Latest / SisterSmart Leadership / 12: Five Qualities of Executive Presence

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12: Five Qualities of Executive Presence · SisterSmart Leadership

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  Have you ever felt like your ideas aren't being taken seriously or that you aren't
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  being heard when you speak up in meetings?
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  How about when somebody else presents the idea that you just
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  brought up to great approval?
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  These can be symptoms that you're lacking executive presence, because
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  EP is all about having influence.
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  Executive presence is defined as that something special about you that
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  tells people that you're in charge.
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  It's often hard to define and even harder to develop as a result.
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  Our clients have often heard that they need to develop executive presence,
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  but their manager can't describe it, and they don't know what they would
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  be doing differently if they had it.
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  So I understand this because even the scholars don't describe it well.
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  Sylvia Ann Hewlett is one of the experts in executive presence.
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  her model is communication plus gravitas, plus appearance.
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  But I think that's a little bit oversimplified myself because
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  gravitas is also hard to explain.
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  and This is important because women are often needing to improve this leadership
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  skill the most in order to get promoted.
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  This is because women tend to be promoted based on their performance,
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  whereas men most often get promoted based on their potential.
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  So women really need to develop that executive presence to seem like the
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  leader at the next level before they get the job as the leader at the next level.
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  I'm Jill Lavy, a career success coach, and this is Sister Smart Leadership, the
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  show that explores how women can rise from director to vice president and beyond
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  by fully leaning into their feminine energy as their biggest advantage.
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  Let's get you one step closer to the recognition and promotion you deserve.
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  At Sister Smartt, we use an approach from Bates Communications.
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  Their model is backed by research from over 20 years of experience
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  of coaching the world's top executives on executive presence.
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  And they use 15 facets to describe executive presence.
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  And I love this for women because it's important to develop this in an
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  authentic way that feels authentic to you.
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  And when you're using the 15 facets, you can pick and choose and find which
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  ones really fit your style, and you can optimize it to feel like it's you and who
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  you are at the court instead of trying to fit into this male leadership model.
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  At Sister Smartt we've broken down these 15 facets into five, five buckets.
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  Coach Sarah is with me here, and she's going to talk first about the first
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  quality of executive presence, which is, what we define as "how I operate."
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  Yeah, this is such a great topic and so I love that you're
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  breaking it down in this way.
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  It's so great to have a model to work off of, and so how I operate, that,
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  encompasses, that practical wisdom.
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  So how are we showing up in our leadership?
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  Are we staying attuned to industry trends?
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  Are we working on developing those leadership skills and
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  honing in on our strengths?
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  Are we being intentional?
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  Are we being consistent with the way that we operate?
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  Because that supports in building trust.
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  Having integrity, having good character, and showing that I can do the role.
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  I am thriving in this role, succeeding in this role and having impact.
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  And also, do I have vision?
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  Do I know where I'm going as well?
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  So how I operate consists of those qualities.
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  And so being able to step back and self-reflect on, how am I in this area?
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  Like are there areas that I would like to develop when it
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  comes to my daily operations?
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  That's really great because people need to be able to trust that
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  you know how to do what you do.
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  The next one is called How I Treat Others.
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  So this is really about your interactions with the humans around you.
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  So particularly your team members, but it can be beyond
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  your team the senior management people that don't report to you.
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  So what we think about when we talk about executive presence here is authenticity.
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  Do people feel like they're getting the real you?
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  It takes authenticity to be able to build trust with people.
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  This is a real key for leadership to be able to be successful in your
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  role, is to feel like they're getting the real you when they talk to you.
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  Then having concern for people like care and concern here is really important.
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  If people don't feel like you care about them at all and that, that you don't
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  see them as a human, like sometimes as particularly the higher up you go.
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  The less you actually have, interactions with people and it can be easier to,
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  and tempting to see people more as numbers and as productivity factors.
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  Really seeing that human in front of you is important here.
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  Assertiveness is another piece that it's not only about the softer
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  connecting skills, but it's also about standing your ground when you need to.
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  Because as leaders we often have to stand our ground and we often
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  have to assert ourselves and that little bit of forcefulness when
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  it's needed is Is really important.
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  And then resonance.
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  So this is that quality that you have with people that is attractive.
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  They like being with you and they like your way and your method.
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  And the next is how I present.
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  that encompasses our projected confidence.
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  And so what I mean by that, that's that magnetic force that people can
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  feel when they're in your presence, however, that projected confidence
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  is, if I feel butterflies on the inside, am I projecting that or am I
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  able to get my state to a calm space?
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  Can I manage those emotions that are maybe brewing inside me?
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  And so, thinking of it as what type of composure do you want to bring to
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  meetings, to presentations to challenging conversations because we have those, our
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  mirror neurons reflecting, the energy that we want to experience in the room
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  and other people can pick up on that.
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  So this is where we work on, some type of meditation or breath work.
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  When we're thinking about how do we want to show up in our professional space,
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  can we calm the storm down inside of us?
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  As women, we spoke about, performing at the next level.
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  So it's not like we want to fake this type of confidence, but we want to
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  truly embody these skills so that the projected confidence that we're bringing
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  to our professional life is the one that we're showing up in the next level.
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  So that real confidence.
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  So you might feel like I'm just 80% of the way there.
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  So being able to calm yourself in the middle of a storm or a hard
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  conversation is really important.
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  So you want to be noticing like, what am I projecting?
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  So if you notice the feelings inside of you, pause and take a moment to
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  really be intentional with how you want to show up in that conversation.
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  And the fourth one is how I connect.
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  Connecting with people is really important, and there's some
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  things that we can do to connect better with those around us.
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  So the first one is inclusiveness.
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  This is such an important skill for leaders and for so many reasons, not be
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  that go beyond executive presence, but it will give you better executive presence
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  the more that you want to bring others in.
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  You know that you can't do this alone and that you need others.
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  And so wholeheartedly committing yourself to inclusiveness.
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  In leadership coaching, we know that inclusiveness really builds
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  stronger companies and the better performance for the company.
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  So this is one I get really passionate about.
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  Also interactivity is another one.
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  You can't just sit behind your desk or in your ivory tower or whatever to
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  be the best leader that you can be.
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  Interactivity, it means management by walking around we used to call
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  it, it's a little bit more like management by checking in with people
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  these days in a virtual world, but really interacting with people.
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  Think about it as getting out from behind your desk and,
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  connecting one-on-one with people.
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  This is about having an open door policy.
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  Yes.
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  So that you're allowing people to come in and interact with you, but also making
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  space and time for you to go out and proactively seek people out and seek out
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  conversations that you wouldn't have.
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  These are the water cooler conversations and our businesses
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  today are A hybrid situation.
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  Some companies are all virtual that makes these things a little bit harder to do and
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  you have to be more intentional about it.
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  the third part of how I connect is about humility.
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  You can't connect with people truly without a sense of humility because it
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  really takes that to have that heart to heart connection and often humility
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  really helps you build respect too.
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  I find that this is one that usually women are really strong at.
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  Let's talk about the fifth quality of
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  how I look.
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  Yeah.
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  So last but definitely not least How we look is very important.
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  It's typically the first thing people will see about us.
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  They'll have an impression when they see us.
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  And so we want to look and feel our best.
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  Sylvia Hewlett talks about being polished, right?
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  It doesn't matter how attractive you are, doesn't matter if you're a size four.
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  It's when you look in the mirror in the morning after you've gotten ready
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  for your day, Am I reflecting back?
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  Do I care about myself?
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  Do I matter?
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  Am I putting energy into my physical wellbeing?
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  So looking at clothes that fit you and that make you feel and
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  look most attractive, right?
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  I know during the pandemic I've put on some extra weight and so I now find
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  clothes that really accentuate and fit best for me with where I'm at now.
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  And I don't need to be any certain size.
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  And I've seen many leaders all walks of life, like in different sizes
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  that when they put in some energy and effort into their clothing and into
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  their accessories, and their makeup and really pulling it together in a
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  way that when they leave the house, they feel proud about how they look.
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  Because let's face it, women are being judged all the time.
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  Well, let's look at politics or in the news and even on the media, right?
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  So we are judged different than, than our male counterparts, right?
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  And so we do want to, when we leave the house, be like, I really am
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  showing up for myself to the best of my ability with what I have
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  right now and feel good about that.
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  And I feel like that does affect our energy as well, ? It's going to
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  affect our confidence, our ability to connect, which is that charisma that
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  we have with other people, And also creating that encouraging, supportive
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  environment just by having, being in connection and relationship with other
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  people because they will remember us like how they felt about us.
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  Their perceptions when they see us and when they walk away,
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  how they will remember us by.
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  And so all of that comes from what they're seeing and what they're viewing of us.
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  We can't stop these judgments, right?
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  But we want to have the best judgment of ourself.
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  That comes with being polished to the best of our ability and know
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  that that is going to impact so many people as we, we are out in the world.
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  What's the fingerprint that we want to leave out there?
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  What's the brand that we want to leave with, with those that we're
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  interacting with on a daily basis?
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  So I do believe that even though it's number five, it's very important
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  because it's happening all the time.
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  And one thing I want to add to how I look and that charisma and energy
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  that we have is, be thinking about our habits as women and are they
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  supportive of good self-care habits?
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  So for example, am I getting enough sleep?
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  Do I know maybe if I'm deficient in a vitamin that I actually
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  need or a supplement that I need so that I could be at my best?
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  Am I eating good, healthy food so that I have the energy to go out in
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  the world and do the work that I do?
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  Am I taking care of my physical body, even if it's 15 minute walks
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  occasionally throughout the day.
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  Am I getting the physical fitness that I need so that I can be at my best?
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  Really think of how I look, like, so much more than just, how is my
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  hair and how are, how is my clothes?
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  There's the energy behind it as well and our good self-care habits as
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  well, because that is going to support how we are showing up in the world.
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  It's going to support our charisma as well.
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  Just show that we are taking good care of ourselves and that we matter.
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  It's so important how we, how we feel.
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  Inside is really how we're projecting ourselves outside.
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  And that reminds me of another client who went to a sales meeting and she had been
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  working hard on her executive presence and she kept wanting to look behind her to see
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  who people were talking to because they were talking to her with such reverence
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  and like that she was really a, a step above them and she didn't feel that way
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  inside, but she knew that, that they had shifted how they were seeing her.
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  So that's a really positive way that you can see your
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  executive presence shift as well.
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  Oh, that's a great story.
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  So we like to leave you with three shifts that you can make today.
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  And the first one that we would love for you to do is to find somebody
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  that can be your muse, who is someone that you could model yourself after.
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  That you appreciate how they carry themselves and the
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  kind of leader that they are.
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  Could be somebody that you know or that you don't know.
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  So it might be somebody in your company, but it may be somebody that is a leader
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  of another company that you admire.
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  The second one would be to pick one of the things that we've talked
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  about that you would like to improve.
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  And our third one would be to get some feedback from a mentor and now that
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  you know these five qualities yourself, what are you hearing from other people?
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  What are they seeing in you that you're doing well and that you could improve?
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  So if this resonated for you, I would love to hear in the comments, which of the
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  five qualities you'd like to work on most.
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  Let us know in the comments if you're watching the YouTube version, and
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  to remind you, it's how I operate, how I treat others, how I present,
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  how I connect and how I look.
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  You can download our private podcast on the seven step passport to a
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  promotion to hear more about how you can increase your executive presence
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  on the sister smart.com website.
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  The link is below in the show notes.
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  And if you're a female leader who has the ambition to rise up the ladder so that
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  you can have a greater impact on your world, subscribe on YouTube or wherever
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  you listen to your favorite podcast.
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  We cover the topics that women need to succeed in today's workplace, from
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  executive presence to communication, and there's so much more to
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  come if you come along with us.
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  Thanks so much for joining us.
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  We'll see you in the next episode.
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• 15:24
  from director to vice president and beyond, hit that subscribe button so
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  you'll get all the episodes to come and check out the recommended video here
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  to see how women are rising up without playing by the old rules that built these
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  male dominated industries and systems.