Latest / I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar / A Fond Memory: Maria Bamford Disobeys Bridger

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A Fond Memory: Maria Bamford Disobeys Bridger · I Said No Gifts! A comedy interview podcast with Bridger Winegar

• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here. I thought I made myself
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: perfectly clear. But you're a guest to my home. You
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: gotta come to me empty, And I said, no, guests,
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: your own presences presents enough.
• 0:31
  Speaker 2: I already had too much stuff, So how.
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: Did you dare to surbey me?
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: Welcome to I said, no gifts. I'm Bridger Wineger. We're
• 0:54
  Speaker 3: in the backyard. It's the two hundredth episode. Can you
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: imagine two hundred episodes of this podcast? Hundreds of hours
• 1:04
  Speaker 3: of whatever's happening here? Thank you for being here. If
• 1:08
  Speaker 3: this is your first episode, pause, go back. There's at
• 1:11
  Speaker 3: least one hundred and ninety nine more for you to
• 1:13
  Speaker 3: listen to before you get here, from the beginning. And
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: I mean, I just could not be more excited about
• 1:21
  Speaker 3: today's guest. This is the person you get for a
• 1:24
  Speaker 3: two hundredth episode right here. It's Maria Vamford. Hello.
• 1:27
  Speaker 4: I'm not very well known, but that doesn't matter. In
• 1:30
  Speaker 4: the Internet age, you can have a career.
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: What are you talking about? That is the you're one
• 1:38
  Speaker 3: of the all time greats? Well, I think amongst some people,
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: I won't even accept that as an answer. Give me
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: a break.
• 1:45
  Speaker 4: But that's free kind. Now, this is something people ask
• 1:49
  Speaker 4: you when you have a certain kind of job. Would
• 1:52
  Speaker 4: you get this? Who's your favorite comedian?
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: My favorite comedian? Yes, I don't have a favorite, Okay,
• 1:58
  Speaker 3: I had it pick favorites. I have several people who
• 2:01
  Speaker 3: I know will always make me laugh, and you're one of.
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: Them, that's for kind. I always feel like it's family
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: and friends who are the funniest to me, just because
• 2:10
  Speaker 4: it's always extremely personal and like that makes me laugh
• 2:16
  Speaker 4: until I cry.
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: That's such a good time.
• 2:19
  Speaker 5: And I can get them on a Sunday night anyways.
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: I think that's true though, like people I grew up with,
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: if I see them like from high school, college, no
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: one makes me laugh like that, right, But maybe that's
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: a different type of laughter. I don't know.
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: I don't know, but I'm willing to pay for it.
• 2:41
  Speaker 3: Out of your friends and family, can you pick a
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: number one?
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: Uh, definitely my mom and dad who are since past,
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: but I can do impersonations of them, so I creepily
• 2:51
  Speaker 4: do that to myself sometimes go in to a reverie
• 2:56
  Speaker 4: and think about what I think my mom would say,
• 2:59
  Speaker 4: or what I would wanted her to say, which is
• 3:03
  Speaker 4: really more that I believe is part of the arts
• 3:07
  Speaker 4: is trying to have some sort of control over your
• 3:09
  Speaker 4: past and redoing things.
• 3:13
  Speaker 3: Just a completely uncontrollable period of your life. When you
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: do that, is it when you're driving you're alone at home.
• 3:19
  Speaker 4: Usually by myself because it seems to disturb people in
• 3:23
  Speaker 4: my life when I go.
• 3:25
  Speaker 5: You know, Scott, if I said to my husband, Scott, listen,
• 3:31
  Speaker 5: I am just so proud of you, which is something
• 3:35
  Speaker 5: my mother might say, he's stop it, stop it.
• 3:38
  Speaker 4: And then with friends, they don't say stop it because
• 3:42
  Speaker 4: they are my friends. But there grows a silence. Yes,
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: there's a silence.
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: It's not warm. It's not a warm response, which I
• 3:53
  Speaker 4: get it. I mean, I get it. That's why I
• 3:55
  Speaker 4: keep it to myself. And I'm one of the best
• 3:57
  Speaker 4: crowds there is.
• 3:58
  Speaker 3: You feel like you're a good crowd. Oh my god.
• 4:01
  Speaker 4: Well especially for my own shit.
• 4:03
  Speaker 3: For your own stuff, my own, Oh my god.
• 4:06
  Speaker 5: My own.
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: I cannot stop laughing at my own stuff.
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: I appreciate that.
• 4:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, why else get into it except.
• 4:20
  Speaker 3: To amuse oneself. I feel like the last time I
• 4:24
  Speaker 3: saw you was at PDA and Alta Dina at eight am.
• 4:28
  Speaker 4: Right. Sometimes sometimes there's these limitations that we put ourselves
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: on of like, oh, I can only serve food within
• 4:36
  Speaker 4: the restaurant. You know clearly that's not true. So I
• 4:41
  Speaker 4: do off hours comedy shows. Point being, I want people
• 4:46
  Speaker 4: who know, who've gone out of their way to come
• 4:49
  Speaker 4: see something. They've got skin in the game.
• 4:51
  Speaker 6: Now.
• 4:52
  Speaker 4: The only problem about eight am shows babies. A lot
• 4:55
  Speaker 4: of times babies, Oh they have to come. Babies come
• 4:57
  Speaker 4: to shows, and that is that's a drunk a baby,
• 5:02
  Speaker 4: It's just a drunk. But yeah, no, it's been really lovely.
• 5:06
  Speaker 4: It's also the you get it out of the way
• 5:09
  Speaker 4: because I get nervous for show. So it's like I
• 5:11
  Speaker 4: get to have a show as soon as I wake
• 5:12
  Speaker 4: up and then be set free.
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: Yeah, to have one at seven o'clock probably ruins your day.
• 5:17
  Speaker 4: Well, sometimes it depends, but sometimes I get very anxious
• 5:23
  Speaker 4: and there's no reason to but my lizard brain gets anxious.
• 5:28
  Speaker 4: So I was trying to trick myself with morning shows. Anyways,
• 5:33
  Speaker 4: there's nothing less important than comedy. Let's just can we
• 5:37
  Speaker 4: can we just?
• 5:37
  Speaker 3: I feel like that's true. I feel like there's truly
• 5:41
  Speaker 3: nothing in the world that we could do more without
• 5:46
  Speaker 3: than comedy.
• 5:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah, how are you doing.
• 5:51
  Speaker 3: I want to ask, that's a great question, that's an
• 5:54
  Speaker 3: incredible question.
• 5:55
  Speaker 4: You've got beautiful colors on Oh thank you. You're wearing
• 5:58
  Speaker 4: a purple and a tea, which is very pleasant to see.
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: You always have good color zone. Oh my god, I
• 6:05
  Speaker 3: feel like you're always vibrant. And you've got this like
• 6:08
  Speaker 3: a plum.
• 6:09
  Speaker 4: I've got a plum and a lot. I'm doing a
• 6:11
  Speaker 4: lot of rainbows and a lot of unique eyeglasses.
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: How many glasses do you have?
• 6:17
  Speaker 4: I believe seven pair, but I'm always losing pairs due
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: to a lack of a being in the moment. Can't
• 6:26
  Speaker 4: be in the moment.
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: Do you keep a pair in your car? I keep
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: a pair in my car.
• 6:31
  Speaker 4: Now, that's so smart. Will I will do that?
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: Yes, although I guess you don't wear contacts.
• 6:38
  Speaker 4: I don't wear contacts. Yeah. I only needed glasses when
• 6:42
  Speaker 4: I turned fifty.
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: Oh wow, Yeah it took that long.
• 6:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah. I'm fifty three and I'm too old not to
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: be a success in show business, Am I right, Dame
• 6:55
  Speaker 4: Judy Dench, I'm not old enough to start hitting it
• 6:59
  Speaker 4: out of a park.
• 7:05
  Speaker 3: No, I keep a pair because I have the fear
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: of my contacts. Drying out, and then what do I
• 7:09
  Speaker 3: do if I don't have a way to drive home?
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: So I'll have the glasses in the car.
• 7:13
  Speaker 4: So your I say, it is pretty not great? Not great?
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: Well, it hasn't been great since maybe eighth grade.
• 7:19
  Speaker 4: What's your numbers?
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: Negative? Four, seven, five? Whoa, which I guess is bad.
• 7:26
  Speaker 4: That's pretty bad, I mean from what I known nothing
• 7:29
  Speaker 4: about it, and yet I want to judge my friends
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: on the I GOS shop is Society the spectacle. I
• 7:36
  Speaker 4: love that place, forty six in New York. Check it
• 7:38
  Speaker 4: out if you are ever in Highland Park, California. Owned
• 7:41
  Speaker 4: by two sisters. They've been in the I gas industry
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: for over forty years and they are the best in
• 7:47
  Speaker 4: that they will let you try glasses on four hours
• 7:50
  Speaker 4: with no suggestion that you have to buy them. It
• 7:54
  Speaker 4: is fun because that's what you want to do. You
• 7:56
  Speaker 4: want to go into a shop and try on all
• 7:58
  Speaker 4: the shit and leave.
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: And they have such a variety there. Yeah, and I've
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: had that exact experience. I haven't purchased anything there yet,
• 8:05
  Speaker 3: but I've gone in it. Don't do it. I refuse
• 8:07
  Speaker 3: to give them my business.
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: Of course, they're just lovely salespeople. They're like, hey, no,
• 8:12
  Speaker 4: oh my god, you don't have to. But yeah, I
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: am a very good customer in that I because I
• 8:19
  Speaker 4: keep losing them.
• 8:20
  Speaker 3: Now, how are you doing?
• 8:22
  Speaker 4: I'm great getting solar installed, selling on lease. Uh and
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: so they just started today. She said, how long are
• 8:29
  Speaker 4: they going to be there? I realized I don't know.
• 8:33
  Speaker 4: But the one guy's name is Hans and then another
• 8:36
  Speaker 4: times a person's name is I believe Jacob, and it
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: seems to.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: Be going very well.
• 8:44
  Speaker 4: I offer them sparkling water. There was no interest. Let
• 8:48
  Speaker 4: people don't like Lacroix.
• 8:50
  Speaker 3: It's shocking, right right, I for the longest time just
• 8:53
  Speaker 3: thought that's just a drink anyone will have. No, A
• 8:55
  Speaker 3: lot of people have no interest in having an essenced water.
• 8:59
  Speaker 4: No get oh yeah, but so that that's happened, I
• 9:03
  Speaker 4: went to the coffee shop. I know, my barista's coffee shop.
• 9:09
  Speaker 3: Oh says.
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: Pork es pork your soler problem.
• 9:18
  Speaker 5: Your silk and the same boy, yeah, hinthy ficacion.
• 9:25
  Speaker 4: I need to leave my neighborhood, but I will not.
• 9:30
  Speaker 4: H Anyways, they're lovely. I love that it's owned by
• 9:32
  Speaker 4: a Nicaraguan owner and they always have great staff currently
• 9:39
  Speaker 4: who's employed there. There's high turnover. So there's Kimmy, there's Paulina,
• 9:44
  Speaker 4: there's Anthony, there's Ethan. I'm gonna say that's it.
• 9:51
  Speaker 3: That's incredible that you remember that many of the names.
• 9:53
  Speaker 4: Oh my god, you gotta get to know everybody.
• 9:55
  Speaker 3: I mean, I do that at my coffee shop. But
• 9:56
  Speaker 3: I think I've gotten I know one of their names,
• 9:58
  Speaker 3: I know the owner's name and one employee's name. Okay,
• 10:01
  Speaker 3: but I've known all of them for so long at
• 10:03
  Speaker 3: this point.
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: Which coffee shop is it?
• 10:05
  Speaker 3: Found coffee? Have you ever been? Yeah?
• 10:07
  Speaker 4: You go Rock Bullard, Colorado.
• 10:09
  Speaker 3: Sky Colorado. The best staff in the world.
• 10:13
  Speaker 7: Right.
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: The coffee is so good and.
• 10:15
  Speaker 4: It makes I mean, I feel like I am doubling
• 10:19
  Speaker 4: down into you know, stand up isn't where I get
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: my self worth. Where I'm getting my self worth is
• 10:24
  Speaker 4: my abilities as a universal Walmart greeter to just introduce myself,
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: say hi, my name is Rea. What's your name? In
• 10:34
  Speaker 4: as awkward way as possible everywhere I go, just.
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: Kind of a roving greeter. That's a good, good attitude.
• 10:43
  Speaker 4: Yeah, And you know some people aren't into it, and
• 10:45
  Speaker 4: they go, you Christian, are you trying to sell me something. No,
• 10:50
  Speaker 4: but yeah, it helps keep things sort of interesting.
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: And you're pretty good at remembering names. I panic because
• 10:55
  Speaker 3: when I'm oh, no one terrible, But you just.
• 10:58
  Speaker 4: Like five names got put in a ton of efforts.
• 11:01
  Speaker 4: You got to remember. Oh, her name's Emmy. She works
• 11:05
  Speaker 4: at the taco place. But so you picture a golden
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: Emmy inside of a taco shell. Like, I'm doing the
• 11:13
  Speaker 4: real work on this. I'm not a genius.
• 11:16
  Speaker 3: That's kind of do they call that like the memory
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: palace or whatever like that? People are really good at
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: memorizing things that create a thing in their face head.
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: I guess I could do like the minimal level of that.
• 11:27
  Speaker 4: Oh sure, I mean, if you're interested in them.
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: It's to know people's names. What are we talking about?
• 11:34
  Speaker 7: Uh?
• 11:34
  Speaker 3: Can we get back to I'd like to talk about
• 11:37
  Speaker 3: the solar for a little bit longer. Okay, how did
• 11:39
  Speaker 3: the solar get introduced to your life? Because it's been
• 11:42
  Speaker 3: introduced to me several times by door to door salesman.
• 11:45
  Speaker 4: My friend Gary is a door to door salesman. Oh okay,
• 11:47
  Speaker 4: so I feel their pain. Oh my god. She says,
• 11:50
  Speaker 4: you go in, if you get let inside. Sometimes you're
• 11:54
  Speaker 4: there for two hours and the whole family is introduced
• 11:58
  Speaker 4: and some food is served, and you still don't get
• 12:00
  Speaker 4: a sale. So yeah, I talk to my friend Gary.
• 12:06
  Speaker 4: He no longer sells solar panels. He now sells motorcycles,
• 12:10
  Speaker 4: and only those motorcycles that are in a tripod like.
• 12:14
  Speaker 3: Three three wheeler. What is that called a three wheeler?
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: You cannot remember. But it's a terrible investment in the
• 12:21
  Speaker 4: long term. Anyways, Gary told me all about how great
• 12:24
  Speaker 4: it is. Turns out, at least in California, the laws
• 12:29
  Speaker 4: aren't as wonderful, Like it's not as great a deal
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: as it once was. But who cares if you're trying
• 12:34
  Speaker 4: to do something good for the environment. Although I know
• 12:36
  Speaker 4: the panel production is problematic. I'm getting into the weeds.
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: But what I did I didn't go through any of
• 12:44
  Speaker 4: the doorderder salesmen because from what I understand, and because
• 12:49
  Speaker 4: I now use contractors more, is it's kind of a
• 12:53
  Speaker 4: fly by night like companies come up and then they say, oh,
• 12:57
  Speaker 4: it's a lifetime guarantee, but then they're only around for
• 13:00
  Speaker 4: a year, which out of business.
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: I love it.
• 13:03
  Speaker 4: That's a great business plan. It's like so sharp. No,
• 13:09
  Speaker 4: I just got three people who had uh, we have
• 13:11
  Speaker 4: actual businesses in buildings and got one in our neighborhood.
• 13:16
  Speaker 4: And when in the building, I didn't haven't gone in
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: the building, but I got to meet the people. You know,
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: they help. There's people who work in a building, and
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: I felt like that was a good sign.
• 13:25
  Speaker 3: That is, Yeah, there's an address that you can go
• 13:28
  Speaker 3: back to should something bad happen. Yeah, like a wagon.
• 13:32
  Speaker 4: And also it's okay if it doesn't work out. Who
• 13:36
  Speaker 4: gives a shit? Like really, as material goods ever made
• 13:41
  Speaker 4: anybody happy? No, A house in California is like a
• 13:46
  Speaker 4: tulip in fourteenth century Amsterdam. It is not worth that
• 13:51
  Speaker 4: much money. It's a two bedroom ranch filled with vermin. Vermin?
• 13:58
  Speaker 4: I mean, are you rat free?
• 14:00
  Speaker 3: Oh my god? I hope.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: So.
• 14:02
  Speaker 3: There's nothing in the world that scares me more than
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: a rat.
• 14:05
  Speaker 4: Oh my, got it. You gotta have somebody check out
• 14:07
  Speaker 4: your house.
• 14:09
  Speaker 3: Will I will drive off a clip.
• 14:12
  Speaker 4: I'm gonna bet you fifty to fifty there's a rat
• 14:14
  Speaker 4: in your house.
• 14:15
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, Maria, what did you do?
• 14:19
  Speaker 6: Oh?
• 14:20
  Speaker 4: There's we Uh will live in our house for a
• 14:23
  Speaker 4: long time. It is so expensive and ongoing to get
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: rats removed that we had about five years where we
• 14:30
  Speaker 4: just lived with the rats and we heard them scramble
• 14:33
  Speaker 4: and scrap. They eat insulation. So when you get all
• 14:39
  Speaker 4: your rats removed, you have to have all your roofing
• 14:42
  Speaker 4: everything taken out and then everything sealed off and it talks.
• 14:46
  Speaker 4: It costs about ten grand. Oh yeah. Or this is
• 14:50
  Speaker 4: the other option. You can have a guy or a
• 14:53
  Speaker 4: lady come on a monthly basis and just see see
• 14:58
  Speaker 4: how many ones have died.
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: Check it out with traps.
• 15:01
  Speaker 4: Which I don't want to have to deal with a
• 15:03
  Speaker 4: guy every month because sometimes I do love anybody who
• 15:08
  Speaker 4: has a job. I appreciate that they're doing a job.
• 15:11
  Speaker 4: But sometimes, yeah, I don't want to do a lot
• 15:13
  Speaker 4: of face to face with I don't like being an employer.
• 15:18
  Speaker 4: It can be exhausting.
• 15:19
  Speaker 3: It's a lot of scheduling.
• 15:20
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it's scheduling like, oh, I can't come this Thursday.
• 15:25
  Speaker 4: The rats are working weekends. What do you what? Anyways,
• 15:29
  Speaker 4: so we did it all at once. Also, if you
• 15:32
  Speaker 4: don't can't tell from my voice, and you probably shouldn't
• 15:35
  Speaker 4: be able to tell us, that would be racist. I
• 15:38
  Speaker 4: am a white, older female who was given a full
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: ride scholarship by my father, who is a doctor. I
• 15:47
  Speaker 4: have been given all the benefits. That's why I had
• 15:50
  Speaker 4: ten thousand dollars to get rid of rats.
• 15:54
  Speaker 3: And did they guarantee that the rats aren't coming back?
• 15:56
  Speaker 6: Yes?
• 15:56
  Speaker 4: Like to guarantee. And this business has been around for
• 15:59
  Speaker 4: thirty year again. Could could close in a heartbeat. I'm
• 16:04
  Speaker 4: not It's okay if it doesn't work out. Do you
• 16:07
  Speaker 4: own your home?
• 16:08
  Speaker 5: Do rent?
• 16:08
  Speaker 3: I own it and I feel very fortunate, are you?
• 16:14
  Speaker 3: How did it happen? I saved money for a really
• 16:17
  Speaker 3: long time, that's and then got very lucky, insane, and
• 16:23
  Speaker 3: a lot of circumstances have come together for me to
• 16:27
  Speaker 3: I mean, I don't own the house. The bank owns
• 16:29
  Speaker 3: the house and they'll probably eventually take it from me.
• 16:33
  Speaker 3: But as of right now, I own the house and
• 16:35
  Speaker 3: pay a monthly mortgage. But you know, I started working
• 16:39
  Speaker 3: when I was about fifteen and never spent money on
• 16:41
  Speaker 3: anything ever. I then became a television writer by a
• 16:45
  Speaker 3: lot of luck.
• 16:46
  Speaker 5: I am loving this story, Bra.
• 16:48
  Speaker 3: And then in twenty twenty, right before it became impossible
• 16:52
  Speaker 3: to buy a house.
• 16:53
  Speaker 4: Did you buy it before the bubble?
• 16:54
  Speaker 3: Before me too? My god? Can you imagine I bought it.
• 16:59
  Speaker 4: I should not. I've been able to buy a house.
• 17:01
  Speaker 4: They gave me double mortgages so that because my credit
• 17:06
  Speaker 4: was not good. Sure, so they gave me one mortgage
• 17:10
  Speaker 4: on top of another one. So it was like a
• 17:11
  Speaker 4: credit card situation. I could not afford that mortgage, but
• 17:17
  Speaker 4: it was like thirty eight hundred dollars a month at
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: the point. At that point, and I was like, I
• 17:20
  Speaker 4: don't know how I'm gonna make this, and it weirdly
• 17:24
  Speaker 4: like a drug dealer, it does sometimes work out and
• 17:27
  Speaker 4: show a business that you get you in the lottery,
• 17:29
  Speaker 4: and so it was all right, but uh oh I
• 17:32
  Speaker 4: love it.
• 17:33
  Speaker 3: Good, good job, Yeah, I feel I mean I was
• 17:36
  Speaker 3: basically dragged into my boyfriend was like you should do this.
• 17:39
  Speaker 3: And then three weeks after we bought it, people beyond
• 17:43
  Speaker 3: far more successful than I couldn't buy a house. I
• 17:46
  Speaker 3: was like, oh my god, I guess so I got
• 17:48
  Speaker 3: lucky once it worked out.
• 17:51
  Speaker 4: Yeah, And I mean, as everything in life there it
• 17:55
  Speaker 4: holds a liminal space like is it good or is
• 17:58
  Speaker 4: it bad? You never know. Things turn on a dime.
• 18:02
  Speaker 4: That's my job as a fifteen year old lady. This
• 18:04
  Speaker 4: lady came up to me when I was just leaving
• 18:06
  Speaker 4: Minneapolis as a young lady, and she said she came
• 18:09
  Speaker 4: up and said, life turns on a dime. And I
• 18:15
  Speaker 4: think that's what I'm supposed to do. Just go up
• 18:18
  Speaker 4: to younger people from the chef say ship like that.
• 18:25
  Speaker 3: Can I ask you? You got a full ride scholarship to
• 18:27
  Speaker 3: college from my dad, my dear dad, because I was
• 18:31
  Speaker 3: there that.
• 18:32
  Speaker 4: The prettiest, smartest girl in the whole world. No, no,
• 18:39
  Speaker 4: I did get a I did get a scholarship, but
• 18:41
  Speaker 4: it was more like a you know, like a thousand
• 18:43
  Speaker 4: dollars leadership. You were a leader. That's not nothing you
• 18:49
  Speaker 4: mean you mean you talked a lot. That gal just
• 18:52
  Speaker 4: won't shut up.
• 18:55
  Speaker 3: I assume you're a good student though.
• 18:59
  Speaker 4: Sort of believe in my studies, like you know, went
• 19:02
  Speaker 4: real hard sometimes and sometimes just completely Uh yeah, vomited
• 19:07
  Speaker 4: all over the place. Didn't do very well. So yeah,
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: I got into Bates College, Okay in Maine, which is
• 19:14
  Speaker 4: in the middle of the road, very expensive liberal arts college.
• 19:17
  Speaker 4: I do not recommend it'llege it's a drinking school. Did
• 19:23
  Speaker 4: not know that as I was going in. Maybe that's
• 19:27
  Speaker 4: what all schools are.
• 19:30
  Speaker 3: I went to the University of Utah, which that's not
• 19:33
  Speaker 3: a drinking school not I mean, yeah, Utah. It's hard
• 19:36
  Speaker 3: to get to a drinking school, I suppose, uh, but yeah,
• 19:39
  Speaker 3: I guess the University of Utah is just kind of
• 19:41
  Speaker 3: a school.
• 19:43
  Speaker 4: Were you raised in the Mormond? I was, yeah, are
• 19:46
  Speaker 4: you not anymore?
• 19:47
  Speaker 3: I'm not anymore? My parents still are.
• 19:49
  Speaker 4: But but are they still talking to you?
• 19:51
  Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, they're so lovely.
• 19:53
  Speaker 4: Thank one Christ, I mean thank Christ for that the
• 19:58
  Speaker 4: very least.
• 20:00
  Speaker 3: Truly truly, No, they're really terrific because it could have gone.
• 20:03
  Speaker 3: You know, the Mormon Church is very bad with gay
• 20:05
  Speaker 3: issues in general, so the fact that my parents were
• 20:08
  Speaker 3: so great about it is terrific.
• 20:10
  Speaker 4: Nice good.
• 20:11
  Speaker 3: I went to the Mormon college for thirty minutes and
• 20:14
  Speaker 3: then went back to the University of Utah. There's a
• 20:16
  Speaker 3: Mormon college called Brigham Young University, so I know what
• 20:19
  Speaker 3: bring them? Yeah, And I enrolled there for a short
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: period thinking of their film program because it's very good technically,
• 20:26
  Speaker 3: but artistically I'm not so sure. So once I got in,
• 20:31
  Speaker 3: I started realizing, oh, what's happening here? I fled so
• 20:36
  Speaker 3: my you know, it took me like I think six seven,
• 20:39
  Speaker 3: four hundred years to get my bachelor's degree. It was
• 20:41
  Speaker 3: a very long stretch.
• 20:43
  Speaker 4: I had, Yeah, same experience. I switched school as a bunch.
• 20:47
  Speaker 4: I went to Bates and I went a year abroad
• 20:50
  Speaker 4: to Scotland, and then I was like, I don't know what.
• 20:53
  Speaker 4: I went to the University of Minnesota, transferred back because
• 20:56
  Speaker 4: I actually ended up going through an eating disorders treatment
• 20:59
  Speaker 4: program because yeah, academically I had was not good and
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: then also.
• 21:06
  Speaker 3: Had a problem with food.
• 21:07
  Speaker 4: What a white woman? How did it? Oh, I'm sorry,
• 21:14
  Speaker 4: I lost interest in my own narrative.
• 21:19
  Speaker 3: Well, I'm glad that we both had a really long
• 21:20
  Speaker 3: college experience.
• 21:22
  Speaker 8: Yes, it was.
• 21:24
  Speaker 4: I mean, I'm grateful for it because it was like
• 21:25
  Speaker 4: a good confinement system. I mean, it's like the army
• 21:29
  Speaker 4: or something where it's like somewhere you can go of
• 21:31
  Speaker 4: the army.
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: You will you could be killed.
• 21:35
  Speaker 4: Let's just remember that. But I am so grateful for
• 21:38
  Speaker 4: it because I did not I was terrified of adulthood
• 21:42
  Speaker 4: or the outside world, and it really gave me kept
• 21:45
  Speaker 4: me off the pipe in the pole.
• 21:46
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it's kind of a it is kind of like
• 21:49
  Speaker 3: a large daycare. It is allows you to kind of
• 21:54
  Speaker 3: slowly approach having responsibility.
• 21:57
  Speaker 4: It is, so it really should not be that expensive.
• 22:01
  Speaker 4: Like I just anyways, there's so many things I'd like
• 22:04
  Speaker 4: to change in the world.
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: How do we do it.
• 22:11
  Speaker 3: I've released all control.
• 22:12
  Speaker 4: I've just I've done doing my I go to my
• 22:15
  Speaker 4: neighborhood council.
• 22:17
  Speaker 3: Oh you do.
• 22:18
  Speaker 4: That's the limit of my.
• 22:21
  Speaker 3: That's more than I can do anything. That's more than
• 22:25
  Speaker 3: almost any other person.
• 22:27
  Speaker 4: Oh, I don't know. There's a lot of people, and
• 22:30
  Speaker 4: it does have some effect. When I lived in Highland Park,
• 22:33
  Speaker 4: there was a seven eleven that wanted to open up
• 22:36
  Speaker 4: on my block and I was like, there's fucking two
• 22:39
  Speaker 4: seven elevens with it like a thousand feet here, what
• 22:42
  Speaker 4: the hell? And so I and some friends went, no,
• 22:46
  Speaker 4: seven eleven. It is effective.
• 22:48
  Speaker 3: It's amazing.
• 22:50
  Speaker 4: Democracy does work. Uh sometimes, what were.
• 22:55
  Speaker 3: They there are two seven elevens so nearby? What a
• 22:59
  Speaker 3: third have? Even? What's what's the service it would have provided?
• 23:02
  Speaker 4: I don't know. I think it's like a Starbucks or
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: something where it's like just one more. Yeah. I think
• 23:08
  Speaker 4: it just creates the addiction of something within walking disiness.
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: Because there's there's tons of liquor stores in the island parks.
• 23:15
  Speaker 4: Maybe they're trying to steal from the liquor store trade
• 23:17
  Speaker 4: or anyways more. But I love a liquor. Liquor stores
• 23:22
  Speaker 4: at least there's some you feel like it's neighborhood. Like
• 23:26
  Speaker 4: you go, oh, there's Psycho and there's the van that
• 23:31
  Speaker 4: has a prostitution ring going out of it. It's a
• 23:34
  Speaker 4: van and it's open for business.
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: That's two business. It's too small businesses. Oh wow, Well
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: there's something else we need to get to.
• 23:43
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 23:45
  Speaker 3: I was really excited to have you here today, two
• 23:47
  Speaker 3: hundredth episode, Maria Bamford. I mean I.
• 23:51
  Speaker 4: Brought you a gift and I don't mean to put
• 23:53
  Speaker 4: pressure on you, but.
• 23:54
  Speaker 3: You're just diving.
• 23:55
  Speaker 4: Did you bring me a gift? Or can I take
• 23:59
  Speaker 4: a planting?
• 24:00
  Speaker 3: You've got to take a planting?
• 24:03
  Speaker 4: Peace, I'll take a clipping of that pink plant. And
• 24:06
  Speaker 4: I mean, why do I have to get something out
• 24:08
  Speaker 4: of everything? But I feel like I do. I do
• 24:10
  Speaker 4: like to get stuff.
• 24:11
  Speaker 3: We've had guests take a clipping before, really take a clipping.
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: Grow it at home. What does that propagate? I certainly
• 24:18
  Speaker 3: will put it in a glass of water for a while.
• 24:20
  Speaker 3: Eventually the roots come out and you're planting it. In
• 24:23
  Speaker 3: the garden.
• 24:23
  Speaker 4: I'll give some to my friend. I'm going to go
• 24:25
  Speaker 4: lunch with my friend Courtney, and I'll give her some too.
• 24:27
  Speaker 3: There you go.
• 24:28
  Speaker 8: We're spreading I can't take that much.
• 24:29
  Speaker 4: We're spreading love like an agrarian.
• 24:33
  Speaker 3: Yes, okay, so you're just claiming. I mean, you brought
• 24:35
  Speaker 3: a gift. Yes, Should I open it here on the podcast?
• 24:38
  Speaker 3: Of course?
• 24:42
  Speaker 6: No.
• 24:42
  Speaker 4: It is very very much sincere.
• 24:47
  Speaker 3: Okay.
• 24:47
  Speaker 4: I love that and authentic comes from the heart, and
• 24:50
  Speaker 4: it is something I truly believe the message of.
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: So just that said, Okay, and I just to clear
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: the air even more, I'm hanging by a thread at
• 25:00
  Speaker 3: all times emotionally. I mean I might just I mean,
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: maybe I'm just gonna end up bowling. Who knows sincerity?
• 25:05
  Speaker 4: Well, I mean, I don't know if I went that deep.
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: But I'm telling you.
• 25:11
  Speaker 4: I'm read the beginning.
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: Okay, I've opened it.
• 25:15
  Speaker 6: Uh.
• 25:17
  Speaker 4: Your front, which, yeah, you got to say that.
• 25:20
  Speaker 3: Part some excitement hited and so yeah, it's a little
• 25:23
  Speaker 3: piece of lined paper folded.
• 25:24
  Speaker 4: Up with paper that I wrote out in my car
• 25:29
  Speaker 4: right outside your house.
• 25:32
  Speaker 3: Okay, so we're opening. We're opening. Oh, this is very nice.
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: It says you are doing great love, Maria Bamford with
• 25:41
  Speaker 3: your is this your signature?
• 25:43
  Speaker 4: That's my signature? And then it's a heart, giant heart heart,
• 25:47
  Speaker 4: And I wasn't sure is that too cold? Because I
• 25:50
  Speaker 4: used my full name. I should have just said.
• 25:52
  Speaker 3: Maria clinical but tell me why you uh the purpose
• 25:57
  Speaker 3: of this gift?
• 25:58
  Speaker 4: There is so much pressure in our society as far
• 26:03
  Speaker 4: as professional standards and work, like everyone's, oh god, what
• 26:08
  Speaker 4: are you hustling on? What do you what do you?
• 26:11
  Speaker 4: Are you grinding? Are you marketing? Where's your merch when
• 26:16
  Speaker 4: clearly there's so much evidence that shows that what brings
• 26:22
  Speaker 4: people joy is relationships and nature dogs happy. It has
• 26:31
  Speaker 4: nothing to do with your job. But anyways, I I
• 26:35
  Speaker 4: know you're doing a great job, and so I just
• 26:38
  Speaker 4: want to send that message out of like relax.
• 26:44
  Speaker 3: I really appreciate that. It's a strange time, especially in
• 26:47
  Speaker 3: Los Angeles, because everything, the entire entertainment industry seems to
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: be collapsing. So it's it is kind of a fraught,
• 26:55
  Speaker 3: scary time in life where when you can frequently feel like,
• 26:58
  Speaker 3: oh I'm doing something wrong.
• 27:00
  Speaker 4: Oh there's always I mean, at least every person I
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: ever talked to who does well unless of course there's
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: the CEO of something. They're like, I really enjoy it.
• 27:14
  Speaker 4: Would you like to share my hot nuts? That's what
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: you get in first class, you get hot nuts.
• 27:20
  Speaker 5: I've only written it a couple of times, but it's
• 27:23
  Speaker 5: a hot not.
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: Is it a mix or peanuts.
• 27:27
  Speaker 4: Mix hot nuts? They put a tablecloth down. Anyways, everybody
• 27:32
  Speaker 4: is scared, and I want to say, let's have some
• 27:35
  Speaker 4: empathy for the oligarchs. Have you ever heard sometimes extremely
• 27:41
  Speaker 4: wealthy people. I've heard them worry aloud about money, which
• 27:44
  Speaker 4: is so confusing. Yeah, so I don't think it goes
• 27:49
  Speaker 4: away once you have a shit ton of money. I
• 27:51
  Speaker 4: don't think that's the answer. I've heard a person say
• 27:55
  Speaker 4: to me to my face.
• 27:57
  Speaker 5: We wanted to give to public radio this year, but
• 28:01
  Speaker 5: we've got the girls in private school, and then we've
• 28:04
  Speaker 5: got the kitchen being redone on the home in Italy. Oh.
• 28:09
  Speaker 4: I can't listen to any more of this romance novel
• 28:12
  Speaker 4: until there's been a murder, because I don't care about
• 28:15
  Speaker 4: any of these characters. But I had some dear friends,
• 28:19
  Speaker 4: as you do sometimes in Los Angeles. All of a sudden,
• 28:22
  Speaker 4: you'll have some friends who shoot off like rock chips
• 28:25
  Speaker 4: into stardom. So these friends were living in a black
• 28:31
  Speaker 4: obelisk above the sea, and I thought everything was going great,
• 28:37
  Speaker 4: as you do from Instagram reels. And they showed up
• 28:42
  Speaker 4: on my front door and said, we've lost everything. The
• 28:46
  Speaker 4: sheriff has locked us out of our house and all
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: of our accounts. Can we stay with you what for
• 28:53
  Speaker 4: the time being? And I said, of course, come on in.
• 28:56
  Speaker 4: Help yourself to some old vegan pizza that is covered
• 28:59
  Speaker 4: in bans and corn and it's damp with a arugula.
• 29:02
  Speaker 4: I didn't want it when I ordered it. No, I
• 29:07
  Speaker 4: think shit could happen at any level where it's like
• 29:10
  Speaker 4: you just fuck up and you know.
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: So.
• 29:13
  Speaker 4: I just don't think having more is a thing that
• 29:16
  Speaker 4: that that's going to bring people a piece. I mean,
• 29:18
  Speaker 4: it certainly hasn't been the case. Like I used to
• 29:22
  Speaker 4: live in a hippie cooperative. Great times had great times then. Sure,
• 29:26
  Speaker 4: I had great times now, But I had great times
• 29:28
  Speaker 4: then I bawled. I made ten dollars a day busking
• 29:33
  Speaker 4: for change while playing a musical instrument poorly on the
• 29:38
  Speaker 4: streets of Minneapolis. The violin. I was very shy, so
• 29:42
  Speaker 4: I mostly tried to play in parking structures, not a
• 29:46
  Speaker 4: lot of walk through business. At one point, I was
• 29:50
  Speaker 4: a year late in my rent and the hippies had
• 29:54
  Speaker 4: to sit me down.
• 29:55
  Speaker 3: Go listen, man seriously.
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: Talking.
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: You guys do not have any idea what I am doing.
• 30:04
  Speaker 4: I'm an artist, but I was happy then. I'm happy
• 30:08
  Speaker 4: like I just. I think healthcare and a shelter and food,
• 30:13
  Speaker 4: of course add to your level of happiness, but beyond
• 30:16
  Speaker 4: a certain point it doesn't seem to affective. I've dated
• 30:18
  Speaker 4: a ton of dudes who were very wealthy, huge anxiety
• 30:23
  Speaker 4: and assholes about money, like not generous, weird about their cars.
• 30:29
  Speaker 4: My husband, one of the main things I loved about
• 30:30
  Speaker 4: him was that he showed up in his car, which
• 30:33
  Speaker 4: was a super No what was it, Saturn? Saturn crushed
• 30:38
  Speaker 4: a bit on the side. I said, do you own it?
• 30:42
  Speaker 9: Outright?
• 30:42
  Speaker 4: He said, yes, I do.
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: Oh.
• 30:49
  Speaker 4: He also knew what was going on with his finances,
• 30:52
  Speaker 4: like he's like I am. I think it was almost
• 30:55
  Speaker 4: sixty thousand dollars in debt. That's what I have and
• 30:59
  Speaker 4: some times I can't always eat a lot, and so
• 31:02
  Speaker 4: I get kind of irritable because he just didn't he
• 31:06
  Speaker 4: didn't have a lot of money and I'm like, right
• 31:08
  Speaker 4: that and and he had a good life, like and
• 31:12
  Speaker 4: he knew what was happening. Like some people with money,
• 31:16
  Speaker 4: they're all like my ex wife or yeah, just having
• 31:21
  Speaker 4: I don't know, I'm just going.
• 31:23
  Speaker 3: Off now, but something worth going off.
• 31:26
  Speaker 4: I doubt that it brings people's happiness in the long run.
• 31:32
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's largely true. Like there's a base
• 31:36
  Speaker 3: level of security that's nice to have, like with knowing
• 31:39
  Speaker 3: you can see a doctor, that kind of thing, and
• 31:41
  Speaker 3: it's a shame that not everybody can do that. But
• 31:43
  Speaker 3: beyond that you start, it's a never ending void obviously.
• 31:48
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I'm also could be wrong.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: I don't think you're wrong. I know a lot of
• 31:55
  Speaker 3: people that are supremely rich and they're still completely dissatisfied
• 31:59
  Speaker 3: with it. Everything so mean or like what doesn't really help.
• 32:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, my husband and I would give eleven percent of
• 32:09
  Speaker 4: our income to charity, which is one percent better than
• 32:12
  Speaker 4: the Muslims, Christians or Jews, Mormons. Really, we're killing it
• 32:19
  Speaker 4: with the Mormos. We're gonna make it into every fucking
• 32:23
  Speaker 4: heaven that there is.
• 32:26
  Speaker 3: You're going to bust right through the door.
• 32:27
  Speaker 4: Bus through the door Oh, where are all the sweets?
• 32:35
  Speaker 3: What charities are you?
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: Just mostly the Downtown Women's Center, which is for housing
• 32:40
  Speaker 4: in Los Angeles. There's the skid Row neighborhood, about fifty
• 32:43
  Speaker 4: thousand people who live on the street down Down LA.
• 32:47
  Speaker 4: Obviously half of those are women. Downtown Women's Center is
• 32:53
  Speaker 4: has created a lot of affordable housing, clearly not enough
• 32:57
  Speaker 4: because there are so many people. Yep, do you live
• 33:01
  Speaker 4: with roommates on a Lisa?
• 33:03
  Speaker 8: Yes, I'm very fortunate and I get to live alone.
• 33:05
  Speaker 2: Oh delightful.
• 33:08
  Speaker 4: We had an experiment with creating affordable housing. We invited
• 33:12
  Speaker 4: two comedians to live with us because we have two
• 33:14
  Speaker 4: extra bedrooms. Sure, I was, yes, in my backyard, but
• 33:21
  Speaker 4: then my backyard OOO smell a lot like pot And
• 33:27
  Speaker 4: I was like, and one of the comics kept having hookups,
• 33:32
  Speaker 4: at which I totally get. You're in your thirties, right,
• 33:34
  Speaker 4: you gotta get things oiled and loobed and uh, but like,
• 33:39
  Speaker 4: at least once a week there'd be a guy walking
• 33:41
  Speaker 4: around our succulents going Carmen, Carmen at like midnight.
• 33:51
  Speaker 3: I think, if you have roommates, the hookup you've got
• 33:54
  Speaker 3: to You've got to have that in control. That's the
• 33:58
  Speaker 3: basic level of respect for the well.
• 34:01
  Speaker 4: And they were lovely people. They're just in their thirties.
• 34:03
  Speaker 4: They're a different place in life. You know, we're grumpy
• 34:06
  Speaker 4: in our fifties, like we go to bet at eight,
• 34:09
  Speaker 4: you know, and uh, yeah it was it was. I
• 34:12
  Speaker 4: think we're thinking of getting people who are more our
• 34:16
  Speaker 4: age instead on the West.
• 34:18
  Speaker 3: See know either of the comedians very well before they
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: moved in. No, okay, well there's a problem. That's that's
• 34:24
  Speaker 3: part of the problem. The very funny How long did
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: they live with you?
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: About a year?
• 34:29
  Speaker 3: Okay, that's a good chat.
• 34:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it was a good chunk of time. And then
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: we said, this has been an experiment. We told them
• 34:36
  Speaker 4: in the beginning, we're just going to see how it went. Okay,
• 34:38
  Speaker 4: and we pay them back all their rent money. Wow,
• 34:41
  Speaker 4: so we're essentially acted as a savings account. So then
• 34:46
  Speaker 4: they could have all their because I wanted to see
• 34:48
  Speaker 4: what it was like, and I also I didn't know
• 34:50
  Speaker 4: if I would be a good person for people to
• 34:52
  Speaker 4: live with. And they're also co workers, so I don't
• 34:55
  Speaker 4: want it to be a shitty situation in any way.
• 34:59
  Speaker 4: So we gave all their money back and also they
• 35:02
  Speaker 4: could have said we're not leaving. That is a law
• 35:06
  Speaker 4: in Los Angeles, as you can say yeah, no, no, no,
• 35:10
  Speaker 4: are not going to go. So they were very kind
• 35:13
  Speaker 4: to let us change our minds.
• 35:15
  Speaker 3: Well that's uh. Were there any upsides to it? Did
• 35:18
  Speaker 3: you enjoy spending time in the house?
• 35:20
  Speaker 4: Okay, yes, Well it felt useful, like, oh my gosh,
• 35:25
  Speaker 4: we're creating a he affordable housing in Los Angeles because
• 35:27
  Speaker 4: there is it just sucks here. You I have so
• 35:31
  Speaker 4: many friends who've had to leave because it's unbelievably expensive.
• 35:34
  Speaker 4: Even if you have just a regular full time job,
• 35:37
  Speaker 4: a job as you know, seventy grand a year, you
• 35:40
  Speaker 4: cannot afford going bedroom or say yeah, at least that's
• 35:44
  Speaker 4: what I've heard. Yes, that felt good. Also, we had
• 35:47
  Speaker 4: a lot of comedian parties. That was also fun. Effect
• 35:50
  Speaker 4: to meet a lot of comedians. I got to feel
• 35:52
  Speaker 4: like I knew more catchphrases or the new words that
• 35:56
  Speaker 4: the kids are using. E vince is that something?
• 36:02
  Speaker 6: Uh?
• 36:03
  Speaker 4: It was a neat experience and I learned I think
• 36:07
  Speaker 4: the humility that I'm not as warm and loving as
• 36:12
  Speaker 4: I'd hoped. I always like to think of myself as
• 36:15
  Speaker 4: a I don't know why I'm going to say this
• 36:17
  Speaker 4: person's name Mama cass.
• 36:19
  Speaker 3: Oh a really warm.
• 36:23
  Speaker 4: She sounds nice. But yeah, I give shoulder based hugs.
• 36:28
  Speaker 4: That's the level of my maternal Uh yeah. But there
• 36:34
  Speaker 4: was lots of positives, lots of barbecues, pool parties.
• 36:38
  Speaker 3: I think it's hard to be warm and welcoming all
• 36:41
  Speaker 3: day every day. Yeah, that takes an enormous amount of energy.
• 36:44
  Speaker 3: Sometimes when you're home, you're just you can't You're just
• 36:47
  Speaker 3: for yourself. So it's hard when there's someone who's not
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: a partner. Yes, yes, like I can't give you everything
• 36:55
  Speaker 3: I have all the time.
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: Yes, it's true.
• 36:57
  Speaker 3: So I don't think that that's your fault.
• 36:59
  Speaker 4: And it was fun, yeah, just to they were Oh,
• 37:02
  Speaker 4: this is the other thing super enthusiastic and passionate about comedy,
• 37:07
  Speaker 4: which is that's just so great, you know, because sometimes
• 37:10
  Speaker 4: people get when they get to my age. I mean,
• 37:17
  Speaker 4: I'm trying to get booked in Chicago. These motherfuckers want,
• 37:20
  Speaker 4: you know, was like, and these people are just like,
• 37:25
  Speaker 4: I just get it open, Mike. You know, it's really energizing.
• 37:30
  Speaker 4: So was I a vampire? Was I like a vampire
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: sucking off.
• 37:34
  Speaker 3: The blood of the yard, taking advantage of these people.
• 37:37
  Speaker 3: Oh god, is there anything you do enjoy spending money on?
• 37:43
  Speaker 3: Like yes, coffee? Coffee? Okay?
• 37:46
  Speaker 4: I also loved big tips.
• 37:48
  Speaker 3: Oh wo.
• 37:49
  Speaker 4: I tip people because people are not being paid enough
• 37:52
  Speaker 4: to live in Los Angeles. I want to make sure
• 37:54
  Speaker 4: everybody's making at least forty bucks an hour. I know
• 37:57
  Speaker 4: that's not even a living wage from what I've read,
• 38:02
  Speaker 4: but trying my best.
• 38:05
  Speaker 3: So when you're spending a lot on coffee, you're also
• 38:07
  Speaker 3: giving a big tip for yes.
• 38:08
  Speaker 4: Yes, So it's like I'm also I'm talking to them
• 38:12
  Speaker 4: with SE's emotional work they're doing. They didn't ask, they
• 38:15
  Speaker 4: didn't sign up for that.
• 38:16
  Speaker 3: Oh yeah, that's a big part of a tip.
• 38:19
  Speaker 4: I also pay the crowd if I talk to people.
• 38:21
  Speaker 4: I venmo people one hundred bucks if they talk to
• 38:26
  Speaker 4: me out of the crowd, because that is it's un
• 38:28
  Speaker 4: it's emotional burden that I'm giving them that they have
• 38:32
  Speaker 4: to talk to me.
• 38:34
  Speaker 3: I think it's really fair and not a bad deal.
• 38:37
  Speaker 4: And I'm an old lady. I don't have any descendants
• 38:41
  Speaker 4: and I have I am wealthy, so no worries.
• 38:45
  Speaker 3: How are the dogs doing? Thank you?
• 38:49
  Speaker 4: Lovey chi wah wah, pug named Muffin is very popular,
• 38:53
  Speaker 4: and it's like one of those things where you're just like,
• 38:55
  Speaker 4: I don't know where my daughter gets this.
• 38:59
  Speaker 8: I no, she's not my daughter.
• 39:02
  Speaker 4: And then Max is an older pug about fourteen. You
• 39:06
  Speaker 4: can't see or hear. Both of them are from the
• 39:09
  Speaker 4: Pug Nation place, which has if you're in La area
• 39:14
  Speaker 4: and looking for a pug, they got a warehouse full
• 39:16
  Speaker 4: of pugs looking for a home. And what they have
• 39:22
  Speaker 4: a lot of are pug mermaids. That's pugs who have
• 39:25
  Speaker 4: lost the use of their back legs. Oh wow, so
• 39:28
  Speaker 4: they have little wheelies in the back. So precious. Pugs
• 39:33
  Speaker 4: are so sweet. And the great thing about a pug
• 39:35
  Speaker 4: mermaid is that because they can't feel their backs, you
• 39:39
  Speaker 4: express them when it's convenient to you.
• 39:41
  Speaker 3: Oh wow, it's like a frosting bag.
• 39:45
  Speaker 4: Wow, this is what was told to me. But anyways,
• 39:49
  Speaker 4: they were trying to sell me on a.
• 39:51
  Speaker 3: Mermaid, and that was like one of the perks.
• 39:55
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes, okay, is that it's very easy and now
• 39:58
  Speaker 4: then you don't have to wait. You have to wait.
• 40:01
  Speaker 4: Max does a pretty long walk before he decides where
• 40:04
  Speaker 4: to poop. But now with a mermaid, you just squeeze
• 40:09
  Speaker 4: it out on your schedule.
• 40:12
  Speaker 3: How old is Muffin?
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: Muffin's about four?
• 40:15
  Speaker 3: Oh so just a baby.
• 40:16
  Speaker 4: She's just a baby.
• 40:17
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 40:17
  Speaker 4: We we've had a lot of old pugs, so we
• 40:20
  Speaker 4: all got from the pug nation and so my husband said,
• 40:24
  Speaker 4: can we get a young woman now? And so we did.
• 40:29
  Speaker 4: But I felt bad about that because there's so many
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: older lovely doggies. But yeah, I've never had a young dog.
• 40:37
  Speaker 4: And so she likes to fetch and she's interested, you know,
• 40:40
  Speaker 4: and that's.
• 40:41
  Speaker 3: Active and she's active. How old was she when you
• 40:43
  Speaker 3: got her?
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: Uh?
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: Too? I think, yeah, so it's good. I do. Do
• 40:50
  Speaker 4: you think about having children either? Interview?
• 40:52
  Speaker 3: I certainly don't, don Lee ste.
• 40:54
  Speaker 7: I'm still up in the air about it. But I've
• 40:56
  Speaker 7: got two cats and they feel like a handful enough
• 40:59
  Speaker 7: for right now.
• 41:00
  Speaker 9: What are your cat's names.
• 41:02
  Speaker 7: Buster, who's ten, and Nigel, who's eight months new to
• 41:06
  Speaker 7: the family.
• 41:07
  Speaker 8: New to the family in the top.
• 41:09
  Speaker 4: What are their personalities?
• 41:11
  Speaker 9: Like Buster I describe as a fifty five year old
• 41:17
  Speaker 9: man but living in nineteen fifty five, who is a
• 41:21
  Speaker 9: science professor and wears round spectacles with a bow tie
• 41:25
  Speaker 9: and a pocket protector and still.
• 41:26
  Speaker 8: Lives with his mother.
• 41:27
  Speaker 7: He is also bisexual, and Nigel is a little uh
• 41:34
  Speaker 7: surfer bro black cat. Wow yeah, oh, very scary British
• 41:39
  Speaker 7: names like brush the girl exactly.
• 41:44
  Speaker 4: I love a fully realized uh what is that called?
• 41:47
  Speaker 4: When you domorized?
• 41:52
  Speaker 3: Are they getting along?
• 41:55
  Speaker 8: And sometimes yes? Sometimes No. Buster is much older, so
• 41:58
  Speaker 8: he doesn't want to play as much. Okay, and right now.
• 42:02
  Speaker 7: Everything is prey with Nigel, so he just want every
• 42:05
  Speaker 7: time Buster moves his tail, it's like attack time.
• 42:09
  Speaker 3: That's a tough situation.
• 42:10
  Speaker 7: Yeah, but they you know, they're mostly in tolerance mode
• 42:14
  Speaker 7: and that's all I can really ask for.
• 42:16
  Speaker 3: At this point.
• 42:16
  Speaker 8: So okay, yeah, that's not bad, and they play together sometimes.
• 42:20
  Speaker 4: You sound like a wonderful mother.
• 42:21
  Speaker 8: Well I appreciate that. Thank you for saying that.
• 42:24
  Speaker 4: Have you watched Jackson Galaxies my cat from Hell?
• 42:28
  Speaker 7: I have not watched that, but I've watched many, many
• 42:31
  Speaker 7: of his videos.
• 42:32
  Speaker 3: Yes, I forget he has just like YouTube videos.
• 42:34
  Speaker 9: Yeah, he's wonderful.
• 42:37
  Speaker 4: I've watched all forty episodes that I could find, and
• 42:41
  Speaker 4: he only couldn't help one cat because that cat had
• 42:44
  Speaker 4: a brain injury. Oh and he just said, and he
• 42:48
  Speaker 4: got teary eyed, and he's.
• 42:49
  Speaker 3: Like, oh you can do is mids What was the
• 42:53
  Speaker 3: cat doing?
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: Being mean and stuff like that. But if you have
• 42:57
  Speaker 4: a cat who has problems, all you gotta do is
• 43:00
  Speaker 4: with them forty five minutes a day with some stuff,
• 43:02
  Speaker 4: put them on levels, give them a little outside zone
• 43:05
  Speaker 4: that they can cruise around it, and make eye contact
• 43:09
  Speaker 4: with them with blinking.
• 43:10
  Speaker 3: Oh I forget that cats can kind of communicate via blink. Yeah,
• 43:14
  Speaker 3: it's amazing.
• 43:16
  Speaker 4: Unless they have a traumatic brain injury.
• 43:19
  Speaker 3: Then have you ever owned a cat?
• 43:22
  Speaker 4: I am a little allergic to some so I but
• 43:26
  Speaker 4: I love kitties. I do, I do, I do. I
• 43:28
  Speaker 4: love a kitty. I will pick them up. I especially
• 43:31
  Speaker 4: love an overweight cat.
• 43:32
  Speaker 3: Oh, I know, isn't that tempting when people are like,
• 43:35
  Speaker 3: I'm trying to get the cat to lose weight, don't
• 43:38
  Speaker 3: I mean, it's horrible because it's bad for the cat,
• 43:41
  Speaker 3: But is it?
• 43:42
  Speaker 4: Is it?
• 43:44
  Speaker 3: It's getting all the attention in the world and it's
• 43:47
  Speaker 3: just getting to eat all day. I mean, they have
• 43:50
  Speaker 3: a limited time on earth regardless.
• 43:53
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I eat ice cream
• 43:56
  Speaker 4: almost every day, and I'm sure that's shortening my life span.
• 44:01
  Speaker 4: But look, but the smiles, the smiles.
• 44:04
  Speaker 3: What time of day are you eating ice cream?
• 44:06
  Speaker 4: Morning? As soon as I wake up?
• 44:09
  Speaker 3: Is that true?
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: Yes, Heat up the hot fudge in the microwave, put
• 44:13
  Speaker 4: a scoop of peanut butter down the middle. It's so good.
• 44:18
  Speaker 4: It's actually it's a great reason to get up.
• 44:23
  Speaker 3: What flavor of ice cream?
• 44:25
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh. I like things with chunks in it.
• 44:28
  Speaker 4: But of course I can make my own chunks by
• 44:30
  Speaker 4: you know. Sometimes you can put a spray a Swiss
• 44:33
  Speaker 4: miss cocoa up top. Oh interesting, Yeah, like it's cinnamon.
• 44:37
  Speaker 4: Put like a powder on top, powder on top, Like
• 44:40
  Speaker 4: I'm a boba master. But I love, you know, like
• 44:45
  Speaker 4: a rich creamy. I love a Ben and Jerry. Yeah,
• 44:48
  Speaker 4: anything with a lot of nuggets.
• 44:51
  Speaker 3: I like those very basic chocolate peanut butter flavors. I
• 44:54
  Speaker 3: don't need to go any further than that.
• 44:56
  Speaker 4: Okay, you don't like a ridge.
• 45:00
  Speaker 3: I love a ridge. I'm just like, as far as
• 45:02
  Speaker 3: flavors go, like the classic. Okay, combinations that are just
• 45:06
  Speaker 3: immediately satisfying. I don't have to think about it.
• 45:08
  Speaker 4: I understand that I'm not as open to rosemary or
• 45:12
  Speaker 4: when they say, oh, it's a daisy leaves plus dandelion.
• 45:18
  Speaker 4: It's like, oh that's it's just no or it tastes
• 45:23
  Speaker 4: like vanilla. But I know anyways, that's a business model
• 45:27
  Speaker 4: that I know has been successful.
• 45:29
  Speaker 3: Now it's very successful. Yeah, ice cream flavors that are
• 45:32
  Speaker 3: more of a dare or an experience than a treat.
• 45:35
  Speaker 4: A meat low flavored with gushers.
• 45:44
  Speaker 3: Well, I have this lovely gift. I'll have to frame this.
• 45:46
  Speaker 3: It's a beautiful little low yet no pressure and please
• 45:49
  Speaker 3: feel zero pressure. Okay, good, absolutely no pressure. But thank
• 45:52
  Speaker 3: you for this.
• 45:53
  Speaker 6: Uh.
• 45:54
  Speaker 3: I think we should play a game. Okay, great, We're
• 45:56
  Speaker 3: gonna play a game called Gift Your a Curse. Okay,
• 45:58
  Speaker 3: I need a number between ten for me four. Okay,
• 46:01
  Speaker 3: I have to do to get our game pieces. Some
• 46:03
  Speaker 3: light calculating right now, so you can recommend something, you
• 46:07
  Speaker 3: can promote something, you can do whatever you want. I'll
• 46:08
  Speaker 3: be right back.
• 46:09
  Speaker 4: Okay. Well, why don't you check out my friend jackieicasions
• 46:13
  Speaker 4: a comedy special which is it's ten minutes long, it's
• 46:16
  Speaker 4: through the back. It's called Looking Back, and it's a
• 46:19
  Speaker 4: comedy special done through the back of a car camera.
• 46:22
  Speaker 4: So she's doing jokes all about cars while someone has
• 46:26
  Speaker 4: the break on a ninety two preus held so it
• 46:32
  Speaker 4: doesn't become a snuff film. Check that out? What else
• 46:36
  Speaker 4: can you check out? Hey? Why don't you vote or
• 46:39
  Speaker 4: participate in your own neighborhood council? Google it in your
• 46:43
  Speaker 4: zip code. There's something going on, have a voice. Why
• 46:46
  Speaker 4: don't you speak up? Oh my god, do you want
• 46:48
  Speaker 4: to be on a gang prevention committee?
• 46:52
  Speaker 3: I bet there's.
• 46:53
  Speaker 4: A I bet there's another gang prevention committee that started
• 46:57
  Speaker 4: up and you have to decide which one is gonna
• 47:01
  Speaker 4: win that? All right?
• 47:03
  Speaker 3: Okay, tur force between community.
• 47:07
  Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, that totally happened in Island Park and
• 47:09
  Speaker 4: it made me laugh so hard.
• 47:13
  Speaker 3: Those are great recommendations. Yes, everybody should be participating in
• 47:17
  Speaker 3: some way. Yeah, I mean something you have a problem
• 47:19
  Speaker 3: with and try to and not well.
• 47:21
  Speaker 4: Don't put a lot of half ascet show up with
• 47:26
  Speaker 4: your earbuds in you just be there, wear net hat,
• 47:31
  Speaker 4: we're down over your face like people are putting two
• 47:35
  Speaker 4: Oh oh that. If I went, I'd have to participate
• 47:38
  Speaker 4: and be good at no, be super shit at everything.
• 47:45
  Speaker 4: It just do it.
• 47:47
  Speaker 3: Do you know what something I haven't done in a
• 47:48
  Speaker 3: long time that I recommend people do? Service wise, is
• 47:52
  Speaker 3: there's a place in downtown LA where you chop They
• 47:56
  Speaker 3: bring in vegetables that were left over from restaurants or whatever,
• 47:59
  Speaker 3: and you get to just chop up vegetables for hours
• 48:01
  Speaker 3: and they you know, put them in meal kits and
• 48:03
  Speaker 3: it's so satisfying, lovely, really contributing to something.
• 48:08
  Speaker 4: For sure that sounds wonderful.
• 48:10
  Speaker 3: And you just get to sit there and kind of
• 48:12
  Speaker 3: meditate while you're chopping up romain or what have you.
• 48:15
  Speaker 9: Do.
• 48:15
  Speaker 4: You chitchat with people if.
• 48:16
  Speaker 3: You bring a friend, or I guess you could chitchat
• 48:19
  Speaker 3: with other people. Maybe that's not exactly what I would
• 48:21
  Speaker 3: if I were there alone. Maybe I'll be forced into that.
• 48:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah, I do some food packing with uh there's one
• 48:30
  Speaker 4: in Pasadena that I do, but it's like heavy lifting
• 48:33
  Speaker 4: stuff that there's no chit chat, say fack, kind of
• 48:37
  Speaker 4: sad ab us so. And then I started working at
• 48:38
  Speaker 4: the La Food Bank and that's more chit chat. But
• 48:41
  Speaker 4: the music is so loud.
• 48:43
  Speaker 3: Oh no, and it ways.
• 48:46
  Speaker 8: I love chitchat, is what I'm trying to say.
• 48:50
  Speaker 3: Okay, this is how we play gift or a curse.
• 48:52
  Speaker 3: I'm going to name three things you're gonna tell me
• 48:55
  Speaker 3: if they are a gift or a curse. Okay, and
• 48:57
  Speaker 3: why okay, and then I'll tell you if you're right
• 49:00
  Speaker 3: or wrong okay, because there are correct answers. Oh oh wow, Okay.
• 49:05
  Speaker 3: This first one is a listener suggestion from someone named Emily.
• 49:09
  Speaker 3: Emily gift or a curse Christmas cards with a long
• 49:13
  Speaker 3: update letter about what they've been doing all year.
• 49:16
  Speaker 4: Love it? Gift?
• 49:18
  Speaker 3: Why?
• 49:18
  Speaker 4: I want to know who has cancer? I want to
• 49:21
  Speaker 4: know who's, you know, really achieving something to gain the
• 49:26
  Speaker 4: attention of their mother. I want to know who's had
• 49:29
  Speaker 4: a baby, who's dead? Come on, and and that always
• 49:35
  Speaker 4: comes with a cool picture of everybody in a in
• 49:38
  Speaker 4: a matching outfit.
• 49:40
  Speaker 3: In a Jean's jacket, Maria, wrong, curse and for basically
• 49:48
  Speaker 3: what you're just telling me. I love reading these things. Yeah,
• 49:51
  Speaker 3: I feel like they've fallen out of fashion. I feel
• 49:53
  Speaker 3: like people don't do them anymore. I never get I
• 49:55
  Speaker 3: would love getting these things. I mean, for such a
• 49:57
  Speaker 3: variety of reasons.
• 49:58
  Speaker 4: Send you one, Scott. Yeah, we and we send out
• 50:03
  Speaker 4: the real info. We're not we're not sugarcoading.
• 50:06
  Speaker 3: But you're writing a letter and sending it out.
• 50:08
  Speaker 4: Yes, Oh no, no, no, no, uh, printed on those cards.
• 50:12
  Speaker 4: You get it through the internet. We would put it on. Yeah,
• 50:15
  Speaker 4: they send to the card, he print, It's all printed
• 50:17
  Speaker 4: on the card.
• 50:18
  Speaker 3: Yeah. We I mean I remember as a kid, my family,
• 50:21
  Speaker 3: like people all over the neighborhood were sending us these
• 50:23
  Speaker 3: things just you know, essentially to brag about what their
• 50:26
  Speaker 3: children were doing. What have you delightful to read? I mean,
• 50:30
  Speaker 3: for so many reasons.
• 50:31
  Speaker 4: So fun because you know what the real real shit is.
• 50:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you know exactly what's going on.
• 50:35
  Speaker 4: So trying to commit suicide, but they're not gonna mention it.
• 50:40
  Speaker 3: I want to see that in a Christmas update.
• 50:42
  Speaker 4: And I say that having tried to commit suicide. So
• 50:46
  Speaker 4: just so you know, if you need help out text
• 50:48
  Speaker 4: nine to eight eight. But also know that sometimes there's
• 50:51
  Speaker 4: a wait time of forty five to sixty minutes. So
• 50:53
  Speaker 4: call fucking anybody. I called Hurts run a car South Pasadena.
• 50:57
  Speaker 4: They picked up on the first ring.
• 50:59
  Speaker 3: All right, it's important to reach out to. It's just
• 51:01
  Speaker 3: literally anyone in that moment.
• 51:03
  Speaker 4: Anyone.
• 51:05
  Speaker 3: Okay, so zero so far, no points. Number two. This
• 51:10
  Speaker 3: is from a listener named Sarah Gift to a curse
• 51:12
  Speaker 3: backing into a parking spot.
• 51:14
  Speaker 4: I'm interested. I mean, is there there's that reason that
• 51:19
  Speaker 4: the reason you're doing it is to feel like you're
• 51:22
  Speaker 4: ahead of the game at the end of the night,
• 51:25
  Speaker 4: like you don't have to back out, you just go
• 51:28
  Speaker 4: jam on in. That's what I'm thinking, Or a sense
• 51:32
  Speaker 4: of accomplishment, like I did something kind of neat because
• 51:37
  Speaker 4: it is it isn't your regular parking job. Can I
• 51:43
  Speaker 4: can I rest without voting?
• 51:46
  Speaker 3: No? Absolutely not.
• 51:49
  Speaker 5: Hm.
• 51:50
  Speaker 4: I think it's good.
• 51:52
  Speaker 3: You're right, You're correct. I think that they I think
• 51:55
  Speaker 3: backing into a parking spot has kind of gotten a
• 51:57
  Speaker 3: bad name.
• 51:58
  Speaker 4: Is this arbitrary? Where?
• 52:02
  Speaker 3: Absolutely not. It's objective universal truths that some of them
• 52:07
  Speaker 3: you're just not familiar with. And that's fine, you're growing.
• 52:10
  Speaker 3: Oh god, you just you just got.
• 52:12
  Speaker 4: One correct, Okay, thank you, thank you very much.
• 52:15
  Speaker 3: I mean I don't I've probably backed into a couple
• 52:17
  Speaker 3: of parking spots just because I had no choice at
• 52:19
  Speaker 3: some point. And you know, I'm not good at backing
• 52:21
  Speaker 3: up the car. Okay, it makes me nervous. But once
• 52:23
  Speaker 3: you've done it, the sense of accomplishment is unbelievable. Yeah,
• 52:26
  Speaker 3: and then when you come out, you get to just
• 52:28
  Speaker 3: pull away and there's no I mean, I guess there
• 52:31
  Speaker 3: at some point you're going to be backing the car up.
• 52:33
  Speaker 4: I've seen that it seems to think men do more
• 52:35
  Speaker 4: than women.
• 52:36
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 52:36
  Speaker 3: Sometimes I feel like it's like a show off move
• 52:38
  Speaker 3: or it feels like you're kind of flash but to
• 52:42
  Speaker 3: do something super cool. But ultimately it's very convenient. And uh,
• 52:50
  Speaker 3: I mean, I guess it's not.
• 52:52
  Speaker 4: What I hang my hat on.
• 52:54
  Speaker 6: I don't.
• 52:54
  Speaker 4: I don't go back through my day and go.
• 52:57
  Speaker 8: Remember that, Wow, awesome.
• 53:04
  Speaker 3: But okay, you've gotten one out of two so far decent.
• 53:11
  Speaker 3: This third one is from a listener named Danielle Gift
• 53:13
  Speaker 3: or a Curse group text discussion of what to bring
• 53:17
  Speaker 3: to the parties.
• 53:18
  Speaker 4: Yes, yes, yes, yes, I want to know what everybody brings.
• 53:23
  Speaker 4: I also want to know about the hurt feelings because
• 53:26
  Speaker 4: there are some real I have dear friends who have
• 53:30
  Speaker 4: such high standards for food are real bitches. I'm seeing men, women,
• 53:35
  Speaker 4: and gender nonspecific about food where they say I had
• 53:42
  Speaker 4: a friend who I love dearly, and I'm going to
• 53:45
  Speaker 4: say her name, Jackie Kashin Well, I would have pizza parties,
• 53:49
  Speaker 4: still do all the time. She came to my pizza
• 53:52
  Speaker 4: party one of money I'd had and said you need
• 53:55
  Speaker 4: it or order better pizza.
• 53:57
  Speaker 3: Pizza sucks. Fruit. Where were you ordering from?
• 54:02
  Speaker 4: Pizza man in ego rock Pizza Man? No, very inexpensive
• 54:08
  Speaker 4: pizza is not why people were coming to the party.
• 54:12
  Speaker 4: If you want to make pizza good, dip it in
• 54:15
  Speaker 4: an olive oil, grab the cheese from one slice, put
• 54:19
  Speaker 4: double it up on the second slice, slam that in
• 54:22
  Speaker 4: the microwave. Meat kitchen is your kitchen.
• 54:25
  Speaker 3: Oh so you're suggesting they do this during the party.
• 54:27
  Speaker 4: Oh yeah, you can do whatever you want, but that
• 54:31
  Speaker 4: people are gathering together. And if you have an opinion
• 54:36
  Speaker 4: about what you have to eat, the quality of food,
• 54:38
  Speaker 4: b yo, f bring your own food.
• 54:43
  Speaker 3: How did you respond to this? Did you start getting
• 54:46
  Speaker 3: better pizza?
• 54:47
  Speaker 4: I did, But now I've gone back to I've gone
• 54:50
  Speaker 4: back to potlucks and cheap. I just dell Taco like,
• 54:56
  Speaker 4: Oh no, taco sucks.
• 54:58
  Speaker 3: They have a great crunchy top.
• 55:00
  Speaker 4: Don't you bring some mouse? Also, yeah, a lot of
• 55:03
  Speaker 4: people love Del Taco. McDonald's french fries keep heating. As
• 55:08
  Speaker 4: long as you keep those heated.
• 55:09
  Speaker 3: Up, that's a risky thing for a party.
• 55:11
  Speaker 4: A little risky, but also it's a fun things. It's
• 55:15
  Speaker 4: unlikely and people go.
• 55:21
  Speaker 3: It brings a child.
• 55:27
  Speaker 4: Anyways, that kind of thing where there's some sort of bullshit.
• 55:32
  Speaker 4: A friend she went to Eastern She sent me a
• 55:34
  Speaker 4: video saying kind of making fun of the Easter food
• 55:38
  Speaker 4: that was there. And I did not comment on the
• 55:41
  Speaker 4: I know she wanted me to comment on the thing, saying.
• 55:44
  Speaker 5: Haha, they shouldn't have had stewed tomatoes with a bunch
• 55:48
  Speaker 5: of assholes.
• 55:51
  Speaker 4: I don't know. I'll eat anything. I eat truckstop food.
• 55:54
  Speaker 4: I'm a real fan of Have you ever had a
• 55:57
  Speaker 4: gas station tuna fish sandwich? I'm like a flying jazz
• 56:00
  Speaker 4: Oh tuna nougat. It's not it's not aven tuna. It's
• 56:06
  Speaker 4: an amalgamated resource. It's created for the masses that last
• 56:13
  Speaker 4: years at a refrigerator. But yeah, I just I think
• 56:17
  Speaker 4: if you're invited somewhere, keep your mouth shut, or bring
• 56:22
  Speaker 4: a snack. I've been to a vegan wedding, bring a sandwich,
• 56:27
  Speaker 4: because it's gonna be a it's gonna be a long wait.
• 56:30
  Speaker 4: If they're vegan, they're probably sober. There's not gonna be
• 56:33
  Speaker 4: an open bar. Take care of yourself. Stuff a donut,
• 56:37
  Speaker 4: in your purse.
• 56:38
  Speaker 3: But I feel like at a vegan wedding, you're probably
• 56:40
  Speaker 3: getting decent vegan food because they're.
• 56:42
  Speaker 4: No vegans also usually healthy, so they can be slightly
• 56:50
  Speaker 4: eating disordered. So the caterer will be like.
• 56:53
  Speaker 6: Let's start it off with a piece of salary out
• 56:56
  Speaker 6: of San Marino, California and a light glaze of special
• 57:02
  Speaker 6: olive oils made from the Motherland.
• 57:05
  Speaker 4: Like it's people who are they're living on not much
• 57:10
  Speaker 4: food all the time, so they don't think about how
• 57:15
  Speaker 4: hunger affects most.
• 57:16
  Speaker 3: People blood sugar levels.
• 57:17
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 57:18
  Speaker 4: Anyways, that's my experience with vegans is they can play
• 57:22
  Speaker 4: the long game during.
• 57:23
  Speaker 3: Meals, okay, but ultimately you're saying gift for this group
• 57:29
  Speaker 3: discussion of what to bring to the party.
• 57:31
  Speaker 4: Oh I love it.
• 57:32
  Speaker 3: Yes, correct. I'm not a big group text person, but
• 57:37
  Speaker 3: this is one of the times when everyone needs to
• 57:39
  Speaker 3: be on the same page. It's a valuable use of
• 57:42
  Speaker 3: the group text as long as people don't start getting
• 57:45
  Speaker 3: off on tangents.
• 57:46
  Speaker 4: I love it, and I love looking forward to what
• 57:48
  Speaker 4: people are going to bring. I'd like to know, yes,
• 57:51
  Speaker 4: Caesar salad. Oh my god, this one guy always brings.
• 57:55
  Speaker 4: He's from the dog park. We have a dog park
• 57:57
  Speaker 4: pot Lock sometimes and he always brings like a mac
• 58:01
  Speaker 4: and cheese, Oh delicious, one vegetarian, one.
• 58:04
  Speaker 3: With meat, what kind of meat, bacon?
• 58:06
  Speaker 4: Bacon?
• 58:07
  Speaker 3: Yes, that's a good mac and cheese. Adding, I feel
• 58:10
  Speaker 3: like I'm winning.
• 58:11
  Speaker 4: I'm above the points now and now I'm doing well.
• 58:13
  Speaker 3: Right, You've got two out of three? Okay, great, we
• 58:15
  Speaker 3: can do another if you'd like. No, I don't want,
• 58:19
  Speaker 3: don't press threw it up, don't press your lick.
• 58:22
  Speaker 6: No.
• 58:22
  Speaker 3: I do love the group text. I love to plant
• 58:24
  Speaker 3: my flag. There's one thing I can make. This is
• 58:26
  Speaker 3: what I'm bringing. Don't ask for anything else. And then
• 58:29
  Speaker 3: I get to move on with my day knowing that
• 58:31
  Speaker 3: no one's gonna cop or end up with the same
• 58:33
  Speaker 3: thing at the well.
• 58:35
  Speaker 4: And if they do, it's a showdown.
• 58:37
  Speaker 3: It's an absolute showdown, and I'm going to win or
• 58:40
  Speaker 3: I'm going to do. What do you like to start
• 58:41
  Speaker 3: a fight? Cookies? I like to make it.
• 58:44
  Speaker 4: What kind of cookie?
• 58:45
  Speaker 3: Generally a chocolate chip? I make it. I mean, I'm
• 58:48
  Speaker 3: telling you the frozen I have some frozen dough in
• 58:50
  Speaker 3: my freezer that I made recently, maybe the best I've
• 58:53
  Speaker 3: ever made. I go crazy every time I eat one.
• 58:55
  Speaker 4: What are the special ingredients.
• 58:57
  Speaker 3: They have a little bit. This is a new thing.
• 58:59
  Speaker 3: I think that a lot of bakers are adding to
• 59:01
  Speaker 3: chocolate chip cookies dehydrated milk. There's just a tiny bit
• 59:06
  Speaker 3: of it, like milk powder, and it caramelizes in the
• 59:08
  Speaker 3: cookie and gives it like this multi caramel flavor, just
• 59:13
  Speaker 3: a little.
• 59:13
  Speaker 4: Not to overwhel no, no, yeah.
• 59:15
  Speaker 3: They have walnuts. Can you eat a walnut?
• 59:17
  Speaker 4: Oh god, I can eat anything.
• 59:19
  Speaker 3: I love a walnut and a cookie. And then I
• 59:21
  Speaker 3: used bread flour and cake flour, a little more brown
• 59:25
  Speaker 3: sugar than usual. They're just I mean, I can't tell
• 59:29
  Speaker 3: you how good they are. Okay, so I'm getting better.
• 59:33
  Speaker 3: Oh my god, I think I need to get better
• 59:35
  Speaker 3: because I'm gonna have to find another career path, probably
• 59:37
  Speaker 3: in the next ten years.
• 59:39
  Speaker 4: Well, and this isn't all there is. I've been a secretary,
• 59:43
  Speaker 4: I've cleaned houses. I've been a what else, a waitress?
• 59:47
  Speaker 4: Have been Those were good jobs too.
• 59:49
  Speaker 3: Every job, well not every job, but a lot of
• 59:51
  Speaker 3: jobs have pause. I loved working as a waiter in
• 59:54
  Speaker 3: food where like you knew what the result was always
• 59:57
  Speaker 3: going to be.
• 59:58
  Speaker 4: In the emotional te of a hungry table. Oh, of course,
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 4: especially I mean La. I stopped wagish thing when I
• 1:00:06
  Speaker 4: came to La because it gets so intense, Like.
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 5: I need a side of that, and I need a
• 1:00:12
  Speaker 5: I need a cup of coffee, but I don't want
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 5: the ice to get all tiny, but I want ice
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 5: in a hot cup of coffee.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 4: And then I need I.
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 5: Need a ramikin of fresh raspberries, and I need another
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 5: kind of food from a restaurant far away.
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 6: Thank you, Thank you so much.
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 4: I really appreciate what you do.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 3: I do think there's kind of a theater among some
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 3: people of how nice they can be to servers. And
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 3: I think you should be respectful and kind, but some people,
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 3: I think go too far where you're like you're making
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 3: up for something. Leave malone right, yeah, tip, yes, just
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 3: pay them at the end of the meal and be
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 3: a decent person. Yep of Okay, well two out of three.
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 3: Incredible job, Mary, Thank you so much.
• 1:01:02
  Speaker 4: This has been so fun.
• 1:01:04
  Speaker 3: We'll have to answer answer a listener question.
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 4: Oh, I thought we did.
• 1:01:08
  Speaker 3: Absolutely not.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 4: It's been a while, it's been an hour. I'm an introvert.
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 3: We have to answer a listener question. People are writing
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 3: into I said no gifts at gmail dot com. Desperate
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 3: for Answersbury, I'm sorry, this will be an easy, easy thing.
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 3: Can you help me answer one question? Okay, this is
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 3: dear bridger and distinguished guest. Oh, based on your reputation
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 3: for giving incredible career advice, I've come seeking answers. My
• 1:01:39
  Speaker 3: boss will soon be hiring to fill a role that
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 3: I work closely with. There's an internal candidate that I
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 3: slightly know, and I believe my boss favors this person. However,
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 3: I find this candidate incredibly annoying. How do I handle
• 1:01:53
  Speaker 3: this professionally but still ensure I don't have to work
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 3: with someone who drives me nuts. I have no poker faces,
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 3: so if I dislike some one, then the whole world
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 3: knows that. Please help. Easily irritated in Colorado, I feel
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 3: like this is a tricky thing.
• 1:02:08
  Speaker 4: Well, do you expect life to always be comfortable? I
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 4: think that's where we're starting at a loss. Life is suffering. Okay,
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 4: can we start there?
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 3: I think that's a place to start.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 4: So any like flights of fancy into the spirit world
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 4: where you feel a sense of joy, that's a bonus. Okay,
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 4: So this person also, I want to say. Often people
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 4: that really irritate me, I am exactly like them. Just
• 1:02:46
  Speaker 4: start noticing what traits you have in common. Also notice
• 1:02:53
  Speaker 4: these traits and what makes them kind of miraculous. We
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 4: have this neighbor who she would come over all the time,
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 4: even though I asked her not to, without warning and
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 4: say hi, and she would often bring just any rando.
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 5: And say I wanted to introduce you to a good
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 5: friend of mine. Oh no, And I'm like, hey, girl, hey,
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 5: I did not say that, because that's appropriation. I said, yeah,
• 1:03:24
  Speaker 5: please don't. But then what we learned about our neighbor
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 5: is that she works legally with people who are from
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 5: war torn countries to get refuge in the US. And
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 5: that kind of detachment, well, it's a bit of an
• 1:03:42
  Speaker 5: autistic experience where she doesn't read people's emotions. Makes it
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 5: sure she's she just doesn't read.
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 4: It's just like, yeah, I'm just gonna get people in.
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 5: No, I'm just gonna I'm gonna keep talking to you,
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 5: and then that person is gonna get out of Syria
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 5: and get to a safe place of refuge.
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 3: For that job.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 4: It's a miracle. So just think of the miraculous traits
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 4: of this person. Also wonder if you might have those
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 4: traits yourself.
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 3: Just try to bridge the gap. I think that that's
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 3: excellent advice.
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 9: Yeah.
• 1:04:19
  Speaker 4: Also, what are you doing looking over there? Keep your
• 1:04:23
  Speaker 4: eyes on your own paper.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 3: Do some work on yourself. He's easily irritated in Colorado probable.
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 4: Meditate in through the nose, out through the mouth. Right,
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 4: it's do you know that when you breathe in through
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 4: your nose it's cool, and then when the air comes
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 4: out through your mouth it's warm. Bet you didn't know
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 4: that because you're being such a bitch.
• 1:04:48
  Speaker 3: There's your answer, the perfect solution to the problem. Don't
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 3: write back in Maria, God bless thank you.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 4: I love you so much.
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 3: Thank you so much for having me. I'm so wonderful.
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 4: Grab a plant and a good shabos.
• 1:05:06
  Speaker 3: Listener, The podcast is over. We've made it through two hundred.
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 3: Let's try to make it through at least five more.
• 1:05:12
  Speaker 3: We'll see what happens. I love you, goodbye, I said
• 1:05:21
  Speaker 3: no Gifts is an exactly right production. It's produced by
• 1:05:24
  Speaker 3: our dear friend Analise Nelson, and it's beautifully mixed by
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 3: Ben Holliday. And we couldn't do it without our guest
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 3: booker Patrick Kottner. The theme song, of course, could only
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 3: come from miracle worker Amy Mann. You must follow the
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 3: show on Instagram. At I said, no gifts. I don't
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 3: want to hear any excuses. That's where you get to
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 3: see pictures of all these gorgeous gifts I'm getting. And
• 1:05:46
  Speaker 3: don't you want to see pictures of the gifts?
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 4: Invit?
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 3: Did you hear?
• 1:05:54
  Speaker 1: Funamin myself perfectly clear? When you're I guess you gotta
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 1: come to me empty? And I said, no, guest, your
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 1: own presences presents enough.
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 2: I already had too much stuff, So how do you
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 2: dare to surbey me