Latest / The Sober Creative Podcast / Episode 076 - From Drinking to Flour: Noelle Richards on Five Years Alcohol-Free, Skull Cakes, and Feeling It All

Transcript

Episode 076 - From Drinking to Flour: Noelle Richards on Five Years Alcohol-Free, Skull Cakes, and Feeling It All · The Sober Creative Podcast

• 0:01
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome, everyone, to The Sober Creative Podcast.
• 0:04
  SPEAKER_01: Every guest has done some version of the same hard thing.
• 0:09
  SPEAKER_01: They got honest about what alcohol was costing them.
• 0:12
  SPEAKER_01: Some quit, some cut back, some don't use a word for it at all.
• 0:17
  SPEAKER_01: What they share is that they're creating from a space that's actually theirs.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_01: I'm your host, Josh Woll, and I'm excited to bring you today's guest.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: Noelle Richards, six years ago, and their family became vegan.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: The goal was to heal Noelle from health issues they had been facing.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: Over time, the reason grew to include the animals.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: What started as a way to heal their body turned into a way to heal their mind.
• 0:43
  SPEAKER_01: And five years ago this month, Noelle quit drinking.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: Three years ago, they moved across the country to Portland,
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_01: hoping for a better life for their little family.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_01: They started meeting people and working with animal sanctuaries.
• 0:58
  SPEAKER_01: That led to baking for the sanctuary's bake sales.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_01: And the bake sales went so well that Noelle started a home bakery of their own,
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_01: Fox Club and Flour.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_01: Today, Noelle is an artisanal vegan baker whose treats sell out at markets and pre-order drops.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_01: They're also a member of The Sober Creative Collective.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: They're here to talk about the confidence those bake sales gave them
• 1:23
  SPEAKER_01: and the communities that helped along the way.
• 1:25
  SPEAKER_01: Please welcome Noelle Richards.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 1:31
  SPEAKER_00: That was so beautiful.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_01: That's so cool.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: I just love your story.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_01: We've pretty much known each other since I started this, and you've been a big supporter.
• 1:44
  SPEAKER_01: It's just so great to have gotten to know you and just
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_01: to see how much ass you're kicking with this bakery business.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: Selling out almost every weekend is crazy.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_01: It's so weird.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_00: It's wild.
• 2:05
  SPEAKER_00: But in watching all your stuff and the collective and watching it grow,
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_00: it's just like we're doing things.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: We're doing it. We're doing it.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_01: I think Sarah is there in the background.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_01: She's pressing the heart.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: So thanks, Sarah. Hey, Joe. Hey, Erin. Hey, Nina.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for being here, everyone.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you, everyone.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_01: Well, Noelle, tell me what childhood was like and when you started drinking and all that stuff.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: Walk us back to the early days of Noelle.
• 2:41
  SPEAKER_00: I started drinking at nine.
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_00: That's when I had scotch for the first time.
• 2:50
  SPEAKER_00: And it was supposed to be, I think, like, here, try this.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_00: And hopefully they don't like it.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_00: I had the other response.
• 3:01
  SPEAKER_00: I asked for more.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then from then on, I was snuck drinks all the time at all the parties
• 3:07
  SPEAKER_00: because we were always at parties.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_00: Everybody had parties.
• 3:11
  SPEAKER_00: So I just was snuck drinks all the time
• 3:14
  SPEAKER_00: and just hid it for a long time.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_00: And then when I became closer,
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_00: once I had my oldest at 17,
• 3:27
  SPEAKER_00: I And I could kind of like drink more because people thought it was more accepting
• 3:33
  SPEAKER_00: because I was a mom. So it's like no one thought of my age anymore.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: It was, well, I could get it anywhere. I was a parent.
• 3:41
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like when you're at the bar with your kid, no one cards you.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_00: So, yeah.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_00: And then it just kept going.
• 3:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I lived in bars.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_00: My oldest, her sixth birthday was at a bar because she wanted it there.
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, I wanted to change.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't want my kids being that anymore to gross me out.
• 4:06
  SPEAKER_00: And now that I have my youngest, I want to make sure she knows that you can change.
• 4:12
  SPEAKER_00: You can make mistakes, but you can change.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, I was way too young.
• 4:20
  SPEAKER_01: Well, so like you started at nine, but then at like, so like 10, 11,
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_01: like you were having it on a regular basis per se, or like when the parties were?
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, which was- A lot.
• 4:36
  SPEAKER_00: They were, you know, because everybody just was doing something.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_00: So it was pretty, probably almost every weekend it would be.
• 4:48
  SPEAKER_00: And you know I'm sure there were stretches, but yeah, it was it.
• 4:55
  SPEAKER_00: We moved to West Palm when I was in sixth grade, so like 11.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_00: So we didn't go down as much.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_00: So I kind of had like a break.
• 5:04
  SPEAKER_00: But I also started getting alcohol from friends at 14.
• 5:12
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah.
• 5:17
  SPEAKER_01: Do you feel like...
• 5:21
  SPEAKER_01: When you started to get into your mid-teens and adulthood,
• 5:25
  SPEAKER_01: do you feel like you were using it just for fun or was it to cope with things?
• 5:32
  SPEAKER_01: What was the reason with having it?
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: My grandfather, who was my best friend, died when I was nine.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_00: And a part of me went with him.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: He was Just my safety.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_00: And everybody was not the nicest to me. I was the black sheep.
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_00: I was always different.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: And he always saw me for me.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_00: My midmare and pit bear did too.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_00: But I clung to Rick.
• 6:08
  SPEAKER_00: Rick was like, that was my person.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: And after that, I just, I lost me.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I didn't gain it back till Last year, when I started, well,
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_00: when I started my journey is when it started, but last year is when I really,
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: or not even last year, what was it, May,
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_00: when I finally started, like, living as me,
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_00: me.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, I haven't,
• 6:39
  SPEAKER_00: I just sunk into this hole and just kind of drinking made it easier to
• 6:48
  SPEAKER_00: Just be around everybody because everybody else was drinking.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: So I kind of fit in and I didn't care about anything.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't like, I was fun and I didn't have to, I wasn't in my head.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: So it was a lot easier to deal with people and I have horrible anxiety.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_00: And so, and I've had it since,
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_00: I had my first panic attack when I was 13, when I was hospitalized for it.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then it helped being in public.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: Going out, I couldn't do without drinking.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_00: I couldn't go anywhere.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_00: I couldn't do anything without Xanax either,
• 7:43
  SPEAKER_00: because my stomach would be a knot,
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_00: so I couldn't function.
• 7:48
  SPEAKER_00: But those are not two things you're supposed to mix,
• 7:53
  SPEAKER_00: and I did, to function,
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_00: and that's not good.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: And at 13 that started, so that's a lot.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, I mean, so that, how many, like 20 years?
• 8:14
  SPEAKER_00: How long did you do that for?
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, because I, when we,
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_00: I stopped, I kind of stopped everything when we started our journey.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_00: So with six years ago, that's when we decided,
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_00: To start working on us.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah,
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_00: my 30th birthday is when I went on my journey of healing myself.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_00: And it was, my health was.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_00: Horrible at the time. We had no idea what was going on and I was scared.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, I need to heal me.
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_00: This is all stomach issues, which is usually because of anxiety and stress.
• 9:07
  SPEAKER_00: So I was like, I have to heal me.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_00: So we started, I started doing meditation.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_00: I started, um,
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_00: Just diving into that realm,
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: Alan Watts and Ram Dass were They helped me so much.
• 9:29
  SPEAKER_00: They pulled me out of a lot and made me see things in a different light.
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then Buddhism and that route I started seeing and started truly working
• 9:41
  SPEAKER_00: on inside and which helped me let go
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_00: of something I was holding on to for dear life.
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: Because after Rob died when I was 23,
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_00: I was on the bottom of the bottle.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't see up.
• 10:02
  SPEAKER_00: I was hiding it when we found out I had a diseased liver.
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_00: I was hiding my drinking from Nick.
• 10:12
  SPEAKER_00: I would go down to my parents and drink, and he didn't know I was still drinking.
• 10:18
  SPEAKER_00: I was supposed to be done.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_00: I finally was able to let everything go
• 10:25
  SPEAKER_00: and be able to work through everything
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_00: and not use a crutch.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_00: It's been a wild journey because I've had to face things that I didn't know I had
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_00: because I forgot about because that happened and I got to do it and I get to face it
• 10:47
  SPEAKER_00: and I do things that scare me like Moving across the country and having nothing
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: to fall back on.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_00: Not knowing anybody.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_00: Starting a business and doing this.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_00: Just doing things that scare me because I'm not going to let it stop me.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_00: I can do all these things because I can.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_00: And quitting gave me that courage to, okay, you did that.
• 11:19
  SPEAKER_00: What else can you do?
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_00: So now it's, all right, what else?
• 11:23
  SPEAKER_00: And it all started with just going, I'm done.
• 11:29
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't serve me anymore.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_00: That was a really cool feeling when I got there.
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_01: Oops, I'm going to press the heart buttons with everybody here and celebrate you.
• 11:46
  SPEAKER_01: That's so cool.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_01: That's so great. That's so great.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, okay, there they go again.
• 11:52
  SPEAKER_01: I'm going to press it more.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: We got red and blue.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_01: That's so much less.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_01: I love pressing the shit out of the heart, bud.
• 12:01
  SPEAKER_01: So inspiring.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's great, Noelle.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: It's so inspiring It's so different for everybody,
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_01: when it clicks
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: of like okay I'm ready because You know,
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_01: because you don't see it for the longest time until you're ready.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: Like, when do you feel like that was the moment?
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what was that moment like when you're like, I'm done with this for good?
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: I remember the exact moment.
• 12:39
  SPEAKER_00: We were on a camping trip, and it was a horrible trip. Oh, my God.
• 12:44
  SPEAKER_00: We call it Murder Baby Camp. Whole story.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_00: One day I'll tell you.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: We were on the trip and we were sitting
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: and I had a liquid death sparkling water
• 12:58
  SPEAKER_00: and I went, I don't need to drink anymore.
• 13:00
  SPEAKER_00: I'm done.
• 13:03
  SPEAKER_00: This is forever.
• 13:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I was finally able to say I was done for good because before I couldn't say that.
• 13:11
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, for now.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_00: And then I was like, It doesn't serve me anymore.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I remember just looking into the beautiful sky without any light pollution
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: and just feeling like the world opened up, like all the stars,
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_00: just like so many more appeared.
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: And it was like, yeah, you're done.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_00: You're free.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_00: You are free from that.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: Shackle that's holding you down.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_00: And it was an extraordinary moment.
• 13:46
  SPEAKER_00: And this was six years, five years ago.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you said this month, right? November?
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_00: October. I forgot.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_00: This is November.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: October.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_01: So wow!
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so it's been five years.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_01: And, what?
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_01: You don't quit and it's easy.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_01: And so what's it been like to be able
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_01: to be with the things that are challenging?
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's so much better.
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: I can feel things and actually feel them.
• 14:43
  SPEAKER_00: And...
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_00: That always scared me and was told it was wrong.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like, feel them.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_00: Feel everything.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_00: Because it's important.
• 14:59
  SPEAKER_00: It's telling you something and you're going to learn something from it. Feel it.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: Work through it.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_00: And just...
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_00: I can look at things so much differently.
• 15:09
  SPEAKER_00: Every challenge isn't the end of the world anymore.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: It's okay. That happened. Cool.
• 15:18
  SPEAKER_00: Like, yeah, it's frustrating.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: It might be whatever, but I can breathe through it.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_00: Perfect example, the other day, we got a nail into the tire and I had a market to be at.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: That would have set me through a next level.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Like I would have been A wreck.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_00: And I just was able to breathe.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I was able to breathe.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: Never could do that before.
• 15:45
  SPEAKER_00: And just be like, okay, let me figure this out.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: What will be open?
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_00: What will get me?
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: What can I do?
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: And I was able to get it in and out.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: No problem.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_00: Ended up not even having to pay anything because that was under warranty.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_00: And It was beautiful, but I would have been a wreck.
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_00: Any little thing I would have not been able to handle.
• 16:13
  SPEAKER_00: And now it's like huge things can happen.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_00: A tote fell of all my pastries.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_00: And I was able to look at it and go, well, this is a new thing we're going to learn from.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: This can happen when you're a baker at market.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_00: You can drop your tote and lose half your supply and go, well.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_00: Next time, don't put it there.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: Put it in a different spot so when you open the door, it doesn't go.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_00: So everything is a learning lesson
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: and that's life-changing.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_00: Just your perspective, it changes everything.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: And having a clear mind and letting go
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: of that poison was It helps.
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_01: You say it so well because I had
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_01: a similar experience the other day.
• 17:18
  SPEAKER_01: I was out the other night and I Woke up the next morning and I looked at the front
• 17:25
  SPEAKER_01: of my car and whenever I like walked back to my car,
• 17:29
  SPEAKER_01: there was this big truck that was parked really close to it.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, it looks like whoever that person would have hit my car and it was dark.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_01: I couldn't see.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_01: And so, but then the next morning I could definitely see.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_01: And I mean, it's this big Broken chunk taken out
• 17:48
  SPEAKER_01: of the front plastic part of my car
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_01: and on the inside of it.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, it's pretty fucked.
• 17:56
  SPEAKER_01: But I just sat there and was like, damn.
• 18:02
  SPEAKER_01: And then, well, that happened.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_01: That happened.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm not really thinking about it.
• 18:13
  SPEAKER_01: I notice it and I'm like, yeah.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_01: It's there, that happened.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_01: That would have wrecked me years ago, completely.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: And I would have been shit-faced over thinking, why did this person do this?
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_01: I don't even know who did it.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_01: And it's like, it happened.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_01: It's done.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_01: And there's so much freedom in that, of being able to let that go.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah.
• 18:45
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for sharing.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Let's talk about creativity.
• 18:53
  SPEAKER_01: You're very creative with these bunk cakes that you make.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_01: Tell us all about how you started the bakery and all that.
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_01: Walk us through that.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_00: Like you said in the intro, I started the bakery because I was baking for bake sales
• 19:12
  SPEAKER_00: for sanctuaries.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_00: They offered, I had,
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_00: my first offer was Wildlings and that place is my second home.
• 19:23
  SPEAKER_00: I love them so much. They asked me
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_00: and then afterwards they had their most successful bake sale they've ever had
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_00: and they wanted me to be their permanent baker for anything and I was like,
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_00: Me, me.
• 19:42
  SPEAKER_00: And then I proceeded to do others.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, oh, I can do this.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I can make money doing this and then donate more money to sanctuaries.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so I started.
• 19:58
  SPEAKER_00: I got my business name last November.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I started doing markets in May.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_00: And then I started selling out.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_00: I've sold out at,
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_00: I did five of my vegan flipside markets and I sold out at three of them.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: And I've sold out the last,
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know how many weekends it's been.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_00: So yeah, that's been weird.
• 20:33
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_01: Whoever's got the flame emoji, thank you for that.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_01: That's amazing.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_00: That was really good.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_01: That doesn't happen, Noelle.
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_01: People don't start a business and start selling out like that.
• 20:54
  SPEAKER_01: So that's something to be really, really proud of.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_01: It's amazing.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_00: It's weird when I have a couple businesses that have been around for a couple years.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: Have came to me asking me for help recently
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_00: and I'm like, me?
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_00: You want me?
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_00: Like, what?
• 21:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, that I know what I'm doing and like people keep saying like I'm good
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_00: at my social media and I'm like, I have no idea what I'm doing.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_00: I wasn't even on social media before this.
• 21:33
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, Substack, that was my social media.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, And I know what I'm doing.
• 21:39
  SPEAKER_00: Like, it's so surreal.
• 21:41
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm just, I'm trying
• 21:45
  SPEAKER_00: to absorb that it's me and hear people's compliments
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_00: and people's praise because I've never been able to hear that before.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm trying to take it in.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'm trying to absorb it.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_00: And just, I'm so grateful.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's so incredible.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't know.
• 22:11
  SPEAKER_00: I have no words for it.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_00: I
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: love that.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_01: Well, so what you're selling out, these are bug cakes?
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_01: Is that right?
• 22:24
  SPEAKER_00: They're skull cakes.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_00: So I stopped doing bug cakes a while ago. I forget when I...
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_00: I think it was...
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_00: I don't remember.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: It all is a blur now.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_00: But one of my markets was Halloween themed.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_00: So I was like, oh, get more skull molds. And then I did them.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_00: And then I pleaded with my followers and I was like, please let me keep doing this.
• 22:55
  SPEAKER_00: Please don't make me change.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I'm having way too much fun doing the skulls.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I'll do other things if you want me to.
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_00: But
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_00: Please let me do this, Golds.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_00: And everybody has loved it.
• 23:13
  SPEAKER_00: And I love watching the old people come by and they'll walk
• 23:20
  SPEAKER_00: by and they'll grab their pearls and be like...
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_00: And then they always were like, that is very creative.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, yes!
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_00: Yes!
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_00: But I love the, whoa, because they're not like, they're so surprised.
• 23:37
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just my favorite.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_00: And the guy's like, ah, thank you, Sarah.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_00: But they're definitely, I found my people that way.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_00: I found my tribe of weirdos.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_00: And of course, it's Portland.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_00: Portland's motto is keep it weird.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_00: So, you know, I'm just, Doin' what Portland's supposed to do.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_00: Keep it weird.
• 24:05
  SPEAKER_01: Keep it you, keep it true, keep it weird.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_01: So these, what are some of the flavors of the skulls?
• 24:17
  SPEAKER_00: I do so many.
• 24:18
  SPEAKER_00: And then I ask my followers,
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_00: my people, my customers, what flavors they want to see.
• 24:27
  SPEAKER_00: Because I can't think of flavors that well.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_00: And they give me some bomb combinations that I'm super impressed with.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_00: I've tried a horchata where I made my own rice syrup.
• 24:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I made a blackberry lime, which I never would have put those flavors together.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_00: That was really good.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_00: I made a blueberry lavender cheesecake.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_00: And that I...
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_00: I have one amazing customer, comes all the way from Beaverton, doesn't have a car,
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_00: takes the max to wherever I'm at to get it.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, I adore you.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_00: You're amazing.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you so much.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_00: And they don't even like cheesecake.
• 25:25
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, I didn't want to try the cheesecake, but they're like, it just looked really good.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_00: And I just, I did.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_00: And that's their favorite flavor.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_00: And I do red velvet, of course.
• 25:38
  SPEAKER_00: Death by chocolate, cookie butter with Biscoff cookie butter, which is a big fave.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_00: Right now I'm doing an apple pie.
• 25:49
  SPEAKER_00: So a pie crust in a skull with apple pie filling in the middle.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_00: And my pie filling is so good.
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_00: It's so good.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I go to all my...
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_00: Fruits and stuff I get from a local farmer's market down the street from me.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_00: So it's all very locally fresh and delicious stuff.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_01: I love about the vibe in Portland with the food scene and such.
• 26:18
  SPEAKER_01: That's a good thing.
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_01: Do you feel like your creativity has...
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_01: Been more expansive with your sobriety?
• 26:32
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't have creativity before.
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_00: I was not a creative person.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_00: I hated crafts and stuff.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_00: And when I stopped drinking, I started crafting.
• 26:47
  SPEAKER_00: I was a preschool teacher.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_00: And I started crafting and then was like,
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_00: and now it's like, I cricket.
• 26:57
  SPEAKER_00: I make my own stickers.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_00: I make my own clothes.
• 27:01
  SPEAKER_00: I don't have any of my attire on because I thought it would be too weird
• 27:03
  SPEAKER_00: to wear my own gear and talk about me.
• 27:06
  SPEAKER_00: That would be too much.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_00: But I wear, I make, you see all my stuff.
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_00: But I like,
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: I create so much more and I have some, I started writing.
• 27:20
  SPEAKER_00: I started a business.
• 27:23
  SPEAKER_00: I
• 27:25
  SPEAKER_00: Have found a whole new side of me
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_00: that I never knew I had because it was replaced
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_00: by just a drink.
• 27:36
  SPEAKER_00: And now I have time or the energy
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_00: because hangovers are not the same.
• 27:46
  SPEAKER_00: And you're when you're older, like they hit you harder.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: So
• 27:52
  SPEAKER_00: I have so much more energy to create, and I've done so much,
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_00: and I never was creative before.
• 28:00
  SPEAKER_00: I still get weirded out when people say I'm creative, because I'm like, no, I'm not.
• 28:05
  SPEAKER_00: And it's like, no, I create a lot.
• 28:11
  SPEAKER_00: It's kind of what I do.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_00: I only create.
• 28:17
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, it definitely opened up.
• 28:19
  SPEAKER_01: I bet you find yourself in the flow state when you're baking, don't you?
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah. I'm jamming out to music.
• 28:28
  SPEAKER_00: I'm dancing around my kitchen.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_00: It's definitely when I'm happiest.
• 28:34
  SPEAKER_00: Even when it's 2 o'clock in the morning and I have to wake up at 5
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_00: to start getting ready for a market.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_00: I want everybody that gets anything from me to feel my love and passion.
• 28:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't want them to get anything else because my whole thing is baked with magic.
• 28:56
  SPEAKER_00: I want it to be baked with my pure love, my pure...
• 29:02
  SPEAKER_00: I want people to taste why I'm doing this because I love what I'm doing
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_00: and I love feeding people.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_00: And I want that in everything.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_00: So I want to make sure I'm in the right mindset and not...
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_00: Give people any negative energy.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_00: I want to just make people just taste love.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's it.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_00: No hate, no hurt.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_00: There's no hurt things in my baking.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_00: It's only love.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_01: We've got a FedEx, Aaron, a skull cake.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sorry. Yeah.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_01: I can't wait for that day.
• 29:50
  SPEAKER_01: Go online and get a skull overnighted.
• 29:59
  SPEAKER_00: I'll work on it.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: I have a lot of East Coast people that I just want to feed my collective
• 30:06
  SPEAKER_00: and now I need to figure out a way to ship to Canada.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_00: I need to feed my collective all over the world since we're not together.
• 30:16
  SPEAKER_01: It will happen. It will happen.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_01: What was I going to say?
• 30:22
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, like another thing that your business is rooted in kindness.
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_01: So I don't know if you feel like, you know, you just emulate that.
• 30:31
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm sure that that's without a doubt,
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_01: you know, part of why you're selling out,
• 30:38
  SPEAKER_01: you know, is you're such a bright light that you Give to people and they feel that,
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_01: so they feel that.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, it's really cool.
• 30:51
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
• 30:53
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'm so glad
• 30:55
  SPEAKER_01: that I think
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_01: whenever we're drinking,
• 31:03
  SPEAKER_01: whatever state that we're in is just increasing that state later on.
• 31:09
  SPEAKER_01: And so your anxiety And feeling that,
• 31:13
  SPEAKER_01: it's like you were perpetuating that for so many years.
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_01: And probably the self-doubt that you had about yourself, it's like, okay,
• 31:24
  SPEAKER_01: this drink is gonna take that away, but it's not really taking it away,
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_01: it's just keeping it there for the next day.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah, it's so brave when...
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_01: We decide to, yeah, it's really just a journey of finding ourselves.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_01: We have such a beautiful story around it.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_01: Um...
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_01: Let's see, Erin says start with Michigan.
• 32:00
  SPEAKER_01: All right, so Michigan's on the list.
• 32:04
  SPEAKER_01: Then you could do North Carolina.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_01: What do you have coming up?
• 32:10
  SPEAKER_01: Do you have sales this weekend?
• 32:13
  SPEAKER_00: I have deliveries today.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: I have pre-orders today.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_00: So I get to go to Portland and be a little treat fairy, my favorite thing.
• 32:22
  SPEAKER_00: And I made some extra so I can hand out because I have to.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_00: I can't not feed people.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_00: I have a problem.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so, and then this weekend I may have the weekend off.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: I may, um, I was,
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_00: Nick was showing me videos of how just a trail of all the colors
• 32:47
  SPEAKER_00: and because it's gorgeous, it's so colorful outside right now.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_00: So, um, a hike might be calling my name.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_00: Um,
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_00: But if I do, I'll probably do another pre-order.
• 33:01
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, I'm kind of taking it easy this month because I have mice.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_00: Storefront takeover happening the last Tuesday and Wednesday,
• 33:13
  SPEAKER_00: the last two weeks of November and December on Tuesday and Wednesday.
• 33:18
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm kind of saving my energy
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_00: for that because I have no idea what to expect on that.
• 33:28
  SPEAKER_00: That's stressful.
• 33:29
  SPEAKER_00: And then I have some...
• 33:33
  SPEAKER_00: I have a Wildlings function coming up.
• 33:36
  SPEAKER_00: It's a fundraiser for them.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_00: So it's a market to fundraise for them.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm excited to do that one.
• 33:45
  SPEAKER_00: I kind of begged to be in it.
• 33:47
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, we have treat vendors.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I was like, but it's my sanctuary.
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_00: I have to.
• 33:54
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, I'll be there, but just please let me give money to them.
• 33:58
  SPEAKER_00: So I tucked myself.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 34:05
  SPEAKER_01: That's so good.
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_01: The storefront, that's the week after Thanksgiving that you start?
• 34:12
  SPEAKER_00: It'll be the week before and the week of.
• 34:15
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 34:16
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 34:17
  SPEAKER_00: It'll be fun.
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_01: It's exciting.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, you got this.
• 34:24
  SPEAKER_01: You got this.
• 34:27
  SPEAKER_01: Well, yes. So anyone, if you have any questions, please drop them in the chat.
• 34:32
  SPEAKER_01: And then, Noelle, if you can let everybody know where to find you on Instagram and all that.
• 34:41
  SPEAKER_00: My Instagram is foxgloveandflower__bakery.
• 34:48
  SPEAKER_00: That's where I post all my lovely stuff.
• 34:51
  SPEAKER_00: I'm trying to get better at taking pictures. Yeah.
• 34:55
  SPEAKER_00: Because that's something I forget to do a lot.
• 34:58
  SPEAKER_00: But I'm trying to get better.
• 35:02
  SPEAKER_00: And then I have a Substack, Noelle Richards.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_00: My bakery has taken a lot of time.
• 35:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I haven't wrote as much as I would like to.
• 35:13
  SPEAKER_00: So I will.
• 35:18
  SPEAKER_00: Right. But mostly Instagram.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_00: My foxglove and flour.
• 35:24
  SPEAKER_00: That's the word.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_00: All my intentions.
• 35:29
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for that.
• 35:32
  SPEAKER_01: We do have a question. Let me pop in here.
• 35:34
  SPEAKER_01: So Mike says, hey, you guys talked about frustration.
• 35:38
  SPEAKER_01: I had a situation last week that pushed me to the edge of frustration and even anger.
• 35:43
  SPEAKER_01: Luckily, I had a long walk and then a good talk with my group therapist.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_01: What do you guys do in the moment to help with that instant reaction?
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_00: Great question.
• 35:57
  SPEAKER_00: That is a great question.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, um.
• 36:04
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I have a temper.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_00: I definitely do.
• 36:10
  SPEAKER_00: It's something that I try to keep in touch.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_00: Breathing. Because so many times when you're angry,
• 36:17
  SPEAKER_00: you just and you just hold it or you grip down or you're just just breathe
• 36:24
  SPEAKER_00: through it. Feel them.
• 36:26
  SPEAKER_00: Don't ever push anything like feel through it.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_00: Don't react.
• 36:31
  SPEAKER_00: You're allowed to feel you can be angry to reaction.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_00: So just breathe and be patient with yourself and give yourself grace because we're humans.
• 36:43
  SPEAKER_00: We can't not be humans.
• 36:44
  SPEAKER_00: And, you know, I'm so glad you have a group therapist to talk to and people to talk to.
• 36:51
  SPEAKER_00: Talk.
• 36:53
  SPEAKER_00: Breathing, it does work.
• 36:54
  SPEAKER_00: It sounds so silly and it sounds so crazy, but we don't breathe.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_00: Anytime we're stressed, we hold it in.
• 37:03
  SPEAKER_00: So, breathe. Aaron, there you go. Breathing works. See? Aaron knows.
• 37:07
  SPEAKER_00: Aaron's the shit. He knows.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_01: I don't have much to add to that, Noelle.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_01: I will say that I think a big part of sobriety is
• 37:23
  SPEAKER_01: the foundation that you build around yourself.
• 37:29
  SPEAKER_01: And it's getting quality rest, it's meditating,
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_01: it's breathing, it's food, it's walking.
• 37:38
  SPEAKER_01: All of these things...
• 37:43
  SPEAKER_01: Work together to set you up for when these moments happen that you don't have
• 37:49
  SPEAKER_01: to react so quickly.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_01: I notice it for myself.
• 37:55
  SPEAKER_01: If I don't get quality sleep or enough sleep,
• 38:02
  SPEAKER_01: my reaction time is way quicker
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_01: of getting upset or feeling anxious.
• 38:13
  SPEAKER_01: That plays a big, big part into it too.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_01: So, yeah.
• 38:18
  SPEAKER_00: For sure. For sure.
• 38:20
  SPEAKER_00: Good point.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_01: We're human. We're human.
• 38:23
  SPEAKER_01: It's going to happen.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and it's like, yeah,
• 38:27
  SPEAKER_01: being self-compassionate towards ourselves when that happens.
• 38:33
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's quick to be like,
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_01: oh, we did something wrong and we can sit in that.
• 38:42
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, this has been so good.
• 38:43
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for hanging out with us, everyone.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks, Noel.
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_01: You said, just feel it and let it move through.
• 38:55
  SPEAKER_01: Breathe and move on to the next moment.
• 39:01
  SPEAKER_01: Oh this has been so good!
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for hanging out with us everyone. Thanks Noelle. You rock.
• 39:09
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, Josh.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_00: You rock.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, everyone, so much.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_00: I appreciate y'all.
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_00: I appreciate all the butterflies.
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_00: That's so cool, the flames and butterflies.
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_01: I know.
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_01: You could change the emojis.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_01: Our pleasure, Mike.
• 39:28
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for being with us.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to press the hearts.
• 39:33
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks, love, conquers, hate.
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, love, conquers, hate.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_01: I think we did that a little bit yesterday, I think.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_01: Let me see.
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_01: I think we had some good news today.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_01: Much love, everyone.
• 39:48
  SPEAKER_01: Have a wonderful weekend.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_01: And yes, we'll see you next week. Take care.
• 39:55
  SPEAKER_00: Bye, guys. Thank you.