Latest / Blush / Vegan Game Day Food That Will Convert the Meat Eaters

Transcript

Vegan Game Day Food That Will Convert the Meat Eaters · Blush

0:00
We're in the thick of the NBA playoffs right now, and quite
0:03
frankly, I don't really give a shit, but I do give a lot of
0:05
shits about really good food. And I love to host for the
0:09
games, but I like to serve my guests things that are still
0:13
game day appropriate, but a bit healthier, a bit higher in
0:16
protein, a bit higher in fiber, but still so yummy and decadent.
0:21
So let's get into it. OK, here's the deal.
0:28
We're going to make three things.
0:29
One dip, one play on a classic dip and then something sweet.
0:35
So the first thing we're going to do is grab an onion.
0:38
We're going to slice it. You can dice it, you can do
0:40
whatever the fuck you want. It doesn't really matter.
0:42
Let's just do it. I wanted to take things that are
0:47
kind of like classic game day foods and just a make them
0:51
healthier, obviously, and make them vegan, but also maybe like
0:55
put a slightly more interesting spin on them.
0:58
So this is for a play on a spinach artichoke dip, which you
1:04
know, is kind of elite as far as.
1:07
Sports. Snacks goes, you know.
1:10
I mean in my opinion at least. If you disagree, that's fine,
1:15
you can keep it to yourself if you disagree.
1:17
But this bitch loves a nice spinach onion situation and
1:23
hopefully I will not slice off a finger nor a nail.
1:26
The other day I was making food for Sam.
1:29
I actually made her beef tongues, which is a big thing in
1:32
Persian cooking. So it was a nice moment for her
1:35
to become were acquainted with her ancestors and her culture,
1:40
given that she has never been to Iran and.
1:43
She'll probably never go to Iran, so I.
1:48
Mean like I haven't. Even been to Iran in a long.
1:51
Hours time I've. Been to Iran since.
1:53
I was 10 or 11, so you know. Anyway, I sliced off part of my
1:57
finger. Well, not part of my finger,
1:58
sorry. Part of my manicure.
2:00
What? Not my finger, quite frankly.
2:02
I would have rather sliced off part of my finger.
2:05
Just kidding. I.
2:06
Would not have. OK, these are done.
2:07
I'm going to grab the camping stove so we can start sauteing
2:10
and shit. By the way, this is a caraway
2:13
frying pan. I'm obsessed with their stuff.
2:16
Like it's so nonstick. I don't even have to use this,
2:19
but I'm using avocado oil spray. It's so good.
2:22
And I worked out a discount code with them, so I'll make sure to
2:26
put that where I put all the links.
2:29
So if you want to try their stuff, I have a bunch of their
2:31
stuff and I'm literally obsessed with every single thing I have.
2:35
You can actually go back to the, what was it, the scrambled eggs
2:39
episode? I think it was my first time
2:41
using the Caraway frying pan. I could not stop gushing about
2:46
how good it is. So what we're going to do is
2:48
we're just going to saute these onions for a while and then I'm
2:52
going to move it to the stove in the back because I just feel
2:54
like you kind of get the concept.
2:57
But something I did earlier was I roasted some garlic and some
3:01
onions. I just wrapped all the garlic
3:04
hats, like chopped the top off, sprayed the little oil, wrapped
3:08
it in foil individually. And I just chopped up an onion,
3:12
sprayed with some oil, wrapped it in foil, roasted it, and I
3:16
just turned the oven on to Preheat things for all the
3:19
things that we're doing. Yay, yay, yay.
3:23
OK, these are Browning quite nicely, so I'm going to move
3:30
them to the stove in the back and in a little bit I'm going to
3:35
add a bunch of fucking spinach. So let me go ahead and do that
3:39
and I'll see you here in a second, OK?
3:41
I'm so excited about this. First I wanted to do a Buffalo
3:45
something dip, and I do make a really nice Buffalo tofu thing.
3:49
Actually, not to brag, but I made it recently and we had some
3:53
friends over and one of the guys was like, yeah, that's chicken.
3:56
And his fiance was like, no, he was vegan.
3:59
Like she doesn't serve us fucking chicken.
4:01
And he's like, no, no, it's chicken.
4:03
And I was like, no, it's tofu. But.
4:05
Like that's how good it is that someone thought it was chicken.
4:08
Whatever. Like we've all seen a Buffalo
4:10
something dip even made vegan, but I wanted to do just
4:14
something a little more unique, a little more interesting.
4:17
So I had this idea. Garlic bread dip.
4:23
That sounds good, right? So I roasted all this garlic as
4:28
I aforementioned, and now I'm going to try to just like get my
4:34
hands all stinky and get these cloves in a bowl.
4:39
This should be fun, not disgusting at all.
4:42
It's a very. Unpleasant sensation.
4:44
I thought I'd be able to just like, squeeze it out like, oh,
4:48
OK, there we go. I did kind of squeeze it out
4:51
like that, I guess. But now all the skins are every.
4:55
OK, this is a disaster. Don't do this.
4:57
Don't listen to me. Just make a stupid Buffalo dimp,
5:00
OK? No, I really think this.
5:03
Is going to be good. That's just a mess.
5:05
Anyway, so I made this melty cheesy sauce that is actually
5:10
nut free and very high in protein and quite frankly very
5:14
simple to make. But I don't have the ingredients
5:18
in front of me right this second and my hands are occupied doing
5:22
this nasty shit, so you're just going to have to wait a bit.
5:26
Before I can. Tell you what's in it.
5:28
It's really good. I think it's like quite cheesy.
5:32
I really can't explain the sensation, but it's very
5:35
unpleasant. You know, at one time I went
5:38
with my sister-in-law and my niece to, you know, that place.
5:43
Fuck, what's it called? It's like something camp.
5:47
It's like a kids store and they do these events with characters,
5:52
like they'll do events with like Bluey and Peppa Pig and stuff.
5:57
Who, by the way, I always thought her name was Peppa the
6:00
Pig. OK.
6:01
This one is much better. OK.
6:05
It's just it's like the skins keep getting stuck to my sticky
6:09
hands. It's unpleasant.
6:11
Anyway, we went to this Peppa Pig event.
6:14
Yeah. I thought her name was Peppa the
6:16
Pig. No, it's just Peppa.
6:18
I guess. Like, Pig is her last name.
6:20
I don't know. I'm not very sure what goes on.
6:23
In pig world. But yeah, so we went to this
6:27
event and then afterwards you could like, make your own slime
6:30
or whatever. I don't know how much longer I
6:33
can take the sensation. You know what, quick break.
6:36
I'm going to rinse my hands even though they're going to get
6:38
gross again. I just like, I actually can't
6:40
deal with this. And I'm going to give the
6:43
onions, which are insanely loud by the way, a little saute,
6:48
maybe add the spinach and then come back and get all vile with
6:52
my hands again. Stay tuned.
6:54
OK, Honestly I wish I'd put on some kind of gloves because I'm
6:57
really not looking forward to this at all, but here we are.
7:02
Anyway. So after the event, like the
7:05
show thing, then you got to make your own slime and you can make
7:10
it whatever color you want. And my niece loves purple, so we
7:16
picked purple. And my sister-in-law was like,
7:20
hey, can you watch her for like 30 seconds while I go pee?
7:25
And I was like, totally. We're going to be.
7:27
Great, like you. Go do your thing.
7:30
Take your time Mama, like I got you.
7:32
I'm here to support you. She comes back like I'm not even
7:36
joking like Max 45 seconds later my niece and I.
7:41
Are both covered in purple glue. And she was like, what the hell
7:45
happened? I leave her with you for not
7:49
even a. Minute and I come.
7:51
Back and the two of you need to take a full on shower.
7:55
And honestly I feel like it was only like 50 to 75% my fault.
8:03
Basically the guy doing the slime said what color do you
8:06
want? And we said purple.
8:08
And he takes a thing, adds purple color to it and hands it
8:13
to us. And we're like great.
8:15
And then I'm like, hey Niecy girl, I think we can mix it up.
8:19
So we start mixing it up and trying to do things with it.
8:22
And I did think it was odd that it wasn't like slimy the way
8:29
slime is supposed to be. Well it turns out he hadn't yet
8:32
added a second thing that turns glue into slime.
8:36
But like, I'm sorry, I'm not a slime expert.
8:39
Although I actually have been to the slime museum so.
8:43
Maybe I should be a slime expert.
8:46
Like how was I meant to know Sir, that you didn't add this
8:49
bullshit and like everyone acted like.
8:51
We were crazy. I was like.
8:53
It was your job to tell us that there was another.
8:56
Step coming. Before we could put.
8:58
Our hands in it like these are kids with no impulse control and
9:02
an adult. With no impulse control like,
9:04
how were we? Meant to know anyway.
9:07
I don't know. Oh yeah, I guess that's my very
9:10
long winded way of saying that I find it surprising that I'm
9:13
having such issues with this texture, given that I do like
9:17
slimy things and it's not my first.
9:21
It's the skins getting stuck to everything that's really
9:25
triggering me, quite frankly. So maybe next time I'll do a
9:30
garlic confit instead of roasting the bulbs whole.
9:35
That's just where you submerge garlic cloves and oil and roast
9:39
it that way. I think that would have been
9:41
better for me. I'm going to rinse my hands
9:43
again. It's just covered in skins.
9:46
OK, I think it's just one more of these heads.
9:49
Oh, also, I can tell you about this melty cheese sauce.
9:52
So I made a double batch. You can have this recipe, I just
9:57
want to use it for a bunch of stuff.
9:58
So I made a double batch. So I did 2 cups of the Eden
10:02
foods unsweetened soy milk, 1/4 cup of nutritional yeast, 1/2 a
10:09
cup of tapioca starch. That's what makes it get like
10:13
melty and stretchy when it's hot. 6 tablespoons white miso 2
10:19
tablespoons refined coconut oil. You do want this to be refined.
10:23
If you use like virgin or whatever coconut oil it will
10:28
taste coconutty, which is not how I recall cheese tasting.
10:33
But that's neither here nor there.
10:35
Now if you want to do. More of the.
10:37
Refined coconut oil. It will make it taste more like
10:42
cheese because cheese is quite high in saturated fat.
10:45
That's why we're adding it. I just keep it low because
10:47
saturated fat is like pretty bad for you.
10:50
I just find like 2 tablespoons over the span of like 2-3 cups
10:56
is negligible, you know? But in terms of flavor, it just
11:00
adds so much. It's the same with my philosophy
11:03
on using oil and cooking. When I first went vegan, there
11:06
was it was like a weird time in veganism and there were all
11:11
these vegan influencers who talked about like never using
11:16
any oil. And so of course I was
11:18
influenced by that. And here's the thing, like, do
11:21
you save like a little bit? Like I get what they're saying
11:24
in terms of, and this is just the roasted onion just going to
11:28
mix. See this.
11:29
I don't mind so much because I don't have like skins all over
11:32
me. I'm just going to mix these up.
11:34
Oh, I kind of forgot about. Everything on the stove.
11:37
Fuck me. OK.
11:39
Oh, this smells so good. By the way, Ozzy during
11:43
commercial breaks said I wish you could mail the sent to
11:47
people as they're watching. OK, I'm going to throw all this
11:50
shit away, rinse my hands again, check on that guy and then come
11:54
back. Oh, and sorry, there's one
11:57
teaspoon of lactic acid. Let me just round that recipe
12:00
out real quick. Sorry.
12:02
OK, we have all this grossness in here.
12:05
I'm going to take this cheese sauce and we're just going to
12:10
mix this guy up and then we're going to throw it in the oven.
12:14
I'm actually so fucking excited for this.
12:17
Like, it just sounds delicious. Garlic bread dip.
12:24
Yum. When I was little I used to
12:29
think that parsley was garlic because when like at any time I
12:37
had had garlic bread, it had parsley on it and so.
12:42
Like that's like the. Visible thing when you get
12:45
garlic bread, you know, like just like splatterings of green
12:48
parsley. So then I just, just, I mean,
12:51
that sounds reasonable to me, right?
12:53
Or was I really dumb as a kid? I don't know.
12:57
By the way, that was 5 heads of garlic and one big red onion.
13:06
Now usually I would use Vidalia onion for this but honestly I
13:09
was like kind of out so I just did a rad.
13:12
It's not a big deal. I do prefer using red onions raw
13:18
and Vidalia for cooking. Really not a big deal.
13:24
I also added a second big container of baby spinach to
13:28
that guy. That's the ovens at 3:50.
13:32
I'm actually going to add some of the cheese sauce to that
13:35
spinach situation just to get it to like melt a little.
13:38
And then we're going to do our sweet component and then we'll
13:42
come back and revisit all of this stuff.
13:45
OK, I actually called an audible who who look at me using sports
13:48
terms. And we're going to finish the
13:51
spinach situation first 'cause I just turned the stove off.
13:54
So I added a bit of the cheese sauce.
13:56
It's two big containers of baby spinach and one onion that was
14:00
all sauteed together. I have these artichoke bottoms.
14:05
I ordered them on Amazon. And quite frankly, I just can't
14:11
get the sexual part of it out of my head.
14:13
Like every time I say artichoke. Poke bottoms.
14:16
I'm like. OK, anyway, we'll just move
14:19
right along. Like I wonder what kind of Lube
14:21
they use, but that's neither here nor there.
14:24
I'm going to drain these and then we're going to assemble the
14:29
thing. I don't know if it's going to
14:30
work, but it's this vision that I had.
14:32
They have artichoke bottoms. They kind of look like
14:37
pineapple. Like, do you see that?
14:39
Am I going crazy? I love this part of the
14:43
artichoke. Like the leafy bits of the
14:45
artichoke can respectfully, respectfully, go fuck
14:49
themselves. I want the bottom.
14:52
I want a power bottom. I want a power bottom.
14:57
And I want the stems. The leaves get out of here, by
15:03
the way. Look how pretty.
15:05
Look how pretty. Ow that's hot as fuck.
15:09
It's almost as over, just on the stove for 30 minutes.
15:13
All right, so I'm just going to spoon this in.
15:15
Oh, did I ever say what? I was doing here.
15:18
Or you're just finding out for the first time.
15:20
So my idea was instead of doing a spinach or an artichoke dip,
15:25
we do these spinach artichoke bites.
15:29
So it's like spinach artichoke dip in like an hors d'oeuvre
15:34
form and we. All know how I feel about hors
15:37
d'oeuvres so. Yeah, apparently I did like some
15:41
crack. While we were on commercial
15:44
break, not sure what happened there.
15:47
Also I keep saying. Commercial.
15:48
Break like I don't. Know that there are commercials
15:51
during these breaks, especially if you're watching on YouTube
15:54
there. Or not.
15:55
Is my understanding. While the camera was off because
15:59
I was doing something that wasn't worth filming.
16:03
Arguably nothing I do is worth filming, but.
16:06
You know, well, I think this is going to be adorable.
16:10
Also, we're having people over for the Knicks game in a few
16:14
nights, and this is kind of a test run for me to see if I'm
16:18
going to make this whole menu again for our guests.
16:21
But I think so, 'cause look at this shit.
16:23
It's fucking beautiful. I saw this really cute video on
16:30
TikTok the other day. It was a high school graduation
16:35
and there was a kid in the graduating class who is on the
16:41
spectrum and he has like he's, he has sensory issues with loud
16:46
sounds. And so before he walked, they
16:49
asked the audience to not clap and cheer for him 'cause you
16:53
know, it triggers him. And he was even like plugging
16:56
his ears, which was so cute. And the entire class stood up
16:59
for him and. I'm just thinking about it.
17:05
Oh, you don't mind me? I'm going to go cry.
17:08
No, I'm literally crying. Oh my God.
17:10
This looks so good. OK, I'm taking it out for a
17:14
second. I'm going to put the baking tray
17:16
in and then I will put it back on the baking tray.
17:19
But I just want you to take it. Doesn't that look shit?
17:22
I like it like that. Not copyrighted music only.
17:28
I act like they would even know what I'm thinking.
17:33
Like it's actually concerning how bad I am at singing.
17:37
It's to the point where I wonder if it's a medical issue.
17:41
Like I don't think I should beat this.
17:42
It's not just that I Can't Sing, it's that when I sing, you don't
17:47
even know what song I'm singing. Like it's not just that I don't
17:50
have a good voice, it's like I also have no melody.
17:53
Like it's really, it's like. What kind of doctor just want
17:57
to? Go to for this OK I'm going to
17:59
move some of this shit and then we're actually going to do the
18:01
dessert stuff and then I don't know we'll find out wait when I
18:06
was in Australia one of our friends kids she's like 4 maybe
18:11
the mom was saying that she's so filled with love that sometimes
18:15
she'll. Just like punch someone.
18:18
But it's 'cause. She's so like she's.
18:20
Just like obsessed. So she just doesn't.
18:23
Know what to do with all her feelings and gets violent and
18:26
it's hands. Down one of the funniest things
18:28
I've. Ever heard?
18:29
In my entire life. Like I can't wait to see what
18:33
kind of BDSM she gets. Into when she's older.
18:37
Wow, let's pretend I. Didn't say that.
18:38
OK, so we're going to make these kind of like cookies.
18:43
I don't know why I said kind of like they're cookies.
18:45
Like why? Why do we qualify things instead
18:49
of saying them directly? You know, people always talk
18:51
about filler words. Filler words, sure.
18:53
But I actually think the reason a lot of us say like is to
18:57
qualify what we're saying or to almost lessen the impact rather
19:02
than just, you know, saying it with our chest.
19:04
Whatever. Anyway, so I'm using these sugar
19:07
free shortbread cookies, which is not the type of thing I would
19:10
usually buy, but when I was at my parents house last they had
19:15
them because my sister-in-law really likes them and they're
19:17
kind of quite good and they're really good in this context in
19:20
my opinion. So I'm using this these
19:24
chocolate chips and they're sweetened with coconut sugar,
19:27
which honestly isn't my favorite, but I I like the just
19:32
dates ones a lot. But my brother is allergic to
19:35
dates and I want him to have some.
19:37
So I'm just using this instead. It's fine.
19:39
So I'm just going to throw this in the microwave to melt it and
19:42
then I kind of want to do another version of these that's
19:45
going to be a bit more experimental.
19:46
Also, this feels like too much, but whatever.
19:51
So I already have an open sleeve of this, so I just brought the
19:55
box. Like just for showing you
19:57
purposes. That's it.
19:59
Now we just wait for that shit to melt.
20:02
Yeah, we might do a white chocolate version of it too.
20:04
I don't know. We'll see it.
20:05
And in fact, I'm just going to open this box.
20:08
I got to remember that episode. It was the afternoon tea episode
20:14
with the food processor and how it was like fucking impossible
20:18
to take the lid off. That was really traumatizing.
20:21
For the record, I do think it's really important that I make
20:24
note of this. I had every intention of getting
20:27
blue flowers for the Nyx and I. Wearing blue for the next, but
20:32
they didn't have any, so that's where we're doing it.
20:35
But I mean, orange is next and I'm wearing blue, so there you
20:38
go. Nick's coated.
20:39
Yay. Also, you can add a bit of
20:44
coconut oil to this and it just makes it glossier and a bit
20:48
better, but I'm not doing that today.
20:53
Not today, Satan. Sometimes the inside of my
20:58
microwave catches on fire. Kind of a problem and.
21:02
This should tell you a. Lot about how little my landlord
21:05
is willing to. Fix that.
21:07
That's not even a. Priority for me like the
21:09
microwave catches on fire and I'm like whatever let's just let
21:13
it catch on fire we have bigger fridge to fry like I literally.
21:17
Can't access my. Fire escape, Like if there's a
21:19
fire, I will die, OK? That's my priority over the end.
21:24
Like quite frankly, it's very likely that we will have a fire
21:27
given the fucking microwave catches on.
21:29
Fire when it's in use. Aw, that's beautifully melted.
21:36
OK, now I have done these a zillion different ways, but I
21:40
think the way that I'm about to do it is one of the more
21:43
aesthetically pleasing ways that I've done it.
21:46
So I just take these cookies. I just dip them in, not the
21:50
whole thing. So they kind of have edges well.
21:56
Right after I sat that I just tipped that whole one in.
21:58
Basically, you know what, I kind of made a huge mistake, but I
22:03
don't want to get into it right this second.
22:05
I'd really. Appreciate it if you could
22:07
respect my privacy. In this moment also literally I
22:11
said not the whole thing and I've.
22:12
Just proceeded to tip. The whole thing of all of these
22:16
in we're going to add coconut flakes to these.
22:19
Spoiler alert, this also works really well with WASA crackers.
22:25
It's actually like one of my favorite things in the world.
22:28
But pretend you didn't hear that, because we'll probably do
22:32
that in a. Future episode.
22:34
I don't know which one yet, but it's probably going to happen,
22:37
so oops. You know what's crazy?
22:42
People who don't like chocolate. I just can't relate to that.
22:48
Like that just sounds so odd to me.
22:51
Like. What a.
22:53
Weird way to behave. I just don't like chocolate.
22:56
The fuck? Why?
23:00
OK, this actually worked out quite nicely.
23:03
Odd Coconut. Maybe I won't do all of them.
23:07
Maybe I'll do half coconut and half not with coconut.
23:10
I've also done it with crushed nuts.
23:13
Sea salt. I mean, there's a lot of ways to
23:15
play this, but edible flowers, obviously.
23:21
And then, yeah, if you're having guests and want to impress them,
23:24
I do recommend adding a bit of that coconut oil.
23:26
It just, it just makes it a bit nicer and you don't have to do
23:32
much, like a tiny teaspoon and all of that is plenty.
23:37
So does this not look beautiful? OK, that seems good.
23:44
Now I want to try the other thing.
23:47
I don't know, like look at my nail.
23:51
I don't know if it's going to work the way I'm hoping, but
23:55
we're just going to try. This is vegan white chocolate,
23:57
by the way. This is what I fucked up, by the
24:00
way. I wish I'd put something under
24:02
it. OK, this is what I'm really
24:13
uncertain about. So I want to add a plant based
24:17
food coloring. I have this like orange powder
24:20
stuff, but I don't know if it's going to work in this 'cause I
24:27
think the powders are water based.
24:29
I just don't know if it'll actually color this or not.
24:34
Yeah, I don't think it like properly blends in.
24:39
I mean, we already have it, so I'm just going to dip some of
24:45
these guys in and then I think I can just sprinkle them with the
24:51
orange stuff after. Maybe that'll look OK.
24:54
I mean, it kind of has a confetti like look to it right
24:57
this second, which I don't hate, but I was going to make little
25:02
basketballs, like draw the lines of a basketball, but thought I'm
25:06
not going to do because it's not orange.
25:10
So that would be weird. By the way, I just started
25:14
watching the new season of Bridgerton.
25:18
I know I'm quite late. It is so good.
25:21
If you haven't watched it yet, it's like very Cinderella coated
25:25
stunning. OK, I'm just going to try to
25:30
sprinkle some of this orange powder on again.
25:34
It's not going to look like basketballs, which is what I was
25:38
hoping for, but that'll be kind of Nix coded and then we can
25:43
just pretend this whole part of the episode didn't even happen.
25:47
You know what? So far, I don't hate how this
25:48
looks. I just don't know how it's going
25:50
to dry. I'm going to clean some of this
25:53
stuff up. We're going to come back, We're
25:55
going to do the last portion of this, get everything together,
25:58
style it, yadda, yadda, yadda. Now we're going to assemble a
26:04
little platter. We're going to put our dip on
26:06
it. I was thinking we could.
26:10
I was thinking we could pass the plague on to our.
26:12
Guest I was thinking we could put the artichoke things in
26:15
here, but we need some stuff on our platter, so #1 we're going
26:20
to put some baguette because it is a.
26:24
Garlic red chip. So I feel like there should be
26:27
bread, you know, let them eat bread.
26:31
Actually, fun fact, did you know that Mary Antoinette actually
26:36
said let them eat brioche, which is a type of bread and it's just
26:41
been translated as cake? At least I read that somewhere
26:45
and God knows where. So definitely Fact Check it
26:47
because the thing about me that I don't like to admit is I know
26:52
exceptionally little about world history.
26:56
It just was not my jam in school.
26:58
And this is what I mean by school is wasted on the youth.
27:02
I would love to take a world history class now because now as
27:06
an adult, I know how embarrassing.
27:08
It is to know nothing about world history.
27:11
Whereas as a child I didn't give a fuck.
27:13
Like I was like. No one's.
27:15
Going to care if I know anything about these stupid uninteresting
27:18
things, but now as an adult I do know people do care and they do
27:22
judge you when you don't know these things.
27:24
So feel free to show this to your high school and middle
27:28
school age children. And that is the.
27:31
Only part of this show that they should watch ever.
27:34
Please. All right, so I'm just doing
27:36
like a tiny bit of crudite just to introduce some color and
27:41
texture and stuff. But like garlic red dip isn't
27:44
something you're going to dip cucumbers into.
27:46
You know what I mean? It's not like a hummus platter.
27:48
So we don't need to go crazy here.
27:50
But I just thought I started cutting this in the most fucked
27:54
up way. But I just thought if there's no
27:58
veggies, that's going to, it's just too beige.
28:01
And as much as I like that for my outfits and my home, I don't
28:05
like that for my food. I heard that.
28:10
Ozzy just started playing a podcast as though we're not in
28:13
the middle of. Something aw, he wants everyone
28:21
to know he sneezed. It wasn't a podcast and I'm just
28:24
going to do a watermelon radish. I can.
28:26
It doesn't really matter because this is, well, the shittiest
28:31
fucking watermelon radish. Like I hate when that happens.
28:35
But yeah, like I said, this isn't really.
28:36
I mean, I'll eat it, but normal people won't.
28:40
So this is the worst watermelon radish I've ever seen.
28:44
I'm so pissed. It's like barely watermelon.
28:48
It's mostly rind. Whatever, I'm not even going to
28:51
slice. The rest of this is stupid
28:52
fuckery. Oh, and then I brought just some
28:56
whole cloves to add for like decor and styling.
29:01
Oh, also, we're going to add fresh parsley to the top of the
29:04
garlic bread dip because as aforementioned, parsley tends to
29:07
be on garlic bread, right? Am I right about that or am I
29:10
go? I'll say, am I right?
29:12
Anyway, I thought it would be cool to drizzle this roasted
29:14
garlic oil on top also, which I haven't used, but it looks quite
29:19
good. And then the other thing I
29:21
wanted to do is take some wasa cracker, brush it up and add the
29:28
crumbs on top so there's like a little crunchy element.
29:32
Wassup. Crackers just have so much
29:33
fucking fiber, you know? OK Oh, this was time to turn it
29:38
off for sure. So we'll bring this guy over
29:42
here. And then these are adorable.
29:48
Perfection. Exactly how I envisioned it.
29:53
That bubbling sound. Fuck me.
29:56
Do you see the way that cheese just bubble?
30:00
OK, let's assemble all this and style it.
30:03
Yeah. OK, let's see how to arrange
30:06
this. And depending on how fresh your
30:09
baguette is, I would consider toasting the bread, but doesn't
30:15
really matter. OK, so little drizzle of this
30:21
oil smells so good. I'll do some parsley on here.
30:28
Got some of these to here too. OK, I feel like I have to change
30:34
out the plate that these artichoke hearts are on.
30:37
It's just too dark. Yeah, that looks infinitely
30:42
better already. And then maybe some edible
30:46
flowers in the mix. I'm honestly covering this
30:51
watermelon radish because it can respectfully go fuck itself.
30:55
It's so ugly. Respectfully.
31:06
OK, I don't hate that. OK.
31:11
I feel like it's time to taste this.
31:14
Oh, fuck yeah. It's kind of exactly what I was
31:18
hoping for, Hot and hot. It's way too hot.
31:25
It's way. Too hot.
31:26
Way too hot. Yeah, that's really good.
31:39
Very good. It's kind of perfect.
31:43
I'm obsessed with that. I want to try one of these two
31:48
and honestly it's reminding me of being young, going on dates
31:51
and avoiding ordering things with spinach in it because I was
31:54
scared I was going to get shit on my teeth.
31:57
That's honestly exactly how I envisioned it.
32:01
It's a little bit more artichoke heavy or artichoke.
32:05
Forward, I should say. Than your traditional spinach
32:09
artichoke dip just because you're really like putting your
32:11
tongue on artichoke if that makes sense Delicious perfection
32:16
wouldn't change it for the world.
32:18
OK I think it's time to check on our cookies.
32:21
Although I'm just going to eat a bit more of this because wow I'm
32:27
glad cookie time. OK, these cookies seem to upset
32:30
quite nicely, so I'm going to transfer them onto a plate.
32:38
And you know what? These ones don't even look half
32:41
bad I feel like. There we go.
32:45
Look at these cutie patootie. Love it.
32:51
OK, I'm going to eat a quick cookie and then I guess I'll go
32:55
clean off. Gross.
33:02
It's literally perfection. Oh, I wish I'd done a drink.
33:07
My mouth is dry. OK, there it is.
33:09
There you have it. Our game day snacks.
33:11
The key really is make the cheese sauce the day before.
33:14
You could even roast the garlic and the onion the day before.
33:17
And then it really isn't that heavy of a lift the day of.
33:21
And because everything is so high in protein and fiber, it's
33:25
actually so much more filling than like a dip and something
33:30
else would be in under any other circumstances.
33:33
If you enjoyed this episode, rate, review, subscribe.
33:37
Do all the things. Seriously, please subscribe on
33:39
YouTube. Like, we need it.
33:40
Please. Let's do it.
33:42
Yeah, that's it. Love you.
33:44
Thanks for being here. Bye. want to get it at your the
33:56
pleb seasons don't really. OK.
34:03
Yeah, I'm sure my audience is going to be all over that.