Latest / The Daily Writer / Re-Programming Your Mindset (with Valerie Pugsley)
Transcript
- 0:01SPEAKER_00: Did you know you have a serious problem?
- 0:05SPEAKER_00: Every day your mind is being programmed by the people you talk to, the news you watch, the books you read, and everything else you consume.
- 0:12SPEAKER_00: It's all giving your mind a blueprint for what and how to think.
- 0:17SPEAKER_00: But I have some great news.
- 0:18SPEAKER_00: You can change the programming so you can think more clearly and have more success in your life and business.
- 0:25SPEAKER_00: Well, hello my friend.
- 0:26SPEAKER_00: This is Kent Sanders from Inkwell Ghostwriting.
- 0:29SPEAKER_00: Welcome to this episode of the Smart Business Writing Podcast.
- 0:32SPEAKER_00: This is the show that helps you grow your business, amplify your authority, and increase your impact through the power of writing.
- 0:39SPEAKER_00: As always, I appreciate you joining me for this episode.
- 0:43SPEAKER_00: Well, today's conversation is a really fun interview with my new friend Valerie Pugsley.
- 0:48SPEAKER_00: I have to give a shout-out to my friend Michael Dane, who was on the show a few episodes back.
- 0:54SPEAKER_00: I have to give him a shout-out for introducing me to Valerie, who is a possibility mindset coach.
- 0:59SPEAKER_00: And man, is that a valuable niche.
- 1:01SPEAKER_00: We all need to be constantly working on our mindset and our thinking.
- 1:06SPEAKER_00: Valerie is here to help us to reprogram and improve our mindset by getting a proper perspective on failure, comparison, and so much more.
- 1:14SPEAKER_00: She also has some great insights about how we use our words as writers.
- 1:19SPEAKER_00: You know, words are very powerful, and it's critical that we use them in the correct way.
- 1:24SPEAKER_00: Well, this conversation was a blast, and I hope it impacts you as much as it did me.
- 1:28SPEAKER_00: So let's get right to the conversation with Valerie Pugsley.
- 1:32SPEAKER_00: Valerie, thank you so much for making time to do the show today.
- 1:34SPEAKER_00: I've been excited about this because I know you have uh lots to offer our listeners, no pressure, by the way.
- 1:42SPEAKER_00: But I know you bring a unique perspective to these issues of writing and the creative life and so forth.
- 1:47SPEAKER_00: So thanks again.
- 1:48SPEAKER_00: I really appreciate it.
- 1:50SPEAKER_01: Well, thank you for having me.
- 1:51SPEAKER_01: I'm thrilled to be here.
- 1:53SPEAKER_00: So before we dive into a couple of specific things, can you first talk just about what it is that you do overall and how you help people and the perspective that you're coming from as we enter into this conversation?
- 2:07SPEAKER_01: Okay, sure.
- 2:08SPEAKER_01: So um back in, I think it was about, well, back in the day, we'll forget dates.
- 2:15SPEAKER_01: I got involved with internet marketing and learning marketing on the internet and wanting to do some consulting, which I did.
- 2:23SPEAKER_01: But as I was working on my own journey, I was learning and getting in coaching or getting coached by coaches, realizing that I had a lot of problems with my mindset.
- 2:35SPEAKER_01: I shouldn't say problems, there were just some things with my mindset that I needed to deal with.
- 2:41SPEAKER_01: And the more and more that I dealt with that, and the more that I learned about the brain and how it works, and our mind and how it works, um, that became I became much more passionate about that than the marketing, although I still love marketing.
- 2:56SPEAKER_01: Um, and I just feel like this is the thing, this kind of like that foundational piece that keeps holding people back.
- 3:04SPEAKER_01: And when you listen to a lot of experts, they'll say, Oh, well, when I've shifted my mindset or my mindset, my mindset, but no one was teaching how helping with the mindset.
- 3:13SPEAKER_01: And yet that was like that that crux piece that was crucial to them really moving forward with their success.
- 3:22SPEAKER_00: So let's define our terms a little bit first.
- 3:24SPEAKER_00: When you talk about mindset, and I think everybody realizes what a mindset is, but but can you dive into that a little bit?
- 3:30SPEAKER_00: Help us understand what is a mindset and how do we know what kind of a mindset that we have.
- 3:37SPEAKER_01: That is a good point.
- 3:38SPEAKER_01: And I should have looked up the definition because I actually recently looked it up.
- 3:42SPEAKER_01: I'm going, what is that anyway, right?
- 3:44SPEAKER_01: Because I was thinking the same thing.
- 3:45SPEAKER_01: What I mean, what is it anyway?
- 3:47SPEAKER_01: And really, it's just your beliefs.
- 3:49SPEAKER_01: What it, you know, what is your belief system?
- 3:51SPEAKER_01: What are you believing?
- 3:52SPEAKER_01: That's like what your mind is set on.
- 3:55SPEAKER_01: Um there's some different mindsets, people will label it different ways.
- 4:01SPEAKER_01: Um, some will say they have a victim mindset or a fixed mindset versus a growth mindset.
- 4:09SPEAKER_01: Um, probably the best way to describe that is if you have the victim or the fixed mindset, you look at things as happening to you.
- 4:20SPEAKER_01: Whereas if you have more of a growth mindset, you look at things happening for you.
- 4:25SPEAKER_01: I tend to be on the growth side, although uh we share a similar faith.
- 4:32SPEAKER_01: And I got amusing, and I will say, based on my understanding of the spiritual realm, uh, God gave me the idea of that I'm a possibility mindset coach.
- 4:43SPEAKER_01: So uh there's the verse that talks about how all things are possible through Christ who strengthens us, and yet most of us, believers, not believers, whatever, we don't listen live in the possibility.
- 4:55SPEAKER_01: We live in what we can't do or in the excuse or or the challenges, and we let those things dictate what we do, as opposed to looking at, well, what's possible?
- 5:06SPEAKER_01: Well, how can I?
- 5:08SPEAKER_01: And going getting through it to the other side.
- 5:11SPEAKER_00: Okay, that's great.
- 5:12SPEAKER_00: And and we're living in a time that is a perfect example.
- 5:15SPEAKER_00: So give us an example or two, if you can.
- 5:19SPEAKER_00: Most of us are stuck at home right now.
- 5:21SPEAKER_00: People are dealing with financial loss, you know, there's a worldwide pandemic.
- 5:26SPEAKER_00: Arguably it's a negative situation.
- 5:28SPEAKER_00: I think it's you know, most people would frame it that way.
- 5:31SPEAKER_00: But how could we look at this current virus pandemic situation as something that is happening for us, something that we can build on to grow and to to be better, or to offer more value to people?
- 5:43SPEAKER_00: How can we look at that in a way that's positive rather than all the negative ways that everyone around us is talking about and that the media frames it as?
- 5:52SPEAKER_01: Oh boy, you're gonna put me on a soapbox now.
- 5:56SPEAKER_00: That's that's all right.
- 5:57SPEAKER_00: That's why I have podcast guests.
- 5:58SPEAKER_00: I love soapboxes.
- 6:00SPEAKER_01: Okay.
- 6:01SPEAKER_01: So the first thing is, you know what, let's start with language with us, because this is this is one of my pet peeves right now.
- 6:09SPEAKER_01: Um you mentioned media, mainstream media.
- 6:12SPEAKER_01: I I okay, I'm not gonna use the four-letter word that I don't like to use that starts with H A, just to clarify.
- 6:23SPEAKER_01: It the whenever I hear the term social distancing, it it's like uh nails on a chalkboard now.
- 6:33SPEAKER_01: And so what I would encourage your audience to do is do what I've done and find a different term, and I'm gonna share with you what that what I what I call it, it's physical distancing, right?
- 6:44SPEAKER_01: And that we need to distance each other from each other physically, but we don't have to distance ourselves socially, and like the whole world knows how to use Zoom now, and we can still be social in that way.
- 6:58SPEAKER_01: So we can look at, and another thing is the words that we choose as writers.
- 7:03SPEAKER_01: You guys know how important your words are, right?
- 7:07SPEAKER_01: So you called it a pandemic.
- 7:08SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, there's all those words, and those words are coming up for me.
- 7:12SPEAKER_01: I was going, this is crazy, this is nuts, you know, all of these things.
- 7:15SPEAKER_01: And I'm like, do I want to live crazy?
- 7:17SPEAKER_01: Do I want to live nuts?
- 7:19SPEAKER_01: No, I don't.
- 7:21SPEAKER_01: What well, what is this?
- 7:22SPEAKER_01: What can I call this?
- 7:23SPEAKER_01: And so I came up with a unique season.
- 7:26SPEAKER_01: So it's about reframing the language.
- 7:28SPEAKER_01: You know, look at we get to choose the label, right?
- 7:32SPEAKER_01: We you you you have a multitude of choices of words to describe the feeling that you want in a piece of writing.
- 7:39SPEAKER_01: Well, we can do that with our life too.
- 7:41SPEAKER_01: So we can choose to call this a pandemic, we can choose to call it a crisis, and yes, it's those things, but is that what I want to live in?
- 7:50SPEAKER_01: No, I will live in a unique season.
- 7:52SPEAKER_01: This is a unique season.
- 7:54SPEAKER_01: So are there challenges in a unique season?
- 7:56SPEAKER_01: Yes.
- 7:57SPEAKER_01: Are there opportunities in a unique season?
- 7:59SPEAKER_01: Yes.
- 8:00SPEAKER_01: You know, and we hear a lot of the negative side of things, but there are a lot of businesses that are really prospering right now.
- 8:07SPEAKER_01: You know, lawyers, lawyers are um trying to think.
- 8:11SPEAKER_01: I've run across people who are doing online marketing who already have online businesses, a lot of them are doing very well.
- 8:18SPEAKER_01: So there's a lot of good things happening too, and there's a whole new set of problems that people can provide solutions for.
- 8:26SPEAKER_01: So you have businesses pivoting.
- 8:29SPEAKER_01: What was I saw?
- 8:30SPEAKER_01: Carmaker is now making the respirators.
- 8:33SPEAKER_01: You know, so are you what are you gonna do?
- 8:35SPEAKER_01: Are you gonna look at the negative side of things and what's going on, or what are the opportunities?
- 8:41SPEAKER_01: What's the positive, and how can you add value to the world?
- 8:44SPEAKER_01: If you have that positive attitude, you can be.
- 8:48SPEAKER_01: I know you had uh uh Jodi Mayberry, who I've also met before, talking about podcasts.
- 8:53SPEAKER_01: Well, you don't have to have a podcast, but you could go do a Facebook Live on your personal profile and tell people, you know, some tips that you've done, a recipe that you found, how you're dealing with your kids, you know, add value into the world.
- 9:06SPEAKER_01: How can you add value?
- 9:08SPEAKER_01: So, you know, that I don't know, I I don't remember the first part of your question, but I hope I answered it with that.
- 9:15SPEAKER_00: Oh, yeah.
- 9:15SPEAKER_00: See, and then that's exactly you're representing exactly the way that I think about the world as well.
- 9:21SPEAKER_00: Words are emotional, and it's kind of funny because I use the word pandemic, not even thinking about it, but you're so right that that even that word alone, pandemic, it makes us it's an emotional word that makes us feel like the whole world's on fire, we're all being destroyed, everything's gonna go up in flames.
- 9:39SPEAKER_00: And it's it's something that we don't even think about.
- 9:42SPEAKER_00: We just use the words that the media throws out there with without even realizing the emotional connotations of that language.
- 9:49SPEAKER_00: As a writer, I should know better, but I guess we all are prone to do that.
- 9:53SPEAKER_00: We just use these words and don't even think about how they might trigger people emotionally or what they're actually communicating.
- 10:01SPEAKER_01: Right, and how they trigger us.
- 10:03SPEAKER_01: Um, an example not related to the current situation, I'll use I a while back.
- 10:08SPEAKER_01: I had a close family member in a hospital, and the word that kept coming to mind, so that my automatic programming that came to mind was that I was in a crisis.
- 10:20SPEAKER_01: And I started thinking, you know, do I really want this to be a crisis?
- 10:24SPEAKER_01: No.
- 10:24SPEAKER_01: And I started praying, well, how can I reframe this?
- 10:27SPEAKER_01: You know, what else can, you know, what other label can I give this?
- 10:31SPEAKER_01: And I came up with unplanned schedule changes, which that's another term that worked for today, too, right?
- 10:37SPEAKER_01: We've all had some unplanned schedule changes as a result of this.
- 10:41SPEAKER_01: But which found which sounds better, which feels better, how does it make you feel?
- 10:45SPEAKER_01: What you know, in the listener, um, you know, what how do just what does it make you feel light?
- 10:51SPEAKER_01: Does it make you feel heavy?
- 10:52SPEAKER_01: Is it gonna burden you or is it gonna help move you forward?
- 10:56SPEAKER_00: So Man, though those are such great questions, and it's just a great reminder that we can choose our response.
- 11:03SPEAKER_00: You can choose whether to be in crisis or you can choose whether to be in opportunity mode.
- 11:09SPEAKER_00: And you know, it it's like the the facts of the facts that exists and events that exist are really at their at their base level, they're there's they're neither negative nor positive, they're just things that are.
- 11:21SPEAKER_00: They're things that exist, and you can choose the way that you see them, whether as negative or positive.
- 11:27SPEAKER_00: I know to some people that seems like a very weird way of thinking, but that's that's how I really think of it.
- 11:33SPEAKER_01: Well, and and and there's truth to that, and then here's here's the uh the other thing that's also true about that.
- 11:44SPEAKER_01: We can choose it, but we have to be very intentional because so getting more into um maybe not so much mindset, but how your mind works, is that it takes a lot of energy for our brain to run our body to make everything function.
- 12:03SPEAKER_01: And so it automates as much as it can.
- 12:06SPEAKER_01: So you guys are you're into writing stories.
- 12:10SPEAKER_01: Well, we've been writing, whether we write them out in in the way you teach people to write them out or not, we're all writing stories, and they've been being written since we were little kids.
- 12:20SPEAKER_01: And we wrote stories about the circumstances that were around us and what they what it all meant, right?
- 12:25SPEAKER_01: We gave it all labels.
- 12:27SPEAKER_01: And if those stories and situations, if we kept repeating those, then our brain said, Oh, I need to automate this.
- 12:37SPEAKER_01: So it automates it.
- 12:39SPEAKER_01: So just like you were saying earlier, the word pandemic just came up because you hadn't really been thinking about the importance of the language that you're using in your day-to-day.
- 12:49SPEAKER_01: You think about the importance of it in your writing, but you haven't been as intentional about it in your day-to-day.
- 12:55SPEAKER_01: I have been because that's the mindset work, you know, that I that I have done.
- 12:59SPEAKER_01: So, so while we do have a choice of how to respond, in some ways, yes, and in some ways no, because we have this autopilot stories, these autopilot patterns that are running 80, well, it varies.
- 13:15SPEAKER_01: I've heard statistics anywhere between 75 to 90 percent of the things that we say and do in a given day are autopilot based on things from the past.
- 13:27SPEAKER_01: So, in order to change that and have that freedom to be able to make a choice and to choose how we're gonna respond, we have to put some work and some intention into changing that story, changing those stories that are on autopilot.
- 13:42SPEAKER_00: So, let me go with this thread a little bit.
- 13:44SPEAKER_00: How do we go about repro reprogramming that?
- 13:47SPEAKER_00: Because you're so correct.
- 13:48SPEAKER_00: Like right now, I'm recording on a MacBook Pro.
- 13:52SPEAKER_00: You know, a Mac is going to respond a certain way when you have certain inputs based on its programming and the way it's designed.
- 13:58SPEAKER_00: My son loves PCs, uh, he's building one very soon and he's learning about all that stuff.
- 14:04SPEAKER_00: You know, a PC is going to respond a little differently because it's programmed a little differently.
- 14:09SPEAKER_00: iOS is gonna respond differently than Android and so forth.
- 14:12SPEAKER_00: How can we begin to reprogram our minds and our thinking in a way that's more positive?
- 14:17SPEAKER_00: Where do we even start?
- 14:19SPEAKER_00: Because we we live within our own minds, so how can we begin to look at it more objectively and reprogram it?
- 14:26SPEAKER_01: Um oh, there's so many places I could go with this.
- 14:31SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I know that's a very that's a that's a huge complicated question.
- 14:34SPEAKER_01: I really you know let's go with it.
- 14:38SPEAKER_01: Um we you we had talked earlier about some of the things that your readers say, so let's approach it from that perspective, and then that will help me stay a little bit focused because I could go everywhere with it.
- 14:49SPEAKER_01: Um this will put some hands and feet on it.
- 14:52SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 14:53SPEAKER_01: So one of the things that you were said that um some of the people that are are listening to you that they're afraid that their their writing is not going to be good enough, and in fact, that they may even already have some things written, but they haven't they haven't published it yet, or you know, they're just staying in that research mode.
- 15:13SPEAKER_01: So that good enough, right?
- 15:15SPEAKER_01: Well, first of all, let's just look at that.
- 15:18SPEAKER_01: What's the definition of good enough and who decides?
- 15:23SPEAKER_01: So when they're saying good enough, they're probably basing it on something, somebody else's story that was told to them as a kid, or they're basing it on past experience.
- 15:38SPEAKER_01: So the question that I would have them ask themselves if that's one of their stories, if that's one of the things that they're afraid to move forward because they're not going to be good enough, is to look back and say, where when else have I not felt good enough?
- 15:54SPEAKER_01: Or another question they could ask themselves is when was the first time I didn't feel like I was good enough?
- 16:02SPEAKER_01: And so leaning into that phrase good enough and trying to you know go back a little bit in the history, and this isn't about you know deep therapy or anything, it's about first recognizing when did that happen?
- 16:16SPEAKER_01: Then once you once we know where that came from, now we can take that situation and we can look at it in our present self where we're at now and say, well, what's really true about that situation?
- 16:30SPEAKER_01: Or what was really true about those people involved.
- 16:34SPEAKER_01: And what is true now?
- 16:36SPEAKER_01: Have there been times where I have been good enough?
- 16:39SPEAKER_01: What things have I done that aren't good enough?
- 16:42SPEAKER_01: And so it's first, it's first, it's like pulling weeds, right?
- 16:47SPEAKER_01: If anybody's a gardener and you pull a weed, you gotta you gotta get that weed out first and examine it so that we can get rid of it.
- 16:55SPEAKER_01: Then you can rewrite that story.
- 16:58SPEAKER_01: One of the other ways is um hearing our self-talk.
- 17:02SPEAKER_01: We we were kind of just talking about this a minute ago at the beginning.
- 17:06SPEAKER_01: You know, the word pandemic came up for you.
- 17:08SPEAKER_01: When you start catching some of those things that you say that aren't are just that self-talk or those automatic responses, and go, whoa, wait a minute, is this really what I want?
- 17:20SPEAKER_01: Then that's a place where you can start addressing it with intention and start turning it around and reprogramming it.
- 17:29SPEAKER_01: So um, another uh verse that comes to mind for me is there's one that says, catch every thought captive.
- 17:35SPEAKER_00: That's good.
- 17:36SPEAKER_01: And so that's kind of the essence of it is that we have to start catching those thoughts captive and examine them, examine them from a place of non-judgment, right?
- 17:48SPEAKER_01: Like you were saying, we're earlier, we we look at what is, and it's really what is is if you lay give it just a real fact-based label, then you get to decide what other things you want to call it or label it.
- 18:03SPEAKER_01: But it it starts with catching the thoughts captive and and being and being curious and seeing where did it come from and what what really is true, what could I turn this into?
- 18:19SPEAKER_00: Boy, there's a lot of power to that.
- 18:21SPEAKER_00: We could we could take hours and unpack all that, particularly because a lot of people listening are creative by nature, they're art artists, they're writers.
- 18:32SPEAKER_00: Uh, even though this is the smart business writing podcast, you know, writing is still a creative act by nature.
- 18:38SPEAKER_00: And I've even noticed some of these patterns within myself.
- 18:43SPEAKER_00: For example, um, so on this podcast, I sort of frame myself as a guinea pig many times with our podcast guests, uh, and that's kind of fun because I just sort of am doing open heart surgery every episode, and it's fine.
- 18:57SPEAKER_00: It's really I'm fine.
- 18:58SPEAKER_00: I'm just kidding.
- 18:59SPEAKER_00: So one of the things that I have realized in terms of our self-talk, I realized the last few months that for the last two or three years as I have been building up my business, that I have told myself that I'm just not a good business person.
- 19:13SPEAKER_00: I'm more of a creative, I'm more of an artist, I'm not really wired to be a business person.
- 19:18SPEAKER_00: And so therefore I struggle with thinking strategically and coming up with plans and connecting with prospective clients and all those businessy kinds of things that go into a writing business.
- 19:28SPEAKER_00: And it's funny because someone challenged me on that recently and they said, Why are you telling yourself that story?
- 19:32SPEAKER_00: Of course you can do this.
- 19:33SPEAKER_00: Lots of other people have been very successful.
- 19:35SPEAKER_00: There's no reason why you can't do it as well.
- 19:37SPEAKER_00: And it's funny because sometimes it takes someone pointing that out to even realize that we have this negative, destructive self-talk going on.
- 19:45SPEAKER_00: So I'm really glad to hear you point that out because that's a huge insight that I think all of us can take away from this.
- 19:52SPEAKER_01: Right.
- 19:52SPEAKER_01: And that's exactly what you were doing when you were when we when we say I say you, we all do this, right?
- 19:57SPEAKER_01: I mean, crazy, like I said, when this all started to happen, crazy and nuts were the words that came to my mind.
- 20:03SPEAKER_01: And that's and I wait a minute, that's not what I want.
- 20:05SPEAKER_01: But you you also said that what the uh I can't or I'm not, right?
- 20:12SPEAKER_01: When when that's a place to a thing to catch captive, when you say I can't or I'm not, it's like, well, wait a minute, you know.
- 20:19SPEAKER_00: Who said you can't?
- 20:21SPEAKER_01: Right, who said you can't?
- 20:22SPEAKER_01: And you know what that brings me back to one of the other things we talked about that a lot of your right your audience says is fail, right?
- 20:29SPEAKER_01: What what's the story behind fail?
- 20:31SPEAKER_01: So first of all, when you when we start, like you said, you're you're doing things by trial here.
- 20:41SPEAKER_01: This is the beta version, right?
- 20:43SPEAKER_01: Um, you know, when a toddler starts walking, they tip over, but they don't quit.
- 20:48SPEAKER_01: And because they fell over, do we say they failed at walking because they fell down?
- 20:55SPEAKER_01: But we say that to ourselves all the time.
- 20:57SPEAKER_01: So whether that comes from the public school system and getting F's or people in our past as a kids who put us down, family members, neighbors, teachers, whoever, whatever, we have to start rewriting changing that story too.
- 21:15SPEAKER_01: One of the things that I heard recently is, and I like this, is they turned the word FAIL into an acronym of first attempt in learning.
- 21:25SPEAKER_01: And anybody out there who's been successful, they had to do their first one, their first book, their first paragraph, their first whatever.
- 21:34SPEAKER_01: It wasn't, it may not have been good in the beginning.
- 21:36SPEAKER_01: In fact, with writer, with writing, you know it's not good in the beginning, right?
- 21:40SPEAKER_01: That's what's never good.
- 21:42SPEAKER_01: Well, what?
- 21:42SPEAKER_01: How many rough drafts do you do?
- 21:45unknown: Right?
- 21:46SPEAKER_01: So it it why why do we think it has to be and and what is even the definition of success?
- 21:53SPEAKER_01: If you haven't taken the time to define the success, then how do you know if you failed or not?
- 21:58SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 21:58SPEAKER_01: Because you you didn't have Definition for success to begin with.
- 22:03SPEAKER_01: So just taking the next step, right?
- 22:06SPEAKER_01: Focusing on the next step and really watching the words is important.
- 22:13SPEAKER_00: And there's also an element to this where uh you sort of question you have to be a little bit of a um what's the word I'm thinking?
- 22:21SPEAKER_00: I can't think of what the word is off the top of my head, but it's someone who's in who wants to question everything.
- 22:25SPEAKER_00: There there's a word for that kind of a person, but I can't think of what it is.
- 22:28SPEAKER_01: But anyway?
- 22:30SPEAKER_00: What what's that?
- 22:31SPEAKER_01: Inquisitive?
- 22:32SPEAKER_00: Yeah, inquisitive, but it there's almost like um I can't.
- 22:37SPEAKER_00: Well anyway, I can't think of what that person's called.
- 22:39SPEAKER_00: There's there's a word that has kind of a negative connotation where people get annoyed by the person who's always questioning everything.
- 22:45SPEAKER_00: I was kind of that kid in school.
- 22:47SPEAKER_00: You know, all the kids were waiting to get out of class and they would just want to get done early, but here I was always raising my hand, annoying everybody.
- 22:54SPEAKER_00: Because I always had another question.
- 22:56SPEAKER_00: Well, I feel like in some ways we should question what what people we should question the systems that people use to determine what's good and bad art many times.
- 23:06SPEAKER_00: Because I mean, who really determines what's a good movie, what's a bad movie?
- 23:10SPEAKER_00: You know, a lot of people I'm kind of a Star Wars geek.
- 23:13SPEAKER_00: A lot of people loved the the final Star Wars movie, episode nine, a lot of people hated it.
- 23:17SPEAKER_00: Well, who's really to say who's right?
- 23:19SPEAKER_00: So whenever we put our our own stuff out there, who's really to judge whether it's good or bad?
- 23:25SPEAKER_00: I mean there really is no such thing as a definite standard.
- 23:30SPEAKER_00: It's just you know, standards are created by fallible people.
- 23:33SPEAKER_00: So there is an element where I think we have to we have to question that.
- 23:38SPEAKER_00: Whatever that standard is, we have to question that a little bit and just go, well, maybe it's not for you, the stuff that I create, but maybe it is for these other people who who will like it.
- 23:47SPEAKER_01: Yeah, there's that old say saying, right, that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.
- 23:53SPEAKER_00: So Oh, totally, absolutely.
- 23:56SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 23:56SPEAKER_01: So if you as a writer are writing it, and you know, I guess it depends too on what you know the purpose of writing is it's just your heart or your story, if it's um intelligible, right?
- 24:10SPEAKER_01: And there are some people who like it, then it it's fine.
- 24:13SPEAKER_01: And then and then you write another one.
- 24:15SPEAKER_01: Uh now for business writing, depending on what you're kind of writing, for example, copywriting, right?
- 24:21SPEAKER_01: That's another form of writing.
- 24:23SPEAKER_00: Exactly.
- 24:23SPEAKER_01: There would be some definitions there, yes, of what's good and write, because you're writing for a conversion, and so if you're not getting the conversion, then there's something off with the writing.
- 24:34SPEAKER_01: But that just means it's time to go, okay, we just keep refining it, right?
- 24:39SPEAKER_01: I mean, when people are building things, they have to retool things and redesign things.
- 24:43SPEAKER_01: And my husband used to um work um on a C17, and the the they'd get the prints and they'd go to start building it, and it's like, whoa, this doesn't work.
- 24:54SPEAKER_01: There's not enough um space for this screw and the space that was given.
- 24:59SPEAKER_01: So they have to go back to the designer and say, hey, this doesn't work, right?
- 25:03SPEAKER_01: So, I mean, that's just part of the process of of doing it.
- 25:08SPEAKER_01: So yes, there could be a place where there's uh not the success that we desire, but the fact that you got out there and wrote it to begin with, and now you have something you know what doesn't work, kind of like that Thomas Edison thing, right?
- 25:22SPEAKER_01: He just learned 10,000 ways that the light bulb doesn't work.
- 25:24SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
- 25:25SPEAKER_01: So you learned one way that the copy isn't working.
- 25:28SPEAKER_01: So now test and tweak and do the next piece and try again.
- 25:33SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I I think that's very much where the business side of this comes in is if we're writing for ourselves, I I think that's one thing, but if we're writing for someone else and they've hired us to do work, that's a whole different kind of a deal because there is a standard, you know, there is accountability, there are business results that we need to produce for that client for whatever is important to them and they've hired us to do.
- 25:55SPEAKER_00: And I think that that's that is what seems to be difficult for many of us who write is you know, for our own writing, there is this emotional attachment to it, it's self-expression and all those kinds of things.
- 26:08SPEAKER_00: But when it comes to writing for clients or writing for hire, that's a whole different ball of wax that you have to maintain some emotional distance from.
- 26:15SPEAKER_00: And you can't be precious about it and be like, oh, my my copywriting didn't get conversions, oh, that's hurting my feelings.
- 26:21SPEAKER_00: You know, that really doesn't have any place in that process because you're being hired to produce a result for someone.
- 26:28SPEAKER_00: So that it's hard, it's hard, I think, for creative types to make that switch internally.
- 26:32SPEAKER_00: At least it's a challenge for me sometimes, I just confess.
- 26:36SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 26:37SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, and if it is, that's fine.
- 26:40SPEAKER_01: But here's so one of the other things I tell people is when something like that turns up, so a writing situation and you take it personal and you're saying to yourself, well, I shouldn't be taking it personal.
- 26:51SPEAKER_01: Well, first of all, stop shooting on yourself.
- 26:54SPEAKER_01: And and again, I just say get curious.
- 26:56SPEAKER_01: Have some grace with yourself and realize that something has been triggered inside of you.
- 27:02SPEAKER_01: And how do you want it, how do you want to handle it in the future?
- 27:06SPEAKER_01: What do you want it to look like in the future?
- 27:08SPEAKER_01: How would you like it to be different the next time?
- 27:10SPEAKER_01: What can you do to make it different the next time?
- 27:13SPEAKER_01: And even when doing things for writing, as we started talking going down that venue, I started thinking, oh, some people might that might bring up even more fear in them.
- 27:22SPEAKER_01: But we're all human beings.
- 27:24SPEAKER_01: And so if you just talk to the person that you're working with and you do your best to make things the best you can, that's that's what you can do.
- 27:33SPEAKER_01: You know, what are you responsible for?
- 27:35SPEAKER_01: You be responsible for what you're responsible for, and we can't control others or how they're gonna be.
- 27:42SPEAKER_01: We just get to choose how we're gonna respond to them.
- 27:45SPEAKER_01: But we do to if you want to choose how to respond to them, you might have to breathe and take a minute.
- 27:50SPEAKER_01: It's kind of like back to what we were talking about before.
- 27:53SPEAKER_01: Well, how do you know?
- 27:54SPEAKER_01: Is like take some time.
- 27:55SPEAKER_01: What's coming up?
- 27:56SPEAKER_01: Listen to yourself.
- 27:57SPEAKER_01: What is that internal talk?
- 27:58SPEAKER_01: What are the words that are coming up for you?
- 28:00SPEAKER_01: And is that what you want?
- 28:02SPEAKER_01: Is that how you want to live?
- 28:04SPEAKER_01: Or do you want a different result?
- 28:07SPEAKER_01: If you want a different result, be gracious to yourself, get curious, just like I was the same way, Kent, always asking questions.
- 28:14SPEAKER_01: I still do.
- 28:15SPEAKER_01: That's why that's what makes you a good coach is asking questions.
- 28:18SPEAKER_01: I just keep digging till I find something, right?
- 28:21SPEAKER_01: But um, you know, be curious with yourself and and start saying, Well, if I want a different outcome or if I want to respond differently, you know, what do I do next time?
- 28:33SPEAKER_01: Or this thing keeps coming up.
- 28:35SPEAKER_01: Where did that come from anyway?
- 28:37SPEAKER_01: Oh, okay.
- 28:38SPEAKER_01: So you can see where it came from, and now that it's, you know, however many years passed, you can look at it from a different perspective and you can write a new story about it, or just say, okay, I'm gonna get rid of that story.
- 28:51SPEAKER_01: And every time it comes up, just go, nope, I'm not living in that anymore.
- 28:54SPEAKER_01: I'm living in this.
- 28:56SPEAKER_01: Oh, so actually, this is one thing I think is really important for your listeners to hear.
- 29:01SPEAKER_01: I listened to that one episode you did on the your 2020 survey, yes, and money came up, money came up as an issue for people that they wanted, they didn't know how to make money from it.
- 29:13SPEAKER_00: Yes.
- 29:13SPEAKER_01: And um and some of the other things that you came, people, I think everybody ought to listen to that.
- 29:18SPEAKER_01: You did a great job of of surveying the results, but people came up with thinking that um that they didn't need help with the business part of things, and yet that was the thing that they were struggling with.
- 29:31SPEAKER_01: So, what what what happens there is a lot of people have a negative story about money.
- 29:41SPEAKER_01: So it could have come from their upbringing that the the family didn't have a lot of money, and the messaging that they got from the parents was a negative story on money.
- 29:50SPEAKER_01: Um, society gives us a negative story on money.
- 29:54SPEAKER_01: It a lot of the movies will portray the businessmen, the people who are providing the jobs and and adding to the economy as the bad guys because they have a lot of money.
- 30:04SPEAKER_01: Um churches uh portray money as a negative thing instead of just a tool that it is.
- 30:13SPEAKER_01: And so so many of us have this negative story about money.
- 30:18SPEAKER_01: So we really have to start getting curious about that, learning what it is and learning what's true, because you'll have this.
- 30:26SPEAKER_01: Well, we and this the technical term for it is a cognitive dissonance, and that's exactly what you recognized in your survey results.
- 30:36SPEAKER_01: That people were saying that they wanted money, but then they didn't want this help over here at the bottom end, and yet that's the very help that they needed for the money.
- 30:45SPEAKER_01: Until we get our money story rewritten and we don't view money as something negative to be avoided, we're not gonna be able to make the money, or we'll only be able to make a certain amount in our brain.
- 31:01SPEAKER_01: It that because that message, those negative messages about money have been uh put on autopilot.
- 31:07SPEAKER_01: And so until we uproot that and turn it around, we're gonna have this constant struggle with making more money with whatever it is that we're trying to because of that that underlying story that's running on autopilot that we don't even see.
- 31:24SPEAKER_00: Oh man, that that's that's like 10 episodes worth of stuff right there that we can unpack.
- 31:29SPEAKER_00: But to give it a little bit of context, what I'm uh what Valerie's talking about is a survey that I did um at the beginning of the year, and I did an episode, I forget what number episode it was.
- 31:39SPEAKER_00: I think it was 145 or 146.
- 31:41SPEAKER_00: Oh, well, actually it doesn't matter because I just took the numbers out of my episode titles.
- 31:44SPEAKER_00: So it was from like three months ago.
- 31:47SPEAKER_00: Now I'm totally confusing everybody.
- 31:49SPEAKER_00: But anyway, I I did kind of a postmortem on those survey results, and something I pointed out in that episode was very interesting to me.
- 31:57SPEAKER_00: That one of the the top things that people said they wanted in the survey, um, they said, I want to make money with my writing, but I don't know how.
- 32:06SPEAKER_00: So people said that was a big concern of theirs.
- 32:09SPEAKER_00: But then one of the lowest ranking things, in fact, this was tied for second place at at the bottom.
- 32:16SPEAKER_00: Um people said I I need motivation and accountability.
- 32:20SPEAKER_00: Sorry, I'm getting uh tongue tied.
- 32:23SPEAKER_00: They said I need motivation and accountability to reach my goals.
- 32:26SPEAKER_00: So I and I couldn't put those two things together because on the one hand, people were saying I I want to make more money with my writing, but then with the same breath, they were also saying that I don't need motivation and accountability because they ranked that so low on their perceived needs.
- 32:42SPEAKER_00: And it was that was very interesting to me because it was basically saying, Hey, I have this goal, but I don't need any help in reaching it.
- 32:48SPEAKER_00: So it was just it was really funny to me.
- 32:51SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
- 32:52SPEAKER_01: No, I thought you did a good job of of pulling that all together, and I and it's very true.
- 32:57SPEAKER_01: But as I was listening to that, I was thinking, Nina, that whole thing with the money story is huge.
- 33:02SPEAKER_01: It's been one that I've been working on, and I'm glad to say that I'm starting to make progress in that area, but it's it's just really interesting the things that you'll notice.
- 33:16SPEAKER_01: Um, even like saying I can't afford it, right?
- 33:20SPEAKER_01: That's kind of a negative message that a lot of us would say.
- 33:25SPEAKER_01: But a more positive way to do it would say, uh, I'm gonna choose not to invest in that right now.
- 33:30SPEAKER_01: That's not where I'm choosing to invest my money right now.
- 33:34SPEAKER_01: So, right, because the reality is if we really wanted it, we would go get it whether we could afford it or not.
- 33:41SPEAKER_00: Yes, that's true.
- 33:42SPEAKER_00: Yeah, like if you're if your child was dying, you know, uh of cancer, and unfortunately some of our listeners have had children taken from them, or they've had other really, really serious issues.
- 33:55SPEAKER_00: When you have a serious issue like that, I mean you will move heaven and earth to make something possible.
- 34:02SPEAKER_00: So, yeah, you're exactly right.
- 34:03SPEAKER_00: It's not really a matter of affording something, it's a matter of that's not a priority on the list.
- 34:12SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so that's that's a that's a real important one for them to want to move forward.
- 34:19SPEAKER_01: And I think too really defining what is it that you want and and why do you want it?
- 34:26SPEAKER_01: Why is it important?
- 34:28SPEAKER_01: Right?
- 34:28SPEAKER_01: You're like you just said, a family member's life is in danger.
- 34:32SPEAKER_01: You want it because you love them and you want them around.
- 34:35SPEAKER_01: I think a lot of times, too, why people will say things like, I'm too busy or I'll do it later, and and things like that, is because um it's they haven't really determined why it's important.
- 34:49SPEAKER_01: And if they haven't determined why it's important, then the brain does its job because it has to function this whole body.
- 34:56SPEAKER_01: It does its job and says, Okay, well, yeah that that there's no reason behind why that's important.
- 35:01SPEAKER_01: It hasn't automated that important the importance of getting to that.
- 35:06SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's great.
- 35:07SPEAKER_00: Well, I'm glad you mentioned that because that that kind of leads us to to the final thing that I want to throw out there is just can you give us a little bit about this idea of clarity?
- 35:18SPEAKER_00: Because I feel like in many ways that that colors the whole discussion.
- 35:22SPEAKER_00: If we don't know what we want and why we should want it, then really everything else becomes much harder because we don't have that clarity about where we're going and the direction that we're heading.
- 35:31SPEAKER_00: So I know you have something for our listeners related to that, and anything else that you want to say about that would be amazing as well.
- 35:37SPEAKER_01: Okay, yeah.
- 35:38SPEAKER_01: So with a lot of these reasons that you're um that you know you were sharing with me as to why uh they're not able to be successful, or they're afraid they're gonna fail, or um things aren't good enough, or I'm too busy, I'll do it later.
- 35:57SPEAKER_01: All of those things, when all those things come up, is really needing to examine well, why is this, whatever the this is, whether it's writing or anything else in your life, why is this important?
- 36:09SPEAKER_01: And you don't want to stop at the first why, because the first why is usually the superficial why, the one that is safe to say to other people in public.
- 36:21SPEAKER_01: But we need to ask ourselves why again and again.
- 36:24SPEAKER_01: And sometimes you need to go three or five whys deep.
- 36:28SPEAKER_01: So why is it important?
- 36:30SPEAKER_01: I mean, you can sometimes for a while there I was dealing with something I don't still not sure what it was.
- 36:35SPEAKER_01: It's like, why is it important to get out of bed right now?
- 36:39SPEAKER_01: You know, it could be as simple as that, but but really digging deep, why is this important?
- 36:46SPEAKER_01: And when you get to the reason, well, let's just use a book as an example.
- 36:50SPEAKER_01: If somebody's writing a book, whatever the topic is, why is it important to write that book?
- 36:55SPEAKER_01: And why is that important?
- 36:57SPEAKER_01: And then why is that important and why is that important?
- 36:59SPEAKER_01: When we when you do that three to five times, then you're gonna get really clear.
- 37:05SPEAKER_01: And once you have that clarity, it's kind of like having something set on the GPS, right?
- 37:11SPEAKER_01: Now you know where to go.
- 37:13SPEAKER_01: If you don't have that set, then the GPS doesn't know where to take you, right?
- 37:18SPEAKER_01: It's just sitting there because you haven't given it a destination.
- 37:22SPEAKER_01: And even if you start getting off track, there's sometimes more than one way to do it, right?
- 37:27SPEAKER_01: So you might have a destination and start that way and you get off track and you start going and it says rerouting, rerouting, right?
- 37:33SPEAKER_01: It keeps trying to get you back.
- 37:34SPEAKER_01: So even if you do get distracted by things or things come up in life, or like uh like this is our unique season that we're in now, it doesn't take long for you to be able to get back on track again and continue to pursue that because all of us were affected, you know, by the emotions and the things going on, and we still will be, you know, things are gonna come up for quite a while as a result of this.
- 37:58SPEAKER_01: And so we may get off track emotionally for whatever whatever reason, whatever trigger comes up.
- 38:04SPEAKER_01: But if we have that clarity, then we can move back because we have that destination in mind.
- 38:11SPEAKER_01: So really deciding is this something that they want to do for themselves and why it's important, or is it somebody else's agenda or somebody told them to do it, and that's why they're doing it.
- 38:22SPEAKER_01: And if it if it's not that important, then their brain is gonna be working against them.
- 38:28SPEAKER_01: They're gonna be trying to move one way, but the brain's gonna move another way because they haven't told it why it's important, it hasn't given it anything to grasp on to.
- 38:36SPEAKER_01: So one of the things that I have, the thing that I have for your listeners is it's um uh it's a clarity challenge.
- 38:46SPEAKER_01: It's uh an exercise that I do, it's a simple clarity.
- 38:50SPEAKER_01: Um, I go deeper with people in another thing, but this one it's um the address for it, it's a bit.ly uh bit.ly vp listen.
- 39:02SPEAKER_01: And if they go to that and do that challenge, so normally I just that's my opt-in that we're talking about.
- 39:09SPEAKER_01: But what I want to do for your listeners is after they complete the task, if they'll message me and let me know that they completed it and they listened to to this podcast, then I'll go ahead and schedule a time with them to go over their results, what they came up with a little bit deeper, like a half hour or so, and uh go a little deeper with them on that.
- 39:32SPEAKER_00: Oh, that's great.
- 39:34SPEAKER_00: I appreciate that.
- 39:35SPEAKER_00: What is the address again, just so uh we make sure that we have it correct?
- 39:39SPEAKER_01: Sure, it's bit.ly bit dot ly forward slash VP for Valerie Pugsley and listen because they were listening to us on the Kent Sanders show.
- 39:52SPEAKER_00: Cool.
- 39:53SPEAKER_00: I love it.
- 39:54SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you.
- 39:55SPEAKER_00: That's uh that's an extremely generous gift.
- 39:57SPEAKER_00: So I hope everybody takes Valerie up on that.
- 40:00SPEAKER_00: Maybe not everybody, because then your schedule is going to be overwhelmed, but but a lot of people.
- 40:05SPEAKER_01: Only the action takers will, because they first have to complete the challenge and then they have to take the step of sending me a message.
- 40:12SPEAKER_01: So if they're an action taker and they're serious about wanting to move forward in their life with their writing or anything else, they'll take the steps and then I can help them.
- 40:23SPEAKER_01: If they don't take action, neither of us can help them.
- 40:27SPEAKER_01: But hopefully the things we told them today will help them start addressing some of those underlying automated messages, stories.
- 40:35SPEAKER_01: We'll use stories here, right?
- 40:37SPEAKER_01: The stories that are running their life, and they can start writing, rewriting that story as well as the things they're writing on paper.
- 40:46SPEAKER_00: Man, there's been so much good stuff in this.
- 40:48SPEAKER_00: I uh this is one of the reasons why I do podcast interviews, is because I feel like I always learn something.
- 40:54SPEAKER_00: This isn't just a thing where I have guests on and just want to pump out content.
- 40:58SPEAKER_00: I secretly, my my real reason for doing shows is so I can connect with cool people and do on-air counseling for me.
- 41:06SPEAKER_00: So no, I'm just kidding.
- 41:07SPEAKER_00: It's not it's not really on air counseling.
- 41:09SPEAKER_00: But it is in a way because I am receiving counsel and wisdom from friends, from new and old friends that I really respect and admire.
- 41:15SPEAKER_00: So, Valerie, I really appreciate you taking time to do this.
- 41:18SPEAKER_00: This has been wonderful.
- 41:20SPEAKER_00: I've taken a ton of notes, and uh man, you've given us lots and lots of value, so I appreciate that.
- 41:26SPEAKER_01: Oh, thank you.
- 41:27SPEAKER_01: I'm so happy to do that.
- 41:28SPEAKER_01: That's one of my goals every day is to add value to the world.
- 41:32SPEAKER_01: So if I've done that, I it's a successful day for me.
- 41:35SPEAKER_00: So, what's the best way that our listeners can connect with you and find out about all the cool work that you're doing?
- 41:41SPEAKER_01: Um, well, the best way is for them to take advantage of that link that we gave them earlier, because they can we can connect there.
- 41:49SPEAKER_01: But they uh you can find me online if you just uh Google my name, Valerie Pugsley.
- 41:55SPEAKER_01: Um inspired at Strategic Solutions is my website.
- 42:00SPEAKER_01: Um I'm on all most of the socials, the main ones.
- 42:05SPEAKER_01: Um, but yeah, through the the VP Listen is is the best way that I can serve them the best.
- 42:11SPEAKER_00: Cool.
- 42:12SPEAKER_00: That's fantastic.
- 42:13SPEAKER_00: Well, Valerie, thanks again, and um I just really appreciate your time today.
- 42:18SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
- 42:19SPEAKER_01: Thank you for having me.
- 42:21SPEAKER_01: It's been a pleasure to be on here and to get to know you a little better.
- 42:26SPEAKER_00: Well, I loved this conversation.
- 42:28SPEAKER_00: That was a real blast, and I learned a ton from Valerie.
- 42:31SPEAKER_00: Let me boil it down, as I always do, to my three biggest takeaways.
- 42:37SPEAKER_00: Number one, we need to look at the world differently.
- 42:41SPEAKER_00: Valerie talked about developing a growth mindset versus having a fixed mindset, and part of this is all about looking at the things happening around you in life.
- 42:51SPEAKER_00: For example, do you see yourself as a victim?
- 42:54SPEAKER_00: Do you think everything happens to you?
- 42:57SPEAKER_00: Or do you perceive that everything happens for you?
- 43:01SPEAKER_00: This is a really important distinction.
- 43:03SPEAKER_00: When you perceive that life is happening for you, everything is a chance to grow.
- 43:08SPEAKER_00: And every problem or frustration is a chance to learn and to succeed at a higher level.
- 43:14SPEAKER_00: Number two, the word fail means first attempt at learning.
- 43:20SPEAKER_00: And I love this insight from Valerie.
- 43:22SPEAKER_00: You know, we're always afraid that we're going to fail.
- 43:25SPEAKER_00: But what is failure really?
- 43:28SPEAKER_00: Failure, I believe, is just a construct in our minds.
- 43:32SPEAKER_00: Now, just hang with me for a second because I want to explain what I mean.
- 43:36SPEAKER_00: There really is no such thing as failure.
- 43:39SPEAKER_00: The only thing that exists is a series of events that we perceive.
- 43:43SPEAKER_00: And we can frame those as success or we can frame those as failure.
- 43:48SPEAKER_00: But really, when it comes down to it, there's just a sequence of events, and we can we can say, well, that was failure, or that was success.
- 43:55SPEAKER_00: So failure is nothing more than a label that we assign to An action or a series of actions or the results of actions.
- 44:04SPEAKER_00: So when you think that you have failed, it just means that you need to learn more or to change something.
- 44:09SPEAKER_00: So failing is really a sign that you're trying and you're making some progress.
- 44:15SPEAKER_00: By the way, I've talked to two or three writers in the last few weeks who have at least one finished book just sitting there unpublished.
- 44:23SPEAKER_00: In other words, they've written a whole book, but they haven't done anything with it.
- 44:27SPEAKER_00: They're afraid it's not good enough.
- 44:29SPEAKER_00: So they keep on tinkering with it, or they're waiting for some kind of spiritual sign to give them the go-ahead.
- 44:34SPEAKER_00: You know, they're waiting for God to tell them it's the right time to release the book or something like that.
- 44:39SPEAKER_00: And I think that's kind of crazy.
- 44:41SPEAKER_00: I mean, I guess maybe God does communicate in that way sometimes, and maybe God does tell some people to hold off on writing a book or to write a book or whatever.
- 44:52SPEAKER_00: But my personal opinion is that the only sign that you need to move ahead with your writing is the fact that you want to do it.
- 45:00SPEAKER_00: Or as Jeff Foxworthy says, here's your sign.
- 45:04SPEAKER_00: I don't think you need some big sign from God.
- 45:06SPEAKER_00: I think God has already given you the sign by giving you that impulse and the desire to write.
- 45:11SPEAKER_00: I mean, what other sign do you need?
- 45:13SPEAKER_00: If you want to write and you have a message to share, that's all the sign from God that you need to get that book out there.
- 45:21SPEAKER_00: So maybe it's not a matter of waiting for God to give us a sign.
- 45:25SPEAKER_00: Maybe it's a matter of maybe God is waiting for you to pull the trigger so he can start blessing people with your book.
- 45:32SPEAKER_00: So that's just like a change in perspective.
- 45:35SPEAKER_00: It's not an issue of we're waiting on God for some magic sign.
- 45:39SPEAKER_00: Maybe God's waiting on us just to take action and get our book out there in the world so he can finally start blessing people with it.
- 45:46SPEAKER_00: Then finally, takeaway number three is don't compare your work to others.
- 45:51SPEAKER_00: Now, this is something I wrestle with sometimes, and don't we all wrestle with this?
- 45:55SPEAKER_00: We all wrestle with comparison and feeling like we don't measure up to other people's standards and so forth.
- 46:01SPEAKER_00: When it comes to writing specifically, it's easy to worry that people are going to take our book and then hold it up to some other famous person's book and go, nope, it's not good enough.
- 46:10SPEAKER_00: It doesn't measure up.
- 46:11SPEAKER_00: Because that's, I mean, I'm just being honest with you, that's what I tend to do in the privacy of my own home office.
- 46:17SPEAKER_00: You know, I see the book that I'm working on that's sort of messy, it's not totally finished being edited and uh and all that stuff.
- 46:24SPEAKER_00: But then I look at all the hundreds of published books in my office and I go, well, it's not as good as that one, or not as good as that one, and the cover, you know, the the cover that I have in mind isn't as good as that one or whatever else.
- 46:37SPEAKER_00: So we can't do that.
- 46:39SPEAKER_00: That doesn't really help anything.
- 46:43SPEAKER_00: It's just an illusion.
- 46:44SPEAKER_00: People don't actually take our book and hold it up to somebody else's book and go, uh, that person's book is not quite good enough.
- 46:52SPEAKER_00: At least I don't do that with people people with people's books.
- 46:55SPEAKER_00: I take a book on its own terms and I find something that is good about it.
- 47:00SPEAKER_00: Even if somebody gives me a book or I buy a book and the interior design or layout is bad, the formatting is bad, or the writing is mediocre, or there's something that I perceive that's not that great about the book, there's almost always something I can take away from it.
- 47:14SPEAKER_00: So the net effect of a book, unless it's just like a really horrible book, the net effect of a book is almost always positive.
- 47:22SPEAKER_00: So don't compare yourself to other people because you're not running the same race.
- 47:27SPEAKER_00: There's only one race you're expected to run, and that's your own race.
- 47:32SPEAKER_00: Well, I want to give a huge thank you to my special guest, Valerie Pugsley.
- 47:36SPEAKER_00: Make sure to check out her site at inspired strategic solutions.com.
- 47:42SPEAKER_00: And as Valerie mentioned, she also has uh a special gift for smart business writing listeners.
- 47:48SPEAKER_00: It's a clarity challenge, which you can get by going to bit.ly slash VP listen, and that link will be in the show notes.
- 47:59SPEAKER_00: Once you've completed that challenge, message Valerie to let her know that you completed it, and she'll schedule a time to go over the results with you.
- 48:06SPEAKER_00: And as always, thank you for listening.
- 48:08SPEAKER_00: I appreciate the fact that you're checking out the show, and I hope that you found some value in this.
- 48:12SPEAKER_00: You can find lots more resources for writers at KentSanders.net.
- 48:17SPEAKER_00: And until next time, remember that your writing has the power to change people's lives.
- 48:22SPEAKER_00: I'll see you in the next episode.