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Special Podcast: The Kindest Thing You Will Ever Do! · Naughty But Nice with Rob Shuter

0:08
Speaker 1: Terrible advice, lower level, lower level, low It's wrong shooter.
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Speaker 1: Thank you for joining me for our weekend special edition
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Speaker 1: of our podcast. So you know me for all the
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Speaker 1: celebrity news, the gossip, or the entertainment stories. But I'm
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Speaker 1: also a best selling self help author. I don't really
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Speaker 1: like that term self help. I don't think about this
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Speaker 1: stuff as help. I think about it as essential, real
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Speaker 1: life tools that we should all know, we should all practice,
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Speaker 1: and so we're going to call it that today Instead
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Speaker 1: of self help, I want to talk about some of
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Speaker 1: the most valuable lessons that I've learned, that I've taught,
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Speaker 1: they've helped other people with, that they've helped me with,
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Speaker 1: and so maybe they might just help you. Today's topic
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Speaker 1: is the kindest thing you will ever do, the kindest
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Speaker 1: thing you will ever do. Envy and jealousy are indicators
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Speaker 1: that you have not yet fully accepted yourself. Jealousy it's
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Speaker 1: not about somebody else, It's about you. It's about those
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Speaker 1: dreams that are deep down inside you that have never
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Speaker 1: been realized. In fact, jealousy is a cry for attention
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Speaker 1: from passions that want to be fulfilled. So we must
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Speaker 1: stop thinking about jealousy like it's a bad thing. Instead,
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Speaker 1: let's start seeing it as a lighthouse pointing us towards
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Speaker 1: what will make us really happy. Jealous feelings are a
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Speaker 1: really powerful map. They show you what you want in life.
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Speaker 1: So sit up and pay attention to them. And the
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Speaker 1: next time you are jealous, I know those feelings are
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Speaker 1: teaching you about yourself, not anybody else. Follow them, Follow
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Speaker 1: them like a compass, because they will show you where
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Speaker 1: you really want to be in your life. Don't forget
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Speaker 1: there's enough room for everybody to succeed, including you. Someone
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Speaker 1: else's success does not make you a failure, because you're
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Speaker 1: not in competition with anybody but yourself. Turn that jealousy
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Speaker 1: into action, and that action into acceptance. When you become
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Speaker 1: a fan, a fan of the person who once made
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Speaker 1: you green with envy, you will start to come inspired.
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Speaker 1: Observe them and their behavior and find out how they
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Speaker 1: got to where you want to be. Transform that jealousy
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Speaker 1: into admiration, and what you admire will eventually become part
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Speaker 1: of your life too. Desiring what other people have means
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Speaker 1: you've still got a lot of work to do, which
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Speaker 1: is perfectly natural. But we do have to do the
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Speaker 1: work because nothing is kinder than accepting yourself. In fact,
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Speaker 1: accepting yourself is the kindest thing you will ever do,
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Speaker 1: because acceptance is the cornerstone of kindness. It's that simple.
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Speaker 1: The more you accept, the more kindness will be in
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Speaker 1: your life. Think about it. When you're cruel to other people,
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Speaker 1: it's because you don't accept them or what they are doing.
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Speaker 1: The same is true when you are cruel to yourself.
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Speaker 1: You're cruel to yourself because you haven't accepted everything about yourself.
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Speaker 1: And I get it, I really do get it. Acceptance
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Speaker 1: is really, really hard. It doesn't happen in an hour
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Speaker 1: or a day or even a week. It takes a
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Speaker 1: really long time, which is why we need to start
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Speaker 1: right now. Becoming comfortable in your own skin, that I know,
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Speaker 1: is a lifelong challenge and it needs constant attention. But
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Speaker 1: the more you practice, the easier it becomes. Think about
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Speaker 1: accepting yourself every single day, every single day, until it
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Speaker 1: becomes a habit as natural as breathing or waking up
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Speaker 1: in the morning. That is the goal. Most people think
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Speaker 1: acceptance is being totally comfortable and honest with themselves about
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Speaker 1: everything they are. However, that's only half the story. Acceptance
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Speaker 1: is also about being totally honest and comfortable with everything
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Speaker 1: you are not. It's hard, but that's total acceptance. It's
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Speaker 1: only when you truly accept everything about yourself, everything what
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Speaker 1: you are and what you are not, that you can
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Speaker 1: be a hundred percent at peace with yourself. And this
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Speaker 1: is only possible when you start beating yourself up. Embrace
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Speaker 1: where you are and where you are not right now
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Speaker 1: in your life, stop racing towards the finish lion, and
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Speaker 1: starting joining the journey along the way. It's so so
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Speaker 1: easy to take life for granted. Recently, I was rushing
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Speaker 1: from appointment to appointment thinking of all the things I
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Speaker 1: needed to do, and this hang out on all the
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Speaker 1: small moments that happen in between. When you only think
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Speaker 1: about checking off each task on your to do list
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Speaker 1: and moving on to the next, you fall into the
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Speaker 1: trap of finding more and more things to do rather
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Speaker 1: than finding more happiness. None of us need more things
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Speaker 1: to do. We don't need to keep adding to add
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Speaker 1: to do list, but we do need to find more happiness.
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Speaker 1: So slow down, don't speed up, and remember life needs
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Speaker 1: to be full of moments of acceptance. Hey, there was
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Speaker 1: a point in my life when I would beat myself
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Speaker 1: up all the time. There was a point where I
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Speaker 1: couldn't remember a time when I didn't think about my
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Speaker 1: big nose or my soft jaw line that made it
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Speaker 1: difficult to know where my neck began and my face ended.
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Speaker 1: And also to my bad skin. I would obsess about it,
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Speaker 1: and on top of that that my arm was damaged
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Speaker 1: when I was born. I came very close to having amputated.
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Speaker 1: All this put together, you could understand why I didn't
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Speaker 1: exactly feel like a movie star. For years, I long
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Speaker 1: to be super handsome with two perfect arms. I dreamed
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Speaker 1: about how different my life would be if I had
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Speaker 1: the skin of Brad Pitt. And it wasn't just my
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Speaker 1: physical appearance that I was so unkind about. I was
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Speaker 1: equally cruel about feeling that I was not enough. We
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Speaker 1: talked about that on last week's podcast. Not an opportunity
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Speaker 1: could pass me by that I couldn't use to make
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Speaker 1: myself feel even worse, comparing myself to those who were richer,
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Speaker 1: better looking, more popular, and more perfect than me. Until
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Speaker 1: I chose to stand up against those relentless bullies inside
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Speaker 1: my head, and for the first time in my life,
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Speaker 1: I started to accept myself it was the kindest thing
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Speaker 1: I probably will ever do. Finely, I worked out who
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Speaker 1: I am and who I'm not, and finally I've made
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Speaker 1: peace with both. Instead of being brutal, I am now compassionate.
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Speaker 1: Instead of judging, I now fully accept, And instead of
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Speaker 1: choosing to be cruel, I choose to be kind. After all,
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Speaker 1: the kindest thing you will ever do is accept yourself.
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Speaker 1: It's not even nice with