Latest / Success Story with Scott Clary / Lessons - Overcoming Negative Self-Talk | Deborah Driggs - Actress, Model & Life Insurance Specialist

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Lessons - Overcoming Negative Self-Talk | Deborah Driggs - Actress, Model & Life Insurance Specialist · Success Story with Scott Clary

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  The last thing that I wanted to talk to you about, and I thought it was an interesting
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  thing that you mentioned.
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  I think it's something that a lot of people, obviously, everybody struggles with this to
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  some extent.
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  But you said, and you've touched on this a bit already.
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  So I don't want to make it seem like you haven't spoken to this, but breaking through
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  negative self-talk, you've done this again and again over your life.
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  That's really how you've invented yourself.
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  And I think that's such a noble thing to speak to because everybody deals with this.
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  So what are your recommendations, tips, insights on breaking through that negative self-talk
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  in anything that you do in your life?
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  To name it, to name that person in your head, to name that person, oh, whatever it is,
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  to name it so you can tell it, thanks for that thought today, but now you can go away
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  because this person's taken over, and I'm in charge, and I think that when you give
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  it a name or you give it a, you make it so it's yours, you own it.
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  And so we're all going to have negative talk.
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  There's just no getting around it.
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  There are going to be days where we wake up, where we don't want to get out of bed, we
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  just want to pull the covers over, we just want to go, you know what, today's just not
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  the day.
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  It's not going to happen today.
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  And that's the voice that I go, oh, really?
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  Okay, really?
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  Well, let's talk, you know, really, you know, and to just make it funny, like, have a conversation.
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  Really?
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  Well, why do you think that?
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  Why do you think that, you know, people might go, she's talking to herself, she's absolutely
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  fucking lost it, and it's true, in a sense, you know, but I think that when you call something
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  out or you write it down, it makes it less of a negative thing because I will tell you
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  anytime that I've gotten into the deepest, right?
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  When you get into that deep funk or that deep, like, oh, I'm so irritated or upset by this.
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  And if you take out, and for me, this sits by me all day, it's just, you know, a yellow
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  pad, and I know it's so old school, but literally if something's going, I literally write down
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  all my thoughts about it and why I'm upset about it.
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  And all of a sudden, it's like it doesn't bother me anymore.
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  It's like, it's almost like, it's seriously, it's like doing yoga.
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  If I'm really upset before I do yoga, I can guarantee you I'm going to walk out of yoga
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  and go, what was I upset about?
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  So writing can be like that.
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  Writing can just be like, you know, talking to yourself through writing about what it is
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  you're upset about, lessens the negativity of it.
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  And I will say the other thing that I love a lot.
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  And when I say a lot, because I really feel like it works, is I write a letter to God
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  or to the universe or to angels, whatever you believe in.
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  You could write it to mother earth, I don't care.
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  You could write it to the plant on your desk, but you go, dear plant, and you write what
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  it is that's really upsetting you like, why am I so upset about this, this, this, this,
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  and this and this.
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  Then you write the second letter, dear debs, as if you're the plant.
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  Here's why you feel that way.
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  And you write it as if you're writing and you have all the answers because here's the
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  truth and here's what I believe.
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  The answers are inside of us.
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  We know.
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  And when you really take the time to do that two part letter, it's so tremendously insightful
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  because you're writing dear God.
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  I need help with this.
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  I don't understand why is this happening right now, what, whatever the situation is, and
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  I write the whole letter, please help me love Deb, turn the page, dear debs, this is
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  God, just got your letter.
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  Here's why this is happening.
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  And you write it as if you know it.
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  That is a, that is an exceptional self awareness tool.
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  I've never heard anybody recommend that, but I could see how that could be super powerful.
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  That's a really, that's a really smart, that's a smart idea, that's a smart, smart idea
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  because yeah.
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  Thank you.
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  Thank you.
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  I didn't come up with it.
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  I can't take full credit for it, but it was a recommend, it was a recommendation to
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  me.
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  I just do it a different way.
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  I just do it a little bit different.
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  I take it and do it the way I do it, but I will say this that everything, everything
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  that we talk about is, it's been out there for millions and millions of years.
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  So there's, you know, we just all look at it with a different perspective or a different
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  idea or a different spin on it, but we're all trying to figure out what works.
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  And I can tell you that two-part letter works for me.
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  It may not work for somebody else listening to the program.
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  They may be like, that's not going to work.
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  You won't know unless you try it.
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  And by the way, there's a lot of things that have been recommended to me that do not work
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  and I go, no, that didn't work for me, but this did.
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  And so I think that's kind of, that's kind of a fun thing because you can, I can take
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  from so many great mentors, coaches, masters, books, articles, blogs, podcasts.
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  There's so much available today that was not available, not even 10 years ago, you know.
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  And how beautiful is that that today we have accessibility to such amazing wellness?
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  Mm-hmm.
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  I mean, no, that's awesome advice.
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  I've never heard that one before, but I would suggest anybody who's listening, try it
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  because that could be something that you're struggling with a personal problem, a mental
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  health problem, a business problem, a family problem, whatever it is.
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  It's incredible at how often the answers are so simple.
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  It's just forcing you to come to terms with those answers by, you know, by asking yourself,
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  right?
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  Yeah.
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  After you write it all out like, what's wrong?
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  And then, then you write, you know, your name, dear Debs, and then you write, here's
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  why.
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  And then you write it, why, you know, it's, it's very, very telling because it really
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  does in some beautiful way.
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  I don't want to use the word forceful way because it's not a forced way if you do it
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  really from your heart, it's like really just really looking at your part in the situation
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  of why something's happening.