Latest / Camp Classics / Batman & Robin (1997)

Transcript

Batman & Robin (1997) · Camp Classics

• 0:00
  Get away from her, you bitch. Classic.
• 0:05
  He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders
• 0:09
  right before she died. No, I thought.
• 0:16
  You become a prostitute or dog at it.
• 0:18
  I used to love doggy chow. I used to love doggy chow too,
• 0:24
  as I told Lady Freeze before I pulled her plug.
• 0:28
  This is a one woman podcast. I'm Crystal.
• 0:33
  I've never been good with competition.
• 0:36
  Who needs a frigid wife anyway? I'm baby lame.
• 0:40
  Who does need a frigid wife, exactly?
• 0:43
  And welcome to Camp Classics. A thoughtful podcast about
• 0:50
  stupid movies. Oh.
• 0:52
  My God, coming to you, live in person.
• 0:54
  Oh my God, I know. We're looking at each other
• 0:55
  really intensely. It's a bit too much.
• 0:58
  Isn't it eye contact is really. I think listeners might sense I
• 1:03
  might play Footsie with you and I might look, I'm gonna touch.
• 1:06
  I'm rubbing my foot against your leg there now.
• 1:08
  Wow, is that doing back to? Remote back to remote abort.
• 1:12
  It's intense, isn't it? Yeah.
• 1:14
  The other problem is you can't normally see what I'm doing when
• 1:16
  we zoom each other for these podcasts.
• 1:17
  Yeah, by design. Will that change your behaviour
• 1:21
  or increase? It depends where this goes.
• 1:25
  I feel really intense looking at you.
• 1:27
  I feel like I'm in basic into risk.
• 1:30
  Addiction right now, Yeah, when you think about fucking me.
• 1:36
  Yeah, that's it. And I know you do.
• 1:39
  How do you picture it, Doctor? Wow.
• 1:43
  OK, great. Well, I love.
• 1:44
  That for us and for the podcast. Me too.
• 1:47
  Me too. Every two weeks.
• 1:49
  What are we here doing? Well, we're we're discussing
• 1:52
  rating and reviewing some of the campus of Camp Classics.
• 1:54
  Yeah, I mean, it's as simple as that, really isn't.
• 1:56
  It it is. It is.
• 1:57
  Today we are covering 1997's Batman and Robin.
• 2:03
  It's a very imaginative title for a movie, isn't it?
• 2:07
  How did they come up with that? I know.
• 2:09
  Well, I was intrigued to see there was a meant to be another
• 2:12
  film that Joe. What was that one called?
• 2:13
  Batman Unchained, Yeah. Which I'm just like, that is so
• 2:17
  bondagey. I'm here for it.
• 2:18
  I know. I mean already you just, you
• 2:21
  can't really imagine the gayer version of this.
• 2:23
  And then you hear about Batman Unchained and you're like, well,
• 2:27
  I'm erect. I'm erect.
• 2:30
  Why aren't you erect? But before we start, we've got a
• 2:32
  bit of business to get through. We've got a couple new Gatreon
• 2:36
  members. Jesus loves winners.
• 2:39
  Of course we have, yes. What episode do you think it was
• 2:42
  that I was going to? Say so.
• 2:44
  Give it up for Kate and Arthur, who were clearly so aroused by
• 2:49
  the thought of us discussing Masters of the Universe that
• 2:52
  they decided to give us £4 a month.
• 2:53
  So yes, thank you Kate and Arthur.
• 2:57
  And you know what? They were correct.
• 2:59
  It's a horny episode. It's Dolph Lundgren.
• 3:02
  It's fisting jokes. Is it our?
• 3:04
  And it's Courtney Cox is. It our horniest episode yet.
• 3:07
  I'm not sure it is our horniest one.
• 3:08
  No. What did you say the horniest
• 3:09
  one was? Basic Instinct 2 risk addiction.
• 3:13
  Yeah. Yeah, I love this.
• 3:16
  But this would be 1/3 Basic Instinct.
• 3:18
  Film. I could see that happening.
• 3:20
  I mean, Sharon, would Sharon Stone do it?
• 3:22
  No, but I could imagine a reboot and like she's got a protege.
• 3:25
  Yeah, yeah, I will get Megan Fox in.
• 3:31
  I would see Megan Fox. No, she would eat it up.
• 3:35
  She's too horny. Too horny for a Basic Instinct?
• 3:40
  Yeah, she's you've got to have a bit of decorum.
• 3:43
  Yeah, a bit of refinement. Sharon Stone in those films.
• 3:46
  Yeah, she's kind of Waspy. She wears a.
• 3:48
  She wears cashmere. She oh, she did invent like Lux.
• 3:53
  What did we call it? Quiet luxury.
• 3:55
  Quiet luxury, that's what it was, Yeah.
• 3:57
  She was the inventor of it. There you go.
• 3:59
  And that's what I love about this podcast because I think
• 4:01
  listeners are learning things about these movies.
• 4:05
  Yeah, like, like, for example, if you go and listen to our
• 4:08
  Gayatrion episode on Masters of the Universe, you'll learn about
• 4:11
  legendary actress slash sorceress Christina Pickles.
• 4:14
  Oh. Chrissy Pickles.
• 4:18
  Chrissy picks Anyway, go subscribe now to the Gayatrion
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  support has enabled us to buy the equipment that it means that
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  we are in the same room together, feeling slightly
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  uncomfortable. Yes, and I mean a bit more
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  money. What could it be next?
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  We could have a set. Oh my God, I think we could be
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  in bed together. I mean, there is a bed in this
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  room. Truly, it is genuinely because
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  and their guests is always really great.
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  Love the idea of camp being something that unlocks queer
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  joy, which is a much better and more honest definition than the
• 5:31
  traditional Sontag inspired stuff that is often reached for.
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  I enjoy too that the movie plot summaries don't take up too much
• 5:37
  space. More time for the fun and
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  discussion. I haven't seen the 2004
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  Catwoman, but it will live internally in my mind now every
• 5:43
  time I reach for a serum. Oh, so nice, that's.
• 5:48
  So sweet. A bit of time writing as well.
• 5:50
  And I I think what they deserve for writing a comment like that
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  is diamond hard skin. Yes, yes.
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  I hope the serum works. And a little like sort of
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  slightly grown out Pixie crop. Oh yeah, yeah, a little bitchy
• 6:03
  fringe. Yeah, Joth St.
• 6:05
  C says Viva la baby lame. Love having baby lame back in
• 6:10
  the podcast universe and talking about the best movies.
• 6:13
  More, more, more. Was this you?
• 6:15
  No, it wasn't. I know that person is oh you do
• 6:19
  know, but I didn't ask them. Yeah, but that's lovely.
• 6:21
  I actually liked it as well. Someone on our Instagram
• 6:24
  commented on our Mummy Dearest podcast and you oh oh, there
• 6:27
  were issues to be had. Yeah, what did they say?
• 6:30
  Yeah, Burrito Horror commented on our Mummy Dearest episode.
• 6:34
  Such a brilliant podcast. I've never seen the movie but
• 6:36
  heard plenty about it. I loved Baby Lame and the
• 6:38
  Peaches. Christ inside.
• 6:40
  You were great. Also Crystal.
• 6:44
  What were you great at then? If we were giving really good
• 6:47
  insight and they loved that. No, just helping move the ship
• 6:50
  along. Probably you were.
• 6:51
  Great at that, yeah. Someone has to do it.
• 6:54
  Keep you bags on. Track if you want to sort of
• 6:57
  give me any more reviews in in how great I'm doing, they're
• 7:00
  always welcome listeners and you know, Crystal's here as well.
• 7:06
  OK, great, great gowns. But you know what?
• 7:09
  It's all about to change anyway because Crystal's about to get a
• 7:12
  brand new face. Aren't you Crystal?
• 7:14
  Oh my God. Let's talk about it.
• 7:18
  Yeah. Listen, because this is what
• 7:19
  happens when you're a famous person on the Internet or a
• 7:22
  gamers person. What?
• 7:24
  Where do you, where do you position yourself in the world
• 7:26
  of reality fame these days? Because you have a different
• 7:29
  you're like, gay famous, aren't you?
• 7:31
  I don't know about that. You're ish gay famous.
• 7:34
  Like people still know who you are, don't they?
• 7:36
  You know how gay like where is gay famous in terms of like
• 7:39
  ABCD? Well no, it's it's own sub
• 7:42
  genre. OK, but but like I'm like
• 7:44
  you're. Like you're Zed famous.
• 7:46
  But yeah, yeah. But so say say, if like gay
• 7:49
  famous is equivalent to like D fame, yeah, then like I'm like D
• 7:53
  gay. Oh, C minus gay.
• 7:57
  I'll give you C minus gay. What it does get you listeners
• 8:01
  is an invitation to Istanbul, a collaboration in beauty and
• 8:05
  aesthetics. I've had an invite to Turkey for
• 8:09
  a procedure of my choice, including hair transplant,
• 8:13
  breast augmentation or reduction.
• 8:15
  Oh, maybe I could finally get my big tits removed.
• 8:19
  Big boobs what? Is this, is this like a crisis
• 8:24
  intervention with you? No.
• 8:26
  But government, you need to have a.
• 8:27
  Yeah, yeah. It's like it's a real nagging,
• 8:30
  isn't it? But they've also offered cat eye
• 8:31
  surgery and I don't know what that is, but it sounds great.
• 8:34
  I think that's what Lindsay Lohan's had.
• 8:37
  Right. Along with like a mini facelift.
• 8:39
  No, it's just lime juice and Botox.
• 8:44
  Are you tempted by this? I don't know what I'd get.
• 8:48
  It's just hard when you're already.
• 8:50
  Perfect. Well, I read the e-mail because
• 8:52
  she scream grabbed it and apparently a guest can come for
• 8:54
  free as well. Yeah, but you don't get a three.
• 8:56
  No, but I'd come with you. We could do a podcast while
• 8:58
  you're on the surgery bed. While I'm getting a cat's eye.
• 9:01
  Yeah, like and then you've been put under and I've changed the
• 9:03
  picture, the reference picture. It was that scene.
• 9:08
  And is it in what Batman movie where he's like, give me the
• 9:12
  mirror. It's the Joker, isn't it in in
• 9:15
  Batman One? Yeah, Yeah.
• 9:16
  He's like, hand me the mirror and he sees it and he just
• 9:18
  starts cackling. That'll be you.
• 9:19
  We could do that. Yeah.
• 9:20
  It's a bit too faced as well with the subjective Yeah of
• 9:23
  Batman films. Oh my God.
• 9:26
  OK, we haven't gotten anywhere. No, this is going to be a a
• 9:29
  problem with in person recording.
• 9:31
  I can feel it already. Well, before we go any further
• 9:34
  baby, what makes a camp classic? What is a camp classic?
• 9:38
  A camp clap. Camp Clap Clam Classic is
• 9:41
  something that unlocks queer joy.
• 9:43
  Can we start a spin off podcast called Clam Classics?
• 9:45
  Clam, clam, Yes. Sorry.
• 9:50
  It needs to unlock queer joy. Yep.
• 9:52
  It needs to have an ongoing legacy, something that you have.
• 9:58
  It needs to be stupid. It needs to inform queer pop
• 10:00
  culture, and it needs to be. Flaccid.
• 10:04
  That's right, we want something that has underground plot vibes
• 10:08
  that's been reclaimed. I love it.
• 10:11
  OK, what's your history with this movie, Batman and Robin?
• 10:14
  I was talking about this earlier to my boyfriend.
• 10:16
  I have one memory of this movie, going to the cinema and seeing
• 10:20
  it and remembering when Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy says
• 10:25
  slippery when wet. Now the only, the only reason
• 10:28
  that has stayed in my mind was because there was this guy in
• 10:33
  the back row with his young son who let out like an audible
• 10:37
  sexual grunt when she said that. My God, he literally went, Oh
• 10:41
  yeah, like that. And I know because I turned
• 10:45
  around because I was so shocked. And it was just this guy sat
• 10:47
  next to like a 7 year old kid and I that's, that's, that is
• 10:51
  the only memory I had of this movie.
• 10:53
  That's so funny, I can't remember watching it but I know
• 10:56
  I did when I was 13, I mean. Because, I mean, clearly it's
• 11:00
  had a big impact on your life. Oh.
• 11:01
  Yeah, because I can recall you doing a Poison Ivy drag number.
• 11:05
  Yeah, one of my very first. And you had vines being pulled
• 11:10
  out of your ass. Come on out of.
• 11:11
  Me like lava. I think that's still got legs
• 11:13
  that number. And then it was in the era when
• 11:16
  I liked really literal pop songs for your numbers.
• 11:20
  So it was tinniculture Singer's poison.
• 11:31
  I mean, you've done quite a lot of BAT.
• 11:33
  Yeah, haven't. You.
• 11:34
  Well, the DC Universe does great female villains.
• 11:37
  Yeah, you've done Harley Quinn. You've done.
• 11:38
  Batwoman. Poison Ivy.
• 11:41
  Yeah. The big three.
• 11:42
  Yeah. This movie obviously shaped me
• 11:45
  so much. It was just like perfect for my
• 11:47
  eyes and I obviously would have had no idea the gay shit I was
• 11:52
  watching the the propaganda. I mean, let's.
• 11:55
  Let's be real, this film is gay propaganda.
• 11:58
  If ever I've seen like incredible, the gays are trying
• 12:02
  to like, it's a bit like, it's a bit like the first Batman film
• 12:06
  with the Joker, with the TV where he's like.
• 12:08
  Smiling, it's. Very much like we're going to
• 12:11
  make you all fucking huge benders by the time this film.
• 12:14
  The first shot of the movie is just clenched buttocks and
• 12:18
  crutches. Yeah.
• 12:20
  A bit of returns, doesn't it? It goes.
• 12:22
  It's like ass Dick. Ass.
• 12:25
  Nipples. Yeah, nipples.
• 12:27
  Ass again. Fisting glove.
• 12:30
  Robin logo barebacks onto a Batman logo.
• 12:34
  Well, it's interesting you talk about Paul naturally, because
• 12:37
  before we talk about this, I I was doing some investigation
• 12:40
  into Batman theme pornos. Oh yeah.
• 12:44
  And there's been quite, well, obviously there's been quite a
• 12:45
  lot as you can probably imagine, but I just wanted to talk you
• 12:48
  through a few of the ones that I've found that I think are the
• 12:50
  best ones. So there's this one is could
• 12:54
  have been what happened to Alicia Silverstone if this film
• 12:58
  was more successful. We have a film called Bat Bitch,
• 13:03
  which was basically, where's the write up for it that I've got
• 13:09
  the erotic ventures of Bat Bitch.
• 13:11
  So basically Bat Bitch fucks her way through an exciting venture
• 13:15
  of early 90s style and something to do.
• 13:17
  Russian spies bringing down Gotham City and she just fucks
• 13:21
  her way around everyone and then this sounds.
• 13:23
  Like a kind of plausible plot. Yeah, and then there's a sequel
• 13:25
  to it. Bat bitch to you, the Cape
• 13:27
  Bimbet. The caped bimbet, Yeah, Why does
• 13:30
  she have to be a bimbo? I know, I know, bat pussy.
• 13:33
  Why? Does she have to be a bimbo?
• 13:36
  Bat girls whole thing is that she's tough and smart.
• 13:39
  Yeah, and slightly boring. Yeah, but don't make her a.
• 13:43
  Fucking I know. I hate straight men.
• 13:45
  I know. Well I would.
• 13:46
  I would quite like to watch it, maybe for the Gator.
• 13:48
  Dom. I'm sure there is one of that as
• 13:50
  well, because there's Batman as well.
• 13:55
  Now we're talking where? Was the other one.
• 13:57
  There's another one I would. Also be a scat man.
• 13:59
  I'm a scat man. Oh, there has to be.
• 14:05
  Yeah. Where was the other?
• 14:06
  One Batman. Oh, I like this one.
• 14:09
  I mean, this one they've, they've really been worried
• 14:11
  about the lawsuit. So they've not kept it that
• 14:13
  close to the the the title 1989's The Adventures from
• 14:17
  Dickman and Throbbin. Dickman and Throbbin.
• 14:23
  Yeah, John Holmes, who plays Dickman, was the inspiration for
• 14:27
  Dirk Diggler in Booger Nights, the Mark Wahlberg character.
• 14:30
  So there we go. I linked it back to more general
• 14:32
  film. Good work.
• 14:33
  There we go, good work. I guess if you did like Auk 1
• 14:37
  you could call it Batty Man. Yeah.
• 14:40
  Batty isn't a thing in North America, no.
• 14:42
  But it's in like a Jamaican thing.
• 14:44
  Yeah, I guess, yeah. But I've only ever been called a
• 14:46
  Batty boy. Here I was when I'd first moved
• 14:51
  here. Someone kicked me as I was
• 14:52
  getting on the bus and called me a Batty boy.
• 14:54
  Ground breaking. I know I shouldn't laugh.
• 14:57
  It is Pride month as well, but I mean funny.
• 15:00
  Yeah. You are a Batty man.
• 15:01
  So. So was that the origin story?
• 15:03
  And then you showed you showed everyone how much of a Batty.
• 15:06
  Man, you are. I made it everyone else's
• 15:08
  problem for the next 15 years. So what are we talking about?
• 15:15
  Yeah, we're talking about 1997's Batman and Robin.
• 15:19
  Directed by Joel Schumacher. Starring everybody.
• 15:23
  Starring everybody. Star billing Arnold
• 15:25
  Schwarzenegger. Number one billing.
• 15:27
  He was the most famous person in this movie.
• 15:28
  He's the villain playing Mr. Freeze.
• 15:30
  We've got George Clooney as Batman.
• 15:32
  We've got what's he called? What?
• 15:35
  What exactly that's that's where his career is at the moment,
• 15:38
  isn't it? Chris O'Donnell.
• 15:39
  Chris O'Donnell. Oh, I mean, he's so hot.
• 15:42
  But yeah, he's his career has done sync.
• 15:44
  Isn't it? Yeah, well, he's, I mean.
• 15:46
  He's working, is he? Yeah.
• 15:47
  What was the last thing you did though?
• 15:49
  Doesn't he front a CSI show or something?
• 15:52
  That's all you've got, ACSI. Well.
• 15:54
  What's more than you've got? Well.
• 15:56
  A long running syndicated TV show like we could all be.
• 16:00
  So lucky Christina Pickles is not quaking anywhere.
• 16:06
  Yeah, you've got Chris O'Donnell, you've got Alicia
• 16:08
  Silverstone as Bat Bitch, the Cape been bet Uma Thurman.
• 16:16
  But it's it's got Coolio as a gang member.
• 16:19
  Vivica Fox. Yes, Vivica Fox, it was like, I
• 16:22
  really thought they were going to set her up with a bigger
• 16:23
  part, considering that costume and.
• 16:25
  She's got nothing. Do you know her character's
• 16:27
  name? No.
• 16:28
  You're not ready. Come on.
• 16:30
  Miss B Haven. Stop here.
• 16:36
  Vivica Fox as Misbehaven. They really.
• 16:39
  Got one line of dialogue. They were really like fuck you
• 16:42
  if you think you'll just have a part.
• 16:43
  Yeah, she's like trying to seduce Mr. Freeze at one point
• 16:46
  and he's like, I'm not into it. OK, that's literally it.
• 16:50
  My heart as cold as eyes. What do you say we heat things
• 16:55
  up? My passion.
• 16:57
  Thoughts for my bride alone. Yeah.
• 16:58
  Anyway, Yeah. Everyone's in this movie.
• 17:00
  It had a worldwide box office of $238 million, which sounds like
• 17:05
  a. Lot it does sound quite
• 17:07
  comparable to a lot of movies we talked about on this podcast
• 17:10
  that. Yeah, it's a huge box office.
• 17:12
  It was one of the biggest movies of the year, but they spent 160
• 17:15
  million on it, so it was a big disappointment.
• 17:18
  Didn't break even, basically. And it grossed less than Batman
• 17:22
  Forever, which had been a huge success.
• 17:25
  Biggest movie of the year when it came out.
• 17:28
  So everyone was very disappointed in this movie.
• 17:29
  Oh. Very, very, yeah, we're very
• 17:31
  disappointed with their. $238 million.
• 17:35
  It's got 11% on Rotten Tomatoes. Very bad, yes.
• 17:39
  And as it says on Wikipedia, Batman and Robin is considered
• 17:43
  to be one of the worst superhero films and among the worst films
• 17:46
  ever made. Yeah, I saw it's, it's topped
• 17:48
  quite a lot of polls. That's quite an.
• 17:49
  Achievement, isn't it? Yeah, yeah.
• 17:51
  It was so bad that it basically killed the superhero film until
• 17:56
  X-Men in 2002. Thousand.
• 17:58
  Yeah, I heard because the head guy of Marvel said it was like
• 18:01
  one of the most important superhero films of all time
• 18:05
  because it made it basically forced the industry to
• 18:08
  reconsider how you approach superhero films.
• 18:12
  Uma Thurman's power. I mean, she quite enjoyed it.
• 18:15
  Of course I tried to find like negative, you know, because
• 18:17
  normally with these kind of films, you know, they shit talk
• 18:20
  on it, don't they? And then eventually they come
• 18:22
  back round to it. Alec, you know, Halle Berry,
• 18:24
  Catwoman. But no, everything I've read
• 18:26
  with Emma Ferman was she's just like, no, I enjoyed it.
• 18:29
  But she also is consistently well reviewed in it, whereas
• 18:32
  everyone else does a bad job. I think she's she does a good
• 18:36
  job. I mean, it's like, it's a very
• 18:39
  notable performance, but everyone's like, wow, it's fun
• 18:43
  watching her. She's having such a great time.
• 18:45
  But everyone else who's been involved has apologized for it.
• 18:47
  There was a period in time where if you told George Clooney you'd
• 18:50
  seen Batman and Robin, he would give you $10.
• 18:52
  Oh my God. It's like, I'm sorry.
• 18:55
  That's hilarious. Batman is is a bit like
• 18:57
  Superman. It's just like, it's not a given
• 18:59
  it's going to be successful. Is it like, because Ben Affleck
• 19:02
  was a shit Batman? I think.
• 19:04
  Oh. Yeah, they always make hundreds
• 19:06
  of millions of dollars, but like, that doesn't necessarily
• 19:08
  mean they're doing well. Because I think we're even in
• 19:11
  shaky territory with the Robert Pattinson ones.
• 19:13
  Like, I don't feel like that's a.
• 19:15
  That was a It was a hit, wasn't. It yeah, but I don't know, it
• 19:18
  just feels I. Think it was a hit and I think
• 19:20
  it was critically well received. I don't know.
• 19:23
  Because they are making another one, aren't they?
• 19:25
  Yeah. But yeah, it was also nominated
• 19:28
  for 11 Razzies. It only won one worst supporting
• 19:32
  actress for Alicia Silverstone. I don't think that's deserved.
• 19:36
  She's not the worst thing in this movie.
• 19:38
  I know, but she's so underwhelming.
• 19:39
  Yeah, yeah, but she's not the worst thing in this movie.
• 19:42
  Because didn't they like they put her in this movie to
• 19:44
  basically attract young women to come and see the movie?
• 19:47
  Right. And because they needed someone
• 19:48
  to fight Boomerang. Yeah, because yeah, obviously,
• 19:51
  man. Can't beat up a woman?
• 19:52
  And obviously misbehaving. Yeah, what?
• 19:56
  Where's Misbehavin's origin story?
• 20:00
  One other little bit of trivia. I liked it.
• 20:01
  It was nominated for a Razi for Worst Original Song, but it also
• 20:05
  won a Grammy for the same song, Best Original Song.
• 20:08
  Which song is that? It's The Smashing Pumpkins.
• 20:11
  The end is the beginning is the end.
• 20:13
  Oh, and there's there's another notable song on this soundtrack
• 20:17
  as well, isn't there, by R Kelly.
• 20:19
  Gotham City. Oh yeah.
• 20:23
  Oh, I missed that. It's the city of justice, the
• 20:26
  city of hope. OK, great, great gowns.
• 20:30
  Basically he did I believe I can fly but Batman it up basically
• 20:34
  and it's called Gotham City. But again, like, nothing to do
• 20:38
  with the the movie. And apparently, like, there's
• 20:40
  like Jewel and those of other people have songs on the
• 20:43
  soundtrack. Cool.
• 20:44
  But none, yeah, but none of them feature on the the film.
• 20:48
  So it's just like a bunch of people singing songs that don't
• 20:50
  even have an appearance. I missed that era of soundtracks
• 20:53
  though. When it was a thing.
• 20:54
  Yeah, and people were like, doing songs for soundtracks, the
• 20:59
  Charlie's Angels soundtrack. Charlie's Angels.
• 21:01
  They were events. Cameron D and Destiny, Yeah, OK.
• 21:06
  I've got another quiz question for you.
• 21:08
  Go on. George Schumacher obviously
• 21:09
  directed this movie. He was an out gay man.
• 21:13
  This is from his personal life section on Wikipedia.
• 21:16
  Yeah, there's only a couple sentences, but one of them is
• 21:21
  how many men he estimates he's slept with in his lifetime, and
• 21:24
  I'd like you to guess the number.
• 21:26
  That's on his Wikipedia. Yes.
• 21:28
  Oh. I don't know.
• 21:29
  Well, I don't really know much about him, so I'm going to just
• 21:34
  say I think he was so busy with his film career.
• 21:36
  I think it's like 20 people. Schumacher was openly gay and
• 21:40
  described himself as extremely promiscuous, okay, estimating in
• 21:43
  a 2019 interview that he had sex with between 10,000 and 20,000
• 21:48
  men over the course of his lifetime.
• 21:51
  There's come stains all over the sheets.
• 21:54
  I mean, the only thing I will say about that as an estimate,
• 21:56
  it's like. It's a wide range.
• 21:57
  Yeah, to go from 10 to 20,000 is quite a lot.
• 22:01
  I mean, I wouldn't even know where to begin trying to go on
• 22:04
  my body. Is that what people call it?
• 22:06
  Body count? Body count, Yeah.
• 22:08
  Yeah, I just think it's so wonderful.
• 22:11
  Yeah, gay pride. He is dead.
• 22:14
  Unfortunately, he died from. Having sex gay, right?
• 22:18
  He's done a lot of like good serious movies, like he did a
• 22:21
  lot of 90s like procedural. He did A Time to Kill, he did
• 22:27
  The Client, he did The Lost Boys.
• 22:30
  Yeah, famously, St. Elmo's Fire.
• 22:33
  He did the new Phantom of the Opera.
• 22:34
  I say new, but the 2000s one, He's in a lot of big movies.
• 22:39
  He's not just Neon Camp. This is weird that this is the
• 22:43
  movie I kind of know him best for but anyway gay AF.
• 22:48
  He was also like a junkie on the streets until he was 40, and
• 22:52
  then he became a costume designer and then that led him
• 22:54
  into directing. So he like had a real midlife.
• 22:58
  That's career pivot, so there's hope for us still.
• 23:01
  Absolutely. Oh, that's great.
• 23:03
  That's a really aspirational story.
• 23:05
  Oh, I love that. And you were listening to the
• 23:07
  biography channel. That's it.
• 23:09
  Sorry. I just think it's fascinating.
• 23:11
  I love that this faggy, faggy man.
• 23:13
  Yeah, when he was like probably early 70s or late 60s was doing
• 23:18
  this gay porn movie and got getting $160 million to make it.
• 23:24
  I mean, apparently the nipples on the bat costume were because
• 23:28
  advances in rubber technology. That's what I read.
• 23:32
  No, apparently they worked out a way to kind of use a thinner
• 23:35
  material, like so you could get different.
• 23:38
  So it was lighter. And if you look at Michael
• 23:41
  Keaton's bat suit, it's actually quite big, but it's not, that's
• 23:43
  not because he's filling it out with his buff body.
• 23:45
  It's just actually just quite a big suit.
• 23:48
  But they managed to make it slimmer and tighter.
• 23:50
  And then he was like, wow, we've got this.
• 23:52
  And he gave an image of a Greek gods and they would like, OK,
• 23:56
  let's make it more anatomical. And then they were like, yeah,
• 23:59
  sure, let's go for nipples. I mean, I just get the Batman
• 24:03
  porn thing from looking at it. I know.
• 24:05
  I don't think I had a Batman fetish until I watched this
• 24:08
  movie again this week and I was like, Oh my God, yeah, what's
• 24:12
  happening to me? Am I?
• 24:14
  Is it OK to be watching this on a train?
• 24:16
  While I'm masturbating furiously but it's like you just want to
• 24:21
  have sex with both of them. Don't.
• 24:22
  You it's it's impossible to describe if you haven't seen
• 24:26
  this movie in a long time, just how much the movie starts with
• 24:30
  close-ups of ass and cock. Yeah.
• 24:32
  And I watched it. I, I, I when I, because I hadn't
• 24:35
  seen this for like a long time. And it hit me and I was like,
• 24:38
  what the fuck? And I went back again.
• 24:40
  I think I went back twice just to take it in.
• 24:43
  Why is the scene one hour long? As a message, what is that
• 24:47
  saying If you start the film and it is like Dick ass Dick fist?
• 24:52
  Well, it's like making the subtext of Batman, which has
• 24:56
  always been gay Batman and Robin, it's always been a gay
• 25:00
  joke. Like the Batman comics started a
• 25:04
  gay a gay panic in the 50s and 60s and the this guy wrote a
• 25:08
  book about how comics were ruining children's minds and
• 25:12
  singled out Batman as turning the kids gay.
• 25:14
  And what? Was the main reasons for that
• 25:16
  What? Because I don't know.
• 25:17
  Because it was like this older bachelor with a young boy, and
• 25:20
  they share a bed sometimes. And they share a bed.
• 25:24
  Yeah. Oh, OK.
• 25:26
  I'm gonna find it. This is the frame that, like, is
• 25:29
  the most notable when you're, like, talking about the gay
• 25:32
  subtext of Batman and Robin. And it's Bruce and Dick.
• 25:35
  I mean, his name is Dick. Yeah.
• 25:37
  Bruce and Dick waking up in bed. They're both in pyjamas.
• 25:41
  Morning. And it begins like any other
• 25:42
  routine morning in the lives of millionaire Bruce Wayne and his
• 25:45
  ward, Dick Grayson. And Bruce is saying that was a
• 25:48
  good sleep. Come on, Dick.
• 25:50
  A cold shower, a Big Breakfast. Oh.
• 25:53
  There's another panel where they're sunbathing nude with
• 25:58
  towels just over their asses, and they see the bat signal.
• 26:01
  It was always gay subjects. And I don't think anyone really
• 26:03
  intended it, but gay people found these comics and we're
• 26:07
  like, look at this, this is so fun.
• 26:09
  This Is Us. Because gay people in the 50s
• 26:11
  and 60s were like on the look for things like this.
• 26:14
  And so Batman's always been kind of revered in that space of
• 26:18
  people trying to find a queer icon where there were no queer
• 26:21
  icons. And and then it started a moral
• 26:24
  panic. And so queer people started to
• 26:26
  love him even more because he was almost the first cancelled
• 26:29
  gay person, even though he wasn't ever really gay.
• 26:31
  And then I guess it goes into a realm of like, as much as people
• 26:35
  try and mask up Batman, it's just going to make it hotter for
• 26:37
  the gays, isn't it? Because he's just more of a
• 26:40
  fucking like Muscle Mary closet case.
• 26:44
  Yeah, hot piece of trade. Yeah, yeah.
• 26:47
  So Joel Schumacher was just, I think, having a lovely time
• 26:50
  playing with that idea that that everyone already was aware of.
• 26:55
  It is just wild that he was given all this money to do it.
• 26:58
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 26:59
  Should we get into the plot? Yeah.
• 27:04
  OK, so we've got Batman and Robin gearing up in a flashy
• 27:08
  montage. You can say that again, fleshy.
• 27:11
  I'd say we've got the Batmobile. We've got the Bat Cave.
• 27:14
  I gotta say already, immediately, the sets.
• 27:18
  Incredible. I as a film from 1997, visually
• 27:24
  it actually hasn't dated that badly in terms of like, I mean,
• 27:27
  it's very like stylistic, but I wasn't looking at it like,
• 27:31
  that's so embarrassing. It's kind of cool.
• 27:33
  Yeah, it's cool. Someone was saying to me the
• 27:35
  other day that they feel like it's like a musical.
• 27:38
  It's kind of got that kind of like showy things do feel like
• 27:42
  sets, but like in a fun way. Like you could tell like if you
• 27:46
  looked around the corner it wouldn't work.
• 27:48
  But it's got that kind of stagey feel, which, I don't know, I
• 27:53
  really like it aesthetically. I think it's because we see less
• 27:55
  and less like physical sets, don't we?
• 27:57
  So it's like, yeah, I loved it as well, but this film has the
• 28:00
  first ever CGI properly used in films as well.
• 28:03
  Surely not in 97. Yeah, it's the first type of
• 28:06
  CGI. I'm sure I read it.
• 28:08
  It's the bit where they are skating through the sky.
• 28:12
  Oh, you mean when they're surfing from space?
• 28:15
  Yeah, apparently that's that that, yeah, that that was the
• 28:17
  first time it was used like that.
• 28:19
  I think in maybe it's a particular type of CGI, but
• 28:23
  yeah. I believe it.
• 28:24
  I believe it. We'll get there very shortly.
• 28:26
  I mean it's it's hard to explain how much happens in the 1st 5
• 28:29
  minutes of this movie, but there is a new villain in town and and
• 28:34
  it's Mr. Freeze. He's robbing.
• 28:36
  He's robbing some diamonds and Batman and Robin arrived to stop
• 28:39
  him. And he's assisted by the cast of
• 28:41
  Cirque du Soleil as they like to flips and play hockey.
• 28:46
  Yeah, yeah. It's like the Canadian ice
• 28:48
  hockey team moonlighting as Cirque du Soleil and they're
• 28:53
  kind of dressed like snowmen. Yeah, yeah, that's that.
• 28:56
  I think that describes it perfectly.
• 28:58
  It's great. Mr. Freeze then escapes in a
• 29:00
  rocket ship. That's shaped like a penis,
• 29:02
  Yeah, and it is definitely a penis shape.
• 29:07
  That is the way it has like a curb blend at the end like it is
• 29:13
  and it goes straight through that like a circular window.
• 29:17
  It's so insane within the 1st 5 minutes of this movie you've got
• 29:21
  ass Dick, you've got ice hockey fight scene.
• 29:26
  Then they go to space and they escape the spacecraft by surfing
• 29:30
  through the air. And Robin is surfing through
• 29:33
  space on a the door of a spaceship saying cowabunga.
• 29:37
  And that's the movie you're watching, folks.
• 29:39
  And I feel like one thing they've done is in this film is
• 29:41
  they cram a lot in very, very quickly like that.
• 29:45
  In most action films that would be like over the course of like
• 29:48
  45 minutes. Honestly, it's like, how has
• 29:50
  this all happened already? Like they didn't need to go to
• 29:53
  space. I'll just say it.
• 29:55
  But fuck it, why? Not Yeah, great.
• 29:57
  Why not everything? Why not everything?
• 30:02
  Anyway, Mr. Freeze gets away. He returns to his lair, which is
• 30:05
  an old ice cream factory, and we learn what his motives are.
• 30:10
  He's he's stealing diamonds to power his freezing suit and to
• 30:17
  save his cryogenically frozen wife, Nora.
• 30:20
  Oh, poor Nora. Poor Nora.
• 30:21
  This is something I hate from the get go, though.
• 30:23
  I hate a villain that's got, like an earnest reason.
• 30:26
  Oh, do you? Yeah.
• 30:27
  I like a villain. That's that's if something's
• 30:29
  happened to them why they've turned bad.
• 30:32
  But then I like them like to have sort of crossed over to the
• 30:36
  dark side. Yeah, I know that he is evil is
• 30:39
  still this like he's just doing it for his.
• 30:42
  His his character makes the least sense of anyone and that
• 30:45
  is saying something in this movie.
• 30:47
  But like you're right because his whole motivation is saving
• 30:50
  his wife so why is he evil? Why does he also want to destroy
• 30:53
  the world? That's a good point.
• 30:55
  He was a doctor. In fact, he wasn't a doctor,
• 30:58
  just a doctor. He was, as we find out later, oh
• 31:02
  doctor, Doctor Victor Freeze, two time Olympic decathlete and
• 31:05
  Nobel Prize winner who accidentally fell in a VAT of
• 31:10
  freezing and turned evil because fell into VAT.
• 31:16
  Everyone falls into that in this movie.
• 31:17
  Yeah, well. And if that happens to you, you
• 31:20
  will get superpowers and you will be evil.
• 31:22
  Yeah, exactly. That's what we learned from
• 31:23
  this, isn't it? But I mean, I guess it's a noble
• 31:25
  thing that he's trying to get old Nora back.
• 31:27
  Yeah. I think it just feels very like
• 31:29
  wannabe Tim Burton. Sure, sure, sure.
• 31:32
  Because it's got the kind of Edward Scissorhands Tim Burton
• 31:34
  has soundtrack like a kind of a beautiful.
• 31:37
  And I'm like, what, is there gonna be a fucking ballet based
• 31:40
  on this? Do you know what I mean?
• 31:41
  Yeah. Yeah, this movie doesn't have
• 31:43
  the time, energy or capabilities to deal with any themes it's
• 31:49
  trying to set up, so it might as well just not give anyone any
• 31:52
  motivation because it's really never going to be explored fully
• 31:55
  enough to matter. But like, if this movie was done
• 31:58
  by Tim Burton, you'd be like, oh, this is an interesting,
• 32:00
  tragically flawed villain. And it would.
• 32:03
  There's something. And he's, he's having to make
• 32:05
  sacrifices and he's morally compromised.
• 32:07
  Great. I could imagine that working.
• 32:09
  This isn't that movie. Do you think Doctor Freeze is
• 32:12
  just like a naturally kind of funny guy with his puns, or do
• 32:14
  you think he's had to? Like do you think he sits and
• 32:17
  writes down all of his puns? Every morning he's like I got
• 32:20
  another one. They're not even good puns
• 32:22
  though, are they in? This universe, there's only one
• 32:27
  absolute Everything freezes. What does that even mean?
• 32:36
  Everything freezes. That's not true.
• 32:39
  What about mercury? I don't think that is a
• 32:42
  universal absolute. I don't think everything does
• 32:44
  freeze liquid nitrogen. Hello.
• 32:50
  I could look. I've got 2 off the top of my.
• 32:51
  Head off the top of your head. Yeah, like.
• 32:55
  I You're supposed to be a two time decathlete and Nobel Prize
• 32:58
  winner, Mr. Freeze dumb. Dumb.
• 33:00
  Why? Is he Mr. Freeze if he's a
• 33:02
  doctor? Yeah, that's a good point.
• 33:03
  But yeah, why wouldn't you just own being Doctor Freeze?
• 33:06
  You know what happened to the dinosaurs?
• 33:08
  That's. Quite good.
• 33:10
  I say it is crazy to me that Arnold Schwarzenegger was the
• 33:15
  biggest movie star in the world at some point.
• 33:19
  Do you know who else was in the running to play Doctor Frise if
• 33:22
  it wasn't Arnie? Patrick Stewart?
• 33:25
  No, I read as Sylvester Stallone was the second choice.
• 33:28
  What? And then drum roll Hulk Hogan.
• 33:35
  That is very Joel didn't get the full budget for the movie.
• 33:38
  This is now ATV movie with starring Hulk Hogan.
• 33:41
  Oh my. God, I wonder how that would
• 33:43
  have impacted the viewing experience.
• 33:46
  The thing is, Arnold Schwarzenegger is very
• 33:48
  watchable, but he's terrible. Also, it's his casting makes me
• 33:55
  think of like, have they literally gone?
• 33:58
  What worked with Batman Returns and how can we make it work with
• 34:02
  this film? So Danny DeVito starred with
• 34:05
  Arnold Schwarzenegger and Twins, so we'll get him in.
• 34:08
  We've got OK, Michelle Pfeiffer as like a crazy cat bitch, OK,
• 34:13
  who's hot that can play crazy Uma Ferb.
• 34:15
  It literally feels that everyone's transferable with
• 34:19
  this cast. Yeah, yeah, it's there aren't.
• 34:22
  I mean, but that's also like part of the flaw of the comics,
• 34:25
  I guess, because there's kind of like tropes, isn't there?
• 34:28
  But yeah, I mean, Uma Thurman, Poison Ivy's origin story in
• 34:32
  this movie is basically the exact same as Michelle
• 34:34
  Pfeiffer's Batman Returns. Evil boss gets murdered,
• 34:39
  transforms into a sexy, villainous version of herself.
• 34:41
  From dowdy to sex. But at least if Batman Returns
• 34:44
  they actually pad out the Selena back story and they like give it
• 34:49
  some weight and some character development in this.
• 34:53
  I don't think I've ever seen an origin story of a villain done
• 34:56
  so quickly, is it? It's like they're in my head and
• 35:00
  it's like, oh, no one actually cares about this.
• 35:02
  Let's get to the action. So it's literally her just being
• 35:04
  like, oh, talking to herself. Oh, if only my.
• 35:08
  Mutant Plants. Would work, but my evil boss
• 35:11
  won't let me in and see what he's doing and keeps on making
• 35:13
  me see their venom. Oh, what's that noise?
• 35:16
  Oh, what are you doing? That's right.
• 35:18
  I'm going to kill you. No.
• 35:19
  And then that's it. This, this whole movie is very
• 35:24
  yada yada, yada. Then and now we're doing this
• 35:27
  part like Batgirl, she'll find the Bat Cave, then yadda yadda
• 35:31
  yadda. She's Batgirl and you don't need
• 35:33
  to worry about any of the in between.
• 35:35
  Poison Ivy, she's pushed into a pit, yadda yadda yadda.
• 35:39
  She's hot now. And I kind of don't mind that
• 35:43
  kind of storytelling, but it doesn't make a good movie.
• 35:46
  It doesn't make a good movie. But I mean, let's talk about Uma
• 35:49
  Thurman's origin then. So as we just said, it's very,
• 35:52
  very quick, but I'm from the get go.
• 35:55
  She's incredibly watchable. Oh yeah.
• 35:57
  Like as this like little geeky pre Greta Thunberg.
• 36:02
  Like kind of. Eco Warrior.
• 36:04
  Yeah. Yeah, she does a great job at
• 36:09
  being mousy. It's.
• 36:11
  It's such a luxury for a pretty actress though, isn't it?
• 36:14
  Because it's like, look, I can play a little geeky Gookie.
• 36:19
  She's having such a good time. Oh.
• 36:22
  You would as well, playing that role.
• 36:24
  It's like. We've also had the creation of
• 36:26
  the venom fueled monster Bane. I liked how kind of creepy that,
• 36:30
  yeah, like they inject this serial killer with toxins and he
• 36:35
  it's like kind of body horror. He like swells up and becomes a
• 36:38
  monster. It's like cartoony but also kind
• 36:41
  of gross. Yeah, that was like one of the
• 36:42
  few bits I was like, oh, this is kind of weird and cool.
• 36:45
  Yeah, I mean, the guy playing the mad professor, it's like
• 36:49
  it's the most literal representation of a mad
• 36:52
  professor I think I've ever seen in film.
• 36:53
  Yeah, so that's John Glover. Who's in?
• 36:56
  He was in the Superman TV show. Oh, OK, It's Smallville.
• 37:00
  It's literally like I'm a crazy scientist.
• 37:02
  Yeah. He apparently, he said it was
• 37:07
  really hard to make this movie because every time before Ushots
• 37:10
  started shooting, Joel Schumacher would go on a
• 37:12
  megaphone. Remember everyone, this is a
• 37:14
  cartoon. OK, well, it's kind of, I think
• 37:17
  the whole thing, if you're viewing it as a comic book, it's
• 37:20
  it's very comic booky to me. Yeah, Yeah.
• 37:22
  Well, it's a toy commercial, isn't it?
• 37:24
  Yeah, it's yeah, that more and that's why I guess there's so
• 37:26
  many characters as well, because all the different.
• 37:28
  Yeah, we need Bane. We need a Batmobile.
• 37:30
  We need a misbehaving. We need a Bat Cycle.
• 37:34
  We need the bat fisting glove. The bat Zamboni.
• 37:38
  Apparently, Mr. Freeze's suit cost $1.5 million to make.
• 37:42
  It's just got a couple of LED lights in it.
• 37:44
  I. Think it looks pretty cool but.
• 37:46
  1.5 million 1.5 I mean I feel like I've been ripped off with
• 37:49
  some drag outfits before but I don't think.
• 37:53
  The other thing was that so the IT had a battery life of 10
• 37:58
  minutes, so they could only shoot for 10 minutes at a time
• 38:02
  before they had to put all the new.
• 38:04
  Batteries in their place. Everything.
• 38:06
  And Arnold could only shoot for 12 hours a day, and it took him
• 38:09
  six hours to get into makeup. So they only had him for six
• 38:12
  hours a day. And so most of his stuff was
• 38:15
  done by stunt double s. So Chris O'Donnell said he never
• 38:19
  shot a scene with him. Oh.
• 38:20
  My God. And Arnold Schwarzenegger was
• 38:22
  like the highest paid. Yeah, he got $25 million for
• 38:24
  this movie. That's OK for some, isn't it?
• 38:26
  Yeah, the other thing I would say about Mr. Freeze is like
• 38:30
  there's a couple shots of his face close up when like in his
• 38:33
  makeup, it's so beautiful. It's almost like a moon Claire
• 38:36
  sort of thing. It's it's stunning.
• 38:38
  Like the glitter on his face. I don't know.
• 38:41
  It's. It's really, really.
• 38:43
  Nice and everything, yeah. Yeah, it's like.
• 38:46
  Yeah, it's kind of giving like a McQueen, sort of.
• 38:49
  And when he escapes, tries to escape the prison that he's been
• 38:52
  put in, he kind of like goes a bit like zombie in his.
• 38:55
  Eyes. Oh, that makeup's good.
• 38:56
  Yeah, really cool. Yeah, there's like the
• 38:59
  production value on this movie I think is really special.
• 39:03
  Yeah. Costume, set, makeup, it's
• 39:05
  really cool. It's like created such a
• 39:08
  blueprint as well. Like when you think of Poison
• 39:10
  Ivy, you think of those details she's got over her eyes, the
• 39:14
  stickers, you think of those space buns.
• 39:16
  Like it really nailed a style. Really cool.
• 39:20
  Anyway, Poison Ivy, she's come to Gotham to promote her eco
• 39:24
  terrorist agenda because she wants the world to be taken over
• 39:26
  our plants. She's sick of humanity.
• 39:28
  And can I just say, George Clooney as Batman is such a
• 39:31
  prick the way he talks to her when she comes in with her
• 39:34
  detoxification of the world plan.
• 39:37
  And admittedly, she does want to kill all.
• 39:40
  But he doesn't know that yet. No, but he just like talks down
• 39:43
  to her so much and he's like Miss and she's like doctor.
• 39:45
  It's just like from the get go, it's like.
• 39:48
  Yeah, he's a prick, Yeah. But then this just made me
• 39:50
  think, I'm like, is this just a is this just a queer thing?
• 39:53
  Do straight people genuinely watch these films and want
• 39:56
  Batman and Robin to win? Because I didn't obviously never
• 40:00
  once wanted them to win. And I just want Poison Ivy to
• 40:02
  win. Do straight people watch these
• 40:04
  films and do they root for them? Is that the?
• 40:06
  Is that the difference? That's an interesting question.
• 40:10
  But I don't know, do they want Batman to win?
• 40:12
  Straight people, are you listening?
• 40:14
  Yeah. Can you answer our questions?
• 40:15
  Because I just, I just don't get it.
• 40:17
  And maybe that's that's the difference.
• 40:19
  There we go. But yeah, I was just like from
• 40:21
  the get goers. It's like he's such a cunt.
• 40:23
  Yeah. Excuse me, French.
• 40:25
  Yeah. I feel bad for George Clooney in
• 40:27
  this movie. He he's a fish out of water.
• 40:29
  He doesn't know what to do. And I mean I also wouldn't in in
• 40:34
  his position. Well, no.
• 40:35
  And as someone who's got a burgeoning film career as well,
• 40:38
  you know about these things. Don't.
• 40:39
  You but like, what would you do if you were him and this is your
• 40:43
  first big movie and apparently he was shooting ER at the same
• 40:47
  time. So he was shooting ER Monday to
• 40:48
  Thursday, and he was shooting Batman and Robin Friday to
• 40:50
  Sunday. I would tell ER to like Go and
• 40:53
  he was. Contracted.
• 40:54
  Oh shit, yeah. So they like worked out like a
• 40:58
  filming schedule for him. That's crazy.
• 41:00
  It is crazy, but it's also crazy because he's had such a
• 41:02
  successful acting career after it.
• 41:04
  I know he's like this did launch him as a movie star.
• 41:06
  Yeah, even though it was a terrible Batman and.
• 41:10
  He's not good in it. Where are we in the plot?
• 41:12
  We are. We've got to an old Poison Ivy
• 41:17
  has crashed the party and then Batman's rude to her and invites
• 41:23
  her to the charity ball. That's right, the charity ball.
• 41:27
  A formative scene for me. So Batman and Robin are trying
• 41:32
  to lure Mr. Freeze into some kind of trap by auctioning off
• 41:36
  some diamonds. Slash, it gets a bit sex
• 41:40
  trafficky. Oh.
• 41:42
  Yeah, they're selling dates. Oh, are they just selling the
• 41:45
  women? It's it's very.
• 41:46
  Miss Magnolia? It's like a jungle themed sex
• 41:50
  market. Forgot about this.
• 41:55
  And the women who are for sale are themed after flowers.
• 42:00
  Yeah, which is again just like and then it's just lots of
• 42:04
  gross. Open, I'll give $10,000.
• 42:08
  Yeah, it's so awkward, but also it's giving like nightmare
• 42:14
  corporate. I think for people that are
• 42:17
  involved in like drag or the entertainment, this is the kind
• 42:20
  of gig you might get paid quite a lot of money to perform at,
• 42:22
  but you you're probably being paid to be an immersive actor
• 42:24
  and it is like you're hating every second of it.
• 42:27
  So yeah, Batman and Robin, they're there, they're on the
• 42:30
  auction stage. And then enter Pink Gorilla.
• 42:35
  They're this pink gorilla takes the stage and somehow captivates
• 42:40
  the entire room. The entire room turns to watch
• 42:42
  this pink gorilla and you see Poison Ivy do a striptease from
• 42:46
  a gorilla suit and it's it's drag.
• 42:49
  It's burlesque. It is.
• 42:50
  It is like top tier drag. I've always wanted that gorilla
• 42:55
  costume. I just think it would be such an
• 42:57
  amazing way to start a number. It is, the whole thing is great
• 43:01
  and it the whole thing is so dragged, including the cheap
• 43:04
  tinny sounding backing track that's been ripped off of
• 43:07
  YouTube and not downloaded properly because it just sounds
• 43:10
  so echo Doo. Doo Doo Doo Doo.
• 43:13
  Doo and I love as well that like she can't fucking move.
• 43:17
  No, she actually can't move. She's giving me Mariah.
• 43:20
  I mean. She's got, she's got a beautiful
• 43:22
  body. But also, do you know what this
• 43:23
  this is from this scene? No.
• 43:25
  So this is how gay this film is. And we're talking about this
• 43:28
  film being like gay propaganda. So Joel Schumacher has said that
• 43:31
  he wasn't even just influenced. He stole this from a Marlena
• 43:34
  Dietrich movie Perfect, where she appears in a gorilla suit
• 43:38
  and repeals herself and strips out of it.
• 43:40
  So it's it's a proper reference to Marlena Dietrich.
• 43:43
  That's so cool. But that's why I love, I do love
• 43:45
  the choices they've done with the Poison Ivy character because
• 43:49
  they've just fully gone down that old Hollywood.
• 43:53
  I mean, she's doing Mae West. Yeah, the way she speaks
• 43:55
  everything and like I love the way whenever she kisses someone,
• 43:58
  the way it's lit and the way her eyes look up.
• 44:00
  I just think it's like it's such a well known.
• 44:04
  Reference. You're so right that that kind
• 44:06
  of, Yeah. That old Hollywood gaze, yeah.
• 44:09
  That's clearly gay, but I also just think it's so appropriate.
• 44:13
  And I also think it's like something that like on a a mass
• 44:16
  commercial film, not many people would think to do.
• 44:20
  And that's why it pops and that's why it gives her another
• 44:22
  thing as a villain. It's like gives her something.
• 44:24
  Yeah, yeah, it's so fab. And she's like seducing the
• 44:28
  audience with her pheromones. She's got, she's got sexy dust
• 44:32
  that makes everyone love her. And she just looks so good.
• 44:35
  This is one of the first time we see her in Poison Ivy Drag.
• 44:39
  Yeah. And it's like, what an entrance.
• 44:43
  What a fucking entrance. We could only dream.
• 44:46
  Well actually this is where my conspiracy theory comes in to
• 44:50
  just add to the more political queer agenda.
• 44:53
  I think that Poison Ivy is a doll.
• 44:56
  I think she's a trans woman. I think Bane is her T boy that's
• 45:01
  been pumped to have steroids and testosterone.
• 45:05
  God, you're so right. I think Batman and Robin are in
• 45:09
  a gay relationship, obviously. Yeah, they're the toxic G gays.
• 45:13
  They're the toxic G gays that have just.
• 45:14
  Been gay The gay scene. That have just decided to open
• 45:17
  up their relationship. It carries on.
• 45:21
  Alicia Silverstone is back up. She's a dike on a bike.
• 45:24
  She's. Such a it's just basically queer
• 45:27
  life. Oh my God.
• 45:30
  And like what trans women do you know, who don't want to destroy
• 45:34
  all of society and remake it in their image?
• 45:36
  Yeah. And they are literally Mother
• 45:39
  Nature and we're going to burn this fucker to the ground and
• 45:42
  regrow it the right way. Yeah, I think she's a doll.
• 45:45
  And but that's why when I, when I I'm saying this now, because
• 45:50
  obviously we could talk about this after we got through the
• 45:52
  plot. But I'm saying this now because
• 45:53
  when I watch this scene, this is when it connected to me and all
• 45:56
  of the pieces connected and then I I could only watch the rest of
• 46:00
  this movie with this narrative in my head, which made it even
• 46:02
  more enjoyable for me. That's that's so delicious.
• 46:07
  I kind of just want to watch it again now with that with that
• 46:09
  lens. But you're so right.
• 46:11
  You're so right. So yeah, we've got sex
• 46:13
  trafficking, we've got drag that's happened.
• 46:16
  We've got the doll. Oh, yeah.
• 46:18
  So obviously Poison Ivy gets the highest bid.
• 46:21
  She puts her love dust on Batman and Robin.
• 46:25
  And love dust and. Starts to sow the seeds of their
• 46:29
  undoing. Then there's a fight.
• 46:30
  Mr. Freeze arrives. He there's a fight and they
• 46:33
  capture Mr. Freeze and he gets imprisoned in Arkham Asylum.
• 46:37
  But Poison Ivy's kind of impressed with Mr. Freeze.
• 46:39
  She's like, who's this big cold pong God?
• 46:43
  He's a God. Poison Ivy breaks Freeze out of
• 46:47
  Arkham and persuades him to join forces.
• 46:51
  He'll freeze the world and she she'll rebuild it with mutant
• 46:54
  plants. I mean, it's a great idea.
• 46:57
  It's a great idea. It doesn't make any sense, you
• 46:59
  know, for Mr. Freeze as a character.
• 47:02
  I'm not sure why he wants to do this.
• 47:04
  I thought he just wanted some diamonds to save his wife.
• 47:06
  Probably. He could have gone to Batman and
• 47:08
  said, can I have some diamonds? I'd like to save my wife.
• 47:10
  And he probably would have just given them.
• 47:12
  Yeah, especially because the numbers they were throwing
• 47:13
  around to get old Poison Ivy, $7,000,000 and he gets his card
• 47:17
  out, doesn't he? Yeah.
• 47:18
  Oh yeah, Batman's got the Batman Forever platinum Amex.
• 47:23
  Oh, quick cut to Wayne Manor. Alfred's dying.
• 47:26
  Oh. Yeah, again, they're really
• 47:30
  dealing with these subjects. Like gently.
• 47:32
  Yeah. He's got, he's also got
• 47:34
  McGregor's disease, which is the same disease that.
• 47:36
  No shit. His wife has I don't know how
• 47:39
  what? Stage 1.
• 47:40
  It's only got stage 1, not stage 4 like like old Nora.
• 47:44
  And then this is where we find that old Daikon, a bike is a bad
• 47:47
  girl because she's wearing eyeliner.
• 47:48
  Yeah, I'll enter Barbara Wilson. She's just got expelled from
• 47:53
  Oxbridge. Oxbridge, yes.
• 47:55
  It's in England. Alfred's English.
• 48:00
  She's just been at English boarding school.
• 48:03
  Well, her parents died. But she's American.
• 48:08
  But her parents don't worry about it.
• 48:09
  Her parents died, though. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 48:10
  She said that very quickly. My parents died five years ago.
• 48:12
  My parents died. She's living at Wayne Manor.
• 48:15
  Her parents have to be dead. And she doesn't like the fancy
• 48:18
  Smanchy. Like, Oh no, no, no, yeah,
• 48:21
  she'll, she'll put up with it if she has to.
• 48:23
  Because don't Robin's parents die in Batman Forever?
• 48:28
  They're trapeze artists and they, like, fall to their death.
• 48:30
  Oh, Ish remembered that. I only remembered the that from
• 48:33
  him saying he was in the circus again in this movie, but I don't
• 48:35
  really recall. That and so this is also very
• 48:37
  yadda yadda yadda dead parents. What we're doing now, basically,
• 48:43
  don't worry about that. The closest thing to this
• 48:45
  podcast that we just us going yadda yadda yadda yadda gay
• 48:49
  shit. But with lovely sets, Yes,
• 48:51
  beautiful gowns, beautiful. Gowns have you got to Poison Ivy
• 48:55
  redecorating? The game, the bath house, yes.
• 49:02
  She comes, she stumbles across the Turkish bath house with Bade
• 49:05
  and she's like, MMM, this looks promising.
• 49:08
  I can use a woman's touch and. It's like she enters it.
• 49:13
  It's like, oh, there seem to be other people that live here.
• 49:16
  How inconvenient, honey. Houseguests Bane.
• 49:22
  See if you can show them the door.
• 49:24
  Yeah, that's. My garden needs.
• 49:28
  Tending can't rob for me, my babies.
• 49:32
  Anyway. It is very dull coated to go to
• 49:36
  the gay bath house and take it over and turn it into a plant, a
• 49:40
  plant garden and get rid of the CIS Bros, yeah.
• 49:43
  Yeah, the other thing I just love about good old Dolph Dolph
• 49:49
  friend Poison Ivy is how unlike organic her lair is.
• 49:54
  It's basically a Teemu buyout, isn't it?
• 49:56
  Oh yeah, every plant is made of. Plastic, yes, it's like.
• 50:00
  She's just, she's saying one thing.
• 50:02
  I want to, you know, I want the world to be at this rich,
• 50:05
  organic place again. And it there she is, that she
• 50:08
  like, sponsored by Sheen. Yeah, it's so Sheen and nothing
• 50:11
  I have not. Seen like a real bit of foliage
• 50:14
  on that woman. You're so right.
• 50:15
  Even like her costume. Is clearly a synthetic use a
• 50:18
  silk sweetie. Yeah, I love that, like she
• 50:21
  said, she said about. How, like, hard her suit was to
• 50:24
  get on. And I'm like, baby, that's like
• 50:26
  a Smippy's cat suit if ever I've seen one.
• 50:28
  Yeah. She looks hot though.
• 50:31
  Oh, she's looks incredible, Yeah.
• 50:33
  It's a shame they didn't give her like a.
• 50:34
  Leather, green leather, or like a green vinyl because that's
• 50:39
  just what is missing because it just does look like spandex.
• 50:41
  Or at least give it a rhinestone.
• 50:44
  Yeah, it was kind of drag pre. Rhinestone days, though, wasn't
• 50:47
  it? Yeah, yeah.
• 50:49
  So yeah, she's, she's redecorated the Turkish bar.
• 50:52
  Yeah, she's. Oh and then there's a fight at
• 50:55
  Mr. freezes lair. Poison Ivy was like don't worry
• 50:59
  I'll get your wife safe. But what she really does is give
• 51:03
  more of Pixie magic tea year old dust to Batman and Robin dolling
• 51:08
  them up. She's she's transing Batman and
• 51:14
  Robin. Yeah.
• 51:18
  And they're both fighting over her.
• 51:21
  And in the chaos, she also unplugs Mr. Freeze's wife, which
• 51:25
  is the quote I said right at the beginning.
• 51:26
  I've never. Been good with competition.
• 51:28
  Who needs a frigid wife anyway? I don't know why I'm saying it
• 51:32
  like Kim Cattrall insects of the city, but yeah, I'm a kid,
• 51:35
  Piabo. Set a right for cable window
• 51:38
  Latin equals and that's when she then.
• 51:40
  Tells Freeze that it was Batman. Yeah, he killed the wife and
• 51:44
  then they should be Adam and Eve, Adam and evil, and that's
• 51:48
  when. Mr. Freeze gets really on board
• 51:49
  with this world domination plan back at Wayne Manor.
• 51:53
  We've got Barbara finding the bat cave.
• 51:57
  Alfred's dying, I'm not going to lie, that I use.
• 52:00
  This as a bit of a mental break when I got to the Alfred dying
• 52:03
  stuff as I kind of switched off from there.
• 52:05
  I was like, but did you switch back on for her?
• 52:08
  Doing the passwords? Yeah, Peg.
• 52:11
  The password to the bat cave is pegging.
• 52:16
  She's a computer genius. The first password she tries is
• 52:19
  England, then she tries Alfred, and then the final password is
• 52:25
  Peg, which you know that unlocks everything you need to know to
• 52:29
  go to the layer. The.
• 52:31
  Bat cave access to all the technology, it's just Peg and
• 52:35
  then that's when she gets her little.
• 52:36
  Outfit on well and she's first. She talks to us.
• 52:39
  An AI version of Alfred. Forward thinking AI of speaking.
• 52:43
  About algorithms before we knew what algorithms were, but I did.
• 52:46
  I will say one thing about Alicia Silverstone, because this
• 52:48
  was two years after Clueless, right?
• 52:53
  This I think this is the reason why.
• 52:55
  She has not been a sort of a world famous film actress
• 53:01
  because I just don't think she has it.
• 53:03
  I don't think she has the star appeal and I don't think she
• 53:08
  needs to be like sexy to do well in this role.
• 53:12
  But I just she just is so lackluster to me, right?
• 53:16
  She would actually. If they leaned into maybe maybe
• 53:19
  her more in like a Kristen Stewart sort of way.
• 53:22
  Like what if if she could channel disaffected.
• 53:25
  Yeah. But like, she's in this movie
• 53:26
  that's so colorful, so over the top.
• 53:28
  So it it demands bigness. And yeah, you're right.
• 53:32
  She doesn't really give it. Yeah, I just, I just don't.
• 53:35
  Really know? Yeah, what I know, but the movie
• 53:37
  also doesn't know the movie. Has no idea what?
• 53:40
  Oh, she's a feminist as well, though isn't.
• 53:42
  It as we later find out, there's AI mean there's a motorcycle.
• 53:45
  Rally that we haven't with Coolio, that we haven't covered.
• 53:49
  Because. Why is there a motorcycle rally?
• 53:51
  Well, because we need to show that she's a bad girl.
• 53:53
  And she knows how to ride bikes. You could cut that girl entirely
• 53:56
  out of this. Movie and it would actually
• 53:58
  improve the movie quite a lot. Totally.
• 54:00
  I completely stand by that and. Also as well.
• 54:02
  Like who? Are they kidding to even?
• 54:06
  Suggest that there's like a bit of sexual tension between her
• 54:08
  and Robin because there's there's no yeah, they're they're
• 54:12
  like I buy. Them competing over like the
• 54:15
  Wayne inheritance, Yeah, like who's which gay is going to get
• 54:19
  the money, but it's fag versus dyke.
• 54:23
  Yeah, it totally is. Yeah, that's the only reason why
• 54:27
  that bossy little bottoms angry, because there's someone else in
• 54:30
  town that might get some of the the earnings.
• 54:33
  He's such a bratty little bottom.
• 54:36
  Such a brat. Yeah, that's the other.
• 54:38
  Attention in this movie. Is that Robin wants to be his
• 54:40
  own man and Bruce doesn't trust him.
• 54:43
  And there's this Well, they're trying.
• 54:45
  They don't. Trust each other.
• 54:47
  This is what I'm saying. They are, they have been in a
• 54:49
  long term relationship and they're now opening it up and
• 54:53
  they're relearning their boundaries about polyamory.
• 54:56
  And then obviously Poison Ivy comes into the mix and they get
• 54:59
  jealous because they haven't really worked out how it's going
• 55:01
  to work when someone else comes into it.
• 55:02
  Yeah, they had rules about men. But they didn't know what to do
• 55:05
  when they met a woman. Exactly.
• 55:07
  It's changed. Everything.
• 55:10
  Batman and Robin track Ivy to her bath house.
• 55:14
  There's a showdown in the bath house.
• 55:16
  Robin's getting choked out, Batman's tangled up in some
• 55:19
  vines. And then Batgirl arrives and
• 55:21
  there's a feminist showdown because obviously then that's
• 55:24
  where the fight needed to. Happen.
• 55:26
  And then that's when we get the real sense that old Daikon, a
• 55:29
  bike is a feminist because she's just kind of like using your
• 55:32
  feminine Wiles. Why don't you read a book,
• 55:35
  sister? That old hat went out long.
• 55:37
  Ago. Meanwhile, you've just got like,
• 55:40
  poison. Ivy just being like, yeah, I
• 55:42
  love it when Poison Ivy pulls out a.
• 55:44
  Knife and then she gets distracted by her own reflection
• 55:47
  in the knife and she's like checking her lace line, I mean.
• 55:51
  I would have liked to have seen more violence from Poison Ivy,
• 55:55
  but that's just the little she doesn't put up a great fight.
• 55:58
  She's. Got some I like when she like is
• 55:59
  whipping with the vines. That's a good idea, but she gets
• 56:03
  one kicked and she gets kicked into her own throne, her own
• 56:06
  bed, her own bed and. That is somehow.
• 56:08
  Her defeated and then she goes curses and the plant like.
• 56:13
  Folds up on her and. That's that's yadda yadda yadda
• 56:17
  yadda. Yadda, feminism.
• 56:18
  Yeah, yeah, that's them going. Look, we've only got Arnold
• 56:22
  Schwarzenegger for five more hours.
• 56:24
  We need to film his scene because he's the one that's the
• 56:27
  big draw here. Fuck Uma Thurman.
• 56:29
  So then all three of. Them go to the Gotham
• 56:34
  Observatory because Mr. Freeze has turned the observatory into
• 56:39
  a giant Freeze laser. Using Freeze diamonds to freeze
• 56:44
  all of Gotham. Let's get some.
• 56:47
  Ice I'm not sure I'd want to live in Gotham.
• 56:51
  I think it might. Be a bad place to live just.
• 56:55
  But you do get all those nice vintage cars it's stuck in.
• 56:59
  It it's like like 40s yeah, yeah, but a lot.
• 57:02
  Of stuff goes on. There, doesn't it?
• 57:03
  I'm not sure it's well, maybe it is worth it just for.
• 57:05
  Style because it's like it gives you neon, but it also gives you
• 57:10
  art deco 40s UV paint, doesn't it?
• 57:14
  A. Gang with UV paint?
• 57:15
  Yeah, there's the hockey gang. Yeah.
• 57:18
  Does Poison Ivy get a gang? No.
• 57:20
  Well, that's the other thing. She's like Catwoman, other than
• 57:23
  like Bane. She just does it by herself.
• 57:25
  She doesn't need. That's kind of good.
• 57:26
  Yeah, she doesn't. I wouldn't.
• 57:27
  I wouldn't have minded if she'd done.
• 57:28
  Like a Last of Us, sort of like fungal infection.
• 57:31
  And she had like an army. Now that would be with a reboot.
• 57:35
  Poison Ivy and have her like controlling the fungus that
• 57:38
  would be if you wanted to go down a darker, like more
• 57:41
  sinister Poison Ivy, that would be the because isn't she isn't
• 57:45
  she lesbian lovers with Harley Quinn?
• 57:48
  Yeah, Harley Quinn. Yeah.
• 57:50
  I mean, she's just, she's just the girl.
• 57:52
  She is the IT girl. She's so fab.
• 57:54
  I don't want to criticize. Poison Ivy in this movie because
• 57:56
  I actually wouldn't change anything, but like, if they
• 57:58
  wanted to make a better movie here, you'd have like the plants
• 58:03
  slowly making her crazier and crazier.
• 58:06
  Oh, OK, so she's slowly twisting her.
• 58:08
  Mind and. So she's like kind of torn and
• 58:10
  she's like a bit of a tragic anti hero because she wants, you
• 58:14
  know, I think her plans are she's linking.
• 58:17
  Yeah. And I.
• 58:17
  Think her plans are good? And so she likes is becoming
• 58:21
  more and more possessed by them, but also compromised.
• 58:25
  And she's like trying to create a utopia.
• 58:28
  But yeah, I think there could be something really fun with that.
• 58:31
  I love how you pitch the. Poison Ivy movie there Because
• 58:34
  that is like way deeper than what's presented.
• 58:36
  It's just like, hey, suddenly I'm a drag.
• 58:38
  Queen what if women sexy feminism plus to sell their
• 58:44
  seeds all over? My face sometime.
• 58:49
  Maybe you could finger my soil? Bed.
• 58:52
  Oh, not. Soil bed.
• 58:54
  Oh, that just made me sprout. I can.
• 58:58
  See the SAP up and out of you from here.
• 59:01
  What is it, Troy? Sivan says I bloom for you.
• 59:07
  While talking about rosebuds, I can start yours from over here.
• 59:16
  OK, so we've got a showdown now at the Observatory.
• 59:19
  Gotham's been frozen. I love the freezing effect.
• 59:22
  Actually, it looks good. I'm spunked on you.
• 59:25
  Yeah. Apparently it took them.
• 59:27
  Six months to figure out how to do that.
• 59:29
  It was like a really difficult effect to achieve and they had
• 59:31
  to do the do loads of mannequins that looked like cast people and
• 59:36
  like freeze them into. Set we got.
• 59:38
  You totally if you were. Chris O'Donnell, You'd keep,
• 59:41
  you'd want your frozen. Yes.
• 59:43
  I'd be like, give me my frozen mannequin.
• 59:45
  Yeah, that'd be great. Really cool.
• 59:48
  It's another example of like, production design in this movie.
• 59:52
  Yeah. And also how they just spunked
• 59:53
  so. Much money on this film.
• 59:55
  What if you put some of it into the writing?
• 59:57
  No, the heroes. Disabled Mr. Freeze's freezing
• 1:00:01
  ray and they used the power of the sun to melt everyone.
• 1:00:04
  And Batman reveals to Freeze that Ivy betrayed him.
• 1:00:08
  She was lying about his wife being dead because Batman
• 1:00:10
  managed to save her. And then Freeze gives Batman the
• 1:00:14
  cure for Alfred's disease. But again, it's very like.
• 1:00:18
  Rich people for them just funky money and resources to like help
• 1:00:22
  save one of their loved ones rather than.
• 1:00:25
  But that brings it back to what I hate about Batman earlier when
• 1:00:28
  Poison Ivy has this plan to kind of like restore the planet and
• 1:00:31
  he's like, nice try, I'm here. We're donating to our botanical
• 1:00:35
  gardens. It's just like giving fucking
• 1:00:37
  like rich billionaire bastard. Yeah, yeah, you're so right.
• 1:00:41
  But Alfred is. Cured Bruce, Dick and Barbara
• 1:00:44
  agree to fight crime. Bruce, Dick and Barbara sounds
• 1:00:47
  like a porno. As well.
• 1:00:50
  And the film ends with Bat the Bat family running towards the
• 1:00:54
  camera heroically. They were really pinning on this
• 1:00:56
  being a. Thing, weren't they?
• 1:00:58
  Yeah. Oh, and then you've got.
• 1:00:59
  A shot of Poison Ivy in the Arkham Asylum.
• 1:01:02
  She's crazy now why is she crazy?
• 1:01:05
  And then why is she sharing a cell with him and.
• 1:01:07
  Then, but then it does this. This takes a really dark turn
• 1:01:09
  because he's basically in his suit and he's like, I'm going to
• 1:01:12
  make your life hell yeah. It's gets very rapey.
• 1:01:15
  Yeah. So basically he's like.
• 1:01:17
  Beat her up. Yeah, poor poison Ivy's in.
• 1:01:20
  The cell, she's lost her mind. It's bury the, it's bury the
• 1:01:25
  craft as well. It's like, oh, well, now she's
• 1:01:27
  crazy. But also you see what I would
• 1:01:29
  have done. Is I would have had her just
• 1:01:31
  like like, you know, fingering a crack.
• 1:01:35
  I I just. Giggled as I said that.
• 1:01:38
  You know, like. A little, a little shoot.
• 1:01:40
  Puppy through the crack. You know, just like, just to
• 1:01:43
  remind these people who I am. Yeah.
• 1:01:45
  Like Jennifer's body? Yeah, which is like a fun
• 1:01:47
  inversion of that because she also ends in an asylum, but
• 1:01:50
  she's like, got powers. Yeah, I'd like exactly.
• 1:01:54
  I mean it's. It's kind of film where I I
• 1:01:56
  watched at the end of the credits hoping there would be
• 1:01:58
  like a little Poison Ivy something, but there was.
• 1:02:01
  Of course there wasn't. I know the DC Universe has.
• 1:02:04
  Taken gone down like everything's dark and serious
• 1:02:07
  it's going to be a while before this happens, but you could
• 1:02:09
  imagine a world where they when they get back to fun that Uma
• 1:02:13
  gets a cameo as an older Poison Ivy Well like and like you get
• 1:02:17
  Michelle Pfeiffer and you get Uma and even like Margot Robbie
• 1:02:20
  and you could imagine the three of them in some kind of role
• 1:02:24
  that would be so cool. This is the thing that I still.
• 1:02:26
  Don't think has happened in these kind of movies and I I am
• 1:02:30
  craving for one of these sex pot villains to be portrayed by an
• 1:02:35
  older woman and give it the yeah, the kind of the way that
• 1:02:39
  the Joker was done in the Batman The Dark Knight film with what's
• 1:02:43
  his name, you know, just like a kind of what's his name is dead
• 1:02:47
  Australian Heath Ledger. Heath Ledger.
• 1:02:49
  But just give it. Like the real sinister darkness
• 1:02:52
  because I think audiences are ready for it.
• 1:02:54
  Like I think I've mentioned it before in the podcast, there's
• 1:02:56
  been like rumours and I think people just make them up on the
• 1:02:58
  Internet. But like about like a one point
• 1:03:01
  share was in talks about being a Catwoman, but like a deformed,
• 1:03:05
  like darker kind of Catwoman. I just think it'd be great to
• 1:03:09
  get like one of these, these actors that are so known for
• 1:03:13
  portraying the beautiful. And like, we've obviously seen
• 1:03:16
  Sharon Stone in that woman being like, oh, you know, fighting
• 1:03:19
  youth but just not fighting it anymore, but just being, like,
• 1:03:23
  evil. Yeah.
• 1:03:25
  And like, I'm trying to think of a woman.
• 1:03:26
  Who's that kind of character ever, actually?
• 1:03:29
  And I just think it would just be fucking great.
• 1:03:31
  And it's not about their venom doesn't come from the fact that
• 1:03:34
  they've lost their beauty or they no longer have their sexual
• 1:03:37
  powers. It just, it isn't a factor in
• 1:03:40
  their motive. They're just evil because
• 1:03:43
  they're evil and. They're just fucking evil.
• 1:03:44
  But but. They also maybe have that
• 1:03:47
  intelligence of not being a CIS man where it's all butchy,
• 1:03:49
  butchy pride. Yeah.
• 1:03:51
  And so therefore there's kind of a more manipulative.
• 1:03:54
  I mean, I think I I just think something like that would be a
• 1:03:57
  game changer. I'm honestly really racking my.
• 1:03:59
  Brain right now to try and think of a woman, a female villain,
• 1:04:03
  like a high profile female villain who who likes sexuality
• 1:04:06
  is not a factor at all. That's shit, isn't it?
• 1:04:10
  Isn't that fucking? Terrible that I can't think of
• 1:04:13
  anyone. I mean, I know my brain is full.
• 1:04:15
  Of camp movies and that's is what they do but like there must
• 1:04:19
  be I can't think of anything if any listeners.
• 1:04:22
  Can think of any I guess you've got it's different.
• 1:04:25
  But like in The Hunger Games, say, Julianne Moore comes the
• 1:04:28
  villain. Yeah, she's never sexy, isn't
• 1:04:32
  her thing. She's kind of an authoritarian,
• 1:04:34
  I guess. Yeah, that's true.
• 1:04:35
  Actually, I was going to say, yeah, the aesthetic is still
• 1:04:38
  important there. Yeah, but it's still like.
• 1:04:42
  But it's not that like deranged. I'm trying to think of like a
• 1:04:45
  lady psycho basically isn't hot. I think I would just, I would
• 1:04:48
  love to see that where. It's just and like, where?
• 1:04:50
  Like, it's like a real sense of danger around them, a real sense
• 1:04:54
  of violence and like mania. Yeah.
• 1:04:57
  And just danger around them. Oh, wow.
• 1:04:59
  OK, well, that's something to as soon as we start recording this,
• 1:05:03
  I'm going to think. Of a few I'm sure.
• 1:05:05
  Slot them in Yeah here if you can.
• 1:05:07
  Oh, why don't you slot them in? Oh wow.
• 1:05:11
  OK, well. So we've got to the end of
• 1:05:13
  Batman and Robin. What else is there to say?
• 1:05:16
  If I had to like sum up my thoughts on this movie, yes, go
• 1:05:19
  on. It would be like pure joy at so
• 1:05:24
  much of it. And then I'm also, there's also
• 1:05:27
  so much of it that I hate because it feels like I'm
• 1:05:29
  watching a toy commercial. And I feel like I'm constantly
• 1:05:33
  shifting focus between unbridled queer joy and you're like, how
• 1:05:37
  did this get made on this scale? How am I watching this?
• 1:05:40
  It is so camp and so funny and so stupid.
• 1:05:43
  And then you're like, oh, I'm watching it because it's to sell
• 1:05:46
  a Mr. Freeze freeze gun. Yeah.
• 1:05:49
  And it's clearly both at the same time.
• 1:05:51
  And it's like the capitalism comes in and ruins it, and then
• 1:05:55
  the queer joy comes back in. You're like, Oh my God, I'm so
• 1:05:57
  happy again. And then you're back to.
• 1:06:00
  It's so such a weird ride in that way.
• 1:06:02
  Yeah. Because I was thinking about
• 1:06:03
  this because on the gate trim. We, we recently talked about
• 1:06:07
  Masters of the Universe, which is film based off of a huge
• 1:06:11
  brand and toys. And I was thinking about that.
• 1:06:13
  They do feel different, don't they?
• 1:06:15
  Because I still really enjoyed Masters of the Universe by just
• 1:06:18
  how terrible it was, and I kind of got campiness out of that.
• 1:06:21
  But it's way more shallow than this movie.
• 1:06:25
  Yeah, you're right. There are like, although it's
• 1:06:28
  dumb, there is something about it that isn't.
• 1:06:32
  And it seems really like kind of purposefully scamp and silly.
• 1:06:36
  Well, it's also got like 10 times.
• 1:06:38
  The budget, right. So that all shines through in
• 1:06:41
  terms of the production design, which we've talked about a lot
• 1:06:44
  already. But there'll be fun.
• 1:06:46
  I guess the fun the characters are.
• 1:06:48
  Having there's lots of fun this movie also does.
• 1:06:50
  Try and have themes. It doesn't do a good job.
• 1:06:54
  It probably shouldn't have tried to have themes, but it does try.
• 1:06:58
  It's like trying to do something about family, trust, letting
• 1:07:02
  people grow and leave the environment.
• 1:07:07
  Environment, disease, diamonds but.
• 1:07:13
  Yeah, what makes it so bad? Is that it is It does try and do
• 1:07:17
  some things, which because it has attempted, you can see how
• 1:07:21
  far it fails it. Yeah, actually reaching them.
• 1:07:23
  Yeah. It's an interesting camp movie
• 1:07:26
  also because normally camp is split either between
• 1:07:29
  unintentional camp. You're like, this is so bad and
• 1:07:33
  I can't stop watching it because I'm just obsessed with how over
• 1:07:36
  the top and bad this is. Yeah.
• 1:07:37
  Mommy dearest showgirls, etcetera.
• 1:07:39
  And then you've got like your Jennifer's Body, which is like,
• 1:07:42
  this is made for the gays. I'm looking at you straight in
• 1:07:45
  the eye and I'm like, I know exactly what I'm doing and I'm
• 1:07:48
  going to give you everything that you want.
• 1:07:50
  This movie knows it's camp, but it's still also a really bad
• 1:07:54
  movie. Even though it's trying to do
• 1:07:56
  camp, it does camp badly and that's what makes it camp.
• 1:07:59
  Yes, I agree. I agree.
• 1:08:00
  And also. As well, it's like it's queer
• 1:08:03
  coded because there are, as we even just spoke, there's like
• 1:08:06
  the Marlena Dietrich, there's the there were like really clear
• 1:08:11
  aspects of the way the film has been made from the set design,
• 1:08:14
  the costume. But then there's also loads of
• 1:08:16
  like accidental stuff as well. For me, I'm kind of it's a lot
• 1:08:19
  of the stuff I really enjoy is the stuff that like it feels
• 1:08:21
  like, how have they got this past all of the studio heads?
• 1:08:25
  Like because I don't think the straight studio bosses are
• 1:08:30
  digging a Batman and Robin. Like, you know, no, like gang
• 1:08:34
  bang. Vibe and I just.
• 1:08:35
  Think the fact that he's been able to sneak all of this in.
• 1:08:39
  I mean, Elle Macpherson is just a beard.
• 1:08:42
  She is just a beard in this film.
• 1:08:45
  We didn't even talk about Elle. MacPherson I mean Batman films
• 1:08:50
  are like. Notable for just shoving a hot
• 1:08:53
  woman in to be Bruce Wayne's girlfriend.
• 1:08:55
  You know Jerry Hall? Yeah, Kim.
• 1:08:57
  Basinger, Nicole Kidman, Elle McPherson is nothing.
• 1:09:03
  Yeah, like she's like 2 lines. Also there's.
• 1:09:07
  That scene where she's like, are you going to marry me or not?
• 1:09:09
  We've been together for a year. I'm not going to wait forever.
• 1:09:13
  She's just not in the movie again.
• 1:09:16
  That's it. And also but then on the the
• 1:09:18
  press. Conference thing we're we're
• 1:09:20
  recklessly in love. She's just talking the talk to
• 1:09:22
  cover. But again, it's like, you know,
• 1:09:24
  are these studio bosses just going well, that's his woman
• 1:09:27
  tick when we were just like, well, clearly they don't have
• 1:09:30
  no, it feels very like. We've got a checklist of things
• 1:09:34
  we have to include in this movie.
• 1:09:35
  Three people at least need to fall into vats and become
• 1:09:38
  villains. Tick, tick.
• 1:09:41
  Tick. We need a superhero origin story
• 1:09:43
  with dead parents, Tick. Some feminism, tick, but not too
• 1:09:47
  much. No, no, no, no.
• 1:09:48
  Just. Wave at it, yeah.
• 1:09:50
  Hot girlfriend. Lots of bat vehicles.
• 1:09:54
  We need a bat plane, car, motorcycle and one that goes on
• 1:09:59
  skates. Yes.
• 1:10:02
  And. Yeah, Action figures with moving
• 1:10:05
  arms. Yeah, I think I maybe had a Bane
• 1:10:07
  action figure at one point in my life.
• 1:10:09
  I think he had like some kind of pump action on his back and it
• 1:10:11
  moved pumping up. Yeah.
• 1:10:13
  And you just pumped him in the. Back and then his arms went
• 1:10:16
  crazy. It's funny because Bane's meant
• 1:10:19
  to be like. Because he's Tom Hardy plays
• 1:10:21
  him, doesn't he? And he's the one.
• 1:10:23
  And isn't he meant to be, like, one of the most, like,
• 1:10:25
  physically strong and like mentally intelligent villains?
• 1:10:29
  Yeah. It's a real disservice to the.
• 1:10:31
  Comics, the character, everything.
• 1:10:34
  Like, I mean, the other thing this movie forgets is that
• 1:10:36
  Batman is the world's greatest detective.
• 1:10:38
  Oh well, yeah, that you clearly don't know that.
• 1:10:40
  In this, no, you don't know that, but Bane is supposed to.
• 1:10:43
  Be on a match with him intellectually and he's like a
• 1:10:45
  genius. Well, who cares?
• 1:10:47
  He's under the rule of. Poison Ivy, Yeah, that would
• 1:10:51
  even. Work too.
• 1:10:51
  Like if he'd been like a genius and she corrupted him, sure she
• 1:10:55
  didn't need to. No, that's her.
• 1:10:56
  Power, though, yeah, there's so much she I mean, you know, on
• 1:10:59
  the surface level, you just think it's all because of her
• 1:11:01
  sexuality and her ceremonies. Also, it's just not like she's
• 1:11:04
  just. I love the shots of Bane when
• 1:11:07
  he's. Like there's a shot of them
• 1:11:09
  getting off a plane and he's in like a suit and there's another
• 1:11:13
  shot of him like with a hat and trench coat in disguise.
• 1:11:16
  I love, I love him in disguise. It's so cute.
• 1:11:21
  And especially now that I know he's AT boy, it's so cute.
• 1:11:25
  They are so cute. So the way they just ride.
• 1:11:26
  Around together, aren't they? Yeah, if you can't tell
• 1:11:29
  listeners. It's a really fun movie to
• 1:11:32
  watch. Yeah, I know.
• 1:11:33
  I think it crossed over. It's that thing as well.
• 1:11:36
  It's got the nostalgic thing that I always like when I can
• 1:11:39
  sort of go back to a younger me and enjoy it.
• 1:11:41
  But then the reading I have as an Atole, this is so deeper and
• 1:11:46
  weirder now than I did as a kid because it's just, it's just
• 1:11:50
  visually so fun, isn't it? Absolutely.
• 1:11:52
  Like you said, it could easily be a musical.
• 1:11:54
  It's like a big stage show. It's just there's always
• 1:11:56
  something to look at. There's always like a fun
• 1:11:59
  action. There's like a bit of campy fun
• 1:12:01
  here. Then there's a bit of a fight.
• 1:12:03
  I mean, that's probably one thing that's actually lacking in
• 1:12:05
  it, is there's not really any great fight sequences.
• 1:12:09
  I mean, that's not the only thing lacking.
• 1:12:11
  In this movie, but for an action.
• 1:12:13
  Movie, you're right, they're not.
• 1:12:15
  No, it's very. It's it feels like the 60s show
• 1:12:19
  in that it's like very POW, which again, I don't kind of
• 1:12:23
  hate. I even.
• 1:12:24
  Had some of the sound effects you use, you hear like a wing,
• 1:12:27
  Yeah, it's got like. Especially.
• 1:12:29
  That first scene where they're in the.
• 1:12:31
  Where they go into the space, where they go into the penis,
• 1:12:34
  rocket into space, It's just very like slapstick fight.
• 1:12:38
  Yeah, there's a million things we could change, but I would
• 1:12:41
  kind of say don't change anything.
• 1:12:43
  I don't think we should change anything.
• 1:12:44
  Yeah, I'm glad. I'm really glad this.
• 1:12:46
  Movie exists just how it is, but it also just shows that you can
• 1:12:50
  have. Terrible movies that are really
• 1:12:52
  watchable as well. Like this has a lot of rewatch
• 1:12:55
  appeal as well, Yeah, especially compared to like the later.
• 1:12:58
  Spate of Marvel movies which are just like, yeah, and why is
• 1:13:02
  that? Because they're the same thing.
• 1:13:03
  They're like, they throw a ton of money at them, They throw a
• 1:13:06
  ton of celebrities at them. They've found a formula, but
• 1:13:10
  this formula? Is safe.
• 1:13:12
  And so there's no yeah, there's no chance for like a big flaming
• 1:13:17
  faggot who slept with 20,000 men to put a big flaming gaze stamp
• 1:13:21
  on it. Yeah, you're right.
• 1:13:23
  They've worked out the big. The big.
• 1:13:25
  Studios have worked out like how to We'll do irony just enough.
• 1:13:29
  In just these ways, we'll do like a winky nod, we'll be a
• 1:13:34
  little bit self referential so that people know we're in on the
• 1:13:36
  joke, but for the most part we're just going to do exactly
• 1:13:40
  like what we know has worked. So yeah, bring back like big
• 1:13:44
  stupid movies that are destined to fail.
• 1:13:49
  I. Mean we did get Madam Webb
• 1:13:50
  quite. Recently, so there is still bad
• 1:13:55
  movies are still getting made. OK, well should we?
• 1:13:59
  Yeah, I think we've we should rate this.
• 1:14:00
  Movie. It's type.
• 1:14:02
  Spring has sprung. OK, let's rate this movie.
• 1:14:06
  Let's. Give it out of 10 Merrells for
• 1:14:09
  the quality of the movie, I'm Julia Child.
• 1:14:19
  So I think I. Have to give like 8 or 9
• 1:14:22
  Merrill's to Uma Thurman. And is that just because you
• 1:14:25
  like the sort of the two? D yeah, way she represents.
• 1:14:28
  I think she's doing a great job at doing a drag.
• 1:14:30
  Queen Yeah, OK, fine. Yeah, because it's.
• 1:14:33
  It's not a nuanced performance. No, but with what she's given,
• 1:14:37
  she does a very good job. Yeah, totally.
• 1:14:40
  Yeah, totally. I hear that, yeah.
• 1:14:44
  I'm not going to give it 0. Even though it's it is a the
• 1:14:48
  movie is bad enough I think to get 0 Merrills.
• 1:14:50
  I'm going to give it I think like a 2 because I really want
• 1:14:55
  to give some love to the production design, which I think
• 1:14:58
  is just like a beautiful example of what Hollywood can do with
• 1:15:03
  money and sets and like creativity.
• 1:15:07
  Yeah. And it's.
• 1:15:08
  Yeah, because it's like. The magic of movies.
• 1:15:10
  Yeah, it's feels. Movie magic.
• 1:15:11
  Definitely, I think. I agree with you.
• 1:15:15
  I don't think the design is quite up there with the Tim
• 1:15:19
  Burton correct, which I just think, I think we've, I think
• 1:15:22
  stuff has got a little bit sloppier.
• 1:15:24
  I don't know if the same people have stayed on.
• 1:15:27
  It feels it doesn't feel as much as like a beautiful world and it
• 1:15:32
  doesn't. It feels like he's got lots of
• 1:15:34
  really brilliant separate departments, but none of them
• 1:15:36
  have had a meeting together. You're right, you're right.
• 1:15:39
  It's like we've. Been given.
• 1:15:40
  It's like the doctor freeze. People have been given $1
• 1:15:42
  million to make this costume. We're going to make ours look
• 1:15:45
  really fucking great. Well, fuck you because Sheena
• 1:15:47
  sponsoring our layer. So we're going to do this.
• 1:15:50
  Meanwhile, we're just going to have like, you know, Batman
• 1:15:53
  looking like really non core and just like it's an Ivy Sheen
• 1:15:56
  layer, but. But again, it is.
• 1:15:59
  Magical and it's I and I love I I love it when you've got like
• 1:16:03
  acrobatics and people like that that are part of like gangs and
• 1:16:06
  they're flipping and stuff because it's like why not yeah
• 1:16:09
  the jungle scene where they're selling the.
• 1:16:11
  The women and and there's all those people swinging on vines.
• 1:16:14
  Yeah, I just think it it brings you back to.
• 1:16:16
  Those, like, olden and like musicals.
• 1:16:19
  Yeah. And it, I just think it's a
• 1:16:20
  really interesting way of portraying like, the superhero
• 1:16:22
  world, that it doesn't all have to be like rugged real.
• 1:16:25
  I think it's fantasy and it should be.
• 1:16:27
  So I think it's gorgeous. I think, I think I'm going to
• 1:16:29
  give it one. Yeah, I'm going to give.
• 1:16:33
  It one that's fair because it's fair, but it's a lot of money to
• 1:16:37
  spend on a film and and like absolutely one other production.
• 1:16:43
  Design thing I wanted to shout out, just actually, while I
• 1:16:45
  think of it, is I think the observatory, it might be the
• 1:16:47
  observatory is being held up by like a really ripped man.
• 1:16:51
  I was here. I didn't.
• 1:16:52
  Yeah. Or like one of the.
• 1:16:53
  Buildings in Gotham. Like you get a shot of Gotham
• 1:16:56
  City and it's just this like the torso of the most ripped man
• 1:17:01
  ever holding a loft, like the building.
• 1:17:04
  It's like. And again, who signed that off
• 1:17:06
  exactly? It's.
• 1:17:07
  Amazing. It's amazing.
• 1:17:08
  Also, so many times in this movie they're suddenly above
• 1:17:12
  like the world's highest drop. She's on her motorcycle race and
• 1:17:17
  then she nearly goes off a Cliff.
• 1:17:19
  Like the Batmobile driving nearly goes off a Cliff.
• 1:17:24
  Poison Ivy breaking out. With the asylum off a Cliff,
• 1:17:29
  yeah. How are this this many cliffs in
• 1:17:32
  in Gotham? How does anyone get around?
• 1:17:35
  I just think it's a really hard place to live.
• 1:17:37
  Isn't it but just? Because it doesn't.
• 1:17:41
  Score very highly as a Merrill. How about Elizas does it?
• 1:17:47
  Unlock queer joy, ongoing legacy, stupid fun underdog flop
• 1:17:53
  vibes. It's it's.
• 1:17:55
  It is. So Camp, and it is the most
• 1:17:57
  glorious definition of camp because as we said, because
• 1:18:00
  queer people have managed to sneak in all of this fucking gay
• 1:18:04
  shit in a massive, massive film and not even do it in a
• 1:18:08
  particularly subtle way. No, I knew from the get go when
• 1:18:11
  I rewatched this movie with the close-ups of ass, Dick, ass that
• 1:18:16
  this was. You can't start a film like
• 1:18:18
  that. And we talked about like the
• 1:18:20
  male gaze. That was the gay gaze from the
• 1:18:23
  get go. Oh, you mean the gaze or the
• 1:18:24
  gaze? 1010s. 10s, tens across the
• 1:18:30
  board. It's, I mean, there's nothing
• 1:18:33
  else for it, for this. One, it's a 10.
• 1:18:35
  It's 10 Lizers I. Literally.
• 1:18:39
  Can't explain how. Much I enjoyed this movie.
• 1:18:42
  It was so much fun. Has it been lost a bit?
• 1:18:45
  Has it been like, is it on people's radars as much anymore?
• 1:18:48
  I think it. You know what I think?
• 1:18:50
  That it is like, obviously a lot of people saw it at the time.
• 1:18:53
  It made $250 million at the box office.
• 1:18:55
  So that's like a big movie made a lot of gays or those kids.
• 1:18:59
  Watching Turn Gay made a lot of drag Queens, yeah.
• 1:19:02
  I think it goes around like the bad movie circuit too.
• 1:19:05
  I think you get midnight screenings of this.
• 1:19:07
  I would love to host midnight screening of this movie.
• 1:19:10
  Yeah, I feel like it. This is one of those.
• 1:19:12
  Ones that like, you know, show girls does the rounds, but I
• 1:19:15
  this isn't the kind of one that would be so fun, but you.
• 1:19:18
  Need to dress up? You need to.
• 1:19:20
  Dress up as this everyone comes as either a.
• 1:19:23
  Hockey player or a gorilla? Yeah, it's a camp.
• 1:19:29
  It's a. Certified Camp Classic.
• 1:19:31
  What a delight. What?
• 1:19:32
  What a joy. Why don't we?
• 1:19:34
  Leave you with this quote. From Poison Ivy when she's
• 1:19:38
  seducing Robin. Just really, really channel it
• 1:19:41
  now. I feel like you've done a great
• 1:19:42
  impression of her, but youth does have its advantages.
• 1:19:46
  Endurance, stamina. Forget the geriatric bat, come
• 1:19:51
  join me. My garden needs tending round
• 1:19:57
  the floors. Round of thought that was
• 1:19:58
  sensational yeah, let's let's. Get the tending that.
• 1:20:02
  Bush of yours, Crystal. Get the weed wagger.
• 1:20:09
  Thank you for being here. If you enjoyed this episode,
• 1:20:12
  you're gay. Yeah, we'll be back in two more
• 1:20:17
  weeks with another camp classic. Goodbye, get away.
• 1:20:23
  From her, you bitch. Classic.
• 1:20:28
  He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching
• 1:20:31
  spiders, right? Before she died, no.
• 1:20:38
  You thought you can't prostitute.
• 1:20:39
  You're a dog. I used to love doggy chow.
• 1:20:44
  I used to love doggy chow too. We have to.
• 1:20:47
  Stop scoring movies so high. I feel like, well, we need to
• 1:20:51
  watch some like straight shit we might.
• 1:20:52
  Do.