Latest / Intentional Guy / The War On Masculinity Is Real
Transcript
- Michael Chestnut: What if I told you that the most counter-cultural thing a man can do today is need another man? Not in the way the world walks, not in weakness, but in the way that iron meets iron, with force, with friction, and with purpose. Welcome to the intentional guy and iron on the go. I'm glad you're here today. We're talking about something the culture has tried to strip from men, godly brotherhood. And we're going to look at what the word of God actually says about what it looks like for men to sharpen one another. Here in the world we live in, masculinity has been labeled toxic. Men have been told to sit down, be quiet, and feel less, or at least feel differently. And in that vacuum, a lot of men have done one of two things. They either bought the lie and got soft in the wrong ways, passive, disengage, directionalist, or they've overcorrected and gone hard in the wrong way. Isolated, proud, accountable to no one. Both roads lead to the same place, a man alone. And a man alone is a man in danger. But here's what I know. The Bible does not call us to be alone. And the Bible does not shy away from what it means to be. a man. Let's go to the text, Proverbs 27 verse 17. As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 27, 17, five words. Five words carry everything, iron on iron. You know what that process looks like. It's not gentle. It's not comfortable. When a blade is sharpened, there is friction. There are sparks. There is resistance. And the result is something sharper, something more useful, something better equipped for the work it was made for. That is what godly brotherhood looks like. Not men who just agree with each other. Not men who make each other feel good. Men who make each other better. Now look at Proverbs 27-6. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses. Proverbs 27-6. A real friend will wound you, not to harm you, but to heal you. An enemy will flatter you right into destruction. The men who only tell you what you want to hear is not your friend. He is your mirror. And you don't need a mirror. You need iron. I want to get honest with you for a minute. The men in my life have made me a better version of myself. Not because they were easy on me. Because they were honest with me. I have sat across the table, usually with a cup of coffee. and told another man where I am struggling, not just where I am thriving, where I am struggling. And that took everything with inside of me because men are conditioned to project strength, not confess weakness. But here's what I found on the other side of that vulnerability, accountability. growth and friendships that are actually worth something when life gets hard. Ecclesiastes 4, 9 through 10 puts it plainly, two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them fall down, one can help the other up, but pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Ecclesiastes 4, 9 through 10. Pity the man who falls with no one to pick him up. That is not a hypothetical. That is a warning. And it is spoken to men who have chosen isolation, either out of pride or out of fear. Now I want to push back on something the culture says. The world says masculinity is a problem. The word says masculinity has a purpose. Look at Jesus. He chose 12 men. He poured into them for three years. He wept in front of them at Lazarus tomb. He prayed on his face in anguish in the garden. He asked his friends to stay awake with him in the darkest hours. That is not weakness. That is the model. A man who was fully God, choosing community, choosing brotherhood, choosing to need people. 1 Samuel 18.1 says this about David and Jonathan. After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David and he loved him as himself. 1 Samuel 18.1, one in spirit. Jonathan later made a covenant with David, not just friendship, covenant. These men were bound to each other in a way the culture today cannot comprehend. And it made both of them better, braver. and more faithful to God. And then Paul writing to the church, therefore encourage one another and build each other up just as in fact you are doing. First Thessalonians 5, 11, build each other up. That's a construction word. That takes work. That takes intentionality. That does not happen. by accident. Here's what I need you to hear. It is your responsibility, yours, to cultivate the right kind of friendships. No one is going to do this for you. And not just friendships where you are being sharpened, friendships where you are sharpening others, because the proverb goes both ways. The iron does not just receive, it gives. You are called to be the kind of man who makes the men around him better. Hebrews 10, 24 through 25 says, and let us consider how we may spur one another on towards love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing. but encouraging one another. And all the more as you see the day approaching, that's in Hebrews 10, 24 through 25, spur. That is not a gentle word. A spur moves something that doesn't want to move. Some of your friends need you to be the one who spurs them, who shows up, who asks the hard question. who refuses to let them stay comfortable in something that is going to cost them. That's not toxic. That's love. That is the most masculine thing you can do for another man. Here's where I'm going to ask you something to do today. Not next week, but today. I get coffee with men at least once a week, sometimes more. And I want to challenge you to do the same, but make it intentional. Here's what that looks like. First, pick one man who you want to invest in or be sharpened by. Text him today, not tomorrow, today. Just say, hey, can we grab coffee this week? I want to connect. That's it. One text. Second, when you sit down with him, be honest. Tell him one place you're thriving and one place you're struggling. Watch what happens when you model that kind of honesty. Third, ask him how you can sharpen him, not how you can help him feel better, how you can help him be better. Ask what he's working on spiritually. Ask what's he fighting for. Ask. what he needs a brother for. Fourth, make it a rhythm. Once a week, same man or different men, but protect that time like it's sacred, because it is. The enemy wants you to isolate. Do not give him that ground. Men, the world is going to keep telling you that you are the problem. Let the Word of God tell you something different. You were made for this. You were made to carry weight, to bear burdens, to run hard, and to bring men with you. You were made to be iron. So go find your iron and let God sharpen you through him. Thanks for being here on Iron on the Go. Share this with a man who needs it. And I'll see you next time.