Latest / JOY LOVING HOME - SAHM, Productivity, Home Organization, Declutter, ADHD Mom, ADHD SAHM, ADHD Brain / 257: 3 ADHD Tips to Get Back on Track When You Can't Stick to Your Plans
Transcript
- 0:00Oh, the irony of the fact that the majority of content that you have probably consumed in 2026,
- 0:07and frankly, every new year, has been about systems or routines or planning
- 0:13or habits or how to change and how to stick to your changes.
- 0:17But all of your best laid plans have already been busted. Can you relate?
- 0:25Let's talk about what now. A wise person once said, Everybody is a genius,
- 0:31but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole
- 0:36life believing that it's stupid.
- 0:38Well, Fish, quit trying to climb trees while getting advice from well-intentioned monkeys.
- 0:43It's time to jump in the water and learn how to swim with the current of your life.
- 0:48I'm Joy, a professional organizer, mom of four, and fellow Fishbrain.
- 0:53If you're looking for a place to get understanding, encouragement,
- 0:57and ideas for your home that actually fit how your brain thinks,
- 1:01then I'm glad you're here.
- 1:03Let's ditch the type A advice and embrace what makes our brains and our homes unique.
- 1:09Together, we could have a joy-loving home.
- 1:14If you are any of my listeners from anywhere in America, you have likely been
- 1:20hit by the recent winter storm event that just seemed to have covered all of America recently.
- 1:27And your whole existence may have gotten thrown off kilter from power outages
- 1:34or canceled trips or just being stuck in your home with kids at home that were
- 1:41supposed to be back at school or maybe if you weren't affected by it,
- 1:46you've been hit by the flu outbreak that seems to be very rampant here right now,
- 1:51or any number of just life happenings,
- 1:54which we don't seem to account for in our shiny new planners or the how to stick
- 2:02to your goals by being consistent preaching that we have heard since the beginning
- 2:07of this year and every year.
- 2:09And when life happens, we have to be able to cope.
- 2:16And this coping that we need to do has to take place in a way that will not
- 2:23derail our whole mindset about what we're trying to achieve.
- 2:31And I think particularly those of us with fish brains, this whole ADHD difficulty
- 2:38of this all or nothing thinking causes us to literally give up.
- 2:45Just, okay, well, that didn't work. It's over now. I tried.
- 2:49It's January 30th and it's over.
- 2:53I'm done. I'll start again next year And I don't want us to get stuck in that.
- 2:58I want us to have some different perspectives. And I want to chat about three
- 3:04different ways to think about what's happening if you're in the midst of a derail. That,
- 3:12can maybe help us refocus. So the first one, and it's probably very obvious,
- 3:17but it's worth saying, and that is, step one, I want you to get into your big
- 3:22picture thinking, okay?
- 3:24Right now, you've been living in the, I want to focus on what's happening today.
- 3:28I want to stick to this new plan I had.
- 3:30I got to get through today with these goals. It's the 10,000 steps.
- 3:33It's the go do the exercise. It's to keep the sink clear.
- 3:38It's to vacuum every other day.
- 3:43It's whatever it was that you had set about doing. You were in that day,
- 3:48every day, trying to see if you can make sure that you're doing what you said
- 3:52you were going to do every single day.
- 3:55And when we're zoomed in that closely and things start to come off the rails,
- 3:59we can get incredibly frustrated at ourselves, at our families,
- 4:06at our circumstances that we're in,
- 4:08and we've lost the big picture.
- 4:12And so I want us to zoom back out. There's a reason I called this the Joy Living Home Podcast.
- 4:18Aside from the fact that that's my name, but the
- 4:22joy-loving home is
- 4:26not called the Clutter Clearing Podcast or
- 4:29the Tidy Living Podcast or the Minimalist Mamas Podcast because I wanted us
- 4:36to focus on the whole point of having our homes be this place that we're happy
- 4:43in and excited about and that doesn't have to do with any particular kind of aesthetic.
- 4:49It has to do with what we're prioritizing. So if you need to zoom out and remind
- 4:54yourself that the most important thing that your goal that you're setting about
- 4:58for your home is happiness and love and health of everybody in it,
- 5:03if that's your bigger picture,
- 5:05then ask yourself, what is the most important part to keep my overall goal for my home intact?
- 5:12And if that is all that needs to happen right now is that my family knows they're
- 5:18being taken care of, that I know I'm taken care of,
- 5:22that I am not worried about things falling apart around us because all that
- 5:29has to happen in this next hour is hydration and sleep and, you know.
- 5:35Loved on because we just feel lousy and we just want somebody to sit with us.
- 5:40Whatever it is that will make the people in your home feel loved and cared for
- 5:46and nursed towards health, if that's a season you're in right now,
- 5:50then lean into that season and quit beating yourself up about the fact that
- 5:55the January New Year goal was falling apart.
- 6:00So I just want us to shift into that,
- 6:05okay, okay, let me get out of my grumpiness that I didn't get the 10,000 steps
- 6:09yesterday, and let me ask myself, what am I prioritizing in this little blip, in this radar?
- 6:17It is a big, long year, and this is a blip that we are in the midst of that has a finite end.
- 6:23We are going to get through this and zoom out to that big picture.
- 6:28Second idea, I'm calling the ad break.
- 6:33Back in the day, every show came on with commercials.
- 6:38And the commercial breaks were actually a wonderful chance to shift our focus for half a second.
- 6:45We would jump up and go to the bathroom. We would go refill the water.
- 6:49We would try and hurry up and load the dishwasher. We would do whatever needed
- 6:54to be done and rush ourselves back to sit back and focus again on the show when the show came back on.
- 7:02I actually miss it. The best we've got now are these ad breaks and these videos
- 7:06we're watching if they even have been to be forced upon us.
- 7:10And we're just sitting still and watching for the skip button to come on.
- 7:14And we've lost any amount of sort of this intentional focus break that actually
- 7:20sometimes can help us get other things done.
- 7:22So I want you to zoom out and go, okay, let me look at this as the ad break to my plans.
- 7:29My plans were to do X, Y, or Z for as long as I could all year long, but I am in an ad break.
- 7:37I am in a disruption. I am in a lose focus on what you are focused on,
- 7:42but what can I use this time for instead?
- 7:46And if that helps you reset what your big picture was. If that helps you to
- 7:50say, okay, you know what?
- 7:52I might not be able to do the exact plan that I had, but what can I do right
- 7:59now in this crappy time that we're stuck in right now?
- 8:03So if it's, well, all the kids are stuck at home and I hadn't planned on figuring out.
- 8:09Spring clothes because that seems really far away, but they're all going to
- 8:13be shot up another three inches.
- 8:15And maybe while I've got them all here, we're going to have summer party day
- 8:19inside so I can make them try on all their summer clothes.
- 8:22And they don't even know we're making them try on their summer clothes.
- 8:24And it's a fun way for me to see what needs to go.
- 8:29If they start trying things on and I need to hand them down to the next kid
- 8:33and pack some others up to go.
- 8:35And this was completely out of the cycle that I thought I would do this in,
- 8:39this is what an ad break is for.
- 8:42Like just if you're stuck with a kid who's not feeling well in their bed and
- 8:47you can't go that far or they're on the couch sleeping and you are trying to stay still,
- 8:53maybe it's the time to go through all the excess emails and work your way through those.
- 8:59Something that you're like, I wasn't planning on doing this.
- 9:02This wasn't any part of my plans.
- 9:04But all of a sudden, here I am stuck in this ad break, and I'm going to shift
- 9:10my focus for a little bit.
- 9:12And when this season passes, this moment passes, this ad is over,
- 9:16I can see if I want to refocus back on what the initial January plan was.
- 9:22The next one I'm calling time to swipe. And I hesitated what I wanted to call
- 9:27this because when I hear the word swipe, I think it's something we do every three seconds.
- 9:31And I don't want this to feel that quick. I'm going to actually call it,
- 9:36maybe it's time to find a new show.
- 9:37Forgive the dogs barking in the background if you're hearing that somebody's
- 9:41using a blower outside and they're.
- 9:47When you might be watching a show and maybe you loved it the first season and
- 9:55you're tuned into the second season and you're like, I don't know what they're
- 9:59doing here. Like this completely fell off.
- 10:02Oh, but we've done this far. Let's stick to it. Okay. I'm like forcing myself
- 10:07to sit down and watch this.
- 10:09Or you're partway through a movie and it's aggravating and you're like,
- 10:12why are we wasting our time with this?
- 10:14But you feel like you're supposed to see it through to the end. maybe not.
- 10:18Maybe you're okay to cut your losses and say, why do I want to waste another
- 10:24minute doing something that isn't enjoyable, that isn't working for me,
- 10:30that isn't doing what I wanted it to do,
- 10:32which was maybe I needed something light and easy and I'm watching this scary,
- 10:37down, depressing movie right now. Maybe there's another time for that.
- 10:40Whatever the case may be, If you are getting through this tough moment and you're
- 10:47already dreading trying to get yourself the energy to go back to what you were doing,
- 10:52maybe this is the time to say, okay, the pause was because I needed to change.
- 10:59There is a lot of energy that goes into starting something new.
- 11:05That is this excitement and momentum for our very novel-seeking brains that
- 11:10gets us rolling. It gets the ball going.
- 11:12But when a routine or a new way to try something has been interrupted,
- 11:19the energy it takes to restart something that your brain already understands
- 11:25and already knew and there's no novelty to it anymore is horribly,
- 11:31I mean, it's drudgery.
- 11:34And so instead of beating yourself up and going, but it was working, but it was great.
- 11:39Why can't I ever, I'm such a failure to not be able to pick back up.
- 11:43Why can't I pick back up where I left off?
- 11:46The spark of the newness has run its course.
- 11:50And now maybe it's time to go, okay, let me in the ad break,
- 11:55in this season of things not going right, maybe I search out the next thing that excites my brain.
- 12:02And look forward to starting that when this little season of a blip is over.
- 12:08This is one of the biggest aha revelations when I started the membership group
- 12:14and we would change topics every month.
- 12:16And some people were like, oh, but I love that month and that month was great.
- 12:20And it doesn't mean it wasn't great. It doesn't mean what we did that month was worthless.
- 12:25But the longer we do the same thing, the more our brain starts losing the dopamine
- 12:32for it and needing something new and different in a shift.
- 12:35So maybe it's time to swipe.
- 12:38Maybe it's time to abandon what was good about that first thing.
- 12:43Be happy you did it. It's almost the end of January anyway.
- 12:48Maybe you get excited to spark something new for February.
- 12:52And instead of feeling bad about that, lean into it.
- 12:57Think the spark we need to get going sometimes is worth more than the beating
- 13:04ourselves up energy of trying to go back to what we had started with.
- 13:09So think about three ideas. Make sure you're zooming out on the big picture.
- 13:14Take advantage of this ad break that you're in.
- 13:17And maybe it's time to swipe and start something new once everybody's healthy
- 13:21again, or they're all back in school after the snow or whatever it is that you're
- 13:26facing that took you off the rails.
- 13:30And if I can add one little piece of bonus commentary, if you are sleep deprived
- 13:36because of whatever season you're in, if that's little babies,
- 13:40if that's kids that are teething, if that's kids that got sick and are up all
- 13:45night, if you're in my case and you've got two dogs that are going through some
- 13:49physical ailments that are causing them not to sleep, so therefore you're not sleeping.
- 13:55Give yourself some grace. When we are sleep deprived, everything is harder.
- 14:02Everything seems gloomier. We lose all perspective.
- 14:06So start with the get your sleep, hydrate well, take care of you,
- 14:13move around so your brain can clear, and then look at one of these three approaches.
- 14:20Because let me tell you, sleep is a gift.
- 14:23And I don't think we appreciate how much it affects us when we're in it,
- 14:31and really going through it.
- 14:32So anyway, I will leave you guys there.
- 14:35I hope that sort of shift in perspective might be helpful to really rethink
- 14:40and quit beating ourselves up on what's currently a rough blip in our radar.
- 14:47All right. Until next time, guys, continue to choose joy.