Latest / Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily / Does it Hurt by H.D. Carlton - Sharks, Smut, and Psychological Damage!

Transcript

Does it Hurt by H.D. Carlton - Sharks, Smut, and Psychological Damage! · Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily

• 0:00
  Hi friends, you're listening to Lose the Plot with Carla and
• 0:03
  Emily in this episode we're reading Does It Hurt by HD
• 0:07
  Carlton? We are talking about the entire
• 0:09
  book, so warning, there will be spoilers.
• 0:26
  I'm Carla. And we broke the fucking table
• 0:29
  like Humpty Dumpty. Bad.
• 0:31
  There's no putting it back together.
• 0:34
  I'm Emily. I'm officially a prune.
• 0:36
  This probably gave me a yeast infection and those sharks are
• 0:38
  two seconds away from breaking in.
• 0:41
  This book gave me a yeast infection.
• 0:43
  Of the brain. It made my brain molding my.
• 0:49
  Ass hurt, Brains molded. My teeth are falling out.
• 0:55
  Before we dive into this juicy episode, we have a tiny favour
• 0:58
  to ask. If you've enjoyed our previous
• 1:00
  episodes and want us to continue creating content, take a moment.
• 1:03
  Right now, click over to our profile and leave us a five star
• 1:06
  review on whichever platform you're using.
• 1:09
  Share with a friend if you know they love SMART.
• 1:11
  Thank you for supporting us. Trigger warnings from the
• 1:17
  authors website. Dear Lord, the fact that I had
• 1:20
  to go on our website anyway. Warning, this is a dark romance
• 1:26
  that contains very triggering situations such as graphic
• 1:29
  violence and gore, graphic murder, graphic language,
• 1:32
  suicide ideation, mentions of suicide, depression and anxiety,
• 1:36
  PTSD, near death, experiences stranded in the middle of the
• 1:40
  ocean. OK yeah, dub non con.
• 1:43
  The fuck does that mean? Non consent.
• 1:46
  OK, but what's dub mean www. It's non consent for sure, is
• 1:52
  it? Yeah, but I don't know it.
• 1:54
  Oh, dubious consent. Yeah, that's why I thought
• 1:56
  dubious. I was like Doug.
• 1:58
  So it's dubious. Non consent.
• 2:00
  Lovely. Charming.
• 2:02
  That's. Just rape.
• 2:05
  Yeah. It says is clear denial before
• 2:09
  sex happens. No, that's sexual assault.
• 2:11
  Actual Don't worry, I'm only half of the morning.
• 2:14
  I'm sorry. Continuing mentions of incest
• 2:19
  and pedophilia not depicted child abuse.
• 2:22
  Mentions of rape and other forms of abuse, kidnapping, and
• 2:24
  explicit sexual situations for 18.
• 2:26
  Plus there are also particular kings such as auto
• 2:30
  assassinophobia, arousal by the risk of being killed.
• 2:34
  OK, yeah, fair breath, play, degradation.
• 2:37
  And I could never say this, but Seder masochism, this whole
• 2:44
  thing was as such a tongue twister asked for Carla.
• 2:47
  Fuck my life. So anyway.
• 2:50
  I know it says dub non consent, right, but the first one's
• 2:55
  straight up right. Yeah, but it's cuter if you say
• 2:59
  I'm consent. No, I'm kidding.
• 3:02
  You're. Looking at me like this is rape
• 3:04
  girl. Dude.
• 3:07
  Even the fact. That you need a paragraph for
• 3:12
  your trigger warning shush. I would just love to read a dark
• 3:16
  romance with no sexual assault, but that's all I'm asking.
• 3:20
  That's basically. The bread and butter, though.
• 3:22
  But is it just like a cop out to write rape?
• 3:26
  Yeah, that's a conversation for a different day.
• 3:33
  We need to have separate comcasts about issues.
• 3:37
  I'm like, there's no there's no convincing me otherwise.
• 3:42
  No, I agree. Can we talk about before we get
• 3:45
  into the actual story, can we talk about the cover?
• 3:47
  It's giving High School Musical in the ocean.
• 3:51
  But it isn't at the same like I don't know what, I don't know
• 3:54
  what I was thinking. It wasn't giving Australia,
• 3:56
  that's for sure. There, Australia.
• 3:59
  Was not a thing. It wasn't.
• 4:01
  It was not a thing, and the things were wrong regardless.
• 4:06
  But the hilarious thing is that HD apparently consulted with
• 4:10
  someone from Australia and someone who's Italian to make
• 4:13
  sure the language was right for the Italian part did.
• 4:16
  Poorly and. The Australian parts were right
• 4:19
  for Australian bitch. No one we don't have man eating
• 4:23
  spiders. Little daddy long legs are going
• 4:26
  to do nothing but exactly nothing.
• 4:28
  I've never seen a magpie fucking circle.
• 4:32
  They don't circle and they don't.
• 4:34
  Squawk. They just squoop.
• 4:35
  They squop, they squop. They just squop right down.
• 4:39
  And she. I mean, she got you with the
• 4:40
  demon birds. They are, in fact, demon birds.
• 4:43
  Yeah, but nobody calls them that here either.
• 4:45
  No. But she wait, OK, She's not
• 4:49
  Australian, though, so the main character, so you can, kind of.
• 4:53
  Yeah. Have some leeway about she
• 4:55
  doesn't even know everything about Australia, but what was
• 4:58
  depicted in the book was stupid. It was stupid.
• 5:00
  OK, the most stupid. Of all, Oh my.
• 5:03
  God the most stupid of all. I don't know if anyone knows
• 5:06
  this outside of Australia, but we don't pay a bar tab at the
• 5:10
  end. You can.
• 5:12
  But they don't let. You.
• 5:13
  No, they usually don't if you're in a big party and you give one
• 5:17
  credit card ahead of time. Yeah, you've got a.
• 5:19
  Booking though. You've got a booking, you've got
• 5:21
  a credit card down. Yeah, you don't just waltz in
• 5:23
  off the street. You gotta pay as you go.
• 5:25
  You've gotta give them the money before they hand over the dryer.
• 5:28
  Are you kidding? Especially if you're walking in
• 5:30
  fucking barefoot and thongs. They're so musty, crusty in
• 5:33
  this. Yeah, but anyway, the cover was
• 5:36
  giving. I don't know what to expect,
• 5:38
  because I shouldn't. I should just shut the fuck up
• 5:40
  because we'll get haunting out the line.
• 5:42
  No, to be fair, I really thought it was going to be one of those
• 5:46
  weird barge buildings in the middle of the ocean.
• 5:49
  Yeah, Lucky's lab. I essentially thought they were
• 5:51
  going to be stuck on a lab thing in the middle of the ocean.
• 5:55
  I didn't know anything. I didn't look at the cover very
• 5:58
  well. Oh well, I saw there's a White
• 6:00
  House in the background, so it was giving round the twist.
• 6:02
  Now. Yes.
• 6:05
  Have you ever felt like? This you?
• 6:11
  Like to be fair it? Fits dude, there was some wacky
• 6:17
  Google stuff on that show. This is just the adult version
• 6:20
  of Around The Twist. It.
• 6:24
  Is OK. Let's dive into the story.
• 6:27
  Sawyer, She's a bad, bad gal. She's a bad, bad.
• 6:31
  Bitty. She's a naughty girl.
• 6:35
  I don't know what the fuck she's done because it was very
• 6:37
  unclear, but she's in an airport and someone recognized her and
• 6:40
  then like and then she's like, Oh my God, I better change my
• 6:47
  flight, as if you're getting a flight that day.
• 6:51
  As if you have money as. If you're getting a flight that
• 6:54
  day. Yeah.
• 6:56
  Although she wasn't an International Airport, but she
• 6:59
  had no good. She didn't even have good
• 7:02
  passport and stuff. This isn't 1982 I.
• 7:06
  Didn't know how she ended up where she did because we've got
• 7:08
  like 5 fucking airports and I don't think any of them are near
• 7:12
  there. Where did she fly again?
• 7:14
  She got to Port Valen. I don't know where that is.
• 7:16
  Sydney. Is that what she sort of?
• 7:19
  Is Port Valen even a thing? Is that real I?
• 7:22
  Feel like she made it up. It's.
• 7:24
  Probably Real. She probably Google Maps it.
• 7:27
  It's not even real, Vic. Course it's.
• 7:31
  Victoria. She was probably better off
• 7:34
  ending up in Byron Bay. So yeah, it's like a fake little
• 7:39
  town, small problems, small seaside Township in Australia.
• 7:44
  I hope the people that were consulting her about Australia
• 7:47
  and the Italian language got paid paid.
• 7:50
  Paid paid. I hope they got double paid.
• 7:52
  I was confused because I don't know whether I just
• 7:56
  misinterpreted when Enzo walked in the bar, I swear, she said.
• 8:00
  He had a real thick Australian accent and then he was speaking
• 8:04
  Italian and I was like, who? I think the bartender had the
• 8:08
  Australian accent. Oh well, that makes more sense,
• 8:10
  but I was confused. OK, so she arrives in this
• 8:14
  country she wasn't expecting to be.
• 8:16
  She's just a girly at a bus stop.
• 8:19
  Which rank? Yeah.
• 8:21
  Like, let's talk about Australian bus stops.
• 8:23
  You're getting. Robbed.
• 8:24
  You're getting robbed. And some rando.
• 8:28
  You've got something. Comes up to that.
• 8:31
  And he magically has all the ingredients for a delicious
• 8:35
  stick and poke tattoo. I.
• 8:37
  Don't. Know where this man's getting a
• 8:38
  octopus in from? Giving you hepatitis.
• 8:42
  She. Jumps in the water a bit later
• 8:43
  and she's like, I'm risking getting infection.
• 8:45
  I was like, you got a sticking poke by some random man.
• 8:50
  That's the actual problem at the.
• 8:52
  Bus stop. But you've been infected, he.
• 8:56
  Probably was wearing no shoes. And the best bit is he didn't
• 8:59
  even need to help on the boss. He approached her on purpose
• 9:02
  because she looked sad and alone.
• 9:05
  He's like this fucking teenage girlie.
• 9:07
  She just needs a stick and poke. Before we even approaches her,
• 9:11
  while she's sad and alone to give her a stick and poke of a
• 9:14
  lifetime, she goes through a whole chapter on smoking.
• 9:19
  Yeah, and I nearly quit there. If we weren't reading it for
• 9:22
  this, I would have quit there. I was like like why do I need?
• 9:25
  Because she's a bad, bad gal. She's.
• 9:30
  She's naughty. She's a naughty, naughty girl.
• 9:33
  That's. Why?
• 9:36
  That's why we needed all that background about her being.
• 9:38
  Addicted. To the nicotine, to the.
• 9:40
  Cunt, Sir. Wait, was she vaping?
• 9:42
  No, she was figaretic. That's not very.
• 9:45
  Australian Get on to the vapes, Girly.
• 9:49
  It's 2024. We're vaping.
• 9:53
  Illegally, I laugh with joy. Sounded like I was just sucking
• 10:00
  on a Babe 5. Minutes ago.
• 10:02
  I just want everyone to know that we do in fact have Wi-Fi
• 10:05
  and we do in fact have babes. Welcome to the 21st century.
• 10:11
  I'm sitting in a room without air conditioning.
• 10:15
  I'm dripping. I'm.
• 10:16
  Moist I'm moisture than an oyster in the sand we.
• 10:21
  Only just started it with a moist.
• 10:25
  Wait, we try to convince. People, yeah, come to Australia,
• 10:28
  we've totally got technology and stuff.
• 10:30
  We've got technology, we've got heat, we've got non circling
• 10:35
  Magpies. We've got the ones that just
• 10:38
  straight up looking nice, we've. Yeah.
• 10:39
  We got the crackheads at the bus station.
• 10:42
  Yeah, well, they know about that already, so it's fine.
• 10:44
  You're either meeting a cracker. Wow.
• 10:48
  You're either meeting a crackhead at the bus station or
• 10:51
  there's some guy wanking across the street in this car like
• 10:54
  there's no in between. Yeah.
• 10:56
  Yeah, you're not safe. Both or nothing.
• 10:59
  It's not the place to be. Just catch an Uber.
• 11:02
  It's not. Dude, catch a scooter, Catch a
• 11:06
  Oh yeah, just get on that big ass racist scooter and get out
• 11:09
  of there. Anyway, stick and poke what out
• 11:15
  in the sun. Right.
• 11:17
  The blazing sun bus stop. This is already when I was like
• 11:28
  do I just do not finish now and pretend that I know the rest of
• 11:31
  the book can like see her heart? I'm like gets the downer
• 11:33
  realizing that I. Haven't read it.
• 11:35
  OK. And she doesn't care.
• 11:37
  About those little hepatitis concerns or anything, you know
• 11:40
  why 'cause fucking she's suicidal.
• 11:42
  Anyway. Give me a reason to read this
• 11:45
  book, because she doesn't even have a reason to be alive.
• 11:47
  He was giving. Nothing, you know.
• 11:51
  How she was coming in like I wanna die anyway.
• 11:53
  And I was like, hey girls. Are you OK?
• 11:56
  You OK this reckless behavior? Just going to jail.
• 12:01
  At this point have some class and some.
• 12:04
  Dignity. Oh God.
• 12:08
  Note to self This was me early on when I was writing my notes.
• 12:11
  I can't wait for this book to mismanage mental health
• 12:14
  illnesses. It's.
• 12:16
  Gone. She'll be coming around the
• 12:18
  corner when she comes. I was like the second.
• 12:21
  Now we're just casually throwing in how much she wanted to die.
• 12:24
  I was like this is going to come up badly.
• 12:27
  Later, it's a lack of therapy. It's going to come and it's
• 12:30
  going to crash and burn. Kind of like how haunting
• 12:33
  outline handled stalkers. Can we just talk about Enzo
• 12:37
  walking into a bar being the most gronk meat cute in any book
• 12:40
  this fucking foul? Like what is?
• 12:45
  Going on. She's in this gross spa at.
• 12:48
  This point I already picture her with no teeth, the chemical
• 12:52
  burned hair, no shoes. But he walks in to some Gronk
• 12:57
  pub just dusty. He's got a fucking shaved head.
• 13:04
  And he's just walking in in. Board shorts and and she looks
• 13:07
  over and she's like, frothing. She's like, oh God.
• 13:10
  Turns out he's Italian, though. What guy with that much of an
• 13:14
  accent is living in this little seaside town for no other?
• 13:19
  Places. Do.
• 13:21
  We even have sharks. I mean, we do, but do we even
• 13:25
  have that many sharks? For him to be working as like a
• 13:28
  what was he a? Shark.
• 13:30
  Like a researcher. He had a lab under the ocean.
• 13:34
  He You're telling me he's rich? You're telling me he's a
• 13:36
  scientist who just walks around in board shorts waiting to pick
• 13:39
  up Ren and? Ren's on the bus?
• 13:42
  Absolutely not. Absolutely.
• 13:43
  Not. Absolutely not.
• 13:45
  Have some class just. The idea that he's just
• 13:51
  operating in. Cabins in Australia?
• 13:54
  Exactly where are you? He has Victoria cold all the
• 13:59
  time. Nobody's walking around there
• 14:02
  and bathing so. Why is a scientist just
• 14:04
  wandering around picking up wet chicks?
• 14:06
  Why are you not researching? Where's your life's work,
• 14:09
  exactly? Feral.
• 14:11
  Can we talk about Enzo and his love of the ocean?
• 14:15
  Yeah, we can't. Because it gave me the egg.
• 14:18
  Like them really weird kids that are obsessed with Penguins and
• 14:23
  they dress up like a Penguin, they pretend to be a Penguin,
• 14:28
  they carry an egg, something like that.
• 14:30
  Like at this point I thought he was going to fuck sharks.
• 14:34
  Didn't that happen in real life? What?
• 14:36
  There was that guy that was his zookeeper or something and turns
• 14:38
  out he was molesting all the animals in Australia.
• 14:41
  It wasn't shark. So he probably would have tried,
• 14:44
  but he was literally like crocodiles.
• 14:47
  Yeah. So that's not that different
• 14:48
  from a shark. Yeah.
• 14:50
  It's giving whoever that guy is. That's what I mean every two
• 14:54
  seconds. Like.
• 14:55
  What do you mean? I can't.
• 14:57
  I conquered your ocean. I've had enough.
• 14:59
  Oh. Can we talk about how he was
• 15:01
  described physically? Yeah, I know I mentioned the
• 15:04
  bald head, but. I know this.
• 15:05
  That's the most important part. I just want you to know that I
• 15:08
  was dying every two minutes. This is his description.
• 15:12
  OK, just just get ready to froth.
• 15:14
  Yeah. OK, get ready to froth.
• 15:16
  Hold on to your knickers. It's about to be.
• 15:17
  They're about to be blown off. I'm.
• 15:19
  Frothing out the mouth but in like like.
• 15:22
  A Rabies. Yes.
• 15:25
  OK. Here's the physical description.
• 15:27
  He's wearing board shorts and a black tank top.
• 15:30
  Not a. Cancelled already.
• 15:32
  His hair is buzzed close to the scalp.
• 15:35
  Short little spikes that would probably feel incredible against
• 15:38
  my hands. Hazel eyes with a dark splotch
• 15:42
  on the right one and deeply tanned skin.
• 15:45
  A light dusting of hair is scattered across his sharp
• 15:48
  jawline, accentuating the near criminal look he's got going on.
• 15:58
  You know them board. Shorts.
• 15:59
  You know, them board shorts had the like a naked woman.
• 16:02
  Yeah, the unit spikes. OK, Bart Simpson.
• 16:06
  OK, what? Is going on.
• 16:08
  There. It's not giving presidents, no
• 16:12
  I. Thought Italian guys are
• 16:13
  supposed to have nice. Hair like 4 arms flick.
• 16:16
  Hairline unlock. Slick back.
• 16:19
  Why is he shaving it closer to this gal?
• 16:22
  He's never had a woman in his life.
• 16:24
  Dark splotch in his eye. How are you seeing that in the
• 16:26
  dark, dusty, crusty pub? Unless it's huge.
• 16:32
  He's got a full cataract. He's got a David Bowie situation
• 16:35
  because he's being socked in the face, probably.
• 16:38
  But what is a near criminal? Look?
• 16:40
  It's giving full criminal what is near.
• 16:46
  Criminal. Bogan and she's giving Hick.
• 16:52
  They should have renamed this the bogan and the Hick.
• 16:54
  Sometimes she spoke to him and I was like, you're a fool Hick.
• 16:58
  Oh, you know what it's giving though.
• 16:59
  This is what I thought it was giving divorced Dad that dresses
• 17:02
  like a 12 year old boy stuck in the 2000 the black tank top and
• 17:06
  then the board. Unit.
• 17:08
  Not the wife. Beater, the wife, beater, the
• 17:11
  board shorts, the thongs. Is it like the the proper wife
• 17:15
  beater or is it the undershirt bond?
• 17:18
  The. Undershirt.
• 17:21
  It's a black undershirt. You'd have to be ripped to pull
• 17:24
  that off and then it's giving Vin Diesel.
• 17:27
  This ain't about family. Fucking Jesus.
• 17:32
  I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
• 17:34
  It was already going downhill. Look, at least if you weren't
• 17:37
  going to read this book, we've highlighted all the important
• 17:39
  stuff that you need to know. OK, they wonder.
• 17:42
  They have this really stupid conversation.
• 17:44
  They try to do a time skip so it looks like they're getting deep
• 17:47
  and meaningful. It was bullshit.
• 17:49
  Yeah, Nothing I hate more than crap dialogue.
• 17:53
  Yeah, when they're supposed to be having a big combos going.
• 17:56
  On about you're trying to knock me up and I was like.
• 17:59
  Girl. Girl, you literally look like
• 18:02
  you smell at. This point he wouldn't touch you
• 18:06
  with a 10 foot dildo. He's like, I would not fuck you.
• 18:14
  It was a lie, but. Still cut to 5 minutes later.
• 18:18
  Oh. The fact that they just walk out
• 18:20
  of this pub, you know she has nothing on it.
• 18:22
  She's walking out in little Jean shorts and like a no wallet.
• 18:25
  Yup. No.
• 18:27
  Phone. No phone.
• 18:29
  Some infected Crusty Sticky Milk.
• 18:34
  It's red and. Inflamed and they.
• 18:37
  Just this is like. Noon midday.
• 18:42
  And they're just walking down and they're like, yeah, let's
• 18:43
  fuck, huh? They just.
• 18:47
  Walk Do not have things to do, Do not have sharks to research
• 18:51
  this. Is like top o'clock on a Tuesday
• 18:55
  like light? What do you do?
• 18:59
  I feel like she thinks she's getting money out of him.
• 19:02
  She's just. That's all she was did.
• 19:03
  John Yeah, but she thinks she's actually like.
• 19:10
  She is telling me she. Looked at this buzz cut.
• 19:13
  These cheap ass board shorts with the unit woman on them, The
• 19:17
  bond $10 wife. Because she was.
• 19:20
  Like. I'm getting money.
• 19:23
  She was. I'm eating good tonight.
• 19:26
  She. Was like, this is the hottest
• 19:29
  man I've seen in my life. Oh my God.
• 19:37
  Can with. No shoes.
• 19:38
  Crusty there's skin. Flakes falling off.
• 19:42
  You know what though? Dead ass.
• 19:43
  Anybody that is Italian and your name is or similar to Enzo
• 19:48
  Diesel, Diego, or any variation of these should immediately
• 19:51
  receive compensation from any smart book writer.
• 19:56
  Because, excuse me, why is it always men with these names?
• 20:01
  What happened to just like a John?
• 20:04
  John What happened to John Smith?
• 20:07
  A nice respectable name. Respectful man.
• 20:11
  He's poor, poor Italian men. Misrepresented, not.
• 20:16
  Even with the buzz cut and all. They're just going to some
• 20:19
  different locations, so he's. Just taking.
• 20:22
  He's literally just walking her to some random hole that he
• 20:25
  dives into just so. That.
• 20:27
  They can fuck free like he's not booking a hotel motel room.
• 20:33
  But she doesn't even know that's happening.
• 20:35
  She could be getting murdered. Yeah, she doesn't care.
• 20:38
  She wants to die, remember? It all trickles back down to her
• 20:41
  not wanting to live. Immediately they're in this
• 20:44
  crusty, dusty waterfall. They're talking.
• 20:47
  And then? He licks her.
• 20:49
  Tears and I don't know what's going on.
• 20:53
  Why is this a trope? Is that before or after?
• 20:57
  She's like, I think you could just ruin me with the tip.
• 21:00
  And he's like, you think I would've even have a go, sis?
• 21:05
  It's around that time. Look, there was a lot of
• 21:07
  ridiculous. There was a lot of things going
• 21:09
  on. That trope only worked some
• 21:12
  weird fantasy books, and even then it's pushing it.
• 21:15
  I don't want. Anyone licking my face?
• 21:17
  So why? Is.
• 21:17
  Everybody crying they meant 5 minutes ago, like stop being
• 21:21
  vulnerable with complete strangers.
• 21:23
  She I think she was. Getting choked.
• 21:26
  Oh, was this already during the sex?
• 21:28
  I don't even know. I don't even know what I was.
• 21:29
  Playing blanked all of that Out it was.
• 21:32
  Wow. What is going on?
• 21:35
  She's having, they're having sex on a rock, like the water isn't
• 21:39
  filled with all the bacteria in the world and.
• 21:42
  With her fresh. Wound.
• 21:44
  Yeah, and there's conveniently a beautiful waterfall just in the
• 21:48
  background. Just in walking distance from
• 21:51
  the pub, acting like they didn't walk 45 minutes.
• 21:55
  So I think before they even bone, right?
• 21:57
  This is how she talks about this moment in time, deciding to go
• 22:01
  for it. I do a running jump, curl into a
• 22:03
  ball and slam into the water like a true imbecile.
• 22:06
  Most girls would probably sachet into the water like they're in a
• 22:10
  photo shoot, but my life is too uncertain not to do the things I
• 22:14
  truly want to do, like seduce the hottest man I've ever seen
• 22:18
  behind a waterfall. Are you kidding?
• 22:20
  What the fuck if I was be OK if I was behind the waterfall and
• 22:24
  this bitch cannonballed in? I'd get the egg.
• 22:29
  But she's not like other girls, Emily.
• 22:31
  She's different. Her life is too.
• 22:33
  She's a naughty, naughty gal. But it's too insecure for her to
• 22:37
  just walk into the water. OK, sorry.
• 22:40
  Does she think everybody is a supermodel?
• 22:43
  What is going on? Does she think everyone's like
• 22:45
  Margot robbieing into the water at all times?
• 22:48
  Oh yeah, Margot Robbie is not even Margot Robbie into the
• 22:51
  water. Exactly.
• 22:52
  She thinks we're just all Sydney sweening into the water.
• 22:55
  Excuse me, I don't understand. And also seduce.
• 23:01
  Like it's difficult. He's whipping his Dick out in
• 23:04
  public. Babe, you did not seduce.
• 23:08
  Him. She's like, huh?
• 23:10
  I just kept telling him that he could get me pregnant and now
• 23:12
  I'm seducing him. He decided to stick his Dick in
• 23:16
  big fucking whoop. He probably would have stuck his
• 23:19
  hot his. Hole he probably.
• 23:23
  Would have stuck his Dick into a hole in the Rockwall near the
• 23:26
  waterfall if it wasn't you that he had.
• 23:28
  A with a shark. Just glistening by that.
• 23:32
  Actually sounds nicer than this sex scene.
• 23:35
  There's so much going on, I'm sorry my thoughts cannot I?
• 23:38
  Know it's. Very hard.
• 23:40
  While she's being weirdly needy and like you're going to ruin me
• 23:44
  with your massive penile. She's like.
• 23:49
  You need to kiss me first because I'm sick of men not
• 23:53
  being able to kiss me. Of course Enzo does not, in
• 23:57
  fact, kiss women. It's too hard.
• 23:59
  He hates women. It's too hard.
• 24:02
  He's got. Mummy issues.
• 24:04
  The dark. Lady, he's just as his.
• 24:07
  Mummy. She left him on the steps of a
• 24:10
  church. Good riddance.
• 24:12
  Good. Riddance, I hope.
• 24:14
  She's living her best life. What a queen.
• 24:16
  What? A.
• 24:17
  Childless Queen. Look at how he turned out.
• 24:24
  I don't think there was any fixing that.
• 24:27
  She made a joke about him being able to ruin her life with just
• 24:30
  the tip, you know, obviously. And lo and behold, somehow he
• 24:33
  drags up literally the Loch Ness Monster, his Dick out of the
• 24:36
  water, and he's just ready to go.
• 24:38
  Like Dick just out. The Dick is halfway across the
• 24:43
  waterfall. Exactly, I don't.
• 24:47
  Know. How?
• 24:49
  I just don't know how she didn't notice the three legs.
• 24:52
  Walking down in the Bush, what I like is that this time is the
• 24:57
  only time I could be like, Yep, that Dick's too big.
• 24:59
  You know, that's always that trope of the Dick's way too big.
• 25:04
  It's always too big. Sit.
• 25:05
  Out. It is.
• 25:06
  A third leg. It's touching the ground.
• 25:08
  It's got scrape marks from the rocks.
• 25:10
  It's actually. It's the same way as his entire
• 25:14
  body, you tell. Me.
• 25:15
  He's a nearly criminal man. The biggest?
• 25:19
  Thing. Oh my God.
• 25:21
  Get this though. They're about his Duke, his
• 25:23
  poise to go in. I can't remember what position
• 25:25
  or anything. It's all wiped from my brain.
• 25:27
  I know she was on her back. Onto the rocks, of course.
• 25:30
  Of course, get this. This near criminal always wears
• 25:35
  condoms. But.
• 25:37
  Maybe just this? Box.
• 25:39
  I won't. Shut.
• 25:40
  Up. I would the crustiest bitch you
• 25:43
  could find before Valon. Who is literally infected with
• 25:48
  hepatitis. It's coursing through her
• 25:50
  fucking face from her fresh, stinking poke.
• 25:53
  He's like, you know who's the person to roll the dice on this
• 25:57
  crusty bitch? Yup.
• 25:59
  Are you believing that for a second?
• 26:03
  Musty. No, But are you believing that
• 26:05
  he uses a condom without? Free oven.
• 26:07
  I don't believe women sleep with him.
• 26:11
  So in a way, he is clean. Either that or he's Dick so big
• 26:17
  because it's practically falling off from the.
• 26:20
  Infestation. I'm just.
• 26:23
  Just. Pussy.
• 26:24
  This is why men just have to close their.
• 26:26
  Legs and be more respectable. Tuck it in.
• 26:31
  Dare him disgusting into this pub with his massive penis.
• 26:35
  No woman's going to want you. If you're just out here with a
• 26:38
  mess, Tuck it in. You.
• 26:40
  Harlot, Put your Dick away, Tuck it into your.
• 26:46
  Asses. Responsible, Respectful.
• 26:47
  Establishment. The waterfall.
• 26:55
  Demands respect. You must pay the spirits in your
• 27:02
  car. And.
• 27:03
  Then. Just shark spirit animals.
• 27:05
  Just like. The earth is pregnant From how?
• 27:12
  This watering hole is just Mother Nature's Earth vagina.
• 27:15
  And he's. Pregnant with it?
• 27:17
  It's. So.
• 27:18
  Salty in that waterfall because these balls are so big.
• 27:21
  We've never. Fully lost it.
• 27:23
  As bad as like right now it's only chapter 3 so stuck it
• 27:29
  hurts. Oh my God.
• 27:31
  And you know what? I just answered the question.
• 27:33
  It does fucking hurt. This book hurts.
• 27:36
  It does. Not as Dick I.
• 27:38
  Was asked at least five times during this book, and every time
• 27:41
  I said yes, I was. I willingly downloaded, but I
• 27:47
  didn't consent. That's when the non con comes
• 27:51
  in, so they obviously go back to his place in bone indefinitely.
• 27:57
  He says some weird Predator shit about how we're chapter four.
• 28:03
  We moved on from chapter. 3. He goes.
• 28:07
  No, Bella, I'm going to make you take it from me.
• 28:09
  If you want a predator to submit you to you, then you need to
• 28:14
  submit to you. Then you need to be stronger.
• 28:17
  Mitt, you're not a predator. She caught you?
• 28:21
  Who's the predator? Who's old?
• 28:24
  Is this an age? Gap.
• 28:25
  No, no, no, Big Eagles. She steals some important shit
• 28:33
  so that she can make a credit card in his name, which.
• 28:35
  She does immediately. Somehow Isn't the credit card
• 28:40
  situation never lined up with Australians.
• 28:43
  She stole his Italian Social Security number.
• 28:47
  We don't have security, social numbers and.
• 28:50
  How are you going to just take a screenshot?
• 28:51
  That shit needs to be signed off.
• 28:54
  You need the. You need the birth certificate.
• 28:57
  You need a justice of the peace to be there and sign in front of
• 29:00
  you, girl. Please.
• 29:02
  Girl Australia was not the place to.
• 29:04
  Pick unless she did some fraudulent stuff, because that's
• 29:07
  kind of her crimes. Yeah, I don't know.
• 29:09
  I just feel like it would be a lot harder.
• 29:12
  So she steals some shit. She doesn't even leave the town.
• 29:16
  Just go one town over. At least there's plenty of them.
• 29:21
  I guess because it's supposed to be a small beach town.
• 29:24
  But when I was reading this, I didn't get that from the start
• 29:26
  and I was like, how did he just run into her at the beach?
• 29:30
  There's five people in this. Fucking for.
• 29:32
  Real. There's no way.
• 29:34
  He's like, I'm just going to check the beach first, you know?
• 29:37
  It runs into her it. Just runs into her.
• 29:39
  And this is a couple days later, isn't it?
• 29:41
  And she ghosted him and he was 8 like.
• 29:44
  Two weeks. It was in a couple of weeks.
• 29:46
  She had already racked up like $1000.
• 29:48
  Yeah. And he figured it out, Yeah,
• 29:50
  because he was like, oh shit. She she had taken.
• 29:53
  She's just disappeared. He was trying to get that
• 29:55
  Friends With Benefits started and for whatever reason she just
• 29:58
  plays nice with him, even though they kind of agreed that it was
• 30:03
  going to be a one night stand. Just stick by your word, bitch.
• 30:06
  Also, he could be luring you into a trap because he could
• 30:09
  know about it and she's still that numb and goes with him.
• 30:13
  She's just so stupid it hurts. I'm just victim blaming at this
• 30:17
  point. Is she a victim?
• 30:20
  For what happens next, Kind of. Yeah.
• 30:23
  Oh yeah. He takes her out in the middle
• 30:25
  of nowhere on his boat and then. He just.
• 30:29
  Bangs her while drowning her in shark infested waters after he's
• 30:34
  riled up all the sharks. Yeah, so this is where I'm like,
• 30:38
  it is full of salt because there's a point where she's
• 30:41
  like, trying to get him to stop. And he doesn't.
• 30:45
  He just keeps going and he's OK with it.
• 30:47
  He's OK with it. We, as the audience, are
• 30:50
  supposed to be OK with it. She's nearly.
• 30:53
  Drowning. Bites.
• 30:54
  Her lips so hard and at that point I feel like she definitely
• 30:58
  took that consent back. And he's just like shoving her
• 31:02
  face in the water. So all the blood's just.
• 31:04
  Yeah. Gone.
• 31:05
  There's no way he is that quick. No.
• 31:08
  What do you even do from there? Because she's just like, cool.
• 31:11
  What the fuck? They're.
• 31:13
  Finishing up. I don't know how long they were
• 31:15
  having sex, but conveniently, they're just looking over.
• 31:17
  Oh, there's a crazy storm that's just coming out of nowhere.
• 31:21
  Yeah, she's having like a like a quick little mental breakdown.
• 31:24
  This is probably where he looks at tears, because he looks at
• 31:27
  tears and goes. They're mine now.
• 31:29
  Well. He did it before as well though,
• 31:31
  I think. Stop it when the storm comes
• 31:34
  over and he's like, aye, the person that's always in the
• 31:37
  ocean always checks every day the weather.
• 31:39
  Conveniently didn't check the weather this day.
• 31:42
  And then she was having a little bit of a laugh because she goes,
• 31:46
  you brought me out here to make me think I'm going to die, and
• 31:49
  now they're going to both die. Yep.
• 31:52
  How big is this storm? How small is this?
• 31:54
  How? How far in the ocean are they?
• 31:57
  That's what, yeah, because that would have taken a long time to
• 32:00
  get out there. I'd be like, he's definitely
• 32:02
  going to kill me. Yeah, 100%.
• 32:04
  As soon as sharks were around the boat I would have been like,
• 32:08
  I am going to die. And how did he even convince her
• 32:10
  to hop on the boat alone to go out in the middle of nowhere?
• 32:13
  Yeah, it it wasn't really explained very well.
• 32:16
  She's not the smartest cookie in the cookie, yeah.
• 32:18
  The storm capsizes them, obviously, because they're in a
• 32:21
  tiny bucket boat. I don't understand how he does
• 32:25
  all that shit and then he's like, Oh no, you better hold
• 32:28
  your breath, baby. I know.
• 32:30
  He starts calling her pet names. Yeah, I'm like, you literally
• 32:33
  were just trying to kill her. And then they get thrown onto
• 32:36
  this island somehow, but she's freaking out that he's dead too.
• 32:38
  She's like, Oh my. God.
• 32:40
  She actually saved him. She swam him to shore.
• 32:44
  I wouldn't. I wouldn't either.
• 32:46
  The fuck Life would have been better when?
• 32:48
  He just tried to drown. You.
• 32:50
  I know I'd be like, that's calm, a bitch.
• 32:52
  Hopefully you get in by now. I'd see he's like floating body
• 32:56
  out there and I'd be like, oh, going out there.
• 32:59
  It's too. Far I can barely swim as it is.
• 33:03
  They figure they're on this crazy island, right?
• 33:05
  Yes, they come to terms with that.
• 33:07
  Where the fuck are? They that it's that secluded.
• 33:10
  And apparently they're so far away from Australia.
• 33:12
  How long were you in the water? That's what I don't.
• 33:15
  Understand. How far did you go without
• 33:17
  getting attacked or drowned? Yup.
• 33:20
  There is no reception. Not the Titanic.
• 33:23
  And they were in a small boat. They're not going that far into
• 33:25
  the deep ocean. It would take multiple hours.
• 33:29
  Yeah. Come on, what is going on?
• 33:32
  What is? Happening.
• 33:33
  But anyway, unrealisticness aside, they run into a complete
• 33:37
  creeper that lives there. Sylvester.
• 33:41
  And then he locks him in a bedroom.
• 33:44
  He allows him to stay, locks him in a bedroom with a piss.
• 33:46
  Bucket, if I'm being honest, if I was ever in a situation, this
• 33:53
  one in particular, and some random man on a random island,
• 33:59
  there was no one else around and he locked me in a room with a
• 34:02
  piss. Bucket, I'd kill him.
• 34:05
  Yeah. I'd be like.
• 34:07
  I'd be like absolutely not. He's not, no.
• 34:11
  What would we do if we both got locked in with the piss bucket
• 34:14
  in this dank, moldy ass room? You and I both know I have the
• 34:19
  bladder of a small. Child, I'd be like you just stay
• 34:22
  on the piss bucket. I'll let you know when I need
• 34:24
  it. I'd just be out in the morning.
• 34:27
  I'd. Be probably so dehydrated that
• 34:29
  it wouldn't. Even matter.
• 34:30
  Is he giving us water? Like, what's happening?
• 34:32
  Is this some weird piss fetish? Like, what is going on?
• 34:35
  And so I assume they've only got 1 bed of course, so there's that
• 34:39
  lovely trope of 1 bed. One bed How?
• 34:41
  Is this enemies to lovers when they fucked?
• 34:44
  In the first instance, it's not giving enemies to lovers.
• 34:47
  No, and it's clearly he's in love with her from, like, day
• 34:50
  one. Why?
• 34:53
  I just. Want a good?
• 34:54
  Enemies to lovers. That makes me feel all the
• 34:58
  enemies to love things. Who's feeling what reading this
• 35:02
  because I was feeling confused. I was feeling conflicted.
• 35:06
  Confused and bored. My vagina was slowly sewing
• 35:10
  itself. It was knitting itself.
• 35:13
  It was. Slowly drying out.
• 35:17
  He was. Calling the doctors you.
• 35:18
  Know we were just like a little piece of beef.
• 35:21
  Jerky. Just slowly, yeah.
• 35:24
  I just don't know who's reading this for fun because I just felt
• 35:28
  like I know people like Dale, Croman says.
• 35:29
  I know that Don't come for me. I know that.
• 35:32
  You know what I mean? Yeah, don't come for me.
• 35:34
  I know people like this stuff, but what are you getting out of
• 35:37
  it because? I don't like some dark romances.
• 35:40
  Sometimes they keep them interesting.
• 35:42
  The only thing that kept me reading this book was trying to
• 35:45
  work out who was locked upstairs.
• 35:49
  Well, I just thought it was wanting out of line in just a
• 35:51
  ghost. Because they kept.
• 35:53
  Was it even a ghost? No, it was the girl.
• 35:55
  Yeah, but in the book it was giving pen pal like you said how
• 36:00
  just random shit's going on and you're just like.
• 36:02
  I'm confused. I didn't care though.
• 36:04
  I was like, at least that's something that we'll learn
• 36:09
  later. It gave me a weird comfort.
• 36:12
  But that's the only thing that kept me reading because I didn't
• 36:15
  care about anything else. True.
• 36:18
  She smells like the ocean. And then he gets mad because
• 36:21
  that's his favorite scent. So she smells like pure salt.
• 36:25
  Yeah, and sweat. And he's but he's mad at her
• 36:28
  about it. How does old mate have a wooden
• 36:30
  peg leg but practically sprints down the hallway when they were
• 36:34
  snooping that time and they were hiding in the closet?
• 36:37
  How does he do anything? I don't want to.
• 36:41
  I have so many questions about the end of the book, so I'll
• 36:43
  just leave it to the end of the book.
• 36:45
  Yeah, There's so many. Sylvester.
• 36:48
  Is he short? Is he tall?
• 36:50
  His peg legs too short, I know that.
• 36:52
  He was giving me average height. I don't even know.
• 36:55
  So they're snooping because they're in the closet.
• 36:56
  They're trying to find out information about and then after
• 36:59
  that Sprint down the. Hallway.
• 37:01
  He just whips his leg off and has a nap.
• 37:03
  I'm sorry, who sprints to have a nap?
• 37:06
  Why would you get your adrenaline all pumping right
• 37:08
  before you're about to go? Maybe he's just.
• 37:10
  Happy breathing up the. Stairs.
• 37:12
  He wasn't really springing the. Real.
• 37:15
  Question is. We thought it was a good idea to
• 37:17
  finger her in the closet. Enzo, but she wasn't even being
• 37:22
  quiet about it. He was full finger blasting at
• 37:25
  full speed. I.
• 37:26
  Don't know who finds this man attractive besides the weird
• 37:30
  description he has, but he says shit like your pussy singing a
• 37:35
  lullaby. Are you kidding?
• 37:36
  I would throw myself out of the lighthouse if someone said that
• 37:40
  to me. Yeah, what does that even mean?
• 37:42
  I'll. All mates asleep right in front
• 37:45
  of you guys. He's not that decrepit.
• 37:48
  How old is this man? He's been there since before 85.
• 37:53
  Anyway, he says in that exact moment.
• 37:55
  And this is what also would be making me question all my life
• 37:58
  decisions, he says. Would you scream for me this
• 38:01
  time? But, he goes, you always do when
• 38:03
  you create your own little ocean all over me.
• 38:05
  Stop it. The ocean.
• 38:07
  Get over it, get. Over the sea.
• 38:09
  He's obsessed. He's.
• 38:11
  Obsessed. And it's gross.
• 38:13
  His mistress is the sea. It is because immediately after
• 38:16
  he goes, I've already conquered your ocean.
• 38:19
  OK. You're panicking so much and
• 38:25
  it's kind of like. Every time I read it, I was
• 38:27
  like. How?
• 38:28
  Do you? Face your ocean.
• 38:38
  It's like. Oh.
• 38:41
  Jesus, do you think he puts his ear up to her vagina and waits
• 38:44
  for those ocean wave noises? He's like.
• 38:51
  I'm rubbing that sweet little shell.
• 38:54
  Not the clam. Clam.
• 38:58
  So he's he's talking clam makes these sweet nothings just like.
• 39:06
  I can't. Remember what he was.
• 39:07
  Saying whilst they were blasting.
• 39:09
  She didn't. Consent to that, either.
• 39:11
  He just crept his little fingers into her pants.
• 39:15
  But he did it while she was having a panic attack.
• 39:18
  Yeah, like that's going to help. You're panicking about being
• 39:21
  stuck in a closet and this creepy old man finding you.
• 39:24
  And you know what you do? You put your fingers in the
• 39:26
  cookie jar. You.
• 39:28
  Straight up. Put them Yup.
• 39:30
  OK, help me help me help you because I.
• 39:33
  I cannot be helped. I wrote something.
• 39:35
  Down and I need assistance. I need assistance.
• 39:40
  I need a dog. I need the.
• 39:43
  I need the ward police. OK, this is what I wrote down.
• 39:47
  I don't know what this means. Not him finding The Cave.
• 39:51
  I'm assuming that means Enzo and making her pull out her pussy
• 39:55
  slime. And I feel like this is way
• 40:01
  later because my consistency with notes just went really
• 40:04
  downhill. But he literally made.
• 40:07
  Her. Scoop up her pussy slime at one
• 40:09
  point. I.
• 40:12
  Know. OK, I was.
• 40:13
  Too stressed from everything else I know, they fucked in The
• 40:16
  Cave. Yeah.
• 40:17
  But after he was like, how dare you hide this cave from me?
• 40:20
  Let her have her cave. Fucking cave.
• 40:25
  It's all she has. Well, maybe.
• 40:28
  It's this is probably around the time where he was telling her to
• 40:30
  close her mouth because she kept looking at the glow worms with
• 40:33
  her mouth over. Let her look.
• 40:35
  She. Has.
• 40:37
  And I don't even like. A bit tasty little slimy tree.
• 40:40
  I don't even like. Sawyer.
• 40:42
  But it's all she has, apart from Okay.
• 40:44
  Apart from this weird cave bullshit and that.
• 40:46
  They're. Living with Sylvester, they've
• 40:49
  just sort of agreed with his, I suppose, rules.
• 40:52
  As in, we sleep in this room. Down the stairs.
• 40:57
  I'll take his pig leg. And hit him with it.
• 41:02
  It's not that hard, you're telling me, two grown fit
• 41:05
  adults. Cannot.
• 41:06
  Whack this man. That's.
• 41:09
  Why I don't understand about the.
• 41:10
  End of the book. Oh, don't care me.
• 41:12
  Stop. I would have.
• 41:14
  Whacked him day two. I'd have been like, come on now.
• 41:17
  Like, look at you. Look at me.
• 41:18
  We've got this. It's fine.
• 41:20
  He could have just whipped his Dick out and done a little and
• 41:23
  it's over for him. Sylvester's over ROP.
• 41:34
  She could just scoop out a bit of pussy.
• 41:35
  Simon. He's done.
• 41:39
  Sylvester's so festy he would probably chase it.
• 41:42
  He would chase it. He would.
• 41:44
  Lick that glob off the wall. Disgusting.
• 41:50
  OK, so Sylvester has this weird fetish about her, too, because
• 41:54
  he's always a bit. Surprised, though it's a lonely
• 41:59
  man on an island. He's constantly touching her.
• 42:03
  But they emphasized a lot about her blonde hair.
• 42:06
  Yeah. And remember, they talked about
• 42:08
  his family at one point, and they were blonde.
• 42:10
  And I was like, oh. That's a.
• 42:11
  Problem. That's a connection.
• 42:15
  Right, yeah. Anyway they agree with.
• 42:18
  Why? I don't know why they agree
• 42:20
  they're OK with Sylvester putting these rations on them
• 42:23
  because cargo ships only come once a month, and they come with
• 42:26
  his groceries from clicking clay coals.
• 42:30
  Like. Buying the groceries here?
• 42:34
  I just want. To okay while he's doing this
• 42:38
  too, there's a bit where she catches 3 fish with a spear.
• 42:42
  Apparently, catching fish is too against Enzos morals with the
• 42:47
  sea. Shut up.
• 42:49
  I know. He's like, I'm just no good at
• 42:51
  catching fish because I've never eaten fish before because I just
• 42:55
  love the ecosystem. So she catches 3 fish and then
• 43:00
  Sylvester, it's like you can have some steak tonight.
• 43:04
  Not the fucking. When she care too much about the
• 43:07
  sea life. Wouldn't she have fish one day,
• 43:10
  ration for dinner and then have steak the next day?
• 43:14
  Why would? You have.
• 43:15
  It's like, cool, let's just waste rations When we had fish
• 43:19
  perfectly ready to eat. Yeah, and then they never catch
• 43:22
  fish again. She's so smart.
• 43:24
  She makes her own spear, but that's it.
• 43:26
  I ain't nobody fishing anymore. We're.
• 43:28
  Done. Because, Enzo said, stop.
• 43:31
  What kind of ecosystem can't afford people hand fishing
• 43:35
  through Fisher Day? Like, I'm sorry, that's the
• 43:37
  ecosystem's fault? Are you kidding?
• 43:41
  I'm. I mean.
• 43:41
  I can get fat. I'm like care.
• 43:43
  About it when you get back, you've done enough, Sir.
• 43:46
  Literally. Focus on the ozone layer in
• 43:49
  Australia and then fix your problem.
• 43:51
  But don't you think the fact that they're out here in the
• 43:53
  wilderness, their carbon footprint has dramatically
• 43:56
  decreased? You're not driving a car, yeah.
• 43:58
  You're. Good, you're good.
• 44:00
  So eat all the fish you want, bro.
• 44:02
  Senile Susie is not ruining the planet right now.
• 44:05
  Exactly. After all of this weird all.
• 44:09
  Of what? What's going on is like
• 44:11
  castaway. We're nowhere.
• 44:13
  Near the end. This is castaway and you can't
• 44:16
  tell me otherwise. Sylvester gets his greedy little
• 44:19
  hands on that, so he's already touching it and bitches
• 44:23
  conflicted because Ento's like, don't touch her.
• 44:26
  I would be OK bash the man already at this point.
• 44:29
  I know. But Sylvester comes up to say
• 44:31
  sorry to her. And it's like.
• 44:33
  You don't expect me to help it while you're like in a bikini.
• 44:37
  Why she has a? Choice.
• 44:39
  It's all she has. Where's the shopping center?
• 44:41
  She's going to go buy the clothes to turn you away.
• 44:44
  Yeah, like, can I pop down to the Myers real quick and I'll
• 44:47
  get a different bikini? But you know the worst part?
• 44:51
  By the end of the book, if I fucking had to hear about these
• 44:53
  crusty bikini bottoms one more time, I was about.
• 44:56
  To fucking lose it. I know.
• 44:58
  The. Crusty bikini bottoms, the
• 45:00
  amount of times he took them off slid them to the side.
• 45:03
  They are crusted up so. They are falling apart, they are
• 45:07
  disintegrated. Got them from Big W, but they're
• 45:10
  not quality. No, they're no longer fluorid
• 45:13
  green. They're.
• 45:15
  Olive. No, I just couldn't hear about
• 45:19
  it. And you know, bikinis are not
• 45:21
  something you should be wearing 24/7.
• 45:23
  So she's got crotch swamp, There's no.
• 45:27
  Breathability got stuck on this island.
• 45:29
  She's like in a beach town. You just wear them.
• 45:32
  No, you. Don't.
• 45:33
  You do not. The coochie needs to breathe.
• 45:35
  No one works. You're not at the.
• 45:36
  Ocean Farm Oh my God, the amount of times.
• 45:41
  In this book. That.
• 45:42
  He mentioned her vagina smelling.
• 45:46
  A vulva. I've got a direct quote
• 45:49
  somewhere. So he said this and I quote, but
• 45:52
  I can still smell her sweet cunt and how it weeps for me.
• 45:56
  Stop with the weeping death. Immediately.
• 45:59
  Death. Every single time.
• 46:02
  Immediately. Every single minute of the time
• 46:05
  she's like, if I just leaned a little forward, I'd be able to
• 46:08
  smell it. I can smell her around.
• 46:11
  So is she obvious, lady? Is it just that musty?
• 46:16
  I It's those bikini bones. That's all it could be.
• 46:19
  It's entrapping the moisture. There's no aeration.
• 46:22
  There is mold at this. Point There's mold, there's
• 46:25
  black mold there's. Black plague.
• 46:27
  There's hepatitis. There's.
• 46:28
  A lot going on. It's just a casual yeasty on a
• 46:31
  Thursday morning. She's got the BV.
• 46:34
  She's got the BV. From his dirty D.
• 46:39
  I just OK. There was a point where Suya
• 46:40
  said coitus. And I just just.
• 46:43
  I'm done. Honestly, the amount of shit she
• 46:46
  said that I wish was not, said cyborgs.
• 46:50
  Water police, Yeah, the one point Sylvester's like, did she
• 46:54
  hit her head? And Enzo's like, Nah, that's
• 46:56
  just her. She's just the weird.
• 46:59
  Bitch. Honestly, when I saw the word
• 47:02
  coitus, I just it takes me to Big Bang Theory and Sheldon
• 47:06
  Cooper and I just. Congress.
• 47:08
  If I was reading this for fucking fun, I'm.
• 47:13
  Out No. That's what I mean.
• 47:14
  If I was reading it for fun, I would have been out on the
• 47:16
  chapter on the smoking. I wouldn't.
• 47:18
  Even be out the second the stick and poke thing, 'cause that was
• 47:20
  the first time I texted you and I was like, like, I don't.
• 47:23
  Know. I don't know.
• 47:25
  We've only vetoed one book ever, and I don't like to veto books.
• 47:29
  I like to just power through and struggle through the pain.
• 47:33
  I'll tell you, I'll remember this one.
• 47:35
  So can I just note that I don't know what's worse?
• 47:39
  Enzo's starting to treat her better because she told him that
• 47:42
  her brother sexually abused her as a child, or him continuing to
• 47:47
  treat her like shit after learning that.
• 47:50
  I don't know what's worse, it's just protect.
• 47:53
  It didn't change. Anything, though.
• 47:55
  Here's the thing. He had sex with her for some
• 48:00
  unknown reason. I don't know why.
• 48:01
  We haven't talked about it yet. She squirts every time she's the
• 48:05
  ocean. Yeah, OK.
• 48:07
  And then after he's like, I can't remember he's why he's
• 48:10
  mad. But they he's mad they're
• 48:11
  getting drunk and she's like, I was sexually assaulted.
• 48:14
  And then after that he does like this weird long speech.
• 48:19
  Of course he does a speech about her sexually.
• 48:23
  What was his speech about? I can't remember.
• 48:26
  Are you ready? I'm ready.
• 48:27
  Got it? Because there's nothing I hate
• 48:30
  more than weird, almost Confessions of love.
• 48:34
  These kind of things, he goes. What happened to you does not
• 48:39
  define you. It only forged a new path that
• 48:42
  will take you to a different version of yourself.
• 48:45
  But no one can force you to walk that road.
• 48:47
  Only you can determine who will be once you get there.
• 48:50
  It's your choice. You you will become Sawyer.
• 48:54
  What? She tries to steal money from
• 48:57
  men. And then you come in and
• 49:00
  traumatize us some more and act like it's fine.
• 49:04
  You know what victims of sexual abuse love?
• 49:07
  It's you mansplaining how they should heal, as if you know a
• 49:13
  single thing. He's he's not OK with the
• 49:17
  brother sexual assault, but he is OK with drowning her in the
• 49:22
  ocean with shark while. That's happening.
• 49:24
  He did it, Yeah. How is?
• 49:28
  That the equivalent to stealing his money?
• 49:30
  He's like, I'm going to ruin her life.
• 49:33
  Yeah. It's not the same.
• 49:34
  It's not Wavelength. It's not the same.
• 49:37
  Steal her money. Steal her car.
• 49:39
  Or report her to the police, just report her and the end she
• 49:45
  will be extradited back to her country and deal with the murder
• 49:49
  of her brother blah blah blah blah.
• 49:51
  Like you don't have to worry about it.
• 49:52
  Like you don't have to rape her as revenge.
• 49:56
  It's weird. Like you said, apples and
• 49:58
  oranges. Yeah, yeah.
• 50:00
  Immediately after, he's like going on this weird rampage
• 50:03
  about killing her brother. Because, you know, that helps.
• 50:08
  You know, maybe just take yourself out, Enzo, because you
• 50:11
  did exactly the same shit. She's like, it doesn't matter if
• 50:15
  he's dead or alive, he'll always haunt me.
• 50:16
  And he's like then I will haunt you worse.
• 50:19
  You already. Are.
• 50:22
  That's not what she. Asked for.
• 50:23
  He's like, I'll haunt you worth OK.
• 50:27
  Send her to. Therapy you rich man.
• 50:29
  But it's just like. Help her.
• 50:31
  Get a new identity. Yeah, And it's like, so I'll
• 50:34
  make your life worse so you don't have to think about your
• 50:38
  molesty brother anymore. Deal.
• 50:41
  Does that sound good to you? Because it sounded like a sweet
• 50:43
  deal for me. Because I just keep.
• 50:45
  I just get to treat you like absolute trash and keep sexually
• 50:48
  assaulting you. What does?
• 50:51
  She get out of it. She gets nothing and This is why
• 50:55
  I'm convinced that this man has never had sex with anyone.
• 50:58
  It's not a believable character in any way, shape or form.
• 51:01
  It doesn't make any sense. What's his motivation?
• 51:05
  It seems to be revenge on her, but you could easily.
• 51:08
  Do that. It's not revenge on her, it's
• 51:11
  revenge on his mum. Yeah, it's revenge fault because
• 51:13
  he has this thing about her lying, but it's revenge because
• 51:17
  he's mum lied. OK, Go find your mum and throw
• 51:20
  her into the sea. Add to the ecosystem that you're
• 51:24
  so protective of. I.
• 51:26
  Literally had enough at this point, but maybe.
• 51:29
  His dad was exactly like him and that's why Mum was like, I don't
• 51:33
  fucking want this kid. True, true.
• 51:35
  True. True.
• 51:36
  Like, she could have had very good reasons to give up a baby.
• 51:39
  And why are you taking it out on a totally different young girl?
• 51:42
  Yeah. Like, stop it.
• 51:44
  Yeah, but then that stuff never has to matter for the back story
• 51:49
  of how main male characters. Do they?
• 51:51
  No, they can just males can just be trash.
• 51:54
  This book, at this stage, was super flatlining.
• 51:57
  Yeah, it was just a lot of sex in random places.
• 52:01
  Nothing was. Going on with this stupid
• 52:02
  Sylvester character, he was obviously going to be a bad guy
• 52:05
  to make Thing I Look. Good.
• 52:06
  We All we had was a weird haunted shit.
• 52:09
  The Girl in the sea. He nailed their windows shut,
• 52:14
  and window was already nailed shut.
• 52:16
  So don't you think there's something fucking cuckoo bananas
• 52:19
  with this man? Exactly.
• 52:20
  And Enzo was just slowly taking them out without telling anyone.
• 52:24
  Just leave. I'm like you're free on the
• 52:28
  island 95% of the time. But they could have captured
• 52:33
  him. And lock him in the room.
• 52:35
  That's what I mean. They could have captured him.
• 52:36
  They didn't have to kill him. Yeah, they didn't have to turn
• 52:39
  into murderers. They could have assessed the
• 52:41
  situation. Their communication problems
• 52:43
  were so bad that he didn't trust her because he hates women.
• 52:47
  She didn't know what she was doing.
• 52:49
  She was just trying to be a pick me.
• 52:50
  Like, as long as he's having sex with me.
• 52:53
  I'm fine and then old mate. Sylvester kept trying to
• 52:57
  convince, so we had to stay on the island.
• 53:00
  He's like, at least you won't need an identity here.
• 53:03
  You can just stay here forever. Like.
• 53:04
  She. Never said a single word about
• 53:06
  that, so I don't know how. He he assumed she was in trouble
• 53:09
  because she didn't really want to go.
• 53:11
  Yeah. And then Enzo was like, no, you
• 53:13
  have to stick with me. Why?
• 53:16
  What have you exactly provided? There's a point where they have
• 53:20
  sex in the ocean. This is when she was trying to
• 53:23
  kill herself. She's in the ocean like titties
• 53:26
  out. Sylvester is up in the
• 53:28
  lighthouse living his best life. She's like, I'm just going to be
• 53:32
  taken out by the cold. He's like, just live for me.
• 53:36
  That was a weird smile sex scene where he dug his fingers into
• 53:40
  her mouth. And do you remember is she bit
• 53:44
  his fingers and like smiled and he's like, oh you want to smile?
• 53:48
  And then he was fucking her from behind while holding like her
• 53:51
  mouth. Apart.
• 53:53
  Just squashed in. There's nothing worse than a
• 53:56
  male character in a book saying just live the me.
• 53:59
  Why? What have you done but
• 54:01
  traumatize her some more? Make her shitty life even worse.
• 54:05
  She nearly died on that. She took herself out in The Cave
• 54:09
  by accident, and then you wouldn't leave her alone.
• 54:12
  When I got to about 60% through the book, I was starting to miss
• 54:16
  Silver Swan because at least at least they had their tragic
• 54:20
  little gang vibes. And there was.
• 54:23
  Like. Stuck and it was just the
• 54:24
  immature little boys running around.
• 54:26
  Yeah, like, you know how you get a dark romance and you it aligns
• 54:30
  with some things and you're like, at least silver spawn had
• 54:33
  this. Well, that out of all the books,
• 54:35
  though, Silver Swan is by far the worst thing.
• 54:37
  Oh. I know, but at least there was
• 54:39
  stuff going on. Yeah.
• 54:40
  And I understand it. Just stuck on an island and that
• 54:43
  was it. I know, and I understand that HD
• 54:46
  Carlton, for whatever reason, is raking it in.
• 54:49
  And get your bag, sis. She's probably rolling around in
• 54:51
  money as we speak, and I'm fully jealous.
• 54:54
  That's good for you, girl, but can we have some?
• 54:58
  Plot Where's the quality? Are you dead ass going to give
• 55:02
  us this stuff and tell us that we should be propping?
• 55:07
  I have no words for you. What are these people frosting
• 55:10
  over? I'm confused.
• 55:12
  That's. The thing I don't think I would
• 55:14
  have read this, the only thing that got me halfway through is,
• 55:17
  is like, I want to know what's going upstairs.
• 55:20
  That's all I wanted to know. I didn't care.
• 55:22
  About the rest, Okay. Sylvester was still hanging on
• 55:25
  to this idea that she should stay.
• 55:28
  She's told you that many times. She doesn't want to stay.
• 55:31
  Just get over it, my bro. It was the.
• 55:34
  Longest plot point of this whole book, him just being like no,
• 55:37
  you have to stay. You have to stay.
• 55:38
  You have to stay. I need Maya needs company go
• 55:43
  live on this island all. Her problem?
• 55:45
  Because she's a slim, white blonde girl that she has to
• 55:48
  fulfill all these man's needs. Yeah.
• 55:51
  Sylvester, who she only met, and Enzo, who technically is.
• 55:54
  Sylvester, he's got to be. He's got.
• 55:55
  To be like 60s. 70s. It's got to be what kind of life
• 55:59
  is that? Just existing for men.
• 56:01
  And you know, Sylvester's just going to want to bang her at
• 56:03
  some point because he's psychotic.
• 56:05
  Well, he's technically trying to touch her.
• 56:08
  And yeah, well, he was trying to like rub her leg and stuff and
• 56:13
  he was like smiling at her. And I'm like his teeth are
• 56:15
  rotten. Was he trying to groom her to be
• 56:17
  his replacement daughter? I yeah, I think he was trying to
• 56:22
  add another one to the mix. The end of the book where all
• 56:27
  the shit happens. He's getting nothing out of it.
• 56:31
  Like he loves the way she talks because she's fucking batshit
• 56:35
  crazy. So if she can't talk, then what
• 56:38
  are you getting out of it? So do we want to get into the
• 56:41
  third act or I guess, yeah, what is building up to be the climax
• 56:46
  of this book from a completely long pointless?
• 56:50
  Flat line. Yeah, it's just pure sex to
• 56:52
  this. Her being this predicament.
• 56:55
  OK, cool. There's a bit of a mystery
• 56:56
  there. Then obviously her meeting ends.
• 56:59
  So that's the next big thing that happens, them getting
• 57:02
  shipwrecked on this island, Right.
• 57:04
  OK, And then this is where the huge flat line was when nothing
• 57:07
  was going on. Yeah.
• 57:09
  And then we get to this point when we're like.
• 57:11
  A key What is happening? And it was kind of predictable
• 57:14
  what ends up happening. Yeah.
• 57:17
  Why are we given this plot? Who are we rooting for?
• 57:22
  Which is a question. We're rooting for a new one,
• 57:25
  honestly. Because we can't be rooting for
• 57:27
  Enzo, no. He's trash.
• 57:30
  We're not, really. Rooting for her.
• 57:31
  This is the only time he's apparently he's got, like, so
• 57:34
  much hair by the time they leave, but they've been there
• 57:36
  for 20 days. I I don't understand.
• 57:39
  Why they didn't just kill 20 months.
• 57:41
  They could have captured, killed him, subdued him on Day 2.
• 57:44
  Yeah. They get to a point where they
• 57:47
  uncover more about Sylvester's past and they find out that it
• 57:51
  wasn't in fact a ghost girl that was out in the windows at night
• 57:54
  time, but a real girl a. Real girl his.
• 57:58
  Daughter that he has had chained up drinking those little liquid
• 58:04
  milk protein drinks. Yeah, through a stomach.
• 58:08
  Oh. Which was quite foul.
• 58:11
  Quite foul. So he had cut out her tongue,
• 58:14
  sewed up her mouth, and her mouth was rotting.
• 58:16
  I actually am surprised she didn't die from the mouth.
• 58:19
  Rot in infection. Yeah, it took.
• 58:22
  Over a hard swing into horror. I'm not surprised, honestly.
• 58:27
  If you were on an island, why would you believe this man
• 58:30
  telling you about ghosts when there is a you can hear the
• 58:32
  screams and her kicking. On the roof above you.
• 58:35
  You're trying to get to the lighthouse beacon thing, but you
• 58:40
  don't think a real human's locked up there.
• 58:43
  That doesn't make any sense, right?
• 58:45
  You know what? Piss me off.
• 58:47
  Piss me off so much every time they heard the fucking chains
• 58:51
  walk past their room. And they didn't think to.
• 58:53
  Look under the door. Yeah, That's the first thing I
• 58:55
  would have done. I would have looked under the
• 58:57
  fucking door. Maybe it was two pitch black out
• 58:59
  there. They wouldn't see anything.
• 59:00
  No, you're telling me that fucking what's her name?
• 59:04
  Casey was walking around in the dark.
• 59:07
  Yeah. Do you not have fun?
• 59:09
  We're walking around in the. Fucking dark.
• 59:11
  Just moonlight for AT. Nine 9:00.
• 59:15
  And then he cracks a Why was she walking around?
• 59:18
  She was walking to his bedroom because he was raping her, so I
• 59:23
  didn't know she could. Freely walk around.
• 59:25
  No, aren't. So that's why she was getting
• 59:27
  locked in her room. So, oh, OK, she had the chains
• 59:31
  on her hands and legs. You know, the typical prison
• 59:35
  chains. And every night he'd lock her up
• 59:37
  so she can freely walk around at 9:00, but she's walking up to
• 59:40
  his bedroom. That's the only thing past their
• 59:42
  room. And then she walked back down.
• 59:45
  The older sister killed herself. Yeah, Trinity killed herself.
• 59:48
  Yep. He killed Raven.
• 59:50
  Trinity killed himself, and then he kept Casey.
• 59:53
  Fucking hell, I'd rather be the person that.
• 59:55
  Just died. But the poor girl was so
• 59:58
  groomed, she was conflicted. She was trying to help him leave
• 1:00:01
  and then she was like. Well known.
• 1:00:03
  I have to make them stay like she.
• 1:00:05
  Oh yeah, she was fully psychologically.
• 1:00:07
  Yeah, yeah. I just don't understand how they
• 1:00:10
  never put it together. Oh no, you've got all that time.
• 1:00:15
  Communicate with each other at something except vapid shit
• 1:00:18
  about how you love each other's fucking genitals and we might
• 1:00:20
  have gotten somewhere. See, if this was us, we would
• 1:00:24
  have figured this out day three. I know we would have been taking
• 1:00:29
  sleeping breaks, I reckon. We would have just looked at
• 1:00:31
  each other and be like, let's kill this bitch.
• 1:00:34
  I you know what I would never have done?
• 1:00:36
  What? The bit where she sees the girl
• 1:00:38
  out in the ocean and she's screaming.
• 1:00:40
  Yeah, I would have kept quiet and watched.
• 1:00:42
  I would just sat there and be like, what is she doing?
• 1:00:45
  Like, is that a real person? Dead ass like.
• 1:00:46
  Or am I actually? Watching.
• 1:00:48
  Exactly. Put your glasses on.
• 1:00:50
  Get off. Get off the piss bucket for one
• 1:00:52
  second. Is that a real bitch?
• 1:00:54
  Am I hallucinating? Bring it to the window.
• 1:00:57
  Bring your piss bucket to the window for a second.
• 1:01:00
  It's like, I know you're pissing because you're just continually.
• 1:01:03
  Pissing. We would have feeded out day
• 1:01:07
  three. I know that sounds really
• 1:01:09
  confident, but we would Nancy Drew the shit out of this
• 1:01:11
  situation. I'd be like, I'm not staying
• 1:01:13
  here. I'm sweaty.
• 1:01:15
  You and you know what? I didn't care how they were
• 1:01:17
  like. He doesn't know where the caves
• 1:01:20
  are. He's been.
• 1:01:21
  On that island. Forever.
• 1:01:23
  Like ever, he knows where every years.
• 1:01:26
  Why is there nothing else on the island?
• 1:01:28
  I know it's giving lost. There's probably a hatch
• 1:01:31
  somewhere. There's probably polar bears.
• 1:01:35
  Just fucking. There's the others.
• 1:01:37
  There's like all sorts of shit. I just don't understand.
• 1:01:43
  Wasn't there a bit where he was kind of lying about the ships
• 1:01:45
  too? Yeah, they could have easily.
• 1:01:48
  He could have easily communicated.
• 1:01:50
  So Soya literally goes, oh, I think he's lying about the ships
• 1:01:55
  because they come by more often and she's been watching, but she
• 1:01:59
  never tells Enzo until last minute.
• 1:02:01
  Yeah, I was like put your information.
• 1:02:03
  To fucking gather. Guys, you were like 3 weeks in.
• 1:02:10
  All you've been doing is fucking.
• 1:02:11
  I'm like if. You want to get off this island,
• 1:02:14
  You just need to work together. But you know what wouldn't?
• 1:02:16
  Every passing week, considering she doesn't have access to birth
• 1:02:19
  control, the chances of you getting pregnant because you're
• 1:02:23
  fucking every day, she. Said she had the bar.
• 1:02:27
  Oh, good. So somehow in magic medical
• 1:02:31
  land, without a real identity and she magically she wouldn't
• 1:02:36
  have Medicare. So yeah, but that probably would
• 1:02:39
  have been done in wherever she was.
• 1:02:41
  No, she would have done in Australia.
• 1:02:45
  Well, she could have walked. Into a free clinic and said I'm
• 1:02:47
  15, please give me birth control or I'm gonna have babies and
• 1:02:50
  they'd be like, OK, just give it to her.
• 1:02:51
  Yeah. Yeah.
• 1:02:51
  Fair, fair. So I'm sure they would have been
• 1:02:53
  white, but anyway. We got to go back.
• 1:02:55
  We got, you know. That wackling we're.
• 1:02:59
  Back by cycling. We will never.
• 1:03:01
  I'm not comfortable with continuing this book, so let's
• 1:03:03
  just circle into nothingness. Lots of people who go on the bar
• 1:03:06
  have a never ending period. Can you imagine being on this
• 1:03:09
  deserted island with these two idiots and having a continual
• 1:03:12
  period? I'm sure she's ovulating every
• 1:03:15
  second of the minute. And I'm sure he would have loved
• 1:03:17
  it because he'd be like, yeah, bring your period out into the
• 1:03:19
  water so we can have sharks circling around.
• 1:03:21
  Us. You know they do another sex
• 1:03:24
  bit. He's drowning her in The Cave to
• 1:03:26
  make it a nicer memory for her. Fuck.
• 1:03:29
  Off. Just cut off all of my oxygen at
• 1:03:31
  this point just just drowned me. Actually just.
• 1:03:35
  Drowned me just. Drowned me?
• 1:03:37
  Yeah. I just want to be drowned.
• 1:03:42
  I just wanted to. So they there is some kind of
• 1:03:45
  hatch? Yeah, I believe it's in the
• 1:03:47
  house or something. They're trying to find the
• 1:03:50
  beacon and they're like, we need to distract him.
• 1:03:54
  And she does this stupid thing where she goes downstairs and
• 1:03:57
  she's like, if I get him to think we're staying, he'll leave
• 1:04:00
  us alone. But then he actually asks her
• 1:04:02
  and she's like, no, I'm not staying.
• 1:04:04
  I would never stay. Because she's.
• 1:04:06
  She's like, let's give him false hope.
• 1:04:08
  I would never stay the 2nd that ship comes around.
• 1:04:12
  I'm leaving your ass. And then he goes full blackmail.
• 1:04:15
  He's like, Oh, well, I'm going to hand you in.
• 1:04:18
  And like, who cares? I'll be like hand me.
• 1:04:20
  In We're Stuck on an Island. I've got about two weeks.
• 1:04:23
  You're off your ass, mate. It's fine.
• 1:04:25
  They're not going to believe you anyway.
• 1:04:26
  Yeah, so they there's one point where they finally, physically
• 1:04:29
  overpower him. Did she push him down the Hatch
• 1:04:31
  thing? No, sorry, he slapped her.
• 1:04:34
  And that's when Enzo came down the stairs.
• 1:04:36
  Somehow this man just has a gun on hand and she was like, I'll
• 1:04:42
  be fine. She actually legs it.
• 1:04:44
  So she's in The Cave that he she thinks he has no idea where they
• 1:04:48
  are, but he's mapped out the fucking island probably his
• 1:04:51
  whole life. Enzo kicks down the door and
• 1:04:54
  then gets into like a tussle with Sylvester.
• 1:04:57
  And then he sees the cellar and pushes Sylvester in and then
• 1:05:01
  locks the door. Yeah, and check.
• 1:05:03
  If. He's dead, my bro.
• 1:05:05
  It's just enough. So the thing that pissed me off
• 1:05:09
  about this book is how is Sylvester pulling one over Enzo
• 1:05:15
  every? Single time, exactly.
• 1:05:17
  How I don't understand. This is an old man with.
• 1:05:22
  A tongue. Peg leg that can barely.
• 1:05:24
  Walk that was pushed down a cellar.
• 1:05:26
  Yeah. Which would have had a rickety
• 1:05:28
  ass ladder to get up as well, yeah, and locks him in.
• 1:05:33
  And then, of course, he runs to The Cave, because he knows that
• 1:05:35
  she would have gone there to hide.
• 1:05:37
  Yeah. And then instead of dealing with
• 1:05:39
  the situation, they have sex for a million years.
• 1:05:43
  Yep. And then they just wait till the
• 1:05:45
  next day. What?
• 1:05:48
  They're so confident that he's just trapped in there.
• 1:05:51
  He could have had a million escape.
• 1:05:53
  Route. It's his fucking.
• 1:05:54
  Light House. It's his house.
• 1:05:57
  And then they just confidently waltz back, just thinking it's
• 1:05:59
  all Gucci. He apparently goes and checks
• 1:06:02
  1st and then he's like, well, he's missing.
• 1:06:05
  Who'd have thought that if we fucked until dawn, he might have
• 1:06:09
  had time to escape? He might have just laughed.
• 1:06:13
  Then. That's when they find Casey
• 1:06:16
  after that, because that's when they fuck on the table.
• 1:06:20
  That's when he finds the credit card again and he's pissed at.
• 1:06:24
  Us pissed again, Bro, You don't even have money right now.
• 1:06:27
  Don't even worry where. Is she going to spend it?
• 1:06:31
  What are you walking? Down the road to Maya's to get a
• 1:06:34
  new bikini. He's like you've.
• 1:06:36
  Fucking made it on. Just snap it in, half my babes
• 1:06:39
  like he finds it under the mattress and he's like.
• 1:06:42
  You intended to keep this, she? Slid it onto the mattress so you
• 1:06:45
  wouldn't see it. She's also stuck on the fucking
• 1:06:48
  island with you, yeah? He got really mad about it.
• 1:06:53
  It's. OK, that you rape her
• 1:06:55
  continually, but she's not allowed to be mad about.
• 1:06:58
  That. No, she's just supposed to be OK
• 1:07:01
  with it. Just.
• 1:07:02
  OK with it just. OK.
• 1:07:05
  It's OK, Emily, because her brother did worse.
• 1:07:09
  So this is when they finally find the fucking thing upstairs.
• 1:07:15
  The beacon. The beacon.
• 1:07:16
  That's when they find Casey Mouse Own.
• 1:07:19
  She's like, yeah, trying to get them to help, to leave.
• 1:07:23
  And then as soon as Enzo's running back downstairs, because
• 1:07:26
  apparently Sylvester has come out of nowhere again.
• 1:07:31
  I want to know what vitamins he's taking.
• 1:07:33
  I just I need to play the bowl. He's not this man's.
• 1:07:37
  Malnourished, he probably has to boil his water.
• 1:07:41
  He's eating space food years at a time.
• 1:07:44
  He's eating beans. He's farting up the storm.
• 1:07:49
  Beans are one of the best things you can eat though, so it makes
• 1:07:53
  a lot of sense. Beans are not vegetables.
• 1:07:57
  No wonder why. He's like Superman.
• 1:08:00
  Just so. I'm just.
• 1:08:02
  Enzo goes downstairs and he's like, you know, you got to stay
• 1:08:05
  up here just in case it's a gunfight.
• 1:08:07
  Oh. Leave.
• 1:08:09
  Leave her. Upstairs, with that meant to be.
• 1:08:11
  Part of it. Leave the bitch upstairs with
• 1:08:15
  the mentally and unhinged girl that's being trapped.
• 1:08:18
  Exactly Who can't communicate? You don't know whose side she's
• 1:08:21
  on. They already had a feeling they
• 1:08:22
  were like, Oh my gosh, she's just loyal to him.
• 1:08:27
  As soon as she hears the tussle and downstairs the wrestle and
• 1:08:31
  tussle, the wrestle and tussle, Casey's like I'm going.
• 1:08:34
  To kill her, she's like full. Head.
• 1:08:37
  Spins around her. Body.
• 1:08:40
  And so it's like, absolutely not and runs downstairs.
• 1:08:43
  Why don't you lock that bitch upstairs?
• 1:08:45
  Why does it have to be gunfight though?
• 1:08:46
  Just. Knock.
• 1:08:47
  The man out he's old man, but I don't.
• 1:08:51
  Understand what happens, because he doesn't even get shot and
• 1:08:55
  somehow Enzo ends up in the fucking cellar being knocked out
• 1:08:59
  by Sylvester pistol at that bitch.
• 1:09:02
  I don't care. What's going on?
• 1:09:05
  Don't understand how. How did he get?
• 1:09:09
  How are we supposed to believe that Enzo is this big muscly,
• 1:09:13
  big dicked man and he's getting taken out by this decrepit peg
• 1:09:18
  leg, peg leg, little gnome? Man.
• 1:09:22
  Not once, not. Twice.
• 1:09:24
  Like four or five times. I know I.
• 1:09:26
  Don't know what to say? No wonder why he wasn't feeding
• 1:09:29
  him the good steaks. He's like, what?
• 1:09:33
  How am I supposed to kill him if he's beefing?
• 1:09:37
  I. Just at this point, the wagon
• 1:09:41
  wheels have. All fallen off the plot.
• 1:09:43
  I was just insane. I was just like.
• 1:09:46
  And the. The problem is, this all
• 1:09:47
  happened at the last bit of the book.
• 1:09:49
  Yeah, so we're barely. I I know everything was so
• 1:09:54
  unbelievable and I know it's booked, so that's fine.
• 1:09:57
  But somehow I could function with the ocean.
• 1:10:00
  The shark fucking. Pride.
• 1:10:04
  The the identity theft, the fraud, the magpie circling,
• 1:10:08
  murdering her brother. I was like.
• 1:10:10
  Everything else was fine, but I did not.
• 1:10:13
  I could not get past the fact that Sylvester was take it.
• 1:10:16
  He was the Terminator. The Terminator.
• 1:10:19
  He was two fully functioning adults.
• 1:10:23
  So stupid we could take him and with like. 100 and.
• 1:10:28
  Something pounds just both of us together.
• 1:10:32
  I just no. Weight 200 dollar 200 you.
• 1:10:34
  Have a gun? Just lock the front door, aiming
• 1:10:37
  out the window and shoot the man who could bail him.
• 1:10:39
  He's not that. Hard oh.
• 1:10:41
  My God. Also, if I was running
• 1:10:45
  downstairs to get away from some psycho bitch in chains, I would
• 1:10:49
  have shut and locked the door. Oh.
• 1:10:51
  Easy. Or just trip.
• 1:10:53
  Her. She's in change.
• 1:10:58
  I. Casey was just so.
• 1:11:01
  Conflicted the entire time, though.
• 1:11:03
  Just As for Casey. Just As for Casey.
• 1:11:05
  Because every time they got one up on Sylvester, she came out of
• 1:11:08
  nowhere and fucking saved the day.
• 1:11:11
  Oh. I honestly was so pissed that I
• 1:11:15
  just didn't even write any more notes.
• 1:11:17
  The last note I wrote was literally about the bikini
• 1:11:21
  bottoms. I was just done.
• 1:11:22
  I was like, I'm not. Spongebob's not even having it.
• 1:11:25
  Rusty Bikini bottoms. Anyway, the only reason.
• 1:11:31
  Sorry, I'm like did this is? Actually more mad than pen pal.
• 1:11:33
  Or less mad more. I was so mad because I didn't
• 1:11:37
  understand how two fully grown adults, healthy fully grown
• 1:11:41
  adults, kept getting taken out by this man who could barely
• 1:11:45
  walk, you know? What I think it is, they exerted
• 1:11:47
  too much energy fucking all the time, That guy.
• 1:11:51
  Every afternoon. They're just like they're
• 1:11:53
  depleted, They're dehydrated, their fluids are gone.
• 1:11:56
  She's squirting everywhere. She has no.
• 1:11:59
  Electrolytes. Well, if she's squirting
• 1:12:01
  everywhere, he is hydrated, OK? He's lapping that up?
• 1:12:06
  No, but there's no electrolytes. They're dehydrated.
• 1:12:09
  They've got heat stroke from being outside trying to fish and
• 1:12:11
  not catching anything. The old man's just inside all
• 1:12:15
  day. What?
• 1:12:16
  Hydrated, Waiting. Waiting.
• 1:12:19
  They. Constantly were having sex in
• 1:12:21
  public places. Like he wasn't wanking out of
• 1:12:24
  the lighthouse building. Uh huh.
• 1:12:27
  At least they get to have their public sex at this.
• 1:12:29
  Place. True, true, true.
• 1:12:31
  I'm all for them having sex everywhere.
• 1:12:33
  Good for them, at least. No one else has to be subjected
• 1:12:36
  to it. Except poor Casey.
• 1:12:38
  Oh yeah, but she just. She just sit.
• 1:12:41
  I don't know how they did it, and that's what really drives me
• 1:12:44
  at all anyway. The only reason they pull one
• 1:12:49
  over this fucking imbecile of a man, is because Casey gets shot.
• 1:12:55
  She takes a shot for Enzo. I don't even think she takes a
• 1:12:58
  shot for Enzo. I think the old man just didn't
• 1:13:00
  line it up properly. Lined it, didn't line it up
• 1:13:04
  properly. Yeah, true and.
• 1:13:06
  Oops. And they were all in shock
• 1:13:08
  instead of just shooting him with the never ending bullets
• 1:13:11
  this man seems to have. He.
• 1:13:13
  Burns a hole in his throat with a gun.
• 1:13:16
  No, no. No, no.
• 1:13:19
  It also turns out that Sylvester is just offering people that
• 1:13:22
  show up on the island, and they're under in that cellar is
• 1:13:25
  just a gravesite. Enzo heats up the gun on the
• 1:13:29
  oven and jams it into his throat.
• 1:13:31
  That takes time. Yeah, and burns like a hole in
• 1:13:34
  his throat. And then they just go, oh,
• 1:13:37
  you'll have to take Trinity's identity.
• 1:13:41
  Yeah, that casually worked out well.
• 1:13:42
  And then she was panicking because she's like the police
• 1:13:44
  and everything. They're going to grill me.
• 1:13:46
  And then they didn't really. They're like, oh, she's kind of
• 1:13:48
  being trapped on this island forever.
• 1:13:50
  Hello. DNA test.
• 1:13:52
  Yeah, why isn't anyone checking? What is going on?
• 1:13:57
  Conveniently, Sawyer's identity has just evaporated because she
• 1:14:00
  could have been lost to. See just on this random suicide
• 1:14:05
  note that she wrote from Sawyer and then it turns out that her
• 1:14:08
  brother was consulting heaps of people.
• 1:14:12
  Heaps of children. Disgusting, but I.
• 1:14:15
  Understand how that came out, but she was still getting emails
• 1:14:20
  from people telling her to come back and fix it for him.
• 1:14:24
  Which it's kind of like nothing's going to happen in 20
• 1:14:27
  days like that quickly. Yeah, they're not going to
• 1:14:29
  suddenly be like, oh, there was actually 40 girls that were
• 1:14:32
  affected by him in the space of 20 days.
• 1:14:35
  Yeah. What happens between her and
• 1:14:37
  Enzo? What happens?
• 1:14:39
  Yeah. She moves in with him.
• 1:14:41
  Even though the police are, like, against it.
• 1:14:43
  They're like, you need to go to a women's shelter.
• 1:14:45
  You need therapy. You need somehow.
• 1:14:48
  She's very adjusted to life in the real world, and they didn't
• 1:14:51
  question the single thing. But she's going to change her
• 1:14:54
  name because she doesn't want to be Trinity.
• 1:14:56
  She wants her real name. And he's like, yeah, I know what
• 1:15:00
  you're changing your last name to and changes it to his last
• 1:15:03
  name somehow. She's really scared to go on a
• 1:15:07
  boat. So the helicopter like that's
• 1:15:09
  any better to the lab to show her the lamb.
• 1:15:12
  You the. Lab the Lamb.
• 1:15:14
  But they get. Married two years later and the
• 1:15:17
  book ends on them fucking in a shark cage.
• 1:15:21
  Of course. And she's like, conveniently,
• 1:15:24
  I'm not haunted by my brother anymore because my current.
• 1:15:26
  Boyfriend is horrible because I'm in such high stress all the
• 1:15:30
  time. I can never just live.
• 1:15:32
  I'm constantly being thrown into a fucking Shark Tank to have
• 1:15:36
  sex. At least we didn't get the baby
• 1:15:40
  or pregnancy trope. We didn't even get the anal to
• 1:15:43
  love Pipeline. That's because they don't love
• 1:15:45
  each other, actually. There's no I'm.
• 1:15:50
  Almost certain he puts a finger in her ass at some point.
• 1:15:53
  So we own the epilogue. No, it's somewhere in the.
• 1:15:56
  I think it's when they're in The Cave, but I'm not 100%.
• 1:16:00
  Him and his fishy, but I don't. Think he loves her?
• 1:16:03
  Of course not. I think he owns her.
• 1:16:05
  He hates women. Actually, in saying that, there
• 1:16:07
  is a bit where she goes, I know he's just obsessed with me and
• 1:16:11
  he doesn't love me because that's how my brother used to
• 1:16:13
  look at me. So even she's aware that he's
• 1:16:16
  just obsessed. So what are we going to rake
• 1:16:19
  this out of? Out of five.
• 1:16:21
  Piss buckets. How many piss buckets would you
• 1:16:26
  have filled up out? Of half of 1.
• 1:16:32
  We've never done half of 1. You know what I wanted to bring
• 1:16:35
  up? Because I like the Goodreads
• 1:16:37
  rating system because it helps give us a bit of an idea of what
• 1:16:40
  ratings actually mean. So on Goodreads, 1 equals.
• 1:16:43
  I didn't like it, 2 equals it was OK 3 = I liked it, 4 equals,
• 1:16:49
  I really liked it. And five equals.
• 1:16:51
  It was amazing. OK, all of one.
• 1:16:54
  Yeah, I didn't like it. I didn't like it.
• 1:16:56
  One piss bucket out of five, which I completely agree.
• 1:16:59
  I even agree with half a one bucket.
• 1:17:02
  Yeah, half a one piss bucket. The.
• 1:17:04
  Only reason I read this was because I was forced to.
• 1:17:09
  Because we were going to make this podcast.
• 1:17:11
  Yeah, but it's because of that. Sometimes when I read books, I
• 1:17:15
  get the weird, chesty, anxiety pain when they're going through
• 1:17:18
  things because I've written. Because it's like it must feel
• 1:17:21
  real, yeah. To me and.
• 1:17:23
  This whole time I was just wanting it to be done.
• 1:17:26
  Exactly. It was an uncomfortable book.
• 1:17:28
  And even if the main male character is morally grey or
• 1:17:32
  completely morally fucked, yeah. At least.
• 1:17:35
  Make him hot. Yeah, he.
• 1:17:37
  Was giving festy and. Horrible.
• 1:17:40
  They were both musty as fuck. I trying to be open minded about
• 1:17:44
  dark romance is sometimes hard because you you try and get over
• 1:17:48
  the non consensual things and you try and get over.
• 1:17:51
  But if the male character doesn't like the female
• 1:17:54
  character, yeah. Why?
• 1:17:57
  What are we doing here? They're not fighting to be
• 1:18:00
  together or they're not even proper enemies to lovers.
• 1:18:03
  What are we doing here? So anyway, as ranty as this one
• 1:18:07
  was, was there anything good about it?
• 1:18:13
  Crickets. Actual.
• 1:18:15
  Crickets. So this one was a total flush it
• 1:18:21
  down the toilet. Situation.
• 1:18:23
  Really, the only reason I read it was because I wanted to know
• 1:18:26
  what was upstairs. If I had a physical copy, I
• 1:18:29
  would tear it to shreds and set it on.
• 1:18:31
  File return it. So that's it.
• 1:18:34
  Or does it Hurt? By HD Carlton, thanks for
• 1:18:37
  joining us on Lose the Plot with Carla and Emily.
• 1:18:40
  Don't forget to rate US five stars and subscribe.
• 1:18:42
  If you enjoyed Slide into our DMS on TikTok or Instagram Lose
• 1:18:46
  The Plot podcast.