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What are the benefits of going NO CONTACT with a narcissist? · The Mental Healness Podcast

• 0:00
  So what are the benefits of going no contact with a
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  narcissist or a toxic person? If you're new here, My name is
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  Lee Hammock. I'm a clinically diagnosed
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  narcissist and welcome to another episode of the
• 0:10
  Narcissist Code. So welcome back, Welcome back,
• 0:30
  Welcome back, Welcome back. What is going on?
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  Beautiful folks. Happy Wednesday, March 13th.
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  What is up? What is up?
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  What is up? So what are the benefits of
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  going no contact? I know people always talk about,
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  you know, going no contact with a narcissist.
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  And how does the, you know, just this the only way out of a
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  relationship. That's the only thing you can
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  do. I get it, you know?
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  But very rarely do you hear people talk about the actual
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  reasons why you need to go. No contact.
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  They actually they actually the actual benefits of doing so
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  because there are benefits of doing so.
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  It's kind of like, you know, there's benefits of taking
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  medicine when you get sick, there's benefits of eating
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  apples and oranges, you know, eating healthy, there's benefits
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  to it and whatnot. So there is benefits to going no
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  contact with your narcissistic partner or parent or friend.
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  Whatever role they play in your life, there's a benefit of going
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  no contact with that person. And one of the main benefits is
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  it helps you heal it it it absolutely is the fact like, I
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  feel like the you know, the fastest, the fastest, you know
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  the the shortest point between the shortest point the shortest
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  distance but two between 2 lines, This narcissistic robot
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  needs to reset talking too fast, reset it, reboot it.
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  So the shortest distance between two different points is a
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  straight line, right? No contact is that straight line
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  going no contact is absolutely that straight line that a lot of
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  people face. I mean, a lot of people like,
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  don't understand. It's hard to heal when you're
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  still talking to the person every single day.
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  It is, it just, it is, it just is.
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  Especially if you have no other reason to talk to the person
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  other than you just love the person.
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  Like if you don't have kids, if you don't have any business
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  business dealings, if you don't have any property, if you don't
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  have any leases, if you don't have any, like whatever it is,
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  if you don't have any other connection other than this
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  relationship, it's a lot hard. It, you know, it's a lot easier
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  to go no contact. It just makes sense.
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  It's a lot easier to cut the tie to go no contact because no
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  contact can help you heal. It's hard to get over a person
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  if you're talking to that St. if you're talking to that person
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  every single day about your feelings about the person, how
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  the relationship went wrong or how maybe how you can get back
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  together later on or trying to be friends and what not through
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  it. No, it is hard as hell to do
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  that right there. Y'all.
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  It is absolutely hard as hell to just get over somebody that
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  you're still in love with, that you talk to every single day,
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  every day. You know, it is very difficult.
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  It's a very hard thing to do when you're when you're trying
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  to do that right there. So no contact can help you heal
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  faster. No, it is.
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  It's tough. It's tough.
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  It's tough. I know the anxiety builds up.
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  What if they what if they reach out to me?
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  What if they've changed? You have to be ready to go.
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  No contact. You have to be understand like
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  this is it right here. You know I have other videos to
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  go more in depth into the process of going no contact.
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  But you have to be ready to go no contact.
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  You have to understand that this probably will be the last time
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  you talked to the person, the last time you that maybe not the
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  last time you hear from them, but the last time that you
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  initiate any type of contact. So you have to be ready to do
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  that. So in order to no contact, you
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  got to be ready to block them everywhere.
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  Universal blocking, universal block.
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  Just like a universal remote, universal block.
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  You got to universally block them everywhere.
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  Social media, your phone, your e-mail, mutual friends that you
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  don't really, you don't really talk to mutual acquaintances.
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  You see what I'm saying? You have to be able to do that
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  because it helps you heal. Not talking to the same person
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  every single day, you know, It just does.
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  There's other things that you can do.
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  Write in your journal, go for a walk, do go, go to the gym,
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  whatever it is, you know, eat some ice cream.
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  What? That don't don't look crazy or
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  eat the ice cream. But like, you know, if you feel
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  like you need to eat a little bit, but not too much, just in
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  that space right there. But you don't want to eat your
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  feelings because they can take, take you to a whole different
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  place. You know, you want to make sure
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  you're eating, but you don't want to eat your feelings
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  because they can take you to a whole different place of
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  depression and whatnot. But yeah, you have to.
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  It helps you heal faster. Y'all.
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  It just does, You know what I mean?
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  It helps you heal faster than talking to the same talking to
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  the person every single day. You know another benefit of
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  going no contact is the fact it it it just shows you how strong
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  you are. And a lot of people don't talk
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  about that right there, do you? You know, I was going with it.
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  Did you? You know, I was going.
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  It shows you resolve it. Show it's proof.
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  It's proof that you can do it. You know, it's absolute proof
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  that you can go. No kind.
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  It's proof that you don't need this person.
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  It just, it's evidence that you don't need this person in your
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  life. Did you survive your life before
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  this person? Let's say it was your parent.
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  It's different if it's your parent.
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  Of course you survived. You survived before you got into
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  this relationship. You've been in other
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  relationships that you survived and got out of.
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  You can get out of this one as well.
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  You can make it out of this relationship as well.
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  You can get out of this relationship.
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  You can be you. There's proof that you don't
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  need this person. There's proof you already have
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  proof that that there is survival after this
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  relationship. It's evidence of how strong you
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  are. It's evidence of how much
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  resolve you have for yourself. It's evidence of how much you
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  love yourself. It's evidence you know.
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  It's evidence. It just is.
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  It shows you it's proof that you can how strong you are.
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  I don't think people understand how difficult it is to sever an
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  emotional tie. The physical tie is hard to, but
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  severing that emotional and physical tie woo, it is
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  difficult. It is difficult and I'm not.
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  I'm not trying to make it seem like it's easy.
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  That's what I'm just saying. I'm outright saying that it is
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  difficult, you know, So you have to be able to have this is
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  showing you how strong you are that you have this resolve right
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  here. It really is.
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  It's showing you that you right there.
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  Well, my, my, my shirt says it. It's showing you how resilient
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  you are, you know. That's the self love brand.
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  I love me. It's showing you just how
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  resilient you are. It's showing you proof, right?
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  There's evidence. You know it is.
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  You know what I mean? Another benefit is you get you
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  the freedom that comes with it. Y'all.
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  Yes, it's tough. It takes a while to get to this
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  feeling of freedom, but you get there.
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  This feeling of freedom is you can do what you want to do
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  pretty much. It's like you get released from
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  prison, right? No contact means you get to live
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  life on your terms and not worry about where this person is at.
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  Not worry about reaching out to this person or letting this
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  person know where you are at. You know you don't have to let
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  this person know where you are. You don't have to let this
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  person know where you are right now.
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  You can do what you want to do. It's the ability going.
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  No contact gives you the ability to live life on your terms and
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  not worry about somebody else. Not worry about make sure you
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  not worry about walking on egg shells or living within somebody
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  else's boundaries or living within somebody else's walls and
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  what not. You don't have to worry about
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  that. When you successfully go no
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  contact, you know there's a whole different process but you
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  get there y'all be strong as hell.
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  You just don't be realizing it. But that no contact feeling of
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  freedom, it's different. It's a different feeling when
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  you go no contact and you get out.
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  Like I said, when you when the pain subsides and the anxiety
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  goes down a little bit, when you realize that you can go do what
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  you want to do, that you're no longer bound to someone else
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  like that when you it sets you free.
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  You have that feeling of freedom right there.
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  You're like, damn, I can do what I want to do today, you know?
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  You don't have to go to sleep at night wondering what type of
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  person. Wondering if they're coming home
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  this wondering, wondering what time they're going to be there.
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  You know, wondering where they are at 3:00 AM when their phone
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  is off. You don't have to worry about
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  that anymore. You know, it gives you the
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  ability to live life on your terms and not have to worry
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  about that. Just be worried about even if
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  they do come home that night, what type of person is coming
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  home? They'll be drunk or they have
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  been drinking or they haven't been cheating or they'll be
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  angry as hell or they'll be give you the silent treatment.
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  You know, can you even ask a question about where, where they
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  are, where they've been? There's so many different
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  possibilities that exist right here within this space, you
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  know, there's so many different possibilities.
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  It really is. So that's why I tell people
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  there's a very interesting dynamic that go that that goes
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  on into play here where so many people, you know, when you're
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  moving forward with your strength, you get to feel that
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  freedom. You're free, no contact.
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  It's freedom, you know, it's the ability to live life on your
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  terms. Like you get to, you know, you
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  get to do this type of stuff without somebody else telling
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  you what to do. The rules have changed.
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  You know, it's like I said, it's like getting your damn near
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  getting the key to your jail cell.
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  They're like, hey, you got paroles?
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  Yeah, yeah, just like being paroled.
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  Hey, somebody posted your bond. You're out.
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  You're out. Hey, hey, Hemet.
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  Somebody posted your bond. You're out of here.
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  Like, oh, I'm free. Yeah, you're free.
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  You win. No contact.
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  You know what I mean? But no contact.
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  I think this is the last thing I say about the last benefit.
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  Y'all. It allows other people to come
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  back into your life as well. When you go No contact, are you
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  healing from a narcissistic person?
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  It allows relationships that might have been struggling, like
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  your friends and your own family members, to other family
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  members. If it's your parent or your
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  other, you know your friends and people like that.
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  You get to recultivate those relationships.
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  You know you get to rebuild some relationships that might have
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  struggled while you were in that toxic relationship dynamic.
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  You might be get to go pursue the job that you wanted to
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  pursue. You get to you get to pursue the
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  life that you wanted to pursue. Go back to school.
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  Get the degree. Focus on me.
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  You know you get There's so many different things you get to do
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  in this space because you decided to go no contact and
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  remain strong and unwaver. You know, have the unwavering
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  strength and whatnot. That's the that's the power of
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  no contact right there. Y'all you get to them near do
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  what you want to do. You get to read your you get to
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  talk to your parents. You get to, you know, you don't
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  have to worry about holidays being ruined.
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  You know that. You don't have all the holidays
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  being ruined, your birthday being ruined.
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  You know, I know it's different. It's always going to be
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  different. Y'all, always get.
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  If you have kids but still going low, low contact can still allow
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  you the ability to experience a lot of these things as well.
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  Only talking about the kids, you know only talking about the kids
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  only talking about parenting and Co parenting, a parallel
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  parenting or whatever you're doing right there.
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  You know the kids still gives you some of those similar
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  benefits, but not, you know, no going, no content.
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  It's always, you know, low contact, no contact, whatever
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  you can go. There's so many different
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  benefits to it. Like I said, no more.
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  You know, you get world, but you get to travel the world.
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  You want to travel. You get to do what you want to
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  do, but on your own terms. No more.
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  No more bad birthdays. No more getting a shoe.
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  No more getting a shoe rack for Christmas.
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  No more you know, or broom set or hair cutting clip kit, kit,
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  whatever you you know, whatever you didn't want.
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  No more. Get no more.
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  Not getting those things that you didn't want anyways.
• 11:27
  Y'all, I appreciate you being here.
• 11:29
  Make sure you like to subscribe to the channel.
• 11:31
  If you have it, make sure you check out my mini course.
• 11:33
  It's getting good reviews so far.
• 11:34
  I'm so thankful for everybody who's taking my mini course,
• 11:37
  understanding the seven stages of a toxic relationship.
• 11:40
  Links in the description of every video and podcast I do.
• 11:42
  Apple Music people, Spotify, people hit that five stars for
• 11:46
  me. Y'all please, please play.
• 11:47
  I said look, I appreciate everybody who's left me a good
• 11:49
  review on on the podcast on Apple.
• 11:51
  But there's been some people who leave who decide they go leave
• 11:53
  bad reviews. Y'all like people don't listen
• 11:55
  to my profile, don't listen to the podcast.
• 11:58
  Go give it a one star review. Oh it's it's a narcissist.
• 12:01
  That's why I'm doing this right here.
• 12:04
  Lee. Look, somebody did the last one
• 12:05
  of the last reviews. All had no cattle.
• 12:08
  Lee talks a lot but says nothing.
• 12:09
  What Produced by Narc. Need we say more?
• 12:14
  Nope. Move on.
• 12:15
  Those are the last two reviews. Those are one star reviews with
• 12:17
  people who don't really understand the platform.
• 12:19
  But the last five star review. I appreciate your Portland
• 12:22
  podcast, said. I stumbled upon Lee's leading
• 12:25
  clarity in my past relationship. He is authentic, real hilarious
• 12:28
  and gives me the most genuine understanding of what I've been
• 12:29
  going through. Appreciate y'all Who left the
• 12:31
  good reviews. These are those one stars.
• 12:33
  I'm like, come on now. Y'all ready.
• 12:34
  Let's. I appreciate y'all.
• 12:37
  Anyway, y'all like to subscribe. Me too.
• 12:39
  This is out. Please thank you so much for
• 12:42
  making it to the end of my video.
• 12:43
  You are a mental illness Rockstar and I appreciate you
• 12:45
  for being here. If you haven't already, make
• 12:47
  sure to click on the screen to subscribe to the channel and
• 12:50
  watch another one of my videos on my playlist.
• 12:52
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• 12:55
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• 12:57
  fault on Amazon so check that out.
• 12:59
  Thank you. I will see you in the next
• 13:01
  video. Peace.