Latest / The Hotmomz Lifestyle Podcast / Friendship and Success #11

Transcript

Friendship and Success #11 · The Hotmomz Lifestyle Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This is the hat moms lifestyle podcast.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Beverages on ain't no or go no, no mediocre.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: I won't get no mediocre.
• 0:09
  Speaker 2: You bet.
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: The hot moms lifestyle podcast.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: Yep.
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: I'm on a bed.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: I got.
• 0:14
  Speaker 2: If I don't bet all I gotta do.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: You ain't go,
• 0:18
  Speaker 3: you're listening to the hot moms lifestyle podcast.
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: If you're looking for easy listening, you're in the wrong place.
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: But if you want to put in the work to change your life for the better, laugh a little bit and learn a lot about yourself.
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: Get ready.
• 0:33
  Speaker 3: This ain't your basic podcast.
• 0:35
  Speaker 3: Here she is to give you all the tools you need to fill.
• 0:38
  Speaker 3: Empower, healthy, sexy, and inform.
• 0:41
  Speaker 3: This is Casey ship
• 0:44
  Speaker 4: wanting to, good morning.
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: It is Monday 11:00 AM in the car.
• 0:49
  Speaker 4: I'm headed back.
• 0:50
  Speaker 4: Where did I go on to chiropractor?
• 0:52
  Speaker 4: Cause I was supposed to go twice last week and I did not and it fell lower on priority lists than my other stuff.
• 0:58
  Speaker 4: Cause if you know, if you're in mom's moms with a Z lifestyle.com or KC shipt.com, you know how important it is to write down our weekly goals every Sunday night and Monday morning.
• 1:10
  Speaker 4: So today we're going to talk about friendships, friends, what is it?
• 1:14
  Speaker 4: It's a huge thing.
• 1:15
  Speaker 4: And probably over the last week it was like, duh, this is where I talk about how one of my, a level up, which is life coaching clients ask when he does warming, who, I mean, who are your friends?
• 1:26
  Speaker 4: I mean they're dah, dah, dah, dah.
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: And he is, he's single, no kids, you know, adults, professional life, yada, yada, yada.
• 1:36
  Speaker 4: So naturally his whole entire world looks different than somebody like me.
• 1:40
  Speaker 4: Um, and then I had a girl reach out, she was asking, she had a wedding coming up and said that her hubby, you know, he had tons of friends and that she only had a couple and ask what she thinks, what I, what I think she should do.
• 1:56
  Speaker 4: And um, you know, she said that I seem to like somebody.
• 2:00
  Speaker 4: And by the way, I hope they can hear me because I couldn't find my headphones on my old school headphones that has a microphone on it.
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: So I'm hoping that um, that you can hear me.
• 2:09
  Speaker 4: If you can't, you let me know.
• 2:11
  Speaker 4: If you can't, you let me know.
• 2:12
  Speaker 4: This will also be available home podcast on the hot moms lifestyle podcast.
• 2:17
  Speaker 4: So anyway, she was like, you know, you um, my personality and um, I'm pretty and dah, dah dah.
• 2:23
  Speaker 4: It seems like I have a lot of friends.
• 2:25
  Speaker 4: All right, so here we go.
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: 33 building an empire, multiple, a couple of businesses.
• 2:32
  Speaker 4: My husband's and also an entrepreneur.
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: He runs his own business.
• 2:35
  Speaker 4: We got two kids.
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: They are now you have three and four.
• 2:39
  Speaker 4: Over the past three and four years we have lost a mother.
• 2:44
  Speaker 4: We have a family issues.
• 2:48
  Speaker 4: Like in our family we have to take care of certain things in our family.
• 2:53
  Speaker 4: We have launched two businesses, one LLC, another part of that under the umbrella of our corporation launched books, programs.
• 3:07
  Speaker 4: We have opened new at Mojave, open new facilities.
• 3:10
  Speaker 4: I had a total hysterectomy.
• 3:12
  Speaker 4: I got a landed on how long I'll end up a couple of magazines, you know, professional life and our, what do you call it?
• 3:21
  Speaker 4: Personal life has been really slammed.
• 3:24
  Speaker 4: And when you have kids, you know what it's like.
• 3:26
  Speaker 4: You can't, I mean you can, it's really hard to hang out with people that do not have kids.
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: Couple of reasons.
• 3:31
  Speaker 4: So young kids, when you have little kids, you know they're on a schedule for the most part.
• 3:36
  Speaker 4: And if you're out past a certain time, know yeah, kids need, the naps are just babies and let's not even talk about it if the, if the chicks breastfeeding.
• 3:46
  Speaker 4: Um, so if you're going out with single Frans, hell, they don't even get started to fricking, you know, the town, the kids would get ready for bed.
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: So that just doesn't add up.
• 3:54
  Speaker 4: And you know, it's not fair to them.
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: People that don't have kids.
• 3:57
  Speaker 4: I remember what that's like and kids get on your fucking nerves, man.
• 4:00
  Speaker 4: Like I remember just being around little kids and then they'd talk in the mom talk cause I'd be like, beat his ass.
• 4:04
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 4:05
  Speaker 4: So, I mean it's just, it's just hard.
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: So then when you do have kids and you have, um, the hubby or wife, you know, all your tensions on that and everybody's busy and it's hard to link up schedules.
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: It's hard.
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: It's hard.
• 4:17
  Speaker 4: Dear God is hard.
• 4:19
  Speaker 4: And I wanted just to say about the friendship thing and how it goes into your body and health and fitness and everything else.
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: Not only do you know your, your friendships is kinda like a mirror reflection of your life.
• 4:30
  Speaker 4: If you wanna know why you're life shitty, look around you are who you hang out with.
• 4:34
  Speaker 4: And uh, and I'll just say like, I don't have any friends and when I, when I say that, here's what I mean, friends to everybody, it's different.
• 4:41
  Speaker 4: If you look up the definition, you'll see one thing and then like another type of friendship is this.
• 4:47
  Speaker 4: Alright, do I have friends, people that you know, we shoot the shit together.
• 4:51
  Speaker 4: She had man, like in the social media world.
• 4:53
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 4:54
  Speaker 4: If I wanted to go have a beer with somebody right now or just go meet somebody for lunch.
• 4:58
  Speaker 4: Yeah I could find somebody in my phone.
• 5:01
  Speaker 4: Um, now with what I've got going on in my life, I don't have time to do that.
• 5:05
  Speaker 4: I only have time right now.
• 5:07
  Speaker 4: My priority list is to take care of the clients that I have, which aren't like friends cause I know so much about them.
• 5:13
  Speaker 4: Um, and now you know I'm being paid.
• 5:15
  Speaker 4: I have to, I'm taking care of them.
• 5:17
  Speaker 4: So here, here's my train of thought and yes I got ratcheted nails on because half of them come off.
• 5:22
  Speaker 4: You gotta go get them done.
• 5:23
  Speaker 4: Here's how I think about stuff.
• 5:25
  Speaker 4: Why would you, why would you be hanging out with somebody that's not doing better than you and somebody y'all hang out with people that you're doing better than so you don't feel shitty about yourself cause you like projects.
• 5:38
  Speaker 4: That's why I posted that thing this morning.
• 5:40
  Speaker 4: That's why I post that they just morning on friendships and she part just pulled into the hazy, posted that thing this morning on friendships and what it means to have a toxic friendship because I have a lot of people that when I get them a life coaching, I'm like, okay, you're going to have to pull back the reigns on this friendship because more than in my hair I hear they're nothing more than energy vampire.
• 6:01
  Speaker 4: Like you don't even want to check your phone because they're just sucking off of you.
• 6:04
  Speaker 4: Like just bitching, constantly bitching and moaning and complaining and then half the people they want to like, how do you know they just won't fuck your spouse or they're not, they're trying to get one over on you.
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: Or even if their intentions are gold, um, I don't know.
• 6:22
  Speaker 4: Why not pay for therapy?
• 6:23
  Speaker 4: Like my thing is I'd rather pay for a therapist.
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: It's like professional.
• 6:27
  Speaker 4: They don't, they don't, there's nothing there to compete with me.
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: They win.
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: If I win, I'm now their client.
• 6:33
  Speaker 4: So I'm a testimony, so they are a little bit more invested than a friend.
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: My friend.
• 6:36
  Speaker 4: Could have a shitty day.
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: Odds are you, I mean, if your friend's doing like a ton better than you in every aspect of life, now they're just a mentor at this point.
• 6:45
  Speaker 4: So mentors and therapists, I'd much rather spend money and time with somebody like that.
• 6:50
  Speaker 4: Now we're talking to invested in me.
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: Right?
• 6:52
  Speaker 4: Oh, but Casey, you need somebody to care about you.
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: Well, I've got skipped my husband and then this morning I thought, okay, if I didn't have skip[inaudible], what would I do now?
• 7:01
  Speaker 4: I'll tell you what I do.
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: People see relationships like money, like it's impossible to get.
• 7:06
  Speaker 4: It's hard to find.
• 7:07
  Speaker 4: It's hard to get now here, here's my take on it.
• 7:10
  Speaker 4: I've been married for, we've been together since Oh five lived together for two years.
• 7:14
  Speaker 4: This year will be our 13th, 12th year.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: We've been here.
• 7:18
  Speaker 4: We've been married.
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: W I dunno, we got married.
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: No, seven.
• 7:21
  Speaker 4: Yeah, 12 years.
• 7:22
  Speaker 4: Been married 14 together.
• 7:25
  Speaker 4: Um, no other, no other dicks.
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: Since we've been married in this body.
• 7:31
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 7:31
  Speaker 4: I just said that.
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: So if I didn't have skip, if I did not have skip, here's what I would do.
• 7:37
  Speaker 4: I would probably be friends now saying if I didn't have skipped, we got divorced or he died, I'd probably be friends, friends, if you know, for girl time for that, a confidant on golden girls type thing, I'd probably have another female in the same industry in the same space.
• 7:52
  Speaker 4: Meaning she's running a business while being a mom and she's single.
• 7:57
  Speaker 4: I need to have that in common with her.
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: And she's going to higher places.
• 8:01
  Speaker 4: She does not have substance problems.
• 8:03
  Speaker 4: She's a pretty, you know, she's into personal growth.
• 8:05
  Speaker 4: We share a lot of the same common interests.
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: Cause if she's not and we show up and it's a damn a puking concession, like how bad her problems aren't all this.
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: Now I'm a fucking therapist.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: I don't want a therapist.
• 8:16
  Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying?
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: Um, so I'd probably have a friend like that.
• 8:20
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 8:20
  Speaker 4: And then I'd probably have, um, a little fuckboy toy, like just to get some ass, no strings attached.
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: Look, this is all I want.
• 8:28
  Speaker 4: And then if that point, if I was unhappy with that and I wanted more like a more in depth partnership, which takes a ton of time, not to mention those other ones do two half.
• 8:37
  Speaker 4: Y'all tried to build a business and you're out chasing ass.
• 8:39
  Speaker 4: I don't get that half of your married now chasing ass.
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: How you get time to do that with wife and the kids dear God, I have mad respect for that one.
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: So if I didn't have that and I wanted something deeper, I would find a partner.
• 8:52
  Speaker 4: And here's how you do that.
• 8:53
  Speaker 4: First of all, you need to half of you out there doing your dream weddings.
• 8:56
  Speaker 4: You don't even know what the fuck kind of man you want to go in the tux out.
• 9:00
  Speaker 4: You gotta write down that ideal in that dream man or woman or girl or whatever I did that.
• 9:06
  Speaker 4: I'm talking like how much money do you own to make?
• 9:08
  Speaker 4: How do you want them to act when you tell them the secret or tell him this, I'm in your vulnerable moments.
• 9:14
  Speaker 4: How do you want them to act?
• 9:15
  Speaker 4: How do you want them to, like you are writing down, you're talking to a magic genius.
• 9:20
  Speaker 4: What you have to do.
• 9:21
  Speaker 4: And you go and you write this out while taking therapy because if you're out, let's just say you're divorced.
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 9:27
  Speaker 4: Why don't you get divorced?
• 9:29
  Speaker 4: Well, you attracted them for some reason, so you got to make sure you're not still void in that spot.
• 9:34
  Speaker 4: So you attract another asshole or crazy bitch.
• 9:36
  Speaker 4: Like, you know what I'm saying?
• 9:37
  Speaker 4: So you need to start diving into personal growth.
• 9:40
  Speaker 4: If you need some help, you can hire me.
• 9:41
  Speaker 4: I'll be life coach.
• 9:42
  Speaker 4: We've got yelled the testimonies on this side, the guy.
• 9:45
  Speaker 4: So you just want to dive hard into therapy so you know yourself and you attract a partner that it's true.
• 9:49
  Speaker 4: A true partnership.
• 9:51
  Speaker 4: Um, so, so there, so there's that.
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: So when it comes down to friendships and fitness and health, who you hang out with, Matt, it's, it's, it's all part of it.
• 10:00
  Speaker 4: So like if you are hanging out with friends that aren't, they don't have the same goals or it's not in alignment with yours, um, that's going to be hard.
• 10:08
  Speaker 4: That's going to be hard.
• 10:09
  Speaker 4: That's going to be real, real hard.
• 10:11
  Speaker 4: And you know, I don't, I think maybe you may be like me if, if, if you're, um, a working mom professional, you know, you got that your, your careers up here, you've all, you ain't got your family and you're married, you're pretty busy, you're pretty busy.
• 10:27
  Speaker 4: So don't get down on yourself if you don't have any friends.
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: Um, meaning you don't talk on the phone every day to your girlfriend like, like, like, like, like a sister friend.
• 10:39
  Speaker 4: Um, yeah, there's that.
• 10:41
  Speaker 4: I think it's nice to feel comfortable with your alone time and your solitude.
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: It's needed.
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: A lot of women don't do that and that's why they feel so run down.
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: That's why he feels so run down.
• 10:51
  Speaker 4: It's okay to cancel plans, man.
• 10:53
  Speaker 4: It's okay.
• 10:54
  Speaker 4: So that's kind of my bit on that.
• 10:56
  Speaker 4: Um, this will be available on my podcast and for here, here, 24 more hours.
• 11:00
  Speaker 4: We also put it on YouTube.
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: So if you're not following the podcast, it's on iTunes and Spotify now and so on.
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: Something else that don't even know how to pronounce.
• 11:07
  Speaker 4: And it's a hot moms with a Z lifestyle.
• 11:11
  Speaker 4: Uh, we do hot mom's lifestyle.com if you are a woman and you like what I'm saying, you like, you liked the life aspect, holistic approach to help them fitness, come on over.
• 11:22
  Speaker 4: It's a free seven day trial or it's 27 bucks a month, one 97 annually or lifetime four 97 and we'd give you over$800 a digital product when you join or KC shipt.com if you want a little bit more, you get that one on one attention and for level of life coaching.
• 11:38
  Speaker 4: So I've only taken life coaching clients.
• 11:40
  Speaker 4: I only have three more spots for 2019.
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: So there's that.
• 11:43
  Speaker 4: If you want to reach out to me, go to KCA KC shipt.com and I will gladly talk to you.
• 11:49
  Speaker 4: So go this week, write down your goals, write down your relationship goals and a self check yourself.
• 11:56
  Speaker 4: You need somebody that does care about you, that's holding you accountable.
• 11:59
  Speaker 4: If you have a goal to lose 20 pounds this week, but you want to do X, Y, and Z, you need to have somebody who cares about you that is not trying to like trying to watch you fall.
• 12:09
  Speaker 4: Say, ah, you got to get back on track.
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: Okay, you feel me?
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: You feel me?
• 12:12
  Speaker 4: You feel me?
• 12:13
  Speaker 4: So look who you're hanging out with and it's okay.
• 12:15
  Speaker 4: Look, it's going to be hard when you kind of pull back from certain people and it does not make them wrong.
• 12:20
  Speaker 4: So please don't be like you're an energy vampire.
• 12:23
  Speaker 4: I need you.
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: Don't be like me cause that's how I have a thing.
• 12:25
  Speaker 4: So totally I have my fault.
• 12:27
  Speaker 4: Please go though five if all from, from that.
• 12:30
  Speaker 4: Um, so yeah, you could just pull back and be simple.
• 12:33
  Speaker 4: Say, look, I'm focusing on myself right now.
• 12:35
  Speaker 4: Uh, I wish you the best.
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: I hope you know they'll figure it out.
• 12:38
  Speaker 4: All right, how five I will see you this week.
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: Thank you.
• 12:43
  Speaker 4: Let me see what people are saying.
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: Alright, we'll talk to you soon.
• 12:50
  Speaker 4: Autumn says, I wrote it down with specific, went to match.com and created my Barbie man.
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: Oh my God, she's been married 20 years.
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: I love it.
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: And, and uh, autumn and Steve are very good couple and she made him on match.com is what she's saying.
• 13:02
  Speaker 4: And she wrote down that list dream man list or dream woman list.
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: That's what I'm saying.
• 13:07
  Speaker 4: Half of you don't even know what you want next month, much less than a partner.
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: And you're wondering why that you, um, that it's not fruitful.
• 13:15
  Speaker 4: Same thing in relationships and friendships.
• 13:17
  Speaker 4: You don't even know what she wanted a friend you don't even know yourself.
• 13:20
  Speaker 4: So dive in, dive into personal growth and finding out who you are and what you want, what you do not want.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: A boundary.
• 13:26
  Speaker 4: You know what they are, a boundary, what is okay and what's not.
• 13:29
  Speaker 4: Okay, set those up.
• 13:30
  Speaker 4: You'll be awesome.
• 13:31
  Speaker 4: You'll rock it out and be super successful.
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: I love you back.
• 13:36
  Speaker 3: Thanks for listening to the hot moms lifestyle podcast with KC ship.
• 13:40
  Speaker 3: Be sure to follow us at H M Z fitness, underscore or subscribe to KC ship on YouTube till next time.