Latest / The Art of Love With Lucia / Episode 676: 7 Ways To MAKE Your Ex Reach Out First

Transcript

Episode 676: 7 Ways To MAKE Your Ex Reach Out First · The Art of Love With Lucia

• 0:01
  If you were dumped and want your ex back, the number one question
• 0:04
  you have is whether you'll ever hear from them again.
• 0:07
  And I know it may seem impossible, like you'll never
• 0:11
  hear from them, but I have good news for you.
• 0:14
  Not only is it possible, it's probable.
• 0:17
  How? Stay tuned and you'll find out.
• 0:20
  Hi, this is Lucia with the Art of Love.
• 0:22
  I'm a dating and relationship expert specializing in helping
• 0:25
  you get your ex back or to get over your ex.
• 0:27
  And welcome back my beautiful no contact army.
• 0:30
  If you have downloaded my app Silencio to help you stay in no
• 0:33
  contact, I really, really appreciate if you would give it
• 0:37
  either a review or a rating in the App Store or in Google Play.
• 0:43
  And if you too would like to join our beautiful no contact
• 0:46
  army, all you have to do is hit the subscribe button and the
• 0:50
  bell notification and you're in. And to read our manual, go to
• 0:54
  nocontactsecrets.com where you can read 2 free chapters before
• 0:58
  you purchase the book. OK, so you want your ex to reach
• 1:04
  out first. You want to hear from them.
• 1:06
  And in order to do that, you need to create the right
• 1:08
  environment in order to motivate them to want to reach out to you
• 1:12
  even though they broke up with you.
• 1:15
  And you may feel powerless in this moment, but you know what?
• 1:19
  You have more power than you think.
• 1:22
  You just have to make sure that you don't give your power away.
• 1:26
  You need to put yourself in a position where they want to
• 1:29
  reach out and pursue you. You will never get them back by
• 1:33
  trying to talk them into coming back, so save your breath.
• 1:37
  So this may seem obvious, but in order for them to reach out
• 1:41
  first, you have to not be reaching out to them.
• 1:45
  If you're reaching out to them, why would they reach out to you,
• 1:48
  right? Which means you have to get into
• 1:51
  no contact and stay there, no matter how hard it is.
• 1:56
  And I know it's super difficult if you have an anxious
• 2:00
  attachment style. And obviously if you're secure
• 2:05
  or you're an avoidant, you have no problem staying in no
• 2:08
  contact. In fact, avoidance love no
• 2:11
  contact. So the first thing you have to
• 2:13
  make sure you do is that you are not reaching out to them for any
• 2:18
  reason whatsoever. But you know what?
• 2:21
  You actually don't have to make your ex reach out first, which I
• 2:25
  know goes against the title of the video because 90% of people
• 2:30
  will hear from their exes. The question my clients always
• 2:33
  ask is will I hear from my ex? And it's a double edged sword
• 2:38
  because yes you will hear from your ex but it doesn't mean they
• 2:43
  want to get back together. Most of the time.
• 2:45
  XS do not just go away even if they don't want you back.
• 2:50
  I wish they did. They always linger around
• 2:54
  because unfortunately that gives you false hope since they're
• 2:58
  still around and they're like a ghost haunting you.
• 3:02
  XS always seem to pop up in some shape or form.
• 3:05
  Even if they never ever contact you, they're doing something to
• 3:10
  get your attention. That's because their ego does
• 3:13
  not want to think that you're actually never going to speak to
• 3:17
  them again. Even though they broke up with
• 3:19
  you or their curiosity as to why you've been silent.
• 3:23
  Even though they broke up with you again.
• 3:27
  We'll have them looking for crazy excuses to contact you or
• 3:31
  just doing crazy things. So let me put your mind at ease
• 3:36
  that you will hear from your ex. And I said in my video on the 60
• 3:42
  day no contact rule that most people will hear from their ex
• 3:46
  within 45 to 60 days of no contact.
• 3:51
  And I'll put the link to that video in the upper right hand
• 3:53
  corner. But sometimes it takes longer,
• 3:55
  sometimes it takes months and months.
• 3:58
  But at some point somehow, somewhere they will pop up.
• 4:03
  Just expect it and don't be surprised.
• 4:06
  And remember, do not pick up the phone when they call if you
• 4:11
  still have their name in your phone, which you shouldn't.
• 4:15
  So when you see that they're calling, you're going to get
• 4:18
  excited and your first instinct, your muscle memory is going to
• 4:22
  make you want to pick up that call.
• 4:24
  Do not do that. Do not do like my recent client
• 4:28
  did. He was getting on a plane, it
• 4:30
  was noisy, he couldn't hear anything.
• 4:32
  He didn't have his Bluetooth in and he saw the number, he saw
• 4:35
  her name. He got excited and even though I
• 4:37
  told him don't answer, he answered and he couldn't hear
• 4:44
  anything. She couldn't hear anything.
• 4:47
  He didn't really know what to do.
• 4:48
  So do not put yourself in that situation because then you're
• 4:52
  going to be wondering, Oh my God, I just broke into a
• 4:53
  contact. Should I call them back?
• 4:55
  What did they say? Did they hear what I have to
• 4:57
  say? You know, if you're going to
• 4:58
  answer for whatever reason, make sure that you can hear that
• 5:02
  you're in an area where you can hear well and they'll be able to
• 5:04
  hear you. Otherwise, you're going to be
• 5:06
  kicking yourself and wondering what the heck to do.
• 5:10
  And then realize, you know what? I never should have answered,
• 5:13
  OK, But just know that you will most likely hear from your ex.
• 5:17
  You're going to get excited. You're going to think, Oh my
• 5:19
  God, they want me back. We don't know that.
• 5:22
  Feelings are not facts. So just calm down, all right,
• 5:27
  And if you are enjoying this so far, please give this video a
• 5:30
  like so that we can you have help the YouTube algorithm to
• 5:35
  recommend it to more people. Thank you.
• 5:38
  OK, so the third way to get your ex to reach out first is to be
• 5:43
  mysterious. Now this will be easier to do if
• 5:47
  they're still watching your stories or posts, post something
• 5:51
  that will get them wondering. Let's say you're going on a
• 5:53
  trip, so you can show yourself at the airport, or you can show
• 5:57
  the hotel and then don't show anything else for the rest of
• 6:01
  the trip. Now, obviously this won't be
• 6:03
  possible for everyone, especially if you have an
• 6:05
  audience that's used to seeing all aspects of your life.
• 6:08
  But that probably doesn't apply to most people listening.
• 6:11
  So if you do this, it's a great way to create mystery because
• 6:15
  they're going to wonder, well, why aren't you showing the whole
• 6:17
  trip? Or if you're going out for the
• 6:20
  evening, why are you just showing one photo or one video
• 6:24
  at the beginning of the evening and then not showing anything
• 6:26
  else when you usually show everything if you're going out
• 6:30
  for the evening? And for the ladies, a way to be
• 6:34
  mysterious, there's the flower trick where you show a bouquet
• 6:38
  of flowers if it's not your birthday or Valentine's and
• 6:42
  they're going to wonder what the flowers are for and who they're
• 6:46
  from. Meanwhile, they could just be
• 6:49
  flowers you bought yourself, and this may prompt them to reach
• 6:52
  out to find out what's going on. And if you've been a good
• 6:56
  soldier, you'll stay in no contact if they don't say
• 7:01
  something significant. But hey, at least they reach
• 7:04
  out, right #4 is to show that you're fully immersing yourself
• 7:09
  in a new project where it's obvious you're very busy with
• 7:13
  that project and you're not thinking about your ex.
• 7:15
  Someone I know, after a breakup, they ended up buying this old
• 7:18
  mansion, which really didn't cost that much because it was
• 7:21
  old and rundown. And they did a renovation.
• 7:26
  And on her stories, she showed herself painting the rooms,
• 7:29
  decorating by buying furniture. You could tell she was totally
• 7:33
  immersed in that project. And now she rents it out for
• 7:35
  video shoots and throws lavish parties.
• 7:39
  And you could tell she was totally into it, had no time to
• 7:42
  think about the X. So this might make your ex
• 7:46
  curious and want to reach out to find out about your new passion.
• 7:51
  Next we have, although I don't agree with this, a thirst trap
• 7:57
  posting a thirst trap. So if you think it's going to
• 8:00
  work, then put yourself in a bikini.
• 8:05
  If you're a girl, not a guy. If you're a guy, a topless photo
• 8:11
  and if you think that's going to get your ex to reach out, OK,
• 8:14
  fine. Again, it doesn't mean you're
• 8:16
  going to get back together, but it may accomplish your goal of
• 8:20
  at least hearing them, especially if you're really
• 8:22
  anxious. Number six, we have my
• 8:26
  meditation to get your power back from your ex and I did a
• 8:30
  whole video on that. I'll put the link in the upper
• 8:32
  right hand corner. And XS can often feel where when
• 8:36
  you're no longer focused on them.
• 8:37
  So by pulling your power back, there's the possibility that
• 8:40
  they'll fill the void and want to reach out.
• 8:44
  And finally, another meditation, the meditation to get your ex to
• 8:49
  text you. And there are a lot of people
• 8:54
  who use this meditation. And if you read the comments
• 8:57
  underneath the video, I will post that up in the upper right
• 9:00
  hand corner on YouTube. You'll see a lot of people who
• 9:03
  did hear from their ex after they did the meditation, so you
• 9:08
  can certainly try that and you might be pleasantly surprised to
• 9:11
  hear from your ex. Now keep in mind that they may
• 9:16
  not reach out to you, but they may reach out to someone who you
• 9:21
  mutually know that you were close to with an excuse.
• 9:25
  So one of my clients heard from the family member of his ex
• 9:29
  because something was going on in the family that she thought
• 9:32
  he might want to know about. Luckily, I already told him to
• 9:35
  make sure that if you heard from his exer, anybody who knows her,
• 9:40
  that he was not to talk about the ex and he was to come across
• 9:43
  as happy and moving on. So even if you never hear from
• 9:49
  your ex again, the fact that you didn't reach out and that they
• 9:53
  heard that you were happy and moving on is going to hurt their
• 9:57
  ego and you'll get your revenge. For those of you who want to
• 10:01
  know if their ex is hurting just as much as they are, they may
• 10:05
  not be hurting now, but if you leave them alone and they see
• 10:09
  that you're actually happy, eventually they will be hurt.
• 10:13
  OK, so now I want to hear from you.
• 10:15
  How long have you been in no contact and which one of these
• 10:18
  will you try? And in the meantime, if you
• 10:21
  would like my help to get your ex back, you can contact me at
• 10:24
  theartoflove.net and we will send you the rates.
• 10:28
  They are not on the website. The direct link is below every
• 10:31
  single video and podcast. If you found this video helpful,
• 10:34
  please like, subscribe, and share.
• 10:37
  If you're listening to this as a podcast, please rate and review
• 10:40
  and find and remember. Love inspires, empowers, uplifts
• 10:43
  and enlightens.