Latest / Inner Work With MaryAnn Walker: Life Coach for People Pleasers / 151: How to Stop Doom Scrolling While Remaining Informed

Transcript

151: How to Stop Doom Scrolling While Remaining Informed · Inner Work With MaryAnn Walker: Life Coach for People Pleasers

• 0:20
  Well, hello and welcome back.
• 0:21
  My name is MaryAnn Walker and I'm the life coach for highly sensitive people like you.
• 0:25
  And today I just want to acknowledge that a lot of people are experiencing information overwhelm.
• 0:31
  It can feel a lot like drinking from a fire hose.
• 0:33
  It's too much.
• 0:34
  It's too fast.
• 0:36
  And it's just too much to process all at once.
• 0:39
  So today we're going to talk about finding that balance between consumption or the gathering of information and balancing that with rest and digest or taking time to just process and to recharge.
• 0:50
  Both of these things are important and only you can determine what it is that you need in the moment.
• 0:55
  And as we talk about rest and digest and consumption, I want you to really think about it in terms of when I go out to eat, how do I monitor what I'm taking in and notice the importance of also knowing when to stop so that you can rest and digest.
• 1:11
  So first let's talk a little bit about the importance of consumption.
• 1:14
  Consumption is very important.
• 1:16
  Just like with eating, we need to take things in and we want to be really conscientious about the things that we are choosing to consume.
• 1:24
  So if you're consuming a lot of garbage in your kitchen with no real nutritional value, then your health is going to suffer.
• 1:31
  Likewise, if you are consuming a lot of garbage on the news or on social media, then your mental health is going to suffer.
• 1:40
  And because watching the news or social media right now really can feel like drinking out of a fire hose, we're really being fed a lot of information all at once.
• 1:49
  And it's kind of like going to a buffet and being told, you must consume everything.
• 1:54
  That's really how it feels.
• 1:55
  Can you imagine that?
• 1:56
  Going into a buffet and being told you have to eat everything, there is no possible way.
• 2:02
  We would all make ourselves sick if we attempted to do that, right?
• 2:05
  We all joke about doing that, but no one's going to actually go into a buffet with the intention of consuming everything and trying a bite of every single item there.
• 2:14
  And let alone getting to eat it all enough that we can know exactly all of the ingredients and how it makes us feel and all these things.
• 2:21
  So it's really important to go into these buffets of information with your eyes wide open, being selective about what it is that you would like to consume.
• 2:31
  So let's talk a bit about when consumption is necessary, because it is necessary, right?
• 2:36
  We don't want to go through life living in ignorance.
• 2:38
  We want to be clear about what it is that's important to us and be able to carry on conversations with other people.
• 2:44
  So, really notice when the information is important and necessary.
• 2:47
  So, if it's directing your life personally, then you're going to want to consume that.
• 2:52
  For example, job security, specifically if you're a federal employee right now.
• 2:56
  That's something that you're probably going to be consuming a lot of information around.
• 2:59
  Uh, maybe it's different government policies or healthcare changes.
• 3:03
  And these may be changes that are happening on the national level or on the state level.
• 3:07
  But just kind of notice, okay, what things may have direct impact on me, because that can be a good indicator as to what things you might want to choose to intentionally consume.
• 3:16
  Another reason why consumption might be important is it can help to give us a sense of safety.
• 3:20
  If we kind of have a basic idea or basic understanding as to how it is that we need to prepare for something.
• 3:26
  So if we know something is going to be coming down the chain, then we can prepare for that mentally, emotionally, financially.
• 3:34
  Whatever.
• 3:34
  And so notice that too, that, okay, do I need to create that sense of safety for myself?
• 3:40
  Am I feeling unsafe right now?
• 3:42
  Maybe I need a little bit more information.
• 3:46
  Another reason to consume is to just stay informed.
• 3:49
  And this allows you to be a better advocate for yourself as well as for other people that you know and love.
• 3:54
  I know that my level of consumption is going to be vastly different from other people's level of consumption, but I know as a coach, when I'm meeting with my clients, I know what issues may be applicable to them in particular when they're coming to me in session.
• 4:06
  So I may choose intentionally to consume a bit more information around things that don't impact me directly, but they do impact people that I work with directly.
• 4:16
  And so I feel a duty and an obligation to be a bit more informed around these different issues.
• 4:22
  And so maybe you're seeking to better understand how something impacts you directly, or maybe a friend, a family member, a coworker, your next door neighbor, just kind of be a little bit more aware as to what's happening in the world around you.
• 4:33
  And as we've talked about here on the podcast before, that can also help you to increase your own personal levels of empathy and understanding as you are engaging with other people.
• 4:43
  So, let's talk about some examples of healthy consumption.
• 4:47
  Because we know that just binge consuming everything is not going to be helpful, so what does it look like to be a bit more intentional about our consumption?
• 4:55
  It might look like checking reliable sources.
• 4:58
  For me, I intentionally seek out a few select sources for information because I trust that what it is that they're giving me, they have the notes in there so that I can go into the research myself.
• 5:07
  They're also non biased.
• 5:09
  And so I can intentionally seek out those sources.
• 5:12
  And there are other sources that frankly, I've had to unfollow them or mute them in my feed.
• 5:16
  Because I know that it doesn't feel true and authentic for me, or it's not supportive for what it is that I'm working to create mental health wise.
• 5:24
  So look for reliable sources to help you to stay updated on issues that are important to you and those people that you care about versus just doom scrolling and consuming everything, right?
• 5:34
  That's the junk food.
• 5:36
  All right?
• 5:36
  Gather information intentionally rather than just passively consuming everything.
• 5:41
  So this is like walking into that buffet and knowing, okay, I do like all of these foods, but I'm going to be intentional about what it is that I'm going to eat.
• 5:48
  I know if I consume some of these things, I'm gonna feel sick afterwards, So be intentional about, okay, I'm going to intentionally have some of that and in this quantity, and then that will also give me the space where i can also consume this in this quantity, it's kind of building your own mental health plan around your consumption.
• 6:07
  You may also want to intentionally consume when it's learning with a purpose for yourself or others.
• 6:13
  So again, this is about your personal safety or the safety of those around you.
• 6:17
  It's about figuring out what are my next steps that I need to do in order to make these next steps in order to keep myself safe.
• 6:24
  You don't have to know the end from the beginning.
• 6:26
  You don't have to know what's going to be happening long term, but it can be very important to know just enough to keep yourself informed so that you can take your next step.
• 6:36
  So now let's briefly talk about some signs that you are actually over consuming.
• 6:41
  You may be feeling just like when you overeat, you may be feeling a little nauseous.
• 6:44
  You may be feeling scatterbrained and like you just can't think clearly.
• 6:48
  So notice if you're feeling mentally exhausted or emotionally drained, notice if you're experiencing increased anxiety rather than decreased anxiety, maybe you're more irritable, maybe you're feeling hopeless.
• 6:59
  These are signs that you are over consuming.
• 7:02
  So notice that the information, it might not actually be helping you to take action, but it might just be helping you to feel more stuck.
• 7:08
  You're not moving forward.
• 7:09
  It's not helpful for where you're at right now, because essentially you're experiencing a fight flight freeze response, right?
• 7:15
  You're kind of shutting down.
• 7:16
  You're experiencing those things.
• 7:17
  That's not productive to be taking in more information.
• 7:21
  So here are some signs that it is time to shift from consumption into rest and digest.
• 7:26
  Once you have enough information to make an informed decision, take a breather.
• 7:32
  Take a little break.
• 7:33
  It's going to be okay.
• 7:35
  When you notice that your nervous system is feeling overwhelmed and it needs a reset, Take a break.
• 7:40
  When you are experiencing your fight flight freeze response, your prefrontal cortex is offline.
• 7:45
  It's going to be really hard for you to make decisions.
• 7:47
  It's going to make it really hard for you to know what your next steps are.
• 7:49
  So notice if you're experiencing that fight flight freeze response and take some time to tend to your nervous system.
• 7:55
  This is a time when it is important to take that time for you to rest and digest so that your prefrontal cortex can have a little bit more time to come back online and that you can make those informed decisions moving forward and have that sense of personal safety.
• 8:09
  So now let's talk a bit about why rest and digest is essential.
• 8:14
  So essentially it helps you to process and integrate what it is that you've learned.
• 8:18
  We have all this information, and then the question is, so what are we going to do about it?
• 8:22
  When you take the time to rest and digest, it can bring that clarity.
• 8:26
  It allows that time, as we've talked about, to bring that prefrontal cortex back online so that you can make those educated decisions rather than just reacting emotionally as you're getting more and more information.
• 8:37
  It helps to prevent burnout and emotional overload to take that time to rest and digest.
• 8:42
  It supports the nervous system regulation, which makes it easier to engage with other people later and make more informed decisions moving forward.
• 8:51
  So some ways to rest and digest are to maybe consider taking a news or social media break.
• 8:57
  And this might look like limiting your exposure each day like, okay, I'm going to limit myself to whatever it is that's comfortable for you for 30 minutes or one hour of information a day or whatever it is that feels most authentic to you and most supportive for you.
• 9:10
  But maybe be intentional about, I am going to seek out these specific sources on these specific subjects during this specific window of time.
• 9:17
  And that's how I'm going to limit it so that I don't experience that overwhelm.
• 9:21
  You may also want to rest and digest it by spending time in nature.
• 9:25
  Again, this really helps the nervous system to calm back down so that you can see things more clearly.
• 9:31
  Unplugging really truly can make a difference.
• 9:35
  Another thing that can really helpful is engaging in creative activities or physical activities.
• 9:41
  Journaling, painting, exercising, or gardening.
• 9:44
  Then it really can help to provide that mental reset.
• 9:47
  And having a space for creative expression, be it painting, dancing, whatever it might be, it is a fantastic way to help you to process that information in the body.
• 9:57
  So that you can move forward.
• 10:00
  And honestly, as you make these really small changes, they really can have significant impact.
• 10:05
  So for example, I have a friend who stopped watching the news before bed and immediately noticed improved sleep quality.
• 10:12
  Somebody else, they took the weekend off of social media and they were able to go back to work on Monday feeling a bit more Refreshed and less reactive.
• 10:19
  I know this is something that's been true, especially for my federally employed clients.
• 10:24
  They're getting a lot of information on the weekends and it can feel like there is no space for reprieve.
• 10:29
  It can feel like there's no space to catch your breath.
• 10:31
  And so intentionally knowing that, okay, I may be getting some emails right now with some valuable information and I will make a point to check it Sunday evening or Monday morning.
• 10:40
  Um, that you do have some time to check in on those work emails can be really helpful.
• 10:46
  So setting those personal boundaries.
• 10:48
  You may also notice that as you take that time to rest and digest, it actually improves your relationships.
• 10:54
  When you are in information overload and you are experiencing that fight flight freeze response It's easy to go into these different engagements through that lens of defensiveness or anger and frustration, and it can negatively impact those relationships.
• 11:09
  So taking that time to rest and digest makes it more likely that you can sit in a conversation and listen and engage appropriately rather than engaging defensively or reacting emotionally.
• 11:23
  So again, you know what it is that you need most.
• 11:26
  So check in with yourself, be a little bit more conscientious, ask yourself the question.
• 11:30
  The cool thing about your brain is as soon as you ask your brain a question, it wants to answer it.
• 11:35
  So you just listening to this podcast and asking the question, what do I need more right now?
• 11:40
  Is right now a time when I need to consume and gain more information on a certain subject?
• 11:45
  Or for today, do I need to rest and digest?
• 11:48
  You know you best, ask yourself the question and see what it is that your body and your nervous system is telling you.
• 11:56
  There is a time for consumption and a time to rest and digest.
• 12:01
  Find that balance between the two of them and trust yourself to know when it is that you need to shift from one to the other.
• 12:08
  Take some time to ask yourself, am I gathering useful information or am I just feeling overwhelmed?
• 12:15
  Do I need to consume more in order to prepare?
• 12:17
  Because sometimes that is what's best.
• 12:19
  We need that information so we can know how best to show up or what it is that we need to prepare for.
• 12:23
  Or ask yourself the question, is now the time to step back and really process what it is that I'm hearing because I am in overwhelm.
• 12:31
  So for this week, pick a rest and digest activity and commit to it at least once.
• 12:36
  I know that for me this last Sunday, I realized that I was in overwhelm.
• 12:40
  And so I was very intentional.
• 12:41
  I am somebody who absolutely loves listening to audio books and podcasts.
• 12:45
  And I really am a consumer of all of the information and I knew that, okay, in order for me to be more productive next week, I just need to take a clean break for one day.
• 12:56
  I'm not going to watch any news.
• 12:58
  I'm not going to listen to any podcasts.
• 13:00
  I'm not going to listen to any audio books.
• 13:02
  I'm just going to take a day to intentionally just listen to music.
• 13:06
  I have a whole little Spotify playlist I've created for myself that just allows me to just be in that feeling space.
• 13:13
  And so all of the music that really evokes emotion in me, I add it to that playlist and I use that very intentionally to help me to release emotion.
• 13:20
  And honestly, it was so helpful for me that I think I'm going to do that moving forward.
• 13:24
  Just have Sunday be a day when I don't watch any news.
• 13:28
  And I just listen to music because it really made a big difference for me.
• 13:32
  So think about one thing that you could do to rest and digest and also be very conscientious about how much and of what sources you want to consume.
• 13:42
  Taking a break doesn't mean that you don't care.
• 13:45
  It means that you're prioritizing your own well being so that you can show up with a more clear mind and stronger and better than ever.
• 13:53
  So hey, if this episode has resonated with you, feel free to share it with somebody who might need it.
• 13:57
  Maybe this is something you want to have be a discussion that you have with your family around how can we set our own boundaries around consumption and resting and digesting.
• 14:06
  And also don't forget to subscribe here to the podcast and hey, if you would like some help and support.
• 14:10
  Come and work with me.
• 14:12
  I'm putting a link in the show notes where you can come and book a free consult call.
• 14:16
  This is just a 20 minute call where you and I can chat.
• 14:18
  It's completely free, no obligation, but you can come on a call with me.
• 14:22
  We can see if we're a good fit.
• 14:24
  We can see if you may want to move forward with me on one of my coaching practices, and I can honestly just coach you for 20 minutes.
• 14:29
  So come and check that out.
• 14:31
  It's completely free, no obligation.
• 14:33
  I look forward to working with you.
• 14:35
  All right.
• 14:35
  Well, I hope you have a great week and let's talk soon.
• 14:37
  Bye now.