Latest / Libido Lounge / What's REALLY Killing Intimacy in Our Relationships Today? with Laura How

Transcript

What's REALLY Killing Intimacy in Our Relationships Today? with Laura How · Libido Lounge

• 0:09
  The overwhelm of the demands in our western modern society.
• 0:14
  Career, kiss, house, how do I have time and all of that.
• 0:19
  But there's like this awkwardness, that first kiss when you were just dating.
• 0:24
  This almost like fear and
• 0:28
  Care, respect, generosity of spirits, the foundation of healthy societies.
• 0:42
  Start slowly.
• 0:43
  Start with a fifteen minute walk.
• 0:45
  Build up.
• 0:46
  We need to move.
• 0:47
  We are sexual beings, and you wanna experience total well-being?
• 0:53
  Orgasms like fireworks, like a physiological explosion of light and pleasure.
• 1:00
  Why would you not want to do that?
• 1:05
  Hey, everybody.
• 1:06
  Quick break at our episode to talk to you about our sponsor, My Libido Doc.
• 1:11
  One of the things that we truly believe is that great sex is available to everyone, but we just
• 1:18
  have to learn how.
• 1:20
  So head over to our site to get your free copy of our e book, Five Steps to Mind Blowing
• 1:28
  Orgasms and Romance.
• 1:31
  Get the quick and easy tips to turn your sex life around, rev up your engines, and fall in
• 1:38
  deeper love and passion with yourself and your partner.
• 1:41
  So if you just go to mysexdoc.com, you will find that e book there for download.
• 1:48
  Now back to our show.
• 1:50
  Hey everybody.
• 1:51
  Hey club members.
• 1:52
  I'm so excited to bring another guest to you.
• 1:56
  This is relationship expert counselor, relationship coach Laura Howe.
• 2:02
  Out of The UK, she does do international work though, so for all of you that are club members
• 2:07
  around the world, you can definitely reach out to Laura if you like everything that she says
• 2:12
  today.
• 2:12
  We are gonna talk about some cool stuff today.
• 2:14
  We're gonna talk about some of her work and her research, what are really the keys to a
• 2:19
  lifelong happy marriage, and how to rip the Band Aid off, how to go for it if you've been
• 2:25
  kind of out, if you've joined the club and you're, like, really out of the practice of
• 2:29
  being intimate with your partner.
• 2:30
  You join the club to start having sex again, and you're just like, how do we be in to rip
• 2:35
  the band aid off and go for it?
• 2:37
  So thank you, Laura, for being with me on another episode.
• 2:40
  Thank you for having me.
• 2:42
  It is my pleasure.
• 2:44
  Let's jump right in.
• 2:45
  So let's talk a little bit about keys to follow for lifelong happy marriage.
• 2:51
  So what are some of the foundational things with, you know, with intimacy and otherwise, I
• 2:56
  should say with sexual intimacy and otherwise, what are some of the things that you 've seen
• 3:00
  that are like, these are the the things that are just essential to follow for happy long
• 3:05
  term love and success in that?
• 3:09
  That's a great question.
• 3:10
  So I would I would start with with things like care and respect, the the kind of generosity of
• 3:23
  spirit.
• 3:24
  So you kind of want to think about about more than whether your partner is good to you.
• 3:34
  You want to be thinking as much, at least, about whether you are a good partner, you know?
• 3:40
  And I think that we've perhaps gone a little too far towards the taking care of myself.
• 3:51
  You know, everybody's talking about self care and I'm an advocate of self care.
• 3:55
  It's not that I'm smashing or damning self care.
• 3:59
  Obviously, self care is important.
• 4:01
  But I think perhaps people don't think quite enough about whether they are a good partner.
• 4:08
  You know, I think the best relationships are built upon trust, and honor.
• 4:16
  You know, you want to think about whether the the actions that you take, lead your partner to
• 4:23
  feel safe and seen and secure and valued, you know?
• 4:29
  So I think how we live, how we behave really matters.
• 4:34
  I think that you want to be you want to be attractive to your partner, you know?
• 4:41
  So so you need to take care of yourself physically.
• 4:45
  You need to take care of yourself emotionally.
• 4:49
  You need to ideally be growing as an individual.
• 4:54
  If you want your relationship to stand the test of time, you are continuously of interest.
• 5:05
  That of course comes with people who are growing.
• 5:08
  If you're both on a continuously mutual growth journey, you stand a much greater chance of
• 5:18
  remaining attracted to one another.
• 5:20
  You know, you kind of want to bring, you know, and it's it's a cliche term, isn't it, that
• 5:24
  bring your best self to the relationship and it makes me feel a bit like it's a bit vomit
• 5:29
  inducing.
• 5:30
  But I like to think of and it's not mine, but you want to be the you know, if you're a man,
• 5:35
  want to be the best the best of men.
• 5:39
  You know, if you're a woman, want to be the best that a woman can be.
• 5:43
  You know, you want to be sane and healthy.
• 5:47
  You know, you want to be living your a game, you know, because that that is you know, that's
• 5:52
  what everybody wants from their partner.
• 5:54
  Everybody's happy to say that's what they want, you know, that's what they're looking for,
• 5:57
  that's what they expect, but perhaps not quite so much conversation about whether you yourself
• 6:03
  are that.
• 6:04
  Yeah.
• 6:05
  So it's be the person you wanna be with essentially is is some of that.
• 6:09
  Yeah.
• 6:09
  And I appreciate what you're it is.
• 6:12
  It is.
• 6:12
  And I think the, you know, the confusing thing perhaps to people in listening to this is and
• 6:18
  it's like, okay.
• 6:19
  Well, how do we manage, right, in relationships?
• 6:22
  So it's like, well, care for the other person is what you're saying in some ways around we've
• 6:27
  gotten to a point where we are, say, emphasizing more self care than care for the
• 6:33
  partner.
• 6:34
  At the same time, self care is, like, in part of how we bring our a game to, you you know, to
• 6:40
  the partnership.
• 6:41
  So, you know, so it is a little tricky.
• 6:43
  Right?
• 6:43
  And and I'm wondering if you have any advice for anybody because I think one of the biggest
• 6:48
  things people that run into, you know, people when they hear stuff like this is, okay.
• 6:52
  But but, like, how?
• 6:54
  Like, how from a standpoint of, well, I'm taking care of my career, and I'm taking care
• 6:59
  of the house, and I'm taking care of my kids, and I'm trying to take care of myself, but I
• 7:04
  can bring my a game, and then how do I have time in all of that, you know, I think is what
• 7:09
  our listener could be asking themselves.
• 7:11
  Like, how do I really have time in all of that to live in this way where then I also have the
• 7:16
  time to put into my relationship?
• 7:18
  Like, I feel like one of the ways that I see people struggle so much is, like, the overwhelm
• 7:26
  of the demands in our western modern society is, like, the overwhelm of the demands.
• 7:31
  So how do we begin in that to create the the time and the space to both care enough for
• 7:38
  ourselves to be able to bring our a game, but then not over care for ourselves in a way that
• 7:43
  we're not having the time, you know, to put into our our partnership?
• 7:47
  So what is do you have any advice for people around that?
• 7:51
  Well, that's, you know, that's the that's the task, isn't it?
• 7:55
  And maybe that sounds a bit harsh, but it is hard.
• 7:59
  You know, that's that's one of the keys the keys of success, I think, is is I visualize it
• 8:05
  like a pie chart.
• 8:06
  I think of my time and my attention as a as a pie chart because obviously you have limited
• 8:12
  limited time and limited energy, don't you?
• 8:17
  And part of the the keys to success is is working out how you split your time and energy
• 8:27
  so that it is balanced across all of the areas of your life that you've chosen.
• 8:34
  See, this is the way I see it.
• 8:35
  I chose to get married.
• 8:37
  I chose to have a son.
• 8:39
  I chose to have we have a dog now.
• 8:42
  You know, I've got a house.
• 8:44
  I'm also a therapist, and then I've got the amount of time that I need to look after my
• 8:49
  body and to look after my mind.
• 8:51
  Like these are all things that that fall on.
• 8:54
  They're the burden of responsibility, and, you know, we're all in the same boat.
• 9:00
  It's not that it's not that one person has, you know, unless maybe if you're single, but then I
• 9:06
  guess you've got the burden of loneliness and the stuff that comes from that.
• 9:09
  So so I think that that that the capacity to to make sense of all of that stuff is part of
• 9:19
  whether you whether you've you're basically ultimately doing a good job with your life or
• 9:25
  not, you know?
• 9:27
  So so yeah, maybe that sounds too harsh but I don't think so.
• 9:32
  It's just the way that it is.
• 9:33
  So I know I know I've, you know, because I because I'm I'm paying attention to how my
• 9:40
  husband is doing.
• 9:41
  I'm paying attention to how my son is and the dog, you know, and my clients.
• 9:48
  So that's part of my job as as I'd argue as an adult, you know, it's one of the I would say,
• 9:55
  it's one of the the principles or facets or assets.
• 9:59
  I can't think of the right word, but it's one of the yes.
• 10:02
  It's one of the things that kind of determines whether you're an adult or not, is whether
• 10:07
  you're doing a good job at all of the things that you've taken on.
• 10:10
  Yeah.
• 10:11
  Yeah.
• 10:12
  Yeah.
• 10:13
  Yeah.
• 10:13
  I like the pie chart image.
• 10:14
  I think that's actually could be a helpful exercise for people is really, you know,
• 10:19
  looking and saying, okay.
• 10:20
  Well, how many hours a day, like, do I can I put into this and put into that and put into
• 10:25
  that and actually, draw it out?
• 10:27
  Because I like, where I see people struggle is, like, like, without a plan.
• 10:32
  Right?
• 10:32
  It's, like, without a plan of when we're gonna go to the gym, without a plan of, like, oh,
• 10:36
  this is when I'm gonna help the kid with the homework, without a plan of this is when we're
• 10:39
  recording our podcast.
• 10:41
  Like, it's really hard to put it, you know, put it into action.
• 10:44
  So I think that's maybe a a cool action step for people is, like, putting this into a pie
• 10:49
  chart and saying, like, okay.
• 10:50
  Twenty four hours in the day, seven to nine of them, you're sleeping.
• 10:54
  That's part of your pie, and, like, where are the other pieces of of your pie?
• 10:58
  I actually think you're inspiring me in that that idea.
• 11:02
  So I love love love that.
• 11:04
  Yeah.
• 11:05
  Please.
• 11:05
  Yeah.
• 11:05
  You need you need to you need to make sense of what your priorities are as well.
• 11:10
  So my husband, I mean, this is probably will be considered traditional and perhaps old
• 11:15
  fashioned, but but for me for me, my husband's at the top of the pile.
• 11:19
  He because because I because we've been together a very long time and he is incredibly
• 11:24
  valuable to me.
• 11:25
  My life works.
• 11:28
  I mean, I I'd I'd struggle to do it justice by speaking about it, how much better my life is
• 11:33
  as a result of his presence and the strength and the the skill and the intelligence.
• 11:40
  I mean, the that he's he's an incredibly capable I wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't
• 11:45
  for him.
• 11:46
  So so that's just one thing.
• 11:48
  So he's at the top, and I also think that his health is is plays a major role in my son's
• 11:54
  health and our health as a couple plays obviously a major role in the health of my son.
• 12:01
  So so I kind of I'm very careful to make sure that when thinking of that pie chart that the
• 12:07
  sliver that is my work doesn't crowd him out.
• 12:11
  And I'll know when that's happened because he starts to look grumpy.
• 12:15
  You know, he starts to feel like he hasn't quite got enough of me as he would like.
• 12:20
  So yeah, I think that this this
• 12:22
  Just a quick break to let you know that eighty percent of women do not have orgasms from
• 12:27
  vaginal intercourse alone.
• 12:30
  So many people are not having the type of sex that is healing, brings them closer, that
• 12:35
  brings them more connected, that is full of so much pleasure and passion that it can build
• 12:41
  bones, reduce stress, help serotonin, bring happiness, lower anxiety, improve sleep, and
• 12:47
  build a better connection with your partner.
• 12:50
  That is what hot and modern monogamy is, is modern monogamy that brings in all of that past
• 12:57
  Kind of and that's why I'm a fan of solitude, I should say, because where I make sense of all
• 13:02
  of this stuff is time alone, no distractions, no devices, no people, no conversation, no
• 13:09
  noise, you know.
• 13:10
  So so I am constantly monitoring all of these things because I consider it my job as a as an
• 13:18
  adult to do so.
• 13:20
  Yeah.
• 13:21
  Yeah.
• 13:21
  The other thing you're making me think of when you describe this and you describe your
• 13:26
  relationship with your husband is how many people, like like, for everybody that's
• 13:30
  listening, like, an interesting exercise I think would be to, before you even draw a pie
• 13:34
  chart, like, make a list of your top priorities and rank them, you know, priority number one,
• 13:39
  priority number two.
• 13:39
  Right?
• 13:40
  And then what's super interesting, I think, from there is, like, okay, before drawing,
• 13:45
  like, okay, your ideal pie chart, draw a pie chart of what is actually happening in the
• 13:50
  moment.
• 13:51
  Yeah.
• 13:51
  I Space based iron.
• 13:52
  I love it.
• 13:53
  I suspect that, like like, what we're talking about here, like, when we have if we start with
• 13:58
  our, like, priorities, right, or I'm like, okay.
• 14:01
  And, like, your example has been number one.
• 14:03
  And if people have like that, I suspect when they draw, people draw their draw their pie
• 14:07
  chart of their life.
• 14:08
  I'm gonna do this tonight and actually check myself.
• 14:11
  Uh-huh.
• 14:12
  Right.
• 14:13
  There'll be there might be this discrepancy of, like, whatever is at the top is actually maybe
• 14:17
  getting the smallest sliver of the pie.
• 14:19
  And that's a really important thing from a standpoint of, like, your fundamental idea here
• 14:25
  on care and that being one of the keys.
• 14:29
  That's right.
• 14:30
  That's so interesting.
• 14:32
  Okay.
• 14:32
  So you also mentioned generosity, right, as one of the the foundational keys.
• 14:37
  Correct?
• 14:38
  So let's talk a little bit more about that, because it's like can you just talk a little
• 14:42
  bit more about, like, in the context of a marriage or a long term relationship, like,
• 14:47
  what does that all mean?
• 14:48
  Because it's just like a buzzword.
• 14:49
  I wanna go deeper.
• 14:51
  So
• 14:51
  so I don't know about you, but one of the greatest pleasures in my life is to see other
• 15:00
  people well.
• 15:02
  You know, to other people when other people thrive, when you when you offer people the
• 15:09
  support they need or, you know, you you I don't know, when you're available to them in the way
• 15:15
  that they need you to be available.
• 15:17
  We need each other, you know.
• 15:19
  We we we the the psych the field of psychology worked that out.
• 15:24
  We've, you know, we've been studying human development for long enough now that we know
• 15:29
  that in all and, you know, loneliness and isolation kills.
• 15:32
  We know that.
• 15:33
  So we we are social creatures.
• 15:35
  We've literally got brains and bodies wired around connection.
• 15:40
  If we got if we can't connect, then we don't thrive.
• 15:43
  So so for me, generosity is is just it's sort of like if you're a generous person, you're in
• 15:51
  order.
• 15:51
  You're in line with nature's rules.
• 15:57
  I have worked out over the years that when I give people what they enough of what they like,
• 16:02
  it's not about being perfect.
• 16:04
  I'm not a perfect mother or a perfect wife or a perfect dog owner or a perfect therapist.
• 16:10
  I make mistakes.
• 16:11
  I get stuff wrong.
• 16:12
  Sometimes I'm not quite as available as perhaps I would like to be, but more more the time more
• 16:19
  more, you know, I aim to do to do to be available, to do a good job in that in that in
• 16:29
  that way, and to to to offer my gifts to other people.
• 16:34
  And that is, I mean, that is that's the I would argue that that's the that's the the kind of
• 16:42
  the the structure or the foundation of healthy societies.
• 16:47
  If people have enough from the people around them that they feel fulfilled, that they feel
• 16:55
  valuable, they feel looked after, loved, cared for, that they are, you know, they experience
• 17:03
  well-being and people who are well are in turn available to offer their gifts elsewhere.
• 17:10
  So I think that it's just a beautiful trait.
• 17:14
  It's something to meditate on.
• 17:15
  It's something to consider, you know, to to to give to give what you can, you know.
• 17:22
  And in order to be very generous, you of course have to you have to have an amount of
• 17:28
  generosity for yourself in the bag.
• 17:30
  So it is that balance between, you know, you you strengthen yourself, so you take care of
• 17:36
  yourself so that you are fully functioning, and then you give you give what you can to the
• 17:41
  people that you can.
• 17:43
  Yeah.
• 17:44
  Yeah.
• 17:44
  I think it's another thing is, like, that that fine line.
• 17:48
  Right?
• 17:48
  Because it's so it's so we have to be so cautious, I find, sometimes from a standpoint
• 17:54
  of this pie chart, of this energy and all that, of, like, where is that point of generosity
• 17:59
  where all of a sudden it depletes somebody so much that, like, okay.
• 18:04
  You're giving, giving, giving, then it's like, well, you're so depleted that maybe you're
• 18:07
  hyper reactive, and you're not responding well to life.
• 18:10
  And that I think what you said around generosity to yourself is like really, I just
• 18:16
  wanna, you know, key in on that because I do think that's a huge thing, and it's back to the
• 18:20
  whole like, where's that fine line between enough self care versus over self care that
• 18:25
  you're not being generous to
• 18:26
  Enough Right.
• 18:29
  Exactly.
• 18:30
  It's very isn't it?
• 18:32
  It is.
• 18:33
  It really is.
• 18:35
  So let's talk now about I wanna briefly cover this idea of somebody that has not had sex, not
• 18:42
  been intimate for a long time, and, you know, there's there's various reasons for this.
• 18:47
  So we talked about part in part one that we'll have part one everybody under the video, in the
• 18:53
  show notes from today as we always do.
• 18:56
  But in part one, we had talked a little bit about, okay, well, why do people stop having
• 19:01
  sex?
• 19:01
  Why do relationships, you know, start to struggle, what's really going on there, and we
• 19:07
  discussed a few reasons, but there's many.
• 19:09
  So the question is, once people have, you know, realized this, like, do people start, like,
• 19:16
  kinda ripping the band aid off and saying, like, oh, like, we're gonna start having sex
• 19:19
  again after long periods of not because so many couples I've talked to, there's, like, this
• 19:25
  awkwardness.
• 19:26
  Right?
• 19:26
  And it's almost like this almost like fear in some ways that can be even more, like, intense
• 19:31
  than, like, that first kiss when you were just dating around, okay, somebody that's become
• 19:36
  just a roommate, how do we how do we just, like, go for it?
• 19:40
  What is the advice on that?
• 19:43
  Well, I like to think of it in the same way that I think about exercise.
• 19:47
  You know, you you I'm sure you have also met plenty of people who have just not they're not
• 19:51
  exercising.
• 19:52
  They haven't exercised for ages.
• 19:54
  You know, they feel really low that, you know, their their their self esteem is not
• 19:59
  particularly great.
• 20:01
  And what you would do with somebody in that position is urge them to start with something
• 20:06
  that isn't too terrifying.
• 20:08
  Start with a fifteen minute walk.
• 20:13
  What you probably wouldn't suggest is that they go out and run a marathon in a week.
• 20:18
  You would encourage them to build up, start slowly.
• 20:24
  But what you would say is make a start because because in order for a for a for a human being
• 20:32
  to be fully well, they need to move.
• 20:35
  We need to move.
• 20:36
  Build up, you know, we we rapidly become unwell if we don't move vigorously.
• 20:45
  And, you know, it's a sort of daily basis, that's the reality is you don't get fit, you
• 20:52
  don't get you don't even get, know, in order to get a little bit fit, have to do quite a lot,
• 20:58
  you know, and you have to learn to the you have to learn to go through these these discomforts,
• 21:03
  you know, you're gonna suffer along the way.
• 21:05
  And in fact, the fitter you get, the more you're going to suffer.
• 21:09
  Know, and you have to you have to align yourself to become athletic, to become
• 21:15
  physically fit.
• 21:16
  You have to align yourself with this with the discomfort of of what it takes to get and
• 21:22
  remain fit.
• 21:23
  And you need to you need to recognize that that's something that you're gonna have to do
• 21:28
  more or less every day and you're gonna need to do it for the rest of your life and and getting
• 21:34
  in, you know, having a temper tantrum about that and selling is not gonna make any
• 21:37
  difference, you know.
• 21:38
  And you're you're either gonna suffer the the difficulty of getting and and staying fit or
• 21:44
  you're gonna suffer the consequences of not doing that, which let's be fair, are dreadful.
• 21:49
  Being being unfit is a miserable existence.
• 21:53
  I've been both and and you know, not for I haven't been unfit for a very long time because
• 21:58
  I got sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.
• 22:00
  I got sick and tired of not liking myself, not enjoying not enjoying being in this glorious
• 22:06
  body that that that I got given.
• 22:08
  So I feel the same is true for sex.
• 22:11
  It's like it's it, you know, it can be a little awkward.
• 22:15
  It's, you know, I don't know.
• 22:18
  There's something because you're going to have to be vulnerable.
• 22:20
  You're going to expose yourself.
• 22:22
  Might have to try new things and go to new places, but you want to kind of align yourself
• 22:30
  with that because to be a non sexual person, I'm sorry, that's just not a better choice.
• 22:37
  You know, I think you can see it on people.
• 22:41
  You know, I don't mean to be mean and and I really am not being mean, but I think you can
• 22:46
  see a person that you begin to wear it in the same way that you wear, you know, poor
• 22:54
  lifestyle choices in the physical domain.
• 22:57
  I'd argue you can see psychological dysfunction too.
• 23:03
  So yes, I'd say do what you have to do, start slowly, align yourself with the fact that it's
• 23:10
  going to be uncomfortable, but it'll be totally, totally worth it.
• 23:16
  And it's again, it's it's about moving towards a natural order.
• 23:21
  We are sexual beings and you want to experience total well-being?
• 23:27
  You've got to be having sex and plenty of it.
• 23:30
  Was saying to my husband this morning, an orgasm is like fireworks.
• 23:35
  Know, that's what it feels like to me.
• 23:37
  It's like a physiological explosion of light and pleasure and and like you forget
• 23:45
  everything.
• 23:45
  It's amazing.
• 23:47
  And like, why would you not why would you not want to do that?
• 23:51
  Yeah.
• 23:52
  Yeah.
• 23:53
  It's so well said.
• 23:54
  I think in so many ways as humans, we are so oriented to motivation towards comfort and
• 24:03
  running away from discomfort.
• 24:05
  Right?
• 24:05
  So I think what you're saying is so well said, I'm like, okay.
• 24:08
  Well, this might be awkward.
• 24:09
  This might be uncomfortable.
• 24:10
  It's like like there's a lot of good things like exercise, like you described that.
• 24:14
  Like, sometimes it's, like, not the most comfortable thing, but it's worth it for the
• 24:20
  results.
• 24:21
  And, like you said, the end result of orgasm with pleasure beyond anything else that largely
• 24:28
  we get to experience as humans, it's worth it.
• 24:33
  You're worth it.
• 24:33
  Your relationship's worth it, and sometimes it's just getting comfortable with the
• 24:38
  uncomfortable is a really good first step.
• 24:40
  Yeah, totally.
• 24:41
  And I think another thing to add to that is that I wouldn't want to withhold that from
• 24:44
  somebody else, you know.
• 24:46
  So particularly particularly to the the people who are, you know, the the contract is, you
• 24:52
  know, whatever you call that, whether you're married or whether you've agreed to a
• 24:56
  monogamous relationship, to kind of withhold that from somebody else, to withhold those the
• 25:02
  benefits that come as a result of of, you know, of sex.
• 25:06
  The the the the many health benefits that result in regular, enjoyable, you know, sex.
• 25:15
  It it just feels it feels, again, it feels unhealthy.
• 25:19
  Yeah.
• 25:20
  Yeah.
• 25:20
  I love it.
• 25:21
  Well, thank you again for being with us on this episode, and can you just tell us every
• 25:27
  everybody again how to get ahold of you and, you know, and who you work with and and all of
• 25:32
  that?
• 25:33
  So you can find me at laurahowe.com, that's my website, or you can find me on YouTube.
• 25:39
  I work with couples and individuals.
• 25:43
  If you want to, if your relationship is struggling, whether whether with yourself or
• 25:49
  with your partner, then then I I'd be I'd love to hear from you.
• 25:55
  I tend to be quite good at it.
• 25:57
  That sounds so not very humble but, it's it's work that I love.
• 26:01
  I love.
• 26:02
  I love.
• 26:02
  I mean, there's just nothing nicer than than, restored health.
• 26:07
  Seeing whether that's, you know, with within someone's relationship with themself or whether
• 26:13
  the the restoration is happening in their relationship.
• 26:16
  It's it's a tow it it's a total pleasure and privilege to work with people whilst they do
• 26:23
  that.
• 26:23
  Amazing.
• 26:24
  And we'll have that in the notes under this video, like part one, as as well as part one,
• 26:30
  so you all can hear Laura's first interview as well.
• 26:33
  And thank you so much club members, and thank you again, Laura, for being here with us.
• 26:38
  My pleasure.
• 26:39
  Total pleasure.
• 26:40
  It's been such a lot of fun.
• 26:41
  Thanks for having me, Diane.
• 26:43
  Wonderful.
• 26:43
  Alright, everybody.
• 26:44
  We'll see you soon.
• 26:48
  Thank you for listening to the Libido Lounge.
• 26:51
  Please don't keep me a secret.
• 26:52
  Please share this with your friends.
• 26:54
  You can find me on YouTube, on Instagram, as well as how to work with me at mylibidodoc.com.