Latest / PAMOJA PODCAST | PAMOJA MINISTRY, A LIFE OF CHRIST INTERNATIONAL MINISTRIES / PAMOJA MINISTRY — REFINED FOR A PURPOSE CONVERSATION XII — WHEN GOD CORRECTS THE PERSON HE LOVES
Transcript
- 0:00Welcome back to our continuing conversation on
- 0:03Refined for a Purpose. In our last conversation,
- 0:08we talked about the crack before the collapse.
- 0:11We discovered the collapse rarely begins on the
- 0:14day everybody sees it. Usually, something has
- 0:18been cracking quietly for a long time. A boundary
- 0:22moves. A compromise is justified. An attitude
- 0:26is excused. A warning is ignored. A conviction
- 0:30is silenced, and slowly, something that once
- 0:33seemed small can begin threatening something
- 0:36much larger. But we also discovered something
- 0:40hopeful. God revealing the crack does not mean
- 0:44the structure is worthless. Sometimes revelation
- 0:48is the beginning of restoration. Sometimes conviction
- 0:52is protection. Sometimes God allows us to see
- 0:56what is weakening. while there is still time
- 0:59to repair it. And that brought us to another
- 1:02question. What happens when God doesn't simply
- 1:06show us the crack, but begins dealing with it?
- 1:11What happens when God confronts an attitude,
- 1:14when He interrupts a pattern, when He challenges
- 1:17our pride, when He allows consequences, when
- 1:21He uses His word, circumstances or people to
- 1:25tell us something has to change? Because if we
- 1:28are not careful, we can interpret correction
- 1:31as rejection. We can begin asking, God, are you
- 1:36angry with me? Have you abandoned me? Did I lose
- 1:39my purpose? Is everything over? But Hebrews 12
- 1:43gives us another perspective. It tells us the
- 1:47Lord disciplines the one he loves. Think about
- 1:51that. Scripture connects discipline with love.
- 1:55And perhaps this is one of the most difficult
- 1:58dimensions of being refined for a purpose. Sometimes
- 2:01God's love comforts us. Sometimes God's love
- 2:06carries us. Sometimes God's love restores us.
- 2:10And sometimes God's love corrects us. So today,
- 2:14I want us to have a conversation about something
- 2:17we don't always like talking about when God corrects
- 2:21the person he loves. Because correction is not
- 2:24always rejection. Sometimes, correction is rescue.
- 2:30And before we go any further, we need to establish
- 2:34something important. Not every painful season
- 2:37is God correcting you. Jesus rejected the simplistic
- 2:42idea that every tragedy or suffering must be
- 2:45traced directly to someone's personal sin. In
- 2:49John 9, the disciples saw a man who had been
- 2:52blind from birth and asked Jesus, who sinned,
- 2:55this man or his parents? Jesus refused their
- 2:59assumption, and that matters, because sometimes
- 3:03we can become spiritually unhealthy by interpreting
- 3:05every hardship as, God must be punishing me.
- 3:09You lost your job. God is punishing me. A relationship
- 3:14ended. God is punishing me. You became sick.
- 3:19God is punishing me. A door closed. God is punishing
- 3:23me. No. Life is more complicated than that. We
- 3:28live in a broken world. People make choices.
- 3:31We make choices. There are natural consequences.
- 3:35There are spiritual battles. There are circumstances
- 3:38we simply do not understand. And sometimes, suffering
- 3:42has nothing to do with personal correction. So
- 3:46this conversation is not an invitation to become
- 3:49afraid of God every time something goes wrong.
- 3:52It is an invitation to become teachable when
- 3:55God is actually correcting us. There is a difference,
- 4:00and that difference requires discernment. Instead
- 4:04of immediately asking, God, why are you punishing
- 4:08me? Maybe the healthier prayer is God. What are
- 4:13you saying to me through this season? If there
- 4:16is something to correct, show me. If there is
- 4:19something to learn, teach me. If there is something
- 4:23to release, help me release it. And if this season
- 4:28has nothing to do with correction, give me the
- 4:31faith to walk through it without falsely condemning
- 4:34myself. Because God does not call us to live
- 4:38under constant fear. He calls us to walk with
- 4:42Him. And now we need to understand why love sometimes
- 4:48corrects. Hebrews 12 says, Those are two completely
- 5:10different reactions. One person receives correction
- 5:14and says, it doesn't matter. Another receives
- 5:18correction and says, everything is over. Scripture
- 5:23says neither response is healthy. Don't dismiss
- 5:26correction, but don't allow correction to convince
- 5:30you that you have been abandoned. That balance
- 5:33is powerful, because when God corrects you, The
- 5:37goal is not destruction. The goal is formation.
- 5:42Hebrews continues by saying that discipline later
- 5:45produces a harvest of righteousness and peace
- 5:49for those who have been trained by it. Trained
- 5:53by it. That means correction is supposed to produce
- 5:56something. Wisdom, humility, discipline, maturity,
- 6:01self -control, righteousness, peace. God is not
- 6:05simply saying You were wrong. He is saying, I
- 6:08am teaching you another way to live. Correction
- 6:12that only produces shame has missed the purpose.
- 6:15Godly correction should move us toward transformation.
- 6:20Sometimes God loves you too much to let you keep
- 6:24going. Imagine seeing someone you love walking
- 6:28toward danger. Would love remain silent? If your
- 6:32child was walking toward traffic, would you say,
- 6:35I don't want to interfere with their choices.
- 6:38No. Love would interrupt. Love might shout. Love
- 6:43might grab them. The interruption could feel
- 6:47uncomfortable, but the discomfort would not mean
- 6:50hatred. The interruption would be evidence of
- 6:53love. And sometimes we want God to love us without
- 6:57interrupting us. We want God to bless our plans,
- 7:01bless our relationships, bless our decisions.
- 7:05Bless our ambitions, bless our habits, bless
- 7:09our direction. But sometimes God's answer is,
- 7:13no, I love you too much to bless what is destroying
- 7:16you. And that can hurt, because we may have already
- 7:21become emotionally attached to what God is confronting.
- 7:26Maybe it is a relationship, maybe an attitude,
- 7:30maybe pride, maybe an ambition, maybe a habit.
- 7:34Maybe the way we speak, maybe the way we handle
- 7:37authority, maybe something we have convinced
- 7:41ourselves we need, and then God puts his finger
- 7:45on it and says, this cannot continue. That moment
- 7:49can feel like loss, but perhaps what feels like
- 7:53God taking something from you is actually God
- 7:56protecting something greater within you. David
- 8:02teaches us, that mercy does not always remove
- 8:05consequences. David gives us one of scripture's
- 8:09most difficult examples. David sinned with Bathsheba.
- 8:14He abused his authority. He arranged circumstances
- 8:17that resulted in Uriah's death. Then Nathan confronted
- 8:21him and David said, I have sinned against the
- 8:25Lord. Nathan told him that the Lord had taken
- 8:28away his sin. There was forgiveness. but there
- 8:33were still consequences. And this is where we
- 8:37sometimes misunderstand grace. We think forgiveness
- 8:41means consequences should disappear. But forgiveness
- 8:45and consequences are not always the same thing.
- 8:49You can be forgiven and still have something
- 8:51to repair. You can be forgiven and still need
- 8:55to rebuild trust. You can be forgiven and still
- 8:59need to apologize. You can be forgiven and still
- 9:03have to accept responsibility. You can be forgiven
- 9:07and still have to live through the consequences
- 9:10of decisions you made. And consequences do not
- 9:14necessarily mean God has rejected you. Sometimes
- 9:18consequences become part of the classroom. David
- 9:22was forgiven, but David was also changed. Psalm
- 9:2651 reveals a man who no longer merely wants the
- 9:29situation fixed. He wants himself changed. He
- 9:33prays, create in me a clean heart, O God, and
- 9:37renew a right spirit within me. That is maturity.
- 9:41Immaturity says, God, remove the consequence.
- 9:46Maturity eventually learns to pray, God, change
- 9:50whatever in me help create this. That is refinement.
- 9:55And sometimes God corrects our success, not just
- 9:58our failure. We often think correction only comes
- 10:02after obvious sin, but God also corrects attitudes
- 10:07that could become dangerous later. Look at Paul.
- 10:112 Corinthians 12 tells us Paul received extraordinary
- 10:15revelations, and then Paul describes what he
- 10:19calls a thorn in the flesh. Christians have debated
- 10:24for centuries exactly what that thorn was. And
- 10:28scripture does not give us enough information
- 10:30to settle every detail. But Paul tells us something
- 10:34important about its purpose. He says it was connected
- 10:38to keeping him from becoming conceited because
- 10:41of the greatness of the revelations. Think about
- 10:44that. The danger was not simply failure. The
- 10:49danger was what success could produce inside
- 10:52him. Pride. And Paul prayed repeatedly for the
- 10:56thorn to leave. But God's answer was, my grace
- 11:01is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect
- 11:05in weakness. Sometimes we are asking God to remove
- 11:09something while God is using that very season
- 11:12to keep something else from growing inside us.
- 11:17Again, we need humility here. We should not label
- 11:21every difficulty a thorn or assume every unresolved
- 11:25problem is God's discipline. But Paul's testimony
- 11:29teaches us something important. God is concerned
- 11:33not only with where you are going, but with who
- 11:36you are becoming while you get there. Sometimes
- 11:40success needs refinement too, because pride can
- 11:43destroy what suffering never could. Peter shows
- 11:49us the difference between condemnation and correction.
- 11:53Peter denied Jesus three times. Imagine the shame.
- 11:57Peter had said, even if everyone else falls away,
- 12:00I won't. Then pressure came, fear came, and Peter
- 12:05denied even knowing Jesus. Afterward, he wept
- 12:09bitterly. Now notice what Jesus does after the
- 12:12resurrection. Jesus does not pretend the failure
- 12:15never happened. But he also does not discard
- 12:18Peter. In John 21, Jesus confronts and restores
- 12:23him. Three times Jesus asks, do you love me?
- 12:27And then, feed my sheep. The place of failure
- 12:31becomes a place of restoration. Jesus does not
- 12:35say, Peter, because you failed, your purpose
- 12:38is canceled. But neither does he say, Peter,
- 12:42let's pretend nothing happened. There is confrontation.
- 12:46There is restoration and then there is responsibility.
- 12:50That is important because condemnation says you
- 12:54failed, therefore you are finished. Correction
- 12:58says this must change because there is still
- 13:02purpose ahead of you. Condemnation pushes you
- 13:06away from God. Conviction draws you toward repentance.
- 13:10Condemnation tells you to hide. Conviction tells
- 13:14you to come into the light. Condemnation attacks
- 13:17your identity. Correction addresses your behavior
- 13:21and your character. And Romans 8 .1 reminds us,
- 13:25There is therefore now no condemnation to them
- 13:29which are in Christ Jesus. That does not mean
- 13:33there is no correction. It means correction happens
- 13:37within a relationship of grace. Be careful not
- 13:42to reject the person God uses to correct you.
- 13:45This is difficult because sometimes we want correction
- 13:49directly from heaven. We want an angel, a dream,
- 13:53a voice, a scripture appearing miraculously before
- 13:57us. But sometimes God sends Nathan, a human being,
- 14:02someone who says, you are the man. And suddenly
- 14:06the problem is not whether God is speaking. The
- 14:09problem is that we don't like who he used. Maybe
- 14:13your spouse sees something. Maybe a friend sees
- 14:17something. Maybe a mentor sees something. Maybe
- 14:20a leader confronts something. Maybe someone beneath
- 14:24you sees something your position has prevented
- 14:27others from telling you. Now, human correction
- 14:31is not automatically correct. People can misunderstand
- 14:35us. People can have wrong motives. People can
- 14:39accuse falsely. People can manipulate. So everything
- 14:43must be tested with wisdom, truth, scripture,
- 14:47and prayer. But humility asks, even if I don't
- 14:51like how this was said, is there something here
- 14:54I need to hear? That question can save you because
- 14:58pride asks, who are you to correct me? Humility
- 15:03asks, God, is there truth here for me? Never
- 15:08become so successful that nobody can tell you
- 15:11the truth. Never become so spiritual that you
- 15:14believe you cannot be corrected Never become
- 15:17so powerful that everyone around you becomes
- 15:20afraid to disagree with you Because when accountability
- 15:24disappears the crack can grow without resistance
- 15:29Sometimes the thing you call an attack may actually
- 15:33be an interruption. Now we need discernment here.
- 15:37Not every attack is correction. Not every opposition
- 15:40is from God. Scripture gives us real spiritual
- 15:44warfare. It gives us persecution. It gives us
- 15:47false accusation. It gives us injustice. So we
- 15:51should never casually tell someone, God did this
- 15:55to you because you needed correction. We may
- 15:58not know that, but in our own prayer life, there
- 16:02is a question worth asking. God, is there anything
- 16:07you are trying to teach me here? Because sometimes
- 16:10we become so focused on escaping discomfort that
- 16:13we never investigate whether the discomfort is
- 16:16revealing something. We rebuke everything. We
- 16:19fight everything. We call everything warfare.
- 16:23But what if some moments require reflection before
- 16:26resistance? What if God is using a closed door
- 16:29to expose entitlement? What if conflict is revealing
- 16:33your anger? What if waiting is revealing impatience?
- 16:37What if criticism is exposing insecurity? What
- 16:40if responsibility is exposing poor discipline?
- 16:44What if success is revealing pride? What if disappointment
- 16:47is revealing where your identity has actually
- 16:50been resting? Again, the circumstance itself
- 16:54may not have been sent by God, but God can still
- 16:57use it. God doesn't have to author the fire to
- 17:01use the fire, and that is consistent with everything
- 17:04we have been learning in this season. God doesn't
- 17:09waste the fire. There is a difference between
- 17:14being punished and being trained. Hebrews uses
- 17:17the language of training. That matters. Think
- 17:21about physical training. Training places resistance
- 17:25against the body. Not because the trainer hates
- 17:28the athlete. Because resistance develops strength.
- 17:33The athlete may say, this hurts. And the trainer
- 17:36may answer, I know. But the pain has a purpose.
- 17:42Now every pain in life is not divine training.
- 17:45But when God is refining us, There are moments
- 17:49when obedience becomes uncomfortable. Apologizing
- 17:53hurts pride, forgiving hurts, accepting accountability
- 17:57hurts, changing habits hurts, breaking unhealthy
- 18:02relationships hurts, admitting you were wrong
- 18:05hurts, starting again hurts, waiting hurts, surrendering
- 18:10control hurts. But sometimes the pain is not
- 18:13evidence that the process is wrong. Sometimes.
- 18:17The pain is part of the training. Hebrew says
- 18:21discipline is painful rather than pleasant at
- 18:23the moment. Scripture acknowledges that. God
- 18:27does not pretend correction feels good, but then
- 18:29it says later. I love that word. Later. Later
- 18:35it produces something. Later you understand.
- 18:40Later you see why the boundary was necessary.
- 18:43Later you appreciate the person who told you
- 18:45the truth. Later you understand why God would
- 18:49not let you continue. Later you recognize what
- 18:52could have happened. Later you see the protection
- 18:56inside the correction. Some things only make
- 19:00sense. Later. The purpose of correction is not
- 19:05to keep you in the past. There is another danger.
- 19:09Sometimes after God corrects us, we remain mentally
- 19:12trapped in what we did. We repent. God forgives.
- 19:17We change. But we keep punishing ourselves. Every
- 19:21prayer becomes about the failure. Every new opportunity
- 19:25reminds us of the failure. Every good thing makes
- 19:29us feel unworthy because of the failure. But
- 19:32if repentance has happened, correction is supposed
- 19:35to move you forward. You learn. You grow. You
- 19:40make restitution where possible. You rebuild
- 19:43what needs rebuilding. You accept consequences
- 19:47where necessary and then you walk differently.
- 19:51God does not refine gold so he can spend eternity
- 19:55talking about the impurities he removed. The
- 19:58impurities are removed so the gold can become
- 20:01what the refiner intended. Don't build your identity
- 20:04around the thing God corrected. Let the correction
- 20:07produce wisdom. Let it produce humility. Let
- 20:11it produce compassion. Let it produce boundaries.
- 20:14Let it produce maturity. Let it produce testimony.
- 20:18You are not supposed to remain forever at the
- 20:20place where God confronted you. You are supposed
- 20:23to become different because He did. And this
- 20:29is where grace becomes beautiful. Grace is not
- 20:33God saying nothing matters. Grace is not permission
- 20:37to remain unchanged. Grace does not eliminate
- 20:40truth. Grace does not eliminate responsibility.
- 20:43Grace does not call darkness light. Grace meets
- 20:46us in truth and gives us the power to become
- 20:49different. Titus 2 says the grace of God teaches
- 20:53us to say no to ungodliness and worldly passions
- 20:57and to live self -controlled upright godly lives.
- 21:01Grace teaches. Grace trains. Grace transforms.
- 21:06So when God corrects you, don't run away from
- 21:08grace. Run toward it. Say, God, show me. God,
- 21:13teach me. God, change me. God, forgive me. God,
- 21:17help me repair what I damaged. God, give me discipline
- 21:21so I don't return to what you delivered me from.
- 21:25That is not weakness. That is maturity. So maybe
- 21:29the question is not, Why is God correcting me?
- 21:34Maybe there is a better question. What is God
- 21:36trying to preserve? Maybe He is preserving your
- 21:40marriage. Maybe your family. Maybe your ministry.
- 21:44Maybe your calling. Maybe your character. Maybe
- 21:48your testimony. Maybe your future. Maybe the
- 21:51people who depend on you. Maybe the responsibility
- 21:55you have been praying for. Because sometimes
- 21:59correction is not only about what you did yesterday.
- 22:02Sometimes correction is about what God knows
- 22:05you will need tomorrow. Joseph needed integrity
- 22:08before Pharaoh. Moses needed character for leadership.
- 22:13Peter needed humility before Pentecost. Paul
- 22:16needed dependence on grace while carrying extraordinary
- 22:20revelation. God sees farther than we do. And
- 22:23sometimes he deals with something now because
- 22:26he knows what that something could become later.
- 22:29That is why correction can be protection. That
- 22:33is why discipline can be preparation. And that
- 22:36is why correction is not rejection. But now there
- 22:43is another question. What happens when correction
- 22:46comes after you have already failed? What happens
- 22:50when you saw the crack? but didn't respond. What
- 22:54happens when the boundary was crossed? What happens
- 22:57when the mistake was made? What happens when
- 23:00you cannot undo what you did? What happens when
- 23:04your own decisions contributed to the fire you
- 23:07are now walking through? Can God still use you?
- 23:11Can purpose survive failure? Can mercy reach
- 23:15you when you cannot blame anybody else? Can God
- 23:19restore someone who genuinely got it wrong? Because
- 23:23there is a kind of theology that knows how to
- 23:26talk about holiness before failure, but does
- 23:30not know what to say to the person sitting in
- 23:32the ashes afterward. And yet scripture is filled
- 23:36with people whose weaknesses became visible.
- 23:39David, Peter, Moses, Jacob, and still, God's
- 23:45story with them was not over. So our next continuing
- 23:48conversation will be when failure doesn't cancel
- 23:52purpose mercy in the refining fire. We are not
- 23:55going to use grace as permission to sin. We are
- 23:59not going to pretend choices have no consequences.
- 24:02We are not going to minimize damage. But we are
- 24:05going to ask a deeply biblical question. What
- 24:09does God do with a repentant person who failed?
- 24:13Because perhaps somebody listening to me does
- 24:16not need another warning about the crack. The
- 24:19collapse has already happened. And your question
- 24:22is no longer, how do I prevent it? Your question
- 24:26is, can God still do anything with me now? And
- 24:31if that is you, stay with us because the refiner
- 24:35is not finished. Before we close today, I want
- 24:40you to remember this. If God is correcting you,
- 24:44listen. If he is confronting something, don't
- 24:47immediately defend it. If repentance is necessary,
- 24:51repent. If an apology is necessary, apologize.
- 24:55If something must change, change it. If a boundary
- 24:59must return, restore it. If accountability is
- 25:02needed, receive it. But don't confuse correction
- 25:06with abandonment. Don't allow conviction to become
- 25:09condemnation. and don't allow shame to make you
- 25:13run from the very God who is calling you back.
- 25:16Maybe God is correcting you because there is
- 25:19still something worth protecting. Maybe he is
- 25:22disciplining you because there is still something
- 25:25he intends to develop. Maybe he is interrupting
- 25:29you because he sees where the road leads. Maybe
- 25:32the correction that hurts today is protecting
- 25:35you from something that would hurt much more
- 25:37tomorrow. You ask God to refine you. Sometimes
- 25:41this is what refinement looks like. The refiner
- 25:45sees what we cannot see. The refiner removes
- 25:49what cannot remain. The refiner knows how much
- 25:52heat is necessary. And the refiner does not throw
- 25:56away the goal because he discovers impurities.
- 25:59He keeps working. So receive his comfort, receive
- 26:03his conviction, receive his correction, receive
- 26:07his grace, and keep walking. Because correction
- 26:10is not always rejection, sometimes correction
- 26:14is rescue. And even here, you are still being
- 26:18refined for a purpose.