Latest / The Daily Sarcast / March 11th, 2026: NASA's Thing, New Clothes And What Goes On At The Spa

Transcript

March 11th, 2026: NASA's Thing, New Clothes And What Goes On At The Spa · The Daily Sarcast

• 0:00
  Today's episode is sponsored by the sneak peek of spring.
• 0:03
  I can't see any of you because these spotlights are glaring bright.
• 0:07
  The person who runs these spotlights must be a Democrat because I cannot see
• 0:11
  a single person in that crowd.
• 0:13
  J.D. Vance's attempt at a joke.
• 0:16
  Insert theme song here. This is the Daily Starcast. I give you the news and
• 0:20
  maybe a laugh. I'm Lindsay Vernick and it's March 11th, 2026.
• 0:24
  Apparently, it's supposed to snow next week, which is so crazy, right?
• 0:30
  I think we always seem to forget about this like little window after winter
• 0:33
  where it all of a sudden gets suddenly gorgeous outside and so great and then
• 0:39
  it's like freezing again.
• 0:40
  So hopefully this is the very last of it and we can finally put our winter jackets away for the year.
• 0:46
  In real news, a 1,323 pound NASA satellite
• 0:51
  called the Van Allen Probe A is currently on its way back to Earth.
• 0:55
  It's been up there since 2012, studying the Van Allen radiation belts,
• 1:00
  which is like Earth's invisible force field against space junk like solar storms.
• 1:05
  So when it's coming down to hit the atmosphere, it'll be flying in at negative 17,000 miles per hour.
• 1:11
  Most of it's going to burn up like a marshmallow in a fire. However,
• 1:15
  a few pieces might survive the jet.
• 1:18
  I mean, should you panic while walking down Lexington Avenue? No.
• 1:22
  NASA says the odds of someone getting hit are 1 in 4,200, which sounds very
• 1:28
  scary until you remember.
• 1:29
  Your odds of getting struck by lightning in your lifetime are about 1 in 15,000.
• 1:33
  Your odds of getting hit by a falling satellite are basically larger than getting
• 1:37
  a match on Hinge these days.
• 1:39
  Also, they can't predict where it lands because it's tumbling around Earth in the orbit.
• 1:44
  The official words from NASA are don't worry about it. So the realistic outcomes
• 1:49
  here are nothing happens, which is 99.99999% likely.
• 1:55
  Someone, or maybe a few people, get to see a cool fireball streak across the sky.
• 2:01
  Maybe a small piece lands in the ocean or desert and scares maybe an animal or two, or a lot.
• 2:08
  Even an astrophysicist said, relax, bigger junk falls all the time.
• 2:13
  Which is comforting and also very concerning at the same time.
• 2:17
  The actual interesting part is this. We're launching so many satellites now
• 2:22
  that scientists are quietly realizing, Like, maybe we shouldn't treat that atmosphere
• 2:25
  as a giant space trash incinerator. Is that crazy?
• 2:30
  Anyway, if something does fall in Manhattan, it will absolutely land in a $4,200
• 2:36
  a month studio apartment and immediately be listed on Street Easy as loft with giant skylight.
• 2:43
  Here's something crazy I learned today.
• 2:45
  Apparently, you're supposed to wash your new clothes before wearing them,
• 2:49
  which is annoying because the entire thrill of buying something new is immediately wearing it.
• 2:55
  Dermatologists say new clothes can actually cause skin reactions.
• 2:58
  People have reported getting hives or itchy rashes shortly after wearing brand new outfits.
• 3:03
  And before you assume that it's just like dramatic TikTok behavior,
• 3:07
  doctors say that it's actually pretty common.
• 3:10
  The reason is that clothing goes through a lot before it gets to you.
• 3:13
  During manufacturing, fabrics are treated with a variety of chemicals,
• 3:17
  things like dyes, fungicides, fragrances, and finishing agents that help keep
• 3:21
  clothes wrinkle-fruity and mildew-resistant while they sit in warehouses and stores.
• 3:27
  Some fabrics even contain this thing called formaldehyde, which is used to prevent wrinkles.
• 3:32
  And if that word sounds familiar, it's because it's also used in embalming.
• 3:36
  So technically, your new shirt is stylish and lightly preserved at the same time.
• 3:41
  There can also be pesticide residue on cotton and certain dyes that irritate
• 3:45
  skin, especially in areas where clothes rub against you, like the waist, neck, or underarms.
• 3:49
  The good news is that washing your clothes once removes a lot of these chemicals.
• 3:54
  The bad news is that some treatments are designed to survive multiple washes,
• 3:59
  which is exactly what you want in a rain jacket, but slightly less comforting in your new Lulus.
• 4:04
  Doctors say the safest move is to wash your clothes before wearing them,
• 4:08
  especially if you have sensitive skin, which means the next time you buy something
• 4:12
  new, you should probably throw it in the wash first.
• 4:14
  Or you can do what most of us do, wear it immediately and just hope for the best.
• 4:19
  Parents across the country are trying to cut down their kids' screen time at
• 4:23
  home, only to discover their children are basically a part of a small tech startup at school.
• 4:28
  A new report says that 81% of elementary teachers say students now get devices
• 4:33
  in class by kindergarten.
• 4:35
  And in some classrooms, that means iPads, YouTube videos, and educational apps
• 4:40
  are becoming part of the daily routine.
• 4:42
  Which has surprised some parents who assume kindergarten would involve things
• 4:46
  like finger painting, nap time, and learning how to share. not like pre-roll
• 4:50
  ads and algorithm recommendations and,
• 4:53
  One mom in New York realized how much screen time her daughter was getting when
• 4:57
  her kindergartner started recognizing advertising jingles from YouTube videos
• 5:01
  she had watched in class that day.
• 5:03
  And honestly, that's a really tough moment as a parent when your 5-year-old
• 5:07
  suddenly knows more about targeted marketing than you do.
• 5:10
  Experts say excessive screen time can contribute to things like anxiety,
• 5:14
  attention issues, and delayed social development.
• 5:17
  Which makes sense because school's supposed to be where kids learn how to interact
• 5:20
  with other humans, not just swipe past them.
• 5:24
  Some parents have also discovered their kids watching music videos or movies
• 5:27
  during breaks, indoor recess, or lunch.
• 5:30
  In one case, a mom recorded her daughter dancing, and when the song ended,
• 5:34
  the kid looked at the camera and said, If you like what you saw,
• 5:37
  click below to subscribe.
• 5:39
  Which means the influencer pipeline now officially starts in kindergarten.
• 5:43
  Because of concerns from parents and teachers, some school districts are starting
• 5:47
  to scale back devices for younger students and return to more traditional classroom
• 5:51
  activities like writing, reading, and actual human interaction,
• 5:56
  which apparently is now considered a bold new educational strategy.
• 6:00
  So if you're wondering how much screen time kids are getting these days, the answer is simple.
• 6:04
  Apparently enough that some teachers say they're literally watching some students
• 6:08
  detox when the iPads get taken away.
• 6:11
  And if the kindergartners are already detoxing from screens,
• 6:15
  I think that means the rest of us might have a problem too.
• 6:18
  In Lindsay life I was working at the spa the other day
• 6:21
  it was like 11 a.m I'm at
• 6:24
  the front desk I'm bored and I look over at the cafe and there's
• 6:27
  this like really cute guy sitting there by himself and
• 6:30
  I was like oh my god I have to go
• 6:33
  shoot my shot like literally what else am I doing like this New
• 6:36
  York Times crossword puzzle is so boring and I can't solve
• 6:39
  it like so I turn to my co-workers who are like standing on the other side and
• 6:44
  I was like hey like please watch the front desk I'm gonna go hit on this guy
• 6:47
  over there so they were like lindsey what it's like literally 11 a.m on a monday
• 6:52
  morning and i'm like yeah but like that guy's cute and like when else like who cares whatever.
• 6:58
  So my coworker like comes up to the front, covers the desk for me.
• 7:01
  I walk over to the cafe and I'm like prepping in my mind, like what I'm about
• 7:05
  to say to him and I get close to him.
• 7:09
  I walk past him. I turn and I kid you not, as I am about to open my mouth and
• 7:14
  ask him what he is eating,
• 7:17
  this girl walks in and
• 7:20
  like kisses him on the cheek and I spin
• 7:24
  and I turn and I turn right back and
• 7:26
  I walk back to the spa and I cover my face like oh
• 7:29
  my god and all my co-workers watching
• 7:32
  really holy shit this girl how did
• 7:35
  that just happen so I guess that's what
• 7:38
  I get for trying to hit on a guy 11 a.m on a Monday things I'm thinking about
• 7:42
  how when people check out products at the spa I'll be like do you actually like
• 7:46
  this and they'll sell me on the product as I literally check them out cooking
• 7:50
  tip of the day butter is so much better to cook with an olive oil unless you're
• 7:55
  at risk for heart disease or habit, of course.
• 7:57
  Feedback, comments, questions, and I show you by looking for a date,
• 8:00
  email me at lindsay at thedailystarcast.com. Thanks so much for listening,
• 8:04
  and I'll talk to you guys tomorrow.