curious about doing open virtual or the opening, which is the new one coming soon, do we have a date?
• 1:08:13
  SPEAKER_01: Open foundations is what it's gonna be called.
• 1:08:16
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:08:16
  SPEAKER_01: And we don't have a date yet, but sometime in the next month or so it's coming.
• 1:08:21
  SPEAKER_02: And the wait list for open virtual, is that open?
• 1:08:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah, we can get to the link.
• 1:08:28
  SPEAKER_02: We will put that wait list in here because if you feel like maybe this is calling to you, I would say go for it.
• 1:08:38
  SPEAKER_02: And yeah, thank you both so much.
• 1:08:40
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you, Janet.
• 1:08:42
  SPEAKER_02: We love you.
• 1:08:44
  SPEAKER_02: Okay, bye, I think.