Latest / Walk Talk: Faith in Motion / Testimony of Bryanna Goodmon

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Testimony of Bryanna Goodmon · Walk Talk: Faith in Motion

• Randy: All right. So hey Brianna, thank you so much for joining us today. before we get started with you kind of giving us your background and your testimony and what your walk with Christ is like today, why don't we start with you just telling us a little bit about yourself, who you are, and what do you do? Bryanna: so a little bit about myself. I grew up in the Midwest Kansas City area. let's see. I currently am a nervous system regulation coach. I work primarily with business owners, leaders, and entrepreneurs. Basically, they're going to their next level of growth and they are tired of the self-sabotage. So that is what I help with. I guess like a little bit more about my background. I grew up Being around like the Baptist Lutheran Church, the Catholic Church, just based on what my grandparents did. Every now and then I had some school friends that would invite me to, you know, maybe a church down the road. but as far as actually knowing Jesus and having a personal relationship with God, I really didn't have that. I kind of just, you know, went, because it was almost like expected. Pj Verdin: Right. Bryanna: So I was familiar, you know, with the Bible verses, you know, like the the rituals, ceremonies, like whatever, you know, is done in like certain churches. you know, Easter Sundays, like all that type of stuff, but didn't really, have a relationship at that Randy: Right, right. Bryanna: point in my time. Randy: Gotcha, Pj Verdin: Mm-hmm. Randy: gotcha. Now let me back up just a little bit 'cause you mentioned your title and it's not something I ever heard before. I don't know, brother, if you've heard of that one before. Was it nervous system reg say it again? Okay, so tell us more what about what that means. Bryanna: Yeah, nervous system regulation coach. So Pj Verdin: Wow. Bryanna: have you ever gone into a let's say a networking situation, right? And all of a sudden your palms are sweaty, you are overthinking like Yeah, exactly, mom spaghetti. Like all the things. Pj Verdin: Knees weak, arms are heavy. Sorry. Sorry. Yeah, that's right, that's right. Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: Well, that's like your nervous system coming online and it's just like I don't know, I'm kind of freaking out. This is an unfamiliar situation. I've never done this exact situation Randy: Right. Bryanna: before. Or it reminds me of another time when I failed, or when I was criticized, or when I, you know, wasn't, you know, accepted by others. And so your nervous system has all these stories embedded in it. And it is, Randy: Mm. Bryanna: it's talking, it's going, and your body is responding to your environment. So as a business owner, a leader, an entrepreneur. being able to have more of a handle on what your body is reacting to is huge because you're either going Randy: Mm. Bryanna: to collapse to your next level of success or you're able to recognize the moment that you're in, regulate through it, and move through with conscious action in your next steps. Randy: Gotcha. Okay. Well, no, I think that makes perfect sense. And what I'm hearing you say is that when I stand in front of a group of people and I just sweat profusely, it's probably because of one time growing up where I was just sweating in when I was under the gun and now my body just reacts that way every time. So I might need some some coaching through that. My body remembers. Bryanna: Yep, your body remembers. Yeah. Pj Verdin: Right. So d does that kinda have any any kind of ties or correlation with like EMDR therapy? Like that Bryanna: I'm not too familiar with EMDR therapy. is that like the what is it? Randy: Yeah, what's that, brother? Bryanna: Like the sound sound stuff? Or is that ASMR? ASMR Pj Verdin: Well well it's it's it's the Randy: Yeah, that I was what I was thinking too. A S A S R. What's the what's the one you mentioned, P? Pj Verdin: the so the the Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Pj Verdin: it's like man, it it's for the like you said, you know, your emotions have like these stories and these triggers and it's it's something to do with like an eye like therapy or whatever, or like to like you Yes, the eye movement thing and Bryanna: Old eye movements. Okay. Pj Verdin: then like you you like while you're doing it you're remembering traumatic things to kind of relate I don't know. It it's I'm not too familiar with it. I just heard of it. And so whenever you were kind of talking about like how, you know, we have these kind of like codes and these emotions from situations where things have happened. I just I wasn't sure if there was any kind of tie. So anyways. Bryanna: I actually heard Miley Cyrus talk about this when she was talking about a moment where she like went back to when she was like with her mom or her dad or something and or her grandma. And like while they're in this session, like they're walking through it like as like her eye patterning is moving. It's similar because you're going into the limbic system, the part of your body that actually stores memory and trauma. So that whole part is like what you're tapping into and you're going in and you're like reprogramming. So you can use like the rapid eye movement, like the EMDR. I think that's like the muscular like eye movement that they're talking about in it. but Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: it primarily focuses on that technique, whereas nervous system regulation, we're looking at, okay, the whole body. So, you know. Do you are your palms sweaty? do you feel like a racing in your chest? Like do you feel, you know, a pit in your stomach? do you feel like a fluttering like in your knees? Like you're focusing on any sensation that comes up in the body, not just specifically going back like through a memory and focusing on like repatterning with the eye movement. so Pj Verdin: Gotcha. Bryanna: it's it's a lot more broad because when we talk about nervous system regulation in work. It's just energy that's in the body that didn't get a chance to fully process emotionally. So that's what we're just going back to is any part of time where, okay, shoot, that got stuck in my gut. And now every time, you know, I walk into a room and I'm afraid I'm gonna be criticized, like I have this complete gut punch feeling. So yeah, that's kinda we kind of Pj Verdin: Interesting. Right. Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: go and focus on everything that comes up in the body. Pj Verdin: That really, really interesting. Yeah. Randy: It is interesting. It reminds me, I read a book, I don't know, it was a long time ago, on neurolinguistic programming. And that's what it reminds Bryanna: Mm. Randy: me of, which is all about the mind-body connection and how, you know, if you ever worked a telemarketing sales job, which I have, they tell you smile, Bryanna: Yeah. Randy: make sure you smile when you answer the phone because people could hear your smile. And so neurolinguistic programming is all about Bryanna: Yeah. Randy: how your body affects your mind and your mind affects your body and like you could literally improve your mood. Just by like body postures and things like that. It's it's what it reminds me of. I don't know how related it but Pj Verdin: Hundred percent. Yeah. Bryanna: Yeah. Pj Verdin: fearfully and Bryanna: It's Pj Verdin: wonderfully made is all I I keep hearing. Fearfully and wonderfully made. Yeah. Randy: There you go. Bryanna: Well, it's all interconnected. it's really kind of cool because when I before I even got into deep nervous system work, I started in on all sorts of different modalities for personal development because I was like, I don't even know. I'm just trying it all, right? So, you know, the EFT tapping, the NLP. NLP, or what was the other one? man, it's R E B T, so rational emotive behavioral therapy. So that is going in and taking like a belief that like let's say we're just talk one where it's most common, like let's say your partner is like abusing you like v verbally and you're like, my gosh, they have to stop this. Like if they don't, like I'm gonna be miserable. And it's taking that thought process and it's you know taking you out of like a negative fear spiral that you can't change anything. Like when you realize like you can't change their behavior, you're kind of like going back like step by step in the emotional like programming of it and changing your beliefs and your patterning. So that's when you come in with like the NLP and realizing your words, they have power to help you like figure out, okay, what do I want to tell myself internally? What do I want to think about myself so that I can Well one, feel better, but two, like I don't feel like either I'm such a failure or that I can't do the things that I say that I want to do. so it's all really Randy: Mm. Self talk. Bryanna: interconnected. It's really cool. Randy: Gotcha. Okay, well, cool. Well, thanks for giving us a little bit of education on that front. Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Randy: Now, you did mention a little bit about your background growing up in KC and a little bit of your you know exposure to Christianity early on, but tell us more about what life was like growing up, what was faith like in your household? Did you guys go to church? Did you grow up in a household where faith was important? I mean, what are you whatever you're willing to share about your upbringing, just so we have a little bit of a background of the before versus the after? tell us about, you know, your early life. Bryanna: early life, so my parents were military and when they got out, we moved from North Carolina to Kansas City. my grandparents on both sides of my family, they were very religious. My mom's side was Catholic. so my papa and my nana, we would go to Catholic church with them when we were up in New York on Sundays. And Wednesdays, like we stayed with them for like a whole summer or a couple summers and that's what we would do is we would go there, we were involved. and like we would, you know, do the prayers and everything like that. We'd pray every night before we went to sleep. But as like a, you know, seven or eight year old, like you don't quite have a concept of God yet unless like you're really like informed. It was just something that we did. So it was kind of like, what is that? Like where you're Randy: A ritual routine. Bryanna: kind of just in like mundane, yeah. Pj Verdin: It's your it was your routine, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Bryanna: Just in mundane routine. Mm-hmm. So it wasn't really like the questioning of like, who's God? who's Jesus? Who's Mary? Like you weren't really asking those questions. And to be completely honest, in Catholic Church, I would probably fall asleep about half the time 'cause, you know, I was a kid and I was like, you know, it's a little it's a little mundane. It's the same thing. Like we go through the same same stuff like week by week. Randy: That's why Catholic church churches are so quiet. I mean, I go to Pentecostal, I go to all kinds of different churches. I hear people talking nonstop and it's silence in the Catholic Church. That's probably why everyone's sleeping. Bryanna: Yeah. Pj Verdin: Well, that's why they make those pews Bryanna: Yeah, I was I was definitely sleepy. Pj Verdin: yeah, they make those pews so uncomfortable, man. So you can't get it you can't catch a good little siesta. Yeah, it's that's rough. Randy: So you try to prevent it. Bryanna: They're like, wake up, you can't sleep before God. Pj Verdin: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bryanna: So yeah, that was like a lot of my my Catholic experience. And then when we would spend some times like some of the summers, like the summers that we weren't in New York, we would be down in like central Missouri in that area, and we were with my my grandma on my dad's side. And they were like my great great grandma, she was a Mormon, but then my great grandma, she was Baptist Lutheran. So every, you know, you know, a couple Sundays or whatnot, we would go to church. It wasn't like every Sunday because we'd have to drive back up to Kansas City, but there were some Sundays where we were down there and we would, you know, go to Easter Sunday service or we'd, you know, do that. And then that was, you know, a little more active. We were in Sunday school. And then, you know, my parents, they had us, I remember one year we did like vacation Bible school. or one or two years. We I know we did that a couple of times. And so it's like I really I remember like moments from those times, but I don't really remember ever having that personal relationship with Jesus. I was never like, like let me th I know that if I'm, you know, in trouble or like if I I need healing or I need help or I need someone to talk to. My first thought wasn't to go to Jesus. Like that wasn't part of it. It was just kind of like, this is a thing we did. And then outside of that, it wasn't really integrated. I know my dad Randy: Mm. Bryanna: is a God fearing man, but I don't really know about my mom, to be completely honest. because her mom was Buddhist and everything, but I'm pretty sure my mom believes in God. I just don't know if she's accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior. But it's just Pj Verdin: Yeah. Randy: W well that's a good psych Bryanna: kind of one of those things. Randy: sorry, go ahead. Bryanna: It's just kinda one of those things. You don't really I guess you don't really think to ask your parents those questions. Randy: Right, right. Well, you know, I I've I've heard it said before, maybe you have too, that if you can't remember, you know, when you first accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, it's possible that you never have. so it's it's interesting that you you bring that up about your mom. but let's let's let's jump to, you know, when you first accepted Christ and maybe leading up to that, if there was anything interesting going on beforehand that you want to share, Tell us about what your life was like, kind of leading up to and then, you know, what how were you introduced to Jesus like when you finally accepted him? Bryanna: so my parents, they were, you know, classic divorce parents, right? always arguing, you know, got married because of the kids type of thing, and then they eventually parted ways. But one of the things that kind of led me during that time when I was either in and out of church, like with friends, stuff like that. was I was I was drinking and I was using drugs a lot 'cause I was like, I don't want to feel anything. I don't want to hear my parents argue. I don't wanna hear them, you know, not s or say like I don't love you. Like I didn't want to deal with it. And so I kinda put all of those memories, like suppress, suppress, suppress, behind drugs and alcohol. So from the age of like fifteen, fourteen, fifteen, all the way up until my late twenties, I was an avid like user of alcohol and drugs. And so I'm like, okay, well, I wasn't really aware, like consciously aware, you know, of anything really spiritual, until I was probably about twenty twenty two, twenty-three years old. And then I started, kind of questioning things 'cause I was like, well, I mean, you know, I was interested in hearing, you know, about some of the stuff like, you know, aliens and like witchcraft and like all that type of stuff. And I started questioning. but I didn't really like dive too deep until I got separated from my husband at the time. And I he's like a he's a nihilist, so he doesn't believe in anything. So I'm like, okay, well, that really didn't give me a strong spiritual foundation to go with, so I was already tempted and tempted down like, you know, these curious paths, like the mis the mysterious, the occult, like the witchcraft, you know, all of the intergalactic stuff that people talk about these days in new age spirituality. And so I went down this path in my twenties, probably say about like 24, 23, 24 around there. And during that time, all the way up until a little less than a year ago, I was still actively in that. I was reading Pj Verdin: Wow. Bryanna: Oracle cards. I was, you know, doing Randy: wow. Bryanna: like candle rituals and stuff like that. didn't really do a lot of spell work per se, like you know, enchantments and stuff like that, other than like, you know, writing down manifestations and then like, you know, praying to like the s the earth spirits and stuff like that. And it wasn't until I had I was working at Hotworks with my friend Gina. she was with she was with Hotworks and she was doing water. Yay! Randy: G Gina Potter, the same the same Gina that we interviewed a few few months back. Okay, all right. We remember Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: Yeah, Gina, the one. Randy: Gina, yeah. Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: The woman, the myth, the legend. That's the one. The water girl. So Gina is Randy: So so so so sorry, go ahead. Yeah, tell us about Gina and then I have a I have a question for you on something you said a second ago. Bryanna: Yeah. So Gina is actually the one who when we were we were both in New Age spirituality. And we when we came together, we initially met each other and then like spent months apart like while we were still figuring out the last of our, you know, new age witchcraft nonsense. And then we got to this place where we were working together. And then we were with each other all the time. And so we started just asking these deeper questions. But we had other people in Randy: Mm. Bryanna: our water community that were already walking with Christ. And so that kind of like was the introduction our friend Ember was starting to like ask these, you know, more spiritual questions about like, you know, I mean, do you believe in Jesus? Like what's your relationship with God? Pj Verdin: Amen. Bryanna: And so that's kind of like the the doorway that, you know, we finally like heard Jesus knock in and finally answered the door. And Pj Verdin: Amen. Bryanna: so Randy: Mm. Bryanna: that's like it's kind of weird how it all came about because we were both like in in the crafts and stuff like that and then after working together. Randy: So you guys were both into that sort of stuff before you met each other. You're both into kind of new age Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Yep. Randy: occult type of stuff in on your own right. Bryanna: Yep, on our own. And then Randy: Okay. Bryanna: from the first time we met each other until we came back together again, it had almost Randy: Okay. Bryanna: been a year. so we were still doing separate things until we started working together. And even when we were working together in the beginning, we were still like doing, you know, some of the, you know, witchcraft stuff together, like, you know, candle rituals, stuff like that. Interesting. Randy: Sure. So so two things you mentioned I want to ask about what do you mean by writing manifestations and tell me more about the Bryanna: Even Randy: earth spirit? So I'm familiar with manifestation. We've talked about that before on the podcast, but what do you mean by writing manifestations? Bryanna: So in New Age spirituality, it is basically what what people who are walking with Christ would say is giving your prayers to God similar, but you are being very vague when it comes to manifestation. Because in manifestation culture, spirit new age spirituality culture, you have a belief that you are God in place of God. And so The whole saying is you are the creator of your own reality. So if you're the creator of your own reality, you can literally script and write what you want to come to fruition versus Randy: okay. Bryanna: acknowledging that God is a higher power and you are, you know, under his authority and through him and through Jesus, like that is where the power is, versus me self sourcing power, and I am the only one that can create anything. And so there's this level Randy: Okay. Bryanna: of responsibility that happens internally that's like I take on the responsibility of everything. And that is Randy: Sure. Bryanna: just a place of anxiety that I swear like you could never you could never meditate enough, breathe enough, do any exercise or yoga enough to like get rid of. Randy: So it sounds like this is not just writing down your goals for the next year, three years, five years. Bryanna: Mm. Randy: This sounds like this is a level deeper than that. Bryanna: Yeah. It's a lot deeper than that because it's like you write down like, I have a I have a five thousand dollar a month like income and like it just comes to me without having to do anything. You know, like you're you're writing the script as if you're like a a you're that you yourself are the movie writer versus God being the movie writer. So it's Randy: Gotcha. You're the you're a genie. You're just gonna grant yourself whatever you need. Okay. Okay. Bryanna: Right, right. And so like then you have no personal relationship with God because if you believe you're God, then why would you Randy: Right. Bryanna: why would you need one? Why would you even need saving? Because that whole manifestation Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: and new age culture, they teach self sourcing, your power and responsibility, so much so to the point where you don't believe that you need a savior. And that I think is the biggest like issue because When you accept God level responsibility, you also accept what God also has to deal with. And that is everything Pj Verdin: Right. Randy: Right. Bryanna: in the unseen realms. And that is what Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: I dealt a lot with. I had a lot of very dark encounters with several entities, like over my time, like in witchcraft. Even when I was younger, some well. Randy: Are these the earth spirits? Are these those earth spirits you mentioned? Bryanna: So it's kind of funny because after coming to Christ, you realize that any spirit, like you don't actually know exactly who it is or what it is. because Pj Verdin: Right. Bryanna: when you're knocking on that door, like using cards, candles, invoking spirits, you are you are casting your net into a very vague ocean and you don't know what you're gonna catch. You don't know what's gonna come to you, you don't know what's like on the other side of that door, and you have no control over it because your name Doesn't have authority, Jesus Christ's name has authority over that realm and that dominion. So that's where you get yourself into playing with, you know, you're like, I'm just talking to the fairies. And it's like, yeah, they're probably, you know, demonic spirits just romping and playing around. And you just invited a bunch of them into your personal space. And Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: you you think it's innocent because ultimately, like, our body and what we think, like our mind thinks is. self-preservation and we only do things that are going to benefit us, right? So we think we're like we're doing good by, I'm gonna talk to Gaia, the earth spirit. So you know Randy: That's the only one I would have been able to name was Gaia. That's why when you said spirits, I was like, okay, there's more than just the one. Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Well, well, even in Hawaiian culture, they have Pele, which is like a basically like a volcano fire, like goddess spirit. And so like when you go to places like Hawaii, like in their culture and their folklore and everything like that, you're talking about like in Moana, you know, the big like fiery, you know, spirit, like that is Pele. That's the representation of Pele. So she could be the Earth spirit, but also she was like part fire like volcano spirit and so Randy: Gotcha. Bryanna: when you're you're talking about like basically giving authority to creation over creator your source is wrong like it's off you're Randy: Mm. Bryanna: just you're Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: not like in the right spiritual authority and that's where that's where we found we were like we were we were idolizing the earth as a spirit and a being rather than God creating it. And Randy: Yeah. Pj Verdin: Right. Bryanna: even with the word universe, like a lot Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: of people in the New Age spirituality culture, like we would say, thank you, universe, or thank you, whatever. And we were basically idolizing creation, what God created Randy: Mm. Bryanna: over creator. Randy: Taking the the person, the personality, Pj Verdin: Hundred percent. Randy: the the being behind Bryanna: Is it? Randy: it, the relationship out of it is what it sounds like. Yeah. Pj Verdin: Yeah, intimate part of it of it. And and that's what I was Bryanna: Yep. Yeah. It it's yeah. It's basically like not Pj Verdin: what I was gonna say whenever Bryanna: wanting responsibility. Pj Verdin: Right. Well, Randy: Right. Pj Verdin: but to your point earlier, whenever you said, you know, it's like you you whenever you become your own God, you have to assume hi the those same responsibilities. And that was my first thought was like, Well, you're gonna have all that responsibility with no authority whatsoever and that's a that's a scary and dangerous Bryanna: Exactly. Pj Verdin: dangerous place to be. And Randy: That's the yep. Bryanna: It's very dangerous. it's so it's so dangerous. Pj Verdin: And and I think I I think that that's that's pretty common like with a lot of just indigenous people in general, cultures all over the world. I mean, Native Americans believe in in, you know, everything has a spirit and and the whole nine Bryanna: Right. Pj Verdin: and and and and so you know what I mean? Like I think it it's just I think that it's little whispers in our ear that that, you know, just just it well over time, you know, unless unless the truth is revealed, then it's just what you know and it it seems normal and natural and it seems almost respectful in a way, you know what I mean, of just acknowledging all the things around you and being thankful, but but ultimately you're Bryanna: Yeah. Pj Verdin: you're ignoring the like you said, the creator, in lieu of the creation. So Bryanna: and it's interesting that you say the Native American side of things because I have Native American roots like within my lineage as well. So I got really curious and I that's why I was like, like I want to, you know, live more like my ancestors did. But then I have to recognize I'm like, they probably didn't know anything about God or Jesus at all. Pj Verdin: Right, right. Randy: Right. Bryanna: And so understanding now, I'm like, like that's why, you know, you'll hear people like go into these ayahuasca ceremonies and like all this other stuff. And it's just blasting open the double doors to like any anything in demonic nature to like just come through. Randy: yeah. Pj Verdin: Hundred percent. Randy: So so so you started to mention earlier about interactions with some of these spirits or demons before you met Christ. So so tell us more about Bryanna: Mm. Mm-hmm. Randy: that. What kind of interactions did you have and how did that affect you? Bryanna: man, so there was there was a point in time where I'm gonna go into two two encounters that were that really like shook me to my core. the first one was dealing with a Japanese faceless demon spirit, and it's called an operabow. And essentially what this thing does is it will take form the whole purpose of this thing like incarnating in physical form is to invoke loads of fear into you and when you're when you're fearful you are far from God you were like you believe you're far from God let's put it that way you believe you're far and so this this was at a point in time where I was like deep in like psychedelics and so you know the the barrier between like psychosis and like being fully present was very, very thin. And so at one point I was supposed to I I knew I was gonna be meeting my mom like later that day, but I was in my basement and at a house I was staying at and I was, you know, taking a shower before I was gonna go. And I'm just like in this like I felt like I was in this in between, like where I didn't even really feel like I was part of the world. Like I was just like half in the spirit world, half like here. And I remember this this being. It took the form of my mother. But what it did when it like, you know, was knocking on the door is it like acted all loving and kind, like my mom, right? But this was a like I had this little inkling and nudge in me, like of God like trying to be like, I'm trying to prepare you to discern spirits. And so this was before I even accepted, you know, that God was always with me, Jesus was always walking with me. And I was in this space of like, okay, I just need to feel what these things are like, like on an energy level. And there was one point where I was in the bathroom and, you know, it knocked on the door and it came in and it came in and it was my mom in full form, but no face. And I'm like, Randy: And and at this point was your mom still alive, I take it? So you thought this was a a so so you thought this was Bryanna: Yeah, my mom's still alive. Straight up thought it was my mom. Randy: a physical being. You thought this was literally your your physical mom. Bryanna: Mm-hmm. But I was like, something's off. Something's like really weird. And so I was like, I'm just in the shower. Like, give me a moment. Cause I like kind of peeked around the curtain and then I saw like no face and I was like, that's weird. And then I was like, internally, I'm like, something feels like off here. And so it like left. And then it came back and was like knocking on the door again a little harder. And was like, We're here. Like, you know, are you gonna come out? And I was like, okay, that's like really like weird. That's unsettling, you know. just something like in my spirit was just like, ooh, something just feels dark. And I was like, Yeah, hold on like a minute. And it comes back in and it starts like yelling at me. And I'm like, what the what is that? And so I was like, okay, just like give me a moment and leave. And so like I was by this point, like it left, close the door, and then I like sit down in the shower and I'm like having a meltdown because I'm like I don't what's going on. And so like my mind goes back to this is where nervous system work came in. My body dropped into a moment of where like I felt, you know, this fear around somebody that I was recently with, you know, like a traumatic experience and I was just like processing that trauma emotionally, like sitting in the shower, and then it comes back through the door and then I'm sitting on the ground in my shower and then it tries to like it's like, come on, like you need to get out of the shower and stuff. And then it's like My eyes are closed and it's like pulling my arm, right? But like instead of, you know, pulling to like feel like you're being lifted up, it was a pulling that felt like I was being dragged down to darkness. And I was like, that's just off. That's not right. And I was like, no, I just need to sit here. And so then it like stormed off and it was pissed. And it just leaves. And then the next thing I know, like, not even five minutes later, my actual mom is like knocking at the door and she's like, hey, like are you okay? And I'm like, whoa. I was like, whatever that was. And then I in, you know, my mom comes in and like I actually see her full body face, everything. And I was just like, I don't know like Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: what I just experienced, but like it was not you. So then I'm like sitting there and then I, you know, that that connection that you have with your mom of like that warmth and that spirit of like your mom, that light. When I was sitting down and then she's like, Come on, like let me help you up, like felt like Angelic, like she was lifting me and I was like, That's that's what you know, that's what a mom, like a mother feels like. Pj Verdin: Had had she heard any had she heard any of these interactions that you had just finished experiencing with this other version of your mom? Hmm. Bryanna: Mm-mm. No. Randy: Other Other Mommy. I I was gonna ask you, have you licensed this story? Because there's a movie coming out called Other Mommy that sounds exactly like this. Bryanna: She had no clue. I've heard of it. yeah. I watched part of that and I was like, oof. It kind of like took me back to that moment and I was like, gosh, no, I don't want to watch that. I like, I don't want to go back to the experiencing that. That's like that's inviting like Pj Verdin: Yeah. Like first hand first hand experience Randy: Yeah, have you have you seen that yeah, have you seen that trailer, brother? Have you seen that trailer? Yeah, Pj Verdin: right here. No, I haven't. I haven't. Randy: I we I think it was when we watched the new woke version of Troy, what was it called? Odyssey. We saw the trailer for Other Mommy Bryanna: Hmm. Randy: and it sounds like exactly what you're what you're describing. Pj Verdin: That's wild. Bryanna: Well Randy: So in anyway. Bryanna: in those movies it's like it's so interesting because like what you also like what you continuously like put yourself in front of are the things that you also allow in your life. And I used to allow like I used to love like gory horror movies, like all of it. And then it won't w once I started going through this like, you know, new age spirituality stuff and I was like realizing I watched a lot of that, a lot of these crime shows, mysteries, like whatever. then the physical manifestations of these things were starting to happen. They were starting to come to life. And I was like, I'm not a fan of this at all Yeah. Pj Verdin: Well Randy: Well yeah, you are writing your own reality, right? So if you were the god of your own universe writing your own reality, you gotta be careful what's coming in. Pj Verdin: Well I I would say real realistically, Bryanna: Exactly. Pj Verdin: you know, Pastor Mark Driscoll according to phrase, you know, New Days, old demons. I mean, they Randy: Uh-huh. Pj Verdin: they had somebody who wrote a book who was literally, you know, a non-Christian person wrote a book and was trying to figure out how over so many different like such a a a vast period of time, all over the world, different cultures, people who had no way of communic communicating with each other were like doing all the same things like evilly, like, you know, the Bryanna: Mm. Pj Verdin: the people, the men who worshipped women deities would would castrate themselves and and all these things and and they're like they could like they wrote this whole book on it and they was like, you know, not looking at it through a spiritual lens or or having any kind of faith in God, like they couldn't put their f their finger on it, but they like they're like, This is so traceable. Like the commonality is is is crazy. Bryanna: Yeah. Pj Verdin: And and so, you know, he kinda connected dots and s and says, Man New days, old demons, like they do Randy: Yeah. Pj Verdin: these things, you Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Pj Verdin: know, over and over and over. And and so I I think that you will notice parallels and similarities in in events like that, you know what I mean? Randy: Mm-hmm. Bryanna: Yeah. The the second more notable moment was right about the same time frame. probably I'd say within like two, three months of like that happening, I was like after that experience I was like, yo, like I don't know what I'm experiencing, but like Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: this sh is paranormal. And so, you know, like you go and you're like, I gotta meditate that away or like whatever, I gotta stage my house and like all that stuff. I even had a friend come to my house like After that instance, and she like was saging and everything, and she was like chased out by these spirits, like chased out of my house, like by these spirits. And like, I mean, they were slamming doors, like all this, and I'm like, yo, this house is haunted, like I got go. Like, it's not me, right? It's the house. Because I'm like, surely it's not me, right? And so Pj Verdin: Right, right, right. Yeah. Randy: Right. Bryanna: I get to this point of where like I I'm afraid to stay at this house that I'm like living in. And so I go and I I go to stay with my mom a couple nights a week, especially after like I had a whole like my whole visit to psych was not okay. Like they're just demons the literally the only thing that kept me safe during that time was I had my my grandma, my great-great-grandma's family Bible with me. And I feel like that was the only thing that kept me safe during that time because I mean, like, talk about like very disturbed dark spirits like everywhere around every corner because they're literally possessing. all of these people that are like mentally like not in a okay state of mind or like are even aware if that's what's happening in them. Randy: Mm. Bryanna: And I'm like literally like terrified, sleeping with the Bible like under the pillow because I'm like, I don't I I don't know what else to do other than just like cling to this right now. Like this feels like the only safety that I have. And so I get out and I'm like staying with my mom and I have this instance of where this demon, this is probably gonna get a little graphic, so I'm gonna I'm gonna say that. preface this for anybody that's listening. I had. Yes, Randy: Viewer discrep advised. Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: viewer discretion is advised. I did at one point have a a demonic entity that was went full poltergeist with me and was dragging me back and forth between the bedroom I was staying in and my mom's bathroom and was basically like in a sense raping me. And I was Terrified because my body was like I couldn't move. My body was immobilized. And I'm just being dragged. But it felt like internally it felt like I was like, I don't have control over this, but it f it's making me think that I'm part of like doing this too. So that was what was weird. It was like dragging me, but it felt like I was like, you know, kind of like limping like around the ground and stuff. And so it was pulling me back and forth and like had me like around the room and everything. And then at one point I remember it like pulls me like into the shower and I'm like bawling at this point because I was like, I am not, I can't, I can't move any of my limbs. Like I am not in control here. And not even at that point in time did I like know to call out to Jesus or God or anything like that. I was just like, like please stop, like, you know, just crying out. I'm sure like on a soul level, I was just like, yo, like God, like please like help, because I don't know what to do here. And I remember being sh like strung up by I think it was like the shower like court or something like that, and it was trying to like str strangle and like hang me in the shower. And I just remember being Randy: Wow. Bryanna: like let loose and then I was just like on the like on the ground, just crying and this like happened for several hours. Like this was going on for several hours until like morning time. And my my parents' next door neighbor, she had noticed that the front door like was left open. like the screen door, not like the or the main door was open, but the screen door was still like going. And so they saw that and they like, that's not normal. It's like, you know, four or five in the morning. And She comes over and then she finds me, like she calls my sister and like my sister has to come in, like while my mom and my stepdad are out of town and like my sister has to see me like looking like I was trying to kill myself in like the bathroom and I'm like I'm just crying because I was like, I don't I I don't have the words for this right now. I don't know how to explain what I just experienced. But other than Pj Verdin: Yeah. Wow. Bryanna: like I was fully like poltergeisted and like Randy: Wow. Bryanna: had no control over my body and to Like I have prayed and prayed over that like experience many times because that that one like really shook me. And it was around that same time, especially back and forth between psych, like I had a internal like visual experience of like descending into like Dante's Inferno. And like on a soul level, I was like, yo, this isn't this isn't good. Like whatever I'm Pj Verdin: Right. Randy: Well Bryanna: involved in, like, this isn't it. And this was still probably a year. year or two or two or three years before I decided to stop everything because And it was weird because like part of me like stopped, but then like went back to it because I was like, like surely it's not related, right? And then Randy: Mm-hmm. Bryanna: like bad thing after bad thing after bad thing that just like happening. It's like you get what you want, but you always pay like a greater price. And Randy: Wow. Bryanna: that's what always stuck with me. I was like, though those demons, they'll do they'll do the bidding, they'll do the answering, they'll give you the things that you want, but it always comes with a greater price. Anxiety never leaves you. Pj Verdin: Absolutely. Randy: Right, right. Bryanna: You never have peace. You never feel like you can sleep. Half the time you have nightmares and you try to call them prophetic because you're trying to rationalize what's happening to you. But it was like that Randy: Yeah. Well Bryanna: for for years. Randy: Well well thanks for sharing that. I'm I'm sure it couldn't have been easy, Brianna. You know, I think if you know, we we both me and PJ, we we believe there is, you know, a whole spiritual realm and demons are real. And, you know, I appreciate you sharing your story with us. We've shared our own personal experiences in the past where we've seen and you know, experienced things that seem far fetched and unexplainable and and so have other people who have been you know on this podcast with us so you know for anyone out there who might be thinking you know this sounds a little hard to believe you know take it for what you will but this is you know this there is something out there and you know it could be very difficult to share much less to experience so thank you for sharing that with us I would go ahead brother Pj Verdin: Hundred percent. And you don't you don't always have to Bryanna: Yeah. Pj Verdin: be you know, entertaining any kind of a cult for it to happen either, just in FYI. Bryanna: Mm. Randy: No. Yeah, definitely opens doors, Bryanna: Yeah, the Randy: but it's not exclusive to just people who dabble. Pj Verdin: Yeah, that's right. Bryanna: Yeah. The the thing that like opened doors for that, at that time I really wasn't I wasn't deep in like doing cards or anything like that. It was honestly just the use of psychedelics because you're just leaving like spiritually, you're leaving doors open because you're you're not fully present and aware and with your body. and I mean like we were just talking about the armor of God like in church this this past Sunday and To know, like, you know, there are tools that even God gives us to help protect us to, you know, every single day, like truth. And I will say, truth is the th this the thing that I was seeking this entire time. Like that was the the main question. I was like, what is truth? Like that was my main like spiritual question. And so it showed, like, God showed me what truth was, and it's like, All of these things, like all these things you're exploring, they exist. They are very real. But it does Randy: Right. Right. Bryanna: not it does not say that these things are over God. And what I've learned through that is like God has authority over all of it. And it was so crazy because the first time I went back to church was I believe it was October of this last year. And the guy that I was seeing who is now my boyfriend, we were just starting to talk and everything and he had, you know, invited me to church and I immediately was like, I don't know, like it's just kinda weird. Like, I don't know. And I was still like in my occult stuff. Randy: Was this was this before you had gotten saved or after? Bryanna: This was before. So this was my coming to being saved. Mm-hmm. I Randy: It was okay, it was so you still weren't saved yet. Gotcha. Okay. Bryanna: was still doing like cards, but I had like backed away from doing cards a lot. Like it was every now and then Randy: Okay. Bryanna: I would do a reading. I stopped doing like I slowly and gradually, like as I kept asking to for truth to be revealed, I stopped feeling the attraction and pulse to like pick up cards or do a candle ritual or like, you know, talk to Gaia, whatever. Like I slowly was like moving away from it, but I didn't understand. I was like, I'm just like Just being lazy, like with my practice, whatever, like you know, the enemy will tell you all these things, right? Like, you're not, Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: you're not good in your practice because you're not consistent, whatever. And I was being led away from all of it. And so then he invites me to church. And I remember the the morning of we were going to church, but before I met him, we were sitting in the Target parking lot because we were gonna ride together. And I just remember crying. I was crying and I was just like, I I remember have a video I recorded myself. I was like, I'm scared. I'm I don't know. Like I don't know. Pj Verdin: Mm. Bryanna: This is the first time going back to church in years and like like what if I'm being like what if I'm gonna be judged? What if you know, what if like, you know, you know, this part of you like that's so separated from God for so long is just like, what if I just burst into flames when I walk through the door, like what you know, like I've been involved in so much of this stuff that like what if I what if I can't find peace or love or like community here, right? So was terrified Randy: Mm-hmm. Bryanna: and I'm just crying and I was like, okay, like here goes nothing. And we've been going there ever since. And I Pj Verdin: Amen. Bryanna: got baptized. I got baptized on New Year's Eve. So literally went down in twenty twenty five, came up in twenty twenty six, saved. So Pj Verdin: That's dope. That's dope. Randy: So so you meant Bryanna: yeah. Randy: you started to mention earlier that you you know, you and Gina were on similar paths. You were both kind of Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Randy: dabbling in the occult, you started working together, and then you mentioned someone, I can't remember maybe was it Amber or someone's Bryanna: Ember, yeah. Randy: Amber started to tell you guys some things about Jesus. How did that play into the whole, you know, you you getting Bryanna: So Randy: saved? Bryanna: we we all had previously been with the New Age and Occult Practices, all of us. And Randy: Okay. Bryanna: so she was still pretty new to her journey. She was within like the first year of being saved and everything. Randy: So Amber Amber was in the occult as well. And she had gotten saved before you guys? Okay. Sorry, go ahead. Bryanna: Mm-hmm. And so Yep. So it was Ember, Gina, and then me. So Gina Randy: Okay. Bryanna: got baptized I think a month or so or a month or two before me. so then when, you know, Ember started telling Gina a little bit more because they were a lot closer, then, you know, that spiritual like relationship God was working there. And then there was still like this aversion to like us listening to some of the things that Ember was saying, because you know, we were still kind Randy: Mm. Bryanna: of like being sanctified, but really like still somewhat walking, you know, with with things that are not of God. And so that was like this this internal like struggle of like, all these things that I like had accepted over the years, like that I thought I was so right in. I thought I had, you know, spiritual authority to talk on, like all this stuff, right? I was a spiritual coach. I knew what I was doing. Well like you couldn't tell me anything. Like I don't know all the Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: forbidden knowledge. Like we we just started questioning more of it. And then when the the one question was always, What's the source of everything? What's the source? Randy: Mm. Bryanna: Where did it originate from? Like that's what helped us discern a lot of like, Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: okay, is this is this Christ rooted? Any of any of this stuff. Randy: So it sounds like your friend Ember and maybe even Gina to a certain extent, you know, kind of was leading the way and maybe planting some seeds in your life, and then your boyfriend was inviting you to church. And it sounds like the Holy Spirit was Bryanna: Very Randy: doing some work and in calling you. like I Bryanna: Really? Randy: mentioned earlier, you know, if people say if you can't tell me about the time when you accepted Christ, maybe it's because you haven't. So tell me about when you actually like either prayed the sinner's prayer or you, you know, went to an altar call or what did that look like for you where you, you know, believed that, hey, from this moment, this is the moment where I said yes to Jesus and I repented. Bryanna: You know, it was it was kind of interesting because the like Jesus was always knocking, right? He's always knocking. Randy: Mm-hmm. Bryanna: He would find little ways and little moments that he would just knock. like I remember one instance where I went to Santa Caligon days and independence and it like in September, and I had a lady like outside of a church. she just asked if she could pray for me. and so I was like, Okay, like, you know, retrospect, Jesus knocking on the door. And I was like, Will you answer? Like, I'm waiting patiently. Pj Verdin: I well, I just think it's funny, you know, like you said, a lot of your your journey into the new age was because you were looking at the truth and Jesus is the truth and and so he was like Are are you calling me or not? And you're like, No, not not you truth. I'm looking for a different truth that you know, it just kind of Yeah. Right, right, right, yeah, yeah. Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Well Randy: Mm-hmm. The concept of truth, not the person. Pj Verdin: So Bryanna: and then people, you know, would it like every now and then I would get somebody who would ask me, you know, like, well, I mean, like, you feel the way you do about God, right? 'Cause I was like, well, God, universe, creator, like same thing, whatever, right? Wrong. But that's where that's where I was. Pj Verdin: Yeah. Yeah. Randy: A lot of people feel that way. Right. Bryanna: That's where I was at that point in time. So I was just like, well, I mean, like, I believe Jesus was, you know, a guy, like whatever, like and then I I really didn't understand his story, like truly understand it. but then there was like I don't know, there was just one day when I think Gina asked me, she was like, Well, like you acknowledge that that Jesus is real, right? And then you've heard Jesus' story, by that point. And she was like Have you I think she had asked me, she's like, Well, I don't know, it just kind of came about because I was like, you know, I'm just I'm just gonna accept Jesus, but I had never, you know, prayed the sinner's prayer, like where I've fully like declared like Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I just remember Randy: Mm-hmm. Bryanna: it was one day she'd asked me, she's like, I mean, have you said the prayer? And I was like, No, I actually I don't think I have. And so it was just some random day. I probably could probably never tell you the exact date, but it was during, you know, from October to December Pj Verdin: That's how that's how it is for that's how it is for me. Yeah. Randy: That's okay. Bryanna: of last year, some point in time during then. because I had been going to church and I was like, okay, like I'm starting to, you know, pry open a little bit, you know. He was he had his foot in the door and he's like, Okay, like come on. Like, are you gonna Pj Verdin: Right, right, right. Bryanna: let me in fully? and so, you know, the more like I would go to the sermons and then I would you know, talk with my friends like who are, you know, even newer believers. I was just like, okay, like let me just I guess just let Holy Spirit like work, right? Just little by little, just he he kept debunking like all of the like what I was believing in before him. And I I kind of like have this I kind of have this belief that I was like, Jesus has always been walking with me. I just finally acknowledged it. Like that's the thing is he'd never he never left me. He never left me in the moment where I was like being dragged around like by, you know, a demonic spirit, an entity. He was never leaving me when, you know, like I was dealing with that faceless, you know, demonic entity. He was always there. I just didn't know that it was it was him. And Randy: Mm. Bryanna: even in that same time frame of when I dealt with the faceless demon spirit and I think it was like right before then or after then. It was around that time frame. I do remember a it was like a Godwink moment, but it was like a whole supernatural experience of where I can never I cannot explain where this thing came from. But it was this little tiny medallion, like when I was dealing with all of this stuff that showed up in my apartment floor in my bedroom. And it was just this tiny little medallion about this size, it was silver. and or silver plated and it was about the Lady of Olives. And the story of the Lady of Olives is there is this, you know, va this church in a valley, and then they had like a fire and it burned down everything in the church except for the cross. And so the whole story, 'cause it was like Mount Olive was like the area I guess it was in. And so they were talking about how, you know, Mary like can come and she can protect us too, like during those times like when especially women are going through hardships and trials. So that little medallion like showed up. I was like, I couldn't explain it. I asked all my friends, family, whoever had been in my apartment around that time frame. They're like, This isn't mine. I'm like, Whoa. So I was like at that point I was like, Yo, God's real. Like he's he's listening, he's watching, like he's here. Like I he whoever left it dropped it, like And a little like piece of protection and I had I had worn that thing like for another like year or two like after I kept it with me because I was like, I don't know like what's going on, but while I was dabbling with all this stuff, I wasn't putting two and two together. That was his invitation, like, yo, come my way and like ditch this stuff. Randy: Right. Right. So so it sounds like it was quite the journey where Jesus was walking with you, calling you, Holy Spirit was doing some work through multiple people. You finally, you Bryanna: I don't know. Randy: know, prayed the sinner's prayer, accepted Jesus Christ. Sounds like Gina walked you through that. and it sounds like it's all pretty recently, less than a year ago, right? So Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Randy: so what has changed in your life now? I'm I'm gonna assume you probably are not dabbling in the occult anymore. Bryanna: I think Randy: but you tell me, what does your life look like now? What has the been the bigger things that have changed since you have, you know, accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, Brianna? Bryanna: Oof there was the biggest thing that like has really landed for me was the internal peace. I just remember one day being in church and I was just like, man, I just wanna I wanna know what the peace of Jesus feels like. And all like everything in me just like kinda like a like it melts all like in your cozy clothes right next to a fire, but like even more warmth Pj Verdin: Yep. Bryanna: than that. Pj Verdin: Yep. Bryanna: Just like this peace settled over me, and I was like, whoa, I think for the first time in my entire life, I actually feel calm. Like I'm not on edge, like I'm not like, you know, like in a in a calm, like where you're like in elation because you know, you've used like psychedelics or whatever. Like it was just pure Pj Verdin: No. Bryanna: calm. Calm internally, calm state of mind. Like, just like God's got me. And he just sat with me and I'm like. And even through like the trials and the tribulations now, like that we are going that we go through, like my dog broke his femur, like, you know, we've we've got, you know, custody stuff with my boyfriend's kid and like we've got all these other things happening, but like there's still this just like God's Randy: Sure. Bryanna: got me. And whatever's gonna come of it, like he's always in it. And we have more trust and there's a lot less anxiety. Like my day to day, a lot less anxious. a lot more Pj Verdin: Amen. Bryanna: ability to rest without, you know, feeling the shame or the guilt around rest. That's been huge. and then just day to day There's more of a renewed sense of like even though I don't know exactly sorry guys, kinda timing out there. even though sometimes I don't know exactly what's gonna happen, I I feel like, okay, it's gonna be fine. Like I'm gonna be guided. Like Holy Spirit's gonna guide me, Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: God's gonna guide me, somebody somewhere is gonna say something that like sparks my inspiration to do something, or even Like recently it's like, but whatever I choose, God'll have me in too. So that's Randy: Yeah. Bryanna: that's changed significantly 'cause it's shifted everything around career, work, like what I do to like serve others. It's shifted the entire landscape of that. I don't feel rushed to do something. Randy: So so yeah, so tell tell us more about that. Cause that's a yeah, sorry. So that's exactly where I was going next. So tell me, tell me more about that. How does how does you know being a believer affect you in your in your work that you do as an entrepreneur, as a business owner? How does that show up in your day to day life now that you, you know, it sounds like you maybe started, you know, your business. prior to accepting Christ, now you've accepted Christ, I gotta imagine it's infected your business. Bryanna: Yeah, it's actually kind of funny. I had a whole like spiritual based business before where I was doing the spiritual coaching, but with all of those other tools and modalities. And then as time went on it shifted and I was like, well, I don't wanna do, you know, the cards and I wanna do the things like this. And so that's where I took where I was like, R E B T, like that's a great tool. Like, NLP, that's a great tool. Like, you Randy: Mm. Bryanna: know, habit tracking, like these are all great like tools that you can use and they're not like spiritually rooted in like other things. And so it refined into like the last bit of like my previous business, which was magnetic mojo. So it was like coaching, but it was like a whole different spirit. Randy: Magnetic mojo. Bryanna: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Which is which means magnetic like magic, you know? So it's just kind of funny like how that all happened. So I Pj Verdin: Yeah. Right. Bryanna: decided I was like, you know what? Screw this. I like, I'm walking with Christ now. Like I'm just gonna ditch that business. Like it shut it down. Like Randy: Well. Bryanna: Literally the sh the shutdown of the business happened without me even knowing. Like and I was like, Well pfft, that's fine. I was like, I don't care. So Pj Verdin: Yeah. That's wild. Randy: Mm-hmm. Bryanna: I just started a new LLC and I was like, Okay, like I really wanna I was like I really want to even if I'm not like fully talking about like Christ in my business, like I still wanna be able to like give him glory in like what I'm creating now. And so that's where Living Flow Systems came about. you know, living in flow with God and, you know, whatever Pj Verdin: Amen. Bryanna: he's working on in your life, but really it was like moving with whatever's like in your body too, like nervous system wise, like building Randy: Gotcha. Bryanna: systems that are built for human capacity. And that's it's just naturally like how it came about. and it's Pj Verdin: That's cool. Bryanna: funny 'cause every time I do work with somebody, it's like before I work with somebody I kind of like almost forget like that I'm that I'm pretty good at it. You know, I was like, okay. Pj Verdin: Yeah. Bryanna: And I was like, well he he gave me these gifts to be able to work with so it just comes naturally now. Randy: Well you well, you just gave Pj Verdin: Yeah. Randy: me an idea for another business. I just I just couldn't Bryanna: Mm. Randy: help but thinking, you know, people will pay to go sit down and have someone read their tarot cards. I'm gonna start a business where I just read the Bible to people. They come to me, they tell me about what they want to know, and then I just re read a Bible passage that I think is related to their situation. We can still Pj Verdin: Yeah. Yeah. Randy: do it in the dark room if that makes them feel better with candles and and all the everything. Bryanna: Yeah, yeah, it was a cozy little fireplace. Randy: But instead of like, you know, pulling out something evil, I'm just gonna say, Pj Verdin: Yeah. Randy: you know what that sounds like? That sounds like, you know, Proverbs chapter three might be a good chapter. Let's read this together. I think there's something to that. Pj Verdin: yeah. I like Bryanna: We we tried like there was a part of when we were like completely being sanctified where it was like you're still trying to hold on to some of the old practices 'cause you're like, surely not all of it's bad, right? Like everything that I Pj Verdin: Mm-hmm. Randy: Right. Bryanna: was doing wasn't all wrong. Like Randy: Right. Bryanna: 'cause you don't want to feel like you don't want to feel ashamed. Like you don't want to feel bad about the choices that you made when you were when you in your intentions were trying to do it out of a pure heart. And then it's Randy: Right, right. Bryanna: like Satan can use a pure heart and still twist it for his good. Like Randy: What what do they Pj Verdin: That's Randy: say Pj Verdin: right. Randy: about the road to hell? It's paved with good intentions, right? All right, brother. Do you Pj Verdin: Yep, that's right. Randy: have a I have one more question before we wrap up, but before I do, P, I'll open it up to you. Did you have a question that you were trying to get out? Pj Verdin: no man, I it it's just it's a lot and Randy: Or comment. Pj Verdin: I I appreciate you sharing, you know, your testimony, your story. even though I'm sure some of it was tough. I will tell you this, I feel like this is probably gonna be one of those episodes where I'm gonna have to Google the most abbreviations, because there's a lot of things that got thrown out and I I'm I'm just curious, but but yeah, it it's it's been awesome. I I appreciate you Bryanna: Yeah. Pj Verdin: you sharing and And come and hang out and have this conversation with us. Bryanna: Yeah, I I mean I appreciate it, man. You know, the devil's kinda funny. He w tried to try to get me to like Randy texted me this morning and I was just like, I don't know. And I was like, no, that is that is Satan, the enemy trying to like get in the way. What do you mean? Pj Verdin: Get behind me, Satan. Yep. A hundred percent. Yeah. Randy: There there's always so many obstacles and roadblocks, you know, especially when you're on to something. And, you know, we decided as we, you know, have been having these conversations, just the two of us, that you know, we want other people to tell their story. So we're super appreciative that you were able to come on and and join us today and share your story. but we are pretty much at our time, Bree. So one last Bryanna: Okay. Randy: thing I have for you before we go, Is there any anything that we haven't covered that God has put on your heart that you would want to share with someone who might be listening today? And is there any particular Bible passage Bryanna: Yeah. Randy: that you would want to leave us with? Bryanna: Hmm. three brief things. One, God's ability to forgive is greater than our ability to sin. Just putting Pj Verdin: Come on. Randy: Amen. Bryanna: that one out there. It's like you can't sin more than God can love you. So if you Pj Verdin: That's right. Bryanna: are struggling and you think like you've done too much, you've gone too far, like he doesn't care. The the Randy: Amen. Bryanna: He wants the lost one over the 99 so bad and he will chase you down until you answer. Like cause Pj Verdin: That's right. Bryanna: he loves you that much. He wants to save you that much. like I've I felt that and like he came for me and like he came guns ablazin. So I'm so grateful that he did. And the verse that really got me through even before I was acknowledging and walking with Christ was Philippians four thirteen, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. but more than anything like Whatever you are dabbling in that makes like the thing about sin is like Satan will also have you come into tiny micro agreements where this is where the new age stuff gets really dangerous. You'll come into tiny microagreements of where you're just barely like coming out of the truth of what God is bringing and showing you that it's like little tiny agreements just lead you farther and farther and farther away. Cause like all of this stuff in the New Age occult spirituality stuff. Like there's a lot of truth behind it, but it's so ever slightly distorted because of like all of the little stories and intricate things and like where they come from, like it will lead you farther and farther away until you feel like you're too far to even come back to God. So if you are out there and you have questioned like what you're doing, like is it actually bringing something that is gonna sustain and be building long term, like look at the fruit. Look at the fruit of anything that you're building. Is it gonna last? Because that's also gonna reveal to you like what is of God and what is not. Because everything else that I used to have in the past, it's no longer here. Like it's gone. Everything else is like completely gone. The only thing that remains is the stories and the experiences that help other people come to salvation. Pj Verdin: Come on. Amen. Randy: Awesome. Well, thank you. I think that's a a great place for us to end. thank you again so much for being on with us today and for being open and honest and transparently sharing your story and your testimony with everybody. really appreciate having you on. And for anybody out there who is you know listening today, hopefully, you know, this helps you in some way, shape, or form. We appreciate you listening and following and liking and subscribing to the show. Appreciate you guys all so much. And last thing before you go, make sure that you let us know what you think down in the comments below. God bless. Pj Verdin: God bless.