Latest / Real STRength with Sarah Draper / Finding Strength Through Life’s Winding Paths with Shaila Buckley | #29

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Finding Strength Through Life’s Winding Paths with Shaila Buckley | #29 · Real STRength with Sarah Draper

• speaker-0: Failing as a realtor actually was great for being an estate planning attorney. speaker-1: When you're in the mire it sometimes doesn't feel like you're gonna get it figured out. speaker-0: give yourself permission to not be a hundred percent at everything. Our job at this point is to just get, you know, our parents and our loved ones to the end with as much dignity as possible. Even when you're in the thick of things and even when things are really hard, you will get through it on the other end, right? Just put one foot in front of other and, you know, keep trying. speaker-1: Welcome to the Real Strength Podcast, where we explore stories of resilience, performance, creating joy, and finding meaning in life. I'm your host, Sarah Draper, and I'm so glad you're here. This is Real Strength. Welcome to the Real Strength Podcast. I'm your host, Sarah Draper, and I'm so glad you're here. Today I'm joined by Shiloh Buckley, the founder of Shiloh Buckley Law. Shiloh is a Stanford educated attorney who's built her practice around Estate planning. So she's serving clients during some of the most challenging and vulnerable moments of their lives. What I love about her story and who she is is not just her legal expertise, which is immense, but her balance with family and real life, building a practice that reflects her values, bringing real impact into her community, a community I share with her and navigating the unique pressures that come with being. both an advocate for others and running a small business. So Shila, welcome to Real Strength. speaker-0: Thank you so much for having me. I'm really excited for our conversation. I am speaker-1: too and I just want to start by saying I just said it but how much I appreciate you and what you do and you've guided me personally through some challenging times in my own life with navigating some changing dynamics with my mom and I know you know I know you know your stuff really really well and I also know you as a friend so we're gonna we're gonna dive into some of that today and I would love to start with your background like How you ended up where you are doing what you're doing. speaker-0: Yeah, so I do estate planning. So I have my own estate planning firm and estate planning is just helping people set up wills and trusts and plan for end of life and then also helping their loved ones after someone has passed figure out what the next steps are and how to, you know, distribute their assets and help people make sure their wishes are fulfilled and make sure things are easy and smooth. I started out my legal career many years ago as a litigator. And what litigator means essentially is I worked on cases where there'd been a dispute, people were fighting, they hire attorneys and we try to help them mediate that and resolve that through court. And I worked at a lot of big firms in DC, LA, the Bay Area. but it was kind of soul wrenching work because you just felt like you were dropped into this conflict, you didn't create it, you weren't usually advised before it and then you were trying to help people resolve that. but when our kids were one and three, my husband and I were in the Bay Area, we kind of took stock of our lives and looked around and were like, this is crazy. We were both commuting, we were both working, we you know, both had great jobs, but still didn't feel like we could afford a house that was like even big enough to meet our needs. it was kind of those typical coastal sort of struggles. And so we decided to move to Idaho. My roommate from college was here with her husband and we kept visiting and all of a sudden decided, Hey, this is the place to be. Like why, you know, why are we making our life so hard? And we wanted to go when our kids were younger. And so, and so we landed here in Boise. speaker-1: And so you landed here in Boise with a one year old and a three year old. Having come from that litigation career. I wanna come back to some of the skills you learned during l doing litigation as we we get into this. And so you come to Boise and what do you start doing? speaker-0: Yeah. So originally I kinda joked with my husband and I like, Well maybe I should write a book or something and he was speaker-1: I don't know what to do, let's go write a book. speaker-0: Yeah, exactly. It's kinda the common lawyer thing. And he was like, that'd be great, but it's also kind of nice to have two salaries and you know. and so I got a job doing contract work part time, for a local family law firm. And family law sounds super cheery, but in fact it really just means divorce. and again, it's also litigation, right? But this was my first couple of months I was like, This is kind of crazy. It felt like I was working in like a telenovela or something. where people were you know fighting and it was all very instead of when I was working at large law firms on the coast, it was super dry. It was like big big companies arguing over like minuscule contract terms and just really mind numbingly boring. Family law for the first couple months was super fun. I was like, my gosh, what he had an affair? He did what? speaker-1: Like high drama. speaker-0: High drama. Yeah, in one of the cases like The husband was using espionage techniques where he would like have an email account and then instead of sending emails to his mistress, they would just leave them in the drafts folder of like Al Qaeda or something. It's kind of insane. I was like, Where am I? but then quickly it became part of just the same sort of doldrum of of of fighting. Everybody's unhappy, nobody's their best selves. I think the only person that benefited was my husband because I would come home and be like, You're so nice and wonderful. You're not like these crazy people I'm dealing with every day. and so I was pretty like kind of lost at that point because I was like, What am I doing? I've got this great law degree. I you know, I want to use my skills, but this isn't how I want to use them. So while I was working there, I got my real estate license because I've always loved open houses and you know just that area of like buying and selling real estate just seemed super fun. and so I got my real estate license and and I did it part-time for a couple of years pretty like full force. I was working as an attorney still but I was on the you know on the weekends and evenings I was doing real estate and it was great. I was fantastic when I had a transaction. I was super good at working with clients, but a lot of real estate is acquiring clients. And that's hard. You have to kind of have that real estate edge, that kind of smoothness. And you also kind of have to be able to get people who are sort of like a little tentative to be like, no, this is the right, you know, come work with me, I'll show you a house. there's just a certain salesness to it that I didn't have that gift. and so I did fine as a realtor, but it wasn't like The world exploded, you know, I wasn't the next Lizzie Bishop who's like this phenomenal realtor in town who signs are everywhere. Yeah, she's phenomenal. I've I've met her. She's amazing. but anyways, I just it didn't explode in the way that I kind of, you know, had my bar set. and so at that point I was like really like, my gosh, what am I doing? Like, and this is, you know, I'm I'm not enjoying being a lawyer, I'm not enjoying being a realtor, or I'm not being good at being a realtor. And so I it it all kind of came to a head. My daughter had gotten sick. I was really tired of working at this law firm. I didn't love my boss and he in the in in the mix of my daughter being sick, he just was not super supportive in a way that I felt like was merited. And so it was kind of the final straw. I had not loved working for this individual for a while. but there was a kind of a final straw and I just quit. I was like, I'm out of here. I did it over Christmas break, I emptied my office. And then I promptly broke my foot. Okay. And so so I'm unemployed. I've quit my job. My husband's like, What are we doing? Like, what are you doing here? trying to be supportive, but also like, what's the plan? And then I break my foot. And so I'm on my couch and I've always been interested in estate planning. I did a little tiny smidgen of it when I was a summer intern. And so I'm on my couch and I open my laptop and I'm just like, Google, how do you become an estate planning attorney? Yeah. And surprisingly, there were these two attorneys, young women attorneys who are probably in their early thirties, who had started this course called Become an Estate Planning Attorney. And what the course focused on wasn't the legal side, because that's easy for me, getting my head around the law. It was more about like how to open your business, like literally the mechanics of like, this is the software that you need, this is what you do. This is where you get, you know, how you get malpractice insurance. And so I bought the course, went through it, did all the modules, and then like, you know, learned the law and then inexplicably had the hoot spa to be like, All right, I'm gonna do this. And I hung up my shingle and that's you know, and that was almost eight years ago. but I know when we were talking earlier, you'd mentioned like where you failed and like Certainly failing as a realtor actually was great for being an estate planning attorney because as a realtor you just have to be able to talk to anybody. I did so many open houses and were s you know spent so much time chatting with people. And so that was great because that's all that estate planning is about. It's about marketing, it's about talking to people, it's about giving presentations, which I learned and honed those skills being a realtor in my sort of first failed effort. And that all brought that to you know, but that helped me become a very successful estate planning attorney. speaker-1: Thank you. Did you see that right away? Did you recognize that right away? Because sometimes as we're going through these struggles, it takes a while. It takes like something else to help us see what that really meant. Did you recognize that once you got into opening your practice, your estate planning firm? Did you speaker-0: Yeah, I mean it took me a little bit of time to realize that not that the to put the dots together, but more it made I what I began to realize was, hey, other attorneys aren't doing this. They're not marketing their firms, they don't seem super comfortable interacting with people, they're not trying to do presentations and talk to the public about these issues, they aren't interested in like graphics and having a good website and all of those things and all of a sudden then at one point the light bulb went off and I like, my gosh, this is I learned all of this by, you know, trying to be a real estate agent and yet here I am applying this to being an estate planning attorney. speaker-1: That is really I really powerful to to think about or to reflect on that, right? So not just the skills of marketing, so important for any business owner, not just the outreach that you do and the positive impact you have in your community. I mean, so important for anyone who's really trying to create a you're you're your best self. I mean you talked about that idea of your how do you, you know, being your best self, but also you're bringing that out into the world to help others do that as well. But I suspect you also brought some skills from your litigation experience into the work you do too. speaker-0: Absolutely. So part of it is that I after graduating from Stanford, I worked at several, you know, really large international law firms doing litigation. And part of it is just being sort of raised as an attorney in that environment. You know, you're working for, you know, big, large corporations. The level of professionalism is extremely high. You have to be accurate. You have to be able to balance lots of, you know, various activities and tasks and you're drafting things and you're responding to email, but you have to always be right because if an attorney makes a mistake, it's a really big deal. And so I think that another reason that I've been so successful is having had those experiences and having learned how to be an attorney at large law firms where the level of expectation and precision was so high that I bring that same level of professionalism to my estate planning practice. And I think Clients really respond to that. They like how organized we are, they like how efficient we are, and they like just how clear our documents are. And so that definitely came from those skills I learned as a litigator. speaker-1: that's that's great. So you've got that precision, you've got that clarity. I suspect there's probably some conflict resolution capabilities that go in there at times too when you're working with people and different ideals on what's supposed to happen with an estate plan. speaker-0: Yeah, I think that it you definitely having had the litigation experience, you certainly have an eye for what could go wrong. And so that's super helpful because one of the main goals of estate planning is to make everything clear so that you avoid conflict and problems when you pass. And so having worked on the other side and seen all the problems that can happen, I bring that sort of eye to being a you know, to estate planning to try to help people make sure that they can work through their conflicts and also can figure out how to make things clear for their loved ones. speaker-1: Yeah. So I I know you can't like give any advice. I don't want to ask for any l legal advice or or anything like that. Just in in big, maybe big buckets if you're able to. I I look back to my own experience, right? So my parents had a a will and a trust, a revocable trust, right? And then I I was just aware of it until my dad passed and then I went through the whole process with my mom of updating and all that stuff. So I got to know her estate planner a bit, the attorney during that time. And then on my own end, my husband and I and are you know doing doing our own work. So I've got my own experiences and they mine have been largely, largely positive, because we haven't had any disagreements within the families on on steps forward. So someone's sitting here listening to this and they're like, I don't even know where to begin because like my sister wants this and my brother's there and I've got the you know like What is a good first step for a person to even begin to think about this if they've not done that yet? speaker-0: So I think there's kind of two ways to look at it. So first is for yourself. You want to get your own documents in order. It's kind of the idea of when you're on the plane, put your air mask on first before getting others short at. And with estate planning, it's something that a lot of people have on their to do list. Right. But because it doesn't feel urgent, it just kind of lingers there. I mean, I think we all have those to those items on our to do list where you're just like, it's carrying over to the next one and the next one. And estate planning is always one of those. And we always have clients come in and the first thing they say is, my gosh, we've been meaning to do this for and then you know, insert number of years, right? and so taking the steps to get your own estate plan in order is really important. And by that, just you know, making sure that you have a will or a trust that says what happens to your assets when you pass. Especially if you have kids having a guardian nominated. Even if you have young adult kids who maybe are older and don't need guardians, you still don't want them to inherit all their assets when they you when you die, you know, at age twenty one. The average twenty one year old will spend all of his or her assets, regardless of whether it's fifty thousand dollars or five million within eleven months. So I speaker-1: Love to have that statistic. That's been another discussion point in families over time. And we're all at the you know, they get it later. speaker-0: Yeah. Yeah. No, it's kind of crazy. And you know, what's even crazier is that the University of Ohio did a study where they looked at individuals of all ages. So these are, you know, rational adults, you know, and not twenty one year olds, but you know, people with fully formed prefrontal cortex who've been managing their own money for a long time. And a study followed people who got large inheritances that were sort of disproportionate to their own income level. And it could be five hundred thousand, it could be ten million, whatever it was. And they followed people for this group of people for three years. And at the end of the third year, more than half of the people in this study had a net worth less than it was when they got the inheritance. speaker-1: Well, speaker-0: More than half. Yeah. And we've talked to clients who every time I say that statistic, somebody'll say, yeah, my friend or so and so And it's always this story of like I just was spending and spending and spending and didn't really I thought it'd go on forever and then all of a sudden it was all gone. speaker-1: It was all gone and then I owed some 'cause I wasn't tracking as I went. my goodness. Exactly. Yeah. So having those conversations, right? Just even starting a dinner table, if you will, if they're you know, dinner table conversation about the idea of it is a good idea. speaker-0: Yeah, I mean I think you take the first step and you really, you know, if you're married, you and your spouse make an appointment and go talk to an estate planning attorney. just, you know, the right attorney will make it easy. They usually have a questionnaire that you need to fill out. You can, you know, fill that out and then just get started on it and get something in place for yourself. And then I know, you know, we've talked a little bit about this sandwich generation. Yeah, I'd love to. And so speaker-1: Yeah, please. speaker-0: Yeah. Uh-huh. So one of the things, and this is actually harder than taking care of yourself, is making sure as much as possible that your parents are organized. And that can be super challenging. there's sort of a range of people of our parents' generation as far as their approach to these things. Some people are over here and they're like, I want my kids involved, I want them to know everything that's going on, I want to talk to them about it. Then there's this other gen, you know, this other group over here that says, I'm not going to tell you anything. It's my job, my money. Don't get in my business. And you can't necessarily control where your parents fall within that range, but it's helpful to try to make you know to just ask them basic questions. Do you have an estate plan? Do you have powers of attorney? things like that, especially if you're a caretaker, are huge. Having powers of attorney in place, which are documents in which you appoint an agent. to act on your behalf with respect to either your finances or your healthcare information. It's super important to have those when you are caring for someone, even if they're not incapacitated. When you get to a certain age, it just gets hard to do something. speaker-1: Yeah. Thank you for sharing that because that's been my lived experience with my with my mom. When my dad passed right, there were two of them that were pretty well managed enough and and I think I had a decent verbal idea of what was going on. it wasn't until my dad passed that I just sat down at his old computer and I, you know, waited until the bills came in, opened them all up and I just sat and started nugging away with the spreadsheet like All right, what do what do the finances even look like? How do I get into accounts? Where is the stuff? Because my not that they hadn't thought about that, but my dad had an illness. He had illnesses for years, but he had an illness at the end that came up very suddenly and he passed pretty quickly. He didn't have a time to bring all that together. They'd had a will, they'd had a trust, but like the those things, those details I needed. And then it became a five or six year process of getting all of that in order. with my mom and all l leading to, you know, selling her house this past year. She's now moved across the country and into assisted living and I'm I guess her legal person for everything. And and and so it has it's a journey. It's a process. It's not an easy one. there's emotions tied to it. There's practicalities tied to it. There's, you know, my own you know your own life is going on. So is there a kind of a a a words of reassurance. Someone out there, like I can say, hey, do it. You will get through. You will get through. But when you're in the mire, it sometimes doesn't feel like you're gonna get it figured out. speaker-0: I think it's very hard. my own mother, I was helping with her caretaking a lot. I have high school age kids and it's and I'm running a business and it it's very overwhelming. And I think part of the thing to keep in mind is to just give yourself grace. Okay. And to give yourself permission to not be a hundred percent at everything because it's super hard where your parents have health needs. your kids have emotional needs and you're trying, you know, or they you know, activities and things you want to be involved with and it's really hard. you do get through it, I think trying to sort of be focused on like what's really important, what do I have time for? It but also just giving yourself grace and being like, I've that this is what I can do. I'm doing the very best I can, but not being too hard on yourself. speaker-1: I think that's probably the best w or the most important wisdom or valuable piece of you know, advice I've heard for a long time. I I try to, you know, be joyful, not joyful. I just try to be like positive and uplifting and everything. I do find when I spend time with my mom and where she's at out in public, it gets a little challenging at times. I think I've got a great, you know, great face on and just trying to be reassuring. And the other day I was just visiting her recently and I'd two people in like the same afternoon. So clearly something was going on in my end. They're both like, you're doing a good job. I was like Okay. I remember, you know, like when people would say that to me when my kids were a year old, you know, there's and I'm like, all right. I'm like, well, thank you. I really appreciate and they said it with so much love. You could tell. but I'm like, man, I really appreciate that. Cause just that that little reminder, gosh, of giving yourself grace for not being able to control pretty much, you know, certainly not everything, but a lot of times not much at all. speaker-0: Right, right. Well, and it's challenging 'cause when you're caring for a child, you know, if you're lucky, most children, you know, and you have a healthy child, they're getting bigger, they're getting more independent, they're growing, you know, this time that you're investing is really you can see the fruits of your labor. And it's kind of the opposite when you're caring for parents. Now, my mom had a degenerative disease, she had Parkinson, so you know, she was definitely getting worse and worse and it's hard because as much t you can't solve their problems. And that's what I would have a hard time with because you know, when she stopped being able to use her cell phone very well, I was like, okay, what can I do? And I got on Amazon and I got her a simple cell phone. And, you know, that didn't lasted for a little bit, but she had a hard time with that. Then I got her a phone, you know, just a regular old fashioned phone. and it helped a little bit and it help but you can't solve all the problems. You can't take away all their pain. You can't solve their disease. And so that's what's kind of a mind shift as to just be okay sitting with it and thinking, you know, how can I what what can I do and what's realistic and being okay that you can't solve everything. My mom had a doctor, her name was Dr. Lisa Kern, she used to practice in bound crossing at that St. Alphonsus. And she retired, but in the context of trying, she retired right when my mom got her Parkinson's diagnosis. And she was such a kind doctor. She gave me her cell phone because I was trying to talk to her before her last day and it but it didn't work out. And so she gave me her cell phone to call her and she said something that really resonated and she said, you know, our job at this point is to just get, you know, our parents and our loved ones to the end with as much dignity as possible. And I think with my mom I tried to keep that in mind that you're just you're just trying to get them to the end, keep them comfortable, give them dignity. respect them, but also understand that this is sort of, you know, an honor that you have of shepherding them to that point. speaker-1: my gosh, the dignity peace. I've witnessed you, your husband in this. I've had the good fortune of seeing you with your mom. And just your presence, like just being there. And that's the one thing I've really taken away from my own experience with my mom is just being there, right? Being with someone and what an incredible gift that is. Like you said, holding that dignity for them. Giving yourself grace. that is real honor. So speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: yeah. my goodness. Okay. So with all of this, you've got a lot. You, I mean, you're pointing out you're raising teenagers, amazing children. You are running your own business, aging parents, everything you've got going on. What do you do to put on your own oxygen mask? How do you take care of yourself with all this happening? speaker-0: I mean it's tricky. You kind of have to try to carve out time. One thing that I'm doing, one thing I kind of finally just decided to bite the bullet and do is and it's kind of silly, but I have a personal trainer to do weightlifting because you know as you get older, you're supposed to be like, you know, and I'm not naturally athletic. I was blessed with my father's sort of thin build. And so I didn't when I was younger, I didn't have to really d do too much to be thin. And so I just and I'm not at all I was also cursed with his poor coordination. And so I've never been super athletic because there's really not a lot to gain from it. and so, but when I turned 50, I was like, I need to sort of embrace that I need to be doing some strength training. And I don't do it. I don't prioritize myself. Like if I say, if I have on my calendar, you know, go to the gym, it doesn't work for me because I've always got a client or a child or something. And I'm like, I can shift that around. But personal training where I have a phenomenal trainer And I you know, you pay for it and so you have to be there 'cause you have to show up for her because you've got the appointment. And so that's been really great for me is just, you know, prioritizing that kind of degree of self care, which I haven't, you know, always been great at. So speaker-1: That's so great. I mean, this is a real strength podcast, right? And so strength in many areas. But let's let's just talk about strength training folks as we launch men and women. Now we're women and and the research I I pay most attention to is with women and then city for long term health for strength training, right? Putting some putting having some higher impact or weight bearing exercises is so critical. for us as we age. I mean, that can not be overstated. So I love that you're doing that. I love that you've hired a personal trainer. And the different people need different levels of accountability. And and that's great. And you so you've got an expert and someone who who's there for you. So you're going to show up for them. speaker-0: Yeah, yeah, exactly. And I'm just not naturally coordinated, so I can't like watch a video and be like, okay, this is what Yeah, hello. I started about I think about two years ago. Yeah. And so, yeah, and I love it. It's great. And it's in a gym, it's close to the office. Lynette, my trainer, owns it. It's all female trainers. It's you know, it's just a great vibe and so I'm really happy that. speaker-1: So what do you notice different about yourself? And this is really geared towards the people who are like, okay, I know I should, should, should, right? Like the people who are like, okay. Like what have you noticed difference in and any quality about you? speaker-0: think that I've noticed, I mean I definitely am just stronger. Just stronger and I don't think I was weak before, but I just noticed like, you know, I can walk longer, go up hills better, just kind of the things that you would imagine. and I'm working on balance because I've never been great at that. And so and I feel like, you know, knock on wood, hopefully that I'm getting better at that. And I have those ankles that like you walk and then you know you hit an uneven surface and they like Yeah, exactly. And so I'm trying to, you know, get ahead of that and get that, you know, gain my balance that way. So I think it's been good and it's just something that I know is important. I don't, you know, I'm not naturally like, let's go exercise. So it's just having my schedule, knowing that I have to go be there. It it works great for me. And I've just bit the bolt and then like that's what it takes. And so that's an important important to do. speaker-1: It's like a non negotiable and now it really is because you've committed yourself to it in that way. did you have a steeper like learning not learning curve, but okay, this is worth it? Or were you right away like, wow, I really like this? Or did you have to get over it was speaker-0: think it was I knew it was a good thing intellectually. and it helps too because Matt, my husband, is very good at like exercising, eating. It's kind of funny 'cause like we'll go to a restaurant and like he'll order a salad and I'll order the cheeseburger. Like you'd think it would be the reverse, but but gender stereotypes or something. But anyways, and so he's been super supportive. He thinks it's great. And that really helps too 'cause he's obviously a good model because he takes good care of himself and he exercises and, you know When he goes to PT, he does all the exercises, you know, and stuff like that. And so so that's been a great model. He's been really supportive. speaker-1: And I love to see you guys out walking. Do you s ye that regularly? speaker-0: We do every night, yeah. Every night practically we go for a nice long walk and it's just a nice time to reconnect and chat about our days and when it's either too hot or too cold, I definitely usually too cold, we can swing, but too hot sometimes we gotta, you know, stay in and I get really antsy. Yeah. speaker-1: Yeah, it's I know, and we just have this super long fall here. So it's been it's been still pretty hot. But I'm so glad you guys are still getting out there. I think the evening walk, and you know Rod and I walk too because we related to each other when we're out there. Yeah, exactly. the evening walk with a partner, I think is like one of the best not that we're doing it to be efficient multitasking, but if you're looking to combine benefits for one thing to do with your partner. An evening walk really hits so many of speaker-0: Yeah. 'Cause you get to check in about your day, share stories, you're out, you're, you know, getting some exercise. It's and you know, with with teenagers, it's great to have a moment of being like, my gosh, what speaker-1: Right. Right. Yeah. You can vent, you can relieve that release that stress. You can talk about strategize. You can do nothing. Sometimes we will walk and we don't even talk. But you're just side by side in the presence of someone you love that you know has your back and is there with you, literally, literally there with you as you're going forward. Sometimes we don't even need to talk. speaker-0: Yeah. Yeah. And I find it's easier to talk. Like it's somehow just I I think there's some I don't know if it's a study or something, but about where men and like eye contact or something. And so when you're sitting across it's harder. I don't I you probably know speaker-1: I know I've got this list of like 28 amazing things or 28 studies, like of different benefits of walking and talking and being in nature and different things. I mean, one of the big things with that is it does increase your psychological safety, right? You can bring up those challenging things because it isn't as confrontational as looking face to face with someone. And also there's that just kind of like you're we're side by side looking forward together, right? So as you're working through something, you're You're you're kind of talking about it as you're creating it, as you're moving forward. sometimes like things come up that can't be resolved on a walk. And that's you know, an a an awareness of that and being able to hold that space with that other person for something comes up that you might need to return to later. but in those circumstances, I'm like, maybe it never would have come up, you know. That's a great way to bring up hey, we need to do an estate plan or something like that. It's like speaker-0: That's true on your walking. speaker-1: Well maybe we should do have you ever heard of an estate plan? I mean, that might be a really good way to start thinking about doing something along those lines. Absolutely. speaker-0: Yeah, yeah. speaker-1: Yeah, it's also super good for us from a blood sugar standpoint because movement helps to start to pull some of the glucose out that we especially after you eat, just like some movement after you eat helps your body maintain the right balance. and evening walk is so good too because. You don't want all that, you know, all that glucose in your bloodstream as you're trying to go to bed. So it helps some say like take take about three hours after your last meal before you go to sleep. But if you don't have that much time, that walk will help speed that process up. Also, the way the light is in the evening, those darker rays, like the sunset rays, help your mind. begin to know through your eyes, right? Your brain recognized your mind, but your brain actually know like, it's this is circadian clock stuff, right? So it's getting warm light, warm colors indicate, it's getting time to go to sleep, right? We're getting to that shutdown stage. So there's so many, so many good benefits to it. speaker-0: I think it's so nice too because I feel like we're so like wedded to our machines and our phones and our screens and so it's just lovely. Like we'll get out and it'll just be like, my gosh, look at how gorgeous the clouds are and it's silly, but it's just something that's just I find it very grounding 'cause especially now where there's the technology's so ubiquitous and it's just hard to get, you know, I'm on a screen during the day if I'm not meeting with clients and then you know, phones are ringing, you know, there's so many ways to like get in touch with people or stay in contact and you know. So I I love it. speaker-1: It's great. I saw one story. It was the other like a couple of weeks back. I was sitting out front, it was dark. We'd already done our walk, or it was not it was sunset time. And one of my neighbors, I see her running down the sidewalk. She's not normally running, she's out walking a lot. I see her running down the sidewalk. I'm like, What did something happen? She's like, Do you see that sunset? I gotta go get my kids. She ran into her house. She grabbed, You gotta speaker-0: Yeah. speaker-1: come see the sunset. Meanwhile, I'm like texting my family, of course, like Texting, you know, look outside, look outside, look at the sun. But you're right. It is just there is nothing as amazing as that awe you feel when you're in nature and you see something just magnificent. That's great. speaker-0: Yes, yeah, yeah. speaker-1: my gosh, Child. Okay. Well let's wrap up with this one last thing here is someone is listening and they're like, Okay, I'm a I'm a small business owner, or I'm at a career transition and yeah, things just aren't aligning for me. Or I also have the teenagers and the aging parents. You know, any of those. Do you have any just like advice, encouragements, inspiration for them? And your whole story is inspiration. But do you have anything to share? speaker-0: think one thing to just keep in mind is is that even when you're in the thick of things and even when things are really hard, you will get through it on the other end, right? It sounds trite, but there is there is there will be a an end and you will, you know, move forward. And I think especially for me, I try to, you know, kind of impart to my kids that like life works in really winding ways. And things where you, for example, with my real estate where I was like, I'm not the greatest realtor in all of Boise. but I took off, you know, I got so many valuable lessons from that. And at the time, if you told me, well, you're not gonna be a great realtor, but guess what? You're gonna use all these skills in the future, I would have been like, that's crazy. But that's exactly what happened. And so I think if you look back through points in your life where there have been challenges, I think sometimes when you have the perspective of time you can take from those experiences and be like, well actually even though that was really unfortunate or unpleasant or unhappy it was a phase when I was unhappy, the hope is that there's something that you gain from that where it puts you in sort of some more positive direction. And so for me at least I always you know, and of course when you're in the thick of it it's really hard to feel that way. But it I have a lot of gratitude that that's sort of, you know, the way things turned out. And so I think it's Even when you're in the thick of it it's hard, but just put one foot in front the other and, you know, keep trying. speaker-1: Thank you. my goodness. Shila, thank you so much. So, you know, sharing honest with it's just such openness, right? talking about grace, honoring yourself, showing up with dignity for other people, and this deep kind of in introspective reflection, like life works in these winding ways, right? And and finding value in the crazy paths we end up on. what it's just a beautiful visualization of of of how it it works in these mysterious ways. and to keep keep keep going, you know, keep taking those those steps. So thank you again for being here and to everyone listening. great. So you can find Shla at Shyla Buckley Law, right? Is there any other way that they can find you? speaker-0: You can find me on estate planning for Idahoans.com. That also comes to our website because Shiloh can be a little hard to find. And then I've got a book on estate planning out on Amazon, Estate Planning for Idahoans. And also I'm also a co-author of the Trustees Guide, which is published by NOLO and that's also on Amazon. So speaker-1: Great. Thank you for sharing all of those and just for demonstrating all of us this courage and resilience to keep showing up every day, taking those steps forward and through that making a huge impact in your the lives of those closest to you, as well as your very, very broad community. So thank you again. And everyone, thank you for being here. I am Sarah Draper and keep building the life you're working for with real strength.