Latest / Reformed Thinking / Ask, Seek, Knock: Bold Prayer, Fatherly Goodness, and the Obedience Love Requires (Matthew 7:7–12)

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Ask, Seek, Knock: Bold Prayer, Fatherly Goodness, and the Obedience Love Requires (Matthew 7:7–12) · Reformed Thinking

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  Welcome back to Reformed Thinking.
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  We're doing another deep dive, and today we're looking at the
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  source materials you sent us, focusing on a really key passage
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  in the Gospel of Matthew. Chapter 7, verses 7 through 12
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  that's. The one the famous ask, seek
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  knock instruction. It is, but as the sources point
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  out, its placement is just so critical we can't just lift it
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  out and make it a stand alone quote.
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  Right. And that's our mission today,
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  really, to get to the theological bedrock of what's
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  going on here and also the practical ethical demands that
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  come out of it. Yeah, how Christ frames prayer
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  is it's not about performance. It's not about trying to
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  manipulate God. He presents it as just
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  persistent dependence. Exactly.
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  And to get that, you have to see where it sits in the Sermon on
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  the Mount. OK, so let's set that stage.
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  You've got Matthew Chapter 7. We've just come out of these
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  really heavy warnings about hypocrisy, about judgmentalism.
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  Verses one through 6, Yeah. And then right after our
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  section, you get the tests of discipleship.
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  The narrow gate, the good and bad fruit, the wise and foolish
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  builders, all that. All of that.
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  So you have to ask the question, why this?
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  Why here? Why does the command to pray
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  land right in this spot, sandwiched between our failures
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  and the demands for our obedience?
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  Because the ethical standard of the Sermon on the Mount, I mean
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  purity of heart, loving your enemies, not being anxious,
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  it's, it's impossible. On our own you mean?
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  On our own, it completely exposes our human insufficiency.
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  You can't achieve this righteousness by just trying
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  harder. So if you're going to be
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  commanded to live this way, you first have to be given the means
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  to do it. You have to draw strength from
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  somewhere else. That's the logic.
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  The righteousness that's required isn't built on self
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  reformation. It's not about moral grit.
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  It has to be sustained by a constant, almost childlike
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  trust. Without that dependence, the
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  obedience just isn't possible. It's not.
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  You'd either just collapse in despair because you're failing
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  all the time, or you'd puff yourself up with hypocrisy
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  pretending you're not. So Jesus kind of pauses the
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  demands and says, OK, before we go any further, you have to
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  learn the one habit that undergirds everything else.
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  Continual dependence on the Father.
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  And the source material we have, it identifies 22 specific
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  spiritual errors that Jesus is confronting with this teaching.
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  Yes. The first one is cynicism.
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  OK, this is what happens when prayer requests seem to go
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  unanswered or the silence just goes on too long.
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  You start to quietly retreat into self-reliance.
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  You start thinking, well, what's the point?
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  God must be distant. Right, Or he's indifferent and
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  you just replace communion with God with well, self management.
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  You just handle it yourself. And the second error.
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  Superstition, and this one might be even more dangerous.
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  How so? This is where you treat prayer
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  like a a human technique, a kind of leverage.
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  Like an incantation. An incantation, yeah.
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  As if using the right words or having enough intensity, or just
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  repeating it over and over could somehow obligate A sovereign God
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  to give you what you want. And Jesus cuts through both of
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  those. He does.
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  He shifts the whole focus. He grounds our confidence, not
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  in our method or our piety, but in the reliable character of the
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  Father. It moves from what we do to who
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  God is. That's it.
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  OK, so let's unpack that core instruction in verse 7.
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  Ask, Seek, knock. Yeah, and at first glance, you
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  might think these are three different levels.
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  You know, like asking is for beginners, seeking is
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  intermediate, and knocking is for the spiritual elite.
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  Kind of ladder of spiritual power.
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  Right, but the sources are clear that the Greek here, the
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  grammar, it implies ongoing action.
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  Continue asking. Continue seeking.
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  Continue knocking. So it's not a sequence, it's the
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  same duty dependence, just expressed in three different
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  ways. Exactly right.
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  The big idea is persistent dependence on God.
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  It's the opposite of, you know, the sporadic religious
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  performances that were common then and are still common now.
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  It's a posture of life. We're not self-sufficient beings
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  who just check in with God every now and then.
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  We are needy children. We have to live with open hands.
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  Let's break down these verbs, then.
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  Each one seems to get at a different aspect of our
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  spiritual posture. Let's start with asking.
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  Asking is just It's the plain admission of need.
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  It's where you abandoned pride. It's the confession that you
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  just don't have the strength or the wisdom or the resources to
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  manage life on your own. It's applying that poverty of
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  spirit idea from the Beatitudes. It is.
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  It's saying, Lord, I lack you have to be the one to supply.
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  Without that starting point, that confession of need prayer
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  just becomes this this mechanical, self-serving thing.
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  But we can ask for the wrong things, things that are harmful
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  or just not aligned with His Kingdom, which is maybe where
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  seeking comes in. That's right, seeking shifts the
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  focus from the thing you're requesting to the person you're
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  requesting it from. So you're pursuing God himself,
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  His will, His Kingdom. His righteousness, it reinforces
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  what Jesus said just a chapter before.
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  Seek first the Kingdom of God. A true life of prayer refines
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  what your heart desires. So.
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  It's not just God give me what I want.
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  No, it becomes God conformed my desires to yours.
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  Help me find the path you want for me.
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  It keeps our request governed by his priorities.
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  And then we have this very physical active image knocking.
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  Knocking is about perseverance. But, and this is key, it's
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  perseverance with expectation. OK, think about it.
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  You don't just stand there and knock on a door you think is
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  locked forever or abandoned. You don't knock on an enemy's
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  door. You knock where you expect to be
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  welcomed. You knock where you assume
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  there's a relationship where you have access.
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  So when Christ commands us to knock, he's telling us to
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  approach a God, not as some reluctant judge you have to wear
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  down, but as a Father who invites his children to come
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  again and again, even when it feels like he's silent.
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  The persistence comes from confidence, not desperation.
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  You mentioned before how these three verbs sort of correct
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  those two spiritual diseases. Let's go back to that first
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  cynicism, which leads to prayerlessness.
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  I think a lot of us can fall into that, a kind of functional
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  deism. We live our lives anxiously
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  managing things, acting as if God is a long way off.
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  And functional deism is really just a quiet confession of
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  unbelief. It's saying, yeah, God might
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  exist, but he doesn't really get involved.
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  So I have to fix this. And the commands here are a
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  direct rebuke to that. They are ask, Jesus says.
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  Because you have a Father who listens.
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  Seek. Because he isn't hiding from
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  you. Knock because the door to his
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  house to his provision. It isn't barred against you.
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  He doesn't wait for us to feel faithful, He commands us to act
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  based on the reality of who the Father is.
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  Exactly. And on the other side, that idea
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  of prayer is control, superstition.
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  How do we tell the difference between genuine perseverance and
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  the vain repetitions Jesus warned about in chapter 6?
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  I mean, if you're praying for the same thing for a long time,
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  how do you know if you're clinging to God or just trying
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  to manipulate Him? It's a fine line, but the
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  difference is all in the posture of the heart.
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  OK, Think of a child asking his father for food.
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  He asks again and again because he's dependent and he trusts his
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  father's character. That's perseverance.
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  But the other way. The other way is trying to use
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  repetition to get a mystical edge, or to build up enough
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  religious credit to force God's hand.
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  That's a magical technique. So perseverance is humble.
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  It knows it still needs God and trusts his wisdom.
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  And superstition is proud. It thinks its own action, its
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  own repetition, is the secret ingredient for success.
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  So if we bring that back to a reformed understanding, we see
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  prayer as a means of grace. Could you unpack that term for a
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  listener who might not be familiar with it?
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  Sure, when we say prayer is a means of grace, we mean it's one
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  of the methods God has appointed, along with things
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  like the preaching of the Word and the sacraments, to
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  strengthen our faith and give us help.
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  So it's not a work we do to earn something.
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  Not at all. It's not a way to earn favor or
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  create leverage. Prayer isn't homework you do to
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  get a good grade from God. It's more like a spiritual
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  workout that conforms your will to His, strengthens your soul,
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  and is the very channel through which He supplies help.
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  It's an invitation. It's an invitation into ongoing,
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  humble, confident communion with her father.
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  And that leads perfectly into verse 8, which is the ground for
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  all this assurance. Why should we keep asking,
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  seeking, and knocking? Well, verse 8 starts with a
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  simple word for. That little word for is doing a
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  lot of theological work there. For everyone who asks receives,
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  and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, it will
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  be opened. It connects the command in verse
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  7 directly to the reality of God's character.
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  Jesus isn't just throwing out a spiritual challenge, He's giving
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  a guarantee about who the Father is.
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  He's saying keep coming, not because you're so good at
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  asking, but because the one you're asking is reliable.
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  And he answers his children. If you didn't have that
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  assurance, the command to keep asking would just lead back to
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  despair, right? We just feel like failures
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  again. But Christ speaks as the Son who
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  knows the Father's dependable nature.
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  That for turns the command into a rational assurance.
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  But this is where we have to be careful.
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  We need to add that necessary qualification so we don't fall
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  into the the blank check error. The idea that this promise means
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  God will give you anything you ask for, like a cosmic vending
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  machine. Exactly that phrase.
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  Everyone who asks receives It can't be lifted out of the
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  context of discipleship and the Kingdom of God.
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  OK, but this is a challenge, right?
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  The text seems so plain. Everyone receives if we start
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  saying, well, sometimes the answer is no or wait, aren't we
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  risking watering down what Jesus is saying?
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  I see the challenge, but we have to read the whole of Scripture
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  consistently. Who is Jesus talking to?
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  He's talking to disciples, people who have been called to
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  holiness, to repentance, to seeking the Kingdom first.
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  Their asking is already being shaped by the Lord's Prayer, by
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  your will be done. Precisely.
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  We're not using prayer to chase our own self will.
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  We're appealing to a heart that is being trained to want what
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  the Father wants. So if we ask for something
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  that's against his will or would just be bad for us.
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  Then the promise of receiving is filtered through His perfect
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  fatherly wisdom when the Father answers with a no or a weight
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  that is still still a faithful answer.
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  It's still a response. It is.
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  He always responds, but he responds with wisdom, not just
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  according to our momentary craving To get what is good, Our
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  definition of good has to start aligning with his.
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  And that helps us understand the three parts of the promise in
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  verse 8. Let's look at receive, find, and
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  open. Again, it seems like the answer
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  goes way beyond just getting stuff.
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  It does. To receive is probably the most
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  tangible. God gives real help.
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  It might be provision or forgiveness or protection, but
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  to find that shifts the focus more inward.
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  It suggests guidance, direction, wisdom.
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  Often we ask for a thing when what we really need is clarity.
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  So prayer helps us find the right path, not just get
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  supplies for the journey. And then to have the door open,
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  that speaks of access, of opportunity.
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  God isn't locked away. He opens doors to himself.
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  He removes barriers. He provides opportunities for
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  service all as he sees fit. And none of that forces him to
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  give us the specific thing we asked for on our timetable, no.
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  The main point is that faithful prayer brings us under the
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  active, intelligent, loving care of our Father.
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  He's always responding, but always wisely.
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  So the deepest comfort here isn't in how loud we pray or how
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  strong our faith feels. No, it rests entirely in the
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  stable character of the one who hears us.
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  And that's critical. Our confidence is tied to our
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  status as adopted children. We don't come to God as a
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  merchant trying to bargain. We come as sons and daughters
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  pleading. And because he's already given
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  the greatest gift. His son Christ.
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  We can logically conclude that he's not going to withhold any
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  other truly good thing that we need for our salvation and our
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  holiness. It's the logic of the greater to
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  the lesser. It gives us a really solid
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  assurance we aren't just shouting into an empty room.
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  We're speaking to a Father who hears, who knows, who acts, and
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  who will absolutely respond in the way the best serves His
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  glory and our true good. And to make that assurance
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  totally concrete, Jesus gives these two illustrations in
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  verses 9 and 10. They seem designed to dismantle
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  that specific spiritual sickness of distrust in God's heart.
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  Distrust is our default setting, isn't it?
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  When prayer is delayed or when suffering comes, we start to
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  suspect God is cruel or just indifferent.
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  And Jesus use of this this instinctive moral labor to
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  counter that parental instinct. Exactly.
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  The first one is bread and stone.
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  Or which one of you? If his son asks him for bread,
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  we'll give him a stone. The power of the question is
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  that the answer is so obvious. No decent father answers hunger
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  with mockery. Right.
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  Bread is just necessary provision.
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  A stone is useless. It might look a little like a
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  loaf of bread. You know a round brown river
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  stone, but it's a cruel counterfeit.
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  A father who does that isn't just withholding food, he's
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  adding insult to injury. He is, and Jesus point is that
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  God does not respond to his children with counterfeits.
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  When God gives, he gives genuinely nourishing gifts.
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  Then he makes the picture even more intense.
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  He moves from uselessness to actual danger with the second
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  illustration. Fish and serpent, Or if he asked
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  for a fish, we'll give him a serpent.
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  Fish was a staple food in Galilee.
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  Yeah, a basic need. But the serpent is deadly.
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  It can bite you. This speaks right to that
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  fearful heart that says, I prayed and now things are even
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  worse. God must be working against me.
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  We interpret affliction as divine malice.
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  We do, and Jesus just completely denies that conclusion.
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  At its roots. A good Father doesn't give his
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  child something that will poison or destroy him and call it a
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  gift. He doesn't substitute harm for
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  help. No, and that has huge
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  theological significance. It means even God's sharpest
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  Providence is the suffering we go through.
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  They aren't serpents sent to kill us, They're medicine to
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  heal us. They're not venom.
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  They're disciplined to restore us.
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  Divine fatherhood by its nature excludes both mockery, the
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  stone, and cruelty, the serpent. The illustrations established
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  that it's impossible for God to use our prayers against us.
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  This really calls for a repentance of suspicion in us.
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  Yeah, we are so quick to assume God is spiteful when things go
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  wrong. But Jesus insists we have to
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  interpret God's actions through the lens of his known character
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  as a perfectly good Father. And we also have to admit that
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  we, the children, often get the items mixed up ourselves.
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  What do you mean? Well, we asked for something we
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  call bread. Maybe it's a quick, comfortable
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  fix to a deep problem. And when God says no, we think
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  he's denied us nourishment. But he knows that what we called
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  bread was actually a stone. It would have starved our soul
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  or fed our pride. The denial was actually the good
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  gift. Or we ask for a fish, something
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  that seems really good, like a new opportunity, but the Father
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  knows it's actually a serpent with hidden venom that would
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  destroy us spiritually. Right.
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  It might lead us into compromise or idolatry.
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  So the main point is the Father will never give us something
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  that's spiritually poisonous. We're not dealing with some
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  unpredictable Pagan deity. We're coming to a Father whose
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  goodness makes cruel counterfeits impossible.
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  And that leads right into the core of the argument that the
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  magnificent how much more logic in verse 11.
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  This feels like the theological anchor for all Christian
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  assurance and prayer. It is.
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  It's that reasoning from the lesser to the greater.
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  If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your
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  children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven?
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  Let's pause on that word evil. That sounds pretty harsh.
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  Christ is saying that to his listeners and to us.
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  Is that just, you know, rhetorical exaggeration?
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  I don't think so. I think this is Jesus giving a
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  realistic anthropology a true understanding of our fallen
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  state. And it's a necessary part of the
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  argument. It is.
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  It prevents us from building our assurance on the sand of our own
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  virtue. He's saying we aren't just weak
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  or uninformed, we are by nature corrupted in heart and inclined
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  away from God. So even the best human act of
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  love is still tainted somehow with self-interest or
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  impatience. Something yes, the best human
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  parents love is mixed with sin. But, and this is the key, in the
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  same breath, Jesus acknowledges common grace.
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  Even though we are evil, we still know how to give good
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  gifts. Right, that natural affection is
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  God's restraint on evil in the world.
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  Even a very sinful person understands that bread is better
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  for their child than a stone. And Christ just leverages that
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  basic shared moral sense if a human father whose love is
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  imperfect and mixed with sin still gets this basic duty
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  right. Then the conclusion about the
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  Heavenly Father is unassailable. If an imperfect father gives
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  good things, then the perfectly holy, wise, and good Father must
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  be infinitely better. God isn't just a better version
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  of us on our best day. No, He is goodness itself,
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  essential goodness. His wisdom never fails.
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  His resources are never depleted.
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  So the logic is actually stronger because it starts with
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  our sinfulness. It is.
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  If even evil fathers don't give stones, then you can be
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  absolutely certain the perfectly good father's giving will be
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  surer, purer, and wiser. It means prayer is never wasted.
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  It's never unheard. And it's never handled with
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  contempt. The father's superiority means
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  he will never answer in a way that is ultimate bad for his
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  child, even if the child can't see the good in it at the time.
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  This guards US against both despair on one side and
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  entitlement on the other. It does.
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  It rebukes the despair that reads hardship as God being
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  hostile, and it rebukes the entitlement that treats prayer
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  like a contract to get what we want.
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  We're the child under his care, not the judge over his actions.
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  And when we ask, seek and knock, we are acting on the absolute
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  fact that God is kind. We're not testing to see if He
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  is kind. We keep asking because our
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  Father is better than any earthly father.
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  We keep seeking because His wisdom is so much greater than
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  ours. That's it.
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  It settles the question of God's heart.
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  OK, so if he gives good things, that's the conclusion of verse
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  11. That brings up the critical
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  question, What are these good gifts?
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  How does the Father define good? And this is the definition we
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  have to get right, because our hearts by default define good as
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  immediate comfort or ease or just getting our plans
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  confirmed. But the Father's love means
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  giving us what truly benefits us, even if it's at the expense
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  of our immediate comfort. Right.
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  God defines good by His own holy character, His eternal saving
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  purpose for us, and what will advance His Kingdom.
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  And the context of the Sermon on the Mount is decisive.
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  Again here. The good gifts are meant to
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  produce the righteousness Jesus commands.
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  So good often looks very different from what we
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  requested. Good might look like wisdom
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  instead of an easy way out. Might look like holiness instead
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  of comfort, or endurance instead of escape.
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  A lot of the time, prayer is answered not by removing the
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  burden, but by giving us the strength to carry it faithfully.
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  That's often the highest good gift.
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  The changing of our heart within the circumstances is not just
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  changing the circumstances themselves.
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  The Father gives what will kill our sins and loosen our grip on
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  the world. And Luke's parallel passage
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  really helps clarify this, doesn't it?
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  Matthew says the Father gives good things, but Luke 11.13 says
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  He gives the Holy Spirit. They're perfectly complementary.
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  The Holy Spirit is the supreme gift.
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  It's God giving himself to us to apply the work of Christ.
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  So the best possible gift isn't a smoother life.
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  No, it's the Spirit sanctifying work in US, cultivating a love
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  for God, a hatred for sin, giving us comfort.
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  This completely guards against any kind of prosperity gospel
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  idea. The Father's generosity is about
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  conforming us to the Son, not just polishing our
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  circumstances. Exactly.
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  Which means his goodness may require him to say no or wait.
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  The refusal of a request may in itself be a good gift.
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  It might be rescuing us from an idol or a desire that would have
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  destroyed our faith. Can you give a practical modern
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  example of this? Something we might ask for is
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  bread that the Father knows is a stone.
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  Sure, someone might pray constantly for financial
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  security, a certain level of wealth they believe it will let
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  them serve God without being anxious.
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  That sounds like bread. But the Father who knows their
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  heart might refuse because he knows that security would
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  actually feed a deep seated pride.
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  It would replace trust in Him with trust in money.
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  The denial is a good gift. What about a serpent we might
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  ask for as a fish? We might ask for the fish of
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  immediate success in some ministry or career, believing it
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  will bring glory to God. Seems like a good thing to ask
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  for. It does, but the father knows
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  that quick public success carries the venom of arrogance
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  for that particular person, so he delays it.
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  He chooses to lead them through a quiet, difficult season
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  instead. That difficulty isn't a serpent,
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  it's the medicine to prepare their character for whatever
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  comes next. So we pray with boldness,
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  because the Father is generous. And with submission, because the
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  father is wise, the promise isn't you'll get whatever you
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  crave, it's you will never receive from your father
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  anything that is not in the end, good for you.
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  And that's the truth that can steady us through trials.
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  It is, it teaches us to measure goodness by the Kingdom and to
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  rest in the wisdom of a Father who delights to bless his
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  children. This brings us to the final
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  verse here, verse 12. It's the ethical hinge, and it
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  starts with that decisive connector.
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  So or therefore. So whatever you wish that others
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  would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and
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  the prophets. This isn't a change of subject.
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  Not at all. It's the ethical conclusion that
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  is drawn directly from everything he just said about
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  prayer and the Father's goodness.
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  The logic is binding. Prayer isn't a retreat from
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  obedience. It's the engine that sustains
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  Kingdom ethics. If you've been asking, seeking
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  and knocking, and you've experienced the father's
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  generosity, you must then reflect that outward in how you
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  love your neighbor. It integrates our dependence on
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  God with our practice in the world.
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  You can't love your neighbor sacrificially if you're running
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  on the fumes of your own self will.
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  You can't forgive if you're not receiving forgiveness.
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  This verse just exposes the hypocrisy of trying to separate
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  what God has joined together. And you see that separation all
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  the time, people trying to be ethical without prayer, they're
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  just running on their own temperament or guilt.
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  And that leads to either pride, I'm a good person, or complete
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  burnout. And the other side too.
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  People who pray a lot but have no ethics.
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  They're harsh, selfish, unchanged.
• 22:32
  They use prayer as a refuge from actually having to repent and
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  change. Christ demands that the 2GO
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  together. Prayer is where God purifies our
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  desires so we can love people the right way.
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  Yes. When we ask for mercy, we're
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  being trained to show mercy. The one who has received true
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  bread from the Father cannot with any integrity hand a stone
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  to his neighbor. And the sources point out how
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  prayer gets at the root sins that stop us from living out
• 22:56
  this golden rule. It does.
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  First, pride. Prayer humbles us, reminds us
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  we're always receivers before we're doers.
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  And fear. Fear and anxiety.
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  Yes, fear makes us hoard and protect what we have.
• 23:06
  The prayer re centers us on the Father who supplies everything,
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  which frees us to be generous without panicking.
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  And resentment, too. When you've experienced God's
• 23:15
  forgiveness, you're made capable of forgiving others.
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  The whole logic of the passage is unified.
• 23:20
  Because God is a generous father to you, you must be a generous
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  neighbor to others. You can afford to treat people
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  the way you want to be treated, even when they don't return the
• 23:30
  favor. Because your life isn't at the
• 23:32
  mercy of their behavior, it's under the perfect care of your
• 23:35
  Father in Heaven. Prayer without obedience is
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  empty performance. Obedience without prayer is just
• 23:42
  self-reliance. So the life pattern here is a
• 23:44
  constant cycle, bold asking, humble trust, and sustained,
• 23:49
  obedient living. Prayer is that daily confession
• 23:52
  that we are not sufficient for the righteousness Christ
• 23:54
  demands, and our assurance comes only from the Father's
• 23:57
  character, not our own performance.
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  And if we wrap it all up with God's character, we have to hold
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  on to this. If the Father's goodness means
• 24:04
  he will never give a stone or a serpent, then the trials, the
• 24:07
  denials, the delays in our own lives, they have to be
• 24:10
  interpreted through that lens. They can't be evidence of his
• 24:13
  malice or his indifference. They must be the essential means
• 24:16
  by which He is delivering our true eternal good.
• 24:19
  That leaves us with a provocative thought for you to
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  consider when you examine your heart as no from God.
• 24:25
  That one denial or long term struggle that still causes
• 24:28
  confusion or pain. What spiritual stone did the
• 24:31
  Father prevent you from receiving, and what hidden
• 24:33
  serpent did his superior wisdom shield you from?